Cowboy Who?

Not everybody's worth trying to identify with.

You're probably not going to see a Portal 3 in the near future (Valve seems to have an aversion to third installments), but you're about to get the next best thing: a look at the prequel that never shipped. LunchHouse Software has received permission to produce a documentary series that reveals F-Stop (aka Aperture Camera), a prequel to the Portal series that was cancelled in mid-development. The initial video only shows basic game mechanics, but those already speak volumes.

The game revolved around a logic-breaking camera that could reproduce and modify any object you can capture in a photo. You could snap photos of boxes and resize them to climb to hard-to-reach areas, or photograph a ceiling fan to turn it into a jump pad. The goal, though, would remain familiar -- you'd have to escape test rooms through any means at your disposal.

LunchHouse has promised more videos as part of the series. However, there don't appear to be any intentions to release a public version of F-Stop despite access to the incomplete source code. This is a controlled look at what might have been, not a teaser for a playable copy.

Via: Polygon

Source: Boxandrocks (YouTube)

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I need to do a book of just comics that end with God laughing.

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This is chapter 1 of my first romance novel.

Tons to talk about this week, Zone Oners! Kicking it off:

Buzzy in Cabin John Woods is in open talks with Leonard in Gainsborough Gulley over a new deal that would see the former cardiothoracic surgeon become the area’s largest possessor of canned tuna. How about sharing some of that there oily fishy, doc?!

Still no word on my ex, Rachel. But feelers are out!

Betty in Potomac is inconsolable after sleeping with “a roving band of cannibals” so shortly after dear hubby was consumed by a (different!) swarm of insatiable flesh eaters. We’ve all been there, Betty!

Could it be true that the Hells Bells Militia is set on the elimination of any hated intellectuals who wear glasses? Sounds a bit… short-sighted! Don’t look at me! I wear contacts!!

Blind gossip! Which former one-armed Commandant of Zone 4 is rumored to have run off with a certain “Rachel” but is not always “up” to meeting her special “needs.” You heard it here first, folks!

According to Mountain Annie at Zone 3… the Hottest Wampum Currency this winter will be… untainted tablets of Zithromax! Get searchin’, readers!

Bang Bang Billy is back and recuperating comfortably in his very own dirt trench after a close call with a tribe of feral bikers on motorbikes! His plan now? “Just relax and scrounge up enough wood to build that goddamn catapult I’ve wanted forever!!” Go get ’em, Bang Bang!

Still no word on when your humble gossip columnist can move back into his former colonial on Tuckerman Lane commandeered by a secret government agency that may (or may not?) be the source of our current “predicament”! Word is still out! As am I! C-c-c-c-c-c-c-cold in this here storage locker! Fingers crossed!

If mine ears doth not deceive—and exactly when have they ever? — Pumping Station 23 will be running again in no time! I look forward to all of us wetting our whistles for up to five minutes a day on that most isotope-free agua this side of the Southern Free-Lands! So, come on, Rach, how about a teeny-tiny toast with your former fella?!

Spotted weaving down Democracy Road… yet another Non-Townie with a debilitating case of Captain Wobbles! Sad to see the World Killing Virus still so hard at work! Wish I could be this industrious! If a Rickety Ricky or a Shaky Sam comes in for a kiss or “love” bite, run for them thar hills!!!

Banner day for bookworms!! If you thought the Lost Libraries had been burned to the ground with staff still inside during Summer Purifications… there’s some news to “check out.” (No card required!!) A certain proprietor who shall remain nameless due to valid fears of being quartered by four trucks has painstakingly reassembled up to three-dozen paperback novels and will allow them to be read on premises at the cost of one sorely needed pint of A-negative blood — truly an oasis for the intellect that Rachel would have adored had men with wolves on chains not come calling at my home at her request!!

Rachel, please.

If you’re a fan of brightly colored seashells like I, Bongo Billy (Bang Bang’s younger bro) is definitely your man! Gap between the Two Giant Holes In Which Orphan Children Live on Seven Locks next to Salt Tablet Dispensary! And this HAS NOT BEEN A PAID-IN-SEA-SHELL ADVERTISEMENT! Ahem. Winkers!…

I’m still reeling over twenty-five sacrificed men, women, and children at the hands of the Wood Creatures and their much fêted Penumbral Lunar Eclipse last night! Word has it that the celebration was dazzling and touching, even better than last year’s Death Soiree… Hey guys: what does a Gossip Columnist have to do exactly to get an INVITE?!!!

Breaking! If you’re reading this parchment paper tacked to the light pole just outside the Red Sector A entrance, please say hi to my “main man” Duke the Juke, serving up the best fire-roasted squirrel-on-a-wire-hanger in the Unrestricted District Territory! (8 – 3 PM, but earlier if Tameless Men With Chainsaws happen to surprise!)

Meat You There?! I spy with my one working eye a mostly intact cow carcass merely half a kilometer deep into The Exclusion Zone. Even after The Reavers claim their fill, there should be more than enough Bessie on the bones for us B-List scavengers!

And if you see Rachel there, tell her to come home. Let her know I love her, and I’ll never again barter her for a mallet and a pouch of salt…

That’s it for this week! I’m a gossip man, no time to talk! Keep them Gossip yummy tidbits a-comin’, Zone Oners! And oh yeah: keep Stayin’ Alive!…

Through the art of camouflage.

2019 is dead and buried. It’s time to return to work. Both Holly and I return to work tomorrow ready to help patrons cope with our new year. Before the week is out, at least 10 people will comment that they are still using 2019. I will be wondering what day it is probably for at least a week due to crazy schedules and holidays.

For those of us in public libraries, summer reading will start kicking into high gear and many of us will be writing annual reports for the library. It really is the most wonderful time of the year.

Here are some typical reference desk scenarios you can expect on your return to work.

• Weather themed questions including snowfall, accuracy of weather reports. Generally, this involves a discussion about how the weatherman “lied” when he said we would only get 3 inches of snow, and it ended up being 6 inches.
• When are the tax forms coming? Bonus points for complaints about the changes in the forms. More bonus points if patron talks about conspiracies and invokes a constitutional amendment.
• My kids gave me a ________ . (e-reader, tablet, i-phone, etc) Can you show me how to use it? Bonus points if there is a family drama story associated with this gift.
• My teenager needs to have 100 hours of volunteer time before the end of January. Can he start tomorrow? Bonus points if parents insist s/he be given “interesting” duties since s/he is gifted. Also points if the parent wants to volunteer with the teen.

So to all our friends out there in library land, good luck out there. If weeding is one of your resolutions for 2020, be sure to send us the ugly, scary, funny, and outdated of your finds.

Yours in library service,

Mary and Holly

The post Post Holiday Reference appeared first on Awful Library Books.

Celebrating the last day of 2019 in my pyjamas, binge-watching the classic Mr. Bean episodes. What are your plans? Wishing you all a Happy New Year!

It's not the holidays that kill you, so much as the sudden stop at the end.

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Actually, whenever Arthur takes the train, his horse always gets to the next station before him, presumably implying a special ultra-first-class car for horses.

My least favorite thing about this time of year is not knowing what day of the week it is.

As News Editor, I’ve inherited Glasstire’s New Year’s Eve tradition of encouraging our readers to revisit Ken Friedman’s performance score In One Year and Out the Other. The work, first performed by Friedman in 1975, goes like this:

On New Year’s Eve, make a telephone call from one time zone to another to conduct a conversation between people located in different years.

December 31, 2019 is year 44 of the project. On New Year’s Eve 1975, Friedman, from his home in Springfield, Ohio, called his fellow artists Dick Higgins, Nam June Paik, Peter Frank, Christo and Jeanne-Claude in New York, where his friends had already welcomed in 1976. Then after midnight in Springfield, Friedman called to Tom Garver, Natasha Nicholson, and Abraham Friedman, who were still finishing out 1975 in California.

The Fluxus spirit of Mr. Friedman’s score is alive and well today, although his piece takes many more forms now than phone calls. Television broadcasts, social media posts, and texts are just some of the adaptations that fit within the parameters of Mr. Friedman’s idea: connected individuals communicating between years.

Also fulfilling the Fluxus spirit of In One Year and Out the Other: people across the world activate the score without even knowing it. So whether you’re an artist or not, give someone in a different time zone a call on New Year’s Eve and begin 2019 with Mr. Friedman’s gracious artwork.

Mr. Friedman is the co-editor of a book of selected writings by Fluxus artist Dick Higgins. Read Michael Galbreth’s review of that book for Glasstire here.

The post You, Too, Can Perform Ken Friedman’s “In One Year and Out the Other” on New Year’s Eve appeared first on Glasstire.

I'm a boring person who likes boring planners.

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If you'd like the experience of seeing wonderful stuff you desire but just always a bit out of reach, please enjoy browsing Pinterest.

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The next time someone tells you they want to remember a moment forever, just shout 'dolphin dongs!' as loud as you can.

I'd sleep more, but what's the point?

Tonight's comic couldn't sleep for some reason.

Happy Holidays, everyone!