Cowboy Who?

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This post, Mortification Week: the mud disaster, the dream lunch, and other stories to cringe over , was originally published by Alison Green on Ask a Manager.

It’s Mortification Week at Ask a Manager and all week long we’ll be revisiting ways we’ve mortified ourselves at work. Here are 15 mortifying stories to kick off today.

1. The exposure

This week I was woken up by a call from my manager asking where I was—our company meeting (virtual) had started. (I had managed to sleep through my alarms and was an hour late logging on.

In a panic, I jump out of bed, rush to my computer, and am pounding keys to try to get my computer and then zoom up and running as fast as possible. I am so stressed about this that I manage to not notice that, for the first time EVER my camera is on. And I am naked.

I drop to the floor PRAYING that my entire company has not seen me fully naked and spend what feels like hours (was like 30 seconds crawling on the floor with just my head slightly above my desk trying to figure out how to turn off a camera that I have never turned on.

A coworker did confirm that she watched it all and was laughing, but that nothing was shown that couldn’t be excused by claiming that I was wearing a tube top … still don’t know if that helps or not.

2. The naps

My company has a room designated for nursing mothers to pump breast milk, which can be reserved using the same system as our conference rooms. For some reason, though, management euphemistically decided to call this room the “Wellness Room,” and for several years before I realized the room’s true purpose, I — a young, cisgender man — would schedule time in the room to literally go take naps. I even used to refuse requests from my female colleagues with new children to move my block of time. What was I thinking??

3. The group call

Group audio call where VP said some smoke and mirrors fluff and I said aloud, “Yeah right.” I was NOT on mute and have a distinctive voice. Whoopsie ;-)

4. The group call, part 2

When chat systems were still kinda new, I was at work at a small-ish company. I was seated beside someone who was 1) loud, 2) repeated himself two to three times, and 3) was on a phone call. I messaged a friend, “OMG, make him stop talking! He’s repeated himself three times already! Even I know the answer!” Unfortunately, she was in a meeting, projecting her screen, with about 15 other people including our boss and grand-boss, and, well, I could hear the gales of laughter from my desk.

We all learned how to mute chat when in meetings after that.”

5. The group call, part 3

Many years ago I had a boss that literally no one liked. She was petty, rude, inflexible, and pretty much any other annoying trait you can think of. In a company re-org, three large offices had been folded into one so we worked at many different locations and didn’t really know each other.

One day we had a staff meeting that included about 15 of us in a conference room and everyone else, including the boss, dialed in from their locations. In the middle of our boss going on about some thing or another that we all needed to improve, someone joined late, pressed a phone key instead of saying his name, and didn’t mute. He was either talking to someone at his location or on another call at the same time.

We all got to hear him say out loud on the line something like, “Yeah, it’s another meeting with the old bag. Every meeting is literally useless.” He went on and on as the boss’s deputy, who was in the conference room with us, kept saying loudly, “You are not muted! Whoever is talking, your mic is live! Mute your mic! It’s a live mic! Mute your mic!”

As the insults continued to roll in via the clueless guy who must have not even had the phone up to his ear, both the boss and deputy boss just stopped talking as we listened to him complain about “all she ever does is yap yap yap, she doesn’t even understand our jobs.” Finally it stopped, and the boss said, “Did you want to go on? You have strong opinions about me, it seems.” Then a click and the computer phone lady said ‘*BEEP* has just left the call.’

We all sat in stunned silence. The man sitting next to me had been silently laughing for several minutes, his entire body shaking. I could feel the shaking next to me and when I looked at him when it was finally over I saw the tears running down his face. After a few moments my boss said, “Moving on” and continued like nothing had happened.”

6. The spill

I once spilled my drink into a vendor’s lap while at lunch – and then I started automatically wiping at his groin with my napkin. I am a woman and a mom, clearly, and he was a young man. We both nearly died.

7. The sample

In my early 20’s, I was working as a new receptionist in the OB/GYN clinic when a gentleman came in for his appointment. I couldn’t figure out for the life of me figure out why a man would be there, but tried to be cool about it. The doctor had requested I page him when the patient arrived (this was back in the 90’s), so there is this very nervous guy with a small paper bag that he set on the counter. I call the doctor and announce to everyone in the waiting room, “Mr. Smith is ready to come in the back.” After he left, the other receptionist had to explain to me why the guy turned bright red… Apparently, I’d named the exact reason why he was there.

8. The dream lunch

One time during an interview I was asked to name the person, alive or dead, that I would most want to have lunch with. I blurted out JonBenet Ramsay without even thinking of it. Shockingly, I did not get the job.

In my defense, that story was EVERYWHERE during my formative years and I really want to know who did it.

9. The AssMan

Once, long long ago, someone handed a resume back before online apps were a thing.

He had shortened Assistant Manager to AssMan several times.

Wasn’t hired for several other large red flags.

10. The outsourcing

My boss had asked me to do some follow-up phone calls, inviting donors to a gala for a client of ours. I felt awkward making these phone calls, and after a few, I was over it. I asked my friend (who had recently lost her job) if she wanted to make the calls, pretending to be me. I offered to pay her and take her out to dinner. I headed to the pool and took a secret day off.

She called one donor who was actually a close family friend of mine. I didn’t realize he was on the list. They small talked for about five minutes, him thinking it was me. When my friend eventually ask if he and his wife could come to the gala, he got confused – his wife had recently passed away. I even went to the funeral! My friend acted as if she just found out, saying she was so sorry to hear about his loss. I was absolutely mortified when she filled me in later.

11. The calendar entry

I decided to attend an on-campus lecture about sex trafficking and duly noted it on our shared work calendar.  See attached for how it actually showed up on said calendar.  That required some explaining… and comments about how it was marked as tentative. :-)

12. Tell me about yourself

In college, I once answered the question “tell me about yourself” with an entire family history and a talk about where I came from and my hobbies. Think along the lines of, “Well, I come from city, state and have 3 brothers and 2 nieces. My dog just turned three last week and likes to listen to me practice the trumpet.” I went on like that for a solid 2 minutes before they cut me off and continued the interview.

13. The mud

My embarrassing story just happened. I’m relatively new in my job, which is the first I’ve had with a more formal dress code and a conservative office culture. I bike to work once a week out of necessity which is very unusual in my area. Usually I bike in exercise clothes, and change and clean up when I get downtown before entering the building. I got caught in some unexpected rain a few days ago and I live on a dirt road. I was COVERED in mud head to toe. Like, I looked like I had just completed one of those mud obstacle courses. It was in my mouth. EVERYWHERE. And I was in town too early for anything to be open for me to clean up in before getting to my building. I ended up parking my bike by a river on a main road, climbing down the rocks to the water, and washing off my face, arms, and chest in the river before I changed my clothes. I still had mud on my face and shoes when I got inside. I was also so damp- I ended up asking my partner to bring me dry socks on my lunch break. But no one has said anything to me about seeing me in the river on their drive in, so hopefully I’ve gotten away with that. I’m not leaving the house without checking the weather again!

14. The grad student

I was still a grad student, so this was an on-campus, single first year course. There was another class right after mine. I regularly ran ten minutes over. Right there I am a self-absorbed ass. The grad student instructor finally comes up to me and says, “Please, you have to finish on time so my students can get seated.” I looked right at him and said, “Don’t be such an asshole, I’m not DONE.”

OMG.

Yeah, I found him after class and apologized. A lot. And stopped my class scrupulously on time from then on.

15. The dirty talk

My first office job, aged 21, working in the same place as my spouse. They had a shared office and I worked on the line. I opened their door, thinking they were alone, and launched into the raunchiest possible list of things I was going to do to them— their office mate had bent down to fill a file box and heard everything. I was mortified. Spouse was mortified. Office mate mortified. I don’t think I ever entered that office again, and now as a rule won’t work with my spouse ever again (for other valid reasons lol)

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There should be a safe word for TAing.

Today's News:

The world wasn’t built for this heat.

Europe is baking under heat so extreme that it’s causing train tracks to bend and roads to buckle.

The heat wave, which brought record-breaking temperatures to the UK, France, and elsewhere in the past two weeks, is exposing a frightening reality: Much of Europe isn’t built for extreme heat, or for a climate that’s swiftly changing.

While severe heat waves, fueled by climate change, have become the new reality of summer, the extreme temperatures now rolling through Europe seem especially catastrophic. On Tuesday, temperatures in the UK broke the national record, reaching 40.3 degrees Celsius (104.5 degrees Fahrenheit), and the weather agency declared its first-ever “red warning” for exceptional heat — the highest level of weather warning possible. France, meanwhile, saw more than 100 record-breaking temperatures across the country in the last week.

“Even as a climate scientist who studies this stuff, this is scary,” said Hannah Cloke, a professor at the University of Reading who studies natural hazards. “We have had heat waves in the UK before,” she added, but the severity of the forecasted heat “is enough to kill people and animals, damage property, and hobble the economy.”

Part of the problem is that many buildings, highways, and other infrastructure in Europe are old and built with outdated temperature extremes in mind, said Mikhail Chester, a professor of engineering at Arizona State University. They simply can’t tolerate the new normal, he said. Hence things like railway fires in London.

Cities like Dubai and Phoenix, Arizona, in contrast, can withstand higher temperature extremes because their infrastructure was built more recently and with heat in mind. While these places may face issues related to water and energy usage, 100-degree weather isn’t as big of a problem for them, Chester said.

It’s important that urban planners and politicians who oversee city budgets recognize that so-called temperate places can get really hot as the climate warms. It’s not just Europe, either. Roughly 40 million Americans living around the Great Plains were under heat alerts Tuesday, and last week the Texas power grid took emergency measures to avoid heat-related blackouts.

“It’s becoming so tough to ignore the reality that stuff just isn’t working as well as it has in the past,” Chester said. “You can’t hide from this.”

Images that popped up on social media this week are a warning of what the future holds — and a stark reminder that climate adaptation is essential.

The record temperatures warped metal rails and set train tracks on fire

You know it’s hot when steel railroad tracks start to warp.

This week, soaring temperatures caused steel rails in London to expand and buckle, as temperatures on the tracks reached nearly 120°F, according to Network Rail, an organization that manages the railway infrastructure in England, Scotland, and Wales.

“For some of our track, such high temperatures are more than our track is designed to cope with,” the organization explains on its website. “The problem is that when steel rails get hot, they expand, which can cause a buckled rail.”

In a tweet Monday, Network Rail said it was painting the rails white to keep them as cool as possible during the heat wave.

Railways aren’t only bending, but also catching fire under the extreme heat. Early last week, the network shared a photo of its tracks on fire, warning that the heat would be “a serious challenge.”

It’s also caused roads and runways to buckle

Scorching temperatures can also start to soften or warp roads. Earlier this week, a major road in Cambridge called A14 closed after it developed a large kink from the heat (you can see an image of it here).

Intense heat can even soften asphalt, Chester, the engineering professor, said. So when you drive a heavy vehicle like a garbage truck or school bus on a road during a severe heat wave, it can cause the road to “rut,” he said, or warp.

Extreme heat can also be a problem for runways (which are basically big roads). On Monday, Luton, a major airport in London, suspended flights after the heat caused a section of runway to “lift,” the airport said on Twitter. (It resumed flights later that day.)

Heat-fueled wildfires threaten buildings and transit infrastructure

Extreme temperatures can suck moisture out of vegetation, turning it into a tinderbox. So it’s no surprise that wildfires have erupted in recent weeks across France, Spain, and the UK, where tens of thousands of acres have burned, causing transit delays and threatening homes and buildings.

Pablo Blazquez Dominguez/Getty Images

Early this week, a passenger on a train traveling through Zamora, Spain, captured a terrifying scene: Outside the window — where the train had temporarily stopped — a bright red wildfire raged near the tracks. Train services in the area were suspended for a day and a half because of the fire.

Air conditioning isn’t standard in much of Europe. Commuters felt the heat.

Air conditioning is relatively rare in most of northern Europe, especially compared to the United States. The same is true of the London Tube — only 40 percent of the train network has air conditioning, and authorities warned commuters in the British capital to carry water with them if they traveled.

As Vox’s Umair Irfan has explained, extreme heat is an immense health risk:

Extreme heat is one of the deadliest weather phenomena in the world. There are direct health effects like heat stroke, which occurs when body temperature rises to 104 degrees Fahrenheit, leading to organ failure, and heat exhaustion ... But high temperatures can also worsen conditions like high blood pressure and can limit the effectiveness of certain medications.

European commuters face tough choices. They must either bear the heat and suffer, or avoid (perhaps important) travel. And they need to make that choice because the system was simply not designed for the heat.

Aaron Chown/PA Images via Getty Images

Angel Garcia/Bloomberg via Getty Images

To protect vital infrastructure, cut back carbon emissions

Heat waves are a symptom of the larger problem of climate change, and the best way to safeguard our highways, railways, and buildings is to tackle the root cause by lowering greenhouse gas emissions. Climate-fueled disasters are likely to get worse before they get better.

But emissions reductions take time and money, and there are some things cities can do in the interim, Chester said. The most obvious one is to update infrastructure to reflect the reality of climate change. “We probably need to be designing well past what the minimum regulation tells us, which, by the way, is often based on historical temperatures,” he said.

In other words, architects and civil engineers should be building like it’s, say, 2060, rather than 1960.

Revamping infrastructure is expensive, so we should also be turning to other solutions to make cities more resilient, Chester said, such as green infrastructure. Planting trees, for example, could help reduce urban heat islands (though they also require water).

These solutions are clearly urgent, considering what this week has brought. The start of the summer has been a signal of what’s to come, and there are still two months left.

Europe is just the beginning. Heat waves are the new baseline, and countries around the world will have to decide quickly whether they wish to take real climate action or accept a future of extreme heat and the pain that comes with it. Neither path is easy. Only one will lead to less suffering.

Haley Carter learned a valuable lesson recently: If you want to be the Grand Marshal of an Independence Day parade, it helps to be a Marine, a star soccer pro, and an honors graduate of the United States Naval Academy in Annapolis, Maryland.

You just can’t tell Governor Greg Abbott to go fuck himself. 

A few weeks ago, Friendswood’s Parks & Recreation department announced that Carter, a Friendswood native, would headline this year’s Fourth of July Parade. A barrage of criticism and threats based on old social-media posts forced her to step down. 

I’m not from Friendswood, but I wasn’t surprised when I heard about this. It’s just another example of what happens when a decent person with liberal leanings makes their voice heard in that community—a few years ago, gay school-board candidate Dakota Carter came under attack from Republican residents who feared he’d promote “the LGBTQ agenda” to impressionable youngsters.

In addition to being a lifetime Girl Scout, Carter competed in NCAA Division 1 soccer in college, after which she served as a Marine Corps Logistics Officer in Operation Iraqi Freedom and played women’s soccer professionally. While it’s obvious she was qualified to headline this patriotic spectacle, critics dug up dirt on her social media pages, where Carter, a staunch supporter of gun reform, told our governor to “get fucked” after he said that “the status quo is unacceptable” and “all options are on the table” when someone asked him about a potential special legislative session aimed at curbing mass shootings back in May. 

Somebody also found a Facebook post with a photo of her son Harper outside the Flamingo Las Vegas with a caption saying that he “can’t wait to watch his favorite Queen, [drag performer] Ginger Minj, perform tonight … Love this kid.” (Minj themself jumped in with a supportive tweet for Carter.)

According to naysayers, she’s a “communist” and a “gun-grabber” who’s also into drag and trans activism. That’s what Houston-based, nationally syndicated radio host Jesse Kelly called her on Twitter. This guy fanned the flames the most, tweeting out the number for Friendswood Parks & Rec. and encouraged his minions to call and complain. 

The same day, the city announced that Carter had voluntarily stepped down “after receiving threats of harm to herself and her family.” A swole-in-the-chest Kelly later boasted about this victory when Mayor Sylvester Turner tweeted about his disappointment. 

“If you’re looking for someone to blame, Mayor, you should know that it’s me who did this,” he tweeted. “I stopped your communist friend from representing a great community.” (Yeah, inciting people to harass a veteran isn’t something to be proud of, Skippy.) 

The parade went on as planned, but without a Grand Marshal. 

This ordeal has been a ludicrous thing to witness. A bunch of angry, white—I mean, right—-wingers thought Carter wasn’t worthy because she’s tired of mass shootings and her kid finds drag queens entertaining (newsflash: They are!). Did they think she was going to be on a float blasting Ani DiFranco music, screaming “my body, my choice” (newsflash: It is!)? Throwing bottles of kombucha to the kids while blasting all the Trumpers with a ray of wokeness beaming out of her chest like a goddamn Care Bear? 

For an area that sits near the former Brio Superfund site—where, for a quarter-century, unprocessed petroleum, waste materials, and other chemicals eventually seeped into the air and groundwater—Friendswood still can’t shake off its aura of toxicity. It prides itself on being one of the safest communities in the state, but that’s mostly because it’s also one of the many Texas suburbs with a heavy number of concealed weapons permits. (It still can’t beat League City!) Its rep is conservative, rich, and white. White folk make up 84 percent of the population with Asians in second place with 8 percent.

The town’s lack of diversity would explain the occasional bits of wrongheadedness that end up being news fodder. Just last year, The Harris County District Attorney’s Office began reviewing more than 200 arrests connected to Friendswood officer Sara Carter, who in 2017 admitted to initiating traffic stops without probable cause. And who can forget that 2019 cellphone video of a white guy at an AT&T store yelling insults at a minority employee named “Mo.” 

“People like this are the reason our country is going to what it’s going to,” he said. “’Cause I’ve been killing his kind for longer than you’ve probably been alive.” 

The guy, whose last name is—I kid you not—Christian, was arrested for public intoxication and disorderly conduct.

Friendswood isn’t completely filled with the putrid and the problematic. (They are just the loudest.) Many Friendswood residents on the Friendswood Parks & Rec.’s Facebook page voiced their disgust for those who pressured Carter to step down. Filmmaker and Friendswood resident Michelle Mower said that more liberal townsfolk should be more vocal in order to prevent straight-up hate like this from happening again. 

“I think it’s really gonna take a lot of us getting more active in the community and really, like, engaging people on a personal level,” Mower said. “Because I feel like what’s happened is that these talk-radio host guys, like the one who created this whole mess to begin with—they have Republicans literally hating Democrats. They think Democrats are evil. They think that we’re the enemy. We’re not the enemy—we’re their neighbors.”

The post Cancelled in Friendswood appeared first on The Texas Observer.

New Cyanide and Happiness Comic

The Swedish-born, New York City-based artist was famed for his gargantuan renditions of prosaic objects — a lipstick, a clothespin, a cherry perched on a spoon — installed as public art.

(Image credit: Leon Neal/Getty Images)

Yesterday, the artist Claes Oldenburg, who was known for his larger-than-life depictions of everyday objects, died at the age of 93.

Oldenburg began participating in performance art happenings in New York in the 1950s. Then, in 1961, he opened The Store, which is perhaps still his most famous project (it also served as an inspiration for many other artists.) A year later, elements from The Store traveled to Dallas, where the artist staged a happening at the Dallas Museum for Contemporary Arts.

Texas, with its abundance of space and its love for kitsch, would seem to have been a perfect canvas for Oldenburg. The state’s museums have moderate holdings of his work — many drawings and prints, along with a few sculptures. Houston is home to one of his early large-scale public works, Geometric Mouse, Scale X.

Images of a mouse were longtime elements in Oldenburg’s work, initially appearing in 1963.

One large-scale piece that Texas hasn’t seen recently is Stake Hitch, which was commissioned in 1981 by the Dallas Museum of Art and installed in the museum’s newly opened Barrel Vault Galleries in 1984.

The work, which clocks in at 5,500 pounds, was deinstalled in 2002. On their website, Oldenburg and van Bruggen write of the project:

The challenge, as we saw it, was to reach the upper area of the vault and link it to the rest of the room. We proposed a sculpture in the form of a “stake”, sunk in the floor, to which a rope was tied that extended, in a long, taut curve into the ceiling of the vault. The imagined destination of the rope beyond the Museum added to the scale of the work and gave it an outdoor character. The part of the sculpture sunk into the floor remained mysterious as well: the bottom of the “stake” was executed in full detail but since the part occupied the Museum’s receiving area, it was not available for public viewing. The sculpture in effect became a part of the architecture, a fact recognized both by Barnes and the director of the Museum, Harry Parker.

They continued, telling the story of the piece’s removal:

In June 2001, a new Director of the Museum, John Lane announced his plan to remove the Stake Hitch, which he considered an obstacle to “an active program of temporary exhibitions.” We refused alternative sites for the sculpture, Coosje stating “The Stake Hitch was made for one site only and has no value elsewhere.” Unfortunately a 1990 federal law making it difficult to remove site-specific works relates only to projects done after that date.

Despite its status as an icon of the Museum and one of the “Top Ten Treasures” in the permanent collection prominently featured in the guide to the Museum, and its identification as an icon of Dallas, the sculpture was removed on August 22. The Sol LeWitt mural remains in place and Museum officials have promised that the Stake Hitch would be re-installed for a year during the decade after its removal. At this moment in time, six years later, no plans have been announced for its re-installation.

Monument to the Last Horse honors Louie, the last horse of the First U. S. Cavalry, which used to call the Chinati Foundation’s site, Fort D. A. Russell, home. On its way to Marfa, Oldenburg and van Bruggen’s monument summered “in front of Mies van der Rohe’s Seagram Building on Park Avenue, in New York City.”

Longtime Houston museum goers will recognize the above piece, which, before the opening of the museum’s new Kinder Building, sat for years either in storage or in a high-ceilinged gallery alongside ab-ex paintings. The sculpture has long been a favorite of mine. It appears to have yellowed over time (it was made in 1967 and almost immediately purchased for the museum by John and Dominique de Menil), but it’s still, in concept and in function, one of Oldenburg’s funniest sculptures. The joke is simple: a fan works because of its rigidity; no rigidity equals an ineffectual, comedic flopping mess. When the work has its fabric cord and plug splayed out across the floor, the punch line is even better.

I referenced Oldenburg in an article I wrote about Wayne Thiebaud, following his death last year (please excuse my self-quoting): “The fact that [Thiebaud] was alive (and still working) in itself was remarkable. His generation of artists is that of myth and legend; they’re so iconic, so revered, so entrenched in their own history, that you might think they died long ago. Jasper Johns (born in 1930) is still kicking it, as is Claes Oldenburg (born in 1929). We’ve lost a few of these legends in recent years…and every time we do, the shock isn’t so much that we’ve lost a great, but that they were still around in the first place.”

Oldenburg’s most important creative partner and spouse, Coosje van Bruggen, died in 2009 at the age of 66.

We’re fortunate that we got so much time with Oldenburg. And we’re lucky that such a great number of museums, cities, municipalities, and other entities trusted him and van Bruggen to impart their vision on public spaces. I think we’re all better for it.

The post Soft Fans and Stake Hitches: RIP Claes Oldenburg appeared first on Glasstire.

This post, should I tell my boss I have a crush on him, I got in trouble for tracking my coworkers’ time off, and more , was originally published by Alison Green on Ask a Manager.

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…

1. Should I tell my boss I have a crush on him?

Okay, this sounds really bad but I swear it’s not like that. I started this role about a month ago now, and one of my direct managers (I have two) I find wildly attractive. He is a couple years older than me and married with kids. I am in a very happy and loving relationship and would never come between his or leave my own.

That being said, I am a woman in my late 20’s and I will say I know I am far from ugly. I am not trying to flex, I am just being honest with it. I work in a field that’s about 20/700 women vs men. My manager has made a couple comments to me about how the “guys around here aren’t used to seeing women who look like (you) … that’s about all I am allowed to say.” This was very flattering and not in a weird way — we were talking about if how there were issues with guys here, I need to report them right away.

Fast forward to now, we talk every day (work-related) and text here and there (99% work-related) with the occasional picture from his bike ride view. Both my managers communicate with me like this and we joke around with each other often, but it never crosses a line.

I just cannot get over this dumb little crush I have. Do I mention it to him and apologize if anything I do say/do ever comes off inappropriate? I don’t think it has, but I have become very hyperaware of how I am around him and sometimes I struggle to focus. Let me be clear he has never ever fueled this crush of mine, and does talk about his family often.

Definitely don’t say anything about it to him — it will make it awkward for both of you and will put him in an especially uncomfortable position as your boss. Plus a lot of people take that kind of confession not as an effort to explain your behavior but as an attempt to test the waters for reciprocal attraction. (And often that’s exactly what it is, even if not consciously.)

Relationship advisors often recommend responding to crushes by channeling more energy into your primary relationship and focusing on trying to find excitement there. The biggest thing, though, is not to feed it — don’t indulge in daydreams, don’t get into “what if” thinking, don’t analyze his behavior for signs of attraction back, and maybe pull back on the social behavior. Crushes are normal, even when you’re committed to someone else, but it should go away in time as long as you want it to go away.

2. I got in trouble for tracking my coworkers’ time off

I was written up for writing down coworkers’ absences in my calendar, just so my manager would know because she has the tendency to forget. She once put down that a coworker was off for two days when really she left early one day and was gone the next day, and that team member didn’t get paid for her full time. I don’t put reasons why the person called out, I just put “out of office.” I also put down lunch times on my calendar once in a while when a team member wanted to switch lunches with me.

A coworker complained without letting me know that she was uncomfortable. If she had told me it made her uncomfortable, I would have been okay with removing it. My manager never gave me a warning and wrote me up. It seems like every small thing I think is innocent, they make it a big thing. I don’t know why it’s a big issue, and I’m not sure if she just doesn’t like me.

Even though you did it with the intent of helping your coworkers, it was an overstep. It’s not your job to track that kind of thing and a lot of people would feel uncomfortable having a peer track their time off (especially if they didn’t know your reason, since it’s easy to assume you were tracking for less altruistic purposes). People who want to make sure their time off is recorded correctly have the option of writing it down themselves if they want to.

It is possible your manager just doesn’t like you — and it sounds like there are other issues with her — but this particular thing was reasonable to take issue with (although writing you up was excessive; she should have just told you to stop).

3. Telling an intern her English isn’t good enough for our field

I am a native English speaker now living in a European country. I am a team manager in a company that has English as its working language (although plenty of communication happens in the native language). One of the interns we hired has borderline-quality English — which we knew when we hired her, as her CV looked great! — but it’s proven to be a problem, especially for my non-native-English colleagues even if their English is fine.

As it’s “only” a summer internship, our hiring criteria were quite generous and we were very open to taking a risk. However, my non-native-English colleagues have said that she’ll struggle to be hired full-time anywhere in this country with her current language skills. (In our field, only English is necessary in this area of the country — the native language is only a bonus.) I agree, and have pondered privately that I’d only hire her if she could take intensive language and accent instruction for a couple of months.

I feel awkward talking to her about it, especially as her professional work for us seems to be going pretty well. As her line manager for the internship, is this appropriate to talk to her about, or is it best left alone?

Tell her! It’s in her interests to know that she has a skill she’d need to strengthen if she wants to work in your field full-time — just like you’d presumably tell her if she needed to take an Excel class or work on her public speaking. Frame it as part of the normal feedback process you always do with interns — maybe a mid-internship check-in where you talk about what strengths you’re seeing and what areas she will need to shore up if she wants to work in your field.

4. Promotion went through just as I put in my two weeks notice

As my manager was sealing the deal on my long overdue and well-earned promotion and title bump at a large nonprofit I loyally served for several years, I received and accepted a job offer at another company, doubled my pay, and got a great title bump. I followed your advice and knew I had to angle for the promotion at my old job despite the fact that I was actively job-searching. In fact, I had been pushing for that promotion for years. I’m confident that my promotion was officially signed off upon during my two weeks notice period, but understandably I was never officially anointed with my new title or increased salary. When my old job was posted online, the posting reflected the new title that I had fought for and achieved for the position. I’m happy about that and feel that it’s a great win for a position itself and the new hire.

Is there a way I can reflect my old position’s title bump on my resume/LinkedIn? I don’t want to lie about my title, but I feel like there’s some gray area given the fact that I earned the new title and the promotion was signed off on while I was still employed at my old job. Would it be weird to check with my old company’s HR about this? Or do I leave the title alone on my resume/LinkedIn, but adjust the bullets to reflect the fact that I earned a promotion just before leaving?

You can’t really list the new title because it was never officially yours. In theory you could write something like “position evolved to director of oatmeal promotion near the end of my tenure” … but that’s not going to strike most hiring managers as significant enough that it’ll carry much weight. (And if it does grab their attention and they ask you about it and your response has to be that you pushed for the new title but never actually held it, it’ll seem like an odd thing to have included.) It’s bad timing, but I think you’ve got to accept it’s not something you can use on your resume.

5. Cover letters when you’re not sure you want the job

There’s a position that I’m very qualified for but I’m not sure I want; it will depend on things that I can’t find out until the interview (for industry-specific non-negotiable reasons, just trust me). I assume I don’t want to say that in my cover letter, though, so should the letter simply focus on why I’d be good, and omit why I’m excited about the position?

(This is with an organization that I regularly interact with in my current job, by the way, so should I get an interview, I’d love your thought on whether or how to convey “I love my current job and would only come to your organization if you could give me a better one,” in a way that doesn’t potentially insult or burn bridges with the interviewing organization.)

The most important thing for your cover letter to focus on is always why you’d be good at the job. If you can add in a line or two explaining why you’d be excited about it too, great — but it’s not a big deal if your focus is just on evidence that you’d excel at it.

However, it’s always the case that you can’t be sure you’ll want a job until you get more information in the interview (although people often lose sight of that). So having big outstanding questions doesn’t preclude you from talking about what’s compelling to you about the job thus far. Presumably there are reasons you’re drawn to the work, and you can mention those (although, again, that shouldn’t be your main focus anyway).

On your second question, it’s very normal not to be willing to leave your current job unless you’re offered something better so you don’t need to spell that out. It’s assumed! But you could definitely make a point of mentioning that you’re very happy where you are currently, although open to moving for the right position.

Complete Home Decorating
Devitt
1978

Looking for a retro look? Want to induce nausea or maybe dizziness and headaches? Good for you! This book has that and much more! In many ways this book is a salute to home decor for the 1970s.

• Harvest Gold and Avocado Green
• Giant overpowering prints for wallpaper
• Stripes and more stripes
• Bean Bag Chairs

There are even a few quirks, such as a doll collection,a combo TV/Sewing center, and some weird accent pieces or “Objet d’art” – particularly, that planter in the shape of a head.

Mary

 

 

 

 

The post Retro 70s Decor appeared first on Awful Library Books.

1. “We are the only poets, everyone else is prose.”

2. “My life had stood a loaded gun.”

3. “Jealousy is the cousin, the cousin of greed.”

4. “She dealt her pretty words like blades, how glittering they shone.”

5. “Would you be the savior of the broken? The beaten? The damned?”

6. “The coast disappeared when the sea drowned the sun.”

7. “Hope dangles on a string, like slow spinning redemption.”

8. “Parting is all we know of heaven, and all we need of hell.”

9. “I am nobody, who are you? Are you nobody too?”

10. “Pain make your way to me and I’ll always be just so inviting.”

11. “Just like the match you strike to incinerate, the lives of everyone you know.”

12. “It might be lonelier, without the loneliness.”

Emily Dickinson: 1, 2, 4, 8, 9, 12
Emo lyric: 3 (Cute Is What We Aim For), 5 (My Chemical Romance), 6 (Death Cab for Cutie), 7 (Dashboard Confessional), 10 (Paramore), 11 (My Chemical Romance)

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This post, Mortification Week: the nosy father, the dish of bacon, and other stories to cringe over , was originally published by Alison Green on Ask a Manager.

Welcome to Mortification Week, where we’ll be talking all week about how we’ve mortified ourselves at work.

To start us off, here are 17 stories people have shared here (or submitted via email) about work moments they now cringe over.

1. The Italian

This story takes place in the time when email use was widespread, but Google Translate didn’t work very well.

While preparing for my Italian vacation, I somehow signed myself up for an aggressive email list. It was in Italian, and I just couldn’t figure out how to unsubscribe.

At the time, I worked for a company where it was part of the culture to use the all-staff email list for casual, non-work conversations: cookies in the break room, an interesting book, etc. I usually didn’t participate because I was too shy to broadcast my thoughts like that.

But here, I thought, was a perfect opportunity to be bold — surely one of the many clever people at this large company could help. I would ask them to get me off of the email list, using their Italian-language skills.

Unfortunately, the email I wrote — to all staff — had a brief description of my problem, then concluded: “Can anyone get me off using Italian?” I never lived it down (and never did get removed from the email list).

2. The attack

One time, outside of my cubicle, near the coffee pot, a group was chatting. I was on a phone call with a really sexist guy, and I was getting irate I finally hung up, and went out to complain to my coworkers. I said to them, “I was so mad, I wanted to reach into the phone, grab him by the neck and yank him out.” When I said “yank,” I made the appropriate motion, and my elbow went violently behind me.

Just at that exact time, a guy was walking behind me, and I elbowed him right in the middle of his face. He fell down and put his hands over his face while he laid on the floor. I said, “Oh my God! Are you okay?” He slowly got up and said, “I think I lost my train of thought” and walked away.

The next morning he came into work, and I was mortified. He had stitches between his eyebrows and had to wear his prescription sunglasses because I broke his normal glasses.

About a month later, a couple of people from HR came over to my cube and asked if I could follow them to chat. I did, and they asked me how I got along with this guy. I told him we got along just fine. Well, it turns out that since the incident happened at work, he had to file a workman’s comp claim, and to answer the question about what happened, he wrote “Attacked by fellow employee.”

I asked him about it and he told me that he didn’t actually write that, but that there were a bunch of options to check and he said that it was the closest to what happened.

3. The disclosure

When I was applying for my first professional job, I had no idea about the best version of the truth – I was just deadly honest. They asked me for my worst flaw and I told them everything I thought was wrong with me. EVERYTHING. I didn’t get the job, of course, and the interviewer actually called one of my references and told her to teach me some proper interviewing skills. I’m sort of convinced that woman saved my career.

4. The restroom

A friend of mine had an amusing related incident when she first got a job in London (she’s American). She needed to ask her boss where the bathroom was but wanted to sound professional/maybe vaguely knew Brits don’t say “bathroom.” So, mid-morning on her first day of work, she asked him to direct her to “the restroom.” He gave her a VERY strange look and said “there’s a couch in that room over there if you need to rest.” What a first impression!

5. The dad

I was moving back to my home country (but a different city) after 20+ years abroad. My parents had moved to this new city around the same time I moved abroad and I was planning to stay with them for the first few months to give me time to find somewhere to live.

My dad offered to scope out a driving route and parking options near my new job – great. But I was mortified on my first day when one of my colleagues said, “Oh yes, I was chatting to your dad in the lobby and brought him up to see the office.” I’m in my 50s and moved to / lived in another country for decades. I didn’t need my dad checking out my job like I was a teenager! Figuring out a good route traffic-wise; helpful. Hanging about in the building lobby until someone took him up to the restricted level and let him into the office; embarrassing as all f*ck.

6. The kids

When I was in high school, I applied for a job as a in-between-theater-classes supervisor for a kids theater program for 6-8 year olds. In the interview, the manager asked if I had worked with children before. “No, I don’t really like kids,” I said. It was true. But I didn’t get the job.

7. The bacon

Once I took an entire chafing dish of leftover bacon (with catering’s permission) from a company breakfast. It was several pounds of cooked bacon. Everyone saw.

8. The strength

I applied for a summer job between junior and senior year of college. I was late for the interview and when they asked what my strengths were I said, “Punctuality.” What an idiot.

9. The bread machine

My first professional job out of college, I worked at a truly terrible place that was so soul-sucking and horrific I really believe I could write a book about it. I hated working there and was desperate to find anything that would give me even a small amount of joy. Almost everyone else working there was also a fresh grad (because they couldn’t retain employees). My team concocted an idea to bring my bread machine into work and bake fresh bread every day. I don’t know why we thought this was ok. But there we were, with my bread machine plugged in in its own cubicle. We’d mix up the ingredients and the bread would bake, but because it was an open office floor plan, the entire building would smell like fresh baked bread. We didn’t share. We’d just pull the bread out, slice it, slather it with butter and chomp away in full view of everyone. One time, the bread machine caused a shortage along the entire row of outlets and caused everyone’s computers to die. These were all graphic designers. Anything unsaved was totally lost and we were NOT popular.

We never used the bread machine again.

10. The swimsuit

The first summer I ever worked, I was working two jobs, one as a lifeguard, and one in a warehouse. The warehouse position did not have a dress code, and the lifeguard position specified that we had to be in visible swimwear at all times. As I got more comfortable in commuting between the two, I started picking up extra time at one or the other – letting a shift run late, etc.

Eventually (like eight days in), I came to the conclusion that I could earn an extra $8.75 each day by not having to change outfits between the jobs, so I started wearing the swimsuit while working in the warehouse in the mornings, before going and working afternoons as a lifeguard. Initially, I did so under sweats, but as the summer got hotter, and the heat waves started rolling in, and I began shedding my layers, one article of clothing each day. By the end of the week, I was doing the warehouse job entirely and only in my swimwear, and continued to do so for the rest of the summer.

None of the other warehouse workers, or management, ever said a word to me, but I look back and cringe – especially when I remember how the swimwear we were required to wear for that lifeguarding position was essentially a red and white version of the blue and black trunks Daniel Craig would later wear as James Bond.

11. The editing

Back in the 90s, at age 25, I landed my first salaried office job. After three months, I had my first-ever performance review. My supervisor took me into an office and presented the document for me to read while she watched me. It was riddled with typos and misspellings, so I … noted and corrected them. We wrapped up the meeting, we left the office, and she dropped her pleasant facade and ripped into me for having been so very inappropriate. (Frankly, I think she was more unprofessional than I was, at that point; I didn’t have the experience to know better.)

12. The break-up

First job out of college … executive assistant at a small professional association that worked out of a converted historic home at a prestigious college in the South. High degree of polish and professionalism expected, and I was the first person you saw when you came in the fancy front door.

My boyfriend of two years and I broke up and I brought that mess to work in the cringiest way. I had purchased a special journal just to process the break up and I would have it out on my desk all day, just writing in it every time I felt my feelings, and when I had breaks/lunch I would CURL UP on the couch in the sitting room just behind the foyer (my desk was in the foyer) and OPENLY CRY while I, again, wrote in my journal. I did this for a week, at least.

God bless the patience of my boss, who still wrote me a great recommendation when I left for grad school.

13. The flashing

This JUST HAPPENED. This is not my first job, or even my first professional job. I am late 30s and work for the government. And I just flashed my grandboss my boobs.

My direct manager was a personal friend prior to becoming my manager. And I just got a long awaited sternum tattoo (that goes between my boobs) while I was away on holiday. My first day back, he asked about it and I yanked my shirt up to show him. I was not wearing a bra, but I’d pulled my top up in such a way my tattoo was visible but my boobs were covered.

Until HIS boss, who was passing in the hall, asked what was going on, and I turned to show her … and in turning pulled my shirt more and out popped both my boobs.

I’m not sure who was more surprised, me, or my grandboss who just discovered I also have my nipples pierced.

14. The towel

I showered one morning, wrapped my hair up in my oversized towel turban and carried on with my morning routine. I never thought of it again — that is until I was sitting at my desk, working away, and I heard the office door open behind my cube. In that instant I simultaneously realized that was the CEO arriving early as usual, and the towel was most definitely still on my head. I had never done my hair and I never forgot the look on his face.

15. The ass

My colleague was writing an email to a person in another department who was notoriously frosty, let’s call her Jane. She meant to write, “Dear Jane, I look forward to receiving your assistance on Matter X,” but in the middle of typing someone came by and distracted her and she hit send thinking she’d finished her email. She had not. Instead she sent an email that said, “Dear Jane, I look forward to receiving your ass.”

Jane called instantly, thanked her for “the best laugh she’d had in 20 years” (she was in tears), confirmed that no one wanted to receive any part of her body, and was noticeably warmer to our entire department from that point on.

16. The lap dance

My significant other’s holiday party is NIIICE. Lots of good food, like excessive amounts and lavish displays of every appetizer, main dish, etc. you can think of. The same with the alcohol and open bar, there literally isn’t a bottom shelf option. No Bud Light. No cheap vodka. No Two Buck Chuck wine to be had. The dress code is relaxed and ranges from tailored suits to guys in Carhart hoodies. It’s a work party that we actually look forward to because it’s so laid back and we really do have a good time. The last one was in 2019, and it may be the last one period. Or at least the last one where drinking isn’t monitored.

At the last party, an employee’s guest decided to give his girlfriend a lap dance. In full view of, well, everyone. People around the couple were half-heartedly trying to get him to stop, but they increased to frantic levels of “OMG STOP!” once he took his shirt off and could tell he was fully committed. Eventually someone got him to stop by tackling him to the ground with his pants around his ankles and his belt still in his hand, waving it around like a lasso.

17. The fed-up boss

I was in a meeting for a new product test launch. It was really just for us to just listen to our product team describe what they’d done and how it would impact our customers. My manager forgot to mute himself and when our (admittedly long-winded) product manager launched into his speech, he said, “My GOD. Land the PLANE. I hate these people”. He then clearly zoned out, turned on music and started singing along. Four or so of us had to ping him before he realized, and abruptly disconnected. We never spoke of it again.

Texas State Rep. Joe Moody, who helped write the report on the shooting, says he hopes the investigation helps lawmakers improve policy going forward — particularly when it comes to gun control.

(Image credit: Chandan Khanna/AFP via Getty Images)

Good morning. I wanted nothing more than to start this week by writing a hopeful post about Houston’s forthcoming weather—to say something about cooler weather ahead, more moderate nights, or a few days of steady rainfall and cloudy days. Alas, this is a reality-based site, and I’m sorry to say the rest of July looks very sunny, very hot, and mostly rain free.

Before jumping into the forecast, dreadful though it may be, I wanted to provide a situational update on our 100 degree days this year. These are officially recorded at Bush Intercontinental Airport, which is the city’s official monitoring station. Through Sunday, the city has now recorded 14 such days, which places this year second only to 1980 in terms of accumulation through July 17. Matt has been tracking these dates, and prepared the line chart below to show how this year (black line) compares to to most summers. Of note are years 1980 (Blue) and 2011 (pink).

Monday

High pressure is back, and it will be the dominant factor in our weather for the week ahead. This means mostly sunny skies for today, with highs near or above 100 degrees for inland areas, with highs in the low- to mid-90s near the coast. Winds will be light, out of the south or southwest at 5 to 10 mph. Lows will be sultry, only dropping to about 80 degrees in Houston. Rain chances are 10 percent or less, due to a capping inversion that is helping to prevent air at the surface from rising.

Tuesday

Rinse and repeat, although there will be precious little rinsing due to a lack of rain.

Wednesday and Thursday

Both of these days will be sunny, and perhaps a degree or two warmer as the high really takes hold.

Friday

Some sort of weak disturbance may attempt to pass over the area toward the end of the week, and this could bump up our rain chances to about 20 or possibly even 30 percent. It ain’t much, but it’s probably the best we’ll see this week.

Saturday and Sunday

These should be mostly sunny days, with highs of around 100 degrees. Rain chances at this point don’t look to be zero, but they are less than 20 percent.

Next week

If you’re looking to the extended forecast with some hope of a pattern change, I would say two things. First of all, congratulations on being an optimist. The worlds needs more of you. The second thing I would say is to remind you that August begins in 13 days.

Dear friends and family,

This Sunday, I will be making my debut as an actor in the HBO drama Tribal, where I play a character who is dragged behind a horse, fully nude, with several long shots of my penis. There will be a clear shot of my face, then my penis, then me covered in filth being dragged through dirt behind a horse, and then my penis. No CGI or stunt doubles were involved.

I would say if my little cousins want to watch, there is a ten-second close-up of my face where you don’t see my penis. Cover their eyes after that. There’s also a wider shot where you can’t really make out my penis, so they can probably watch that. The rest of the scene is entirely my penis.

By the end of the horse dragging, my face was covered in dirt, so you probably won’t recognize me. Also, the director had to do a lot of close-ups of my penis as if to tell viewers, “Hey, this is the same guy. He was clean-faced before the torture, but now he is dirty-faced from all the horse-dragging. You want proof? Look at his penis. Same penis.”

All the years of acting classes and auditioning have finally paid off. I asked whether I could give my parents special thanks in the credits for their support throughout my acting journey, but the producers said absolutely not. I got a talking-to from the casting director about never making eye contact with executives on set again. Mom and Dad, please know that I wanted a special note to you in there, right below my credit as “Dragged Penis Guy.”

Our ten-year high school reunion is coming up, and I can’t wait to see the look on everyone’s faces, knowing I did what I said I’d do—make it as an actor. It would be great if we could show the scene at some point during the festivities, and I could break it down and give my thought process behind the performance. Possibly a Q&A afterward?

For example, the cinematographer and I talked long into the night about how detailed the shoot would be. He wanted me to grimace, like, “Oh no, my poor penis!” I decided that my character would try to gyrate his hips so he wouldn’t get road rash. I worked with the film’s trainer, who shrugged off my questions about what kind of exercises are best to toughen my buttocks.

I think people would also be interested to learn that at the end of the scene when the tribe urinates on me, the director made an artistic decision to juxtapose the tribespeople’s healthy penises with my bruised, filthy penis. Their joyous laughter and dancing in the shot greatly contrast my crying and mumbling about how much my penis hurts.

I’m very excited for my debut and for the whole family to watch, including Grandma and her friends from church bingo. I wanted to warn you that there are a few curse words, so maybe we just show Grandma my scenes so she doesn’t hear that bad language.

I actually did curse quite a bit, usually whenever my penis hit a rock. Those were my real reactions, but the director took all of them out. He said one rock was so tiny that it didn’t make sense that I would yell as many curses as loudly as I did, so he had to cut it. All due respect to the director, but maybe my character has an extremely sensitive penis?

To be fair, my character was not supposed to speak English—he spoke a made-up language of an ancient fictional warrior tribe—so I guess it wouldn’t be fitting for my character to say, “Oh, my penis! Stop filming! Gravel is going up my urethra!” I mean, I get why they had a voice-over guy dub my lines, but in my defense, my reaction was authentic. James Dean, Paul Newman, Marlon Brando, and I all agree: method is the best kind of acting.

Fun behind-the-scenes tidbit: You can still hear a little bit of my screaming about my penis in the background. The sound editors said I shrieked so loudly that they had trouble getting rid of the audio completely. It was a first for them.

Tell Uncle Manny he owes me twenty bucks. He said I’d never be on TV. I guess he’s eating his words now. Please don’t let Aunt Betsy watch the scene. She was always weird about seeing my penis.

Even though my character is technically dismembered and burned in a bonfire, I’m hoping they call me back next season, maybe as a ghost. They can show my healthy penis, perhaps making a statement about how everyone’s penis returns to healthy form in Valhalla, as my character’s tribe believed.

My agent called me this morning and said I’ve already been offered a role in a Hulu series as a customer who watches a bar fight and urinates himself in fear. Feels like this is the start of something special. Thanks again for all your support!

Love,
Peter

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I dunno, man, I'm just not really comfortable sticking my head into mysterious spore clouds these days.

Michael Crichton's 1973 film "Westworld," for all its world-building and thematic complexity, is a simple story at its core. Its structure of a guest attending the titular resort where robot facsimiles of people programmed to fulfill the guest's every whim go haywire and start murdering the humans around them is as direct as a slasher movie, and with its technophobia combined with cynicism about humanity skirting responsibility for its actions, it can even be called quintessential Crichton.

HBO's "Westworld" series, however, is a far more complex work. Creators and showrunners Lisa Joy and Jonathan Nolan have a taste for playing devious games with their audience as much as the characters in the series do with each other. One need look no further than the recently aired fourth episode of season 4, which among its many twists revealed that the first few episodes of the season were not just intercutting between different characters, but different timelines. It's a sneaky trick the show has pulled before, and by this point it's clear Joy and Nolan have made obfuscation and sleight of hand a mainstay of the series.

Yet for all the new characters and ideas "Westworld" the series has dived into, the show continually demonstrates a dedication to mining its source material. In the fourth season alone, the show is drawing inspiration from not just the '73 feature, but the film's sequel (1976's "Futureworld"), a failed 1980 TV series ("Beyond Westworld") and even other works related to the creators of "Westworld."

Beyond Westworld Provides A Loose Template For The First Half Of Westworld Season 4

Airing for just a few weeks on CBS in 1980 with a scant five episodes, "Beyond Westworld" was a failed attempt to serialize the "Westworld" concept. Its place in the continuity of the films was ambiguous from the start, seemingly retconning the events of the first film from being the result of an advanced computer virus to the dastardly deeds of an evil scientist, Simon Quaid (James Wainwright). The series then followed Delos employees John Moore (Jim McMullan) and Pamela Williams (Connie Sellecca) as they attempted to thwart Quaid's plans to take over the world using robot sleeper agents in key positions.

While robot "hosts" not knowing they're really hosts has been a staple of HBO's "Westworld" from the first season, it's in the first few episodes of season 4 where the host version of Charlotte Hale/Dolores (Tessa Thompson) is seen explicitly using sleeper agent hosts to do her bidding, positioning themselves to best achieve her goal: turning the bulk of humanity into programmable and controllable beings, flipping the script and allowing the robot slaves to be the new masters. It's a plan Quaid wouldn't have the vision for in "Beyond Westworld," and the host Maeve (Thandiwe Newton) and human Caleb (Aaron Paul) are a far more dynamic pair of investigative heroes than John and Pamela.

Futureworld Expanded The Westworld Concept, Laying The Groundwork For The Series

Of course, Charlotte Hale's sleeper hosts in "Westworld" season 4 aren't just any average people. Hale's plan involves replacing (or reprogramming via a parasite she's engineered within special flies who only attack humans) people of influence and authority. This is almost exactly the endgame of Dr. Morton Schneider (John Ryan) in 1976's "Futureworld."

"Futureworld," despite its flaws (such as a truly bizarre dream sequence that features the "return" of Yul Brynner's Gunslinger character from "Westworld"), is a movie that proved the "Westworld" universe had more stories in it besides technology run amok. In the film, written by Mayo Simon and George Schenck and directed by Richard T. Heffron, Delos has recovered from the "Westworld" disaster and now seeks to use a new version of the resort to lure important and influential people there so they can be scanned, murdered, and replaced with robots, the better for the corporation to literally own and run the world.

In fact, the same villainous plan has already been a part of the "Westworld" series, as seen in season 2, when it was revealed Delos had been secretly collecting and storing information on all its guests for future use. Where that information was first used against the world in the form of season 3's predictive supercomputer Rehoboam, it seems Hale is now using it (or a version of it) as originally intended, to replace and/or control the population.

Westworld Season 4's Flies Have A Possible Ancestor In The Ants Of Phase IV

The "Westworld" series' influences aren't limited to the various spinoffs and sequels to the original film, however. Prior seasons have pulled from a variety of source material for plotlines and visual references, from the works of author Philip K. Dick to the films of Sergio Leone to the "Grand Theft Auto" games, as mentioned in this 2016 New Yorker interview with Christopher Nolan and Lisa Joy.

While the writers haven't confirmed it, season 4's parasite-ridden flies — themselves a clever callback to the inciting incident of the series — may be partially inspired by the 1974 film "Phase IV." The movie — the only to be directed by prolific graphic designer Saul Bass — concerns a pair of scientists investigating a mysterious evolution of the planet's ant population, with the insects building enigmatic structures and attempting to communicate some message while manipulating events toward some unknown goal.

Although the ending of the film is left highly ambiguous, it seems the newly evolved ants are attempting to evolve humanity, too — if they want to accept being changed, that is. Bass' original ending contained a surrealistic sequence in which human beings who seemingly refuse such evolution are reduced to being programmed and experimented on, turned into slaves much like Hale's human victims. In any case, not only are the agents of transformation in "Phase IV" and "Westworld" season 4 both insects, but the screenwriter of "Phase IV" is Mayo Simon, co-writer of "Futureworld."

The Future Of Westworld May Still Lie In The Past

One theme of the "Westworld" series involves humans and hosts stuck in "loops," whether referring to their personalities allowing them to repeat the same mistakes, or history at large repeating itself. It's no surprise to realize the future of the show will likely involve elements from the past, whether it's directly tied to the "Westworld" universe or not.

Fans have name-checked "Futureworld" in their theories before, especially during the second season. At the start of season 4, "Futureworld" made a resurgence on Reddit, with people speculating that the woman known as Christina (Evan Rachel Wood) is secretly living in another park that's meant to emulate a future time period, as in the '76 film.

The fourth episode of season 4 somewhat confirms this, albeit with a nasty twist: Christina's world isn't a Delos park for human guests, but a cage for hapless human beings who've been transformed by Hale's flies and kept under her control. As the first episode of the season hinted at, Hale likely allows free-thinking hosts to visit the city as a similar tourist destination. In this way, this new primary time period for the series is simultaneously "Futureworld" and the plans of its villains made manifest, a future where the world is under the control of the powerful who have access to whatever and whoever they want.

Who knows where the back half of season 4 will take "Westworld" — elements of "Mad Max" and "Matrix" films are in place, with a conflict brewing between a scrappy resistance force and Hale's controlling forces. We'll find out soon enough, but if you're impatient, check out "Futureworld," "Phase IV" or "Beyond Westworld" for potential clues.

Investigate 1996's "Westworld 2000" first-person shooter computer game (complete with FMV!) at your own risk, however.

Read this next: The 14 Best Sci-Fi Shows On Amazon Prime

The post How Westworld Season 4 is Borrowing From the Franchise's Long, Bizarre Past appeared first on /Film.

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All I'm saying is it would work, work meaning extract money from the confused wealthy.

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This post, employer made me a counteroffer and then rescinded it, talking to a mediocre employee about leaving, and more , was originally published by Alison Green on Ask a Manager.

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…

1. My employer made me a counteroffer, then rescinded it

I received a job offer from a LargeCorp that was a great offer, a lateral move on a bigger scale than my job at SmallCorp, where I’ve been for five years. I gave notice at SmallCorp, and my grandboss called me later that afternoon and offered me a promotion I’d been waiting for for the last two years, and agreed to match the salary. There was another person party to this negotiation. I accepted, and was actually glad to be staying. Fast forward a week, and he rescinded the agreement, and now I’m not sure what I’m even being offered as a counter.

I am willing to go to LargeCorp. I have some reservations, but only about the company, not the people. Honestly I was really excited to stay based on some other factors, like I have an established reputation and a lot of flexibility, and grandboss (who can be a real jerk) is retiring in three months, and his replacement is very good, thank goodness.

I am not sure what, if anything, I can do. Luckily I had not notified LargeCorp that I was going to accept a counter, so that’s a viable option. Some of the commentary around rescinding my offer centered around age (I’m fairly young, particularly for the role) but I’ve done nothing but excel and receive highest marks on my performance reviews. Any sage advice?

Take the other offer. Your employer withdrew the counteroffer that had convinced you to stay, and so even if they offer you something else that entices you, you can’t rely on them keeping their word. They’ve already shown they have no qualms about making you an offer you might rely on and pulling it later. (What if you had already rejected the offer from LargeCorp based on their promise?)

You might be thinking this is all coming from your grandboss and he’s leaving in a few months, but if he’s the one with the power to make and pull offers right now, you’ve got to deal with the company as it is currently, not as things might (or might not) be after he leaves.

This is a person who has already shown he won’t negotiate in good faith. Take the other offer, the one you were already planning on before your grandboss set off this bomb.

Related: my company made a counter-offer to keep me — and now is attaching strings to it

2. Mediocre employee might take another job, but wants to keep working for us too

I run a small creative services business. We hired an employee almost two years ago, “Jamie.” Their attitude and perseverance are great, but their work lacks consistency. They aren’t progressing like we’d hoped, but they have just enough wins for us not to let them go. Jamie is more limited in their skill set than other team members, which means sometimes we scramble to put them to work on projects to which they aren’t well suited, which requires more babysitting. The other manager and I know that we should probably just let Jamie go.

Earlier this week, Jamie approached us with a job offer they received to teach at a local high school. They are very much a people pleaser and stated that they only want to take the job if they can still be a part of our organization in some capacity.

Jamie wants to contract for the last two hours of our day, after finishing duties at the high school. I could very much imagine a scenario as a win-win where when the right project comes up and we contract it out to Jamie, but I can’t guarantee this will be the case. We had a similar situation when Jamie started, in that they kept asking us to push back their start date, because they just couldn’t leave their previous team in a bad spot (despite giving them four weeks notice).

Jamie did express that this new job would be a pay cut, and that contacting would be necessary to supplement their income. Jamie has many connections and could contract with a lot of people. We would even feed Jamie projects with clients who aren’t a good fit for our shop. Should I try to nudge Jamie out the door to this new opportunity? If so, how? I’ve been honest in performance reviews that Jamie isn’t quite where we need them. Should I be more transparent about the potential of letting them go? Do we just let Jamie go, while we know they have a safety net to fall on?

Be as direct with Jamie as you can, because they deserve to have accurate information so they can make the best possible decisions for themselves. In this case, that should probably sound something like: “If you accept this new job, we might be able to send work to you if the right project comes along but I can’t guarantee that will happen, so I wouldn’t want you to count on that. I do want to be honest that we’ve continued to have the concerns about your work like X and Y that we’ve discussed in the past, and those concerns are serious enough we’ve considered whether we can keep you on in light of them. Because your job here could be in jeopardy if you stay, I want to encourage you to take this other job if you feel it’s right for you.”

Alternately, if you know you it’s highly likely you will fire Jamie if they don’t leave on their own — or at least you want to — say that clearly: “The work issues we’ve talked about previously are serious ones and things are at the point where there’s a strong chance we’d need to end your employment with us. Because of that, I strongly encourage you to take this other job if you feel it’s right for you.”

3. When do people learn business jargon?

I have a pretty low-stakes question, but it is something I have been thinking about for a while. In college I did not take any business classes and graduated with a liberal arts degree in 2009, meaning that I spent many years working as a bartender. When my body could not take it any longer, I made the transition to office jobs. I found that there were a lot of terms that I did not know that are mentioned quite often. Things like “evergreen,” “blue sky thinking,” and “bleeding edge.” Also stuff like what hierarchy order titles like associate, coordinator, specialist, and lead go in. Everyone just seems to know these things and I am wondering if it is a missing part of my education. Do business classes or majors learn these things in college? Are they things that you are expected to learn in entry-level roles? Or are they things that people toss around to look better and make others think they know what they are doing? This happened a lot with bartenders so I don’t know if it is the same patterns persisting in a different industry, or if I am just assuming the worst.

People don’t normally learn those terms in college; you tend to pick up jargon on the job (and often individual companies have their own jargon too). For the titles, with the exception of team lead, the hierarchy of the others can vary by company.

So there’s nothing missing from your education! You’ll just get more familiar with this stuff as you gain more experience in that world. Also, there’s new jargon all the time, and obscure jargon, and weird jargon — so very few (if any) people know all of it. You do get better at understanding it based on context though.

4. I got rejected after I’d already rejected them

A recruiter approached me via LinkedIn because she liked my profile. She asked for a resume, so I sent her one. She sent me a job description and told me what they were looking for as far as salary. It would have been 30% less than I’m making now. I told her that, and declined to go forward. This was a couple of weeks ago. Now they sent me a rejection email. WTAF? I already declined and they’re sending me an email rejecting me? Is this a thing? I didn’t even interview. It seems arrogant.

Yeah, it can be a thing. It’s usually just a bureaucratic mistake, not an attempt to send you any kind of message. Most likely you got marked in their system as out of the running when you declined and someone mistakenly thought that meant they needed to send you a rejection rather than it being clear to them (or their system) that you had already withdrawn.

5. Etiquette when resigning

I have been working as a contractor for six years for company A but placed at company B. I have recently decided to leave and have some good offers lined up. With your blog in mind, I will of course only resign after I signed the offer letter.

Over those six years, I never had much personal contact with company A; they only pay my salary and invite me to a company Christmas dinner every year. I understand that it is recommended to resign in person or over the phone, which is how I will inform my manager at company B. However, asking for a meeting with company A without a subject would be strange and asking for a meeting with the subject line “I want to discuss my resignation” seems redundant. What is the best way to proceed?

You have two options, depending on which one feels right. First, you can indeed ask for a call without naming the topic ahead of time — it’s okay to say something like, “I have a time-sensitive issue I need to speak with you about today or tomorrow.” (They might suspect what it’s about, but that’s okay; you’re not required to keep them from guessing ahead of time.) But with a distant relationship like the one you described, it’s also okay to resign via email — frame it as, “I wanted to let you know as soon as possible, but I’d be happy to set up a phone call to discuss the transition logistics whenever it’s convenient for you.”

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