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Broadside Ballads were made for entertainment, and I've had great fun going through the Bodleian library for them.

In order, here is where you can find the originals:

The School of Venus
The Rambling Boy
The Mourning Conquest
The Rambling Boys of Pleasure
Unconstant Phillis
Toby Philpot


Broadside illustrations were often used over again for different songs, so it's not unusual to see them pop up in new places, though perhaps comic riffs is a new one. The drawings are funny to our modern eyes, but give a little browse through the Bodleian, or the University of California's collection, and you're sure to find something funny and smart and very interesting and 200 years old. And clearly, boobs and dicks and things were always a crowd pleaser, happy am I to carry this torch.

We have new things coming in the store very soon, so keep your eyes peeled! Or also, check my tumblr now and then! There are also drawings and other things on there.

I know not everyone is a merchandise sort of person, so I added a donate button below for the people who have told me here and there over the years that they'd like to support Hark A Vagrant in another way. Which is really kind! I thought about Patreon, and maybe that will come about sometime, but with my sporadic update schedule, I am never sure.

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SPOKANE, WA—Grateful to have a couple of days free from his job responsibilities, sales representative Sam Roslindale told reporters Friday that he likes to use his weekends to make entirely different mistakes than he does during the workweek.

An unidentified man posing as a member of Congress made it into a secure area backstage at President Barack Obama’s appearance at a Congressional Black Caucus Foundation awards dinner in Washington Sept. 27, according to a White House official.

The HMS Erebus set sail from England on a voyage to find the elusive Northwest Passage linking the Atlantic to the Pacific via the Arctic seas off northern Canada. It was never seen again, but for years afterwards, Inuit hunters told tales of starving white men spotted in the freezing wilderness.

With the booming Sriracha cultural obsession, the rooster is now a tongue-in-cheek enhancement for dozens of everyday items like water bottles, iphone cases and cycling socks.

BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRGGGGGGEEEER

In so many sectors of American life the economy was on the downturn, but seemingly every third shuttered business reopened as a punnily named source for frozen cultures. What kind of black magic was this? How did they get into our heads and hearts? I set out to break down the stores by the numbers.

LOS ALTOS, CA—Having reached nearly 2 million downloads within its first month of release, the new smartphone app ProMiler has quickly become one of the nation’s most popular exercise tools by informing users that they ran five miles each day ...

Go home all other masks, this mask is the best mask.

Read more...

Apparently some people didn’t get the hint last month when Jessica Williams discussed the annoying and often scary encounter that is catcalling to a captivated Daily Show audience—but then, what else is new? So she decided to follow up with a fantastic taped segment, complete with hidden camera and a giant panel of women recounting their own (really disgusting) experiences. Bless you, Jessica Williams. We’d follow you into your feminized atmosphere any day of the week.

(via Jezebel)

Previously in

• The Daily Show’s Jessica Williams Hilariously Destroys Catcalls
• Politics Sexist? Hilary Clinton Discriminated Against Because She’s A Woman? You Don’t Say, The Daily Show!
• Patrick Stewart Plays Sad Dying Moon Rover In Career High on The Daily Show

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A very clever Great Dane named Bambi quickly figures out how to open the baby gate that was put in place to keep her extra-large frame off of the sofa. According to her human John Kuntz, the baby gate may not have been the best way to accomplish the objective.

We set this gate up to keep our Great Dane Bambi, off the couch. Apparently the safety gate is not Dane proof

via reddit, Daily Picks and Flicks

Courtney shared this story from Super Opinionated.

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Vancouver, Washington’s “Old Apple Tree” turns 188-years-old this weekend. To celebrate, the city’s throwing its annual party. As the story goes, the tree is the matriarch of the state’s apple industry. It dates back to 1826, just two years after the Hudson’s Bay Company established Fort Vancouver. The tree is the oldest living apple tree in the Pacific Northwest, said Jessica Antoine, outreach coordinator with Vancouver Urban Forestry. “It’s the last living remnant from the Fort Vancouver era,” she said, noting the fort was the first settlement in the Northwest. “Something that’s still living from that era is pretty significant.”

Days before he left Liberia, Duncan had helped carry to a taxi a pregnant woman who later died of Ebola, according to neighbors. Her illness at the time was believed to be pregnancy-related. At the time Duncan left for the U.S., it's not clear if he knew of the woman's diagnosis. "He will be prosecuted" when he returns to Liberia, Binyah Kesselly, chairman of the board of directors of the Liberia Airport Authority, told reporters. He said that people like Duncan and Patrick Sawyer, a Liberian-American with Ebola who traveled to Nigeria and infected people there, have brought a "stigma" upon Liberians living abroad.

For the past six weeks, about 800 to 1,000 doses of an experimental ebola vaccine have been sitting in a Canadian laboratory instead of being dispensed to West Africa. The delay, it would now appear, may be on account of an intellectual property spat.

Read more...

In a new post on The Daily Stormer, a white supremacist blog, Weev recalls what he learned from his time in prison—apparently a deep hatred of Jews, black people, and other significant portions of society—and reveals a giant swastika tattoo on his chest. The man is known for deliberately offending as many people as possible with racism, antisemitism, and other forms of inflammatory hate speech. But for years now, it's been chalked up to his self-professed "troll" status. But the line between Hey, just trolling! and This man is an open fascist is clearly artificial one.

thepaperplaneofexistence:

It’s not even nine o’clock and it’s already been a long day

Starting in late November, Ueno Royal Museum in Tokyo is set to host an Attack on Titan exhibit that will feature original manuscripts from the manga, a life-sized model of the Colossal Titan (though probably not to actual Colossal-scale), and VR headsets that allow visitors to simulate life as a survey corp member. But how do you successfully  advertise for a series that’s mostly about giant monsters eating people without making anyone lose their lunch? By adding some lunch, of course!

The above and below ads, which feature grotesque people-eating scenes from the manga being censored by badly photoshopped food, have reportedly appeared in Roppongi Station in Tokyo.

Kotaku reports that the banner at the top of each add, which reads  自主規制中, roughly translates to “voluntary regulation.” And people say that self-censorship is a bad thing.

Of course, this type of humor is surprisingly common surrounding the Attack on Titan franchise, because the series is so grim and horrific that you can’t help but use it as a vehicle for hilarity. Case in point? Go find yourself a copy of the official AoT Junior High AU spin-off series, which is a real thing that series creator Hajime Isayama actually spent time making. It is nonsense.

(via Kotaku)

Previously in Attack on Titan

• The Apocalyptic Anime Showdown—Attack on Titan vs Nausicaä of the Valley of the Wind
• First Trailer for Attack on Titan Prequel Hints at Levi’s Origin Story
• Bloodiest Timeline: Attack On Titan New Season, 2 Movies Rumored

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This. This is the kind of shit we were talking about when we suggested that maybe Reddit’s new investor dollars could help them respond more quickly to awful things that are happening on the site. Massive, massive trigger warning.

Thankfully, response to the subreddit “The Philosophy of Rape” by Reddit’s own users in the comments has been negative across the board. It appears the entire thing was started five days ago by a single user, also named ThePhilosophyOfRape, whose “philosophy” hinges on the loose assertion that women have too much confidence and need to be taught a lesson. Until now, I didn’t know it was possible to gag on your own words while typing.

Here, I’ll just quote from the subreddit’s first post, typos and all, so I don’t have to try to explain the unexplainable:

Rape served a very important function in mitigating female behavior and keeping it in check. Back in the time of prehistory, a woman couldn’t behave as shamelessly slutty as she can today, because of the risk of catching the eye of the wrong male. But now, with “consent” laws barring nature back, and feminism and sexual-liberation perverting whole generations of hearts and minds, we find ourselves in a situation gone way, way, too far.

These harpies need to be humbled. And for their own good. Like the child with absolutely no boundaries and no discipline, they may feel they yearn for no rules, but become absolutely lost without an adult to tell them no! If you’ve ever met such a kid, the type who can have anyone over, at anytime, and do anything, is miserable. The insertion of an authority figure who deals out punishment is met with intense anger and resistance. But the discipline is what was so badly needed. The slaps and smacks may smart, but it helps the child have some semblance of direction as they develop.

These hussies are so far gone, living in a world that is a virtual macrocosm for them of the home for the child with the completely negligent, permissive parent. Disciplinary smacks and slaps come in a different form for these more grown children (college women), since the situation was more extreme in permissiveness and went on for more years. But the curing power of good ol’ fashion physical strength wielded to correct can not be understated.

It’s not only morally justifiable to rape such a woman, it’s and brave.

At the risk of stating the obvious, this isn’t true for all female human beings. We’re not talking about nuns or grandmothers or humble, married, women of twenty years.

We’re talking about filthy, unmitigated, sluts. Oblivious and loud. Shameless. Belligerent. Entitled. Selfie taking, Tindr-whoring, Teenage-walking-herpes-sores. We are talking about bad, bad, individuals. Unruly, neglicted, children, run-amok. That badly need to be punished. Badly.

For the good of society these women need to be raped.
Here we will teach how to do it safely.

Yes. Someone has certainly gone too far and is, “Oblivious and loud. Shameless. Belligerent. Entitled.” Yes, that person should absolutely be shown that society will not accept their behavior, and that person is ThePhilosophyOfRape. He seems to be the only person actually posting in the subreddit aside from comments telling him how awful he is, which is as close to anything in this whole situation gets to something positive.

Please, Reddit, do something about this. I’m very much in favor of a site of user-generated content and freedom of expression, but that comes with a responsibility to make the hard (or in this case incredibly goddam easy) decision of what is acceptable as free speech and what cannot be tolerated. Reddit needs to be quicker about this process.

As Redditor Balegrim put it:

You know guy’s.[sic] The admins of Reddit haven’t removed this guy’s account yet or stripped his content. If they don’t, we might as well start various Reddits dedicated to letting them know EXACTLY how we feel about their tolerance for this kind of behavior.

I can’t even begin to try to explain how someone would create a subreddit or write a manifesto like that seriously. My brain immediately wants to classify it as trolling, but as the subreddit only gets worse from there, it appears to be 100% serious. It attempts to justify rape with accounts of how women have enjoyed being raped and even includes a fictional first-person narrative of such an event (from the imagination of ThePhilosophyOfRape, of course). I can’t even bring myself to quote it here, but you can see it on Reddit at your own risk.

If that’s not enough, TPOR has also commented on the MRA TheRedPill subreddit that he’s “corrected” seven women and convinced another man to rape one more, which is an admission of committing several felonies. I can only hope that it’s empty boasting. Please, please let that be the case, but either way, something needs to be done about this. No one should give this person the idea that this is acceptable or encouraged, whether it’s trolling, empty boastful nonsense, or anything else.

Meanwhile, hackers are making use of Reddit comments to connect Mac computers to a botnet with malware, which allows the hackers to use the infected machines to launch spam attacks on individuals or to take down entire websites with DDoS attacks. So, you’re up, Reddit. You’ve just secured $50 million in investor funds that you’ve said is to better address issues with your site, so put that money where these jerks’ mouths are.

(via Raw Story, image PathDoc via Shutterstock )

Previously in gross, Reddit

• Snoop Dogg and Jared Leto were among Reddit’s investors
• Man, Reddit made a lot of money off of another crime
• The creator of Reddit’s stolen nude section didn’t like a violation of his privacy

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Pizza Hut is celebrating 30 years of their “BOOK IT” program. WHAT? Crazy, I know. But that means those of us who remember it fondly get a free pizza. AND YOU DON’T EVEN HAVE TO READ ANY BOOKS! Wait…I actually liked that part!

First of all, do you remember BOOK IT? Is it a thing people you knew participated in? It was one of the most memorable things about my childhood but I’m not sure how widespread it was. Pizza Hut’s Twitter account says 1 in 5 Americans participated over the last thirty years. I loved it so much I bought a replica BOOK IT necklace on Etsy a few years ago.

From what I recall, we were introduced to it through my school. You got a snazzy holographic button and for each book you read, you got a star sticker. Once you got ten you were elidgable for a free pizza at Pizza Hut. Your mileage may vary on pizza tastings but Pizza Hut was the new shiny thing when I was young and even though my father RAN AN ITALIAN RESTAURANT WHERE HE MADE PIZZA DAILY, I was completely addicted to the stuff.

As it turns out, the program has certainly grown through the years (check out the FAQ here). CNN Money says “the longest-running corporate-supported reading program in the country, and has engaged educators for more than three decades to aid in the effort of helping 60 million children read more than 54 billion minutes” and this anniversary celebration will introduce “a $30,000 College Plan, releasing its first reading App.”

But now I get to experience the joy all over again?? With some Tums, probably.

Calling all doctors, farmers, teachers, celebrities, engineers and adults from different backgrounds who were once BOOK IT! kids. We want to hear from you!

To celebrate the 30th birthday of BOOK IT!, we are launching an Alumni Program for all previous participants. BOOK IT! is on a quest to find and engage alumni from around the world, so sign up today to receive a nostalgic favorite from your BOOK IT! days, a free one-topping Personal Pan Pizza for carryout only when redeemed online at participating U.S. Pizza Hut restaurants.

I did it! OMG it’s happening.

With the alumni program you don’t have to read any books, but I wholeheartedly suggest it. Even better, buy a book for a kid you know.

In order to get the free pizza you just have to give them a few bits of info, including where you went to elementary school. You can sign up at http://bookitprogram.com/alumni but you have to do it by October 8. You’ll then receive a coupon for a free Personal Pan Pizza, redeemable from Oct. 1-10.

(via The Daily Dot)

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Not every dog owner likes to clean up after his or her pet. Fecal land mines are menacing enough to some neighborhoods that there are now fines and dog feces DNA tests to nab regular offenders. But just how much damage does a canine friend’s stray bowel movements actually do?

It’s harder to tell than you might think. The microbiotia in dog excrement is remarkably similar to that of human excrement, which makes it tricky to test for dog feces in, say, a puddle of water that eventually enters your kitchen faucet. But after years of research (pdf), Orin Shanks, a research geneticist at the US Environmental Protection Agency, and his colleagues may have finally cracked the code on dog feces’ unique characteristics. Shanks discovered 11 genetic markers that only appear in a dog’s excrement, opening the door to research on its environmental effects.

Upon initial testing of storm water collected near a garden that sees its fair share of pooches, the Shanks test successfully identified the number two that should be a dog owner’s number one priority to collect.

It could be a popular product. The issue is so important to the state of Pennsylvania that it holds a competition for “Philly Water’s Best Friend Spokesdog.” The winner—the dog with the best smile and the most charm—and its owner are paraded around town as role models to raise awareness about the damage fecal matter does to the river and local potable water.

Available on Etsy!

Yesterday Rolling Stone Magazine released a profile of Pendleton Ward, the series creator and former showrunner of Adventure Time. Yup, that’s right, former; according to the article, he stepped down in Season 5 because he could no longer handle the stress of running such a successful show. But it’s okay, we promise!

Ward explains his decision:

“To spend that extra energy and time you don’t have, to make something that’s worth making, to make it awesome, wears you out,” he says. [...] “It’s a beast of a show. And the more popular it gets, the more the ancillary things – like the merchandise and games and everything – keep getting bigger.”

And so, Ward confesses, one day during Season Five, unbeknownst to his fans, “I quit because it was driving me nuts.”

He says this not with sadness or frustration, but with relief. “For me, having quality of life outweighed the need to control this project and make it great all the time.”

Here, want to feel sadder? Because they also asked Ice King voice actor Tom Kenny about Ward, and he compares the situation to that of Simon becoming the Ice King. How dare you, sir.

“I would guess that the way the Ice King feels like he’s going mad and things are spinning out of his control, that must be what it’s like to run a show like this,” says Kenny, who is also the voice of SpongeBob. “I’m sure Pen has felt like he’s losing his grip on reality because he’s the arbiter of everything. Sometimes it’s burdensome and you yearn for simpler times.”

But don’t worry, friends: Ward isn’t stepping down from the show entirely. He’ll remain on as one of the show’s storyboard artists and writers, and has plans for a possible Adventure Time movie or video game—though he’ll probably never chose to create another TV show again so he won’t have to handle the stress anymore. “Whatever the next thing is, I just want my brain to be happy doing it,” he said.

Read the rest of the fascinating profile over here at Rolling Stone.

(via Uproxx)

Previously in Adventure Time

• The New Adventure Time Title Card Art Book Is Totally Mathematical
• Marceline & Princess Bubblegum Totally Dated
• The Wide World of Adventure Time Mashups

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Since its inception, Sesame Street has taught its preschool audience lessons in phonics, arithmetic, and primitive computer animation. But the show has also smuggled a stealth history of television into its curriculum, through TV parodies like “Miami Mice” (which teaches the concept of adventure), “Mad Men” (all about emotions), and “Twin Beaks” (an introduction to the unspeakable mystery of the ethereal and the duality dictating the destiny of every living soul. Also: Puns). Recent TV history is the main thrust of the Entertainment Weekly-commissioned video below, in which a spoof of the Emmys enables rapid-fire send-ups in the category of “Best Monster in a Drama, Miniseries, a Mini-Drama, or Sherlock.” (Sick PBS-on-PBS burn, Sesame Street.) Cookie Monster’s innate obsessiveness makes him a good fit for True Detective’s Rust Cohle, but the video’s true stroke of genius is casting Elmo—who started life as an anonymous, unloved ...

Each of the pints I sifted through had about 20 little gobs of cookie dough, which were roughly the diameter of this penny that I may or may not have accidentally put in my mouth. But are they actually, you know, cookie dough? Or are they some sort of weird, cookie dough-flavored concoction?