Matt

Dicks! Everyone’s got ‘em! Hell, most of us got too many of them! If you’re looking for some Cool Uses for the extra dicks you may have lying around your house/apartment/storage unit, here are a few ideas:

• Lawn darts: Throw ‘em in the air, watch them lodge themselves in the grass. Teabag your way to a good time!

• Drain Rooter: Tie a few of those suckers together, shove ‘em down your clogged shower drain, give em a rub and blast pesky hair clots to kingdom come.

• Jump Rope: After you’re done with the shower, hand that flaccid dick rope to the kids and let them have some fun in the yard. “Cinderella, Dressed in Yella!” Always a classic!

• Ruler: Measure items four inches or under with an average sized dick! If you have an extra big object, measure it with an extra super big dick (~5 inches)

• Thermos: A hollowed out dick makes a great thermos.

• Throne: Turn that sad pile of dicks in the corner of your den into the centerpiece of your home! Grab some Krazy Glue and get creative!

• A Full Sized Sex Doll: Craft a mate out of several hundred dicks. Make a man or a woman, it’s up to you! So is whatever you choose to do with it

T

The Rabbit that Saw Tomorrow  (Random House, 1943)

Whee!

Technology media outlet Delimiter today revealed it would establish a free file-serving mirror of PDF documents published under Freedom of Information laws by the Attorney-General's Department and relevant to the technology sector, in the wake of confirmation by the department that it has removed such documents from its website.

We’re still about 150 years away from the invention of the universal translator by [Lt Cdr Sato] of the Enterprise NX-01, but [Dave] has something that’s almost as good: a speech recognition, translation, and text to speech setup for the Raspberry Pi that theoretically allows anyone to speak in sixty different languages.

After setting up all the Linux audio cruft, [Dave] digs in and starts on converting the guttural vocalizations of a meat speaker into something Google’s speech to text service can understand. From there, it’s off to Google again, this time converting text in one language into the writings of another.

[Dave]‘s end result is a shell script that works reasonably well for something that won’t be invented for another 150 years. The video below shows the script successfully translating English to spanish, but it should work equally well with other languages such as dutch and latin, as well as less popular language such as esperanto and french.

The season three story arc was an allegory for 9/11 and the lead-up to the invasion of Iraq, people. It was genius.

Filed under: Raspberry Pi

MORE TOP TIPS FROM VARIOUS CHEFS: IF YOU NEED TO CHECK IF YOUR POTATOES ARE COOKED, MERELY SAMPLE SOME WITH A SPOON

HE WON’T MIND

REMEMBER

AFTER ALL

THAT HE IS MERELY A POTATO

There’s no shortage of free resources for web development, but finding the right tool for the task can be tricky. Design Junction has collated a list of free web development software which you can sort or filter by category. More »

Google released a 21-part short video series that introduces R. Most of the videos are about two minutes, with none of them going over six, and each one is a on focused task or concept. So this could be a good way to start. Just open R, start a video, and follow along.

Here's the first video in the series. It shows you how to write a simple script and navigate:

[via Revolutions]

The title says it all. Jonathon Green, a slang lexicographer, has two new timelines. The first is an interactive timeline that shows slang for male genitalia going all the way back to the 1300s up to present. Colors and shapes represent different parts.

Then naturally there's the timeline for female genitalia. It has slang terms that date back to 1250. Yep.

Don't worry. The drought of Hitler jokes won't last forever.

mission

Mistakes! We’ve all made them. Once when I was a kid I shaved off part of my eyebrows just because I was bored! Check my middle-school yearbook if you don’t believe me. Just look for the Coolest Dude in Class! My mother still doesn’t let me live that one down. I’M SORRY, MOM.

Luckily, I learned my lesson and never made a mistake again. Everything’s pretty great these days. I’ve got nice, full eyebrows. Extra eyebrows, even! As a matter of fact, I have too many eyebrows. If anyone is looking for some extra eyebrows, I have a whole warehouse full of ‘em. Cardboard box upon cardboard box, filled with bushy eyebrows, sitting in the damp darkness, sucking up mildew like big, hairy mildew magnets. Rotting away along with my life savings. Why did I buy all these eyebrows. This was a terrible mistake.

Tony

The curator puts it a little more succinctly: Shit for making websites. [shitformakingwebsites.com]