Tim Margis is the director of public safety for Concordia University in Chicago. Er, he was, that is, until a week ago, when he was arrested for ejaculating into the shoe of a female coworker in her campus office.

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captain-cal:

cannabiscrazy:

This is very satisfying

I am entertained for hours.

geeksofdoom:

I was searching for a picture of Molly Ringwald, because it’s her birthday today (HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MOLLY!), when I came across this print by Jason Wright: ‘Breakfast On Arrakis’

So. Much. Win.

15 Brilliant Shower Ideas [mashable]

Previously: Crazy Ideas That Are Borderline Genius

Jackhammer Jesus. All images via Divine Interventions

VICE's recent nunsploitation shoot reminded us about how fun, weird, and totally hot the tension between sex and religion can be. In fact, it inspired us to look into another facet of the interplay between piety and perversion: religious sex toys. 

It's no secret that the sex-toy market in general has seen a boom in the last decade or so. It's a $15 billion industry in the US alone. That’s a lot of rubber wangs and simulated vaginas.

Of course, with the rise in mainstream sex products, the obscure micro-niches of that economy are also growing. If you're the kind of person that only wants to get whipped by a recycled vegan flogger, someone can totally make that happen. Today, thanks to video tutorials, DIY kits, and people with lots of time on their hands, a sex-toy cottage industry has popped up.

The artisanal religious sex toy industry is very much part of this obscure toy sexplosion. Have you heard of the Holy Water Plug? It’s a sex toy that includes two inches of shiny cold metal that you stick down your urethra in the name of Jesus Christ; out of the little cross on the end comes an au naturel sort of holy water. It sounds painful, and I can’t fathom why anyone would pay $84 to stick a pipe down his or her pee-hole, but the fact remains: It exists because somebody wants it. 

There are companies earnestly trying to bring couples closer to God—like Intimacy of Eden or Covenant Spice—that don’t feature any models with their products so Christian couples can remain virtuous while shopping for things to stuff in their holes. And then there’s the fetish scene, whose participants are all for the idea of turning the spiritual into the sexual.

Nigel R. is one of the latter. He has been assisting people in having orthodox-inspired orgasms since 1999. Much like other artisanal adult-toy companies, the majority of Divine Interventions’ silicone products are handcrafted and colored by Nigel himself.

Focusing mainly on Catholic-themed sex toys, Nigel first got the idea for Divine Interventions in college, when he mistook the picture on the box of his roommate’s Jesus nightlight for a dildo. Now his company features products like the Jackhammer Jesus and the Baby Jesus butt plug.
 

Baby Jesus butt plug

In many ways, Divine Interventions gets its kicks from marrying the ultimate binary—sex and religion—into one product. Though the target audience are religious fetishists, a small minority of religious customers have cited using Christian sensual products to improve their sex lives, in turn bringing themselves closer to God.

"I got one email from a reformed Catholic who felt very oppressed growing up in the church, and thought the toys were great and improved her sex life," explained Nigel over the phone from California.

Diving Nun

Nigel’s toys don’t only feature the King of the Jews. There’s also the sacreligious Diving Nun—a phallic-shaped nun that suctions to the wall for use in as many ways as your imagination sees fit. Those lacking the appropriate accessories for their newly obtained silicone nun can pick up some Holy Water lube for the reasonable price of $9.99 (each bottle has been blessed by a priest).

In case you’re wondering, Nigel grew up a member of the Church of England but is now a self-proclaimed atheist. In terms of negative feedback, Nigel says the worst he’s ever gotten was a death threat, as well as a suspect email from someone claiming to be from the Vatican, in which Nigel was accused of violating the copyright of Jesus Christ. “I truly don't understand; our toys don't hurt a soul,” Nigel said. “People really do need to relax when it comes to religion... and our toys can help.”

Buddha's Delight

Nigel is a man that wants every niche—and hole—filled. Unsatisfied with merely catering to Christianity, Nigel branched out into the penis-personifying of other religious figures as well.

“'Baby Jesus butt plug' just sort of rolled off the tongue,” Nigel said. “I knew that I wanted to include figures from Christianity, Judaism, Buddhism, and Hinduism, though the only Hindu and Buddhist pieces are the Shiva Lingam and the Buddha, respectively.” Nigel recently received a request for a Putin look-alike butt plug that he would affectionately call the "Putin-ass" plug.

“We did think about becoming a church, 'The Temple of Divine Interventions,'” said Nigel. “It would certainly be more fun than Scientology.”

@mperason9

If someone had told you 25 years ago that Vanilla Ice would end up in a Kraft Macaroni & Cheese ad, MC Serch would end up with a talk show, and old school hip hop pioneers would end up broke, would you have believed it? Probably.

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Reddit user BrazilianDanny filmed his recently-injured Yorkie, named Kiwi, trying (and failing) to catch a few balls thrown her way. (“She had both knees operated on just 4 months ago,” Kiwi’s owner explains.)

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You probably like bunnies. How about several dozen bunnies?

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Timo the Ragdoll cat tries out his new hammock in this video uploaded by Xiedubbel. Looks like he’s pretty satisfied with it. Here’s a bonus video of Timo checking out a Koi fish pond.

via Tastefully Offensive

BuzzFeedPop explores what the animated series The Simpsons sound like in different countries.

A man is in a coma this afternoon after ingesting a weed cake with his friends for his birthday. Though it is unclear if the weed cake was purely responsible for his comatose state, or if there were other foul issues afoot, nine of his friends were also taken into care for similar symptoms, an "irregular heartbeat" being one of them. One member of his party was left behind and not treated. He is now colloquially known as Weed King. Bow down.

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Family Stuff‘ (translated ‘Jiadang’) is a project which has taken Chinese photographer Huang Qingjun some ten years to pull together.

During that time he’s travelled to 14 different provinces across China photographing rural families alongside everything they own. If you moved all of your world possessions out of your own home, how many do you truly need? How many could you live without?

Qingjun hopes that his series will draw attention to the ferocious speed at which modernisation is impacting rural Chinese families. Sometimes the effect is positive, technology has allowed them to own fridges and TV units but there’s also a negative impact to the changing landscape. Many are being displaced from their homes to make way for high rise cookie-cutter apartments.

The traditional, simple and modest way of life in rural China is certainly an endangered as cheap technology and the ever-pervasive urban sprawl begin to influence and take over.

Via Huang Qingjun

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Not only has NBC been stealthily operating a Starbucks in the Olympics media center, they've been taunting all the other journalists who are forced to drink the only branded coffee available — McDonalds' McCafe.

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In 2011, John Palmer found out from his siblings that his cat really enjoyed being slid across the kitchen floor. It was only natural then, to turn this talent into a rousing game of real life cat curling. While the game isn’t as structured as Olympic Cat Curling, it seems like everyone, especially the kitty, is having fun.

via Cineraria, Daily Picks and Flicks

Step 1

Scotland-based forensic artist Nigel took an empty bottle of high-end Crystal Head Vodka and reconstructed a face — much like he would have with an actual skull — based on it. Nigel thankfully took a series of photos documenting the step-by-step process from empty bottle to creepy reconstructed face.

Step 2

Step 3

Step 4

Step 5

Step 6

images via Crystal Head Vodka

via Cheezburger, Neatorama

Malls that were once active but have since been abandoned ("dead malls") are fascinating relics of greed, consumerism, and our increasingly antiquated analog way of life that required actual motion through space to get the material possessions we don't need, per se, but covet. They're also creepy and kind of sad, if you think about the unrealized dreams of the people to tried to sell you that shit you didn't need. Dead malls are sweeping the nation in that agonizingly slow manner that dead things sweep.

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By now, most of us have forgotten about the iconic skateboarding shoe company from ’90s, Airwalk. Always in search of interesting product selection, Beauty & Youth has decided to tackle one of Airwalk’s signature sneakers, Jim, for their latest collaboration effort. Since this model is reminiscent of simple tennis shoes, the Japanese retailer have wrapped the uppers in white tennis ball-like fabric. Contrasting the colorless sneakers are the green logo details on the side, tongue, and on the insole. Expect to see these Jimtennis kicks in Beauty & Youth from early March. Pre-order is available from Beauty & Youth webshop right now.

Read the rest of Beauty & Youth x Airwalk Jimtennis

© Masa for FreshnessMag, 2014. | Permalink | No comment | Follow us: Facebook | Twitter
Post tags: airwalk, Beauty & Youth

The post Beauty & Youth x Airwalk Jimtennis appeared first on FreshnessMag.

Few brands do camo like the Swoosh and no other model looks as good in the print as the iconic Dunk. This latest collaboration that has leaked its way onto the internet was conjured up by 510 Skateboarding out in Cali and uses brown, green, and tan with hits of orange for the laces with speckling on the contrasting white midsole and a gum sole to give a classic base. The upper is looking to be made up of a durable, rugged canvas with a leather Swoosh overlaid on both sides for subtle bit of depth to the look. The Berkeley-based shop’s 510 Skateboarding  logo appears on the tongue and insole to complete the look. No word yet on availability, but stick with Freshness and we’ll send the latest news your way as soon as we have it.

Read the rest of 510skateboarding x Nike SB Dunk High | Preview

© pmallory for FreshnessMag, 2014. | Permalink | No comment | Follow us: Facebook | Twitter
Post tags: 501skateboarding, Benny Gold, Nike, Nike SB

The post 510skateboarding x Nike SB Dunk High | Preview appeared first on FreshnessMag.

Daily commute with the T-Scooter looks to be a dream. The reason why I say this is that it hooks up a smartphone and updates the rider on the road conditions ahead. Basically it is an electric moped that gives you an intelligent driving experience. The smartphone fits into a handlebar socket and the pre-installed application establishes a data connection with the wireless camera at the rear of the saddle. In essence you get a superior riding experience.

The T-Scooter is a 2014 Red Dot Award: Design Concept Winner

Designer: Chen Kaiwen for Tone Design

-
Yanko Design
Timeless Designs - Explore wonderful concepts from around the world!
Shop CKIE - We are more than just concepts. See what's hot at the CKIE store by Yanko Design!
(The T Ride with iPhone was originally posted on Yanko Design)

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2. Ride the Screen Wave!
3. Hitch a Free Ride

If you were looking for more Bill Murray after his amazing Reddit AMA, here you go: Last night, Charlie Rose aired his full, hour-long discussion with the comedy great. Murray is hilarious, of course, but he's also surprisingly candid and thoughtful.

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Screen Junkies has created a supercut video of Marty McFly and Doc Brown saying each other’s names in the Back to the Future films.

Did you ever notice how often Doc and Marty refer to one another by name? Well, they do.

Last week, I was walking around the Financial District when I found myself staring at the little diner on Pearl Street in amazement. How in the hell had this thing managed to survive into present day New York when you consider the towering skyscrapers surrounding it?

New York has its share of diners, but it’s the stand-alone ones that really fascinate me: one-story restaurants entirely devoted to serving pancakes, hamburgers, and other affordable fare while illogically taking up plots of land worth millions upon millions of dollars.

When I arrived in New York 14 years ago, there were still a decent amount left, like the Cheyenne Diner on 33rd Street:

Picture courtesy Flickr user DrJoolz – Click for more!

Today, it’s a vacant lot, soon to become a 9-story apartment building:

Many other classic New York greasy spoons have bit the dust in the past 20 years, making the stand-alone diner one of the most endangered building types in the city. By my count, there are just five left. If I’ve missed any, let me know!

1) Pearl Street Diner – 212 Pearl Street, Financial District

The Pearl Street Diner opened in the early 1960s at the corner of Pearl and the appropriately diminutive Fletcher Street. It miraculously survived the construction of the 24-story office building behind it, which went up in the early 1970s.

The diner was made by the famous Kullman Dining Car Company, a prefab diner manufacturer founded in 1927.

My favorite bit is the sign, which looks great during the day…

…but at night, makes New York City look like New York City:

A close-up (I really wish the PEARL lettering still lit up):

The diner has been renovated over the years, but little bits of stainless steel are still visible.

2) Market Diner – 572 Eleventh Avenue – Hell’s Kitchen

Of all the places on this list, Market Diner is the one that seems to revel in breaking all the laws of New York City real estate – first, by occupying a massive lot that could easily be used to build a very tall, very expensive highrise…

…and then devoting a large portion of said space to drive-up parking for customers. DRIVE-UP PARKING. IN MANHATTAN. Is there any other place that does this??

It’s almost as if the adjacent highrises are gazing down mockingly at the little diner, completely oblivious to the fact that there’s more New York charm in this one-story eatery than in all of their generic 40+ stories:

The Market Diner opened in 1962 and soon amassed a diverse clientele, from members of the Hell’s Kitchen gang to Frank Sinatra. After closing in 2006, the diner miraculously reopened in 2009 after undergoing a full refurbishment, which added a brown color scheme and an outdoor section where additional parking used to be.

I love the zigzag roof, along with the rounded entrance-way:

I also love the stainless steel Market Diner sign extending off the adjacent building:

Sadly, the interior has been more or less gutted and modernized, but at least the old girl is still standing.

3) Empire Diner – 210 Tenth Avenue – Chelsea

When you think of a classic New York City diner, you think of the Empire.

Built in 1946 by the Fodero Dining Car Company, the diner is decked out in chrome with black and white accents, making it almost feel like it’s wearing a tuxedo. After closing in the early 1970s, the Empire later found fame as an upscale eatery during the Chelsea renaissance of the 1970s/80s.

The diner was once topped with a stainless steel Empire State Building, sadly now gone (the EAT sign is still there, thankfully):

Picture courtesy Flickr user Joseph A – Click for larger size!

The Empire closed abruptly in 2010, reopened from 2010-2012 as the badly-reviewed Highliner, then closed again.

Luckily, the Empire Diner is back in business under its original name, offering somewhat upscale versions of all the dishes you go to a diner for.

4) Hector’s – 44 Little West 12th Street – Meatpacking District

Hector’s is unique on the list for being the one diner with no choice but to be a one-story establishment – it’s located directly under the Highline!

In business since 1949, Hector’s is as old-school as they come, and despite the trendiness of the Meatpacking District, it still draws an incredibly quirky clientele who seem to have been transported from a bygone New York. The busiest period is often around 4am when the meatpackers begin arriving for work.

Hector’s has been able to survive because the city owns the building, along with the buildings housing the seven other remaining meatpacking businesses in the area. The rent is kept below market, and for that reason, Hector’s will survive for the forseeable future. Check out this great NY Times article for more info.

5) Square Diner – 33 Leonard Street – Tribeca

The Square Diner has the strangest name on this list for one simple reason…

The diner is actually a triangle!

Blue with stainless steel trim and an unusual roof, the Square Diner dates to 1945 and was once known as the Triangle Diner, according to Forgotten-NY.

If you can picture it without the roof, it’s actually as classic a train-car diner as they come:

But the interior is where the Square diner shines: gorgeous wood-paneled walls and ceiling…

…red vinyl booths…

…and of course, that stainless steel finish:

X) The Terminal Diner – RIP

There’s actually one final stand-alone diner left in New York, though it’s long been abandoned – the former Terminal Diner on West Street. Two years ago, I took these pictures for an article on its history:

At that time, it had been out of business for six years and was in horrible shape, but still had a bit of life left.

I swung by last week to take updated pictures for this article, and was relieved to see that the owner’s appeared to finally be making an effort to preserve it with the addition of plywood covering the front.

Then I took a look through the fence. Nope – this one’s a corpse.

Let’s not have any of the other five diners on this list end up like the Terminal. Every once in a while, make it a point to close the Yelp app and put your trust in a classic New York diner. You won’t be disappointed.

-SCOUT

PS – For more information on New York’s diners in all five boroughs, be sure to read Forgotten NY’s fantastic article on the subject.

PPS – If it’s any consolation, several of New York’s diners have been packed up and shipped off to the other destinations, preserving them in the most extreme fashion imaginable.

"Ew, stop it!" [x]

You might've heard about Under Armour's crazy new zipper that only requires one hand to zip. Though the futuristic magnetic clasp jigsaws nicely with the company's high-performance standards, the zipper was originally had more humble origins: helping a sick man lead an easier life.

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