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30 Nov 20:49

i like to imagine the person who has been reading dinosaur comics for over a decade, being all "oh wow, a scene from a universe where hats didn't get invented until just now! FINALLY"

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November 27th, 2015: DON'T WORRY IF YOU'RE AT WORK: I have a (partial) solution for you!! It covers the top half of the problem, anyway.

Hey, speaking of shirts (kinda), guess what, I made a new shirt! It's really great! You can get it for ONE WEEK ONLY. :0

– Ryan

30 Nov 20:48

aj513 says FML

by aj513

Today, my girlfriend and I got caught doing it in her parent's bed by her mom. Instead of making me leave, they forced me to stay for dinner. FML

30 Nov 20:47

"Poorly Drawn Lines" Is Now A Book And It's Just Wonderful

by Daniel Dalton
Philip.paulsson

Hehe classic.

“What are you thinking about, little duck?”

Poorly Drawn Lines is a popular web comic by San Francisco artist Reza Farazmand.

Poorly Drawn Lines is a popular web comic by San Francisco artist Reza Farazmand.

Reza Farazmand / Plume Books

Farazmand told BuzzFeed he started posting the comics in college, but only "got serious about it" in 2012, when he started posting three times a week.

Farazmand told BuzzFeed he started posting the comics in college, but only "got serious about it" in 2012, when he started posting three times a week.

Reza Farazmand / Plume Books

With his unique mix of wit, silliness, and social commentary, he quickly built a loyal readership, and started working on PDL full time in 2013.

With his unique mix of wit, silliness, and social commentary, he quickly built a loyal readership, and started working on PDL full time in 2013.

Reza Farazmand / Plume Books

On his prodigious output, Farazmand said: "I have to get all these ideas out or they'll eat me up from the inside in an attempt to escape. It's a matter of survival."

On his prodigious output, Farazmand said: "I have to get all these ideas out or they'll eat me up from the inside in an attempt to escape. It's a matter of survival."

Reza Farazmand / Plume Books


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30 Nov 14:37

President signs pro-asteroid mining bill into law

by Jon Fingas
And just like that, American asteroid mining efforts are legal. President Obama has signed the US Commercial Space Launch Competitiveness Act (CSLCA) into law following Congress' approval, letting companies keep whatever resources they collect beyond...
30 Nov 13:02

Food Combinations

Philip.paulsson

LOL @ hover text

If anyone tries this on you, the best reply is a deadpan "Oh yeah, that's a common potato chip flavor in Canada."
30 Nov 05:53

People Debated Whether Mustard Or Ketchup Is The Best Condiment

by Colin Weatherby
Philip.paulsson

Team Mustard

And let’s not even get into the mayonnaise discussion.

BuzzFeed Video / Via youtube.com

30 Nov 05:35

American Women Are Drinking More And Men Are Drinking Less

by David Mack
Philip.paulsson

Ladies be boozing

Getty Images

Not only are more American women drinking alcohol but an increasing number of them are drinking more regularly, according to a new federal study, which has found that longstanding differences on alcohol consumption between the genders may be narrowing.

The increase in alcohol consumption has medical officials concerned because it puts women at a greater risk for alcohol-related illnesses, the National Institutes of Health (NIH) said Monday.

"Males still consume more alcohol, but the differences between men and women are diminishing," Dr. Aaron White, a senior scientific advisor to the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism (NIAAA), said in a statement.

White and his team reviewed data from yearly national surveys conducted between 2002 to 2012, and published their findings in the Alcoholism: Clinical and Experimental Research journal.

"We found that over that period of time, differences in measures such as current drinking, number of drinking days per month, reaching criteria for an alcohol use disorder, and driving under the influence of alcohol in the past year, all narrowed for females and males," White said.

Researchers found the number of people who reported drinking alcohol in the past 30 days increased for women from 44.9% to 48.3%, but decreased for men from 57.4% to 56.1%.

Additionally, women increased their number of drinking days each month from 6.8 to 7.3 days, while the days declined for men from 9.9 to 9.5.

While the rates of binge drinking (which the NIAAA says typically occurs for women after four drinks and five drinks for men in about a two hour period) did not increase for 18 to 25 year olds in college, researchers reported a "significant increase" in women binge drinking and a significant decrease for men.

“This study confirms what other recent reports have suggested about changing patterns of alcohol use by men and women in the U.S.,” said NIAAA Director Dr. George F. Koob.

Koon said women are at a greater risk of developing illnesses linked to alcohol, such as liver inflammation, cardiovascular disease, neurotoxicity, and cancer.

"Reasons for converging patterns of alcohol use are unclear and do not appear to be easily explainable by recent trends in employment status, pregnancy status, or marital status," researchers wrote.

The report's authors said more research was needed to identify the factors driving the shift in drinking.

30 Nov 05:22

Everything Is Working Out Nicely For Phuc Dat Bich

by Brad Esposito

Vietnamese-Australian man Phuc Dat Bich made headlines last week after posting a photo of his passport to Facebook.

facebook.com

Bich posted the photo back in January, with a message saying he was sick and tired of having his name being mispronounced and becoming the butt of jokes.

"I've been accused of using a false and misleading name which I find very offensive," he wrote. "Is it because I'm Asian? Is it?"

Yesterday, Bich wrote to his growing fanbase, thanking them for their support.

Facebook: profile.php

The post has been shared a few hundred times since, and Bich is getting plenty of support in the comments.

Facebook: profile.php

Since going viral, Bich has racked up over 35,000 followers on Facebook. So at least something's working out.


30 Nov 05:21

Phuc Dat Bich admits hoax in Facebook name battle

Picture of Phuc Dat Bich's passport Image copyright 'Phuc Dat Bich'
Image caption Phuc Dat Bich later thanked people who were supportive of "certain names that populate in different cultures"

An Australian calling himself Phuc Dat Bich who made global headlines after saying he was fighting to use his real name on Facebook admits it was hoax.

"Mr Bich" said on Facebook his real name was "Joe Carr" (or perhaps joker).

He said what had started as a joke between friends "became a prank that made a fool out of the media".

But he said it also brought out the best in people and gave encouragement to people with "truly interesting and idiosyncratic names".

Facebook have not responded to BBC requests for comment.

Phooled by a Joe Carr - Nga Pham, BBC Vietnamese

I have to admit I fell for the prank by Mr Bich Phuc Joe, or whoever he is.

In the newsroom, dealing day-in-day-out with news that's often about disasters, both natural and man-made, the story of an unfortunately named person who thanked the community for their support seemed appealing.

Being Vietnamese, I knew that Bich was not a common surname (but not impossible) in Vietnam, but many immigrants change their names or get them in the wrong order when registering in their new countries. Vietnamese names are highly confusing to say the least.

After the story came out on the BBC News website, I received many emails from readers saying it had made them laugh - I hope they are still laughing now, even though we've all been hoaxed.

Media captionThe BBC's Nga Pham explains how to pronounce the Vietnamese name Phuc Dat Bich

The Facebook user, whose profile still shows him as Phuc Dat Bich, had said back in January that he found it "highly irritating the fact that nobody seems to believe me when I say that my full legal name is how you see it".

He posted a picture of his passport showing his name, and said he had had his Facebook account "shut down multiple times". Posts under that name date back to at least 2014.

'Levity and humanity'

The story was picked up last week - first by social media then by the world's media, including by the BBC.

Earlier this week, he even went as far as thanking his supporters, saying he hoped he had "played a part in brightening your days".

But in a surprise on Wednesday he said: "Do you remember the story; The boy who cried wolf?

"Imagine that boy grew up into a mischievous man with 21st Century technology at his finger tips.

"What started as a joke between friends, became a prank that made a fool out of the media.

Image copyright Facebook
Image caption Mr Phuc received thousands of new followers over the weekend

But he also said Facebook "needs to understand that it is utterly impossible to legitimise a place where there will always be pranksters and tricksters".

Mr Bich/Carr said his "ordeal" had taught him "not to trust the credibility of the media" and that it "goes to show that an average joe like myself can con the biggest news sources with ease".

But he also praised the response to his prank saying it "didn't bring out the anger and darkness that we often see on the internet, but it brought a levity and humanity in a time we need it most."

It is not clear if he photoshopped his passport. Physically altering a valid passport would be illegal.

30 Nov 03:50

The Ballad of the Repo Trader

Philip.paulsson

This probably is only funny to like, 100 people, but I've already been sent it 4 times.

Times are tough for traders in the so-called repo market, where a wide variety of banks and investors pawn their assets in exchange for short-term loans. The market was ground zero for the financial crisis, with a pullback in repo funding blamed for Lehman Brother's collapse. New rules implemented in the wake of the crisis have seen a dramatic decline in repo usage in recent years, with many now looking to shrinking repo to help explain a series of recent dislocations in the wider market.

If repo traders were inclined to write ballads, we think this is what they might say.

-----

Oh, it sucks to be a repo guy in post-financial crisis days,
New rules are being implemented, and everything’s a haze.
Regulators have no sympathy (for them our goose is cooked),
But stick with me, oh reader, I think some things are overlooked.

For years I’ve been a repo trader, this is what I do,
I’m the oil that greases markets (you all know it’s true).
A hedge fund has an asset, whatever that might be,
They come to me for financing, and I help them out, you see.

Like a pawnshop in Harlem, collateral is my game,
(If you want to be specific, “matched book repo” is the name)
For years I’ve done my thing, I’m liquidity to a T,
But things are getting harder, it’s not easy being me!

The turning point, I think, was back in two thousand eight,
We all got a little nervous, and that helped seal our fate.
A pullback in the repo market meant one big funding crunch,
An investment bank collapsed (and we all ate their lunch).

Stuff went down with Lehman Bros., it took a little dive
But lots has changed since then, there's no more 105.
A litany of woes have I endured, some sympathy would be nice;
I set them out before you, maybe you have some advice.

Regulators do not like us repo guys, that much I do know,
They decided to take aim at us with the net stable funding ratio.
Instead of holding capital against all our riskier stuff,
We have to hold it against everything—it is truly very rough!

Then we have the Fed, you see, they’ve muscled in as well,
RRPs are fine by me (I’ll see you all in repo hell).
Bill Dudley wants us to reform, we are trying to do our best,
But how do you have a clearing house with no backstop for stress?

Doing my job is harder now, please shed a tear for me,
I’ve had to tell my clients that I can’t do stuff for free.
Prime brokerage is more difficult, the hedgies are all mad,
My business is in tatters—I’m a repo guy gone bad!

My market has been shrinking, it’s so embarrassing,
Other traders point and laugh (I was in the pool, I scream),
There’s other strange stuff that’s happening, you should really take glance,
Look at swap spreads in the red, for instance, a very strange happenstance.

I’d like to urge the regulators to reconsider what they’ve wrought,
Basel III can’t be undone, but us repo guys think it ought.
Broken repo markets are no good, you see, especially for me,
They’re not great for U.S. debt, either, won’t somebody think of Treasury?

Perhaps I should give up, there’s no compassion to be had,
In the words of one of my brethren, it’s “game over,” don’t be sad.
You've listened to my story so here's a takeaway I plea: 
The next time a swap spread’s negative, I hope you think of me!

25 Nov 14:45

These "Extendable Arms" For Selfies Are Vaguely Terrifying

by Anna Menta
Philip.paulsson

Awesome.

Why must we play God?

If you've ever wished you had really, really long arms to step up your selfie game, this Japanese blogger has an invention for you.

If you've ever wished you had really, really long arms to step up your selfie game, this Japanese blogger has an invention for you.

He explained his process behind his version of the Selfie stick on the Japanese blog Omocoro.

Mansoon / Via omocoro.jp

The device is a little... off-putting.

The device is a little... off-putting.

Mansoon / Via omocoro.jp

Nothing weird about these arms. Total normal arm-length right here.

Nothing weird about these arms. Total normal arm-length right here.

Mansoon / Via omocoro.jp

Can you imagine being out in public and seeing this rise above the crowd?

Can you imagine being out in public and seeing this rise above the crowd?

Mansoon / Via omocoro.jp


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23 Nov 21:07

The Official Trailer For "Zoolander 2" Has Dropped And It Features Benedict Cumberbatch Without Eyebrows

by Ellie Bate
Philip.paulsson

Awesome. And did they use poot Lovato??

Zoolander and Hansel are officially back.

It's been 15 years since the release of the first Zoolander film, and a whole nine months since it was announced that the long-awaited sequel is set for release in February 2016.

It's been 15 years since the release of the first Zoolander film, and a whole nine months since it was announced that the long-awaited sequel is set for release in February 2016.

Paramount Pictures

But we have finally been blessed with a full theatrical trailer, and as well as dropping some hints about the film's plot, it features some seriously exciting guest stars.

But we have finally been blessed with a full theatrical trailer, and as well as dropping some hints about the film's plot, it features some seriously exciting guest stars.

Paramount Pictures

Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson will of course reprise their roles as Derek Zoolander and Hansel, and Will Ferrell is returning as the ~evil villain~ Mugatu.

Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson will of course reprise their roles as Derek Zoolander and Hansel, and Will Ferrell is returning as the ~evil villain~ Mugatu.

Paramount Pictures


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23 Nov 16:54

This Senator Thanked Australia's Childless Taxpayers In A Speech About Anti-Vaxxers

by Rob Stott

David Leyonhjelm was speaking in favour of a bill targeting anti-vaxxers.

Libertarian senator David Leyonhjelm has spoken out in support of what he says are the forgotten Australians: Childless families.

youtube.com

The senator said Australian politicians had become "obsessed" with working families, and often overlooked childless households, which make up the majority of Australian homes.

"To the childless people of Australia I want to say, on behalf of this parliament, thank you for being childless," Senator Leyonhjelm said. "You work for more years and become more productive than the rest of Australia."

"You pay thousands and thousands of dollars more tax than other Australians. You get next to no welfare and your use of public services is minimal. But you pay when other people get pregnant. You pay when other people give birth. You pay when they stay at home to look after their offspring. You pay for the child's food clothing and shelter." he said.

"Thank you for all you do for Australia. I'm sorry you're often ignored, pitied, considered strange or even thought of as being irresponsible."

The senator then spoke in support of the "no jab, no play" policy, which will deny benefits to parents who don't immunise their children.

The senator then spoke in support of the "no jab, no play" policy, which will deny benefits to parents who don't immunise their children.

Mick Tsikas / AAPIMAGE

"It's bad enough that people continue to bring wave upon wave of these little blighters into the world," Senator Leyonhjelm said. "The least they can do is immunise their bundles of dribble and sputum so they don't make the rest of us sick."

"Immunisation generates a significant social benefit, and parents do not have a right to welfare payments. Such payments are fundamentally a gift from their fellow Australians. No work is done for the money, so there's nothing wrong with placing conditions on it."


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22 Nov 00:43

22 Vines That Prove Kids Are Pretty Much Just Tiny Drunk Adults

by Tanner Greenring
Philip.paulsson

#10 why is he wearing so many seatbelts???

Sir, I think you’ve had enough.

They can't handle themselves in public.

vine.co

Their motor control is really terrible.

vine.co

They get confused easily.

vine.co

They shouldn't be trusted behind the wheel of a car.

vine.co


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20 Nov 18:12

The Hardest "National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation" Quiz You'll Ever Take

by Rachel Goerke

“I don’t know what to say, except it’s Christmas and we’re all in misery.”

20 Nov 17:34

'Hotline Miami' sale benefits the artists behind those wild soundtracks

by Jessica Conditt
Philip.paulsson

Great game.

Hotline Miami and Hotline Miami 2: Wrong Number are both dense, addictive and brutal -- and a lot of those adjectives come courtesy of the games' soundtracks. In recognition of this musical magnificence, Dennaton Games is holding a sale this weeken...
20 Nov 17:29

Sony's adding PlayStation 2 backwards compatibility to the PS4

by Timothy J. Seppala
Philip.paulsson

Awesome

Sony and Electronic Arts have a Star Wars: Battlefront PlayStation 4 bundle available right now and with it comes a quartet of games from a long time ago and a galaxy far, far away (or at least as far as the PlayStation 2 era). Star Wars: Bounty Hu...
20 Nov 16:28

You Need To Watch 5,000 Ducklings Run Into A Pond Right Now

by Candace Lowry
Philip.paulsson

I want to know why.

RIGHT NOW, DAMMIT.

This Chinese pond just got the greatest experience it will ever have in its little, algae-covered life: 5,000 ducklings running into it.

youtube.com

Prep yourselves, people...

youtube.com


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20 Nov 16:00

Doctors want ban on prescription drug, device advertisements

by Beth Mole
Philip.paulsson

Yes please.

Nothing says erectile dysfunction treatment like a couple in two bathtubs overlooking the ocean. (credit: DisneylandDini20/YouTube)

If you think a drug you saw on a commercial is right for you, talk with your doctor about the problems with drug advertisements.

On Tuesday, the American Medical Association (AMA) called for a ban on direct-to-consumer advertisements for prescription drugs and medical devices. Such ads drive demand and costs for expensive name-brand treatments when those drugs may not be appropriate or when clinically effective, low-cost options are available, the doctors group said. The announcement is part of a larger effort by the association to make prescription drugs more affordable.

“Today’s vote in support of an advertising ban reflects concerns among physicians about the negative impact of commercially-driven promotions, and the role that marketing costs play in fueling escalating drug prices,” AMA Board Chair-elect Patrice A. Harris said in a news release.

Read 3 remaining paragraphs | Comments

20 Nov 15:59

Cool Hat

by Reza

cool-hat

20 Nov 15:59

Criminal Mind

20 Nov 14:51

13 Celebrities Who Really Have Some Nerve

by Ellie Sunakawa
Philip.paulsson

Fuck Guy Fee-eddy. Dick.

Everything you thought you knew is a lie.

Guy Ramsay Ferry

Guy Ramsay Ferry

That specific Italian "Fieri" pronunciation? FAKE. IT'S FERRY. LIKE THE FUCKING BOAT.

wikipedia.org

David Lubega

David Lubega

How DARE you, sir?

wikipedia.org

Caryn Elaine Johnson

Caryn Elaine Johnson

I'm honestly livid about this, CARYN.

wikipedia.org

Jonathan Taylor Weiss

Jonathan Taylor Weiss

Are you fucking telling me this whole time it's been JTW and not JTT?

wikipedia.org


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19 Nov 20:49

This Dog Smiling For The Camera Is The Happy You Need Today

by Chelsea Marshall
Philip.paulsson

Amazing.

Dead.

You ready to smile?? Good, 'cause you won't be able to help it in 2 seconds.

View Video ›

Facebook: video.php

At first you're like, "oh it's a normal dog being patient with his human..."

At first you're like, "oh it's a normal dog being patient with his human..."

Facebook: morefmnz

AND THEN NOPE HE SMILES ON CUE LIKE THE CUTEST GOOD BOY IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD.

AND THEN NOPE HE SMILES ON CUE LIKE THE CUTEST GOOD BOY IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD.

Facebook: morefmnz

YOU GUYS WE FOUND HIM. WE FOUND THE GOOD BOY.

YOU GUYS WE FOUND HIM. WE FOUND THE GOOD BOY.

Facebook: morefmnz


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19 Nov 15:29

Air Force torch cuts through locks like hot butter

by Jon Fingas
Firefighters, police and soldiers don't have many good options when they want to breach a door: blowtorches and lock picks are usually slow, while battering rams, explosives and guns aren't exactly subtle. The US Air Force and EMPI recently crafted...
19 Nov 15:29

Anonymous goes to war with ISIS over Paris attacks

by Andrew Tarantola
In the wake of ISIS' coordinated attacks on Paris Friday night that left 129 civilians dead and scores more injured, the loosely-affiliated hacker collective known as Anonymous announced Sunday the launch of a massive cyber-campaign, dubbed #OPPari...
18 Nov 17:38

News in Brief: Economists Recommend Setting Aside Part Of Every Paycheck In Case Of Dire Straits Reunion Tour

WASHINGTON—Describing the precaution as a financially prudent decision for all households, a panel of the nation’s top economists recommended Wednesday that Americans set aside money from each paycheck so they will be ready in the event Dire Straits reunites for a tour. “We suggest placing a small percentage of your earnings into a separate account to ensure you have adequate savings should Dire Straits unexpectedly announce a string of North American concert dates to promote a new greatest-hits double album,” said Princeton University economics professor Julia Bridges, adding that at any moment, an unforeseen reconciliation between singer-guitarist Mark Knopfler and bassist John Illsley could precipitate a reunion that would leave millions scrambling to cover the cost of presale tickets. “While this year saw the 30th anniversary of Brothers In Arms pass by uneventfully, that still doesn’t rule out the possibility of the band’s first tour since ...











18 Nov 13:22

Literally Just A Bunch Of Really Funny Tumblr Posts

by Jamie Jones
Philip.paulsson

These are pretty good.

“I really want to buy one of these grocery checkout dividers but the lady behind the counter keeps putting it back.”


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18 Nov 12:54

13 Very Honest Confessions From People Having A Quarter-Life Crisis

by Crystal Ro
Philip.paulsson

I'm hoping my quarter life crisis hits next year.

“It feels like I’m swimming in an ocean with no idea which way to go.”

View Video ›

whisper.sh

View Video ›

whisper.sh

View Video ›

whisper.sh

View Video ›

whisper.sh


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18 Nov 12:32

Anonymous says FML

by Anonymous

Today, I excitedly told my husband that I'm pregnant with our first child. With the most shit-eating grin, he said, "Hi, Pregnant. I'm dad." FML

18 Nov 02:07

Lego Is Now Making Extra-Padded Lego-Proof Slippers Because They Feel Your Pain

by Alison Caporimo
Philip.paulsson

Hahah can't believe it took this long!

There’s pain and then there’s stepping on a Lego.

If you've ever stepped on a Lego brick, you know that it's BRUTAL.

If you've ever stepped on a Lego brick, you know that it's BRUTAL.

knowyourmeme.com

LEGO? MORE LIKE LAND MINE.

LEGO? MORE LIKE LAND MINE.

"MY FOOT HAS NEVER KNOWN SUCH A FIRE."—actual thing you probably said in the heat of the moment.

someecards.com

HOW MANY LIVES HAVE TO BE LOST, PEOPLE???

HOW MANY LIVES HAVE TO BE LOST, PEOPLE???

Ohhhhh the painnnn.

imgur.com

Which is why Lego is making extra-padded slippers BECAUSE IT'S ABOUT DAMN TIME.

Which is why Lego is making extra-padded slippers BECAUSE IT'S ABOUT DAMN TIME.

Don the slippers—which are interchangeable between right and left feet because who cares about such things when you're in danger—and you can walk around your own home without the fear of stepping on a shard or two of the dastardly toy.

PIWEE / Via Instagram: @www.instagram.com/p/-JzAqkpvAF/?tagged=legoslippers


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