never give up on your dreams
never give up on your dreams
Abandoned Victorian Style Greenhouse
Senior English major on a Shakespeare final. (via minininny)
WELL THEY’RE NOT WRONG
How about this, though?
[Editorial Note: This “theory” depends on believing the Romeo and Juliet and Hamlet take place contemporaneously. So, for the sake of argument, let’s all agree that the events of both plays occur in the Spring of 1517 (chosen because of Martin Luther’s 95 Theses, and the Reformational threads that run through Hamlet).]
See, in the Second Quarto and First Folio versions of Romeo and Juliet, a[n extremely minor] character appears with Romeo, Mercutio, and Benvolio at the Capulet’s Party (where, if you recall, Romeo meets Juliet for the first time).
Like Hamlet's Horatio, this Horatio is full of well-worded philosophical advice. He tells Romeo “And to sink in it should you burden love, too great oppression for a tender thing.”
Fig. 1 - Second Quarto Printing
Fig. 2 - First Folio Printing
[The American Shakespeare Center’s Education Blog discusses the likely “real” reasons for Horatio’s presence]
Let’s imagine that Horatio has travelled down from Wittenberg (about 540 miles) to Verona for his Spring Break. He hears about some guys who like to party (because, let’s be honest, besides getting stabbed, partying is Mercutio’s main thing). So, he ends up crashing the Capulet’s ball with them.
He is then on the sidelines as Romeo and Juliet fall in love, Tybalt kills Mercutio, Romeo kills Tybalt, Romeo gets banished, and both lovers are found dead in Juliet’s tomb.
This tragedy fresh in his mind, he returns to Wittenberg at the end of what has turned out to be a decidedly un-radical Spring Break and discovers that his bestie Prince Hamlet is leaving for Elsinore Castle because he’s just gotten news that his father, the King, is dead.
On the trip up (another ~375 miles), Horatio recounts the tragic romance he just witnessed in Verona. He advises (as he is wont to do) Hamlet not to mix love and revenge.
Hamlet takes Horatio’s advice to heart, breaking up with Ophelia so that he can focus is energy on discovering and punishing his father’s killer:
Ay, truly; for the power of beauty will sooner
transform honesty from what it is to a bawd than the
force of honesty can translate beauty into his
likeness: this was sometime a paradox, but now the
time gives it proof. I did love you once.
Ophelia - burdened by the perceived loss of Hamlet’s love and his murder of her father - goes mad and drowns herself.
You see, if Romeo had waited literally a minute and thirty seconds longer (31 iambic pentametrical lines) - he, Juliet, Ophelia (and possibly the rest of the Hamlet characters) would have made it.
* With thanks to roguebelle.
Buncha fuckin nerds in this town.
The Hamratiophelia Conspiracy Theory ftw
Alters the timestamp. Like
DateTime::modify() but works with
Duh. I don’t see what’s so hard about this, @pda.
Of course, it doesn’t actually do what the name says and modify an unmodifiable object at all. So, at least there’s that; PHP didn’t actually go through with its threat.
SUPER EDIT FUN TIME! The following article by someone who worked on this code was pointed out to me on Twitter by @GDMac:
You knew this was coming, right?
Citing the newly-established precedent of corporate-religious exemption, the U.S. Supreme Court ruled Tuesday in favor of JCPenney, upholding the company's right to sacrifice pure-hearted employees in order to assuage the Dread Lord Cthulhu, Bringer of Madness.
The Penney estate, devout cultists and owners of the multibillion-dollar chain of mid-range department stores, joined by CEO Mike Ullman, sued the government in 2012 when new federal employee protections made it illegal for them to hire virgin maidens for the sole purpose of spilling their blood on the Altar of the Cosmos, with the hope that such an offering will prolong the Great Old One's slumber in the sunken city of R'lyeh.
Supreme Court Rules JCPenney Allowed to Sacrifice Employees to Appease Cthulhu [Moonmont Chronicle]
"idris elba as—"
I’m not really into Dilbert, but Wally has always been a bit of a hero to me.
When I say "People are Stupid" I am including myself and the people I'm talking with in "people." We are stupid, just not quite as stupid as slugs.
I'm not sure either, but I too am almost certain.
Perhaps the failures of patriarchy.
Take your canvas bags... Take your canvas baa--ags.
Down to the supermarket.
(or kill yourself, apparently)
(I work in a very popular chocolate shop that also sells ice cream in the summer. It is a particularly busy, hot Saturday. I am serving ice cream. There was a huge line of customers. Suddenly, a customer strolls into the store, leaving her bicycle outside. Eventually, it is her turn.)
Customer: “Finally. I’ll have a hazelnut.”
Me: “Sure, a double or a single?”
Me: “Would you like it in a cone or a tub?”
Customer: “A bag.”
Customer: “A bag.”
(I look at her for a moment)
Me: “I’m sorry, Miss, but the ice cream only comes in a cone or a tub.”
Customer: “Well, I need it in a bag. Do you have a bag?”
(We put chocolate in small transparent bags, but they would definitely not fit an ice cream tub, also there are no lids on the tubs to cover the ice cream.)
Me: “It won’t fit in one of our bags, miss.”
Customer: “Yes, it will. Get one.”
(I protest again, but fetch her bag anyway. I present it to her and show her the size, to prove it won’t fit.)
Me: “See, Miss? It’s too small. The tub won’t fit in there.”
Customer: “Oh, honestly, how do you even have a job? Do you even have a brain?”
(I’m hurt by this comment, and am getting quite angry.)
Me: “Look, it won’t fit; I don’t know what you’d like me to do.”
Customer: “Let me do it, girl.”
(She proceeds to take the full-to-the-brim ice cream tub and squeeze it into the bag sideways, smearing her ice cream all down the sides. I stare at her in disbelief. Ice cream is dripping everywhere.)
Customer: “Was that so hard?”
Me: *still staring* “Would… you like a spoon?”
(She held out the open bag and I dropped in a small plastic spoon with the already nearly melted ice cream. She paid and left. I watched her outside the window as she put her bag of squished ice cream into the child-seat of her bicycle, STRAPPED UP THE SEAT BELT, and cycled away down the road. I stared in disbelief for the rest of the day.)
cars are powered mostly by algae, very little dinosaur.
Hey man everyone knows organics are hard.
I want to believe.
I've seen all these gifs before, but I think the fact that they exist says something about my profession (software engineering).
collection of robots saying “fuck this shit”
Ellis Hamburger, writing for The Verge:
At first, Facebook’s new ephemeral messaging app, Slingshot, feels like yet another Snapchat clone. The free app, available now for iPhone and Android, lets you take a quick photo or video, mark it up with some colorful drawings, caption it with big white text, and then fire it off to a bunch of friends. But then you receive your first message, and you realize this is something completely different.
In Snapchat or any other messaging app, you can view a message as soon as you receive it. But in Slingshot, you can’t view an incoming “shot” until you send a shot back to the sender. “It’s not just about telling your story, it’s about asking others for their story,” says Slingshot designer Joey Flynn. In other words, Slingshot makes you trade a photo of what you’re doing before you can “unlock” the picture of whatever your friend is up to. Huh?
If they give you phones in hell, this is the sort of app that’s on them.