Christopher.kantos

Decipher Culver City's parking puzzle, avoid a $73 fine! Photo: CBS Los Angeles. [via]

Three Australian designers have made a butter knife that works like a cheese grater. No more torn bread! The Stupendous Splendiferous Butterup has raised $186,212 on Kickstarter. Reserve one for US$16."

Zimbabwe's dictator Robert Mugabe unleashed a storm of brutal, genocidal violence after losing the 2008 elections -- and now we know that it was funded by western hedge-funds and banks, led by Och-Ziff Capital Management, the largest publicly traded fund, with assistance from Blackrock, GLG Partners, and Credit Suisse, who raised $100M for Mugabe's weapons and torture-chambers in exchange for a sweetheart deal on the country's platinum mines. Read the rest

Gimbb14, fishing off the coast of Florida near Bonita Springs, caught a black tip shark at least four feet long. As he tried to reel it in, however, a grouper emerges from the deep to claim his prize.

If there is such thing as a perfect motorcycle accident, this might be it: a motorcyclist crashes full speed into a car that's changing lanes. That's bad. The crash launches his body into a spinning mess in the air. That's definitely bad. But yet somehow he manages to flip and land standing up on the car's roof.

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Superb lyrebirds have the ability to mimic any sounds from their environment, including chainsaws, toy laser guns, camera shutters, jackhammers and also human voice. Sometimes, in summer, they sing for hours a day. Here are some of their most amazing songs.

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Here’s a fun game. Change your name on your Uber account. Then demand they say your name before you get in “for safety reasons”. #uber #slutbag #sanfran #notapenisforonce

I love this list at Superlinguo, and wish it were ten times longer.

Scorpion Dagger, aka James Kerr, makes these fantastic GIFs more or less every day. "They're digital collages made mostly from northern and early renaissance paintings," he says.

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 Hey, you! Don’t you wish you had more distractions in your day? Wouldn’t it be great if you could get distracted by something literally every time you opened a new browser tab? No? Oh. Well. Uh. Check this out anyway. Read More

There is nothing about this VHS instructional video, titled How to Have Cybersex on the Internet, that isn't completely amazing. Describing it would only sully its perfection, so just hit play and be awed. Warning: Contains a topless (but censored) lady. After all, who the hell cybersexes with their shirt on?

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A fantastic collection of photos taken at perfect moments, mostly culled from Reddit. Read the rest

"Men focus on a baseball player's torso more than women, who look only at the face."

Dear Business Insider,

That is not a torso.

Best regards,
Rob

Here's what happens when you add Morgan Freeman's narration for March of the Penguins to American Juggalo.

The football teams of Barbados and Grenada found themselves in a bizarre situation in a qualification round for the 1994 Carribean Cup. In order to advance to the finals, Barbados had to win this game by a margin of two goals; in any other outcome Grenada would qualify. Also, the tournament organizers had stated that if the teams reached a draw, extra time would be added to the match in which every goal would count double, the so-called “golden goal.”

Barbados was leading 2-0 when Grenada scored a goal in the final four minutes. With so little time remaining, the Barbados players conferred and, to everyone’s surprise, turned on their own goal, evening the score at 2-2. Their strategy was clear: If they could maintain this tie for the remaining few minutes, they’d be rewarded with an extra 30 minutes of playing time in which a single goal would give them the two-point margin they needed.

The Grenadians, realizing this, spent the last two minutes trying to get control of the ball and send it into their own goal — this would end the game at 3-2 and deny Barbados its two-goal margin.

The Barbadians, realizing this, began defending the Grenadian goal, effectively reversing the whole game. To add to the confusion, some Grenadians tried to make regular goals as well, which left Grenada attacking both goals, Barbados defending both, and most players and supporters utterly bewildered. The Barbadians eventually succeeded in holding the score at 2-2 — and made a winning goal in the extra time.

“I feel cheated,” complained Grenadian manager James Clarkson. “The person who came up with these rules must be a candidate for a madhouse. The game should never be played with so many players running around the field confused. Our players did not even know which direction to attack: our goal or their goal. I have never seen this happen before. In football, you are supposed to score against the opponents to win, not for them.” The Caribbean Cup retired the golden goal rule shortly thereafter.

(Thanks, Karl.)

The "kaffir" in "Kaffir lime" is actually a racial slur. At National Geographic, Maryn McKenna struggles with how to deal with foods that have offensive names.

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There is surely an explanation, but just watch this for one moment, unadulterated by context, and enjoy it. It's wonderful. The inexplicable behavior from the host and Ronaldo's 1,00 yard stare momentarily interrupted by a blink that says what the actual fuck? Amazing.

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The stars of Comedy Central's fake news hour are lending their support to the Star Wars: Force for Change initiative to benefit UNICEF by engaging in a hardcore battle to determine which of them is biggest fan. It's worth it to see Stewart be the one to take things too far, for a change.

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Look at how dumb this fucking goat is.

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chuck?

[video]

Sun Noodle makes the ramen noodles for a host of the top ramen shops in NYC, LA, and elsewhere (Ivan, Momofuku, etc.)...here's a look at how the noodles are made in their New Jersey factory:

See also how to make hand-pulled noodles and Sun Noodle's fresh ramen kits are available for retail (via devour)

Tags: food   ramen   video

"Just when I thought I've seen everything," writes Jerry Bradley. "That's a dead body on a stretcher that launched out of the back of a coroner's vehicle in Feasterville.’ The Bucks County Coroner’s Office says it deeply regrets this incident.

actionables:

exclusive gif from Brazil vs. Germany game

Police in Santa Cruz, CA have arrested Alix Tichelman, a 26-year-old sex worker from Atlanta, Georgia who they say injected heroin into a Google executive on his yacht, then destroyed evidence and ran from the scene when he OD'd. Read the rest

4gifs:

Mary Jane & Spider-man. [video]

The French publication L'Équipe created a Lego depiction of Germany's thrashing of Brazil and it's a pretty cool little thing that really hammers home the onslaught poor Júlio César was under. An added bonus is that, it turns out, a totally helpless stop-motion Lego man is very sad and very funny.

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Here's some good news for Twins fans who want to get drunk at baseball games but really hate having to engage with human beings when purchasing beer: Target Field has just installed a self-serve beer machine, the first to ever exist in a major-league stadium.

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The President stopped by Chipotle yesterday and sat down with folks to talk about helping more families succeed before his speech at the Working Families Summit.

This is an actual news story. In Fort Erie, Canada, a raccoon became trapped at the top of a hydro transformer pole with a mostly empty jar of peanut butter stuck on its head.

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