Shared posts

28 Apr 20:17

feathersescapism: lsleofskye: Food please Trickster is having...



Food please

Trickster is having a hard month.

28 Apr 19:30

24 Funny Wrong Number Texts

by Derek

One way to avoid being given the wrong number is to just ask for their address. Wait, no. [via ebaumsworld]                          

The post 24 Funny Wrong Number Texts appeared first on

28 Apr 18:59

Scott Baio's Feud Over Costar's Death Has Morphed Into an Argument About His Penis Size

by Ellie Shechet on The Slot, shared by Emma Carmichael to Jezebel

Well, isn't everything apparently about that with these guys?

Like a very large succulent plant, Scott Baio requires attention every once in a while—whether he’s telling liberal snowflakes to “grow the blank up” and quit with “all of your antics of Russia,” or coldly speculating that his former Happy Days costar Erin Moran died of a drug addiction and remembering her as an…


28 Apr 16:47

ICE really hates all your 'criminal space alien' prank calls. Good.

by (Gabe Ortiz)

"Won't you please think of the imaginary victims that we're creating in order to justify abusing certain groups of people, and especially sow discord among the populace, to make sure none of you are strong enough to effectively stop us?

There are so many things that are wrong with ICE’s VOICE office. It’s an anti-immigrant smear campaign thinly veiled as a “public safety office.” It has historical roots in Nazi Germany, where a similar campaign was launched against Jewish citizens. Yesterday, an immigration attorney discovered that babies were mistakenly included in VOICE’s “criminal immigrant” database, because ICE is fucking incompetent. So it’s no surprise, then, that outraged Americans pranked the office’s 1-855-48-VOICE (6423) hotline with calls about criminal space aliens, something ICE did not quite appreciate. In fact, according to Fusion, ICE “kind of lost their shit.”

“This is the email I got from an ICE official,” writes Fusion’s Rafi Schwartz, “when I asked the agency for comment on the prank calls (emphasis mine)”:

The VOICE line remains in operation. As yesterday was its first day I can’t give you any sense of whether this group had any impact at all on wait times or call volume because there’s no prior data to compare.

I hope you won’t dignify this group with the attention they are seeking. But if you choose to do so...this group’s cheap publicity stunt is beyond the pale of legitimate public discourse. Their actions seek to obstruct and do harm to crime victims; that’s objectively despicable regardless of one’s views on immigration policy.

The VOICE Office provides information to citizens and non-citizens alike regardless of status, race, etc., whose loved ones have been killed or injured by removable aliens. VOICE provides access to the same information you and other reporters are already able to obtain. Yet this group claims it’s somehow racist to give the same to victims of all races and nationalities? That is absurd.

Further, openly obstructing and mocking victims crosses the line of legitimate public discourse. VOICE is a line for victims to obtain information. This group’s stunt is designed to harm victims. That is shameful.

What is “shameful,” “absurd,” and “despicable” is trotting out a “cheap publicity stunt” like VOICE and pretending to care about “victims” while simultaneously trying to strong-arm local law enforcement agencies over sanctuary cities and driving so much fear in immigrant communities over deportations that they are no longer reporting when they’ve been victims of domestic violence and sexual assault. Oh, Donald Trump cares about victims alright—if they’re white.

28 Apr 15:50

hooligan-nova: The fascists use “joking” as a litmus test. They tell a shitty bigoted joke and if...


The fascists use “joking” as a litmus test.

They tell a shitty bigoted joke and if the reaction is bad they’re “just joking”.

But if they are reaffirmed it is no longer a joke and they’ll feel comfortable openly and sincerely discussing what would have been “just a joke” otherwise.

28 Apr 15:47

Actually genuinenly enjoying my customer service job sometimes



Customer (calling from Ireland): “Yes hello, I would like to -”

Sheep in the background: *gentle baa*

Customer: “Uh, sorry, what I want to do is -”

Sheep: *slightly more insistent baa*

Customer: “No, not now! -cough- Excuse me. I have a reservation and -”


Customer: Arnulf! Please be quiet, I am on the phone! … Sorry, I sincerely apologize on behalf of Arnulf.”

me: “I love and forgive him.”

Customer: “Don’t, he doesn’t deserve it. Anyway, I’m calling about -”

Arnulf: *small, very self-satisfied baa*

I once took my kids to a local farm and we found a lil goat with its horns stuck in a fence, just sitting there kinda mournfully on the grass. We tried to help it get free but it was stuck tight. We petted it for a while and fed it some grass (as it had lawnmowered a circle around itself as far as it could reach), and then went back to the ticket office to tell them it needed help, but before I’d said more than: “There’s a goat-” the guy cut me off with a weary wave and said, “Yeah, we know. Stuck in the fence. That’s Brenda. She can get herself out whenever she wants. She just likes the attention.” 

Trolled by a fucking goat. 

28 Apr 15:40

10+ Baby Elephants That Will Instantly Make You Smile

by Inga Ko

Bored Panda knows what I like

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28 Apr 14:59

Tumblr Gets Deep (21 Pics)

by Jeff Wysaski

Tumblr asks the important questions… reblog it reblog it reblog it reblog it reblog it reblog it reblog it reblog it reblog it reblog it reblog it reblog it reblog it reblog it reblog it reblog it reblog it reblog it reblog it reblog it reblog it Tumblr Gets Deep: Next Page–>

The post Tumblr Gets Deep (21 Pics) appeared first on

28 Apr 14:36

fozmeadows: tessacrowley: lily-peet: nevertrustamanwho: femme...


Wow, after losing Dick Swett, NH is really working hard at making itself a joke again.









A New Hampshire Republican State Representative anonymously created the “Red Pill” subreddit.


these aren’t just bullshitter dweebs in their mom’s basements trolling the internet, these are men who formulate the way we implement laws and who govern the way we live our lives.

^^^ Hello, yes, everyone needs to see this. It’s not always a bunch of nobodies trolling around on 4chan. It’s, doctors, lawyers, judges, businessmen, bankers, law enforcement, etc. People who have pulls on society. They literally don’t see other groups besides themselves as human or equal

…holy shit like this is bad really really bad but so much clearly so if you’ve ever read the scum that floats to the top of the Red Pill. Like basically he was just outed as the creator of a neo-nazi misogynist pro-rape forum explicitly to recruit online loners and groom them like it’s EVERYTHING we’ve been saying these people do but this is like, the hive.

For the anon asking why not trust red pill guys

Fuck Conservatives

Fun fact: the Red Pill was 90% of the reason I left reddit. I think it’s important everyone understands why, without having to subject yourselves to actually looking at the subreddit.

The Red Pill is a confluence of gross misogyny, rape culture, and vile social darwinism, all tied up under the banner of it being the “truth” behind some grand lie that is PC culture; that is to say, taking the red pill to withdraw yourself from the Matrix, a metaphor nearly as dated as the ideals they espouse.

If you think I’m exaggerating, I’m not. I spent nearly two years on reddit before toxic bullshit like this drove me out. These people build an elaborate construct about treating women like property and sexualizing children because ~evolution~ programmed them to like it, and ~evolution~ can’t possibly be wrong, as though club-wielding Neanderthal brutes are something to aspire to and not something we left behind millennia ago.

They’ve created an incredibly detailed fantasy about how women are evolutionarily predisposed to react to certain behaviors of “alpha males” (another false equivalence; the theory of the alpha male comes from a since-disproved theory about wolf behavior), and how the trick to success in sex is about taking on these characteristics which, spoiler alert, explicitly encourage treating women like garbage.

I cannot overstate how incredibly toxic the Red Pill is and how disgustingly large the community became by the time I left reddit. I wish I could say I was surprised that a Republican senator founded it, but this is the kind of shit they’ve been legislating for years.

28 Apr 14:30

the-movemnt: Trump started an anti-immigrant hotline. People...


Has anyone reported Melania yet?


Trump started an anti-immigrant hotline. People are trolling it with tales of aliens.

  • On Wednesday, Trump administration launched the Victims of Immigrant Crime Engagement Office
  • With the launch of VOICE also came the opening of VOICE’s official hotline, which fields calls from those who allege they are the victim of a crime carried out by a immigrant.
  • According to BuzzFeed, since the hotline’s launch, the phone lines have been tied up with calls about undocumented aliens — from outer space.
  • Given that the launch of the hotline coincided with Alien Day, people put two and two together and launched a plan to inundate the hotline with stories of alien abductions. Read more (4/27/17 10 AM)

follow @the-movemnt

I love how activists are fucking with this supremely racist idea.

Don’t forget that the Nazis set up similar programs encouraging people to report alleged crimes by Jews.

Trump is a fucking racist and a vulgar affront to everything that is good about America.

28 Apr 14:22

captn-sara-holmes: My class 10/10 lost the plot today. I don’t even know where to start or how to...


My class 10/10 lost the plot today. I don’t even know where to start or how to explain to their parents that I think they’ve all turned into tiny little rebels.

9:10 - we are studying a report about Chernobyl in guided reading. Several are looking at me gone out when I explain that nuclear power can be dangerous. “So why use it?” one asks. Why indeed.
9:12 - we are now discussing renewable energy. Several more express outrage and ask why the country doesn’t have to use renewable energy. Several more state that we should avoid pollution because it kills polar bears and stuff right, Miss?
9:13 - I mention that it’s a complicated issue because of different viewpoints, and that certain people, say Drumpf, don’t believe in climate change.
9:14 - chaos.
9:15 - small child suggests someone murder Drumpf. I say that murder is both bad and illegal.
9:16 - the class have learned the word impeach and are shouting IMPEACH TRUMP IMPEACH TRUMP IMPEACH TRUMP while banging on the tables.
9:17 - headteacher comes in to see what is going on. Small child tells him quite angrily that SOME PEOPLE JUST DECIDE TO NOT BELIEVE IN SCIENCE WHICH YOU CAN’T DO BECAUSE IT’S SCIENCE. He backs out of the room quite quickly.
9:25 -I have abandoned plans for grammar and the children are now writing persuasive pieces about Why We Should Use Renewable Energy.

The saga continued after lunch when we continued our WW2 topic work, learning about the holocaust.

1:35 - we are discussing Kristalnacht. The class are collectively outraged and appalled. One is in tears.
1:40 - “Miss, I fucking hate Hitler.” that’s okay, but please express your hatred of fascism without the F word or I’ll have to ring your Mum again.
2:00 - small child who suggested murder earlier says “isn’t this exactly what Drumpf tried to do to the Muslims?” There’s a heady mix of realisation and outrage in the room.
2:13 - “Racism makes no sense” says a child, looking quite confused.
2:33 - “Hitler would have killed me because I’ve got cerebral palsy, right?” says a boy. He is tackle-hugged by a girl from across the table. I have to pretend I’m not crying.
2:34 - The rest of his table have made a pact to never let anyone hurt him. I am still pretending to be super chill. I am obviously failing as another child offers me a hug.
2:37 - I ask the children to look at nine examples of things the nazis did against Jewish people, and then arrange them in a diamond with what they consider the worst at the top.
2:38 - Mutiny. They all collectively decide to arrange all nine cards in a line and say that they’re all awful things so they all go at the top.
2:39 - I tell them if they kind find a way to fit a line of all nine in their books then fair enough. Smart child suggests a circle. Everyone cheers. We have a break, and they go outside raging about Hitler, Drumpf, racism, prejudice and injustice in general. I am handed a very strong tea by my TA who congratulates me on my gang of angry eleven year olds.

Faith in humanity both challenged and restored. Bring on tomorrow.

28 Apr 14:10

lettersforrainstorms:No amount of self care is going to make me...


No amount of self care is going to make me neurotypical

28 Apr 13:51

Trump on presidenting: 'I thought it would be easier.'

by (Mark Sumner)

We need to be actively working on ousting Pence, like NOW.

Donald Trump had North Korea all figured out … until Chinese President Xi Jinping gave him a ten minute lesson in the history of the region. Trump was ready to destroy NAFTA … until Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau gave him a ten minute talk on the damage such a move would generate for the regional economy. Thanks to other world leaders stepping up to take Trump’s tiny hand and guide him forward in baby steps, the world has so far avoided irreversible disaster. But all this learning and not just doing the first thing that comes to mind … it’s all so hard.

President Donald Trump on Thursday reflected on his first 100 days in office with a wistful look at his life before the White House.

"I loved my previous life. I had so many things going," Trump told Reuters in an interview. "This is more work than in my previous life. I thought it would be easier."

Trump isn’t getting to sleep until noon. He never gets to go on the radio and brag about the women he’s assaulted. And while there’s good money in strong-arming foreign governments to give him things, it’s just way slower than duping a bunch of investors into paying for some never-to-be-built condos. Seriously, this job is a drag.

He misses driving, feels as if he is in a cocoon, and is surprised how hard his new job is.

Since Trump’s election, a lot of effort has gone into pouring over the 25th Amendment, and Reuter’s fresh Trump interview demonstrates just how badly it’s needed. But maybe those never-used paragraphs won’t be needed. Because Trump could just follow one of his heroes. Richard Nixon has already demonstrated that the president can simply leave.

28 Apr 01:35


28 Apr 00:26

lynati: unlucky-artist: new running gag they started towards...



new running gag they started towards the end of the season where they like.. start slapping each other out of frustration… 

What great set of reaction gifs to use in 2017.

28 Apr 00:21

How to deal with street cats


OK, but the cats come up to me and demand I take them in? I am not lying, I am not exaggerating, the cats come to me and announce that I will have to take care of them. It has been observed.



  1. Be nice to them. They’re doing an important job. Do not chase them, grab them or harass them. 
  2. Always bring some food with you, it’s just polite. 
  3. Approach them slowly, and let them come to you. Sometimes you might have to sit on the ground and tap it a few times. This is what you brought food for. 
  4. At some point after you have managed to touch the cat it will turn and sprint away. This is when you start following it.
  5. Cats do not want you to get lost, but they can be fast. Never lose sight of them, you should stay with it until your return. This might still look like your usual street but you are in a liminal space already. Try not to get lost. 

(NOTE: do not follow cats with mismatched eyes. You can pet them, but the moment they run away you should immediately turn your back to them and walk in the opposite direction.)

Black cats:

  1. Follow black cats into the floor-level vents. Don’t worry, there are many spider webs but there aren’t any spiders.
  2. Do not lose sight of them in the dark.
  3. When you emerge, you will be in the same street you were before, but there will be no people to be found.
  4. Do not stray, follow your cat. Sometimes it might want to just catch a bird and go back. Do not stay longer just to explore.
  5.  If you hear the sound of a crowd in the distance do not try to follow it. Your cat will never lead you there.
  6. You can take anything with you but you cannot take pictures or record video or sound.

Orange cats:

  1. Orange cats hang around train stations for a reason. Follow them into the next train. You will not need a ticket.
  2. If the cat wants you to scratch its ears during the trip, do it.
  3. The landscape will not look like the area around your town.  Do not panic - this is normal.
  4. The people in the train will not speak a language you understand or recognize, but they will have clothes and devices similar to yours. They are usually nice.
  5. Get down at the same stop as your cat. You will not understand the name of the station, and no one will get off in the same station as yours. You should follow your cat, but it will never leave the station. Follow it into the next train to get back home.
  6. Never stay in the train. Never wait for the last stop.

White cats:

  1. White cats live on the edges. They will take you to many places but at the same time they will never take you anywhere.
  2. If you meet them during the night-time, the sun will start rising, regardless of the time. If you meet them during the daytime, the sun will start setting. It will stay like this for the duration of the trip.
  3. Follow them to the edge of a forest that smells like honeysuckle. You will hear the song of birds and the flow of water. You should never stray and enter the forest on your own. Your cat will not follow.
  4. Follow them to a building where a fancy party is being held at. Through the windows you can see the food and the champagne. The guests will ask you to join them, but your cat will keep walking. Do not accept the invitation, and never eat the food or drink the champagne.
  5. Follow them along the edge of a swimming pool. People will be bathing, playing and laughing. It will be hot, regardless of the season. Do not step too close to the edge, because they will try to grab your ankles and pull you into the water. Keep walking.
  6. Once the sun finally sets or rises you will be back home. Never enter your house until you are completely sure the sky is changing.

Calico cats:

  1. Calico cats are the safest. They will follow you instead.
  2. Walk around your town and you will see everything is the same, but you will not be able to make the connections between the streets.
  3. If you want to go to a certain place you will find it is no longer where it used to be.
  4. You will not recognize anyone. Every single person in the street will be a stranger. They are not dangerous but do not look them directly in the eyes.
  5. Never try to find your house. Because you will find it.
  6. When you want to come back take the cat back where you found it. This might be more difficult than you expect.

Remember to always take some food with you, something make of iron, and comfortable shoes.

And remember to always be nice to the cats!

[if you like my writing consider buying me a coffee? your girl works night shifts ;u;] 
@senshi76 gave me the suggestion for this one!

I. Love. This. Incredible, 12/10, would read about liminal cat guides doing good jobs again. Except now I want this paired with a detailed post about how to interact with street and stray cats IRL. Cat rescue side of Tumblr, will you do the thing? Animal side of Tumblr? @why-animals-do-the-thing
28 Apr 00:17

shingeki-no-survivors: armeniangenocidehistory: Yepraksia...



Yepraksia Gevorgyan, 110

Armenian genocide: survivors recall events 100 years on

To this day, the quote I read in a survivors biography in 7th grade still haunts me. “Who does now remember the Armenians?” 

You know who said that? Hitler. Adolf Hitler, as a way to justify the Holocaust. Because the world turned a blind eye to the Armenian genocide, he thought the world would turn its back to the Holocaust.

The worst part is, he was right. America, Europe, the governments knew what was going on. And they ignored it. Now, more than ever, remember the Armenians. Remember the Cambodians, Rwandans, Jews. Never again means now.

28 Apr 00:16

prokopetz: Today’s aesthetic: wildly inappropriate scale...


star kitten is best kitten


Today’s aesthetic: wildly inappropriate scale factors on totally mundane images.

(Source of kitten.)

28 Apr 00:10

Incompetent ICE includes babies, toddlers in VOICE database of alleged immigrant criminals

by (Gabe Ortiz)

Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) was recently forced to abruptly halt the agency’s reports shaming sanctuary cities after only three weeks because they were filled with so many errors. Now in yet another ICE fuck-up, “a database the Trump administration said would help victims of crimes track the custody of suspected criminal immigrants mistakenly listed babies and other children”:

When alerted Wednesday evening, Department of Homeland Security officials said the release of children’s names was a lapse in policy. The agency is not supposed to release information on children in immigration custody, said Gillian M. Christensen, acting Homeland Security press secretary.

Well, guys, you totally just did. Among the identities revealed were those of unaccompanied minors in group homes and a “bad hombre” toddler who is currently in a Texas detention center. According to the Los Angeles Times, a sharp-eyed immigration attorney was the one to catch the security lapse. Bryan Johnson, “who frequently defends children brought into the U.S. illegally, called it ‘reckless incompetence on the part of the Trump administration’’:

“In their haste to pretend like they care about victims of immigrant crimes, the Trump administration released personally identifiable information regarding vulnerable children at risk of human trafficking and other crimes,” he said. “They should just take it down.”

ICE is as incompetent as it is powerful. It’s bad enough that Donald Trump and his agency want to demonize million of immigrant adults, but now vulnerable children too? Here’s to VOICE soon joining those shaming reports in the trash bin.

28 Apr 00:07

featherquillpen: ezekiels: the most poly “defusing a bomb”...


"We agreed we all change. Better or worse, we change together."



the most poly “defusing a bomb” scene ever to have graced television

I have seen real live three-way makeouts that were less poly than this Leverage episode

27 Apr 23:13

omegajako: historical-nonfiction: Bugs Bunny accidentally transformed the word nimrod into a...



Bugs Bunny accidentally transformed the word nimrod into a synonym for idiot because nobody got a joke where he sarcastically compared Elmer Fudd to the Biblical figure Nimrod, a mighty hunter.

Etymology is ridiculous and terrifying sometimes

27 Apr 22:36

magictransistor:Max Ernst. Une semaine de bonté (A Week of...


Max Ernst. Une semaine de bonté (A Week of Kindness), 1934.

27 Apr 22:35

We Asked ICE About the Prank Calls to Their Anti-Immigrant Hotline and They Kind of Lost Their Shit

by Rafi Schwartz on Fusion, shared by Joanna Rothkopf to Jezebel

"this group’s cheap publicity stunt is beyond the pale of legitimate public discourse."

Honestly, I couldn't have said it better.

On Wednesday morning, the Immigration and Customs Enforcement agency unveiled an office called VOICE (Victims of Immigration Crime Engagement) dedicated to “the needs of crime victims and their families who have been impacted by crimes committed by removable criminal aliens.”


27 Apr 22:34


27 Apr 20:22

awwww-cute:This dog with a pine cone in his mouth makes him look...


This dog with a pine cone in his mouth makes him look like a little demon (Source:

27 Apr 20:19

andallthatmishigas: shanology: Mansplaining: The tweet. This...



Mansplaining: The tweet.

This is performance art.

27 Apr 20:17



At the new year's party (and yes, that was both the last and the next party for me), we were pretty much all introverts. We all wanted to hold the cat.

27 Apr 20:16

eggmacguffin: Photos That look Like Renaissance Paintings


Auto reshare


Photos That look Like Renaissance Paintings

27 Apr 20:12


27 Apr 19:00

voidbat: i get the sentiment behind the “stop saying everyone is beautiful, break down the concept...


i get the sentiment behind the “stop saying everyone is beautiful, break down the concept that ‘beauty’ is something to strive for, teach everyone that beauty isn’t necessary!” posts, i really do. but for me, a fat, older cripple? learning that i could be beautiful was a completely necessary step for me to understand that i didn’t have to be.