Shared posts

21 Nov 15:53

Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Prime Factors


Hovertext: And a polynomial is just when you have more than one nomial.

New comic!
Today's News:

Londonoids! Only a few days left to submit your proposal for BAHFest London! 

19 Nov 19:52

The logic behind "I'd ~love~ to let refugees into the country because I'm not a monster, but what if there's a bad guy among them!!!" works exactly the same with babies, yet you don't see people arguing that all babies should be shipped out of the country until they are confirmed Good Guys. I wonder what the salient difference is. I really do. (it's racism)

Guilty Until Proven Innocent (if you’re black or brown). It’s the American way!

19 Nov 15:47

Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Simulations


Hovertext: C'monnnnn well thought-out hatemail.

New comic!
Today's News:

Thanks everyone for making that kickstarter our most successful SMBC book launch ever!

If you just missed it and still want in, we will briefly be offering pre-orders.  

17 Nov 22:31

news roundtable

by kris


“okay, let’s try a different tack — which of you is correct?”

20 Nov 16:17

Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Teaching


Hovertext: Seriously though, somebody explain this shit.

New comic!
Today's News:

 Yes, I am pretty pleased with myself.

17 Nov 21:30


18 Nov 05:00


Researchers just found the gene responsible for mistakenly thinking we've found the gene for specific things. It's the region between the start and the end of every chromosome, plus a few segments in our mitochondria.
18 Nov 15:21

Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Bacon is Literally Cancer


Hovertext: Weinersmith vs. WHO reporting, Round 1.

New comic!
Today's News:

 Our latest book did wildly better than expected. Thank you for your generosity and support! 

16 Nov 17:07

Do white lives matter ?

I guess the fact that white people aren’t systematically terrorized by the police, and also that literally every single part of society is set up to reinforce the idea that white people’s lives, comfort and continued prosperity are of primary importance means that the idea of white lives mattering goes without saying, and that anyone bothering to ask this is either a fucking idiot or a fucking idiot AND a racist trying to denigrate the idea that we should be reminded that victimized minorities have a right to remind people of their basic humanity.

PS. Seriously, fuck off.

14 Nov 15:33

Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - A New Discovery


Hovertext: Actually, you don't collapse anything. You just observe one of a multitude of flavorverses.

New comic!
Today's News:

To get a signed Weiner!


16 Nov 05:00


The last band of color indicates the snake's tolerance for being held before biting.
13 Nov 13:40

I was shooting for a wood care line when I had this email conversation with their designer.Client:...

I was shooting for a wood care line when I had this email conversation with their designer.

Client:  Why do all the file names say ’_Edit’ at the end?

Me: Because those are the retouched files.

Client: Oh, we don’t use retouched images, it’s dishonest. Please send us unedited files.

I send him SOOC [Straight Out Of Camera] jpegs in response.

Client: The wood floor looks bad, you can see the scratches in the wood, and some of the boards are chipped. Please send us unedited files with all these defects removed.

I send the first batch again with the “_Edit” at the end of the file name removed.

Client: Thank you!

13 Nov 15:20

Me: Here is the final pdf version of your sixteen-page booklet.Client: Awesome, can you send that to...

Me: Here is the final pdf version of your sixteen-page booklet.

Client: Awesome, can you send that to me as a jpg so I can print it?

12 Nov 14:35


by Ellie Shechet on The Muse, shared by Jia Tolentino to Jezebel

have yet to watch, but i thought it important to share

Missy Elliot has made her official return, and it is fucking excellent.


12 Nov 06:37

A Thief’s Welcome

by Greg Ross

Idaho farmer John Barnes patented this “coyote alarm” in 1903. Near his sheep pens he mounted a man-shaped scarecrow wearing a metal breastplate. In the breastplate was a cylinder “analogous to the cylinder of a revolver of large size” holding blank cartridges. A clockwork mechanism turned the cylinder, and a plunger dropped at intervals and fired a cartridge. Barnes would wind up the mechanism with a key at dusk, and the artificial farmer would fire its imaginary gun “every quarter of an hour throughout the night.” I wonder what the sheep thought of this.

This is actually less alarming than James Williams’ pest exterminator of 1882. That’s progress.

Please support Futility Closet on Patreon!

12 Nov 02:30

How many messages a week do you get from people asking you on your opinion of Bernie?

Bernie Mac is the best.

11 Nov 15:56

Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Accuracy in Kids' Shows



New comic!
Today's News:

Just under a week left! We have a chance to hit a record for most funding ever for an SMBC book! 

11 Nov 05:00

Linguistics Club

If that's too easy, you could try joining Tautology Club, which meets on the date of the Tautology Club meeting.
10 Nov 15:29

Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - A Simulation


Hovertext: Make the starshine upon the sea 3.1 percent more sublime.

New comic!
Today's News:

Only one week left! 

09 Nov 16:00

Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Other People


Hovertext: This month will exclusively consist of involved math jokes and insultingly stupid puns.

New comic!
Today's News:

Just 9 days to get your Weiners signed!

09 Nov 20:10

problematic faves

by kris


the world fantasy award decided to drop their award design that’s just a bust of lovecraft. it’s the right move. i like lovecraft’s writing a lot, and it was my first exposure to “cosmic horror” and the concept of a terrifyingly indifferent universe. but man, you’ll run smack into a super-racist passage and it yanks you straight out. bleah.

to borrow from longfellow: when lovecraft was good, he was very very good; but when he was bad, he was horrid.

to borrow from ice cube: bye felicia

09 Nov 21:30


07 Nov 21:21

Is it racist to think of police unions and their bombastic threats as the only real "thugs" in America?

No, there’s lots of other thugs, like the police themselves and anti-abortion people and etc.

07 Nov 18:42

CRULLER Intentions

by Justin Pierce

Next week: a strange man sells Wonderella a monorail. Leonard Nimoy guest stars.

08 Nov 16:02

Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - I OBJECT!


Not to mention bias in the sample

Hovertext: I'm off to a honeymoon to convince a couple they probably aren't soulmates!

New comic!
Today's News:

Only ten days left to get your Weiner signed

06 Nov 18:11

Misandrist Lullabies

Misandrist Lullabies:

By Mallory Ortberg

Hush, little baby, don’t say a word
Ever; your sister is talking

Little Miss Muffett
Sat on a tuffett
Eating her curds and whey.
It was illegal for white men to practice medicine

05 Nov 06:02

evil-wears-a-bow: twice-five-miles: thisisntmyrealhair: classi...





Why Star Trek matters.

Why representation matters too.

Everyone should know, in the 70s Nichelle Nichols went to NASA and asked why there weren’t black astronauts in the pipeline, and they said, “Come recruit for us.”  And she did.

“From the late 1970’s until the late 1980’s, NASA employed Nichelle Nichols to recruit new astronaut candidates. Many of her new recruits were women or members of racial and ethnic minorities, including Guion Bluford (the first African-American astronaut), Sally Ride (the first female American astronaut), Judith Resnik (one of the original set of female astronauts, who perished during the launch of the Challenger on January 28, 1986), and Ronald McNair (the second African-American astronaut, and another victim of the Challenger accident).“ (x)


05 Nov 04:52

mike3k: I found a piece of history

by joberholtzer

yeah, how could anyone possibly ever mess this up?


I found a piece of history

04 Nov 05:00

Water Delivery

When I was a kid, I asked my parents why our houses didn't have toothpaste pipes in addition to water ones. I'm strangely pleased to see Amazon thinking the same way.
04 Nov 16:02

Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Heaven


Hovertext: OH MY GOD I just realized we haven't accounted for relativity.

New comic!
Today's News: