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10 Dec 03:31

punxsutawneyphyllis:rosslynpaladin: specialsituationsgroup:datsderbunnyblog:Alright. Let’s suppose...


"He uses a cane because he needs it and it improves his life.

That doesn’t mean he cannot make you regret your life choices- all of them. These two things are not related."





Alright. Let’s suppose for a moment that Vetinari is faking/exaggerating his disability and doesn’t really need a cane at all. I know, I know, hear me out here.

Why might he do this? Well, ultimately in this case he would presumably like people to underestimate his ability in combat due to their perception of his disability. Because obviously anyone who needs to use a mobility aid is automatically incapable of defending themselves, surely?

Ok. Now, let’s assume instead that he really does need his cane. In that case, I assume people must be attacking him every five minutes, and he’s as good as dead, no?

No. Because there are soon rumours that he doesn’t actually need a cane, he’s been faking it all along; and in fact it’s not a cane at all, it’s a hidden sword forged from the iron of the blood of his enemies.

In both cases, Vetinari is exploiting ableist assumptions. Isn’t that just a thing of beauty?

The safest way to interpret this, therefore, is to assume that Vetinari really is disabled, but that this has absolutely nothing to do with whether or not he’s capable of kicking your arse before you can say “scorpion pit”. And you’d better believe that he is.

Of course, coincidentally, there’s the added bonus this interpretation also just happens to be the one that isn’t inherently ableist and dismissive of the entire disabled community. There are plenty of people who legitimately need to use a cane day-to-day, who are also perfectly capable of running, fighting, getting donkeys down from minarets, stealing magic carpets, juggling melons and knives, shovelling coal like a boss… Wait, what was I saying? Oh yeah. Stop being ableist. That was it. Yeah.

“Any concealed weapons?”, Vimes asked. “Concealed no.” Vetinari was so bland it was pointed. He very pointedly did not glance anywhere, nor move in the slightest. And the only thing he had with him was the cane. Vimes heard the rumor of course, it was as inescapable as the stench wafting of the Ankh. But Vetinari would not lie to him. Not here. Not today. He eyed the cane. Vetinari did not follow his gaze, watching him instead, waiting for the moment of understanding. The Patrician was an assassin, in all likelihood he didn’t need weapons. But the implication was obvious, and there was only the cane. Vimes watched the aid like he once watched a dungeon door. He smirked. Of course. Everyone heard the rumor. Vimes would bet an eye that Vetinari made sure of it. Everyone knew he had a sword in that cane. Any attacker would be expecting a sword. They would count on that second of unsheathing. But there would be no warning. Only a steel ball on a length of solid wood. Vimes smirked. “Nice club.” Vetinari smiled.

He uses a cane because he needs it and it improves his life.

That doesn’t mean he cannot make you regret your life choices- all of them. These two things are not related.

Vetinari is disabled. In “The Truth”, Vimes says that he has a game leg. However, in the same book, he also proves himself capable of defending himself. I quote:

“Mr. Slant had failed to tell the New Firm quite a lot of things, and one of them was that Vetinari moved like a snake. This was going to cost the lawyer a lot of money. Mr. Pin had nearly got cut.”

People may point out that Vetinari got knocked out during that incident, but to be fair, he had just been confronted by his doppelganger. That’s enough to put anyone off their game.

In conclusion, Pterry explicitly wrote a disabled character who is capable of defending himself, and people with ableist headcanons can stuff it.

10 Dec 03:23

znicehonix:tentacle-dick: ghostspies: leona-florianova: znicehonix: leona-florianova: Instead...







Instead of Santa..Gifts here are brought by infant Jesus. Love all the theories we made when we were children on how the hell does he get inside and how does he bring the gifts. Some of my favorites are:

Just creepily levitating baby..conjuring gifts from nothingness.

Just normal baby climbing in the house via window.. somehow dragging huge bag.

Already grown up Jesus.. using the same window method as his infant self.

Jesus on the cross somehow levitating or teleporting into the house…trying not to break anything.

Jesus on a cross which actually somehow works as a pogo stick. 

Fun fact, baby Jesus (Ježíšek) sounded like hedgehog (ježek) to my little not religious self. So I imagined my presents were brought by a giant hedgehog with the presents on its pricks

that actually sounds like way better and advanced version

ježek !!!! aaa same !!!! i always imagined a hedgehog in yellow pyjamas

this year the slovak post office sent christmas letters from baby jesus except they made a typo

so instead of ježiško (baby jesus) being signed at the bottom it said ježisko (a giant hedgehog)

obviously memes happened


10 Dec 03:14


10 Dec 03:00

syn0vial:boba fett kicking ass in “the tragedy” to “mama said...


boba fett kicking ass in “the tragedy” to “mama said knock you out” by LL cool J, no i do not have any regrets


10 Dec 02:57

mirage358:kyraneko:kyraneko: biggest-gaudiest-patronuses: tell me something nice if you grow...


Mushrooms are wild.





tell me something nice

if you grow mushrooms over a toxic waste site, chemical spill, or other polluted growing medium, they will suck up the toxins into their fruiting bodies with such effectiveness that they are being studied for their ability to clean up tainted industrial sites. it’s called mycoremediation.

if you do this with edible mushrooms, they are no longer technically edible, but on the other hand they make a great way to poison your enemies. this is called murder and it’s usually frowned upon, but they won’t see it coming and you get bragging rights afterwards about your ability to kill people with a pizza topping.

Sorry this was not precisely most people’s idea of “nice.” Let me add that you are a glow of comforting absurdity in an ever-more-fucked-up world.

I love everything about mycoremediation, but also

10 Dec 02:55

ivytea:fossil record patisserie


fossil record patisserie

10 Dec 02:54

cute-n-lazy-femme: shennanigoats: sunspotpony: ranma-official: omgweatherunderground: steelplat...








good idea: marry a blacksmith so you can get free swords whenever 

Better idea; become a miner and then marry a blacksmith so he can have the required materials for you to get free swords whenever. 

Make a harem and marry a full production chain


I mean, if your harem is full of blacksmiths would that make it a polyhammerous relationship?

You could make a whole polyarmory

01 Dec 02:48

elodieunderglass: figdays: Toadstools Art Print...



Toadstools Art Print // BeatrixCromwell


01 Dec 01:55

derinthescarletpescatarian:thevastnessof:conchobarbarian:I did more knitting for this pie crust than...




I did more knitting for this pie crust than I have on my actual knitting WIP in the last week


01 Dec 01:46

c2ndy2c1d:Be careful who you call ugly in middle school Based...


Be careful who you call ugly in middle school

Based off my Camp Counselor Jason!AU


01 Dec 01:42

owengrose:amuseoffyre:asundergrowth:qsy-complains-a-lot: asundergrowth:qsy-draws-a-lot: asundergrow...









Gotta love how the mass media version of being progressive is to make yet another series about Tudor-era English royalty but casting black people in it. Why the fuck aren’t we simply getting stories from early modern Africa ? Who even gives a shit about Ann Boleyn at this point ?

Netflix studios will dig into historical documents to find some random knights aide from 1071 to made a serial about while the empire of Mali is right there complete with an evil sorcerer king with sandals made of human skin like the shit might as well write itself.

SEE ??! I want to learn about a guy fighting a wizard with necronomishoes !

Broke: “this english king is sad sometimes”

Woke: Shaka Zulu defeating an entire modern dutch colonial army with nothing but spearmen and superior tactics

Bespoke: Queen Nzinga of Ndongo and Matamba ending portuguese colonial rule using nothing but wits and diplomacy.

I want a series about the lead up and battle of Alcacer Quibir from the Moroccan point of view.

Period drama about being a struggling textile merchant in Cairo when Mansa Musa rolls in on the haj

Ibn Battuta’s road trip, only filmed from the POV of his eye-rolling travel companions, because wow he was a bit of a condescending twit and always telling the foreigners how they were Doing Things Wrong (to the point of being kicked off one of the islands where he was somehow set up with everything he needed and annoyed everyone into driving him away)

Queen Amanirenas was a buff, one-eyed queen of Kush who captured Roman forts in Egypt, and returned with a severed bust of Cesar Augustus’s head and buried it beneath the steps of a temple in Kush so everyone would walk on him. 

01 Dec 01:38

thestuffedalligator: In the spirit of the season, I insist you...


In the spirit of the season, I insist you watch this.

25 Nov 04:59

oak-png:canadianinja:My dad kept having trouble with my pronouns (they/them) so I told him to...



My dad kept having trouble with my pronouns (they/them) so I told him to pretend I was a swarm of bees and it somehow helped

the NB in Non Binary actually stands for Numerous Bees

25 Nov 04:59

snazzystarlight:mockwa:Beethoven — Fur Chiken This is what I’ve...



Beethoven — Fur Chiken

This is what I’ve chosen to use my synesthesia for, apparently.

03 Oct 17:46

COVID Risk Comfort Zone

I'm like a vampire, except I'm not crossing that threshold even if you invite me.
03 Oct 17:24


by Reza
03 Oct 16:56

Magic Ring Friends

by KatSwenski

CW: sneks

The power of "heart"? Nah, man, snakes is where it's at. 

01 Aug 11:12

The Future Predicted

by Randal Milholland

Comic for 7-30-2020

The post The Future Predicted appeared first on Something Positive.

26 May 01:10

"All is Well!" (1970)

by Scarfolk Council
26 May 00:55

A trick of the light.

by Jessica Hagy

The post A trick of the light. appeared first on Indexed.

26 May 00:52

The opposite of trolling.

by Jessica Hagy

The post The opposite of trolling. appeared first on Indexed.

20 Apr 04:03

This is the plan, people:

by Jessica Hagy

The post This is the plan, people: appeared first on Indexed.

20 Apr 04:02

More bubble less trouble.

by Jessica Hagy

The post More bubble less trouble. appeared first on Indexed.

20 Apr 04:02


by Jessica Hagy

The post Serfing. appeared first on Indexed.

30 Mar 02:54


This medicine says it may cause lightheadedness, dry mouth, and blurred vision, but my head feels incredibly heavy, water is pouring from my mouth, and I can see individual hummingbird wingbeats, so I think I'm fine.
08 Mar 22:56

1194: Spiritual Counseling


"Did I listen to them? No! I mean, I listened, or else I wouldn't have know they said it. But it didn't stop me!"
08 Mar 22:40

Comic for 2020.03.06

New Cyanide and Happiness Comic
28 Jan 16:06

Reaction Maps


I'm sorry, but both the pun and the word play in the driving directions make me happy.

If Google Maps stops letting you navigate to (Clay County District) A in West Virginia, you can try Jump, OH -> Ina, IL -> Big Hole, TX.