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Naïve Toddler Getting Awfully Attached To 90-Year-Old Grandmother

DAVENPORT, IA—Perplexed by the toddler’s affection for the nonagenarian, sources confirmed Tuesday that local 2-year-old Ava Kerper was getting awfully attached to her 90-year-old grandmother. “She knows the average life expectancy is like, 77, right?” said the sources, who scoffed while watching the child…
Walmart Cuts Starting Wages

Walmart has made adjustments to its pay scale, lowering the starting hourly wages for some jobs such as shelf stockers and those who pack online orders. What do you think?
How to see a newly discovered green comet this week, before it vanishes for 400 years

A newly discovered green comet is zipping by Earth and is now visible for the first time since before Galileo invented his telescope.
(Image credit: Dan Bartlett/NASA)
Study: More Americans Buying AR-15s To Defend Selves From Toddlers Who Found Their Guns

WASHINGTON—Shedding light on the enduring appeal behind assault rifle ownership, a Pew study released Monday revealed that more Americans were buying AR-15s to defend themselves from toddlers who found their guns. “Many Americans stressed that they felt safer knowing they had an AR-15 at the ready in case their…
Instacart Valuation Crashes As Americans Realize They Can Do Some Things For Themselves

SAN FRANCISCO—With the grocery delivery company filing an IPO that suggested it was worth tens of billions of dollars less than it used to be, sources reported Monday that Instacart’s valuation had plummeted as more Americans realized they could do some things for themselves. “The 80% drop in value over the past…
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Very sweet review of Bea Wolf from Gene Ambaum, whom I've known since ancient times.
Twinkies are sold! J.M. Smucker scoops up Hostess Brands for $5.6 billion

For Hostess, the deal with the peanut-butter-and-jelly conglomerate is a sweet win after not one, but two bankruptcies.
(Image credit: Scott Olson/Getty Images)
Houston’s nighttime temperatures finally turn a little bit cooler as peak summer ends
Thanks to a drier airmass this weekend, we’ve seen overnight low temperatures dropping from their extreme highs this summer. Lows this weekend at Bush Intercontinental Airport were 71 and 70 degrees on Saturday and Sunday mornings. This slightly drier air will start to mix out over the next couple of days, leading to a better chance of rain later this week.
Highs will be in the mid- to upper-90s to start the week, but should cool off a bit with the better rain chances toward the end of the week. And another weak front appears to be on the horizon by late weekend that may—just maybe—push daytime highs into the upper 80s for some locations. No promises!

Monday
With light northeasterly winds today, we’re going to see continued sunny skies and highs in the mid- to upper-90s. Due to the light winds, the Texas Commission on Environmental Quality has issued an Ozone Action Day, meaning that atmospheric conditions are expected to be favorable for producing high levels of ozone pollution today. People who are sensitive to this should take precautions such as limiting time outdoors. Low temperatures tonight will be a few degrees warmer, likely in the mid-70s for much of the area. This is still considerably cooler than we’ve experienced for most of the summer.
Tuesday
Another sunny day, a lot like Monday. However as winds become easterly and southeasterly we’ll see a bit more humidity. Expect mostly sunny skies and highs generally in the mid- to upper-90s. Rain chances remain essentially zero.
Wednesday and Thursday
The atmosphere turns more perturbed by mid-week, and with slightly higher atmospheric moisture levels we should start to see better rain chances by Wednesday afternoon or evening. Daily rain chances will be on the order of 40 to 50 percent, probably. Showers most likely will not last super long, but some areas could receive a decent soaking of a few tenths of an inch of rainfall, or more. Daytime highs will depend on the extent of rain and cloud cover, but for the most part expect temperatures in the low- to mid-90s.
Friday
Our rain chances look to peak on Friday, with coverage of perhaps 60 or 70 percent of the area. Look for highs, again, to be in the low- to mid-90s. Accumulations for Saturday look higher for inland areas, perhaps an inch or more, and lesser closer to the coast.

Saturday and Sunday
Some rain chances will linger into Saturday, but for the most part skies should be mostly sunny with highs in the low- to mid-90s. Rain chances should end definitively by Sunday, as another weak front appears likely to push into the area. The extent of this front’s influence remains a bit unclear, but we should at least see some drier and slightly cooler air by Sunday or Monday night.
Next week
Most of next week should see sunny skies, with highs possibly in the upper 80s to start the week, before warming back into the low- to mid-90s.
I’m not ready to declare “Fall Day” yet, as that comes with the season’s first decently strong front, which knocks air temperatures down to 65 degrees or below. And this definitely is not “fall-like” weather. But it is fairly typical for mid-September, and an improvement from a few weeks ago.

my coworkers say I should hold back because I’m early-career … but am I?
This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager.
A reader writes:
I’m having a hard time figuring out my career stage. I entered a male-dominated, technical, and niche field right out of college. I worked for several years, then eventually went back to school for my graduate degree. I worked throughout school, so have been in the field for nine years.
Most of my colleagues didn’t get their first full-time job in this field until later in life, so my “peers” (in terms of years in this field, job title, and salary) are ~10 to 20 years older than I am. I’m also a young-looking woman of color in a mostly white company. All these details might be irrelevant, but I am aware that I stick out in my organization.
The problem: Some of my colleagues have taken on an informal “mentor” role for me (this part is fine), but they are repeatedly coaching me to hold back on certain growth opportunities with the consistent reminder that I am “early career.” These opportunities include leadership roles in service organizations, projects with external clients, and more. I know for a fact that these activities are required for promotion in my organization, which is something I’d like to apply for within three years (which would be at five years in my present role, 12 total in this field).
This is a typical interaction:
Me: I was invited to manage an account for Prestigious Client. Should I do it?
Colleague: I’ve worked with them once. That would look great for promotion. But you are still early-career, so maybe hang back.
Me: Oh, okay, do you have a sense that I might get a similar opportunity again?
Colleague: They look for new account managers once a year, but normally target higher-level or mid-career professionals [so why was I invited?]. You should really take your time to settle in and decide what you want to do with your career.
I worry these “mentors” are either (1) being protective of their own promotional prospects, (2) wanting to diminish me out of jealousy that someone younger might be close to their same level, and/or (3) basing their assessment of my career progress on when I completed my degree, despite the fact that I have the same or greater experience level as they do (in terms of years, numbers of accounts managed, dollars in revenue, etc.). I don’t want to misread their intentions, but I have been burned in the past. My supervisor is passive and generally encourages me to say yes to whatever interests me.
How do I sort out what stage I’m at in my career, when I don’t look like the traditional person in my field? And how do I learn how to trust colleagues’ intentions with their advice? Their support means a lot to me, but I don’t want to look back in a few years and realize I held myself back.
You are not early-career.
You’re not early-career simply based on the fact that you’ve been in your field for nine years (early-career would just be the first few years — in most fields, the first two to three). And it’s especially ridiculous for your colleagues to be saying you’re early-career when you have the same or more experience as they do, as measured by number of years and type of work you’re doing! Their framing doesn’t stand up to logic.
You’re mid-career. These categories don’t really have precise definitions, but nine years in, you’re past early-career.
I don’t know if your colleagues are trying to get you to see yourself as inexperienced in a deliberate attempt to guard their own turf or protect their own opportunities, or whether it’s out of jealousy; either of those is possible. Maybe they just see someone who looks young and graduated more recently than they did, and that puts you in the “early-career box” in their minds … and they’re not applying any critical thinking to realize that if you have the same (or more!) years of experience in the field as they do, and they themselves are not early-career, then obviously you aren’t either. I don’t know — it could be any of those.
What I do know is that you should stop listening to them when they encourage you to hold yourself back. At a minimum, their advice is based on a wildly inaccurate perception of your experience level. Whether there’s something more going on too, who knows. But you should stop asking for their advice about what opportunities you take, and if they offer that up unsolicited you shouldn’t listen to it.
If you find them to be helpful sounding boards on other things, great — listen to them on the stuff that you find useful. Maybe you find value in their advice on the work itself. But under no circumstances should you let them influence the projects/clients/promotions/other opportunities you pursue, or how you see yourself positioned in the field more broadly. They’re wrong about that.
I’d love for you to spend the next year assuming you have the power/gravitas/standing that they’re making you doubt you have, and see what happens.
Hiker Climbs Up Ridge To Get Better View Of Where Fallen Body Will Be Found

MARIPOSA, CA—Taking in the picturesque sight of where he will die, local hiker Lucas Tribold reportedly climbed up a ridge Monday to get a better view of where his fallen body will be found. “Wow, the climb was tough, but totally worth it for this breathtaking view of my final resting place,” said Tribold, totally at…
Americans Reveal What It’s Like Living With The Woke Mind Virus

With the ailment blamed for many of the problems in the country, The Onion asked Americans what it is like to live with the Woke Mind Virus, and this is what they said.
September 10, 2023 Outlook: Lee struggling and slowing down as it continues over the open ocean
One-sentence summary
While the final forecast for Lee is no clearer today than it was previously, there are some signs that we can begin to hone in on a region more likely to see Lee eventually.
Hurricane Lee: 105 mph, moving WNW 9 mph
What’s changed since yesterday?
Lee has continued to have to battle shear, and as a result it has weakened back to a category 2 storm with 105 mph winds. Lee has also slowed its forward speed down as expected by about 5 mph versus yesterday.

Everything else is mostly on track as forecast.
Lee’s intensity forecast
I had sort of expected to see that Lee would organize a bit more yesterday evening, but that failed to materialize. Modeling suggests that shear may relax a little over Lee, but I’m wondering if that ever happens. The direction of the shear may change, which could, I guess, lead to some readjustment on the intensity outlook here. In general, modeling forecasts intensification again over the next 2 days or so before a slow weakening trend. Lee will probably compensate a bit for weakening by growing its wind field over the next week as it goes north.

Lee’s track forecast
I’ll preface this by saying that confidence in Lee’s final outcome isn’t higher today than it was yesterday. However, there have been a few trends worth noting. First, the forecast track of Margot seems to have come into better agreement among models since yesterday, taking it more straight north than north-northwest. This tends to reduce the odds of an interaction with Lee. Perhaps one less variable in the equation then.
Second, there seems to have been a bit of a boost in agreement in Lee’s track as it comes north, or what I would say is “less spread” in the track. We now have ensemble modeling in moderate agreement on a track aimed broadly toward Nova Scotia late.

Now, a few big things to note here. First, just because we now have moderate track agreement toward Nova Scotia does not mean a.) that Nova Scotia is the target for Lee when it comes north or b.) that impacts will not be felt far outside that track. The ultimate track of Lee continues to bounce around in both time and space. The timing differences have narrowed a bit today along the track of Lee, which means by tomorrow or Tuesday we can probably peg the timing of impacts a bit better. Secondly, while most modeling broadly points it to between Downeast Maine and Nova Scotia, it does not mean that Cape Cod or Newfoundland can unplug here. There is still a wide array of tracks and options, including a handful that try to nudge it back northwest toward even Long Island or southern New England.
So, we’ve been slowly “clearing” places from Lee, and I think today that may include North Carolina. Modeling shows this staying well east of North Carolina now, so from there south to Florida, this isn’t your storm. Bermuda? Still needs to watch closely. I would probably continue to watch this from Virginia to New Jersey, watching it fairly close from Long Island through Rhode Island, and watch it very close between Cape Cod and Newfoundland, including New Brunswick and Prince Edward Island.
Again, no one knows for sure where Lee will go. The best we can do is gradually narrow the focus a little. In the meantime, expect rough surf and rip currents to be prominent issues in the Bahamas, Bermuda, and up and down the East Coast this week. More on Lee tomorrow.
Margot and 97L
As I noted above, Tropical Storm Margot’s track is coming into better focus today. Margot is expected to go basically due north or maybe just slightly west of due north over the next several days. It is also expected to become a hurricane.
Margot is still not expected to impact land.
Behind Margot, we have now established the new Invest 97L, which is located just west of the Cabo Verde Islands. Some operational modeling has gone wild with this one, bringing it to the Gulf or up the East Coast. We continue to not really see that as a major concern right now. We’ll keep tabs on 97L, but the odds of developing are only around 30 percent or so in the meantime.
Otherwise, the Gulf and Caribbean continue to look quiet for the next 7 to 10 days or longer.
my retired predecessor wants to keep coming in, fake face tattoos, and more
This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager.
It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…
1. My retired predecessor wants to keep coming in
I accepted my new position over a month ago. I have been in the executive administrative field for over 20 years. I was hired to replace a woman who worked this position for 32 years, although with different leaders. I can appreciate her knowledge, but she believes no one will ever be able to do this job. That’s where my issue comes in.
I trained with the current/retired assistant for 30 days, and she left less than a week ago. I was just informed she would like to work eight hours a week to make sure things are done and so people (aka, me) can ask questions. In her email to the president, she also states, “I would like to make a list every month of things Jane needs to do.” Oh my.
To put my first 30 days into perspective, here are a few incidents. During my training, she sat right next to me, day after day. I patiently listened and tolerated her watchful eye, even as I opened the mail. Trust me, I can operate a letter opener. At one point I was asked by the VP and dean of faculty to forward an email to him (he approached me in the hallway), I returned to my desk and started to forward the message, and she stopped me and asked, “What are you doing?” I told her and she said, “No, stop.” She then got up, and tracked down the VP and dean to ask if he really wanted me to forward the email. She returned to my side, approved that it was okay for me to send the it, and literally watched as I sent it. Really?
I know the president and HR director are going to ask me how I feel about her coming back a few hours a week. I need to approach this logically, kindly, and as a professional.
Yeah, that’s a terrible idea. You’ve already seen why: she’s having trouble letting go and will prevent you from doing the job you were hired to do and making it your own.
Say this when you’re asked for input: “I’d have serious concerns about being able to take full ownership of the job and make it my own if we did that.” If they seem surprised, you should add, “During our training period, Lucinda was very reluctant to let me do things on my own, even simple tasks, and it would be tough to take ownership of the role with that arrangement. It seems likely to cause a lot of confusion, and — candidly — it would be difficult to work like that.”
2. Did our new hire take their ID photo with fake face tattoos?
I work for a large organization and we have new hire orientation every Monday. This past Monday, Security came to a couple of us in HR to see if they needed to do anything about a new hire’s badge photo. It looked like the guy had written in marker all over his face to replicate tattoos. Like Post Malone, but much worse. I asked a member of my team, who was on-site to give a presentation, if they looked real or like marker and he said they looked real, just very poorly done. The new hire didn’t have any other visible tattoos.
Now, if this person has lots of low quality but not offensive facial tattoos, that’s not actually an issue. Lots of visible tattoos aren’t the norm in our industry, but they aren’t uncommon. I have a half sleeve and some that are visible when I wear shorts (we’re a casual group!). What is more concerning is this person’s judgement if they came to orientation with marker all over their face. Our security specs require ID badges to show how an employee looks day to day, but we don’t make people get new ones if they dye their hair or start wearing glasses. This new hire’s ID photo shows all these marks/tattoos.
Is there some language we can add to our security badge form that may cover this situation? Were we being too cautious in not just asking this new hire if they had facial tattoos? We may be making a mountain out of a molehill, but we were flabbergasted!
I agree it would be incredibly bizarre judgment for a new hire to show up on their first day of work with marker all over their face … but it doesn’t sound like there’s any real cause to believe that happened. The employee who saw the tattoos in person thought they were real, and they’re probably real. That’s much more likely than someone choosing to get their ID photo taken with marker all over their face.
If there’s any doubt, though, you can solve this pretty quickly by just asking the person, “Just to be sure, are those permanent tattoos in your ID photo?” (Of course, once you say that, they’re going to worry that you’re asking because face tattoos aren’t allowed, so be prepared to clarify.)
I don’t think you need to add language to your security badge form to ward this off — because, again, it’s highly unlikely to happen. If it does, you can address it at that point and have the employee take a new photo … but in that situation, the person’s judgment is going to be the bigger issue, so adding language to the form isn’t where you would need to focus your energy.
3. My boss told me to stop wearing a jacket with our old logo
My company gave us some light jackets last year for Christmas with the company logo on it. They are light, comfortable, and fit well.
Recently, the company went through a rebranding. They gave us some new things with the new logo on them, including a new jacket. In the meeting about the rebrand, they asked us to get rid of everything with the old logo on it.
Well, the new jacket is way too small. It doesn’t come close to zipping up and I can barely extend my arms forward. I decided I will just wear the old one because the new one doesn’t fit me (I ordered the same size as the one they gave us last year). I did get rid of everything else with the old logo on it.
My boss was upset that I was wearing the old jacket and told me I wasn’t allowed to wear it anymore. I’m not in a client-facing role. I feel that this is ridiculous because it’s not like we changed our name or got bought out by another company or something. It’s the same name, just in a different font.
I am the sole breadwinner for my family and quite truthfully can’t afford to buy a jacket without any branding on it. It’s also incredibly difficult to find clothing that fits me well because I have a kind of permanent six-months-pregnant-ish looking belly that is disproportionately big compared to the rest of my body, so I am pretty disappointed that they are saying I just can’t wear the old jacket at all at work when it fit me so well (it was also a lot lighter than the new jacket, so it was perfect for the office). Am I being overly difficult?
Typically part of rebranding is being consistent about not using an old logo anymore, so it’s not surprising that your employer is telling you not to wear the old logo items at work anymore. But even if you think they’re being unreasonable, they definitely have the standing to say you can’t do it — and yes, you’d be being overly difficult if you dig in your heels and keep showing up in the old jacket after being told not to.
If it’s not an option to order a larger size, any chance you can replace the logo on the old jacket with the new logo? Obviously that won’t work if it’s screen-printed on there, but if it’s, say, embroidered, it might be an easy job for a sewist.
4. My company will let you carry over vacation days — but it’s a secret and you have to know to ask
I was talking to my colleague in HR about this, and was struggling to explain why it felt so wrong. I’m in a systems implementation role, and I’m currently working closely with her to implement a new HRIS. She came to me to ask how we would make the following adjustments to the vacation policy.
Currently, we have a policy of not carrying over any vacation days from one year to the next (where I live, this is quite unusual, so it’s pretty mean). Now, the CFO wants to “allow people to carry over up to three days, but we won’t publicize it.” I pushed my HR contact on what that would mean, and she said people could claim hardship, or in cases where they had been sick and therefore unable to use vacation leave, or had too much vacation time left in December and weren’t able to take it, could carry over up to three days. The more I pushed, the more it felt like “anyone who has the balls to ask for it and can cobble together a vaguely coherent argument” would probably be allowed to carry over.
It feels very wishy-washy to me, and I can’t help but feel that the most likely beneficiaries of this policy will be the more senior individuals, the sales guys with confidence who believe they can charm a snake out of a basket, and anyone else with a great sense of entitlement, while the less senior, more “obedient,” and less confident (I class myself as two, if not three out of three!) will miss out.
I got upset and was trying to explain why I felt it was discriminatory, but I don’t think I had much success. Am I nuts? Is there a better argument against this than a general feeling of sadness that my friend who is an apprentice will likely never be approved to carry over, but the CEO won’t even need to explain beyond the fact they have almost twice as much holiday as the rest of us, so they need to carry over?
Yeah, that’s BS. “Had too much vacation time left in December and wasn’t able to take it” covers pretty much anyone who might want to carry over some days, no? By definition anyone interested in rolling over their days would fall in the category of “has days left in December.” It’s one thing to say that they’ll make exceptions in cases of genuine hardship, but this really does mean, as you say, “we’ll make exceptions for anyone who makes the case to us” — and it’s really bad practice to have secret policies that only benefit people who know to ask.
You’re right that it’s likely to mean that the people who ask are overrepresented in some groups (the same demographics that are more likely to, for example, successfully negotiate their salaries) and the people who don’t ask will be overrepresented in others. Also, by leaving approval to the company’s discretion, it opens the door to discrimination in who gets their requests granted and who doesn’t. You can try pointing that out, but you’re probably better off going over your colleague’s head if that’s an option.
5. What does this email from my interviewer mean?
I had a job interview last week and now I’m trying to read in between the lines to see if I’m moving forward. One of the hiring managers was straightforward with me, saying, “I’ll be in touch soon.” I sent thank-you letters to all of the panel members. I did receive two two responses promptly. However, the responses were vague. For example, “It was nice to meet you as well.” Should I read this as a positive sign or just continue my job search?
“It was nice to meet you as well” literally just means “it was nice to meet you as well.” It doesn’t mean anything about your chances either way; it’s just a normal polite response!
You are falling into the trap I wrote about at Slate last month, where you are trying to read clues in basic boilerplate language that doesn’t carry any hidden meaning.
That said, you should indeed continue your job search — not because these people are signaling in imminent rejection, but because you should always continue searching until you have an offer (and not just an offer, but an offer that you’ve negotiated and accepted and set a start date for).
Tom Brady Fails To Connect With Children In First Half Of Custody Weekend

MIAMI—As the former quarterback hung his head on the way to the shower, Tom Brady confirmed to reporters Saturday evening that he had failed to connect with his children in the first half of his custody weekend. “I was out of sync with my kids from the moment they got dropped off this morning, and no matter how hard I…
Private Equity Firm Announces 2030 Goal Of Making Everything A Little Grayer, A Little Less Full Of Joy

NEW YORK—In an effort to establish clear and definable targets for the coming decade, private equity firm Hawthorne Capital announced Monday an ambitious 2030 goal of making everything a little grayer, a little less full of joy. “Over the coming years, we’ve established a strategic focus across several key sectors to…
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Jonas Brothers Make Tree-House Pact To Divorce Mean Wives And Marry Each Other

LOS ANGELES—Spitting into their palms to cement the deal, Nick, Joe, and Kevin Jonas reportedly made a tree-house pact Friday to divorce their mean wives and marry each other. “Everything was so much better when it was just us Jonas boys, and that’s how it should always be,” said newly separated Joe Jonas, slipping a…
Mexico Supreme Court Decriminalizes Abortion

Mexico’s Supreme Court has thrown out all federal criminal penalties for abortion, ruling that national laws prohibiting the procedure violate women’s rights in a sweeping decision that extended Latin America’s trend of widening abortion access. What do you think?










