Shared posts

12 May 00:47

Damian Lewis As Antony: “Friends, Romans, countrymen…” (2:32)

by Endswell

To mark the 400th anniversary of Shakespeare’s death, The Guardian asked leading actors to perform key speeches from his plays. Here is Damian Lewis as Antony in Shakespeare’s Julius Caesar.

The Guardian

20 Apr 01:21

The Next Rembrandt

by Endswell

Microsoft and the Rembrandt House Museum have combined forces to create the next painting “by” the great Dutch painter.

We now had a digital file true to Rembrandt’s style in content, shapes, and lighting. But paintings aren’t just 2D — they have a remarkable three-dimensionality that comes from brushstrokes and layers of paint. To recreate this texture, we had to study 3D scans of Rembrandt’s paintings and analyze the intricate layers on top of the canvas.

The Next Rembrandt via Kottke

30 Mar 03:06

Scott Sterling Returns to Sports

by Endswell
Jono Lee

Laughed pretty hard at this.

Scott Sterling brings his ball magnet of a face to volleyball.

Studio C via r/videos

18 Mar 04:25

Things I Believe To Be True About Men Named Jonathan

by Mallory Ortberg
  • You are a fool if you believe there is more than one man named Jonathan. There is one Jonathan living at the earth's core, with many appendages.
  • Jason Schwartzman is not named Jonathan, but he is a Jonathan; you know this to be true

Read more Things I Believe To Be True About Men Named Jonathan at The Toast.

14 Mar 01:24

Atlas Talked

by Endswell

Boston Dynamics’ Atlas Robot gets the voice module it so desperately needs.

Mr. King

14 Mar 01:21

Dirtbag Jason and the Argonauts

by Mallory Ortberg

HYPSIPYLE: welcome to Lemnos
you will find there are no men here
as we have murdered all our husbands

JASON: niiiice

HYPSIPYLE: you see, we neglected our worship of Aphrodite and as punish – what?

JASON: aw yeah I like a challenge

HYPSIPYLE: you misunderstand
this place is cursed

Read more Dirtbag Jason and the Argonauts at The Toast.

01 Mar 10:27

Grumpy Hermits I Would Like To Cuddle In Art History

by Mallory Ortberg
Jono Lee

This is probably her weirdest ever art history post.

father

C'MERE YOU GRUMPY OLD SAINT
no
C'MERE AND LEMME CUDDLE YOUR FACE
no i came to the desert to be alone
IF I DON'T GET TO CUDDLE YOUR SCRUMPED-UP LITTLE OLD MAD FACE IN THE NEXT FOURTEEN SECONDS I MIGHT DIE

Read more Grumpy Hermits I Would Like To Cuddle In Art History at The Toast.

28 Feb 21:27

Guy in a Dinosaur Costume Rides a Horse Performing Tricks

by Endswell
Jono Lee

Please watch immediately.

Don’t even pretend you need any further explanation to watch this.

Gascon Horsemanship via Laughing Squid

29 Jan 16:57

Yet More Dogs I Would Like To Own In Art, Even Though They Are Probably Dead Now

by Mallory Ortberg

dogs1

CAST ASIDE YOUR WIG-HAIRS AND CUFF-CANES, GENTLEMEN, AND ASSEMBLE UP FOR ME THIS PUDDLE OF DOG-RIBBONS POSTE OF HASTEWARDLY

Read more Yet More Dogs I Would Like To Own In Art, Even Though They Are Probably Dead Now at The Toast.

18 Dec 00:24

Yohan Kim: Michael Jackson – Bad (Piano Cover)

by Endswell

13-year-old Yohan Kim’s piano cover of Michael Jackson’s “Bad” goes from good to great.

Yohan Kim

19 Nov 07:17

That One Scene From Conan The Barbarian Everyone Knows, As Written By Me

by Mallory Ortberg

GENERAL: Conan! What is best in life?
CONAN: Never getting yelled at, even once! Never getting yelled at, even if it means never speaking to someone again, or stifling your own feelings, as long as it means that getting yelled at literally never happens.
GENERAL: That is good! That is good.

Read more That One Scene From Conan The Barbarian Everyone Knows, As Written By Me at The Toast.

28 Oct 03:07

Try Not To Laugh Challenge: 10-27-2015

by Endswell
Jono Lee

Links to highlights so you don't have to watch the whole thing.

https://youtu.be/W3_LQaUHCrA

https://youtu.be/X0hCRPO3hjY

https://youtu.be/oeb5LdAyLC8

A compilation of this Reddit thread.

Teri Z

14 Oct 23:10

Pogo – Hoo Ba Ba Kanda

by Endswell

Nick “Pogo” Bertke (previously) gives nut bag televangelist Robert Tilton a musical remix.

Pogo

14 Oct 16:43

Texts From Francisco Goya

by Mallory Ortberg
Jono Lee

Fuck yeah Black Paintings 5eva

ive completed my latest work
oh, have you?
where will you present it?
i'm going to hang it in my kitchen
so everyone who comes to the house for a meal can see it while they eat

how innovative

Read more Texts From Francisco Goya at The Toast.

09 Oct 00:18

Watch These Little Football Players Whip/Nae Nae Mid-Game

by Endswell

The Mighty Mites of Milford, Massachusetts turn their scrimmage during halftime of a high school varsity game into a dance party.

Laure Farrell via The Daily Dot

07 Oct 06:24

Two Monks Discover How Tall Women And Horses Are

by Mallory Ortberg

MONK #1: what's inside of a dog
MONK #2: hmm?
MONK #1: like how would I draw a dog, and what it's made of
MONK #2: oh oh gotcha
red strings and nothing

monk12

 

MONK #1: okay so I know that knights and horses go together
like in wartime
MONK #2: right
MONK #1: but how is that arranged, exactly
like how does it look when they go into battle
MONK #2: oh that's easy
the knight stands perfectly still and the horse bumps him with its nose from behind
MONK #1: really?
MONK #2: yeah
MONK #1: seems like it would make more sense for the knight to ride on the horse
or at least for them to both walk side by side
MONK #2: yeah i mean
it takes forever but who are we to judge

monk14

Read more Two Monks Discover How Tall Women And Horses Are at The Toast.

12 Aug 00:22

Anderson Silva defense: 'Sexual performance' medication tainted drug test

by Marc Raimondi
Jono Lee

Ah, the old boner drugs defence.

Part of Anderson Silva's defense in a steroid case with the Nevada Athletic Commission (NAC) will be that his use of "sexual performance" medication tainted his drug test result.

Silva will go before the NAC for a disciplinary hearing Thursday following multiple failed tests -- in and out of competition -- for performance-enhancing drugs in January. The former UFC middleweight champion is denying he knowingly took any kind of steroids, but part of his defense will be that sexual performance medication and another supplement contaminated the test results, according to the answer to the NAC complaint obtained Tuesday by MMAFighting.com.

Combate was the first to report the information.

"The Spider" tested positive for drostanolone metabolites twice -- once the day of his Jan. 31 fight against Nick Diaz and in an out-of-competition, Jan. 9 test. Silva also tested positive for androstane, another banned substance, in the random, pre-fight test.

Silva's lawyer Michael Alonso writes in the answer that Silva was "administering or using a supplement for the purpose of enhancing sexual performance and testing of the supplement revealed that the supplement was contaminated with an Exogenous Anabolic Agent: Drostanolone metabolite."

Alonso also wrote that another supplement Silva was taking could have contained androstane.

Silva's defense against the NAC will also contain inconsistencies in drug tests, including two tests -- one pre-fight and one post-fight -- that Silva passed. The NAC did not include in its initial complaint the post-fight test that Silva had passed, according to the answer to the complaint.

Silva also tested positive for temazepam and oxazepam, which are classified as benzodiazepines and not prohibited for in-competition use by the NAC unless there is an exemption given. The commission alleges also that Silva did not inform it about any such supplements in a pre-fight questionnaire.

Alonso writes that the NAC has failed to provide sufficient facts with regards to that part of the claim. Temazepam is commonly used as a sleep aid, while oxazepam is an anti-anxiety medication.

Silva's defense team is asking that the NAC take no disciplinary action against Silva, including any kind of fine or suspension. Silva's team is also asking for the NAC not to overturn the fight result to a no contest. Silva beat Diaz via unanimous decision.

Silva is currently under temporary suspension pending the results of this disciplinary hearing.

Silva, 40, is regarded as the best pound-for-pound fighter in UFC history. He defended the middleweight title 10 times and won 16 straight fights in the organization, both records.

The fight against Diaz was his first in 13 months following a gruesome broken leg he sustained while fighting Chris Weidman in December 2013.

30 Jul 03:57

Ronda Rousey to Bethe Correia: ‘You’re not meant for this life’

by Shaun Al-Shatti
Jono Lee

Jo, Rousey referencing Ender's Game to explain why she's going to beat Correia really, really bad.

Ronda Rousey isn't buying what Bethe Correia is selling.

Rousey puts her UFC women's bantamweight title on the line against Correia this Saturday in the main event of UFC 190, and Las Vegas oddsmakers have already made Rousey a whopping 17-to-1 favorite in some sports books. If that number holds up, it'll stand as the biggest and most lopsided line in UFC history. Add in the fact that it's a title fight in the challenger's own backyard, and suffice to say the pressure carried on Rousey's shoulders is enormous.

But that's just the way she likes it.

"This definitely is the most personal fight that I've ever been in and it's the most pressure that I've ever been under, and that's another reason why Bethe is just never meant to be the champion," Rousey said at UFC 190's open workouts. "Because she said that, ‘oh, I have no pressure on me, no one expects anything out of me, so that's an advantage.'

"So you're saying that you do the best with less pressure? Like, that's what's best for you? You're not meant for this life. You're not. I do the best the more pressure there is. I fight above myself. I've never been under more pressure in my life, and I'm going to show the world what I'm really made of."

Rousey hasn't made a secret of her disdain for Correia. While the pair's rivalry may have started out friendly enough, it took a turn in May when Correia told Brazilian media that she hoped Rousey didn't commit suicide after losing her UFC title.

Rousey's father committed suicide when Rousey was a young girl, and the tragedy was understandably one of the turning points of Rousey's life.

Since hearing Correia's comments, Rousey has repeatedly vowed to make an example of the undefeated Brazilian.

"I can't have girls taking the same approach as Bethe," Rousey reiterated Wednesday. "Ender's Game was one of my favorite books growing up, and one the messages I took (from the book) is when you beat somebody, you have to beat them so well and thoroughly that you beat them all of the future times. You have to win all of the future possible fights.

"So I have to beat this girl so thoroughly that there's not future girls who pick on my family in order to get a quicker title shot. Pick on me all you want, but leave them out of it. That's what I really want to accomplish."

Correia ultimately backtracked away from her comments, claiming that she was unaware of Rousey's father's suicide when she made her initial remarks.

Her mea culpa didn't exactly come with an apology though, as Correia said only, "I'm humble enough to ask [you] for forgiveness." And Rousey isn't willing to let that fact slide.

"I don't believe her at all," Rousey said. "How could you know that many more obscure facts about my life and not know about that? I don't know if I'm more insulted by what she said or by her phony attempt to save face, because she never even apologized. That's the thing. She was just like, ‘I'm humble enough to ask for forgiveness.'

"You're complimenting yourself and you're asking for forgiveness without apologizing. And it's all a lie. So that's like A, B, and C of bulls**t, and I just don't have the capacity for bulls**t."

For better or worse, the incident ultimately became a driving narrative of UFC 190, and the fallout has done little to slow Correia's trash talk.

Correia captured Rousey's attention by defeating two of her training partners, Jessamyn Duke and Shayna Baszler, thereby forcing a rivalry with Rousey's Four Horsewomen group. The storyline took on a life of its own, which eventually led to Correia being granted her title shot. She has since continued to throw shots at Rousey nearly every chance she gets, even implying that Rousey is a one-trick pony who is fallible without her trademark armbars.

"The thing is, when you're trying to address someone who doesn't know what they're talking about, you have to keep in mind that they don't know what they're talking about," Rousey said. "My last five fights were all very different. It was a very different progression of events that happened in every single one, and it just kind of speaks to her ignorance.

"It's like watching boxing (and saying), ‘oh, well it always ends with a punch, so they always do the same thing.' Every single one of those armbars, the knockout with the knee, the knockout with the overhand right, they were all extremely different. If they all looked the same to you, that really shows how little you understand."

21 Jul 08:19

Megavalanche Glacier Carnage

by Endswell
Jono Lee

A bike race where everyone is eating shit, all the time.

Jamie Nicoll, a Polygon UR Team bike rider from New Zealand, captures GoPro footage of Megavalanche, a 3000 meter-high race down a glacier in the French Alps.

UR Team

17 Jul 17:42

Home Again

by Justin Boyd
Jono Lee

Jo.

Home Again

True comic. The computer was failing to get an IP address from the network several times a day for no apparent reason. My parent’s computer had The Real Problems™

–CON BRAVO–

I’m gonna be in Hamilton, Ontario in like a week for Con Bravo! Whoa! Are YOU gonna be there? Because I will be!

I’ll be doing a webcomic panel with I AM ARG (who is also a server pal/real pal) along with some other webcomic folks!



bonus panel
08 Jul 15:22

Sit-Ups

08 Jul 04:31

Fuck That: A Guided Meditation

by Endswell

Put some headphones on, close your eyes, and just “feel the fucking nonsense float away.”

Jason Headley

23 Jun 17:41

Photo



22 Jun 22:13

You’re Back

by Justin Boyd
Jono Lee

I have no idea why this is so funny to me.

You’re Back

The first four panels are 100% true. The last four panels aren’t true… yet. Because I can totally see myself doing that. Maybe not with dog vom, but certainly with something else.

-ALSO–

By the time you read this, I’ll be in Las Vegas doing things and melting into the pavement!

Also, the comic on Tuesday will be delayed to Wednesday due to me just getting back from Vegas Tuesday morning!



bonus panel
24 May 23:38

nevver: Outings Project

Jono Lee

I saw my favourite painting in the Musée d'Orsay on a wall in Paris, and now I know why!


facebook.com/outingsproject | outings-project.org | flickr.com/outingsproject


facebook.com/outingsproject | outings-project.org | flickr.com/outingsproject


facebook.com/outingsproject | outings-project.org | flickr.com/outingsproject


facebook.com/outingsproject | outings-project.org | flickr.com/outingsproject


facebook.com/outingsproject | outings-project.org | flickr.com/outingsproject


facebook.com/outingsproject | outings-project.org | flickr.com/outingsproject


facebook.com/outingsproject | outings-project.org | flickr.com/outingsproject


facebook.com/outingsproject | outings-project.org | flickr.com/outingsproject

nevver:

Outings Project

16 May 20:08

Cool Show

by Justin Boyd

Cool Show

That guy gave some major personal spoilers man. I would have never told anyone that, because all it takes is one hungry friend…

–TEAM FORTRESS 2, MAY 17th, 6 PM EDT–

Do you like Team Fortress 2? Awesome!

Do you like Buttersafe?  Oh. You do?

Well, that’s too bad, because on Sunday at 6PM Eastern, 3 PM Pacific, there will be an Invisible Bread vs Buttersafe Team Fortress 2 match and you’ll be shooting some Buttersafe fans right in their hitboxes.

I, of course, will be on team Buttersafe because their comic is pretty dang great.

GET THOSE INDEX FINGERS READY AND JOIN THIS STEAM GROUP FOR UPDATES



bonus panel
12 May 07:48

Remember Bruce Lee? He’s Back…In Kid Form.

by Endswell

5-year-old Ryu destroys the nunchaku scene from Game of Death.

Bruce Ryu via Reddit

22 Apr 20:08

chryswatchesgot: Chrys Watches GoT [x]











chryswatchesgot:

Chrys Watches GoT [x]

19 Apr 00:58

I made a thing.

12 Apr 17:26

Unknown

by Justin Boyd

Unknown

Avoid awkwardness at all costs!

The “I think I know them, but I don’t wanna be wrong” fear is strong with me.

–BARK–

I have approved the final proof for Invisible Bread Volume 3! I will be shipping it straight to Seattle for ECCC for it’s annual unveiling!



bonus panel