Theasp

Double Stuffed Bacon Oreo (via McKellister)

 

At this point we are quite confident that public The Old Reader will be available in the future, now with a proper team running it.

More details later this week.
Sorry about Monday. Again.

A Subway "sandwich artist" admitted today to putting his penis on the store's sandwich bread and posting the photo on Instagram.

The bombshell comes after HuffPost Weird News received several photos posted by two men in Columbus, Ohio, who work for the restaurant chain. Their Twitter and Instagram pages are festooned with photos of their exploits.

In several photos, Subway's signature bread is shaped into penises.

One of the men, Cameron Boggs, admitted on Instagram that "today at work I froze my pee" in a water bottle.

Boggs posted -- and later deleted -- the most incriminating photo, which depicts a man rubbing his genitalia on foot-long bread. It was posted on Instagram by username "weedpriest" with a caption that reads, "My name is @ianjett and I will be your sandwich artist today."

In an exclusive interview with HuffPost Weird News, Ian Jett copped to defiling the footlong, but denied doing the dirty deed at work.

"I would never do that at work -- it was at home," he said. "This isn't something I'd ever do at Subway. It was totally a joke."

Boggs' other photo shows a water bottle full of a yellow substance that he describes as urine. Though you can't tell from the photo whether the frozen urine is inside a Subway restaurant, Boggs says it was.

Store employees confirmed that Boggs and Jett currently work at the Subway location at Tuttle Crossing Boulevard in Columbus. The chain's corporate office didn't return calls for comment by press time.

The anonymous tipster who sent in the photos was horrified by the pair's handiwork.

"I saw the frozen piss picture and thought, 'What is this guy doing?'" the tipster said. "Then came the penis picture. They're stupid enough for doing this in the first place, but then to post it to the world? It was a dumb move.

"I didn't send these to be vindictive," he added, "But something needs to be done. It's disgusting."

He said he turned in the photos after reading about another case of tainted food on HuffPost Weird News last week. Giusepp Scire, owner of Jersey Joe's Pizzeria in San Diego, denied on Thursday that he masturbated in the eatery's kitchen, an act that was reportedly caught on security footage by users on 4Chan.

A picture posted last week clearly shows a man with white hair, handling his pepperoni in what appears to be a pizza kitchen, but Scire said he was the victim of disgruntled ex-employees' pranks.

In June, a Taco Bell employee became instantly infamous and was fired after he posted a picture of himself licking a stack of taco shells -- at work -- online. Taco Bell apologized and noted that the employee didn't intend to harm anyone by appearing to salivate all over the shells.




Source

WTF is with these people doing gross things to food?

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Sweet mother of all that is right with the automotive world, this car shipping video is terrifying.

Read more...

[video]

During a broadcast, reporter Siobhan Riley of ABC affiliate WJRT-TV accidentally drew the shape of a penis on a map of Saginaw, Michigan.

video via Rand0mD0nkeys

via Chris Moody, Huffington Post

Google Reader was shut down. Luckily Google Takeout allowed you to download all of your data before the shut it down. I did that. I wanted to extract all the URLs to the articles I starred in order to post them on this blog… maybe.

Here’s how I did it. First, take a look at the file starred.json.

    (setq starred-items (with-current-buffer "starred.json (Google Reader-takeout.zip)"
			  (goto-char (point-min))
			  (json-read)))
    (mapcar (lambda (item) (car item)) starred-items)
    ⇒ (items direction updated author title id)

I’m interested in items, which happens to be an array. Let’s see what each item contains.

    (mapcar (lambda (item) (car item))
            (aref (cdr (assoc-string "items" starred-items)) 0))
    ⇒ (origin annotations comments author content replies alternate updated published title categories id timestampUsec crawlTimeMsec)

As it happens, the URL I’m interested in is part of alternate. Let’s make sure there’s always exactly one entry:

    (mapc (lambda (item)
	    (when (not (= 1 (length (cdr (assoc-string "alternate" item)))))
	      (error "%S" item)))
	  (cdr (assoc-string "items" starred-items)))

Phew! Let’s produce a first list of URLs and the respective titles:

    (mapc (lambda (item)
	    (let ((href (cdr (assoc-string "href"
					   (aref (cdr (assoc-string "alternate" item)) 0))))
		  (title (cdr (assoc-string "title" item))))
	      (insert (format "* [%s %s]\n" href title))))
	  (cdr (assoc-string "items" starred-items)))

I hate feedproxy URLs and so I absolutely wanted to get rid of all the URLs starting with http://feedproxy.google.com/. This required a bit more code since neither url-retrieve-synchronously nor url-retrieve do exactly what I want.

    (defun redirection-target (url)
      (save-match-data
	(let ((url-request-method "HEAD")
	      (retrieval-done nil)
	      (spinner "-\|/")
	      (n 0))
	  (url-retrieve url
			(lambda (status &rest ignore)
			  (setq retrieval-done t
				url (plist-get status :redirect)
				url (replace-regexp-in-string "blogspot\\.ch" "blogspot.com" url)
				url (replace-regexp-in-string "\\?utm.*" "" url))))
	  (while (not retrieval-done)
	    (sit-for 1)
	    (message "Waiting... %c" (aref spinner (setq n (mod (1+ n) (length spinner))))))
	  url)))

Now I can run the following search an replace operation in the buffer where I generated my list:

    (while (re-search-forward "http://feedproxy\\.google\\.com/\\S-+" nil t)
      (replace-match (redirection-target (match-string 0))))

Phew, thank you, Emacs!

Tags: Emacs

You can't resist looking, can you?


Comic link!

or if you prefer the Tapastic experience, you can find the comic here.

This post doesn’t have anything to do with the title.  It’s not even a real post.  It’s just an update to tell you that my friend Maile drove me to have my surgery tubes removed today, and then my doctor forced her to pin me to the table so that I wouldn’t punch him when he yanked the tubes out of my stomach.  And Maile looked at both of us for a second to see if he was joking and he super wasn’t, so she shrugged and totally pinned me to the table.  This is the sign of a good friend.  Or a terrible one.  Maybe both.

Then the doctor unstitched me and yanked, and it felt like if you’d accidentally gotten a jump-rope wrapped around your liver.  Or like if I was a one of those dolls that talks when you pull the string on her back.  And the thing that I said was: “Ughaaah.”  Which equates to “So now I know what a yo-yo feels like and also why people want to punch you.”

Also, there was butthole art all over the wall from Debra Messing, and there was also an art display of healthy versus unhealthy assholes.  (The literal ones.  Not the figurative ones.)  But it sort of made sense because my doctor just borrows the office from the rectal surgeon who works there.  I didn’t even notice the assholes until we were leaving and Maile thought that was weird, but I think it was weirder that she was so eager to pin me to the table as someone practiced battlefield style, bite-down-on-this-bullet sort of medicine on me.

Then my doctor started talking about catacombs and corpses and he closed by telling us that he would probably die soon but he felt blessed about it because we were all doomed and that the end times were possibly near.  He said it very cheerfully though.  The man has a hell of a bedside manner.  As we were driving home Maile said, “This shit could only happen to you.  It’s like you manifested the exact kind of crazy, fantastic doctor to fit your life.  I would never believe it if I weren’t there.”  And, yes, that’s sort of how my whole life goes.

PS.  I took a picture of the butt-hole art and I wanted to link to the artist, but when you google “Debra Messing Butthole” you really don’t get what you think you’re going to get.  Or you get exactly what you think you’re going to get if you’re interested in pictures of Debra Messing’s butthole.  Which I wasn’t, but I understand why google would be confused.  This time it’s on me, Google.  I asked for too much.

Doghouse Diaries

Totoro from the 1988 Japanese classic animation as your bed or sofa: Totoro Design Bigsofa 2.7x1.7m Totoro Bed Totoro Double Bed Totoro Sleeping Bag