Shared posts

05 Aug 15:43

Blood Donation Clinic Email Subject Line or Orc Battle Cry?

by Jacob Pacey

1. The need for blood is constant

2. A new blood story is written every day

3. Your blood is the currency of life

4. Life begins and ends with blood

5. Help meet our growing need for blood

6. Together we remember

7. Help meet our nation’s growing need for blood

8. The need for blood is rising

9. The need for blood doesn’t stop

- - -

Blood Donation Clinic: 1-9

05 Aug 14:09

I’m Here

by Reza
05 Aug 11:57

Physical distancing, mask-wearing could be in place for 2-3 years even with vaccine, Tam warns

by Ryan Patrick Jones
COVID CDA 20200804

Canadians shouldn't expect a COVID-19 vaccine to be a "silver bullet" that will bring a swift end to the coronavirus pandemic and a return to normal, according to the country's chief public health officer.

05 Aug 11:46

Neil Young sues Donald Trump's campaign for using his songs

The US president has played Rockin' in the Free World at events without the rock star's permission
05 Aug 04:48

Stranded Mariners Rescued From Island In Micronesia, Thanks To 'SOS' Etched In Sand

by Rachel Treisman
In this photo provided by the Australian Defence Force, an Australian Army helicopter lands on Pikelot Island in the Federated States of Micronesia to rescue three stranded mariners who had been missing for nearly three days.

U.S. and Australian responders spotted the three-person skiff crew on tiny Pikelot Island after they had been missing for nearly three days.

(Image credit: HOGP/AP)

05 Aug 02:20

Analysis: Trump whipped out the charts to make his case about coronavirus. They didn't help

Donald Trump and Australian journalist Jonathan Swan both came prepared for their interview about coronavirus, but it was the simplest questions that highlighted the US President's missteps, writes Kathryn Diss.
05 Aug 02:04

The Best Thing in Texas: Curbside Larry Is the Hero We Need in These Times

by Dan Solomon
WHO: Curbside Larry, the instantly iconic pitchman of the Harris County Public Library. WHAT: A parody of a late-night local used car ad that sells you books for the low price of free, free, free. WHY IT’S SO GREAT: Like the rest of us, librarians are anxious, stressed, bored, and trying their very best to do a good job in this uncertain time. They have a little more time on their hands than they used to, and are looking for creative ways to accomplish things that used to be much easier. (In their case, getting books to the people who want to read them.) And the Harris County Public Library figured out one clever way to do that: creating a hero who, in these troubled times, reassures…View Original Post

The post The Best Thing in Texas: Curbside Larry Is the Hero We Need in These Times appeared first on Texas Monthly.

05 Aug 01:57

Chignon

by Cassandra Calin

04 Aug 15:28

Reasons My Baby Will No Longer Be Wearing a Diaper in Public

by Lisa Argyle

I have a duty to protect my family from the heavy hand of government. Diapers limit my baby’s constitutional right to free expression.

Once that excrement leaves his body, he’s not responsible for it anymore, and I shouldn’t have to be either. If you don’t want to touch it, just stay home.

Every time he pees, the diaper gets filled up with disgusting germs, and he just sits in it for hours on end. Research shows that wearing a diaper significantly increases his likelihood of contracting a diaper rash or urinary tract infection. He should not be asked to sacrifice his health and comfort just because you are afraid of a little urine.

He likes a fresh breeze around his newly powdered privates, and diapers make him feel sweaty and restrict his movement.

Sometimes his diaper leaks. Since I can’t rely on it to hold in 100% of the problem, why should I even bother?

Fecal-oral disease transmission is not that likely. And he’s probably not sick anyway. If you are concerned, wash your hands and don’t eat his poop.

We will continue our morning routine of playing at the park. As a public venue, we have just as much right to be there as you do. If you are bothered by the damp swings and a little poop down the slides, just put a diaper on your own baby and pack your gloves and Clorox wipes.

Your health is your responsibility, and my health is mine.

Of course, if you are worried about encountering bodily discharge in public, I won’t stop you from diapering your own baby. That’s your choice. But my freedom to decide what my family will — or won’t — wear shouldn’t be limited by your fears.

Store employees might complain and ask for him to be diapered. The store should be regularly cleaned anyway, so the trail of pee down the aisle should be taken care of soon. Isn’t that what the employees are paid to do?

But just in case there’s a problem, I printed up a card that says my son can’t wear a diaper for medical reasons and the ADA says they have to let us in.

We are not sheeple. We are all adults who can make our own decisions about what we want to be exposed to. So if you want to keep diapering your babies, wearing masks and gloves, and carrying bleach everywhere you go, that’s your choice. I can’t and won’t live like that anymore.

04 Aug 13:41

Sharpies

by Jen Coleman

Alabama

- - -

With national leadership urging schools to reopen this fall despite rising cases of COVID-19, classroom teachers are facing bewildering choices. Already undervalued, teachers are weighing the dangers of in-person instruction against the effectiveness of online learning, with little certainty about either. Students are isolated, parents are exhausted, school districts are scrambling to make responsible decisions, yet teachers themselves are being asked to carry most of this burden, risking their lives and their families’ lives to do their jobs. Even a superhero would be daunted. As we approach the start of the 2020 academic year, we asked U.S. K-12 teachers to tell us how they’re feeling and how they’re planning for the year ahead.

- - -

I keep thinking about Sharpies.

Teachers can pull Sharpies out of pockets the way magicians produce rabbits. I normally have two or three rattling around the bottom of my laptop bag. I was once in line at Starbucks when the Sharpie marker being shared between three baristas ran out of ink. They rummaged under the registers, desperately looking for a replacement before the caffeine-deprived hordes turned on them. I felt like a badass superhero when I stepped to the counter and offered three different colors for them to pick from.

But I’m thinking about one Sharpie pen in particular. It’s black, medium thickness. And it stays in the blue emergency bag that I keep on the filing cabinet closest to my classroom door. Our school’s emergency bags are remarkably sparse. No band-aids, no first aid materials. We have one flashlight, one sign with my name to help my students find our class if they get separated during a mass exodus, one copy of my class rosters, and one Sharpie marker. Why a marker? Someone asked that very question at a staff meeting. The nurse explained, in a completely emotionless tone, that the Sharpie was so we could identify students and write their names on their bodies in the event of an incident.

She was vague, but we all knew exactly what she was saying. You have a marker in case someone armed with a military-style assault rifle strolls onto campus and starts murdering your co-workers and students. When the shooting stops, we need you to walk through the carnage of your classroom, checking for signs of life. And where there is none, take out that marker and write the name of that precious child, that beautiful life snuffed out too early. She didn’t tell us where we were supposed to write the name — on an arm? A leg? But nobody asked any more questions. We shuffled out of the library silently.

That Sharpie tells me everything I need to know about teaching through COVID. We could have poured resources into prevention. We could’ve spent all summer enforcing mask use and social distancing. We could’ve sacrificed small pleasures for the greater good. We could’ve kept this from happening. But instead, we’re blindly barreling toward reopening even though we know teachers and students will die. We’re going to treat COVID the same way we treat school shootings. An unfortunate but unavoidable cost to doing business. There will be some new morbid addition to the emergency bag. Some simple tool made macabre by the expectation for its use. And like we always do, we will ask our teachers to stand in the doorways and use our bodies as human shields. And if we make it out alive, we’ll be the ones tasked with walking through the wreckage and counting the bodies.

- - -

Jen Coleman is a high school English teacher and mother to two monsters masquerading as toddlers. She has an MFA in creative writing from American University and lives in Alabama.

- - -

Read more essays by teachers returning to school this fall.

04 Aug 12:25

Comic for 2020.08.04

New Cyanide and Happiness Comic
04 Aug 02:30

Scientist Tech Help

I vaguely and irrationally resent how useful WebPlotDigitizer is.
03 Aug 21:21

Missing sailors found on tiny Pacific Island after writing SOS in the sand

Australian and US military forces have come to the rescue of three missing sailors on a tiny Pacific island after they wrote a large SOS in the sand.
03 Aug 20:01

The Elflord and the Mayfly

"The sun rose, and the mayfly emerged from the watery depths of the lake,  and became conscious of the world. "

"It fluttered around, in amazement in the beauty of the earth, trying to see everything it could in a flurry."

"Anxiety gripped it. What should it do? What should it see? It knew it only had a small time in the air before it was gone forever."

"It then saw a mighty elflord, sitting silently, staring at the sky."

Elflord: "And why is that, my little friend?"
Mayfly: "Noble elf, how i wish i could be of your kind, and not cursed to this short life!"

Mayfly: "To live eternally, beneath the sun! I am but a mayfly, and my time ends almost as quickly as it begins. With eternity i could see all the wonders of the world. "
Elflord: "That is more true than you realize."


Elflord: "Eternity, my friend, is very long. By the time you have traveled the earth and seen all it has to offer - you will still have an eternity to go. "
Elflord: "And what, then, will you do?"

Mayfly: "I could create wonders of my own. With all of time to perfect my craft, i could make such beautiful art!"

Elflord: "What reason have i to create wonders? So i can grow bored with them as time stretches out? So i can watch them fade away to dust?"

Elflord: "What you call perfecting your craft, i call exhausting the limits of my creativity, leaving me again with nothing left to do for all time. One cannot make progress on eternity."

Mayfly: "How can you say that? With all that time i could discover new passions which i will never know!"
Elflord: "And after you are done, you will still have an eternity left again."

Elflord: "We labored mightily to create great works, buildings of splendor, sculptures and paintings of great beauty."

Elflord: "When the elves first awoke, and the world was new, we thought as you do now."


Elflord: "But as time passed, our creations began to fade away. The rain and wind ate away at our work. At first, with great energy, we took to repairing and replacing what was damaged. "

Elflord: "But time still stretched on, and soon we grew suspiscious of our labor. For what purpose do we repair them? For whom? Should we seek to keep these things pristine for all of time?"

Elflord: "Why did we even make them to begin with?"

Elflord: "No matter what we did, they would only exist for a fraction of our lives...a fraction so small next to eternity that it was nothing. They might as well have not existed at all."

Elflord: "It was then that we gave up on art, and now spend our time in only contemplation. But many fear the time for that will be over soon as well, when all that we can think is discovered."

Elflord: "It is for this reason, my friend, that you should not envy me, for you have a gift that i will never have - the gift of death."


Mayfly: "It doesn't seem like much of a gift. "

Elflord: "I'm sure it doesn't, no creature wishes to die."

Elflord: "But in exchange what you do with your time can mean so much more to you. You can feel what i will never feel."

"The elflord's words still didn't seem right to the mayfly. but the sun was setting, and his body was growing weary."

Mayfly: "My time is coming to an end, and although there is much i wish i could have done, i want to thank you for the conversation."

Elflord: "Thank you, my friend. You too made my time worth living. Although your life was brief, your passion for life will not be forgotten."

"And so the sun set, and the Elflord was alone with his thoughts once again."

"He got up, and started off towards the old workshops, to begin work on a new project."
03 Aug 19:54

Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Conation

by tech@thehiveworks.com


Click here to go see the bonus panel!

Hovertext:
I'm just here to convince people to use 'conate' in casual conversation.


Today's News:
03 Aug 19:52

Sent and seen

by Cassandra Calin

Unsent but always seen beforehand.

03 Aug 19:51

Bill English: Computer mouse co-creator dies at 91

Bill English was the first person to use a computer mouse, building the first prototype in 1963.
03 Aug 15:14

The Store Safety Policies of Small Business Owners From Romantic Comedies

by Landy Erlick

Toula Portokalos
Aunt Voula’s Travel Agency
(My Big Fat Greek Wedding)

Toula is exclusively offering “virtual” trips, where she will describe to you in great detail what it feels like to walk around Greece. She has cut all ties with United Airlines.

Jake Perry
Deep South Glass
(Sweet Home Alabama)

Jake is shipping nationwide, but please expect delays. He is trying his best not to breathe a lot when he does the glassblowing.

Kathleen Kelly
The Shop Around the Corner
(You’ve Got Mail)

Along with your mask, Kathleen asks that you also bring an aversion to Amazon. She will spray you with disinfectant and vintage perfume upon entry. All children must be accompanied by Tom Hanks.

Elizabeth James
Elizabeth James Designs
(The Parent Trap)

All customers must stand six feet apart, unless you are twins. Twins may stand next to each other. There is a limit of one, music-accompanied “wedding dress and accessories try-on” montage per person. The butler will sanitize dresses between each fitting.

Nick Parker
Parker Knoll Vineyard
(The Parent Trap)

Nick has temporarily canceled all wine tastings. He is saving the wine for himself. Sometimes, he drinks so much he sees double.

Mary Fiore
Wedding Planner
(The Wedding Planner)

Mary is working round-the-clock on Zoom to help you cut your guest list down to two people. She suggests that it be you and your fiancé.

William Thacker
The Travel Book Company
(Notting Hill)

William is just a man who sells travel books, standing in front of a customer who wants to buy a travel book, asking them to wear a mask. However, out of an abundance of caution, Americans are not allowed in the store — with the exception of female movie stars.

Jane Adler
The Bakery
(It’s Complicated)

The Bakery is temporarily closed, but Jane is hoping to start Instagram live baking classes once she figures out what Instagram is.

Vivian Ward
Escort (Pretty Woman)

Vivian will gladly walk you through a step-by-step diagram of what she would do to you, if you didn’t have to stay six feet apart.

Matt Flamhaff
Freelance Photographer
(13 Going on 30)

In lieu of a photoshoot, Matt will take a screenshot of you over FaceTime. With the basic package, he will text it to you. With the premium package, he will email it.

Donna Sheridan
Hotel Villa Donna
(Mamma Mia!)

Upon arrival, all guests must take both a coronavirus and a paternity test.

03 Aug 13:27

You Might

by Reza
03 Aug 12:13

Comic for 2020.08.03

New Cyanide and Happiness Comic
03 Aug 12:10

Computer mouse co-inventor William English dies at 91

by Jon Fingas

One of the pioneers of the modern computer interface has passed away: the New York Times reports that William “Bill” English died on July 26th from respiratory failure at the age of 91. Alongside Douglas Englebart at the Stanford Research Institute, English helped develop the first computer mouse and put together a 1968 “Mother of All Demos” that outlined many concepts that would come to PCs over the decades, such as graphical user interfaces, online text editing, video calls and hypertext links.

While Englebart was considered the visionary, English was one of the only people who truly grasped the ideas and had the talent to bring them to fruition. He built the mouse after Englebart drew a sketch of it, for example. While Englebart was demonstrating the concepts at that 1968 event, English was orchestrating things behind the scenes.

It’s not hard to see English’s legacy. While touchscreens are increasingly common, many of the other features he and Englebart foresaw would be refined at places like Xerox PARC and find their way into the mainstream, where they still dominate today. In that sense, English could make his presence felt for decades to come.

03 Aug 11:39

Awkward Zombie - Short-Changed

by tech@thehiveworks.com

New comic!

Today's News:

My Pokemon keep evolving into tall men? Help??

03 Aug 11:37

You may already be a goth. I'm so sorry.

this is a diesel sweeties comic strip

Unfortunately, we’re all too nihilistic to find a cure for Goth.

03 Aug 00:56

A&W Root Beer – Austin

by atomiclauren
8929 N. Lamar Blvd., Austin TX (built 1972)
02 Aug 23:23

Austin protesters clash with police in the wake of Garrett Foster's death

by Jordan Vonderhaar
Armed protesters guard the memorial of Garrett Foster, who was shot and killed during a protest against police brutality in Austin on July 25, 2020.
Armed protesters guard the memorial of Garrett Foster, who was shot and killed during a protest against police brutality in Austin on July 25, 2020. Jordan Vonderhaar for the Texas Tribune

Sign up for The Brief, our daily newsletter that keeps readers up to speed on the most essential Texas news.

Throughout the summer, cities in Texas and around the country have seen protests and demonstrations against police brutality. On Saturday, protesters and law enforcement clashed in Austin, a week after protester Garrett Foster, who was openly carrying an AK-47 rifle — which is legal in Texas — was shot and killed by Daniel Perry, a U.S. Army sergeant, when he approached his car. Perry drove away, then called the police. Perry was released without being charged. Since then, questions have been raised about who was the aggressor.

Foster’s death fueled tensions Saturday night in the downtown streets of the state capital as demonstrators again gathered and local and state police turned out in massive force. Tribune photographer Jordan Vonderhaar was there to document the protest. Here’s what he saw.

State police in riot gear form a line along Congress Avenue and advance toward protesters to remove them from the street.
State police in riot gear form a line along Congress Avenue and advance toward protesters to remove them from the street. Jordan Vonderhaar
Armed protest sympathizers ride in the back of a pickup truck from a rally on the University of Texas campus to a memorial for Garrett Foster in downtown Austin, minutes after hearing of clashes between protesters and police.
Armed protest sympathizers ride in the back of a pickup truck from a rally on the University of Texas campus to a memorial for Garrett Foster in downtown Austin, minutes after hearing of clashes between protesters and police. Jordan Vonderhaar for the Texas Tribune
A man with a sniper rifle slung over his shoulder stands among protesters who have gathered at the Garrett Foster memorial in downtown Austin on Aug. 1, 2020.
A man with a sniper rifle slung over his shoulder stands among protesters who have gathered at the Garrett Foster memorial in downtown Austin on Aug. 1, 2020. Jordan Vonderhaar for the Texas Tribune

First: Armed protesters ride in the back of a pickup truck from a rally at the University of Texas to a memorial for Garrett Foster in downtown Austin, minutes after hearing of clashes between other protesters and police. Last: A man with a sniper rifle slung over his shoulder stands among protesters who have gathered at the Garrett Foster memorial in downtown Austin. Jordan Vonderhaar for The Texas Tribune

A protester confronts police in riot gear.
A protester confronts police in riot gear. Jordan Vonderhaar for the Texas Tribune
Mounted officers from the Austin Police Department clash with protesters on the corner of Fourth St. and Congress Ave. in downtown Austin on Aug. 1, 2020.
Mounted officers from the Austin Police Department clash with protesters on the corner of Fourth St. and Congress Ave. in downtown Austin on Aug. 1, 2020. Jordan Vonderhaar
Mounted officers from APD ride towards protesters on the corner of Fourth St. and S. Congress Ave in downtown Austin on Aug. 1, 2020.
Mounted officers from APD ride towards protesters on the corner of Fourth St. and S. Congress Ave in downtown Austin on Aug. 1, 2020. Jordan Vonderhaar

First: Mounted officers from the Austin Police Department clash with protesters on the corner of Fourth Street and Congress Avenue in downtown Austin. Last: Police officers on horses and bicycles advance toward protesters. Jordan Vonderhaar for The Texas Tribune

Heavily armed state police in downtown Austin on Aug. 1, 2020.
Heavily armed state police in downtown Austin on Aug. 1, 2020. Jordan Vonderhaar for the Texas Tribune
State police in riot gear block protesters from gathering in the street in downtown Austin on Aug. 1, 2020.
State police in riot gear block protesters from gathering in the street in downtown Austin on Aug. 1, 2020. Jordan Vonderhaar for the Texas Tribune

State police were present large numbers. Jordan Vonderhaar for the Texas Tribune

A protester armed with a baseball bat kneels in the street with fist upraised as protesters clashed with police in downtown Austin on Aug. 1, 2020.
A protester armed with a baseball bat kneels in the street with fist upraised as protesters clashed with police in downtown Austin on Aug. 1, 2020. Jordan Vonderhaar for the Texas Tribune
Members of the far-right Proud Boys militia stand on Congress Avenue across from the Garrett Foster memorial in downtown Austin.
Members of the far-right Proud Boys militia stand on Congress Avenue across from the Garrett Foster memorial in downtown Austin. Jordan Vonderhaar for the Texas Tribune
A woman in zip-tie handcuffs waits to be loaded onto a bus after being arrested during protests against police brutality in downtown Austin on Aug. 1, 2020.
A woman in zip-tie handcuffs waits to be loaded onto a bus after being arrested during protests against police brutality in downtown Austin on Aug. 1, 2020. Jordan Vonderhaar for the Texas Tribune
Police load arrested protesters into a Travis County Sheriff’s Department bus. Several protestors were arrested after clashes with police in riot gear in downtown Austin on August 1, 2020.
Police load arrested protesters into a Travis County Sheriff’s Department bus. Several protestors were arrested after clashes with police in riot gear in downtown Austin on August 1, 2020. Jordan Vonderhaar for the Texas Tribune

First: A woman with her hands zip-tied waits to be loaded onto a bus after being arrested during protests against police brutality in downtown Austin. Last: Police load arrested protesters into a Travis County Sheriff Department bus. Jordan Vonderhaar for the Texas Tribune

A police officer sprays a protester with pepper spray as demonstrators clash with police in downtown Austin
A police officer sprays a protester with pepper spray as demonstrators clash with police in downtown Austin Jordan Vonderhaar for the Texas Tribune
A heavy police presence marked Saturday's protest in downtown Austin.
A heavy police presence marked Saturday's protest in downtown Austin. Jordan Vonderhaar for the Texas Tribune
02 Aug 18:58

Tropical Storm Isaias Closes In On Florida

by Huo Jingnan
Palm Beach County Fire Rescue check out the ocean as waves crash ashore from Tropical Storm Isaias as it passes through the area on August 2, 2020 in Juno Beach, Fla.

While the storm has weakened from hurricane status, it had sustained winds on Sunday of 65 mph and is expected to inundate much of the East Coast this week with heavy rains and strong winds.

(Image credit: Joe Raedle/Getty Images)

02 Aug 16:15

Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Prediction

by tech@thehiveworks.com


Click here to go see the bonus panel!

Hovertext:
This is the lone context in which sports fans appear incredibly rational.


Today's News:
02 Aug 15:40

Americans, Go Home: Canadians Track U.S. Boaters Sneaking Across The Border

by Martha Ann Overland
View of the waterfront from Vancouver Island, British Columbia, Canada on January 20, 2020. The number of American pleasure craft arriving from Washington state has alarmed Canadians living just across the border.

U.S. pleasure boats have been sneaking into Canada despite a border shutdown. A group of Canadian retirees is on the lookout for violators from the "petri dish" that is America.

(Image credit: Mark Goodnow/AFP via Getty Images)

01 Aug 20:33

Arizona Congressman Raúl Grijalva Tests Positive For COVID-19

by Christianna Silva
U.S. House Natural Resources Committee Chairman Raul Grijalva of Arizona presides over a hearing examining Park Police response to Lafayette Square protests on June 29 in Washington, D.C. Grijalva tested positive for COVID-19 on Friday.

It's unclear how the Democrat, who says he is asymptomatic, contracted the virus, but earlier this week, he presided over a hearing that included another member who has since tested positive.

(Image credit: Bonnie Cash/Pool/Getty Images)

01 Aug 20:31

Meme

by Sarah Andersen