Install Raid for Free ✅ Mobile and PC: https://clik.cc/jAV9x and get a special starter pack 💥 Available only for the next 30 days 💥 Thanks to Raid for sponsoring today’s video!
Crew: Jon Jafari - Director/Editor/Writer Sergio Torres - Director of Photography/Line Producer/Creative Andrew Reynoso - Key Grip/Creative Lewis Bown - Editor/Creative Charlotte Jafari - Set Designer Tom Ryan - Shire Music
The Food and Drug Administration this week approved an injectable drug that helps prevent the spread of HIV. It only has to be taken once every eight weeks, compared to a daily oral pill.
If the National Weather Service forecast for the next 7 days for Bush Airport comes to fruition, it will be the second warmest 7-day period of weather during the winter months (December-February) on record for the city of Houston, exceeded only by a stretch in late February 1996. The forecast 74° average temperature over the next week would beat the previous December 24-30 record from 2016 by four full degrees. Basically, we’re heading into unprecedented territory for late December. The 5 day temperature anomaly forecast for the US and Canada is quite extreme. As warm as it is here is almost as cold as it’s going to be in, say, Calgary or Edmonton.
Parts of Texas through the Ohio Valley will average 20 to 25°F above normal over the next 5 days. Note: The above map is in °C. (Tropical Tidbits)
So, the forecast for Houston is pretty straightforward: Warm.
Today
You should be clear if you’re traveling anywhere today. Look for a mix of sun and clouds. It will be noticeably breezy today, with a steady south wind around 10 to 15 mph, a bit stronger over the water. Today’s record highs for Bush and Hobby are both 82°, set in different years (1955 and 1948 respectively). We’ll at least make an attempt to get there.
Christmas Day
I’m guessing Santa may tell his reindeer to come back to the Houston area when they wrap up their work on Christmas Eve, because tomorrow’s weather would warm the heart of anyone living at the North Pole. Look for more of the same: Sun, some clouds, a breeze, and temps warming from the 60s into the 80s. Santa can park himself somewhere on the Island and down a taco and margarita, or two.
Christmas Day will feel more like Halloween this year, as we approach the record of 83° in Houston. (Weather Bell)
The number to beat in Galveston is 76, and 83 is the record in Houston at both Hobby and Bush tomorrow. I think Galveston’s record will fall. Houston will be close, but given how this month has played out, I think we’ll have our warmest Christmas on record. We’ll see.
Sunday & Monday
See above. Maybe Santa can extend his stay. Hit up Kemah? The Texans are home this weekend. Maybe the roof will be open, though it might be too warm for that.
Rest of next week
So, let’s get serious for a second: When is the next cold front? Model support for one doesn’t real increase until next weekend as it stands right now. So for those of you who actually like colder season weather, I sincerely apologize. For those of you that love this, it’s your time to shine. Look for more 60s by night and 80s by day through Friday, possibly Saturday as well. Shower chances creep back in, but the models are quite unenthused about how much rain may occur through next Thursday or Friday.
Rainfall over the next week looks unimpressive. While shower chances will gradually enter the forecast, anything we see would probably be quite isolated. (Pivotal Weather)
Low clouds and fog should also return next week. But through Friday, I see nothing too noteworthy in terms of weather impacts outside of occasional fog and warm temperatures.
We’ll have more on Monday. Meanwhile, I’ll echo Eric’s sentiments from yesterday. I hope you have a wonderful, safe, and most importantly, healthy Christmas and holiday season. We are, as always, grateful and thankful for your support. Stay cool this weekend.
We've noted for years how much of the hysteria surrounding 5G health hazards aren't based on actual science. In fact, 5G in general is arguably less powerful that previous standards; especially millimeter wave 5G, which struggles with distance and wall penetration. Most 5G health freak outs you'll see online are often based on a twenty year old misinterpreted graph that doesn't actually say what folks claim it does. That's not to say it's impossible that cellular technology could be harming human health, just that the evidence we have so far absolutely does not point in that direction.
Of course facts and data aren't particularly popular in the post-truth era, leading to endless continued freak outs over 5G. Some of which have proven notably dangerous to wireless company technicians, who've been increasingly targeted by conspiracy theorists. They've also resulted in a sub-market of grifters, offering "solutions" to a problem that isn't real (see this faraday cage enclosed router, for example).
Some of these grifts have proven to be a bit more harmful to their target audience however. For example the Authority for Nuclear Safety and Radiation Protection (ANVS) in the Netherlands just had to issue a warning that several brands of “quantum pendants” and other “negative ion” jewelry marketed as "anti-5G" were in fact radioactive and dangerous to human health:
"The consumer products tested contain radioactive materials and therefore continuously emit ionizing radiation, thereby exposing the wearer. Exposure to ionizing radiation can cause adverse health effects. Due to the potential health risk they pose, these consumer products containing radioactive materials are therefore prohibited by law. Ionizing radiation can damage tissue, and DNA and can cause, for example, red skin. Only low levels of radiation have been measured on these specific products. However, someone who wears a product of this kind for a prolonged period (a year, 24 hours a day) could expose themselves to a level of radiation that exceeds the stringent limit for skin exposure that applies in the Netherlands. To avoid any risk, the ANVS calls on owners of such items not to wear them from now on."
You'd like to think that people who bought radioactive jewelry to ward off unproven health hazards only to find the jewelry itself was killing them would maybe learn something from the experience, but that's unfortunately not how any of this works. Group think reinforced gibberish belief systems take a lot of time and effort to unwind, if you hadn't noticed by the seeming parade of conspiracy theories that never die.
It's all been leading to this. The gang from "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" have dropped the penultimate and final episodes of their record-breaking fifteenth season, and they are some doozies.
"Always Sunny" season 15 has been all about interrogating the past and the gang's total inability to mature, and its final two episodes bring those themes to a head. In the first, "Dee Sinks in a Bog," Charlie's (Charlie Day) two dads fight for his love, while Dee (Kaitlin Olson) runs into an old foe from her past that makes things very tough on her. In the second, "The Gang Carries a Corpse Up a Mountain," the myriad conflicts of this season are resolved in typical "Sunny" manner: with lots of yelling. Both are full of reveals that make the rest of the season even funnier, making this one of their most complex seasons yet.
While callbacks to previous episodes and inside jokes are nothing new for the series, this is the first time an overarching plot has gone on for more than two episodes. The Ireland arc of "Sunny" is an incredible piece of television, so let's break down how things end on the Emerald Isle, and I'll recommend two more library episodes to help wash them down. Those recommendations will be a tiny bit different this week; since this two-parter is really one big story, I'll be recommending another two-parter to go with it. Buckle up, jabronis, it's finale time.
Spoilers ahead for season 15 of "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia."
The Gang Searches For Meaning
When we last saw the gang, they had split up a bit due to growing annoyed with one another on their Irish vacation. Mac (Rob McElhenney) has gone to try and join a seminary and become a Catholic priest, while Charlie has finally met his biological father, Shelley Kelly (Colm Meaney) and wants to get to know him better. Dee has a hot date with a doctor, which means Frank (Danny DeVito) and Dennis (Glenn Howerton) are left on their own in the dilapidated castle Dennis rented.
Frank enlists Dennis' help in trying to separate Charlie and Shelley, bringing them closer than they've ever been. Dennis even gives Frank a little kiss on his head, in one of the few genuine moments of affection ever shown between members of the gang. Dennis thanks Frank for making him the man he is ... though considering how sinister they both are, it's not really a good thing. It's kind of sweet, in a twisted way, given that all three of the people Frank thought were his children turned out to be someone else's.
Mac thinks that he's bonding with his new priesthood buddy when things take a dark turn. On "The Always Sunny Podcast," McElhenney revealed that they had to change the plot of an early episode ("Charlie Got Molested"), which featured a pedophile priest. They changed the priest to a teacher, but now, 15 years later, they've finally come back around to the concept. Mac thinks that Brother Gus (Mark Prendergast) is another gay man, but instead discovers he's actually a pedophile. Mac is shaken, his last shot at identity tainted. Meanwhile, Dee gets stuck in a bog while looking for peat moss to burn in the castle to cover up the smells from Dennis' illness last episode. The Waitress (Mary Elizabeth Ellis) happens by and only agrees to help her if Dee can say her name. Of course, Dee cannot, and only eventually guesses the name while throwing out random ones. The Waitress ends up getting stuck in the bog instead, and Dee leaves her to her fate.
Frank and Dennis come up with an elaborate plan to host a "banquet of humiliation" for Charlie and Shelley, but Frank messes it up by putting poop in Shelley's soup. Charlie calls his bluff and forces Frank to eat one of the "special meatballs" himself. When he can't, Charlie tells them that he's staying in Ireland to make cheese with his dad, and they leave the castle. Dee, covered in mud, stops them, and Shelley believes that she is the banshee who appears before all Kelly men before they die. Things are looking grim for the gang, who have never been driven quite this far apart.
The Gang Almost Breaks Up
After the horrific events of the previous evening, it seems like the gang might split up for good. Charlie invites them all on a "hike" with his dad, and miraculously, they all show up. Frank has even brought extra supplies to try to prove his worth to Charlie, though it should be noted he has a contingency bottle of urine in case things turn sideways. Plans change quickly, however, when Charlie reveals that Shelley Kelly is dead, and he's enlisted the gang to help carry his dad up the mountain to fulfill a Kelly family funerary tradition.
On the way up the mountain, some brutal truths about the trip are revealed: Dennis probably killed Dee's date when he showed up and Dee was stuck in the bog, Mac actually is Irish and the gang paid his mom to lie to him about it, and Frank caught mild COVID from Dennis and gave it to Shelley, who died gasping for air. Furious with one another, members of the gang peel off one by one and head back to Patty's Pub to wait for their flight back to Philly. In the end it's only Charlie and Frank, and Charlie tells Frank to leave him alone.
Back at Patty's, the gang tell one another how they're going to never speak again when the Waitress, having escaped from the bog, shushes them. With a mutual enemy, the gang unleash on her, screaming about their right as Americans to be as loud as they want. "You are not in America!" the Waitress yells back, and Frank has the perfect response: "We are America, sweetheart! And we carry our country wherever we go! Because we love her, and when you love someone, you can't bear to leave 'em behind, not ever!" This rouses the gang into going back for Charlie, tearing over the beautiful Irish hillside in a huge American pickup truck.
What happens next is one of the most emotionally wrenching scenes in the series' history. Charlie, dragging the corpse of his dead deadbeat dad in the rain, breaks down and begins to sob. "You were supposed to carry me," he cries as he collapses in the mud, overwhelmed by grief. He grieves the father he never really had, he grieves the little boy he once was, and he grieves what could have been. Day's performance is heartbreaking. Charlie has always been the heart and soul of the gang, the one member who somehow keeps them all from being completely awful. His anguish is palpable, and he really doesn't deserve to be abandoned. Thankfully, he hasn't been, and Frank and the rest of the gang arrive to help him finish what they started. Though they aren't very good at being friends, or even decent human beings, the gang love and need one another. They deserve each other, and the finale's ending is a stellar reminder of that.
Chaser: The Gang Goes To Hell
"It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" also closed out its eleventh season with a two-parter: "The Gang Goes to Hell" parts 1 and 2. In "The Gang Goes to Hell," Mac signs the gang up for a Caribbean cruise to try and get them to shake their bad habits by getting out of Philly. Instead, the trip makes their bad habits even worse. Dennis, who attempts to curb his lust, terrifies a young woman with his advances. Dee, unsuccessful at tempering her rage, punches a magician in the face. Mac is searching for his faith and instead complicates it by finally recognizing that he's a gay man. And Charlie and Frank? Well, they promise to try to be less weird and then end up drinking boat fuel.
The brilliance of "The Gang Goes to Hell" comes near the end of its second episode, when it looks like the gang are going to drown. The ship is sinking and they're all trapped in the brig together because of their bad behavior. At first, they're furious with one another, but soon realize that at least they get to die together. They all hold hands and sink to the bottom, strangely at peace for the first time possibly ever. Then the hatch opens, and they fight one another to escape. The moment is gone, and they're back to being just as horrible as they always were. Frank, Mac, Charlie, Dee, and Dennis will always bicker amongst themselves, but they'll also always stand united against a common foe: even one as inevitable as death.
Much like this week's two episodes, "The Gang Goes to Hell" shows that the gang cannot change, and that instead they force the world around them to change instead. You can take "It's Always Sunny" out of Philadelphia, but they'll bring Philly with them wherever they go.
The Gang Together, Strong
The gang's interconnected nature, whether you want to call it love or co-dependence, has turned into the main focus of this season. Season 14 ended with "Waiting for Big Mo," a riff on the Samuel Beckett play "Waiting for Godot," leaving many fans wondering if the gang behind the gang was still interested in continuing the series. The season ended with the characters questioning whether laser tag was fun anymore, and it was a brilliant allegory for the journey the series and its creators had made.
With "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" season 15, they're letting the viewers know that they'll be around for as long as it's fun to work together, which might be forever. After all, McElhenney, Day, and Howerton don't just write "Sunny" together; they also host a weekly podcast about the series, and McElhenney and Day co-write the Apple+ series "Mythic Quest" with fellow "Sunny" writer Megan Ganz, who also produces the podcast. This crew clearly loves spending time with one another as much as the gang, though according to the podcast, there is plenty of bickering, too.
There are many sitcoms about terrible people behaving badly, from "Seinfeld" and "Friends" to more subversive fare like "Workaholics," but what's helped "It's Always Sunny" stay relevant and hilarious for 15 seasons is the love that goes into making the show. They care about these characters as if they were real people, and give their plots far more consideration than most viewers will ever notice. By giving these characters pathos, the creators made us care as much as they do. FXX has greenlit the series through season 18, and I look forward to watching the gang fight the world (and each other) for many years to come.
We are in the final countdown to Christmas, so if you still need some ideas for a gift, ALB has you covered! Check out some of our lovely ideas to really give your gifts the personal touch.
Look at all the magical decorations you can make with just a tin can.
First of all, the information and feedback from all of the comments was overwhelmingly helpful. Hearing the different thoughts and experiences from both sides helped to put things in perspective and plot a course forward.
I took all of the advice to heart and decided to wait to see how the pandemic developed; I also thought about how – as some readers pointed out – I could probably find another job very quickly given that my market and skill set are in high demand, verify and weigh benefits, and to look long-term at my prospects should I remain a government employee. For the time being after writing in, I decided to stay put and see how things went, then possibly make a move later.
This past summer there was an inciting incident at my federal job where all of the credit for the work I had done was put under the name of my male colleague – but I was to continue doing all of the work. When I asked why, I was told, “[Name] has a PHD and we need to give him something to do.” This incident, combined with our leadership forcing everyone to return to the office mid-pandemic even though it wasn’t needed for most jobs, forced me to really sit down and evaluate where my federal career could go and what I wanted for myself.
I had largely charted my own course in the government since I’m in a relatively new field, and I realized I had already reached the peak of where I could go as a federal employee given the current restrictions imposed by OPM. I decided that I wouldn’t be satisfied sitting in the same position for another 30+ years until I became eligible for retirement – I expected and wanted more from myself.
I also heavily considered the pandemic position and my industry – fortunately, I am in one of the industries that has boomed during the pandemic and is growing at an insane pace, so I felt relatively assured in the job security if I were to make a move. I thought as well about a quote from “Not So NewReader”: “I often think of the story of the old man in the nursing home. When interviewed about his life he said, ‘I should have taken more chances. The things I thought were big risks really weren’t that big.'”
I updated my resume and LinkedIn profile with the advice you provided on your website, then applied for several positions. I ended up with competing offers; salary negotiations were very confusing for me as a civilian, since the pay scale is so different from private industry. When initially asked by recruiters about salary expectations, I used your advice from this article and this article – specifically stating, when asked about prior salary, “My duties grew to include x and y, and my salary reflects that.” I also asked for the top of the range I was hoping for and then remained silent – much easier said than done.
I know that the standard recommendation is not to come back with a request for a higher salary than originally requested, but after the fifth interview at one of the companies, where the hiring manager let slip some critical information about the role and my qualifications, I realized that I had originally asked for a number that had very much so low-balled myself. At the next discussion with the recruiter, I let them know that based on the last conversation with the hiring manager, I had realized that given the responsibilities and expectations for the position, I would be more comfortable asking for a higher range and mentioned – truthfully – that I had a competing offer.
The company promptly issued an offer that was a 190% raise – almost 3 times my pay – in addition to a sign on bonus AND a hefty stock offering! In addition to that, the benefits were even better than those I had as a federal employee, which by itself was incredible. Upon hearing the final offer, which was more than I had expected, and calmly letting them know I would accept, I ended the call and cried for a while at the table in my kitchen. I had no idea that the work I was doing was valued so highly.
I handed in my resignation, started my new position, and have no regrets. The amount of stress from my job has been cut by 80%, the benefits are far, far better, and the lives of my husband and I have completely changed. I’m no longer stressed about money, since we’re no longer living paycheck to paycheck, and I am unbelievably happy and excited to start work every day with a company that values equality and me enough to pay me what I have realized I’m worth. It has progressed to the point that my husband complained that I “gush about my new job too much” (he’s very jealous.) Much like the old man in the nursing home, this risk wasn’t as big as I thought it was, and it’s changed my life.
Thank you so much for the resources you provided through this website and for the readers that gave me such wonderful advice!
Was invited to my boss’s house for an employee holiday party. This small business was owned by a married couple who were also landlords, so they were pretty wealthy and had a huge house. I was walking around admiring their art when I came across a statue.
A nude statue.
A nude statue of my boss.
2. The dance
Our CEO loved hosting the annual Christmas party as he felt it was his personal thank you to all of the employees. He would spend weeks planning out the decorations, tasting food for catering, hand selecting the gifts, and always made sure there was a huge open bar with premium drinks for everyone to enjoy. The party started at 7pm, ended at 12 am, and then he would do an extended “after hours” party until 2am. Needless to say, people wound up pretty wasted at these parties and the CEO was the most wasted every year. Luckily, he was a happy go lucky type of drunk who usually just ended up thanking everyone profusely for their work.
One year the dance floor was pumping and everyone was having a grand old time when the DJ decided to play “(I’ve Had) The Time of My Life” (you know, the song from Dirty Dancing). Suddenly the dance floor parted. The CEO stood at one end of the dance floor, zoned into the music. The VP of Sales locked eyes with the CEO and they began to fully run toward each other, each clearly assuming the other would catch him. They leapt into the air with drunken grace and enthusiasm. ::smack:: They landed on the concrete with a smack you could hear over the music and crowd. All we could see was some blood and two bodies trying to untangle.
They had both cracked their heads on the ground and gotten concussions. Neither gentleman wanted an ambulance called so someone’s sober wife packed them into her SUV (each of them with a roadie in-hand) and drove them off to the ER.
The next day we got an email from the CEO with the subject, “Each Year Gets More Epic” and a picture of him and the VP of Sales posing together at the ER with stitches on the side of their heads.
3. Not a pickle
One year, I was The Pickle Lady. I was obsessed with pickling, especially lacto-fermented pickles. I pickled anything I could get my hands on and, since my pickling was so prolific, I often shared the fruits of my labours with people in the office. I also talked a lot about pickling and would happily offer guidance to anyone seeking the way of the pickle. This also expanded into talking about making vinegars and kombuchas, and I freely offered bits of my SCOBYs to anyone who would ask. I often joked that I was the Queen of Controlled Rotting. In retrospect, I was probably a little obnoxious, but it was all in good fun.
One sweet, lovely coworker watched all of this happen without engaging with me about it much, so she must have misunderstood how fermentation works. She picked me for Secret Santa that year and when the office got together to open gifts, I ended up opening mine near last. It was this beautiful gift bag, just to my taste, and I pulled out my gift to find… A jar of mold. Just grey-green fuzziness throughout the entire jar. I was deeply confused and not originally sure what it was, so I tentatively opened the jar. The smell was eye-watering to say the least, and it quickly spread to those around me. They reacted with a mix of polite confusion, low-key revulsion, and concealed amusement. After a few jokes and confused noises, we all made nice, set the jar of life aside, and moved on with the party.
Later the coworker came to me, red in the face and with tears in her eyes, asking why everyone had hated her gift. I asked her to clarify what it was supposed to be. She said she knew that I loved all this “controlled rotting” business, so she had put some of her favourite foods in a jar and let them go bad in the hopes that I could use the mold to make my own treats. That way it would be like we were making them together. It was so adorable, so endearing, so loving, and so misguided. I thanked her for her intentions and we were eventually able to laugh about the misunderstanding.
Now I love to tell the story of the time I was gifted a jar of mold.
4. The sink
Years ago my office holiday party was held in one of the company buildings, which had a single person restroom. Everyone had a good time and the drinks were aplenty, but no shenanigans (or so we thought). The next day, one of employees sent out a photo he took at the end of the night of the bathroom sink completely torn off the wall and smashed on the ground. Nobody fessed up, but at the time I had access to the security footage so the IT guy and I checked it out. We saw our HR manager go into the (remember, single person) bathroom with their partner and then both snuck out several minutes later. The next person to go in was the one who sent out the photo. I don’t know what was going on in there, but hopefully it was worth it!
5. The questionnaire
When my office decided on a Secret Santa gift exchange, we all filled out short questionnaires (clearly labeled as being for the Secret Santa) that gave us an opportunity to describe things we like and don’t like. I drew my coworker’s name and was curious to know what she’d put about her likes/dislikes. This coworker, despite being very good at her job in many respect, was known around the office as someone who occasionally needed to be reminded to slow down and listen to or read the entirety of what someone was saying before speaking/acting. So I should not have been surprised to see that she’d listed her likes as “walks on the beach” and “sunsets,” or (my personal favorite) “making love.”
6. The finger
One year the office holiday part coincided with a visit from the company’s CEO (we were a satellite office), so the party planning committee had the brilliant idea to bring our ~40 person group to the bar on the top level of the Hancock Building in Chicago. Nice and fancy in theory, but the drinks there are so expensive that we were only budgeted for one each, and it’s really not a very big bar so it was very awkward fitting us all together. Things got worse when the CEO decided to make everybody go around and share what they hoped to see for the future of the company (so festive!). Suffice it to say the vibe was already very weird by the time we were ready to leave. I ended up taking the elevator down 95 floors in the same group as the CEO, who had been chatting with one of my office’s sales reps, and for some reason he pointed his finger at her while talking and, to the horror of the rest of us crammed in with them like sardines, she leaned forward and took his whole finger into her mouth. I have no idea why (not alcohol; we’d all just had the one weak cocktail apiece) but the stunned silence and awkward glances lasted for the rest of the ride.
7. The terrible cards
The worst corporate Christmas cards I’ve ever come across:
– Every year the CEO wrote everyone (100-ish people) a card with a quick message. This is a sweet idea.
– One year, the Design Director said she would design the cards. Also a fairly sweet idea.
– What she came up with was the weirdest card I’ve ever seen. No concession to Christmassy themes whatsoever. Dingy grey background with a checkbox list of the company values, so the CEO could tick whichever value he felt you most embodied. Sort of sweetly-intentioned (?) but deeply weird.
– So she gets the cards printed and drives over to the CEO’s house with them. They crack open a bottle of wine. They work through the cards. Tick, message, sign, tick, message, sign. There are worse ways to spend an evening, I guess.
– Except. For at least two people, he FAILED TO TICK ANY OF THE BOXES. So those two (at least) employees get a dingy grey card implying that the CEO does not think they embody any of the company values. NOT GOOD.
– A few days later, the Design Director sends out a very sheepish apology email.
8. The pet pictures
Job before last, my very shy, reserved coworker had a biiiiiiiiit too much to drink and went around the room demanding that people show her pictures of their pets. (This included the CEO, but fortunately he thought it was hilarious.) It culminated with Drunk Coworker bursting into tears when she was told one of our other coworkers didn’t have any pets, and saying, “You’re so nice, you deserve to have a dog.”
(She was mortified when we came back to work, so we didn’t tease her about it… much.)
9. The lap dance
My significant other’s holiday party is NIIICE. Lots of good food, like excessive amounts and lavish displays of every appetizer, main dish, etc. you can think of. The same with the alcohol and open bar, there literally isn’t a bottom shelf option. No Bud Light. No cheap vodka. No Two Buck Chuck wine to be had. The dress code is relaxed and ranges from tailored suits to guys in Carhart hoodies. It’s a work party that we actually look forward to because it’s so laid back and we really do have a good time. The last one was in 2019, and it may be the last one period. Or at least the last one where drinking isn’t monitored.
At the last party, an employee’s guest decided to give his girlfriend a lap dance. In full view of, well, everyone. People around the couple were half-heartedly trying to get him to stop, but they increased to frantic levels of “OMG STOP!” once he took his shirt off and could tell he was fully committed. Eventually someone got him to stop by tackling him to the ground with his pants around his ankles and his belt still in his hand, waving it around like a lasso.
10. The very bad writer
I was working for a vacation real estate company and we had a pretty big problem with the admin who did the newsletter/marketing/emails. She would NOT let anyone proofread her work or even allow anyone to correct anything and she had ZERO understanding of synonyms and misused words all the time and misused things like LOL and LMFAO, and also created her own bizarre shorthand to such an awful extent that it caused confusion, hilarity, and in some cases, offense and loss of business. Long story about the layout of the company, but we also had some rental units on-site for prospective buyers and a small spa, cafe, and bar. You know, vacation town stuff. She also did the menus and all the holiday announcements. This one was, and will always be, my favorite. It went out to over 15k former and current buyers and clients, inviting them to the company holiday party:
Cum celebrate our Holiday Szn with Secrete Santa! Fist four clients up and get a free giraffe of wine at their table!
What she was TRYING to say was that during our Secret Santa dinner and raffle, the first four clients who entered would get either a complimentary wine to take home or a carafe of wine at their table. Some other gems on the menu included “gooze breasts” “Bef stek” “Coozeberry Jam” and my absolute favorite “fresh tilabia.”
Some people thought she did this on purpose, I know for a fact she was just an absolute idiot.
11. The murder mystery lunch
My department went to a local, beloved restaurant as part of our holiday outing. We were going to go to their Holiday Murder Mystery lunch where, we assumed, we’d eat lunch while the play was going on. I personally thought there might be a little audience participation required but nothing like what we encountered.
Firstly, when booking the lunch, we were sent a picture of the room we’d be in. It was spacious and well-lit and beautifully decorated! When we got to the restaurant we were escorted into the basement where there were no windows, dim lighting, and a dingy bar. As we sat there, the actors came out dressed as elves, reindeer, and Mr. and Mrs. Claus. The costumes looked like they were picked up at the Halloween Store discount sale and smelled like they hadn’t been washed in years (yes, I could actually smell them). They moved from table to table, “in character” and even sat down with us many times… where they stayed for several minutes. Now, I can appreciate the work and skill it takes to improv but after about 10 minutes all I wanted to do was drink my Diet Coke and wait for the actual performance to start – not be forced to talk about Santa’s dismissal of labor laws with a guy in tights. After about 15 minutes of this I realized, with great horror, that this WAS the performance. These actors were going to improvise a play about a murder in Santa’s Workshop for the next 2 hours.
It. Was. Dreadful. I have never been so uncomfortable in such a “festive” setting. The most surreal part was when they would make dirty jokes and break into song. A guy dressed in a muscle suit with reindeer antlers on his head gyrated behind me as I stared intensely at the table. If there was a crack in the floor, I would’ve slid into it.
What made it worse was the fact that the poor waitress (who apparently been pulled aside at the last minute and told she was going to be waiting on 30 people by herself), was struggling to take orders that we had already placed when we booked the event. We got there at 12pm and by 2pm, we still hadn’t been served. Not only that, but no one had been murdered yet!
When we finally got our food, I realized that things were not going to get any better. The food looked like it could get up and walk away and the dessert was, what I assumed to be, canned apple pie filling with Redi-Whip on top.
We got a break from the show while we ate (or chose not to), at which point we were forced to tell the actors that we had to be back on the bus by 3pm and someone had better get murdered soon. They picked up the improv pace and the workshop inspector faced death-by-wrapping-paper. We were given pieces of paper to write down who we thought did it and turned them in. The motive behind the murder was of a sexual nature, which I thought was a bit inappropriate for an office outing, and we were able to get out of there in time to get back to our bus.
We complained to management but were met with not much more than a shrug. If the food was at least decent, I could’ve brushed off that cringe-worthy “murder mystery” but, alas, there was really nothing redeeming about this outing. Except maybe the waitress, who has my condolences.
12. Phillippe
One place I worked had a fruitcake of undetermined origin which had been passed around for at least 10 years (longest tenured employee remembered it at her first holiday party, but it had been there prior to her). It had a name (Phillippe). Whoever won it built a shrine to Phillippe in their cube and proudly displayed it until the next year… Might have been a cheap gag gift, but dang the competition for Phillippe was intense.
The end of Phillippe’s story: An intern won it one year after I left and hadn’t realized that this wasn’t supposed to be eaten. Apparently Claxon Fruit Cake is still edible after at least 13 years. She brought Phillippe II for the next gift swap … All interns are now warned not to eat Phillippe II.
13. The perfume
My father’s story from a good 25 years ago. One time he’s telling us about what gifts they bought for all the staff. It was perfume (don’t get me started on the gendered nature of it, that’s a whole other thing) but one he didn’t recognize, and the salesperson from somewhere like Macy’s had “recommended” to him. He’s telling us this, and says it’s called something like “plah-sen-tay” like it’s French, he thinks (shades of A Christmas Story here). My mother and i start snickering. Really dad? She recommended it? And you said sure, sounds good? And he’s saying what, what? as we started laughing so hard we were crying and falling out of our seats at Boston Market… because he apparently had no idea he’d bought every woman on his staff PLACENTA perfume. Like something that had that in it, and it was maybe supposed to be a beauty aid? It was unclear, but we surmised that the salesperson had a truckload of this stuff to unload and could tell he had no idea what he was doing. He sits there horrified, and reflects, “Huh… i was wondering why people seemed a little weird about it. There was a lot of talking in hushed groups afterward.”
14. The buffalo
I’d been working in an office that would do the yankee swap/dirty santa style of gift exchange, where folks could steal a gift from each other. One year someone had found a photograph of a couple of water buffalo in their office. It was a BIG photo, framed, close to three feet wide. The water buffalo were pretty scroungy and dirty looking. It was not an attractive photo! But wrapped up, it looked like an impressive gift. As someone found out the hard way when they “won” it.
I thought it was pretty funny in its awfulness. So the next year I deliberately took it, and hung it with pride in my office.
The next year I hid the photo behind a couch in the party room, and then added my “gift” to the swap: A small, wrapped box, that held a note, “You won the buffalo photo.” I can’t remember who won it, but they were not amused.
I went back to visit, years later. There were the buffalo, hanging over a colleague’s desk. Everyone who had gotten it since had signed and dated the back.
15. The apology
Quite a few years ago, my husband and I attended a Christmas party at a local hotel, put on by the construction company he worked for. It was the first year we’d attended and because of past instances of drunk driving, the company had not only paid for the catered meal but also reserved rooms for all the attendees.
Among the highlights of the evening were the multiple escorts who were hired to attend with guests. One of them ended up sitting at our table. Her ‘date’ had hired her because he had recently broken up with the boss’s daughter and didn’t want to be seen attending alone. He proceeded to get drop-dead drunk on the table wine, and boozily monologue about his romantic difficulties. Full credit to the escort, she was among the best company at our table and when she wasn’t babysitting her maudlin charge, was a lovely conversationalist.
But it wasn’t until after dinner had concluded that the wheels *really* fell off the bus. To this day, I don’t know exactly what some of the attendees *did* in the indoor swimming pool that necessitated it being drained, but my husband says the clean-up charges were in the thousands. Being confirmed non-partiers, Mr. Jam and I were eager to avoid the impending trainwreck and when we were invited back to his co-worker’s suite to join three or four other of the more down to earth employees, we were anticipating fun, low-key evening playing cards or shooting the breeze.
We get to “Mike’s” room and settle down on the sofa. While we’re chatting, Mike suddenly grabs this duffle bag and starts rummaging around in it. I assume he’s eager to get out of the monkey suit but that’s not what was packed in his luggage. Instead, he starts organizing these thick baggies on the coffee table in front of us. Folks are making themselves at home, and he’s pouring what must have been hundreds, if not thousands, of dollars of hard drugs onto the table six inches from my knees. He’s chopping and chatting and telling jokes and all the while, he’s making little white lines, like he’s playing in Pablo Escobar’s sandtable!
I have no idea what to say and just want out of this awkward encounter. Mr. Jam and I have a frantic, yet totally silent, marital conversation, consisting entirely of raised eyebrows and shoulder shrugs, the result being my developing, quite out of the blue, a sudden and blinding headache from the half glass of red wine I’d had earlier at supper. Alerted to my suffering, Mike generously offers me a thick joint, promising that it will fix whatever ails me, but I decline very politely and retreat with all haste back to own, blissfully drug-free hotel room.
After I leave, Mike apparently realizes just what he’s done to make me so uncomfortable and he begins apologizing profusely to my husband on my behalf. You see, while he’d been cutting the hundreds of dollars of cocaine right in front of us, he’d also been telling a mildly off-colour joke, the punch line of which included a word that rhymes with truck. Clearly, my delicate ears couldn’t bear to hear such salty language. Mike’s apology went on and on as he promised my husband with absolutely sincerity that in future, he would remember to watch his language more carefully whenever he was around me. Mr. Jam assured him that I wouldn’t hold the joke against him, I was just especially sensitive to bold reds, but Mike remained doubtful.
And then there is this party coda. A few years later, after my husband had been gone from the company a couple of years, we chanced to run into ‘Mike’ in the parking lot of a big box store. In between inquiring about our kids and Mr. Jam’s new job, he once again took the time to apologize to me for the joke he’d told all those years earlier. Neither of us mentioned the drugs!
Enlarge / Illustration of antibodies (red and blue) responding to an infection with Covid-19 (purple). (credit: Getty Images)
A lower share of people infected with the Omicron coronavirus variant are likely to require hospital treatment compared with cases of the Delta strain, according to healthcare data from South Africa, Denmark, and the UK.
The findings by separate research teams raise hopes that there will be fewer cases of severe disease than those caused by other strains of the virus, but the researchers cautioned that Omicron’s high degree of infectiousness could still strain health services.
The reduction in severe illness was likely to stem from Omicron’s greater propensity, compared with other variants, to infect people who have been vaccinated or previously infected, experts stressed, though the UK studies also hinted at a possible drop in intrinsic severity.
Slashdot readers fahrbot-bot and Tangential share a report from Defense One: Within weeks, scientists at the Walter Reed Army Institute of Research expect to announce that they have developed a vaccine that is effective against COVID-19 and all its variants, even Omicron, as well as previous SARS-origin viruses that have killed millions of people worldwide. Walter Reed's Spike Ferritin Nanoparticle COVID-19 vaccine, or SpFN, completed animal trials earlier this year with positive results. Phase 1 of human trials, which tested the vaccine against Omicron and the other variants, wrapped up this month, again with positive results that are undergoing final review, Dr. Kayvon Modjarrad, director of Walter Reed's infectious diseases branch, said in an exclusive interview with Defense One. The new vaccine will still need to undergo phase 2 and phase 3 trials.
Unlike existing vaccines, Walter Reed's SpFN uses a soccer ball-shaped protein with 24 faces for its vaccine, which allows scientists to attach the spikes of multiple coronavirus strains on different faces of the protein. The vaccine's human trials took longer than expected, he said, because the lab needed to test the vaccine on subjects who had neither been vaccinated nor previously infected with COVID. The next step is seeing how the new pan-coronavirus vaccine interacts with people who were previously vaccinated or previously sick. The next step is seeing how the new pan-coronavirus vaccine interacts with people who were previously vaccinated or previously sick. Walter Reed is working with a yet-to-be-named industry partner for that wider rollout.
Some time ago, I noted that all Windows drivers are dated June 21, 2006. This is a date hack so that the Windows-provided driver is always treated as the driver of last resort, taking a back seat to any manufacturer-provided drivers, which will have a more recent date.
Note: Intel(R) Chipset Device Software uses an unusual date for the devices it is targeting. The date 07/18/1968 is symbolic – Intel was founded that day. The reason this date is used is to lower the rank of Intel(R) Chipset Device Software.
This is necessary because it’s a supporting utility that should not overwrite any other drivers. Updating Intel(R) Chipset Device Software is not needed – do not worry if you don’t have the latest version.
Grindr has been fined £5.5 million for selling user data to advertisers.
The location-based dating app – which is aimed at gay men – received the fine from the Norwegian Data Protection Authority, who claimed that sharing data without consent broke GDPR rules.
Tobias Judin, head of the international department at the NDPA said in a statement: “Our conclusion is that Grindr has disclosed user data to third parties for behavioural advertisement without a legal basis. The Grind (sic) app is used to connect with other users in the LGBTQ+ community, and we are aware that many users choose not to use their full name or upload a picture of their face in order to be discrete. Nonetheless, their personal data and the fact that they were on Grindr was disclosed to an unknown number of third parties for marketing purposes, without giving the users accessible information or a genuine choice.”
The Authority went on to claim that “thousands” of Grindr users have now had their data shared “unlawfully”, and explained that the gravitas of the situation justified the size of the fine.
Judin added: “Thousands of users in Norway have had their personal data shared unlawfully for the commercial interests of Grindr, including GPS location and the fact that the users in question were on Grindr. Business models based on behavioural advertisement are common in the digital economy, and it is imperative that administrative fines for GDPR violations are dissuasive in order to foster compliance with the law.”
Each December 25, two billion people celebrate the anniversary of my most successful act of personal branding: the birth of my son, Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior. Even if you’re not delivering the Messiah, a compelling birth story could launch your little lamb (of God or otherwise) into an exciting career as the leader of a major world religion or, at the very least, make other moms feel jealous and inadequate. Here’s a peek behind the stable door to see how I did it:
1. Create a Visually Pleasing Niche Aesthetic
I’d seen hospital, bathtub, and taxi-on-the-way-to-the-hospital-or-bathtub birth events, but no one was literalizing rural haute by birthing in an actual barn. My whole “no room at the inn” gambit developed a suspenseful narrative and synergized organically with my rustic-chic aesthetic.
I wanted my sexy blue robes to really pop, so I ordered a star from the Royal Beauty Bright Collection to be placed directly above the stable. It became a navigational beacon to all worshippers of my son and a future holiday symbol for millennia. Just sayin’, don’t overlook the little details or the cosmic details.
And if you want to look #blessed in your photos? Get the epidural. In every nativity scene, you’ll see me beaming angelically at everyone. Know how I got that reputation for being “Mary, full of grace”? “Grace” is obscure Nazarene slang for narcotics.
Remember, your ultimate goal is that your labor and delivery become so iconic that people will re-create it on their front lawns annually.
2. Monetize with Sponsorships and Embedded Marketing
My DIY backdoor to a financially secure start for my god-mom brand was to hype my baby’s birth as the fulfillment of an ancient prophecy, then register for baby gifts that only literal kings could afford. The frankincense and myrrh were luxuries, but then, in a stroke of genius, I threw in a third request for solid gold. Might sound cynical, but until Caesar Augustus passes single-payer comprehensive universal healthcare, this madonna’s a material girl.
In place of a bassinet, I commissioned a bespoke manger, in keeping with my birth story’s pastoral glam aesthetic. My carpenter husband simultaneously rolled out his line of artisanal baby mangers in franchised stalls across Galilee’s open-air markets.
Of course, you may prefer more traditional gifts and birthing products for your little bundle of Joy to the World, but I’m not a cookie-cutter kinda girl—which is ironic since cookies became such a big tradition on Mary’s Perfect Birth Plan Anniversary.
3. Include Some Unexpected Quirks to Make Your Brand Identity Distinctive
Since I was chosen from among all women to bear an incarnate god, I centered my brand identity on the concept “All-Holy Ever-Virgin, Our Lady of the Immaculate Heart.” I know it’s a little over-the-top, but there are a lot of virgins out there and I really wanted to stand out in the marketplace as an extra-pure supervirgin.
Once I, the self-described handmaid of the Lord, was recorded telling the angel Gabriel I would categorically submit to God’s will, the nativity appeared spontaneous and authentic. No one imagined a bad bitch Queen of Heaven was behind every last photo-ready detail.
Except one detail: it was Joseph who requested a percussionist be present for the labor and delivery. I wasn’t keen on the idea. But honestly, Joseph had already accepted that it was not him but, um, the Holy Spirit who had impregnated me. So I wasn’t in a position to say no to his only suggestion. Plus, I’d already hired some hot shepherds as eye-candy background talent, so I had no grounds to claim I wanted privacy. In the end, the little drummer boy became one of those quirky little details that distinguished my brand from all the other virgin births.
4. Enjoy Yourself!
Sure, my baby went on to become the King of Kings, the Prince of Peace, and the Redeemer of all humankind. And yes, celebrating the flawless execution of my elaborate birth plan has turned into the most important religious, cultural, and economic holiday for millions upon millions of people across the world. But I’m sure whatever birth story you tell will be absolutely fine for a non-saint and her non-divine baby. Just have fun with it!
Some time ago, I noted that all Windows drivers are dated June 21, 2006. This is a date hack so that the Windows-provided driver is always treated as the driver of last resort, taking a back seat to any manufacturer-provided drivers, which will have a more recent date.
Note: Intel(R) Chipset Device Software uses an unusual date for the devices it is targeting. The date 07/18/1968 is symbolic – Intel was founded that day. The reason this date is used is to lower the rank of Intel(R) Chipset Device Software.
This is necessary because it’s a supporting utility that should not overwrite any other drivers. Updating Intel(R) Chipset Device Software is not needed – do not worry if you don’t have the latest version.
Just a quick detour to show how Hyperbolica's dialog system works. With nearly 1000 NPCs, a custom dialog system and language was developed to simplify the process.
76 Ways to Get Organized for Christmas
McCullough and Cooper
1982
This book is my kind of nightmare. These women probably start planning Christmas on December 26. Obviously, from the introduction, you can already tell they have wayyy too much spirit. All that is missing is a Gantt chart and a Powerpoint. Since this book was published prior to many of those project management tools, I guess we can let it go. That alone makes this book a weeder.
I do have a snarky attitude both at work and at home. (Many years ago, I wrote this piece on “forced fun” for the holidays. Much of it is still true.) I blame it on the day we had repatriated from the UK right before the holidays, and someone commented that we should rush and get our house decorations going, since it was already past Thanksgiving. We had just moved in. I still had jet lag. The last thing I wanted to do was put up Christmas lights.
However, if you are the kind of person who wants to turn Christmas up to 11, this book was for you…in 1982. There are lots of holiday ideas in crafts, cooking, and entertaining. Heck, we can even throw in a computer book so you can be up on the tech.
Good morning my friends. After a chilly start to today, much warmer weather lies ahead for Houston, with sunshine and 80-degree days through the weekend. In fact, it should remain abnormally warm through the end of 2021. But what about the New Year? You may be starting to see rumors on social media about a snowstorm in Houston about two weeks from now. We’re, uhh, not sold.
There is a nice chilly airmass over the region this morning, but it’s about to be swept away. (Weather Bell)
Wednesday
Today will be simply lovely. With mostly sunny skies, high temperatures will rise to about 70 degrees this afternoon. With modest dewpoints, the air will feel exceptionally pleasant. Winds will be light, out of the southeast at 5 to 10 mph. Really, today will just be super nice for anything you care to do outside. Please enjoy if you can. Temperatures tonight will be 5 to 10 degrees warmer than Tuesday night as the southerly flow continues to modify our air mass.
Thursday
This will be the last day with moderately drier air for awhile. Highs likely will get into the mid- to upper-70s, but dewpoints should hang around 60 degrees which should be nice enough. Skies will remain mostly sunny, and winds will continue from the south. Lows on Thursday night won’t drop out of the 60s for most of the region.
Friday
Christmas Eve will be warm and mostly sunny, with highs near 80 degrees. Winds out of the south may become a bit more blowy, perhaps gusting up to 20 mph. As dewpoints rise, so too will humidity levels. Overnight temperatures will be in the upper 60s for most of the area.
Mele Kalikimaka-like temperatures for Houston on Christmas Day. (Weather Bell)
Christmas Day
Christmas will see unseasonably warm weather, with highs likely in the low 80s for most of Houston. At least it will be sunny, with a zero percent chance of rain. If you went all Clark Griswold and bought the family a swimming pool this year, feel free to take a dip. Expect another warm night.
Next week
It now appears as though the possible front for early next week won’t make it, so we’re staring at a warm final week of 2021. Expect highs around 80 degrees and nights likely in the 60s. There probably will be a few more clouds, but rain chances remain low to very low. The most likely window for the arrival of our next real cold front is New Year’s Eve or New Year’s Day. This should, at least, drive lows into the 40s or 50s.
Snowstorm?
We’ve started to see some chatter on social media about a “snowstorm” coming to Texas in the January 4 to 6 timeframe. First of all, if you’ve read Space City Weather for any period of time, you’ll know to have a sufficiently high sense of skepticism about model forecasts 10 days out, let alone 14 to 16 days.
The northern states are likely to be cold early in 2022, but how far south will the cold air blow? (Weather Bell)
With that said, a substantially colder air mass is likely to move into Canada and the northern tier of the United States during the first few days of the new year—we’re talking temperatures 10 or 20 degrees below zero in places like Minnesota. But we’re not sold on a significant chunk of that really cold air working its way across the United States and into Texas, let alone to find the right conditions for snowfall. So while a snowstorm in Houston is certainly possible in early January, it’s probably a 1-in-20 shot at this point. I’d not buy sleds for the kids’ Christmas just yet.
I emailed in the spring about my coworker who was putting pressure on herself to perform way outside of her job duties, including coming in to work when she was injured, monitoring her email on sick days, etc.
To the shock of no one, Hilaria quit a few months later, saying that the job created too much stress in her life and that she needed to find work that wasn’t as close to her personally (we worked in a niche branch of social services that mostly hires people with lived experience). Predictably, her clients were rankled at the disparity in service they received when transferred to colleagues who were working within their job description, but with some patience and explanation, everything sorted itself out.
The twist of the situation is that I also left shortly after her – I found out that a supervisor from another team in our organization had designed a new job description with me in mind. It would have been much closer to my background, skillset and professional goals, and also would have involved a substantial jump in pay. Apparently, my own supervisor had repeatedly blocked the idea of me transferring because they wouldn’t be able to “afford” to lose me from the team.
Turns out I was being paid significantly less than some of my colleagues (almost half in some cases) while performing the same job duties. The next-lowest paid person in the organization was apparently still making almost $10/hour more than me, and the proposed new job would have brought me up to that level. So I was being blocked from making what was considered the minimum for everyone else but me.
At the time I was hired, I was in recovery from substance use and a period of very poor mental health – I felt grateful to have been given a chance at all after a few years of spotty work history. I didn’t look into rates of pay and wouldn’t have felt like I was in a position to negotiate. Coming from a history of mostly non-profit/community based work, the (relatively low) hourly rate didn’t feel like much of a flag at the time.
The posting for my replacement was advertised at a pay range $10-15/hour more than I was making. No wonder they couldn’t “afford” to lose me – I was doing the same work as everyone else for pennies. Goes to show the dangers of working for organizations that emphasize the idea of being a “family.” The organization wasn’t actually a non-profit, but functioned with similar values, communication styles and structures – job seekers beware!
Anyways, now I’m working for a new organization and making the same as my old supervisor was – apparently my paygrade wasn’t based on lack of experience or expertise. I used a lot of interview and cover letter tips from this blog, actually!
See ya later, old organization. Hopefully I can meet up with Hilaria for drinks some day and laugh about what a disaster they were.
