Matt.weiland

Soon after the X-Files revival series was announced, NBC hopped on the reboot train with their decision to bring a new Coach series to the network. In April, a 13-episode straight-to-series order was placed on the followup to the original ’90s series. However, after months of development, Deadline is reporting the Craig T. Nelson-starring reboot is now dead in the water due to “creative issues”:

The series was set in the present, picking up 18 years after the ABC sitcom went off the air after nine seasons. Coach Fox (Nelson) — now retired from coaching — is called back to become assistant coach to his grown son, Tim (Andrew Ridings), who is the new head coach at an Ivy League school in Pennsylvania that is starting up a new team

Since the series order was placed by the network, only a pilot episode was filmed. This was allegedly NBC’s idea as they wanted to “take time to reevaluate the project” before moving on with the rest of the 12 episodes. The cast and crew received the news of the cancelation late Monday evening which is sure to be a disappointment to everyone involved. However, it looks like Nelson has some pretty stellar representation behind him as he is contractually obligated to receive pay for all 13 episodes, while the rest of the cast will only be compensated for the pilot episode referenced above.

With Fuller House in full (er) steam at Netflix and that Prison Break reboot in the works, there may be demand for another network or streaming service to pick up the project. And sure, this may be disappointing news for all involved, but I can’t help but wonder what the fate is of that Alf reboot series NBC threatened us all with. This is strange to say, but I kind of want me some of that.

(Via Deadline)

Check out Morgan Freeman on the set of this movie—he’s a mummy now.

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@thesimpsonstattoo

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»WEBSTA

I know, I know, we agreed Barbara was the worst. She didn’t have a personality, she didn’t really even have any sort of motivation, and her best moment last season was getting taken out by Leslie. At least two of those problems have been solved in this clip.

As we noted before, Gotham is going to open with a massive breakout at Arkham. And it appears Barbara has been sent there for that whole “killing her parents” thing. What I like about this clip, beyond Jerome’s response to Barbara’s crime, is that Barbara has, you know, a personality here. She does things! She doesn’t just sit there and whine! That she sticks it to Jerome there at least twice really helps matters as well.

Granted, this does raise the issue of whether she’ll disappear again as the show’s cast balloons, although if she keeps up the snarky femme fatale act, she would make a decent occasional guest star. Still, it’s a good thing to see that Gotham has managed to turn one of its worst characters into somebody we can actually tolerate. Now, if Fish Mooney can just stay dead and we can get more of Oswald’s mom?

(Via Comic Book Movie)

A talented Star Wars fan named Lindsey (also known as Skygawker) decided to see what would happen when one combines satirical headlines from The Onion with fitting screencaps from Star Wars movies (Many Bothans died, we’re assuming). Her multi-part series called “Star Wars + Onion Headlines” goes in hard with the Anakin Skywalker hate. Ah yes, let the hate flow through you.

We’ve collected a sampling of our favorite creative juxtapositions below. Check out the rest of “Star Wars + Onion Headlines” at Skygawker’s page HERE and HERE. There’s also a version for The Clone Wars, if you’re feeling animated.

(Via Skygawker here and here)

In a recent video by Muppet Studios for the Oh My Disney blog, Rowlf the Dog performed a dramatic reading of the Disney Haunted Mansion theme “Grim Grinning Ghosts” with a goofy spirit behind him to act out each part described in the song, especially the socializing.

When the crypt doors creak and the tombstones quake
Spooks come out for a screaming wake
Happy haunts materialize and begin to vocalize
Grim grinning ghosts come out to socialize

Deadline acquisition Yoenis Cespedes’s eighth-inning home run put the finishing touches on the Mets’ 3-0 win over the Rockies last night, a victory that put them 3.5 games up in the NL East. It was Cespedes’s first homer as a Met, and he says it’s all about his neon tribute to a little avian gatecrasher.

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Mets OF Yoenis Cespedes and 3B Juan Uribe drove in two of the team’s three runs Wednesday night, possibly with the help of a rally parakeet, leading to a win over the Rockies.

Cespedes, wearing a neon yellow sleeve on his left arm that matched the same color as the neon yellow parakeet that flew into Citi Field during the game, hit his first home run since being acquired by the Mets.

“I just used it because I know there was a bird at the field and I just wanted to look like the bird and hope it gives me some luck,” Cespedes said after the game.

Uribe, who went 2 for 3 with an RBI, was first to greet Cespedes as he crossed the plate, hugging him before he went into the dugout.

“Uribe has two World Series rings, he’s made a ton of money, but he plays the game right and that’s what makes the difference in the clubhouse,” manager Terry Collins said of Uribe’s veteran leadership.

The Mets acquired Uribe and Kelly Johnson on July 24 and Cespedes a week later. They are 5-2 with both of them in the starting lineup and 9-2 since trading for Cespedes.

“I don’t care what I’m doing,” Uribe said, when asked about playing time and his role on the team, talking to reporters in a parakeet-yellow t-shirt. “I’m trying to help the team.”

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Today, Denyse Santoro, an owner of the East Village wine bar & tapas restaurant Ballaró, sent an email to its neighbors explaining why they woke up on Monday morning to find “WE DO NOT PLAY TAYLOR SWIFT HERE YOU CUNTS GRAZIE” scrawled in chalk on the sidewalk outside the bar.

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Good news for anyone who’s ever wanted to live in the realm of Gondor from J.R.R. Tolkien’s Lord of the Rings series:

You’re a nerrrd.

A team of architects and structural engineers who are also gigantic nerrrds are endeavoring to build the city of Minas Tirith, for realsies. A life-sized, thousand-foot castle, complete with residential and commercial space that you can rent or buy, in an as-of-yet undisclosed location in Southern England.

Starting your own city isn’t cheap, and the folks at Realize Minas Tirith have set the goal on their Indiegogo campaign at $2.9 billion (U.S.). So far, they’ve raised $390. The city’s budget breaks down like this:

• $2.1 billion for building materials
• $23 million for land
• $290 million for labor
• $487 million for rescue services after an avalanche of pussy descends on you when you tell people you’ve got a penthouse at the top of the White City

Or, you know. Actually, they’re going to use the remaining $450 million or so to run the city until an estimated 2053. That is, presumably, if you want to spend any money getting this city built. The rewards packages really vary, here:

• $25 — Your name on a memorial in the city!
• $40 — Free tour of the city!
• $80 — A nameplate somewhere in the city!

Then it really jumps up a notch:

• $780 — A free night’s stay in the city!
• $78,000 — A street named after you! In the city!
• $623,000 — A two bedroom apartment on the lowest level!
• $2.7 million — The penthouse!

I mean, actually, less than $3 million for the penthouse suite in the City of Kings is still cheaper than a house in Malibu. They don’t talk specifics here, but, for that price, I assume you get to be the Steward of Gondor and burn people alive as often as you want.

The campaign has 50 days left and will thankfully not be keeping any of the money earned if they don’t reach their goal, because, if there was one easy way to grab cash from dorks, it’d be to claim you’re going to build a big castle somewhere for them to play wizards and orcs in and then just not do that at all.

via Gizmag

By Robert Niles: The Disneyland Resort today introduced a new version of its official app, which is now available via the Apple App Store for iPhones and iPads and the Google Play store for Android devices.

The new Disneyland app allows visitors to buy tickets and use their phone for admission to the park. The app also includes current attraction wait times and maps showing rides, shows, shops, character meet and greets, restrooms, and PhotoPass locations throughout Disneyland, Disney California Adventure, and the Downtown Disney district. You can zoom in or out on the maps, and the app can access your current location, allowing you to see what is nearby when you are in the park.

You can browse listed locations via maps or a list, toggling between the two using the icon at the bottom right corner of the screen.

The Mickey head logo takes you to the page where you can access park hours, as well as buying or displaying your ticket. I logged in using my existing Disneyland.com account, and the app instantly brought up my account information, including a barcode for my annual pass, which I could have scanned for admission to the parks.

Unfortunately, annual passholders cannot use the app to get Fastpasses or their AP discounts at restaurants and shops within the resort. Disneyland's Fastpass machines and many registers are not equipped to read the ticket barcode on the app, nor does the app seem to incorporate its phone's NFC tag capabilities, which allows you to "tap and pay" using other apps at other retailers. AP holders will need to bring their regular passes to the park for Fastpasses and discounts.

Day and resort guests who use the app for park entry will get traditional paper tickets at the front gate, which they can use to get Fastpasses inside the parks. If you want to use the app to make a restaurant reservation, just drill down to the restaurant's location in the app, then click the "Find a Table" link, which will open your phone's Web browser and launch the Disneyland.com website page for making a reservation.

While the app seemed easy enough to use on my WiFi connection at home, the real test will be in trying to use the app in the Disneyland parks, where there is no free public WiFi system and cellular data connections can be slow or impossible to access during busy periods. As much as I like Disneyland's new app, I would love a big, new Disneyland Resort in-park free public WiFi network even more.

This article originally appeared at http://www.themeparkinsider.com/flume/201508/4677/. All rights reserved. If you are not reading this on a personal RSS reader (such as Feedburner) or on http://www.themeparkinsider.com, you are reading a scraper website that has illegally copied and stolen http://www.themeparkinsider.com's content. Please visit http://www.themeparkinsider.com/flume/201508/4677/ for the original version, along with all its comments.

By Robert Niles: With crowds filling queues at the Disneyland Resort (and other theme parks around the world), many frequent theme park visitors use this time of year to skip the most popular rides and choose instead to enjoy some of their favorite parks' other delights.

In my Orange County Register column this week, I write about 10 favorite snacks and treats at the Disneyland Resort, then offer five suggestions for treats from other Disney parks around the world that I would love to see Disney bring to Anaheim.

At the end of the column, I ask readers to offer their picks for favorite theme park snacks, not just at Disneyland, but from other parks as well. So I'll make the same offer to you — what are your favorite theme park snacks? Ideally, we're looking for snacks that are unique to specific park or chain, as opposed to a treat you can find anywhere. Tell us you picks in the comments, and I'll feature the most popular ones in a future Register column.

This article originally appeared at http://www.themeparkinsider.com/flume/201508/4676/. All rights reserved. If you are not reading this on a personal RSS reader (such as Feedburner) or on http://www.themeparkinsider.com, you are reading a scraper website that has illegally copied and stolen http://www.themeparkinsider.com's content. Please visit http://www.themeparkinsider.com/flume/201508/4676/ for the original version, along with all its comments.

In June, Game of Thrones once again broke our damn hearts by — spoiler coming, but you should know by now, damn it — seemingly killing fan-favorite know-nothing Jon Snow. Of course, we’re still in our denial and bargaining stages of grief, so we’re doubtful of anything Kit Harington and Maisie Williams have said about the character being genuinely dead, and we lost our damn minds when Harington was spotted growing his Jon Snow hair back and taking a flight to Belfast where Game of Thrones is currently filming.

Now another tidbit is getting our hopes up for a Jon Snow comeback. As Pedestrian reports, HBO sent out an email promoting their “Honour The Fallen: The Memoriam Collection” toys. The toy sale included several now-dead characters, including (spoilers ahead) Joffrey, The Hound, and Oberyn Martell. Noticeably absent from the Memoriam Collection was Jon Snow, presumably because all the Jon Snow toys are locked in a Schrödinger’s Box with Ser Pounce. HBO is just gleefully f*cking with us now.

Don’t you break our hearts again, HBO.

(Via Pedestrian)

During a report on Amazon passing Walmart in sales, a local news team found themselves right in the middle of conspiracy alley. At least one of them did, our very patient newswoman just managed to look on and shake her head while her co-host rambled on about his friend who worked at Amazon.

Sure the sale of sex toys and marital aids might give Amazon a slight edge over Walmart, but that can’t be the main reason. My guess is we’ll just have to wait for his on the spot, eyewitness report as he goes undercover to tear the rug out from under Amazon’s disgusting sex toy ring.

Or something like that. It’ll give time for his co-host to out and have a smoke or two before she can get back to work.

(Via 2 News / RandomFandom)

And for more on the sales battle between Walmart and Amazon, check out…

Mets fans looking to deliver the Wilpons another type of bailout can do it through a newly created GoFundMe account. Die-hard Mets fan Etan Bednarsh setup a page entitled “Let’s...

Bill Cosby’s deposition in a 2005 sexual assault lawsuit against him, recently unsealed over Cosby’s objections, reveals the comedian made arrangements with a New York modeling agency back in the ‘80s to set up dinners in his dressing room with young, struggling models from outside New York. At least one of the women who dined with Cosby later accused him of pressuring her into sex.http://deadspin.com/here-are-the-d...

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Los Angeles-based animator Leigh Lahav has created “Too Many Marvel Movies,” an amusing animated short where a group of fangirls get fed up with how many Marvel superhero movies there are. They quickly realize that there is nothing they can do to escape the clutches of the growing Marvel Cinematic Universe. Fans of the clever Leigh can help support her future animated videos on Patreon.

Are there too many Marvel movies? With the release of ‘Avengers 2′, ‘Ant-Man’, and countless other superhero news, the fangirls certainly feel they’ve had enough.

The minor league State College (Pa.) Spikes have issued a public apology for whatever orgiastic former Tiger Beat-er Corey Feldman did after their baseball game Sunday night. In a solemn official statement, they thanked fans for their support during this very Corey time for the organization.

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With Paul Rudd joining the machine that is Marvel with Ant-Man on Friday, the idea that he might NOT show a clip from the film during his appearance on Conan seems a little crazy. I mean this is Marvel backed by Disney, with millions of dollars poured into promoting the film in the way that they seem fit. Joe Hollywood actor isn’t going to just stroll into late night and change that because he’s got a streak to keep alive.

Unless he gets creative…which he did.

Rudd still got a chance to show the clip from Mac And Me — not really a spoiler at this point, but still just as funny — and he got away with it by having a little creative fun with his latest role in the Marvel Universe. It is certainly one to add to the supercut that was floating around a couple of years ago, and possibly the greatest one of them all until Rudd is up for an Oscar and still decides to do it.

(Via Team Coco)

Kirk Cameron, God’s chosen actor, knows that the heavenly father is real because no one’s ever seen a half-crocodile, half-duck called a Crocoduck , though that is most likely because Kirk Cameron made it up. But what if the Crocoduck were real, and what if it put its foot-long Crockoduck penis in Kirk Cameron’s willing mouth? That’s the premise of an erotic novella that you can buy for a buck on Amazon.

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Siri, the tiny robot that lives in your phone and has better jokes than you do, is once again showing its human side: she has made sure that anyone asking her about Bruce Jenner is reminded that Caitlyn Jenner only goes by that name now. And that’s pretty awesome.

BuzzFeed reports that this update was discovered when someone tested Siri by asking it about Jenner’s height and real name. Here’s what the electronic assistant sent back:

And that’s not all: Buzzfeed asked Siri what “gender Bruce Jenner is” and the response was “female.” Sure, it’s not the ideal “Caitlyn Jenner is female” some of us might be hoping for, but it’s great that Apple is doing its part to respect Jenner’s pronouns and educate the public about Caitlyn’s transition. Now if only Siri could learn how to say it loves me back, this program would be perfect.

(Via Buzzfeed)

The next time Anthony Bourdain’s in Las Vegas, he’s probably not eating at Guy Fieri’s Vegas Kitchen & Bar. The outspoken chef/friend-of-Uproxx was in Atlanta this weekend as part of his Close to the Bone stand-up tour, and most of his material apparently involves mocking Adam Richman and Guy Fieri. “And what’s the deal with frosted tips?” he never said, but should have.

“The minute that you become a father, certain truths become immediately obvious to you. The first second you see your daughter’s head corkscrew out of the womb and open her eyes, they are pretty much saying ‘Lose the Ramones shirt.’

So I’ve made some adjustments in my life. So I sort of feel in a heartfelt way for Guy [Fieri]. I wonder about him. He’s 52 years old and still rolling around in the flame outfit… What does he do? How does Guy Fieri de-douche?” (Via Atlanta Magazine)

And on Richman:

“Why did we watch [Man vs. Food]? Admit it. You wanted him to die.” Bourdain added that during his travels, he noticed that the show was popular in countries like Yemen, Iran, Libya, and Afghanistan. “The show confirms their worst suspicions—that Americans are fat, lazy, slothful, [and] wasteful.” Bourdain then imagined a poor goat herder in the mountains of Afghanistan sitting in front of an old television after a long, hard days work and watching Richman choking on more animal protein than the farmer’s family would ever see in years. “I know what he’s thinking, ‘America is a terrible place. I want to join ISIS.’” (Via Atlanta Magazine)

The one Food Network personality Bourdain is fine with? Ina Garten, who’s “one of the few people on [the network] who can actually cook.”

SOMEONE’s never had Fieri’s Guy-talian Nachos with extra donkey sauce.

(Via Atlanta Magazine)

And for anything else you may have missed on the web today…