John Paul Leon ~ High Contrast gallery of  Excellence 

Loïc Locatelli Kournwsky.

Erotically charged illustrations by Loïc Locatelli Kournwsky:

Loïc Locatelli Kournwsky: Tumblr

Paris Hilton stopped by VH1 to talk about her upcoming album but she also told us all about her love for animals and Honey Boo Boo. Because of her busy travel schedule (you know, DJing in Ibiza), Hilton has very little time to watch television. However, she did admit that she loves TLC’s hit series, Here Comes Honey Boo Boo. “She’s like a 40-year-old woman inside a little girl’s body,” Hilton says of the young star. “The things she says is hilarious.”

Hilton also reveals that her love for animals means taking care of 35(!) pets. She lists off a number of them and we could barely keep up. Did you catch all of that?!

Whew, that’s a lot!

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[Photo: Getty; GIFs: Stacy Lambe/VH1]

So, this is what you’ll see if you visit Whitehouse.gov right now. Sigh.

related: Governor of California to State Senate: “Get Stuffed.”

extra credit: John Boehner’s Shutdown [nytimes.com]

maxwittert:

Jean & Scott, episode 3

Check out past episodes here:

Episode 1

Episode 2

(by Max Wittert, 2013)

If you didn't immediately leap off the nearest building upon learning that teen mom Farrah Abraham earned a $1 million payday for opening her back door to porn star James Deen in her first professionally produced "sex tape," you'll be glad to know that life isn't quite that unfair just yet.

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If the governments of the world have somehow managed to put all their differences aside and work together as a team to cover up UFO visitations, who will benefit most from ending this conspiracy? Apparently, according to one UFOlogist, lawyers.

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Ryan Duggan just released a new version of his hilarious “Skatebutt” art print. It’s a 12″ x 16″ screenprint, has an edition of 100, and costs $20. Visit his shop.

Last night, Tina Fey opened Saturday Night Live's 39th season with musical guest Arcade Fire. One of the episode's highlights was this Girls-spoofing digital short that doesn't fall into the easy trap of unnecessary meanness, but rather handily skewers the major characters' self-absorbed reality, thanks to the introduction of a new Girl, Albanian refugee Blerta. Highly recommended.

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Every Movie Poster that Saul Bass Ever Made (all are here)

Great news! If you've always wanted to have sexual intercourse with a cold, lifeless replica of Teen Mom Farrah Abraham's genitals, YOUR TIME IS NEAR. Abraham had a professional cast made of her naked body and will be releasing a line of Farrah-Abraham's-genitals-shaped novelties in early 2014. No shame in that game, y'all. You do you.

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This IS happening!

It’s actually more of a Alex Maleev story.  we were at a New York comic book show, not the one that is coming up, and Alex, oeming, David Mack and myself were all in a row signing our little hearts away. it was actually one of my very first big big signings where more people showed up than I was used to in my independent days.

 behind us was a white curtain and on the other side of the curtain were a bunch of media guests including Richard Hatch from Battle Star Galactica and right behind me was Lou Ferrigno.  I don’t know this man but I had witnessed him being a bit of a cranky pants at other shows.

 what I didn’t know was that every time Lou was about to take a picture with a fan Alex would photo bomb the picture by sticking his head through my part of the curtain. so Alex’s Bulgarian floating head was showing up in every one of these pictures.

 I don’t know how long this was going on for but eventually lou violently ripped open the curtain and barked at the back of my head: STOP IT!!

 I wasn’t facing him so all I saw was 100 or so people facing me stumble backwards in complete horror . I turned around and the Incredible Hulk is standing over me fuming.

Alex with an almost cat like quality crawled under his table as he lit a cigarette and took off.

 Lou saw that it wasn’t me who he was angry at and after a moment closed the curtain with some frustration.

 that was one…

 one time I was in Chicago and Matt Wagner and I got on an elevator that Lou happened to step on as well.  as the elevator doors were about to close an old lady got on the elevator. she was unaware that she was standing too close to be the elevator doors and they wouldn’t close. because lou is somewhat deaf he sometimes talks louder than he might mean to.  frustratingly he barks: GET AWAY FROM THE DOOR!!

 the old lady jumps out of her skin and stumbles out of the elevator and the doors close. Matt and I are standing across each other with a quietly fuming Lou. it’s hard to describe the tension in the elevator as both of us are trying not to laugh at the weird situation. because for some reason Lou still looked like he wanted to beat up somebody

 but all of that comes to a magical moment where my then nine-month-old daughter Olivia is in her baby carriage at the Toronto show as we are checking in. lou sees our adorable baby and comes up to her and tries to tickle her and she for the first time ever in her entire life SLAPS his hand as hard as she can.

my daughter slapped the hulk.

 I’m sure he’s a lovely man. but every time I have had any interaction with them he has been very testy or annoyed by one of my friends or being slapped by my child.

Kirby’s Heroes 

Here’s former HSOTD and the Queen Mother of the Turbans Emma Joy Kitchener and her Alfred Hitchcock-looking ass husband Julian Fellows, the creator of Downton Abbey, at last night’s Emmys. Duchess Kate and the other basic bitches of the court need to save this picture on their iPhones as inspiration, because this is the way a true regal lady does glamour.

Maybe it’s because I’ve been in Z Gallerie way too many times (the promise of endless leopard print pillows draws me in), but she looks like she’s wearing Z Gallerie: THE OUTFIT! That necklace used to be a black chandelier, that lace part used to be a really slutty table runner and that bottom part used to be a bedspread. Emma Joy looks like a royal lady who lost her fortune and was forced to make money by turning her manor into a brothel. That look is very accidental madam.

And here’s a million more looks from last night’s Death & Dancing Extravaganza. Kerry Washington looks like a slice of quinceanera cake with extra frosting flowers and January Jones ripped the dusty drapes off the window in some old lady’s bedroom.

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