when you speak up about your bad therapy experiences and people tell you not to discourage others from getting the help that they need
when you speak up about your bad therapy experiences and people tell you not to discourage others from getting the help that they need
do u ever start typing out a long opinion post and feel very heated and then halfway through realize nothing matters and time is a flat circle and whatever i’m tired
by It’s the Tie
okay this story falls under the ‘sarah is bonkers & has to make everything she does way more difficult than it should be’ category of life decisions
so this happened when i was an undergrad, & i lived in an apartment with this other girl in the same town my parents live in, which was actually an ok setup because i could borrow their car & get free food without having to listen to my father snore or play james taylor’s christmas album. my mother belonged to this farming co-op thing where she’d get a bunch of weird ass veggies & stuff once a week from local farmers (& i grew up in arizona so like. sometimes it was weird shit). & i often got all the extra weird food my parents didnt want to bother cooking because i was a poor college student & didn’t complain about it.
so one week my mom picks up her veggie order & gets this giant monstrous spaghetti squash, its HUGE. my mother HATES spaghetti squash for whatever reason. hates it. naturally she offers to give it to me & i’m like ‘yeah ok sure’ & she’s all ‘sarah i can walk you through how to cook this but i don’t want it in my house i hate these things but tell me if you need help cooking this’ & i’m like ‘MOM i can cook a fucking squash it’s fine i’m 20 years old’
& i become VERY DETERMINED to cook this damn thing because my mother had implied that i didn’t know what i was doing & was helpless & just floundering my way through life. how cooking a giant evil orange oblong squash was gonna prove this i can’t tell you but that’s what i thought. i think i wanted to demonstrate that i was RESOURCEFUL and HEALTHY and ATE ADULT FOOD SHE DOESN’T LIKE.
naturally it was NOT FINE.
i bring the damn thing home & decide it’s too big to really do anything with so i’ll cut it open before i cook it because that’ll be easiest. i DID NOT read any directions on how to cook a spaghetti squash because i was determined to DO IT MYSELF LIKE AN ADULT WHO EATS SPAGHETTI SQUASH AND NEEDS NO HELP FROM NOBODY.
so i pretty quickly realize that i’m pretty unable to actually cut the squash open. it’s massive & has a thick rind & i can’t get a knife into it. i spend probably twenty minutes sitting on my kitchen floor with the squash in my lap trying to stab it with every knife in the kitchen & i can’t even get it fucking started. if i’d owned a fire ax i probably would’ve taken a fire ax to it. & naturally the situation evolves from simply a test of my adulting abilities to a TEST OF MY HONOR AND STRENGTH. I’VE GOT A 4.0 i tell myself I CAN OUTSMART A SQUASH but i can’t because i can’t cut it open. i have a bit of a meltdown at this point because my self worth, which is fragile & bewildering on a good day, is being torn to shreds by a stupid fucking orange gourd.
the logical thing to do at this point would have been to give up because i’m not all that wild about spaghetti squash anyway but i CANT ADMIT DEFEAT I HAVE TO OWN THIS STUPID MOTHERFUCKER!!!!!!
so i decide to stick the squash in a giant pot & boil it for a while until it gets soft enough to be cut open. brilliant. i’m a genius. i’m so pleased with myself. everyone in the entire world could have told me this was a bad idea. if i’d called my mother to ask for her help she would have probably had a heart attack but i didn’t do that because i’m DETERMINED TO WIN.
so i stick the damn thing in the biggest pot i have, put it on the stove, & feeling very pleased with myself go to take a nap because i’ve fought a battle that i am winning
my roommate gets home maybe an hour and a half later, drops her stuff off, sees me sleeping on the couch and walks into the kitchen. and naturally, as soon as she walks into the kitchen the vegetable bomb that i planted in a pot of boiling water on our stove goes the fuck off which is what happens when you put a large round semi-hollow object in a pot of very hot water so steam builds up inside and then forget about it. so roommate walks into the kitchen
and the squash TAKES FLIGHT.
because, surprise, when you let an incredible amount of steam build up inside something shaped like a bomb it will BURST A HOLE IN THE SIDE AND FLY INTO THE AIR LIKE A RED HOT GOURD PROJECTILE
it sounded kind of like someone firing a cannon in our living room so i wake up thinking someone is SHOOTING AT ME, vault over the couch screaming to see the squash launch out of the pot of water straight up into the air. it misses my roommate’s head by maybe a half a foot. she screams and i scream and we both hit the deck and the squash smacks into the ceiling and then to the ground, splattering squash insides all over us and the floor.
needless to say i had a lot of apologizing to do because i almost murdered her with dinner, & i then had to tell my mother that i’d completely failed in making my point about being mature & self sufficient, but had discovered that spaghetti squash work really great as weaponry if the situation ever arises.
i think she laughed at me for forty five minutes.
so there you go, that’s the story about how i almost accidentally committed squash bomb homicide
October 3, 2015
Mike Brown and early stages of the Black Lives Matter movement appear in textbooks.
Oh… Oh jeez, dude, you are late to the party. I’ve been so busy with work I haven’t done that is AGES. But I can see this means a lot to you, so you know who is just OBVIOUSLY trans?
She-Hulk’s whole schtick is a transformation narrative brought about by the miracles of science (specifically, changing her blood chemistry). She changes from a self-loathing, meek person who wants to please others because she doesn’t feel much self-worth, to a strong, vivacious, and happy woman. Unlike the He-Hulk’s “woe is me” narrative, Jennifer’s transformation is a blessing (especially once she learns to control the mood swings that come early in the transition) that makes her happier even if it doesn’t solve all her problems, and at times even causes new ones. Later on in the series she even rejects her old life entirely and loses the ability to transform back into her meek form, in much the same way most trans people eventually reach a point in transition when they can’t look back. Later narratives examined how She-Hulk herself has problems finding work while her hated old identity is still considered very hireable, and eventually She-Hulk is forced to run her own business on a shoestring budget and depends heavily on specialty work from friends. If those aren’t metaphors for a post-transition working life, I don’t know what is.
But I’m not saying She-Hulk is a metaphorical trans woman. I’m saying Shulkie is a literal trans woman. If you go back to her earliest issues (and I have), Jennifer Walters is weedy and tomboyish with sharp features. She and her father love each other very much, but have a strained relationship because of how “everything changed” after her mother died. Jen has very few friends, and none who seem to have known her longer than a few years—it was hard to get permission to transition back in 1980 unless you cut out your old life and hid most of your past. She-Hulk’s go-to color for her costumes is purple, the queer-coded color; more significantly, across her many (many) costume changes, she always comes back to purple with a white accent, and what is purple if not pink and blue? Now, I’m not saying She-Hulk literally wears a trans pride flag, but…
Why Star Trek matters.
Why representation matters too.
Nichelle has devoted a good chunk of her life to helping others Boldly Go…
“Nichols has served as a member of the Board of Directors for the National Space Institute (now the National Space Society), and been active in the leadership of the Space Cadets of America, an organization for young people interested in space and space careers. Through her consultant firm, Women in Motion, Inc., Nichols was instrumental in the NASA Astronaut Corps pioneering effort to break away from their all-white, all-male past. She received NASA’s distinguished Public Service Award for her efforts and continued success.” — NSS
Nichelle Nichols’ recruits for NASA include:
- Dr. Sally Ride, first American woman in space
- Colonel Guion Bluford, first black man in space
- Dr. Judith Resnik, second American woman in space
- Dr. Ronald McNair, second black man in space
- Dr. Mae Jemison, first black woman in space
- Lt. Col. Ellison Onizuka, first Asian-American in space
- Current NASA adminstrator Charles Bolden
- Former NASA Deputy Administrator Lori Garver
Honestly it’s not that surprising people can’t accept bisexuals exist when people still think you can’t like both dogs and cats
THIS is what the internet is for.
please be aware that the correct way to replace ä, ö, ü, ß is turning them into ae, oe, ue, and ss, not just taking the dots away or typing “B”.
Otherwise you can get things like,
“Das Wetter ist sehr schwül heute.”
= “The weather is very hot and humid today.”
“Das Wetter ist sehr schwul heute.”
= “The weather is very gay today.”
well I now know how to call the weather gay
So, it’s like in Polish.
“Zrobić łaskę” means “Do mercy to someone”
“Zrobić laskę” means “Make a blowjob”.
I cannot think of a case where removing the dots of ä and ö in Finnish would result in something naughty (if you can, please contribute) but the same thing applies, ä and ö are completely different from a and o, and one does not simply remove the dots.
Näin appelsiineja = I saw oranges.
Nain appelsiineja = I fucked oranges.
its even worse in turkish doe cus like
Sık dişini?? Hang in there/Endure
Sik dişini?? Literally just fuck your tooth
Even in Spanish:
Feliz año nuevo = happy new year
Feliz ano nuevo = happy new butthole
Tá mo chroí briste = My heart is broken.
Tá mo chroí bríste = My heart is trousers.
Bølle = thug
Bolle = fucking
It is a truth universally acknowledged that a language that uses diacritics must have a minimal pair with and without diacritics that means something rude.
Loose chicken terrorizes San Francisco highway, causes major traffic jam
Why did the chicken cross the road?
T̰̥̣̭̝̪͉͡O ̥̗͈S͏O̪͕̩̼̙W̼̩̫͙̺̦ ̯͉̪̀C̩̖̤HĄ̥OS͓ ͚͠I͚̙̟̥̣͠Ṋ̛̱̠̲͎̘ ̯̟̥T҉͓̟̭̦̼H͓̪͇͇̭͙E̡̜̠ͅ ͓̫̯ͅH͇̗͚̣͈͔̬È̻͙̣͚̮͇A̡R̭̜̱T͓̞S̖̠͔̤̗̩͈ ̝̣̯̪̬̻O̷F̮̼̞ ̢̱T҉̫̦̝H̳͖̟̦͍̫͢È̼̼̗̪ ̢̦Í̲̖̠͈̪͚͙NN̬O͏͓C̢͍̣̟͍̤̖E̩̠̯̝N̺Ṯ̶̻̟̭
Like, a little one? But no fire or anything. Mostly like my psychotic cat, but probably with less fur. Same amount of snuggles, though.
Reblog if you, ace spectrum or not, would rather have a dragon than have sex.
The colorful illustrations of Laura Callaghan
A selection of the colorful illustrations by Laura Callaghan, a British illustrator based in London who uses a mixture of watercolor, markers and pen, featuring her girls into explosive and girly trash compositions.
I like how there's an assumption that the choice to date or not date is somehow up to him?
SAY IT AGAIN
What Busa has found is illustrated in the above image: a systematic and very sophisticated effort to make the simple act of going to the polls much, much more difficult for North Carolina's black voters. From Busa's presentation:
North Carolina Republicans have been actively moving the goalposts—they've been moving polling places around like a crazed monkey on crack. They have been cutting numbers of polling places in some counties, increasing numbers in other counties. There has been no systematic analysis of the effect of this. All I've been able to find in any news outlet is, you know: a little local newspaper, say Winston-Salem's, will say: "the number of early voting sites is twelve this year...by the way, it was fifteen last year." That's it. Nobody has taken an overall view. […]Most of the voter suppression actions taken by the new Republican majority legislature and McCrory have been very transparent, very apparent to the public: redistricting to corral black votes; voter ID; reducing early voting days; eliminating same day registration; and, particularly damaging to the black voter, eliminating voting on the Sunday before the election, the traditional "Souls to the Polls" activity of black churches. All of that was well publicized. This, however, this eliminating and moving of polling places was done very quietly. In Busa's words: "There was no systematic 'we're going to go into one hundred counties, we're going to steal polling places from blacks in all one hundred counties.' What there was was a rather more efficient and slimy way of doing the same thing." It was done under the radar of everybody but Busa and his partner, who sniffed out the problem and have the statistical analysis chops to document it.
The headline outcome from our analysis is that in 2014 white voters—71% of the electorate in North Carolina—had to travel an additional 119,000 miles from their homes to their nearest Early Voting locations...which is approximately equivalent to halfway from the Earth to the Moon.
I hear you ask, "how did it affect black voters?" Well, black voters—22% of the electorate—had to travel to the moon and halfway home again, 370,000 miles, in 2014, to get to their nearest Early Voting place. […]
Social equity. Rev. Barber was talking last night about how we should make moral arguments; we shouldn't be talking about liberals and conservatives, we should be talking about right and wrong. And the right and wrong of it is that the well-to-do, like many of us in this room, have a much higher degree of mobility and a lot more freedom to say "I'm not coming into work...I'll be a half an hour late, because I'm going to stop off and vote first." Wage slaves in a low-wage job, which a lot of people of color are stuck in today, don't have that opportunity, to tell the manager of McDonald's "I'm going to be a half hour late today because I'm going to vote." So, I really insist that excessive distance-to-poll is a poll tax. It costs you money to go vote, and the more money it costs, the fewer poor people vote.
Watch his presentation and read the transcript of the whole thing below the fold. Get mad, then get organized. How do you get organized? By doing what DocDawg calls for:
The kind of solution I would like to propose is to take this approach to launch what, for lack of a better name, I'll call the Fair Places Project. Why can't we put together an organization that uses geospatial data science to document disparities such as I've shown you, and then goes to the relevant county boards of elections and says, "Excuse us...you have a problem in your county. You have an enormous racial disparity with respect to distance-to-poll. And, gosh, that's unconstitutional. And we'd like to help you with that."Thanks to DocDawg/Bill not only for this critical information, but for providing his own transcript!
Kansas, June 11, 1922
"To be fair, the world DOES revolve around me"
~ My Brain
when you can never tell what people are saying or who they are saying it to so whenever someone speaks loudly you assume they are yelling at you
Another week has gone by and you made it! Congratulations!
An excellent source of debate! And fiber!
People kill people, and guns help people kill even more people.
Here’s a mini revelation I had today about how attention is gendered.
I think basically everybody who cares about this stuff has by now seen the endless studies on how much more men talk than women do in meetings and classroom settings, and how there’s a huge discrepancy between how much women actually talk vs. how much they’re perceived by men to be talking. This tallies with anecdotal experience, I think: men demand a lot of attention and they receive it, and women are punished for asking for less than half as much attention.
It occurred to me today that part of the problem here might be that men think women are already getting attention, because they perceive their policing and harassment of women as attention.
When I think about the kinds of attention I don’t get, and which I want, none of it has to do with my physical appearance or with sexual activity. The kinds of attention I don’t get, but do want, are things like: recognition for my accomplishments. Respect when I speak on topics in which I am an expert. Solicitation of my opinion, whether fannish or professional.
But the attention I generally get instead in public spaces and workspaces is: comments on my appearance. Harassment for sexual favors. Requests for work favors. And most of all, all the fucking time, demands that I listen to men talking, which I’m increasingly sure is an activity that those men count under the heading of Paying Attention to a Woman. Because, y’know, they’re interacting at me, so that counts as paying attention to me. Right?
It’s the only thing I can think of that explains why women are seen as demanding attention all the time, when in fact I’ve seen numerous men literally shout women down just because their opinionboner is so fucking important to them. Men think that women are already getting attention, because to them, women getting attention means men evaluating women, talking at women, and asking women to do work or have sex with them, whereas men getting attention means… men evaluating women, talking at women, and asking women to do work or have sex with them. GOSH.
tl;dr: Not paying attention to men for ten seconds is a feminist act tbh
No, this is good and important and it really explains the idea of the “attention whore”, the idea that a woman could want “more” attention than just the male gaze we can’t opt-out from. Even just appearing at all is seen as an appeal to men, just existing in many spaces is met with the weird delusion that you’re faking your authentic presence and are just there “to get men’s attention.” So when women first appear in these spaces at all, and then correct the improper ‘attentions’ (read: objectification and patronization) of men we’re seen as “babe I’m already paying attention to you what more do you want?”
like that’s the paradox of hypervisibility yet erasure able to exist in the same world. “fake geek girl” yet “oh my god we get it shut up about being a girl who plays video games”. On one hand, the girl being there at all has to be ‘fake’ and have an ulterior motive of appealing to men. But when she asserts that she’s not there for men, suddenly she’s demanding “twice” what men think is her natural share of attention– they won’t STOP objectifying her, so they think she wants their original objectifying attention PLUS real respect.
The video games thing is a simple example. Women at work get another version of this– to be there at all and to be talked to at all seems exceptional, so being positively aggressive (asking for a raise, not being passive) is seen as “too much.” Meanwhile the aggression of men (positive or otherwise) is taken for granted.
We want constructive attention swapped for the other destructive kind. Not added to it or “more.” We want men to stop doing these dismissive, minimizing things, not for them to ‘work harder’ to ‘attend’ to us.
So Alabama closes 31 driver license offices. And while the cuts come across Alabama, they are deepest in the Black Belt. The harm is inflicted disproportionately on voters who happen to be black, and poor, in sparsely populated areas.
So roll out the welcome wagon to the Justice Department, and tell the world what it already so desperately wants to hear.
That Alabama is exactly what they always thought she was.
That Alabama refuses to pay for its own government, and used it as an excuse to keep black people from the polls. That Alabama hasn’t changed a bit.
I’d say they have us all wrong. I’d love to say they have us all wrong.But the numbers say they don’t.”
I like the balloon one, but I think I'll encourage the nephews to not be racist and say call them something else. Capitalists, maybe.