I recently designed a basic website for a client. I did it for free as a favour, trusting that he would not be too choosy. Today I received some revisions from said customer that came in the form of: handwritten notes in an image file on a scanned photocopy of a photo of the website on his monitor.
Me: We need to go deeper.
Client: What?
Me: Never mind.
Sorry everyone. Due to technical difficulties, the Big Announcement won't be until Tuesday or Wednesday. More info soon. MEANTIME, there's a new BAHFest Video!
HOLLY CoW #drunkjcrew #oscars #moonlight @drunkjcrewuguys
Big announcement Monday! Stay tuned...
Big announcement Monday. Maybe the biggest of my life. Hope you geeks like it!
Tomorrow morning, big news, and bonus updates!
Also tragic. #truesuffering
Just in case you forgot, this is as bad as racism gets for white people. #sarah
Here’s a handy guide to racist thought: When something bad happened, white people are always victims of circumstance, people of color are always responsible for their shortcomings.
When something good happens, whoops, the converse.
Racists always act like they can make their VERY STUPID and VERY OBVIOUS insinuations and then act all shocked and surprised when you call them out on obvious shit. Listen, if someone is culturally aware enough to think that fried chicken is associated with “the south” they’re also culturally aware enough to know that fried chicken is even more associated with black folks, in a racist way. And if, for some reason they aren’t (they actually are), the fact that they get all defensive when you tell them this fact means they’re racists and bad people. Don’t let them gaslight you into thinking you’re the racist for pointing out racist shit. Please.
“move a couple of those leggies outta your eyeline and you’re good to go. hell, it’s breathin for ya, i wish i had one of them. i get winded taking the stairs”
In a lot of ways, every day can be Fuck The President (He’s Racist) Day.
Little secret: people like you are the actual main reason I do this webpage.
Some fresh and tasty book reviews have been posted at The Weinerworks.
British Columbia woodsman Francis Wharton shot a deer in the late 1960s but had no serviceable teeth with which to eat it.
With venison steak hanging in the balance, Wharton extracted the teeth from his deer, filed and ground them to what appeared a handy size. He then chewed up a wad of Plastic Wood, molding it to the shape of his gums, and thereto affixed the teeth, using household cement for binder. Francis then sat down to a hearty meal of venison and ate it with the deer’s own teeth.
That’s from dental researcher Gardner P.H. Foley’s 1972 Treasury of Dentistry. The teeth, described as “loose,” “dark and dirty,” are on display at the Museum of Health Care in Kingston. Reportedly Wharton used them for three years; collections manager Kathy Karkut says, “He must have used a lot of Polident.”
Client: I put these documents in the fax machine, but they didn’t come back out.
Me: That’s the paper shredder.
Client: Oh! Can you set it to reverse? Those papers are very important.
Client: We want to thoroughly document these processes so everyone can understand how to use the new online systems.
Me: That makes a lot of sense. I’ll send you an MS Word template so your team can work on the supplying content more quickly.
Client: We were thinking it would make more sense to use Adobe Captivate. It’s a really cool program and it’s got a lot of features we could use for our material.
Me: I use Captivate quite frequently, and yes, it’s a great tool. However, we’ve established that we’re documenting basic processes, correct?
Client: Yes, but Word doesn’t provide the functionality we need. We want to put PDFs of this up on our internal website.
Me: Just so I understand what you’re requesting, let me repeat all of this back to you. Your team would like to create non-interactive, text-based lists in Captivate, publish the end result as a PDF, then upload those PDFs to a website. Is that correct?
Client: (Losing confidence in the plan) Yes…do you pay for Captivate licenses that we can use?
Me: Unfortunately not, that will have to be something your company will need to handle. If you’d like, I can show you how much they cost, and give you an estimate for the amount of people on your team who will need access.
Client: Well, why don’t we just use Word?
Me: That seems to be the most economical option. When do you want them?
Hey! Geeks of London! Come see me, March 25th, at Imperial.
In 1857, Édouard-Léon Scott de Martinville patented a device for recording sound: A person spoke or sang into a barrel, causing a membrane of parchment to vibrate and a pig bristle to record a mark on a moving surface of glass or paper.
This was useful in studying the characteristics of sound, but a century and a half would pass before we had the technology to play back the recordings. In 2008, audio historians recovered Scott’s “phonautograms” from the French patent office and converted his waveforms into digital audio files.
The recording below was made on April 9, 1860. It’s the French folk song “Au clair de la lune,” recorded 28 years before Edison’s first wax cylinder.
how the fuck you think the rest of us feel???
![[*disables social networking accounts*] [*social isolation increases*] Wait, why does this ALSO feel bad?](https://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/phone.png "[*disables social networking accounts*] [*social isolation increases*] Wait, why does this ALSO feel bad?")
