Shared posts

25 Mar 18:07

Is Aaron Hernandez Good At Murder? A Deadspin Debate

by Albert Burneko

Earlier today, Diana published a thoughtful look at how Aaron Hernandez's well documented recklessness and stupidity likely will not stop him from getting away with murder . The seed of that post was an internal debate among Deadspin staff about whether Aaron Hernandez is good or bad at murder, and what it means to be "good" or "bad" at murder.

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24 Mar 17:30

How To Eat At A Fancy Restaurant As Though You Belong There

by Miserable Shitehawk

I get it. Your favorite restaurant is Big Chuck's Grilled Meat Wagon, parked between The Noodle Truck and The Taco Truck down at the daily lunchtime curbside bazaar of food trucks. Fine. I, too, love Big Chuck's selection of grilled meats. He's got some quality meats down there on the wagon, no one is denying that.

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24 Mar 18:52

The bracket for the 2015 Name of the Year tournament has been released.

by Barry Petchesky

The bracket for the 2015 Name of the Year tournament has been released. We are ecstatic. Drew and Marchman will go through the contenders in next week's episode of the Deadcast. [NOTY]

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23 Mar 20:37

Don't Coat Your Innards With Space Oil To Conserve Ketchup

by Albert Burneko
Krankota

Ha!

You know how there's always a little bit of ketchup that you never quite get out of the bottle? It coats the inside; even if you do the thing where you stand the bottle on its head for 24 hours to let it all ooze down close to the nozzle, some of it never comes out, and goes in the trash.

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23 Mar 20:08

Cute Dog Is So Incredibly Bad At Catching Food

by Tom Ley
Krankota

I'm dying. Laughed so much the entire office came over to watch.

We've seen some good doggies who are bad at catching things before , but none of those doggies have reached the heights of ineptitude that Fritz achieves in this video.

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23 Mar 13:10

Meet The Carolina Butcher, A Crocodile That Walked On Two Legs

by danuproxx
Krankota

NOPE

carolina butcher

Copyright Jorge Gonzales. Open access.


As we dig deeper into our planet’s natural history, we mostly learn that it was a terrifying place to live. Apparently, that was true well before dinosaurs came along, as carnufex carolinensis, or the Carolina Butcher, proves all too effectively.

This particular lizard was 9-feet long, walked on two legs, and ate its way through the Carolinas about 230 million years ago, according to Lindsay Zanno, the assistant professor who came across the Butcher while cataloging fossils for North Carolina State University. The skull of this beast was found nearly a decade ago, but it wasn’t until Zanno hauled it out and discovered this prototype crocodile.

Why aren’t we being chased around by walking crocodiles today? Essentially, this 9-foot monster got eaten by other, bigger dinosaurs as they evolved, leaving behind smaller aquatic croc relatives who evolved into the predators that make avoiding the water in Florida mandatory. So, really, we’ve got at least one reason to be thankful that the dinosaurs were voracious.

23 Mar 07:00

5 Realities of Being the 'True Story' a Movie is Based On

Krankota

This is BONKERS.

By Robert Evans,Lindsey Bennett,Margo Bennett  Published: March 23rd, 2015 
23 Mar 04:00

Wasted Time

Since it sounds like your time spent typing can't possibly be less productive than your time spent not typing, have you tried typing SLOWER?
20 Mar 20:41

Authentic Present

by Reza

auththentic-present

20 Mar 14:17

Madonna Needs A Nap

by Leslie Horn
Krankota

That's Enough, Madonna.

Madonna needs a friend who will grab her by the shoulders and ask the hard questions, like, "Are you sure this is such a good idea?" She has needed a friend like this for many, many years, and no, the help does not count. Sure, I know she has a new album out and all that, but she really needs to drink some tea, chill out, take a nap, and get the fuck out of all our faces.

Read more...

19 Mar 16:40

The Texas Rangers’ New Stadium Food Will Give You A Heart Attack Just Looking At It

by Ryan Harkness
Krankota

wtf, The Ballpark.

uproxx_rangers1

Delaware North


Baseball is America and America is baseball. And because America is all about stuffing its face with deep fried junk, it makes perfect sense that deep fried junk is becoming synonymous with baseball. For far too long, stadiums have been serving up the same old fare: peanuts, crackerjacks, hot dogs, and other crap even my grandpappy was getting bored of. Those days are now over.

And thanks to the mad scientists at Delaware North Companies, the food services group that runs the concessions at Globe Life Park in Arlington, ball games in Texas are about to get way more delicious. Their two new stands, “State Fair” and “Just Bacon” are going above and beyond with the deep-fried insanity.

uproxx_rangers3

Delaware North


“Just Bacon” is more than just bacon. It’s bacon cotton candy, candied bacon coated in cinnamon and chili powder, and maple bacon ale beer. And ‘State Fair’ takes deep fried food to a pornographic level, offering the Fried S’mOreo (pictured at the top of this post): graham cracker breaded marshmallows deep fried and skewered between two deep fried Oreos and drizzled with chocolate sauce and cool whip.

Other deep fried delicacies? Chicken fried corn on the cob in buttermilk batter, deep fried pickles, and macaroni and cheese brisket balls.

uproxx_rangers2

Delaware


Texas Rangers fans have been enjoying a fast food renaissance at their field in the past few years. Last season, Delaware North added a bunch of beautiful nonsense like the Tanaco, a 2-foot taco, and the Choomongous, a 24-inch spicy Korean beef sub named after Shin-Soo Choo.

The Choomongous is the Rangers' 2-ft-long sandwich monstrosity, and @murphreewithanr ate it http://t.co/NPRc6DfxK2 pic.twitter.com/I6IusAJQJf

— Dallas Morning News (@dallasnews) April 17, 2014

But all these pale in comparison the the Arizona Diamondbacks’ Churro Dog, a warm cinnamon churro inside a Long John chocolate glazed donut topped with yogurt, caramel, and chocolate sauce.

If this concession stand arm race continues the way it’s been going, we may have to turn our attention away from concussions in the NFL to heart attacks in MLB.

uproxx_rangers4

Arizona Diamondbacks


18 Mar 14:09

This Fox Was Rescued As A Baby Cub And Now He Thinks He Is A Dog

Krankota

ermagehrd

Todd is the happiest fox in the world.

Meet Todd the fox and his owner, Emma D'Sylva.

Meet Todd the fox and his owner, Emma D'Sylva.

Nick Hands / Newsteam / Via Newsteam

Todd is a tame fox who was rescued as a baby cub when he was four months old and raised as a domestic pet.

Todd is a tame fox who was rescued as a baby cub when he was four months old and raised as a domestic pet.

Nick Hands / Newsteam / Via Newsteam

Nick Hands / Newsteam


View Entire List ›

18 Mar 15:42

What Happens When A 38-Year-Old Man Takes the AP History Test?

by Drew Magary
Krankota

This is pretty awesome.

I never took an AP course in high school. I'm pretty sure it was because I never qualified for it (I went straight B-minuses throughout my high school career), but it was also because I went to school back when taking AP courses wasn't the dire necessity that it is for today's students. According to this article, taking just one AP course now doubles your odds of getting a college degree; according to this other article, "Approximately 85 percent of selective colleges and universities reported that they looked at whether or not a student had taken an AP course to make their admissions decision."

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18 Mar 20:28

Favorite

by Reza

favorite

18 Mar 17:37

How To Bury Your Parents

by Geoffrey Redick
Krankota

This is excellent. And sad.

Your mom is going to die. Your dad is also going to die.

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18 Mar 16:52

This Guy's Terrible Mashups Of Hozier's "Take Me To Church" Are Great

by Samer Kalaf
Krankota

I will never stop laughing

Have you ever listened to a song and felt it was missing that special something? Maybe you thought the tune was excessively cheery, and needed more melancholy wailing from the likes of Hozier, the dour Irish dude whose droning "Take Me to Church" is, somewhat inexplicably, a huge pop hit.

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18 Mar 06:30

thequeenbey: beyoncé screaming at her foot is my new favorite gif

Krankota

I concur.

thequeenbey:

beyoncé screaming at her foot is my new favorite gif

image

13 Mar 20:12

Now There's A Ranch-Dressing Restaurant, So Let's Walk Into The Ocean

by Albert Burneko

Listen. I say the following with a pristine record of support for unhealthful dairy-based coating glops—both as a genre of foodstuffs and in most specific instances—as well as with the firm backing of all available science: Ranch dressing is bad. Bad dressing.

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11 Mar 15:00

Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Tusklessness

by admin@smbc-comics.com

New comic!
Today's News:
Okay, this time new BAHFest day for real!

10 Mar 19:27

Jim Boeheim Is The NCAA’s Favorite Kind Of Shitbag

by Drew Magary
Krankota

Shared entirely for the excellent answer to the Russia Moon Question

Time for your weekly edition of the Deadspin Funbag. Got something on your mind? Email the Funbag. Today, we're covering bowling, moon colonies, giant scorpions, and more.

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11 Mar 11:22

Noted: New Logos for Frisco RoughRiders by Brandiose

by Armin

Who's on First? Roosevelt is!

New Logos for Frisco RoughRiders by Brandiose

(Est. 2003) "The Frisco RoughRiders (short form: 'Riders) are currently the Class AA affiliate of the Texas Rangers major league baseball club. The team plays in the Texas League, assigned to the South Division. Prior to 2003, the franchise was based in Shreveport, Louisiana, and were known as the Shreveport Captains (and, for the 2002 season, the Shreveport SwampDragons). In 2003, they were purchased by Mandalay Entertainment in connection with Tom Hicks, former owner of the Texas Rangers and the Southwest Sports Group. Mandalay Baseball moved them to the North Texas city of Frisco and changed their name to the RoughRiders. They currently play at Dr Pepper Ballpark in Frisco. […] in 2012, Forbes ranked the Rough Riders as the 4th most valuable franchise in Minor League Baseball."

Design by: Brandiose (San Diego, CA)

Opinion/Notes: How does one critique a logo with a jolly Teddy Roosevelt? There is no guidebook for such a thing. The main logo, showing Roosevelt in full swing and gallivanting in pleasure is too much fun. The accompanying wordmark, with an ode to his mustache follows suit. The front-facing Teddy is a little creepy but it's so campy and full of confidence that it works. The one thing I don't like are the "R"s, either as a monogram or on the collar of Teddy, they feel slightly weak and wobbly compared to everything else.

Related Links: RoughRiders press release

Select Quote: The re-imagined identity celebrates one of America's legendary heroes, Teddy Roosevelt, whose famous Rough Riders originated in Texas more than a century ago. Officially known as the 1st United States Volunteer Cavalry, this famous regiment became known as the "Rough Riders" and its members were personally recruited by Teddy throughout the Lone Star State. Many of the Rough Riders were from the areas currently known as the cities of Frisco, Plano and McKinney.

The team's new logo set is highlighted by "Swinging Teddy," an exuberant depiction of the 26th President of the United States. The iconic image of Teddy laughing is captured in the RoughRiders' alternate logo, which shows him donning his famous slouch hat and pince-nez glasses. Stylized "RoughRiders" lettering can be seen through the identity, topped with the Texas star. The double-curl at the bottom of the capital R's in the "Double R" logo and wordmark is inspired by Teddy's celebrated moustache.

New Logos for Frisco RoughRiders by Brandiose
Logo detail.
New Logos for Frisco RoughRiders by Brandiose
Alternate logos.
New Logos for Frisco RoughRiders by Brandiose
Uniforms.
New Logos for Frisco RoughRiders by Brandiose
Uniform detail. So awesome.
Many thanks to our ADVx3 Partners
10 Mar 13:44

Noted: New Logo for ABC KIDS by Hulsbosch

by Armin
Krankota

Love this.

ABCircles

New Logo for ABC KIDS by Hulsbosch

"ABC KIDS TV cares about kids and we value the trust that Australian families place in us to educate and entertain their children, with quality local and international programming that reflects the lives of our audience. ABC Kids is home to many trusted and loved programs including Play School, Giggle and Hoot and Bananas in Pyjamas, creating an imaginative world where preschoolers can learn, play and explore."

Design by: Hulsbosch (Sydney, Australia)

Opinion/Notes: I keep wanting to see Paul Rand's Eye Bee M rebus in this so I think that's a good thing. The old logo was so literal it almost had its own table of contents. With completely different rendering styles for the apple, bee, and carrot and a hallucinogenic-colored ABC logo, it was a complete mess. The new logo is charming and unifies the apple, bee, and carrot in a very charming, simple way. The typography is fine and the ABC logo integration is as good as it can get with parent companies/networks. Overall: cute!

Related Links: N/A

Select Quote: For over 25 years, the ABC for Kids early learning symbols the Apple, the Bee and the Carrot icons have signified Australia's leading preschool brand for quality products and entertainment. These symbols are a revered standard of the ABC preschool brand and importantly a unique heritage stamp for marketing and communication campaigns.

The Hulsbosch creative solution leverages the equity in the symbols and their visual association and successfully brings it to life in a contemporary manner, enabling growth of the ABC KIDS properties and brand in the future.

New Logo for ABC KIDS by Hulsbosch
Logo detail.
New Logo for ABC KIDS by Hulsbosch
Sample guideline pages.
New Logo for ABC KIDS by Hulsbosch
Screen bug.
New Logo for ABC KIDS by Hulsbosch
Product merchandise.
Many thanks to our ADVx3 Partners
10 Mar 20:12

How To Score Weed 

by Leslie Horn

So you want to score some fresh weed, and you are not fortunate enough to live in one of those states that has made the sensible decision to decriminalize it. Congratulations: You're cool, and you've come to the right place (within the wrong place). It's not that hard to score bud with the right amount of finesse. Come with me as I guide you on a keef-paved road to sparking up.

Read more...

10 Mar 14:00

Men Sleeping Quietly And Not Talking Or Bothering Anyone In Western Art History

by Mallory Ortberg
Krankota

"conquistasnoring." I'm dead.

sleepy11

shh nobody move
don't wake him up
he's conquistasnoring

sleepy10

aww look
look at how pretty his mouth is when he doesn't use it for talking

Read more Men Sleeping Quietly And Not Talking Or Bothering Anyone In Western Art History at The Toast.

09 Mar 18:17

Kill That Hoopla

by A dog

Woot! Have you heard someone say this? Woot! (they say). Lordy, lordy.

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06 Mar 15:00

Devin Harris Adorably High-Fives Two Young Fans After Diving For A Loose Ball

by Martin Rickman

NBA players are people too, lest we ever forget that. The latest wonderful example comes from Thursday night’s game between Dallas and Portland.

Mavericks guard Devin Harris dove for a loose ball and crashed into the courtside seats, where he was met by a couple of young fans. As it is sometimes a little scary to have a 6-3, almost-200-pound man barreling into you while you’re trying to enjoy a basketball game, Harris did the universal sign for “everything is okay.” He gave them high fives.

This is the sort of thing that you remember forever if you’re a kid. I have a few stories like that with coaches and players that I hold onto, and I walked away always having a positive memory of a certain game, certain coach or player. It probably wasn’t even a big deal to Harris, who reacted naturally. But to a couple of young basketball fans, that’s a story they’ll tell their friends for years.

This isn’t the first time Harris has crashed into fans diving for a loose ball, either. So maybe he needs to make sure he wears some extra padding or at least stuffs his pockets with stickers and candy in case someone actually gets hurt.

Harris hurt his hand in the loss to the Trailblazers, but not because of the high fives. X-rays were negative.

09 Mar 16:00

The Comment Section For Every Article Ever Written About Breastfeeding

by Nicole Cliffe

Previously: The Comment Section For Every Article Ever Written About Intimate Grooming and Tipping and Recipes and the Third Trimester. Nicole is happy to report that after not being able to breastfeed Kid One, Kid Two is breastfeeding like a champ. LIFE IS A RICH TAPESTRY.

Breast is best.

Your issue sounds like a tongue tie, go get it snipped.

Three pediatricians have examined him and said he doesn't have a tongue tie.

It could be a posterior tongue tie.

It COULD be a lip tie.

It's obviously a tie of SOME kind. Just start snipping things inside his mouth until the situation improves.

Read more The Comment Section For Every Article Ever Written About Breastfeeding at The Toast.

06 Mar 21:15

Fit In

by Reza
Krankota

YAY!

fit-in

06 Mar 20:40

Hark, A Vagrant: Founding Fathers in an Amusement Park




buy this print!

Those Founding Fathers! They are still at it!

I'm going to Germany myself, for a book festival all next week. Details here! Will I see you there? Would the Founding Fathers approve? Yes I think so. Thank you to my new German publishers Zwerchfell!
04 Mar 20:02

No Offense

by Reza

no-offense