Cowboy Who?

In the 1800s, populist president Andrew Jackson went head-to-head with the most powerful banker in America over who should control the country's money. This clash ended in disastrous results.

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Neils Bohr said, “It is wrong to think that the task of physics is to find out how Nature is. Physics concerns what we can say about Nature.” Well it turns out that if we pay attention to this subtle difference, some of the most mysterious aspects of nature make a lot more sense.

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Drugs and Peer Pressure
Myers
1995

I think this is probably the billionth “drugs are bad” book posted. I think they are almost identical in format, message and I am willing to bet the same stupid photos. Actually I should call these books the Drugs and <fill in any condition> series.

We have Drugs and….

• pregnancy (and smoking)
• parents
• birth defects
• anger (version 1)
• anger (version 2)
• domestic violence

Every time I look at the pics in all of the books mentioned, I just want to cringe. Sometimes, they don’t make sense of the “story” or example, sometimes it looks like they are trying too hard. I think my teen self would have rolled my eyes at the teenagers presented. Some of the teens look to be in their early 40s.

Generally, the content is almost identical. Also, no real solutions are given other than to just say no. A few will have referral information. Of course if we are posting these books, I am quite certain the books are more than 20 years old, so I doubt any of the contact info is still appropriate, even if the organizations exist. Can we just agree to retire these books?

Mary

The post Under Pressure! appeared first on Awful Library Books.

While Mason jars were originally created as a way to preserve food via canning, they're now being used in a variety of functional and decorative projects. In this blog post, let's explore some neat projects on Instructables that can be made using Mason jars! 

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This post, I had to clean up after my boss’s toddler, refusing to interview after business hours, and more , was originally published by Alison Green on Ask a Manager.

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…

1. I had to clean up after my boss’s toddler

I’m a new intern in a small office. My supervisor brings her adorable almost-two-year-old into the office. No big deal, she’s very cute and it’s a small office. A coworker and I clean up every day, but one day my boss asked me to clean this big office/meeting room. There were crackers everywhere. They only have a handheld vacuum so I wasn’t even sure it would pick it all up. I had to look everywhere since the crackers/food got everywhere, not to mention a dirty diaper in the waste bin. I quickly realized it was her daughter’s mess.

I mentioned this to my coworker and it turns out the supervisor has been making my coworker clean up after her and her daughter for months. Can she make us clean after her daughter? She words it as, “This office needs to be cleaned.” No asking.

Legally? Sure*. Legally your boss can require you to do pretty much anything, as long as it’s not illegal or assigned in a way that would violate discrimination laws (like assigning tasks by race or gender). But legalities aside, having you clean up after her toddler is bad management, disrespectful, and not what you’re there to do. It would be one thing if it were an emergency — like she had to leave unexpectedly and a client meeting was booked for that room later — and she apologized profusely for asking. But that’s not this; to the contrary, she’s apparently been requiring it of your coworker for months. Your boss just sucks.

Is she fairly senior, or more of a low-level supervisor? If the latter, you and/or your coworker could consider bringing this to the attention of someone with more authority who might intervene.

* If your internship is unpaid, that could change the answer — unpaid internships are subject to different rules than paid employment, and need to be for your benefit rather than the employer’s (with some exceptions, like nonprofits). Cleaning up crumbs and a dirty diaper is not for your benefit.

2. Someone is sullying our toilet seat

Since the fall when our university resumed in-person classes and some faculty have returned to the office, someone in my office wing has been frequently leaving pee on the toilet seat of the bathroom that about 15 people share. Because there have only been a few of us regularly in the office, I have a fairly good idea of who it is, but at the suggestion of my wife (a regular reader of your column), I’m stopping myself from seeking out any more information along that line.

But I (a cis man) sometimes need to sit on the toilet, and I don’t think I should have to wipe up a coworker’s urine to be able to do this. And if I don’t clean it up, then there’s a chance the next person in the bathroom will think that I made the mess.

I wrote a note to the effect of “please don’t make your colleagues clean your urine off the toilet seat” that I posted above the toilet. It was ripped down the next day, and there were fresh drops of pee on the toilet seat. Oh well.

It’s the end of the academic year so I know nothing will change in the short term. But looking ahead to the fall, what if anything can I do? I’m tempted to re-post the sign until it stops, but I know that could well escalate. Can I bring the issue up with my department chair so that they can perhaps issue some official guidance/reminder to everyone in the office wing? Any advice on how to deal with this almost daily imposition would be very much appreciated!

I’d love to tell you there’s a reliable solution, but there isn’t. People who do this generally aren’t deterred by signs or official reminders. Either they’re unaware that they’re doing it and so don’t think the signs/reminders apply to them … or they are aware and are antisocial enough that they don’t care. You can try requesting a more official reminder from above or from your facilities people. You should try, because it’s gross (especially if this is the only toilet for all of you, which it sounds like it might be?). But this is traditionally a very hard thing to stamp out when you’re working with someone who does it.

3. Can I refuse to interview candidates after business hours?

Staffing, as you know, has been a ridiculous obstacle since the pandemic started, particularly in healthcare. I am not in a position to make it difficult for people to interview with me because we are desperate for quality staff, but we start at 6 or 6:30 am. This means I often start to get texts and calls from doctors and staff at 5 am, which means I am working at 5 am.

Problem: Candidates who are working can usually only meet/speak after work, in the evenings, or on weekends. I max out (physically/mentally/emotionally) at about 55-60 hours/week. I just can’t do most evenings/weekends, but I don’t want to miss out on a good candidate because of this. I do try to do some evening/weekend interviews, but it’s awful.

I have tried saying, “My working day typically begins at 6 am and I am therefore unable to meet after 5:30 pm,” but it doesn’t work. I get replies like, “I can meet with you after 7 pm or on Saturday.”

I would love some perspective: How much would I be missing out on by having a hard rule about interview times being only during a normal work day? Am I driving myself crazy for little to no gain? Looking for the voice of reason, please.

It’s not unreasonable to only do interviews during business hours. It’s healthy to have boundaries on when you’re available and how many hours you’re working each week.

And generally job candidates do expect that they’ll need to find a way to interview during business hours. However, the current job market means they might be a lot less incentivized to do it than previously (when they might not have had a choice).

I can’t tell you how much you’ll be missing out on by having a hard and fast rule about your availability; it will depend on your field, the specific jobs you’re hiring for, and what happens when you try it. If you find you have enough good candidates who can interview during business hours, it’s not inherently unreasonable to pass on the the ones who can’t (although I’d still make an exception for someone who seems truly exceptional).

But if you’re finding that holding firm on those boundaries means you can’t hire enough people, you do need to change something. That shouldn’t mean working 13-hour days, though; instead, look for other solutions. For example, can you flex your schedule for a few days to accommodate candidates, starting a few hours later than you normally would? Presumably when you’re sick or on vacation, your colleagues make do without being able to reach you at 5 am; what if you framed it as just as necessary in this situation too?

4. I regret accepting a counteroffer

I recently (within the past month) received an unsolicited job offer with a new company (she was a former manager of mine and had reached out without me applying). The offer was substantially higher but the benefits were much less comprehensive than my current role. I ultimately decided to leave anyway and put in my notice. Within hours of putting in my notice, my grandboss contacted me with a counteroffer. This counter put me at more than the offer I had previously received, but would shift my position to a more senior level role. I ended up taking the counter.

Since taking the counter, I have regretted my decision. While the benefits in this role are what led me to stay (I am currently undergoing fertility treatment, which is covered by my current company, and also would have generous parental leave if successful), the work life balance and stress in the new role as well as my previous role has become unsustainable. I am consistently stressed, I am working at minimum 50+ hour weeks, and I feel like I am still drowning. I had reservations about moving to the next level initially but was reassured that I was ready and would have support. The thing is they currently have me assisting with my previous tasks as well as slowly taking on new tasks. Additionally, due to several changes on my team, the morale is extremely low and most of the employees are burnt out.

The previous position which I backed out of only five days before starting is still open. The colleague who I worked with previously was gracious when I let her know as well. She mentioned that if I decided at a later date to make a move she would still be open to it. Do you think it would be a terrible idea to reach back out and explain that I am open to a move at this time?

Nope. You’ve got nothing to lose, and your contact there specifically told you she was open to it.

This won’t work in every situation. If you accept an offer, then pull out to stay at your current employer instead, and then say “wait, actually, I’d like to accept your offer after all,” a lot of employers will understandably be wary; they’ll worry you might change your mind again in a few weeks (or worse, in a few months, after they’ve invested in training you). But because the person who recruited you knows you and has managed you before — and invited you to do this if you changed your mind — you’ve got as good a shot as anyone could at making it work.

That said, you mentioned that this offer fell in your lap and you hadn’t been looking. Before you call them back to see if you can still accept it, make sure this is the job you really want and it’s not just an easy escape from your current situation. The choice isn’t necessarily between that job and your current job; if this one isn’t right for you (because of the benefits or the work itself or anything else), you could also look at other jobs to see if you can find something that beats them both.

5. Can my company make me pay expenses if I get Covid on a business trip?

I travel regularly for work, and we’re now returning to frequent trips. If I get Covid while on a business trip, who pays for the extended hotel stay, new flight, etc. until I’m cleared to come back? It sure seems like it shouldn’t be me, but I’m guessing my company doesn’t have a policy at all. Any suggestions on how to make the case that it should be a company expense?

Yes — ethically you shouldn’t have to cover those costs since you’d be incurring them only because you were traveling for work. It’s unlikely that your company would balk at paying for the new return flight (they have to fly you home at some point; it would be pretty unusual to refuse to cover your ticket back just because the date has to change for reasons outside your control). The hotel costs should be just as clear-cut, but there’s more of a risk your company won’t see it that way.

Ideally you’d raise this now. You should be able to be pretty straightforward about it: “Since we’re ramping our travel back up, we need a policy on how to handle expenses if someone gets Covid while traveling and can’t return until they’re cleared to fly.” If your company seems at all reluctant, it’s reasonable to say you’re hesitant to travel in a pandemic without assurance that you won’t be personally responsible for extended stay costs. If you have coworkers who will be traveling too, you’ll have more power if you all push for it together.

This post, our uniform policy is ludicrous and pisses me off constantly , was originally published by Alison Green on Ask a Manager.

A reader writes:

I am an engineering manager in a manufacturing plant, which is a customer- and executive-facing role. Our plant has a uniform policy that requires all employees to wear a shirt with a company logo and jeans. In a sister plant (same company), office workers and managers are not required to wear the company shirts, but instead have the flexibility to dress for their role. When my boss from a neighboring county visits our plant, he doesn’t wear a company shirt, nor does his boss, or any other corporate visitor. The enforcement of the company shirts on salaried staff/managers all boils down to the preference of our general manager, Bob, and his entire reasoning is that he doesn’t want the hourly production workers to feel demoralized because of perceived inequality in the dress code.

This is obviously problematic for many reasons. First, I see no problem with the perception that managers are not equal with hourly staff — we’re not! They report to us. (Of course I’m speaking purely of corporate hierarchies and not human equality.) Our jobs are totally different, which means our clothing requirements are totally different. Secondly, the uniform policy is actually a huge step down from what I would prefer to wear when, for example, customers visit. Under our policy, any shirt goes for any occasion as long as it has a company logo. Bob is adamant that customer and executive visits are “business as usual” and we should not dress any differently on those days.

Every month, we provide themed T-shirts to our employees, and these are permissible for day-to-day wear as part of the “uniform.” These are crappy, cheap, rumpled T-shirts with goofy graphics and slogans on them. Under our current policy, I’m in violation if I wear nice slacks and a dressy blouse for a customer visit, but I’m perfectly compliant when greeting a customer in faded jeans and a wrinkled T-shirt with a silly graphic on it. It makes zero logical sense. It feels like we’re enforcing the policy to the point of lunacy for the purpose of appeasing our hourly workforce, who probably have zero expectation that we dress exactly like they do.

There are other major problems with the policy, as well. We are given a pittance for an annual allowance that will buy exactly two nice collared shirts or several crappy T-shirts once per year. There are extremely limited options for women, and even fewer options for plus-sized women. I’d estimate that the women’s offerings are about one-third of the styles offered to men, and only half of those are offered in larger sizes than a very small 2X. I am at the top of the size range for the women’s shirt offerings, even though I’m at the small end of the typical plus size range in regular stores. If I gain even a small amount of weight, there will be zero options for me.

We’re allowed to purchase our own shirts and have them embroidered with the logo, and over the past few years, I’ve spent literally HUNDREDS of dollars out of my own pocket trying to find shirts that fit, that hold up, and that look office appropriate, and then having them embroidered. Oh, and to top it all off, the company has been through multiple mergers, complete with a total company name and logo change. So I literally just donated two trash bags full of shirts purchased with my own money because the logo is now obsolete.

I’ve tried to just accept that this is a condition of working here, but I can’t let it go. It pisses me off — royally and constantly. Having my clothing selected for me, discussed, and continuously scrutinized is also, honestly, very violating and triggering for me, for a number of reasons. It would be slightly easier to accept if the policy were a corporate mandate required at all plants, or if there was a really good reason for it (customer requirements, product requirements, etc.). But there isn’t. It all comes down to the preference of one thin man with a huge blind spot.

I’ve gone to HR (who agrees with me but feels powerless to change it). I’ve gone to Bob directly and pointed out the sexism and fatphobia. He acted sympathetic but nothing changed. I’ve had employees come to my office begging for shirts because theirs were ruined and they didn’t have the money to replace them. I’m really angry about having to enforce a policy I do not believe in that just does not work in practice. I’ve spent as much capital as I feel I can spend on this, but no one is listening.

I’m not in a position to leave this job and, for many other reasons, I really don’t want to. What else can I do, without burning bridges? Go over Bob’s head? Get a bunch of people together and push back as a group? I’ve thought about wearing nothing but the crappy T-shirts, day after day, regardless of the occasion, but I’m afraid that won’t get the message across, and it will just harm my reputation with customers and executives. Is this a situation where I should just stop spending my own money and stop following the policy because it’s laughably impossible, and then just throw a hissy fit if I’m ever “coached” about it?

I know my email is long and ragey. But it’s an accurate reflection of how I feel about this policy. Please help.

Yeah, this is ridiculous.

A few options, depending on how much you’re willing to push:

1. Inform Bob and HR, in writing, that if they want you and your team to comply with the policy, they will need to offer an equivalent number of options for women as they do for men, and an expanded size range that fit all of your employees. Then say this: “Otherwise, the burden of complying is higher on women, and legally that’s not something we can do.” (This is true! Courts have generally held that dress codes can’t be more onerous for one sex than the other.) From there, you could try just … not complying with the policy and not enforcing it with your team. If Bob pushes back on that, you can again point out the legal liability and suggest he escalate it to your legal department if you have one (or an outside lawyer if you don’t) so that the company isn’t at risk.

2. Go over Bob’s head and ask his boss to intervene, making the points above and pointing out that Bob’s instructions also have you dressing inappropriately for customer visits. Whether or not this is a good option depends on what Bob’s boss is like.

3. Pushing back as a group is always an option too. Bob sounds like he might not be susceptible to pressure from below him, but you could give it a shot. My hunch, though, is that you’ll have more success with options 1 or 2 instead — and 1 is where I’d start.

For what it’s worth, I’d bet that if your hourly production workers have concerns about inequality in your company, they’re much more likely to care about pay than t-shirts … and I assume Bob isn’t as passionate on that.

Many items are added to the Internet Archive’s collections every month, by us and by our patrons. Here’s a round up of some of the new media you might want to check out. Logging in might be required to borrow certain items. 

Notable new collections from our patrons: 

• Bandwagon: The Journal of the Circus Historical Society
• Console Living Room: Atari Lynx
• U.S. Senate – A collection of hearing videos across all committees from the United States Senate. 
• CDi Collection – A collection of CDi (Interactive CD-ROM) CD-ROMs from the 1990s and 2000s.

Books – 52,300 New items in May

This month we’ve added books on varied subjects in more than 20 languages. Click through to explore, but here are a few interesting items to start with:

Audio Archive – 89,325 New Items in May

The audio archive contains recordings ranging from alternative news programming, to Grateful Dead concerts, to Old Time Radio shows, to book and poetry readings, to original music uploaded by our users. Explore.

LibriVox Audiobooks – 92 New Items in May

Founded in 2005, Librivox is a community of volunteers from all over the world who record audiobooks of public domain texts in many different languages. Explore.

78 RPMs and Cylinder Recordings – 112 New Items in May

Listen to this collection of 78rpm records, cylinder recordings, and other recordings from the early 20th century. Explore.

Live Music Archive – 807 New Items in May

The Live Music Archive is a community committed to providing the highest quality live concerts in a lossless, downloadable format, along with the convenience of on-demand streaming (all with artist permission). Explore.

Netlabels – 223 New Items in May

This collection hosts complete, freely downloadable/streamable, often Creative Commons-licensed catalogs of ‘virtual record labels’. These ‘netlabels’ are non-profit, community-built entities dedicated to providing high quality, non-commercial, freely distributable MP3/OGG-format music for online download in a multitude of genres. Explore.

Movies – 110 New Items in May

Watch feature films, classic shorts, documentaries, propaganda, movie trailers, and more! Explore.

The post New additions to the Internet Archive for May 2022 appeared first on Internet Archive Blogs.

Click here to go see the bonus panel!

Hovertext:
Joke's on you. The whole thing was a poem about life.

Today's News:

Tom Gill sent this to us, with the suggestion “Why can’t more scientific papers have evocative, poetic titles like this?  I mean, it sounds more like a song than a technical article.”

The study is:

“The Strength of the Evening Wind,” A. Lapworth, Boundary-Layer Meteorology, vol. 183, 2022, pp. 215–225.

Judith Enck, a former EPA regional administrator, the president of Beyond Plastics, and a visiting professor at Bennington College, and Jan Dell, a chemical engineer and the founder of the Last Beach Cleanup, write in a piece: Americans support recycling. We do too. But although some materials can be effectively recycled and safely made from recycled content, plastics cannot. Plastic recycling does not work and will never work. The United States in 2021 had a dismal recycling rate of about 5 percent for post-consumer plastic waste, down from a high of 9.5 percent in 2014, when the U.S. exported millions of tons of plastic waste to China and counted it as recycled -- even though much of it wasn't. Recycling in general can be an effective way to reclaim natural material resources. The U.S.'s high recycling rate of paper, 68 percent, proves this point. The problem with recycling plastic lies not with the concept or process but with the material itself. The first problem is that there are thousands of different plastics, each with its own composition and characteristics. They all include different chemical additives and colorants that cannot be recycled together, making it impossible to sort the trillions of pieces of plastics into separate types for processing. For example, polyethylene terephthalate (PET#1) bottles cannot be recycled with PET#1 clamshells, which are a different PET#1 material, and green PET#1 bottles cannot be recycled with clear PET#1 bottles (which is why South Korea has outlawed colored PET#1 bottles.) High-density polyethylene (HDPE#2), polyvinyl chloride (PVC#3), low-density polyethylene (LDPE#4), polypropylene (PP#5), and polystyrene (PS#6) all must be separated for recycling. Just one fast-food meal can involve many different types of single-use plastic, including PET#1, HDPE#2, LDPE#4, PP#5, and PS#6 cups, lids, clamshells, trays, bags, and cutlery, which cannot be recycled together. This is one of several reasons why plastic fast-food service items cannot be legitimately claimed as recyclable in the U.S. Another problem is that the reprocessing of plastic waste -- when possible at all -- is wasteful. Plastic is flammable, and the risk of fires at plastic-recycling facilities affects neighboring communities -- many of which are located in low-income communities or communities of color. Unlike metal and glass, plastics are not inert. Plastic products can include toxic additives and absorb chemicals, and are generally collected in curbside bins filled with possibly dangerous materials such as plastic pesticide containers. According to a report published by the Canadian government, toxicity risks in recycled plastic prohibit "the vast majority of plastic products and packaging produced" from being recycled into food-grade packaging.

Read more of this story at Slashdot.

This post, am I obligated to tell interviewers that I’m considering other jobs? , was originally published by Alison Green on Ask a Manager.

A reader writes:

When during the interview process is the right time to disclose that I am also pursuing other opportunities? Am I even obligated to disclose other opportunities to a potential new job? Is it wrong to see through an interview process if I’m not sure I even want the role in the end?

I have been in my current position for 10 years and I’m ready to make a move. So I started thinking about what’s next for me and began seeking new job opportunities.

Early in my search, I was contacted by a recruiter about a great position with lots of growth potential at another mission-oriented organization. The hiring process was very intense, took about six weeks, and entailed many meetings (virtual and in-person), test assignments, calls, etc. The recruiter did explain to me up-front what the process and timeline would look like and I agreed to it. However, during the process I realized that I have concerns about the organization, the role, and my ability to deliver as expected. Being new to this process and looking out for my own best interests, I never volunteered any of my doubts or concerns, and I never shared that I was continuing to assess other opportunities. I continued into each new step thinking “well, maybe…” and decided not to let my doubts affect my thoughts until the time came that I received an offer. Well, the interview process went well and I was surprised to receive a great offer well above the listed salary. The hiring team indicated that I was the perfect, and only, candidate for the job and they were excited for my acceptance.

While the offer feels almost too good to be true, and I now have dollar signs for eyes, there was still something holding me back from accepting right away — especially one other job I’m interviewing for that is well paid and fun with a remote schedule.

When I asked for time to think the offer over, things took a weird turn with both the recruiter (who seemed shocked I had doubts and was still entertaining other offers) and the hiring team, who seemed to think I was going to be an immediate “yes!” These reactions have triggered some self-doubt around whether I was wrong not to be clear with both the recruiter and the hiring manager that I had other irons in the fire. Should I have told them sooner?

From my perspective, I was led to believe that I was one of several candidates they were considering, so I certainly couldn’t have been sure that I would even receive an offer. When I expressed that to the recruiter, she indicated that I had been the only candidate for several weeks and much of the latter half of the hiring process was formality to get me into the role. Apparently, the hiring team thought I was a sure thing and is now scrambling back at square one with no chance of hiring someone before a staff member is out on medical leave.

After much reflection, I don’t think I’ll accept the offer. I’m in the early-mid stages of interviewing for other roles I am very excited about, and I know I can’t accept the first big offer I get just because the money is good if I don’t feel confident about the role being a good fit for me. I also recognize that however the hiring team and recruiter feel about my “no,” that doesn’t really matter and isn’t my concern. I have to do what’s best for me. But I can’t help but feel a little shaken by the whole thing.

So, as I forge ahead in my job hunt, how should I approach this moving forward? Is it best to keep everything close to the chest and always act 100% in my own interest, chips falling where they may? Or is it my obligation to be clear and up-front with a potential job about whether I am pursuing other roles as well since it may affect their hiring timeline or desire to keep other candidates in the running? Obviously I don’t think saying “I’m not sure if I want this job” is in my best interest during an interview process, but I feel bad now that this hiring team seems genuinely shocked. Is that just business, or should I be handling it differently?

They are being really weird.

It’s one thing for a hiring team to be a little surprised when a candidate doesn’t accept their offer. As a hiring manager, sometimes a candidate is so enthusiastic during your conversations that you do start feeling pretty confident they’ll accept (although even then, nothing is ever guaranteed and who knows if you’ll be able to come to terms on salary or other details). But it would be bizarre to assume a candidate isn’t talking to other employers too, or to believe they should disclose it if they are … and I don’t know why they would assume you knew (or cared!) that you were their only candidate. That is not how this works.

You do not need to explicitly tell employers that you’re pursuing other opportunities. It’s normally assumed, just like you assume they are talking with other candidates. (Frankly, if a candidate who actively wanted to change jobs was talking exclusively with me because they had their heart set on this particular position, I’d be concerned! There are never any guarantees at the end of an interview process, on either side.) Reasonable employers assume you have options and are looking at multiple jobs.

And no, it’s not wrong to see through an interview process if you’re not sure you’ll want the job at the end of it. The whole point of an interview process is for both sides to learn more about each other and each decide if they want to work together. You presumably don’t expect employers to only interview you if they’re sure they’ll make you an offer at the end of it, and it would be wildly unreasonable in the other direction too. That doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen — I hear from candidates all the time who were shocked they didn’t get hired, and there are interviewers who can’t believe their candidates have other options — but it’s not normal behavior, and you don’t need to plan your own conduct around it.

If you can’t make your own fertilizer for your bombs, store-bought is fine. But pay cash and don’t get it all from the same place. You’ll want to break up the purchase across various fabulous gardening stores throughout the Hamptons to avoid suspicion—even go to Sag Harbor if you have to.

When making a classic Molotov cocktail, you really only need a few simple ingredients that you can find around the house. I start by filling up an empty rosé bottle with about half a cup of good olive oil. If you don’t have any spare gasoline around the garden shed, you can always siphon from one of your neighbor’s Vespas. As for the fuel-soaked rag? A monogrammed silk dinner napkin will do beautifully. Any excess make for gorgeous centerpieces, so long as you keep them away from the candelabra. And best of all they travel beautifully; I’ve taken them all the way to Martha Stewart’s Westchester estate many a time to set fire to her craft room.

When it comes to weapons, it should come as no surprise that I feel most at home with a blade. But it’s always important to have the proper grip on your knife, whether it be for dicing tomatoes for a light spring salad or charging an enemy. If you can butcher a pork shoulder, you can certainly butcher an attacker intent on making you a martyr for the cause.

These gorgeous morning glories are a staple of my garden, but did you know that you can use their seeds to make an absolutely fabulous LSD? All you’ll need is some petroleum ether, wood alcohol, and a cookie tray. How easy is that?

A classic smoke bomb is a must-have in your arsenal to distract your enemies, but what I do to set mine apart is make these gorgeously fragrant sage and lavender smoke bombs. You’ll distract more senses than one as your adversary tries to place the floral notes of coriander in the air, giving you the perfect opportunity to flee the crime scene.

Jeffrey’s away this weekend, so I’m having some gay friends over to discuss taking down the capitalist regime by force over bruschetta and Prosecco. And no dinner party is complete without personalized place settings using the fake names everyone registered for the draft under. It’s the perfect excuse to break out the calligraphy pens that I haven’t used since I wrote that ransom note for the governor’s daughter. What’s the main course? Well, as I always say, there’s no ethical consumption under capitalism unless you’re consuming my lemon roast chicken!

A dash of pepper or mustard powder can get you a long way, whether for deviled eggs or for burning the eyes of the oppressor—but for that extra kick you’ll want to whip up some tear gas. Though a more advanced recipe, it’s always good to have some on hand—and it’s the perfect use for my canning jars when tomatoes aren’t in season. If possible, it’s best to prepare more complex recipes like this out on the veranda or in the pool shed. The same goes for explosives—it’s a delicate process not unlike keeping a soufflé from collapsing in the oven, so better to be safe than have Jeffrey return home to a demolished breakfast nook!

Speaking of explosives, a fun trick I like to use is to prepare my TNT on the night of July Fourth. That way, any mistaken eruptions get written off by the neighbors as the annual fireworks display over the East Hampton shoreline.

Sometimes it just isn’t possible to whip up a pipe bomb or batch of homemade grenades every time you want to burn the system to the ground—so here’s a simpler option that, in my opinion, is even more destructive than setting a government building ablaze: prepare your lemon squares without using the juice of two freshly squeezed lemons. That’s right, use bottled lemon juice. I might be polarizing some with this more radical viewpoint, but sometimes drastic measures like bottled lemon juice are the only way to destroy a corrupt and oppressive system!

The revolution will be televised: weekdays at noon on Food Network.

This post, governor yanked telework for state employees and my office is in chaos , was originally published by Alison Green on Ask a Manager.

A reader writes:

I work for the state government in Virginia, and I oversee a division of 15+ people. We’ve all been teleworking for over two years with great success. The governor took over the state’s telework policy enforcement and required employees to come back by July 5 unless there’s an approved telework request for each employee. It’s a huge mess.

The deadlines must be met. If a telework policy doesn’t exist by a June deadline, employees who don’t have one will be expected to work a five-day week in person.

I’m facing some serious, possibly legal, challenges of my own:

• The bulk of my staff never had office space. Empty office space was rare pre-pandemic, but we expanded our workforce during COVID-19. Now, there’s no space left. Leadership continues to insist that we need to consider bringing office-less people back anyway “even if it’s for part of the week.” My question as to where they’re supposed to work remains unanswered.

• There is a category for ADA and other medical conditions. Leadership asked my staff and me to produce explicit details from doctors as to what medical conditions would put us at risk for in-person work. Although I produced it, my agency head unliterally decided my husband’s potential death wasn’t enough of a justification. I am now uncomfortable this man knows so much information about me as I never would have volunteered it otherwise. Is he bound by confidentiality?

• I feel extremely uncomfortable asking my direct reports for doctor’s notes that will explicitly reveal medical information about them or family members.

• The flowchart that explains the policy and telework categories would make an MBA cry. I spend most of my day trying to interpret and explain it, but the caveats change by the day. I’m sure I’ve misinterpreted some of the information, which will put my employees’ requests at risk.

• Multiple emails have gone out with “additional guidance” that is confusing and causing hundreds of employees to redo their forms. (I’ve redone my form seven times.)

• Field/remote workers are supposedly exempt from the new policy, but it’s not being enforced consistently. There is growing resentment because my field staff will get permanent telework but others won’t, according to their supervisors’ interpretation.

• Leadership is having a hard time “agreeing” with many of the legitimate reasons on these telework forms, such as health conditions and lack of office space, so they’re rejecting the requests. (Rejecting the forms will allow for the deadline to pass, forcing those employees to come back full-time on July 5.)

• We don’t get any notice as to whether our forms have been approved or denied, and we won’t be told the reason for a rejection. We’re beholden to our supervisors to tell us our application status. If we’re denied, we’re supposed to keep reapplying, citing new reasons.

Here’s my question: what do I do if my staff are required to come back even though no office space exists, no parking is available, and/or leadership ignores severe health issues? How much risk am I carrying now that my employees have turned over private medical information against their will? I literally cannot enforce this policy even if I wanted to.

Yeah, this is a clusterfudge created by someone who’s making a political point without any apparent interest in how it will play out in real life.

Bringing people back without any plan for where to put them is absurd. Denying medical exemptions without any interactive dialogue to find workable accommodations is more than absurd; it’s illegal under the federal Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA).

As for what to do … government employment can be very much its own world. It’s not one I have expertise in and so you might get more targeted advice by talking to someone with government experience. But off the top of my head, my thoughts are:

* Write up the exact office space needs for your employees, being specific about numbers, desks, computers, phones, and other equipment, and ask by what date those things will be in place. Consider including a line saying, “Obviously we will not be able to comply with the July 5 return date without space and equipment in place; please let me know what date we can plan around instead. I assume I should put my team’s return plans on hold until we have an approved date for space and equipment.”

* Realistically, what will happen if you all return on July 5 with no work spaces? Are you going to have people milling around the lobby, unable to work? And if so, might it be worth just letting that happen to see if the point is made and it spurs some sort of action? (This doesn’t address the issue of people with medical reasons for why they can’t safely return. It may be your only option anyway.)

* Take some of this to local and state media. (I already forwarded it to a few reporters with your permission.) “Governor yanks telework and demands state employees return with no office space” is an interesting and provocative story that someone will be interested in covering.

* Consider educating your employees about the ADA’s requirement for an interactive dialogue with employees who request medical accommodations, since it sounds like the state is currently violating that part of the law. (Speaking of which, the ADA also requires that employers that gather medical information keep it confidential, so in response to your question about confidentiality — by law they must keep protected medical information separately from regular personnel records and treat it as confidential. They can share info with managers who need info about restrictions on someone’s work duties or info about reasonable accommodations, but those managers are subject to the same confidentiality restrictions. But it sure doesn’t inspire confidence that they haven’t told you, a manager receiving that info, about that requirement.)

* Point out to someone above you that the current lack of interactive dialogue on medical accommodations is violating the law, and ask what to say to employees who point that out themselves.

* If your employees have a union: this is their moment.

But yes, this is ridiculous.

Unboxing and testing a new old stock Record-a-Call Model 675 from 40 years ago! A woodgrain-clad answering machine that uses full-size compact cassette tapes to record messages, which I've paired with a lovely 1979 Deco-Tel Chest Phone. Let's try it out with an XLink Bluetooth adapter on a modern VoIP service!

● LGR links:
https://www.patreon.com/LazyGameReviews
https://www.twitter.com/LazyGameReviews
https://www.facebook.com/LazyGameReviews

● All background music licensed from:
http://www.epidemicsound.com

00:00 Intro to the Record a Call 675
03:16 Background & They Might Be Giants
05:12 New Old Stock Unboxing
10:33 Ooh, Dat Answering Machine
15:28 The 1979 Chestphone
16:45 Testing the XLink Gateway
20:00 Leaving a Message!
21:34 Does the Remote Work?
24:25 Outroduction

#LGR #Retro #Technology

This post, 15 years of Ask a Manager , was originally published by Alison Green on Ask a Manager.

Fifteen years ago this past Saturday, I launched this site. I wasn’t sure if anyone would read it, but I thought I had a few months of posts in me (little did I know the letters you had in you). A decade and a half later, here are some highlights year by year.

In 2007, highlights included:

• an irritating manager reality check
• alternatives to firing
• mob pressure to join coworkers for lunch
• taking criticism gracefully
• my very first set of office holiday party tips (including “drink things in small glasses”)
• the first update the site ever got

In 2008, highlights included:

• candidates who react badly to rejection
• someone taking things too personally
• reality-based management
• what to do when your manager won’t manage
• an interviewer who told you that you were high maintenance and full of yourself
• my very first rant about companies that don’t send rejections

In 2009, highlights included:

• what to do when you disagree with your boss
• beware of the overly nice manager
• how much you can change your manager
• a coworker moonlighting as a sex worker
• whether you can be written up for spitting

In 2010, highlights included:

• combating unhealthy power dynamics during a job search
• a coworker who brushed her hair with a fork
• employer time vs. candidate time
• a boss who thinks you’re on-call day and night
• an employee who hit their boss
• a manager who banned employees from eating lunch together

In 2011, highlights included:

• someone leaving fingernail clippings in your desk
• the boss who kept stealing your lunch
• an interviewer obsessed with anger management
• job ads that don’t list the true qualifications the employer is seeking
• referring to an orgy in your cover letter
• a new hire who wanted to quit and now wants to stay
• the very first Worst Boss of the Year competition

In 2012, highlights included:

• an employee who wouldn’t stop hugging people
• a coworker who used flatulence as a weapon
• pushy dietician who wouldn’t stop harassing a body-builder
• what your interviewer says vs. what they mean
• a husband who emailed his wife’s manager about their joint decision for her to resign
• what it means to “be yourself” in an interview
• ways to appear more authoritative at work
• reasons “do what you love” is not great advice
• a former coworker who wanted to throw a party for some coworkers but not all and have the CEO pay for it

In 2013, highlights included:

• the problem with dream jobs
• how to assert your legal rights at work
• an employee putting magic curses on her coworkers
• how to ask for your old job back
• someone outraged that his employer wanted him to remove an offensive sticker from his truck
• a boss who was always making out with his girlfriend at work

In 2014, highlights included:

• coworkers who heard your roommates having sex while you were on a conference call
• the interview where 20 candidates all had to prepare a meal and entertainment for a whole office
• why interviewers ask about your favorite books or movies
• a manager wants to buy underwear for employees
• how to make your boss adore you
• an update from a reader who didn’t want her coworkers to know she was living off cupcakes from the employee kitchen

In 2015, highlights included:

• an employee who racked up $20,000 in personal charges on their company credit card
• an office sex club
• someone allergic in an office full of dogs
• the boss who thought he was a mayan shaman
• a person who didn’t respect their manager’s college degrees from 20 years ago
• the boss who made threats about the Mafia
• how to stop softening the message as a manager

In 2016, highlights included:

• the coworker who wanted everyone to to call her boyfriend her “master”
• the coworker who stole the spicy food, got sick, and blamed the person whose food they’d stolen (and the update)
• the coworkers who had to share a bed on a business trip
• the interns fired for writing a proposal for a more flexible dress code
• the team that was super into tarot cards, the Secret, and sharing their personal “visions”
• my employee who quit on the spot because her manager wouldn’t let her go to her college graduation
• the boss who threatened to fire people who boss didn’t sign up to be a liver donor for his brother
• the manager who stole an employee’s family heirloom
• whether you have to control your emotions to be professional
• the person whose company wanted to sponsor her for a service dog (and the update)

In 2017, highlights included:

• the person who ghosted his ex and she was about to be his new boss (and the update)
• the person who insulted her boss’s daughter
• a manager who yelled at their intern
• a person who bit their coworker
• how to work with someone you can’t stand
• a great update from someone who managed someone who was terribly harmed by his family

In 2018, highlights included:

• the person whose dad was dating her boss, and they wanted her to go to couples therapy with them
• the coworker who started faking a British accent
• what to do if you hate your job
• the time when Jane lost her mind
• the boss who wouldn’t let an employee born on Leap Year have her birthday off
• the coworker with imposter syndrome who actually did suck at her job
• advice when you’re hypersensitive to criticism
• the launch of the Ask a Manager podcast

In 2019, highlights included:

• the twice-daily mandatory group therapy at work
• the boss who peed in a cup and dumped it in the kitchen sink
• the male coworkers who refused to be alone with women
• the communal candy dish
• using dark humor at work
• the poop barbecue
• the coworkers who made orgasm sounds while others were on the phone
• the cheap-ass rolls

In 2020, highlights included:

• the boss who taped people’s mouths shut during meetings
• the manager who asked candidates their salary expectations and didn’t feel bad about it
• a person who messed up at work and felt ashamed
• the question of whether it’s okay to drink before a presentation
• the intern who signs emails with “stay gold”
• how to make a scene when you need to make a scene
• the manager who named Joseph Stalin “employee of the month”
• and several epic updates: the person blackmailing someone not to take time off for their honeymoon, the employee who kept getting deadnamed by a coworker, and the needy boss who wanted her employee to “adopt” her

In 2021, highlights included:

• the drama after a person who prayed for their coworker’s fiancé’s death wasn’t invited to the wedding
• the employee’s “it’s her or me” ultimatum
• the manager who felt an employee wasn’t respectful enough after the company messed up her paycheck
• professional ways to call BS
• the office with a no-humor policy
• being salaried is a scam
• the person working two full-time remote jobs
• Mortification week

And in 2022 so far (we’re only partway though), highlights included:

• the new hire who showed up isn’t the person who interviewed
• the freak-out over a new phone system with fewer speed dial buttons
• the fake crossing guard, the controversial coat rack, and other abuses of tiny amounts of power
• the person accused of bullying a coworker who wants her to get more of a backbone
• why you shouldn’t trust the answers to “how would you describe your management style?”

New comic!
Today's News:

None whatsoever! None whatsoever.

Click here to go see the bonus panel!

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Others of us will leave behind thousands of comics that will grow ever more offensive with the passage of time.

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The bad news is there is no WAY humans are getting to year 100 million.

Today's News:

I see you have a Star Wars shirt on, so now you must prove to me, a random man, that you’re a real Star Wars fan. I’m going to need you to name all twelve movies, eight models of X-wing, and three of its actors you have harassed so severely they left social media.

What do you mean that you think the movies and Disney+ shows are “pretty fun”? There is no room for moderate opinions when it comes to the puppet space movies. You are either an authentic Star Wars aficionado like me, or you’re a charlatan, trying to co-opt our glamorous image.

Being a Star Wars fan isn’t about loving the movies or appreciating the hard work and artistry that goes into making them. It’s about taking every single change to a movie franchise you liked as a child as a vicious personal attack.

What I’m doing is for the greater good. I’m trying to save Star Wars. Why would you want a BAFTA-winning actor like John Boyega when you could have a different actor, one that doesn’t remind me that society has moved forward and left me behind. Also, while I’m at it, it’s not realistic to have Asian women in space. It is a scientific fact that most people who live in that galaxy far, far away are white men with British accents and haircuts from the ’70s.

You know what really gets my goat? The fact that it’s so easy these days to cyberbully cast members, yet you do nothing. Back in 1999, actors didn’t have Twitter or Instagram profiles, so I had to make do with mailing hateful letters to Jake Lloyd (the child that single-handedly ruined The Phantom Menace with his performance as Anakin Skywalker). The money I spent on postage alone nearly ruined me.

What’s that? How can I describe myself as a Star Wars fan when I seem to hate everything about the films? The same way I can describe myself as a straight man even though I hate women. I have dedicated my life to developing an encyclopedic knowledge of all Star Wars media and ephemera. And not just the movies, I’ve watched the Ewoks animated series that ruined the franchise, collected the special edition re-releases that ruined the franchise, and played the Angry Birds’ Star Wars game that ruined the franchise.

What do you mean I should write my own movie if I am so sure of the creative choices that need to be made? Have you seen how artists are treated these days? I don’t want to risk getting threats and harassment from psychopaths on the internet. No thank you. I can’t believe you have such disregard for the safety of the stranger accosting you for liking a movie in the wrong way.

I’m not ruining this party; you’re ruining this party the same way that Kelly Marie Tran ruined The Last Jedi. If you think this is bad, you should see how I act when I’m hiding behind my fake profile of Raptors88—I mean, LoganJohn92—I mean, never mind. I don’t have any fake profiles.

Anyway, now that we’ve established a mutual interest, would you like to go on a date with me?

“For many open positions, employees would interview a ‘diverse’ candidate—the bank’s [Wells Fargo’s] term for a woman or person of color—in keeping with the bank’s yearslong informal policy. But Mr. Bruno noticed that often, the so-called diverse candidate would be interviewed for a job that had already been promised to someone else.” — New York Times, 5/19/22

Dear woman/non-white job applicant,

Thank you for your interest in our company. We didn’t think that someone like yourself would know about us or what we do, so it’s exciting to receive your application.

You may have read on our website that we prioritize diversity in our hiring practices, and that is 100% something that we would like you to believe. We know that talking about diversity, equity, and inclusion makes people feel positive about a company, and we’d like them to feel that way about us.

At our company, we are always on the lookout for top-tier candidates, typically people we already know or are related to someone who works here. That’s why it’s so impressive that your résumé made its way to us, and why we feel as if we should schedule an interview with you. We really don’t know how you did it.

To prepare for this interview, we’re providing a few questions for you to review:

• What makes you the best candidate for this role?
• What would make us select you over, say, our boss’s nephew, Eric?
• Are you related to anyone who may have been in a fraternity with our boss, and if not, why not?
• On a scale of 1 to 10, how mad would you be to find out we already gave this job to Eric?
• What if we told you that Eric’s family has a sweet boat?
• What is your boat situation, and if you don’t have one, why not?
• If it ever came to light that we already gave this job to Eric before even talking to you, would you snitch?
• So, you know we already gave this job to Eric, right?

Just some classic, standard interview questions. Actually, during the process of asking those questions, we realized that the job you’d be interviewing for is below a certain salary threshold, which our policies say we don’t need to consider diverse candidates for. Sorry about that!

It’s just that employees in these lower-paid jobs don’t even have their photos on our website, so you can see why it just makes sense to go with Eric. Plus, he’s already into day three of working here.

Of course, if you ever do make it to where you’re applying for an executive level position, definitely get in touch. We’d love for your face to let people know how diverse we are.

Good luck with your career!

Dear Valued Colleagues,

It gives me no pleasure to deliver you this news, but I am sorry to say that, due to a variety of factors, including the continued economic fallout from COVID, the ever-increasing popularity of online shopping, and the lingering devastation from the attack by a giant spider-like creature in 1985, the Starcourt Mall of Hawkins, Indiana, is shutting its doors.

Trust me when I say that no one is more upset about this news than I am. This closure is not at all a reflection of unsatisfactory work from our many talented employees. Other than our collective failure—also in 1985—to notice that our mall was actually a front for devious Soviet-backed experiments involving an alternate dimension filled with scary monsters, the work has been nothing short of exemplary. But our revenues had already been declining even before the pandemic forced us to close temporarily in 2020, and our finances have simply not been able to recover since then.

The more I think about it, the more surprised I am that we ever made it past 1985 in the first place, what with the Soviet Union thing and the giant spider-like creature attack and the massive fire and the local bully dying spectacularly in our atrium. But, hey, it was the ’80s. People loved malls.

We will provide you with more details on the closure as soon as we figure out who owns Starcourt these days. We know the federal government sold it to Larry Bird shortly after seizing it from the Soviets and realizing that, despite all the trauma and death and horrifying interdimensional creatures that had stemmed from this place, several Hawkins residents still wanted us to repair all the fire damage and reopen the mall so they could continue having access to Hot Dog on a Stick. However, no one has heard anything from Mr. Bird since 1997, and the notice we received saying the mall had to close down indefinitely was just signed by “Heptagon Inc.”

I thought about looking into Heptagon more, but it seems as if every time someone in Hawkins does something like that, many teenagers end up disappearing, so I’m just hoping they respond to my politely worded email soon.

Anyway, let’s not focus on the negatives right now. There will be plenty of time later to argue over whether we should have been better prepared for the impact of the pandemic, or more proactive about investing in online shopping, or more effective at covering up that time when the Soviet military officials who were secretly working here briefly endangered the life of a ten-year-old girl.

Instead, let’s focus on the positives. Like the fact that, after all these years, Scoops Ahoy remains the seventeenth most popular ice cream shop in Indiana. Or that our Sam Goody store was one of the last five to remain open throughout the entire Midwest. Or that none of us were seriously injured in the giant spider-like creature attack—unless you count devastating emotional scars, but, honestly, who cares about those. Not our healthcare provider, that’s for sure.

Speaking of health care, if anyone is interested in a solid new job lead, I have it on good authority that Hawkins National Laboratory will be reopening and looking to hire again very soon. The group of intimidating bald men who cornered me in the Starcourt parking garage last night wanted me to stress that the lab will be solely focused on developing vaccines and treatments for any new COVID variants we may encounter moving forward. Also, if anyone hears any chatter about children with telekinetic powers or rabid doglike beasts with jaws that can tear off a human face in seconds, rest assured that this is all part of the normal scientific process.

Thanks again for your hard work, and please feel free to grab some complimentary Scoops Ahoy ice cream on your way out of Starcourt. It’s probably the closest thing any of us will get to a severance package.

Sincerely,
Steve Harrington
Starcourt Mall Senior Manager

The truth comes out, via mind snowboarding and spelling, obviously. And the fight for the Ultimate Cowlick begins!

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A few days ago, I launched Microsoft’s Edge browser to check some things that I specifically use it for. I was greeted by the dialog that we’ve probably all seen by now, the one that suggests you switch to Microsoft’s suggested settings. Of course, the box to switch is pre-selected for you. It’s easy enough to dismiss, as I’ve done dozens of times at this point.

But this time, I didn’t think, and I just clicked apply. I immediately realized my mistake, went into Edge settings, and changed by default search engine back to Google. Not thinking about it, I later clicked on a link in Slack, and sure enough, my default browser had been changed to Edge. There was never any dialog box to specifically change it, as there would be if any other browser wanted to become the default. And then, I had to go through Windows 11’s nightmarish settings to turn my default browser back to Vivaldi.

I don’t even like Vivaldi. It’s a buggy mess, despite being a very clean experience. But I’ll take it any day over Edge. And after having to switch my browser back, I realized, Microsoft should really be doing a better job of this.

That’s not all that’s wrong with Microsoft Edge. The browser is a faint echo of what it was once promised to be. Now it’s designed as a way to trick you into adopting Microsoft services and a way to spam you with content you don’t want to see.

A brief history of Microsoft Edge

When Microsoft revamped Edge from Google’s open-source Chromium, it wasn’t the first time that the Redmond firm promised that the browser would be good. When Windows 10 was first being announced, it was to come with a brand-new browser, which was only known as Project Spartan at the time. Spartan was going to have innovative new features like the ability to use a pen to write on webpages and save them.

It’s pretty clear where that all headed. Spartan became Edge, a browser that was built on Microsoft’s own EdgeHTML engine. The company did its best to keep up with web standards, but there was always an issue that Edge couldn’t be updated unless Windows was getting a feature update. While Chrome was getting updated every six weeks, Edge got updated every six months. On top of that, Chrome is so dominant when it comes to usage share that the internet is just built for it.

Edge never picked up steam, despite Microsoft continuously trying to improve it. One day, someone from the Edge team asked me what would need to happen for me to use their browser. I jokingly replied that they’d have to turn it into Chrome, the browser I was using at the time.

As it turned out, the team had something similar in mind. Microsoft Edge was to be rebuilt from Chromium, and fans of the company’s products rejoiced. It was an exciting time. Finally, Microsoft fans would have a decent browser to use without having to go to Google. Moreover, Edge was also coming to macOS, iOS, Android, and even Linux, so you’d be able to sync your browsing history to all of your devices.

When it first launched in Canary and Dev channels, it was good, really good. The browser seamlessly imported your history, passwords, and more from Chrome, and then it was just a clean experience. Sure, Microsoft set the default browser to Bing, but you could change it, and that was to be expected, right?

After announcing Edge Chromium in December 2018, it was generally available on January 15, 2020. It was missing key features, such as history sync, something that’s basic for Chrome users. Eventually, all of these features arrived.

Despite delays to core features, it did seem like Microsoft was on the right track toward a great browser. The only problem was that it really wasn’t usable. If you can’t sync your history between devices, any sane person would stick with Chrome until you can.

Edge now exists as a means to push Bing and other Microsoft services

Bing is a bad search engine. I consistently find better results on Google, and I’m pretty sure that exactly no one is tailoring their SEO for Bing. It simply doesn’t have enough users. It’s kind of the same problem that the old Edge has. The web is built around Google now.

The problem is that Bing powers a lot of Microsoft’s efforts, not just web searches from Bing.com. That means that despite the fact that so few people use it that you’d expect for it to be killed off, Microsoft actually does care quite a bit about it.

I, however, would prefer it if I could never see Bing again. Every single time I see a Bing search page, it’s by accident. It means I forgot to change the default search in some browser I’m using. And Microsoft actively tries to push me to use it.

For example, I opened with that story about how Edge occasionally just tosses up a pop-up to tell you to use recommended settings. That pop-up is misleading too, and it makes Edge feel more like malware than anything else. It’s just saying that your settings have somehow been changed from what’s recommended and that it’s a problem you should fix.

And of course, if you change your default search engine, that’s one of the settings that won’t sync. This is behavior that I’d expect, and I’m not particularly mad about it on its own. But this is cumulative. It’s on top of a whole bunch of other stuff that feels like cheap tricks to get you to use Bing.

Microsoft has always been bad with cheap tricks

The problem here is that Microsoft doesn’t realize how bad of a user experience it’s providing. The people that want to use Bing most likely are already, and the ones that don’t are just going to get annoyed when Edge tricks them into using it.

Let’s turn the clock back a bit. Windows RT was a version of Windows 8 that ran on Arm processors, but you could only run apps from the Store. Unfortunately, Microsoft didn’t communicate this very well, and Windows RT looked exactly like regular Windows, so you’d go and buy a Surface RT, and then try to install Chrome – which said it would run on Windows 7 or higher – and it didn’t work. That’s a ‘gotcha moment’.

Fast forward a bit to the next time that Microsoft wanted to force everyone to use Store apps, with Windows 10 S. The big difference was that you’d be able to pay to upgrade from Windows 10 S to Windows 10 Pro, giving you an out. Of course, that makes for a terrible experience for consumers, when they buy a premium PC like the Surface Laptop for a thousand dollars, only to find out when they get home that they have to pay another $100 to install the apps that they want. That’s a gotcha moment.

Tricking you into switching your default browser is another gotcha moment. There’s no one that goes through that and comes out on the other end grateful that they ended up using Bing.

The new tab page is a disgusting mess

One of the reasons I choose Vivaldi despite how buggy it is is that the new page can have almost nothing on it. That’s what I want. The new tab page in Edge is so bad that it almost gives me a headache. And yes, you can customize it, but I don’t have the time to do that on every new PC, nor should I have to.

At the top is a search bar, powered by Bing, as you’d guess. Below are shortcuts to frequently viewed websites, which is fine.

We have @vivaldibrowser and @MicrosoftEdge

Which new tab page is better? More peaceful? Pleasant? Less disruptive to your FLOW? pic.twitter.com/AZn3Zs9Mpj

— Richard Woods (@TheRichWoods) October 6, 2021

Below that is what basically feels like spam. Labeled as “My Feed”, it’s a bunch of stuff that I wouldn’t care about in a million years, such as headlines about Rihanna’s child, what Britney Spears posted on Instagram, football news, and more. There are also ads with headlines like, “Is a Recession Coming? 5 Things To Do ASAP”, and frankly, it blends right in with the quality of content I’m seeing natively.

The thing is, even if the content was relevant, I wouldn’t want to see any of that. Why would anyone want a busy, noisy new tab page? I don’t know about you, but when I click that ‘+’ icon to open a new tab, I have a pretty good idea of what I want to do with it. I don’t need suggestions.

While I look at the ads and the headlines, it feels like just another way for Microsoft to monetize its browser instead of actually making it a good experience. The problem is that if you sacrifice a good experience in the name of monetization, no one will use it. So you lose out on the experience and the monetization along with it.

Syncing is slow

I’m something of a rare use case because I’m activating a new Windows PC just about every week. That means that I’m setting up a browser. The old joke for Internet Explorer, and later Edge, was that it’s a Chrome installer. And aside from the year or so that I used it as a default browser before I couldn’t take it anymore, one of the first things I do on a new PC is use Edge to download a new browser.

Let me put it this way. When I set up a new PC, I can open Edge, download Vivaldi, sign in to Vivaldi, and have all of my passwords and favorites sync in Vivaldi long before any of them appear in Microsoft Edge. Edge simply isn’t very good at syncing. Oh, and that amount of time doesn’t include the 10-second animation you have to go through just to open Edge for the first time.

Also, sometimes there are bugs in syncing. I had an issue once with Edge where every time I signed in, it switched the browser to light mode, and I’d have to change it to the system setting. This was eventually resolved, but at the time, no matter how many times I’d change the setting, it would still be changed back on a new PC. This went on for months and months.

That’s just one example of several, and if it was just that one bug that got fixed, I wouldn’t even mention it. But it’s not, and syncing is that important in a modern browser in this multi-device world.

Edge was supposed to be good, and some things are good

Microsoft Edge was supposed to bring balance to the force, so to speak. If you’re a Microsoft fan, you’re probably not much of a Google fan, so basically getting Chrome but with Microsoft services seemed perfect.

The team started out on such a good track too. Everything was seamless. When opening Edge Chromium, you’d get a simple message asking if you wanted to import your things from Chrome, and once you did, you could quite literally pick up in Edge where you left off in Chrome. It was great. But Microsoft did what Microsoft does; it continued to add new features instead of improving the features that actually matter.

Some things are still good though.

Microsoft Edge is the only Chromium browser that works natively on Arm

If you use Windows on Arm, then you know that your choice in decent browsers is limited. While Windows 11 can emulate any x64 app on an ARM64 processor, you’ll probably want a browser that runs natively. For that, your only choices are Edge and Firefox.

As a matter of fact, Google does indeed have Chrome ready to go, and has for years. It just hasn’t released it.

Edge still has excellent inking features

One cool thing about Microsoft Edge is inking, specifically for PDFs. When a company sends me an NDA or a loan agreement, I just open it in Edge, sign it with that PC’s pen, save it, and send it back. It’s fantastic.

Of course, you can do more, such as highlighting and stuff. It’s just nice to have a simple, easy, and free way to write on PDFs.

Microsoft needs to do better

I want Microsoft Edge to be good. I really do. Like I said earlier, I set up a new Windows PC almost every week. I don’t want to install extra software if I don’t have to.

I currently use Vivaldi. There was a bug for months where I’d try to type something in the URL bar, and it would just repopulate with the existing URL. It was infuriating. Autofill URLs never seem to be quite right. Tab management seems to have a bug in it right now where you have to pull tabs away from the window just to split them away from the main window.

But it’s still better than Edge. Microsoft likes to talk about your “flow”. You know, that’s when you’re doing something on your PC and you’re just in your groove. That can be when doing anything. You’re passionate about something, you’re creating it, and you’re just in the zone. The idea is that the Redmond firm wants to create products that help keep you in your flow, not distract from it.

Microsoft Edge distracts from your flow. It’s a bad browser, which is a shame, because it should, and totally could be good. All Microsoft would have to do is work on improving existing features instead of adding useless new ones, and stop with the cheap tricks to get people to use their services like Bing. Unfortunately, those things are unlikely. It’s very much Microsoft’s culture to launch new features instead of improving the core features, and the monetization angle is always going to be a key component of how Microsoft operates. Other companies might say that providing a great experience would lead to monetization, but that’s not how this is going to go.

The post Hey Microsoft, it’s time to make a better web browser appeared first on XDA.

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