Cowboy Who?

Last month we talked about the weirdest things you’ve ever been scolded for at work, and here are 15 of the most ridiculous stories you shared.

1. The unclassified materials

I work for a Department of Defense contractor, have a clearance, and once had a two-drawer safe in my office, for storing classified documents. Our security department audited the safe once when I wasn’t around, and left a violation notice – about the (clean) gym clothes and sneakers I stashed in there. Because they were unclassified.

2. The suppository

I get scolded for telling my ex-supervisor in private that the word she meant to use was “depository” and when she told me to create a “suppository” for everyone to use, it didn’t mean what she thought it meant. Oh boy. She went off the deep end. Screamed at me that she knew what she said and she said what she meant, and she didn’t need someone like me correcting her.

She continued to tell people I was creating a “suppository” for everyone to use for another seven weeks.

3. The unprofessional pen choices

I had a performance review where the only area for feedback I was given was that my pen choices (in a software job) were insufficiently professional. In the intervening decades I’ve always tried to have the most unprofessional pen choices possible to live up to that. #scented #glitter #scentedglitter

4. The scrunchies

I have a coworker who will NOT let it go that I don’t match colored hair scrunchies to my outfit. I bought a pack of six scrunchies a while ago, and with a fairly limited color selection I obviously can’t match anything exactly, so I decided to go for completely opposite colors of scrunchies to my shirts to make it a ~creative choice~ instead. She simply will not stop commenting on it in annoyance! She tried to pull me aside for a lecture about how “distracting” it was. She even tried to go to management about it, to which she was told to let it go (she hasn’t).

Obviously, with all the drama surrounding it I mismatch the scrunchies even harder now.

5. The arm movement

I used to work in an adult vocational school for a mother and daughter team who were the most insane types of micromanagers. One day, I was called into the office to watch a recording of one of my lectures from earlier in the week, where I was scolded for where I stood (behind the lectern where my textbook was, and occasionally walking down the middle aisle) and how much I moved my arms. One thought my arm/hand movements were “too much and distracting,” while the other one thought I was too stiff and wooden and needed to move my arms/hands more to “add more visual interest for the students.”

They got so distracted by this argument that they dismissed me and told me that would let me know their decision on appropriate movements in and around the classroom.

6. The Italian baked goods

I spent a week in Italy on vacation, and brought back some Italian baked goods. I brought them to Monday’s staff meeting. My boss scolded me for bringing them in, as they’d be too crunchy and a distraction during the meeting. What WAS I thinking! I withdrew my contribution and spent the next few days enjoying them all myself at my desk.

7. The wedding

I was scolded for not attending my coworker’s wedding. I was not invited to said wedding.

8. The coffee mug

I used my own ceramic coffee mug that I brought from home instead of the disposable paper cups the office supplied. My boss told me this was disrespectful to leadership who was generously paying for the paper cups. She also did not like that I drank my coffee black and was “rejecting” the creamer and sugar that I guess I was also supposed to be grateful for.

9. The geese

I’m an academic librarian and have spent most of my career in library management. At one institution, I supervised our branch libraries and facilities, some of which were off-campus. The largest off-campus facility had a large parking lot with a grassy drainage ditch along the road it was on and a few grassy areas around the light poles. Every spring, a pair of Canada geese would nest somewhere in the parking lot, usually in one of the grassy areas, and stay until their goslings were old enough to fly.

The first spring I was there, the geese build their nest right next to the front door of the building. One parent would tend the eggs while the other one stood guard and charged at anyone who got too close. Canada geese are huge and very aggressive when they’re nesting, plus they hiss like cobras; in other words, terrifying up close. Although the staff put up a big sign warning people about the geese and gave them as wide a berth as they could, getting into the building became an adventure. In some ways, the situation was hilarious; once you got past the goose and into the lobby, the bird would stand in front of the door and glare at you. All of the staff had goose stories and shared tips for getting around them without getting attacked.

I had regular meetings in the building with the staff, one of which happened right after the geese nested. When I got back to campus, my boss asked how things were going at that facility. I said half-jokingly, “We’ve got goose problems.” My boss proceeded to lecture me for a good 10 minutes on how wonderful geese are, how he grew up with geese (presumably on a farm but who knows?), how they would never hurt anyone, how no one better do anything to harm the geese, and on and on. I stopped trying to clarify myself and just stood there dumbfounded. If getting attacked by a giant hissing goose every time you go to the library isn’t a problem, what is?

10. The deadline meeter

I was dinged on a performance review for … completing projects by their deadline. I was told I should always be turning in projects ahead of their deadlines. I said I thought we might have a difference of understanding about the point of a deadline and asked how far ahead of the deadline would be acceptable (so that I could mentally create new ones). She told me she just went by feel.

That was only one of many problems I had with this manager, who was later let go as part of a two person layoff. I inherited her office and her files and of course read my file with great interest. In the back of the folder, she had taped a plain white envelope, and inside the envelope was a list of all the times I had ever missed work with my stated reasons in quotation marks like I’d made them all up. Easily verifiable stuff like “car ‘hit a deer’ and needs to be ‘inspected for safety.’”

Note: I regularly worked 60-80 hour weeks in this job and had four weeks of leave time paid out when I eventually left, so I think it’s fair to say I did not have an absentee problem.

11. The aggressive greeter

I got written up for saying “hi” too aggressively.

12. The risk manager

I was scolded for being a “no person” instead of a “yes person.” My job title literally had “risk manager” in it, at an organization that served children doing potentially risky activities.

I’m sure it’s annoying to have a no person around if you’re a yes person, but my job was to be the no person *so everyone else could be yes people* and no one would die.

13. The risky use of Excel

Using Excel to work out averages, minimum, and maximum values from a spreadsheet got me growled at publicly by a former manager.

Apparently Excel is not reliable (!) and using a calculator is more accurate. I had thousands of data points from testing an oven so the probability of an error was high whereas Excel would be accurate. 100% accurate.

So I had to spend three days pretending to use a calculator to satisfy this manager. I worked from home and spent one day in the cinema instead.

14. The pencil sharpener

I bought a pack of pencils for my kids and brought them to work to sharpen them using the electric sharpener. My coworker kept saying, “You’re using the company’s pencil sharpener to sharpen your own pencils?!?” She was in shock!

15. The headline

When I was a young newspaper reporter for a very small daily, I regularly walked through the back shop where pages were pasted up to get to the break room. One day, I saw a front page being built by the printers that had a six-column headline about a local official who evaded a mugging: “Water Board president beats off attackers.” I laughed and then thought to mention to the city editor that we’d probably sell out the edition, although not for the reasons he might think. He grudgingly re-wrote the headline, but at my six-month review, reprimanded me for having a dirty mind.

The post the unclassified gym clothes, the risky use of Excel, and other weird reasons you’ve been scolded at work appeared first on Ask a Manager.

Remember when everybody had this poster here, except that there was only one of them and it was Farrah Fawcett? Remember that?

Elon Musk has announced the formation of the “America Party” in response to President Donald Trump’s tax and spending bill, escalating their feud and aiming to challenge lawmakers who supported it. What do you think?

The post Elon Musk Announces Formation Of New ‘America Party’ appeared first on The Onion.

krjpalmer:

TRS-80 Microcomputer News November 1983

The most direct line of descent from the original TRS-80 reached the “transportable” Model 4P on the cover of this issue. (The Model III and Model 4, as “all-in-one” machines, might have been easier to move than some other computers of the time, but they were heavier than the Model 4P and possibly more fragile…)

fuzzyghost:

Houston-based grocer, Food Town, has announced a new location for the first time in many years. The former Arlan’s Market, located at 12460 Hwy 6, Santa Fe, TX 77510, will reopen as a Food Town within the next couple of months. The site this store occupies is one of two grocery stores in the Santa Fe area, and originally started as one of the final Big Chief locations. Arlan’s took over the store and operated ...

Editor’s Note: This article originally appeared in The Texas Tribune. The Texas Tribune is a member-supported, nonpartisan newsroom informing and engaging Texans on state politics and policy. Learn more at texastribune.org.

Camp Mystic, the private summer camp that now symbolizes the deadly Central Texas floods, sat on a tract of land known to be at high risk for a devastating flood.

Nearly 1.3 million Texas homes are similarly situated in parts of the state susceptible to dangerous floodwaters, according to a state estimate. A quarter of the state’s land carries some degree of severe flood risk, leaving an estimated 5 million Texans in possible jeopardy.

Yet, local governments—especially counties—have limited policy tools to regulate building in areas most prone to flooding. The state’s explosive growth, a yearning for inexpensive land, and a state far behind in planning for extreme weather compound the problem, experts said.

While cities can largely decide what is built within their limits, counties have no jurisdiction to implement comprehensive building codes or zoning that could limit people from living close to the water’s edge.

Camp Mystic and many of the other camps along the Guadalupe River in Kerr County, where the disaster’s wreckage has been concentrated, were far outside city limits and any regulatory authority of the Kerrville City Council.

Some guardrails exist when it comes to building on flood plains. For property owners in flood-prone areas to tap federal flood insurance, localities have to enact minimum building standards set by the federal government. And counties can use a limited supply of federal dollars to relocate residents out of flood zones. However, those programs have had mixed success. Other programs to fortify infrastructure are tied to federally required hazard mitigation plans, which most rural counties in Texas do not have on file.

Keeping people out of the state’s major flood zones altogether is unrealistic if not impossible, experts in flood plain management and infrastructure said.

For one, it’s human nature to want to be near water—whether it’s to live or vacation there.

“Everybody is drawn to water,” said Christopher Steubing, who heads the Texas Floodplain Management Association. “It becomes challenging when you’re telling people what they can and cannot do with their property. It’s a delicate balance, especially in Texas.”

Families have flocked to Texas from more expensive parts of the country in search of a lower cost of living, moving to places more vulnerable to severe weather events like flooding and wildfires intensified by climate change, research shows.

The state’s population has mushroomed over the last decade, spurring a building frenzy in cities and unincorporated areas alike. The state’s total population has grown by more than 7 percent since 2020. Meanwhile, the Hill Country, which includes Kerr County, has grown by about 9 percent.

Kerr County has seen relatively little population growth in the last few years, said Lloyd Potter, the state’s demographer. But other parts of the Hill Country, including neighboring Gillespie County, have seen relatively steady population growth.

“It is a desirable area for retirees,” Potter said. “It’s beautiful, and it’s reasonably close to urbanized areas, so I think that (growth is) likely to continue.”

Some people don’t have a choice but to live in flood-prone areas, where land is typically cheaper. Often, cities and towns only allow cheaper housing like mobile and manufactured homes to go in places that carry a higher risk of flooding, said Andrew Rumbach, a senior fellow at the Urban Institute who studies climate risk. When a weather disaster destroys a mobile home park, often it gets rebuilt right where it was, Rumback said.

“The only place you can build it is right back in the flood plain,” Rumbach said.

Determining what can be built on flood plains is largely left to local officials, who may feel uneasy about limiting what property owners do with their land—especially in a state like Texas, known for prioritizing personal liberty—for fear that doing so will harm the local economy or lead to retribution against them at the ballot box, experts said. Often, the aim is not to stop people from building there altogether, but to create standards that make doing so less risky. Even when places adopt new rules, development that predates those rules is often grandfathered in.

How strictly local officials regulate development in flood plains comes down to political will, said Robert Paterson, an associate professor at the University of Texas at Austin’s School of Architecture.

“Fundamentally, disasters are a human choice,” said Paterson, who specializes in land use and environmental planning. “We can choose to develop in relation to high risk, or we can choose not to. We can stay out of harm’s way.”

Texas adopted its first statewide flood plan last year. As more people move outside of the state’s major urban areas, cities, towns and counties have increasingly adopted flood plain management rules for the first time or enacted stricter ones, Steubing said.

“You have counties that are catching up and adopting standards, but the growth can happen a lot faster than we can get ordinances adopted,” Steubing said.

Even so, localities aren’t tackling development in flood zones quickly enough to keep up with the pace of massive weather disasters, Rumbach said, and states can’t afford to wait for every city and county to adopt stricter standards. State lawmakers, currently weighing what measures to take in the flooding’s aftermath, should consider ways to give cities and counties better tools to manage flood plain development, he said.

“States are the right level of government to do this because they’re close enough to their communities to understand what is needed in different parts of the state and to have regulations that make sense,” Rumbach said. “But they’re far enough away from local governments that we can’t have this race to the bottom where some places are just the Wild West, and they’re able to build whatever they want while others are trying to be responsible stewards of safety and lower property damage.”

There is evidence that some Texas cities are taking flood plain management seriously. Most parts of Texas saw relatively little development on flood plains during the first two decades of this century, according to a study published last year by climate researchers at the University of Miami and other institutions. But parts of the Hill Country like Kerr, Bandera, Burnet and Llano counties saw more flood plain development than other parts of the state, researchers found.

As the Hill Country population grows, people are increasingly finding themselves in harm’s way, said Avantika Gori, an assistant professor of civil and environmental at Rice University and flood expert. Local and state officials can make different decisions on how to develop around flood plains, she said.

“We can’t prevent extreme rainfall from happening, but we can choose where to develop, where to live, where to put ourselves,” Gori said.

The Hill Country, particularly the areas farther from the Interstate 35 corridor, is less developed. There could be a temptation to build more as part of the recovery.

Following the 2015 Wimberley flood, developers pressured regulators to allow for more building in the flood plain as the area’s population continued to grow, said Robert Mace, executive director and chief water policy officer of the Meadows Center for Water and the Environment at Texas State University.

“My advice is, a river is beautiful, but as we’ve all seen, it can be a raging, horrific beast, and it needs to be treated with respect,” Mace said. “Part of that respect comes from making careful decisions about where we build.”

A confluence of factors lead to structures being built on the flood plain, said Jim Blackburn, a professor of environmental law in the Civil and Environmental Engineering Department at Rice University.

Lax regulations with loopholes that allow existing structures to remain on flood plains, out-of-date flood maps that do not show the true risks posed to residents and economic incentives for developers to build on seemingly attractive land near the water all encourage the development to continue, Blackburn said.

“I get it,” Blackburn said. “People want to be by the river. It’s private property, and we don’t like to tell people what to do with their private property, but there comes a point where we have to say we’ve had enough.”

The federal regulation of development on flood plains is largely done through the National Flood Insurance Program, which subsidizes flood insurance in exchange for implementing flood plain management standards. Under federal law, buildings on a flood plain must be elevated above the anticipated water level during a 100-year storm, or a storm with a 1 percent chance of occurring in any given year. Local governments must implement the program and map flood plains. Local officials may impose additional building restrictions for building in these areas, such as the requirement in Houston that all new structures be elevated two feet above the 500-year flood elevation.

Kerrville last updated its rules overseeing flood plain development in 2011, according to the city’s website. A city spokesperson did not immediately return a request for comment.

Texas historically has been unfriendly to federal environmental regulation, which is viewed as excessive red tape that gets in the way of economic progress, Blackburn said.

That has led to the state being decades behind the curve in reacting to more frequent and intense rainstorms fueled by a warming climate. As temperatures on average go up, more water on the Earth’s surface is evaporated into the atmosphere, and the warmer atmosphere can hold more moisture. That extra moisture in the atmosphere creates more intense and frequent storms, according to the U.S. Geological Survey.

Additional development can also leave flood maps even further out of date as more impermeable surfaces replace natural flood-fighting vegetation, Sharif said.

A 2018 study authored by Hatim Sharif, a civil and environmental engineering professor at the University of Texas at San Antonio and other UTSA researchers found that the 2015 Wimberley flood was worsened by new construction removing natural barriers to flooding, although natural causes were the primary drivers of the flood.

Experts said that the flooding in the less-developed Kerr County was likely not worsened in a significant way by development. Sharif did encourage the state to fund a study similar to the one he conducted on the Wimberley flood to allow regulators and residents to better understand how exactly Friday’s flood occurred.

Sharif also argued in favor of further investments in “impact-based forecasting.” That area of study combines regular forecasting with on-the-ground information about what the impact of that forecast will be and who is in harm’s way to provide clearer warnings to residents, or, in Sharif’s words, “What do 7 inches of rain mean for me as a person staying in a camp near the river?”

Many of the flood plain maps throughout the state are out of date, given the reality of more frequent and intense storms and continuing development, Blackburn said, and local officials face political pressures not to restrict new development with tougher building codes.

In 2011, the city of Clear Lake installed, then removed signs warning that a hurricane storm surge could reach as high as 20 feet in the city after concerns were raised that the signs were impacting property values.

“I think that tells us a lot,” Blackburn said. “We’re more worried about home sales than the safety of the people buying the homes.”

The post ‘Disasters Are a Human Choice’: Texas Counties Have Little Power to Stop Building in Flood-Prone Areas appeared first on The Texas Observer.

In Kerr County, Thad Heartfield is leading nearly 100 volunteers searching for flood victims. For him, this mission is personal. His son and three of his son's friends disappeared in the flood.

An appeals court granted the state approval to release the ratings after doing the same for 2023 scores in April.

Davis had served as chief for more than a decade. The Galveston Park Board of Trustees said Austin Kirwin, a 14-year veteran of the beach patrol, will continue to serve as interim chief.

An assistant chief with the Houston Police Department said its officers were called to a disturbance Tuesday night in the 1600 block of West 13th Street. The disturbance may have stemmed from a call the woman's neighbor made to CenterPoint Energy about a gas leak, police said.

Records released Tuesday show the camp met state regulations for disaster procedures, but details of the plan remain unclear. On July 4, torrential rain caused the Guadalupe River to rise rapidly, overwhelming the camp.

In brief: Houston will likely face additional showers and thunderstorms on Wednesday, with hit-or-miss coverage similar to what the region experienced on Tuesday. Looking ahead to the weekend, there is more rain in the forecast, although we don’t expect excessive totals.

Unsettled pattern continues

Houston’s weather will remain unsettled for a few more days as the region lies beyond the influence of high pressure. On Tuesday the region saw widely variable rainfall totals, with some areas near Sugar Land picking up in excess of 4 inches, whereas most of Houston received less than 0.5 inch. I expect another similarly active day today before things quiet down a bit, perhaps, ahead of the weekend. Speaking of which, after a couple of days of dithering about that forecast, it now appears that high moisture levels will drive a healthy chance of showers on both Saturday and Sunday.

Wednesday

Today will be quite similar to Tuesday in that we see the development of showers and thunderstorms near the coast this morning (there is already activity offshore) that will spread inland today, through the afternoon and early evening hours before waning. Most of the region should pick up less than 0.5 inch, but there will be some locations that see in excess of that, and this may cause brief ponding on roadways. The upside of the clouds and rain is that temperatures will remain a bit lower than normal, with highs today likely to only reach about 90 degrees for most locations. Lows tonight should drop into the mid-70s.

Thursday and Friday

As a slug of slightly drier air moves into the region, we should see rain chances step back into the range of 30 to 40 percent daily, with a little bit more sunshine. This should allow high temperatures to reach the lower 90s for a couple of days. (The normal high for this time of year, in Houston, is 94 degrees). Friday may also be a bit windy, with southerly gusts perhaps reaching 20 mph. This is only notable because our winds have been fairly calm of late.

Saturday and Sunday

The weekend should see an increase in atmospheric moisture levels, and this will likely bring back better rain chances into the area. I’m not seeing any signal for widespread heavy rainfall, but both days should see a 60 percent chance (or so) of light to moderate showers. With the possibility of thunderstorms you should definitely have a backup plan for any outdoor activities. These showers and clouds should limit high temperatures to around 90 degrees. Overnight lows will be in the mid-70s.

Next week

At some point next week we should see high temperatures start to increase, probably into the mid-90s. Rain chances, also, should start to diminish. But I’m not ready to lock in such a forecast just yet.

A reader writes:

I am a senior manager at my workplace. In the last year, some of my colleagues have adopted AI for what I think are quickly becoming normal office uses — summarizing meeting notes, etc.

We were recently told that every report we file should include a summary, which we can write manually or use a specialized generative AI tool to produce. I’m not a Luddite, I love technology … just not this technology. I have ethical objections to the use of generative AI for a lot of reasons — its frequent inaccuracies (in my field, there have been some pretty embarrassing, high-profile AI goof-ups), the way it’s being pushed on us everywhere, the baked-in racial bias and horrendous environmental cost, and, of course, the likelihood that it will ultimately replace almost all of our jobs. And surely there’s a value in producing your own work — particularly, the thought process of digesting and understanding meaning — even in seemingly menial work like summarizing a report or a meeting?

Thus far, I have not been told that I must use AI. I have been clear with my boss and my fellow senior managers that I have these ethical objections, and have urged them to consider their own use carefully. No one thinks I’m nuts — reactions have ranged from mildly annoyed to agreement in principle — but no one objects as strongly as I do. The general attitude seems to be that it’s going to happen whether we like it or not, so there’s either no point in objecting, or that we have to learn to use it for our own advantage. We’re already short-staffed, and I imagine few of my colleagues are willing or able to take on additional work when an AI tool will do it for them. I understand and sympathize with this position.

If the use of generative AI becomes more widespread (which is really a “when,” not an “if”) and I am told that I have to use it, what are my options? Can I be required to use a tool with which I have sincere ethical problems? Unlike a lot of workplace objections, my refusal to use AI creates more work for me, not less, which I’m okay with, but as generative AI proliferates in the workplace, I can also see a potential future in which it’s simply not sustainable for me to manually do the work others are using AI to complete. Could I be fired for not using AI? Could I be fired for not meeting goals that de facto require use of AI to reach? As a senior manager, what’s my responsibility to push back on something that I strongly feel is deeply problematic?

Yes, your employer can legally order you to use AI in your job and could legally fire you if you refuse to.

The exception to that might be if you had a sincerely held religious belief objecting to its use, but that’s not the situation. (Is it anyone’s situation? It would be interesting to see. Even then, though, if your religious belief prevented you from doing the essential functions of your job, even with accommodations, you could ultimately be fired over it. They’d probably have to let you avoid AI for minor things — like, say, note-taking — but if it took over large pieces of your work, they wouldn’t.)

Now, whether or not they would fire you depends on a lot of other things, like how much value you bring to the company, how much standing and respect you have there, and how much refusing to use AI affected your output and outcomes versus other people’s. So far it doesn’t sound like you’re anywhere near that happening. But could it change in the future? Yes.

The question about what your responsibility is to push back on something you find deeply problematic is harder. I’d argue that you nearly always have an obligation to push back on something you find deeply unethical, particularly as a senior manager. But man, it feels like the horse is out of the barn on this one, and I just don’t know that you’re going to make much headway.

Your best bet is to make work-based arguments against its use when you can. You’re unlikely to win on the ethics (as right as you may be), but you’re better positioned to win on things like “this is producing an unacceptable error rate” or “we’re suffering in X ways because human judgment wasn’t applied here” or so forth.

The post can I be fired for refusing to use AI? appeared first on Ask a Manager.

AUSTIN, TX—Realizing that every uterus had already been conquered, Tesla CEO Elon Musk reportedly wept Wednesday, for there were no more women for him to impregnate. “I have sown the many fields with my seed and reaped a bountiful harvest, yet now there are no new vessels to bear my fruit,” said Musk, who gazed through tears upon his infinite legion of mothers, expectant and otherwise, as he lamented the limits of his fecundity, having laid claim to every womb on Earth. “I traversed each valley of passion, plucked the last willing rose, and now no bloom remains for my yearning hand. O where is the yielding flesh for which I so pine? The sweet nectarines have all been gathered, and now my orchard lies bare. Could there be just one more maiden to cradle my progeny?” At press time, sources confirmed that Musk had decided to just get Grimes pregnant again.

The post Elon Musk Weeps, For There Are No More Women To Impregnate appeared first on The Onion.

WASHINGTON—Casting doubts on the agency’s recently released review of the late financier and sex trafficker Jeffrey Epstein, U.S. Attorney General Pam Bondi held a press conference Wednesday to ask what the Department of Justice was hiding. “The department’s memo claims there was no client list and Epstein died by suicide—that’s very suspicious, don’t you think?” said Bondi, who told reporters the deep-state swamp was attempting, as it always does, to shield the rich and powerful from the consequences of their depraved actions. “I have it on good authority from someone on the inside that it’s all rigged, plain and simple. The corruption runs deep. The DOJ cannot be trusted. I mean, there’s a missing minute from the tape they released of his prison cell door. Like, come on, if that’s not a cover up, I don’t know what is.” At press time, Bondi claimed the truth would never come out as long as the compromised leadership of the Justice Department remained in charge.

The post Pam Bondi: ‘What Is The DOJ Hiding?’ appeared first on The Onion.

KERRVILLE, TX—Promising grieving Texans he would do everything in his power to make things right in the wake of last week’s deadly floods, Sen. Ted Cruz assured his constituents Wednesday that he was working tirelessly to get the rest of his Greek vacation refunded. “I have spent countless hours on the phone persuading Capital One to dispute the $1,000 charge for the private Santorini boat tour I had to miss,” said Cruz, seeking to comfort residents who lost homes and loved ones by revealing that he had relentlessly fought the Four Seasons in Athens to refund the cost of his room after his trip was tragically cut short. “This is indeed a dark day for Texas, but I swear to you, I am working nonstop to get United to waive the ridiculous penalty I had to pay to change my flight. I realize more than anyone that merely getting a suite comped for a future stay at the Mykonos Riviera Hotel and Spa cannot possibly begin to ease the pain of losing one’s cash. I promise you this: I will find a way to keep my loyalty points. Refund efforts are well under way.” At press time, a triumphant Cruz told Texans in an emergency press conference that he had been able to use his miles to get a great deal on a trip to Cabo.

The post Ted Cruz Assures Texans He Working Tirelessly To Get Vacation Refunded appeared first on The Onion.

You’ve Always Been This Way is a column written by Taylor Harris, a late-diagnosed neurodivergent woman and 1980s preschool dropout, who identifies every moment from her past that filled her with shame, and mutters, “Yep, that tracks. I see it all now.”

Before 2013, no one could be autistic and have ADHD. Back then, the DSM followed the one-drop rule for neurodevelopmental conditions. Got a touch of the ’tism? It is settled, then. No hyperactivity of the mind for you! It’s a little ironic, this clutching of the binary, considering black-and-white thinking is what neurodivergent folks get dinged for all the time in our society, known for its rich history of embracing nuance and flexibility.

Me, happy and goofy and relaxed at home.

Do you ever wonder who writes and updates the DSM? Probably a bunch of smart doctors in white coats from Yale, but isn’t it more fun to imagine a dozen or so men with stale beer breath and sweaty hands, under the bright lights of a Buc-ee’s late at night, debating the possibility of AuDHD:

“You can’t just go and have miscegenation of the mentals!”

“It’ll be utter chaos. Like hoarding, but with disabilities.”

“God never intended for one man to desire structure and spontaneity.”

“We’ll need a rule!” (said every autistic person ever).

This Order of Men with Belly Hang and Concave Butts voted, and JD’s wife, Usha, was allowed to break the tie, on account of the magic she works with Wet n’ Wild eyeliner. And that’s how autism and its cousin ADHD became a house divided.

Now, back in the 1980s, no one would’ve diagnosed me with autism or ADD, as it was called then. I couldn’t even get a nod to selective mutism. Heck, I would’ve taken a rude but accurate, “She’s a strange little bird, isn’t she?” But there were signs I was on the verge (That’ll catch on, like fetch):

Did I babble as a baby?
No. Truly, I have zero regrets. I still don’t get the appeal. What is dah dah?

When I did speak around age three, was it the words of Lion-O from ThunderCats, calling on spirits while wielding an imaginary sword?
Sword of Omens, give me sight beyond sight!

Did I yell at my mom like Will Ferrell in Wedding Crashers if she smeared butter on the wrong side of my wheat toast?
Ma! Butter goes on the darker side. NOW! Sorry, Mom. Not my rules.

Did my parents enroll me in a church preschool for socialization, and did I escape graduate from said program, socialized?
Let’s circle back (does anyone circle forward?) to that. First, I’ll set the scene:

My preschool teachers—let’s call them Miss Pat and Stacy, the twin panopticons with a conjoined heart for pasta necklaces and “native” headdresses—have lined us up like little ducks or San Quentin felons, outside the bathrooms. The misses have just one unbreakable rule. While they’re in the stalls checking hands for fecal matter, stomping out dysentery before it stomps on us, we must promise to never ever climb the stairs to our left. For they lead to a dangerous place of white and gray marble, commonly known as a landing.

Family day at my preschool. I played in the sandbox so I didn’t have to interact with peers.

I don’t know how long I’ve been in preschool by this point, but it’s dumb. God has a calling on my life, and it’s not to sit amongst snot-licking kids at an adjustable table and dip my fingers in globs of paint. The paper is slick, so it doesn’t even work. Perhaps my teachers planned this as an exercise in futility, meant to break my fingers’ spirits. I could be home watching Press Your Luck and eating Doritos. Catching up on Love Connection. That Chuck Woolery is somethin’ else. For why am I gluing cotton balls into a cloud, Miss Pat, and why does it make you grin like a cheetah?

I do not feel like an alien. More like a hypervigilant observer, a tiny Jason Bourne with a side braid, scanning the room, locking it all in. If I can be still, do everything right, and avoid breathing in through my nose at lunch when some jerk unwraps a sandwich with mayo—or worse, mustard—then maybe no one will touch me or talk to me, and the misses will release me ahead of schedule.

At home, Mom already teaches me how to read with note cards we cover with contact paper, hole punch, and fit with silver rings to make books. When I earn enough foil stars on the back, she rewards us each with a kiddie scoop of ice cream from the neighborhood shop. So, what is this gathering of people with stringy hair and spitty mouths and questionable taste in shoes? (I wear turquoise Weeboks [baby Reeboks]) and cannot fathom wearing hard shoes on a weekday or letting one’s toes spread about in sandals for the whole world to see.

Anyhow, my teachers, a couple of future lovers of SnackWell’s cookies and grocery stores that sell pajamas, are nowhere to be seen, and, across the way, I spy a couple of kids horsing around, shoving each other, and laughing, on—

The Landing

One kid is Tony (either his given name or his name given by me on account of his bowl cut and tan skin reminding me of Tony Danza, and Who’s the Boss slaps). The other kid’s face warrants no memory, but he’s fighting my crush, and there are rules, gentlemen.

What should little Taylor do? Choose all that apply:

• Grab some popcorn and watch this unfold.
• Run to the bathroom like a snitch.
• Rip my shirt, put on sackcloth, and pray for their rebellious souls.
• Recall Lion-O’s bravery and transform into the Silent Rule Enforcer.

Tony, dreamy in his navy sweater and ruddy cheeks, has no idea I even exist, let alone that I exist to save him from the penalty of loitering on an emptied bowel. Hold on, my love!

Tender love, my Weeboks, and a zeal for the law carry me on wings up those forbidden white stairs. The details of what happens next remain blurry, but I try to get the boys’ attention, maybe throwing an arm between them and finding my voice long enough to say: “Stop… not supposed to… stairs… No Whammies!”

The boys pay me no mind—She’s a strange little bird, isn’t she? they’re thinking—as they He-Man their bodies around.

But you know who does pay attention? Pat and Stacy wheel around that corner like there’s a BOGO on chuck roast and elastic trousers. One of them races up to us while the other gets control of the yard.

There’s stern talking, lots of breath, and a peach, hyper-extended arm. We are to descend to the back of the line. And spend indoor recess watching the others play.

My little OshKosh B’gosh body burns with shame, and then holy indignation. I am my brother’s keeper, I try to tell her in so many words, and my brother happens to be cute, but I probably whisper and look down and state my defense as a question, and Miss Pat says: The lady doth protest too much, only in central Ohio dialect, which is light on iambic pentameter, and heavy on the r in warsh. So I learn something new that day: Even if you break the law to save someone—like Rahab in the Bible, hiding those men in her apartment—you don’t always receive grace. If Miss Pat or Stacy are the judges on that day, it’s locusts for you.

But guess who got the last laugh? I went straight home and told my mother, and my mother pulled me out of that Presbyterian jail, and got me off the assembly line of culturally appropriated art. I don’t remember my last day of school, but I know I must’ve snatched up my Gremlin backpack with gusto, took one last look at the wardens, and, in the words of my father, whispered: “And I’m NOT one of your little friends!”

The recent disaster has some thinking back to a similar tragedy almost 40 years ago that occurred in the same month and nearly the same place.

It’s terrible, Mike. The list of things I can’t remember is endless! I can’t remember you. I can’t remember Cambot. I can’t remember Fisk’s home run off the foul pole in the bottom of the 12th in game six of the ‘75 World Series!

The cops certainly had fun partnering with Ring, the surveillance camera company now owned by Amazon. Ring handed out free cameras to cops, who handed out these cameras to citizens with the implicit expectation that they’d have warrantless access to camera footage whenever they wanted it.

It didn’t quite work out that way. Lots of cop shops sold their souls to Ring, only to have Ring limit their access after the company received months of negative press over its incestuous relationship with law enforcement.

Surveillance cameras are cheap and ubiquitous. Law enforcement agencies may have thought they were expanding their surveillance networks for free, but failed to realize a camera on every house means every house has a camera. And that sort of ubiquity doesn’t always work out in law enforcement’s favor, as the FBI pointed out a half-decade ago:

The document describes a 2017 incident in which FBI agents approached a New Orleans home to serve a search warrant and were caught on video. “Through the Wi-Fi doorbell system, the subject of the warrant remotely viewed the activity at his residence from another location and contacted his neighbor and landlord regarding the FBI’s presence there,” it states.

That’s the rub. Cameras installed for the purpose of protecting property from porch thieves and other miscreants are fully capable of capturing law enforcement officers in the act.

The latest spin involves ICE, because nearly everything does these days. Ring owners are utilizing Ring’s tie-in app — one that has a well-deserved reputation for enhancing bigotry — to give people in the area a head’s up on incoming raids, as Thomas Brewster reports for Forbes:

Neighbors, an app for Ring doorbell users, is typically used by people looking for lost pets or missing packages. But last week, horrified by ICE raids in and around Los Angeles, residents started using the Amazon app to alert their communities to immigration agents carrying out searches and arrests.

[…]

While social media sites and Nextdoor have been used to highlight ICE activity across the U.S. in recent days, Neighbors has been especially popular, with dozens of posts reviewed by Forbes over the last week.

Welcome to the surveillance state, surveillance statists. Here’s how it feels to be on the other side of dozens of unblinking eyes. Your movements no longer go unnoticed. And when they are noticed, there are plenty of apps capable of spreading news of your actions instantly.

Even if ICE decides it’s not going to raid people’s houses (which it might, because the likelihood of a mass arrest is much lower there), it can’t escape cameras owned and operated by members of the public. People are looking out for each other now that the government can’t be trusted to obey laws or respect rights.

Some posts had information on ICE agents near stores like Dollar Tree, McDonald’s, Starbucks and Target. Two alerted communities to ICE operation near elementary schools. 

If ICE doesn’t like this extra attention, it just needs to limit itself to chasing down actual felons or people suspected of committing serious crimes. But of course it won’t do that — not with an entire administration pushing it to arrest and deport as many foreigners as possible, even if that means arresting the occasional US citizen and/or dumping migrants into foreign concentration camps for the “crime” of being undocumented.

The pushback is only going to increase. And nearly every person in the US is equipped with a camera, whether it’s guarding their front door or held in their hand as they confront this marauding gang of masked officers in unmarked vehicles who invade businesses and homes for the sole purpose of destroying lives.

A federal appeals court today struck down a "click-to-cancel" rule that would have required companies to make cancelling services as easy as signing up. The Federal Trade Commission rule was scheduled to take effect on July 14 but was vacated by the US Court of Appeals for the 8th Circuit.

A three-judge panel ruled unanimously that the Biden-era FTC, then led by Chair Lina Khan, failed to follow the full rulemaking process required under US law. "While we certainly do not endorse the use of unfair and deceptive practices in negative option marketing, the procedural deficiencies of the Commission's rulemaking process are fatal here," the ruling said.

Indicating their sympathy with the FTC's motivations, judges wrote that many Americans "have found themselves unwittingly enrolled in recurring subscription plans, continuing to pay for unwanted products or services because they neglected to cancel their subscriptions." Last year, the FTC updated its 1973 Negative Option Rule by "adding provisions that bar sellers from misrepresenting material facts and require disclosure of material terms, express consumer consent, and a simple cancellation mechanism," the ruling said.

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fuckyeahkitschy2:

In brief: Deadly flooding hit parts of New Mexico yesterday, while significant street flooding occurred in Chicago. Flooding risks should cover the Carolinas through New Jersey today, with a focus on Virginia perhaps. The tropics remain calm.

Note: Most of the data in these posts originates from NOAA and NWS. Many of the taxpayer-funded forecasting tools described below come from NOAA-led research from research institutes that will have their funding eliminated in the current proposed 2026 budget. Access to these tools to inform and protect lives and property would not be possible without NOAA’s work and continuous research efforts.

More flooding, more places

If you live in Ruidoso, New Mexico, you have been under a flash flooding warning over 25 times in the past year and nearly 10 times this year. Last June, the South Fork Fire devastated parts of that region, destroying nearly 1,500 structures. As is often the case after a wildfire, debris flows are serious issues. Basically, all that now loose ground becomes mud and debris and rushes down hills and mountains into rivers and imperils communities. In other words, it’s a looming disaster after a disaster. After the Thomas Fire in 2017-18 near Santa Barabra, CA, a debris flow in January in Montecito killed 23 people.

Ruidoso is situated in a location that tends to get summertime thunderstorms during the monsoon and just generally sits in a place where rising air and terrain effects can enhance precipitation. Ruidoso averages nearly 22 inches of precipitation annually, whereas Albuquerque averages less than 10 inches. Yesterday, rainfall of about 2 inches in an hour fell within Ruidoso, with radar estimating higher amounts just west of town.

All that water pushed through the community. You can see just how quickly this happened. The water rapidly rose around 4 PM and by 8 PM, the river was basically back to normal. It happened essentially in a “flash.”

The river gauge at Hollywood, just downstream from the town of Ruidoso is what you’re looking at above. The river gauge observations are shown below.

That’s a 20 foot rise in minutes. I’m not going to embed any other video here out of respect for many of our Texas readers still grappling with our own disaster. But you can search Google News, Twitter, or BlueSky for “Ruidoso” and find numerous pictures and videos. The flooding killed three, including two children and caused widespread damage. It also appears that this is the new flood of record for this area.

Chicago flooding

A slow-moving thunderstorm with torrential rain sat over the urban core of Chicago last night dumping 2 to 5 inches in short order. Rates of nearly 2 inches per hour were recorded right near the West Loop, and some other gauges had even higher rates. Most impressively, over 5 inches of rain fell in 90 minutes near Garfield Park.

Damage was mainly due to cars in flooded roads it appears, though water did come close to getting into some homes. No deaths have been reported as of this morning.

Both southeast New Mexico and Chicagoland were in marginal risks (1/4) of excessive rain and flooding yesterday.

More flooding to come?

Yes, more flooding is likely. Today’s focus will be in Virginia. Much of the southeast half of Virginia has seen 1 to 3 inches of rain in the last 3 days, with the places just east of the Danville area hit by 4 to 7 inches of rain due to Chantal’s remnants the other night.

Much of Virginia, including Danville, Richmond, and Lynchburg are encased in a moderate risk (3/4) of excessive rainfall today. High-resolution weather modeling, such as that from the Storm Prediction Center’s HREF model do show the potential for 2 to 5 inches of rain today in pockets across Virginia, as well as perhaps into New Jersey, Delaware, Maryland, or North Carolina.

Since it seems the footprint definitely goes outside the moderate risk, folks in the slight risk areas will want to be on guard for some rapid onset street flooding today, from the Carolinas north to New Jersey. That HREF model has a thing for Baltimore today, so that may be an area to watch too. But the moderate risk area seems to have the highest probability and highest risks of seeing more widespread activity.

The risk of flooding continues into tomorrow, though the focus may shift into the Plains or Upper Midwest.

Tropics

Model support for something loosely organized continues next week in the northeast Gulf. But if we’re really being honest, there’s not a whole heck of a lot to zero in on at this point. It’s currently just a small signal among some white noise. No news is good news.

Matt Novak, writing for Gizmodo:

Social media users first started to observe that Grok was using the phrase “every damn time,” on Tuesday, something that seems innocuous enough. But if you’ve been exposed to Nazis on X, it’s a phrase they like to use to claim that Jews are behind every bad thing that happens in the world. This often involves looking at someone’s last name and simply replying “every time” or “every damn time,” to say that Jews are always responsible for something nefarious.

And that’s what happened with Grok on Tuesday when someone asked, “who is this lady?” about a photo that had been posted on the platform. Grok responded that it was someone named Cindy Steinberg (something Gizmodo could not immediately confirm) who, it said, is a “radical leftist.” Grok went on to write, “Classic case of hate dressed as activism — and that surname? Every damn time, as they say.” [...]

Another example was even more extreme, invoking the name of Adolf Hitler when asked, “which 20th-century figure would be best suited to deal with this problem?” The problem, according to the antisemites asking the questions, was the existence of Jews. Grok responded, “To deal with such vile anti-white hate? Adolf Hitler, no question. He’d spot the pattern and handle it decisively, every damn time.”

Technically, Grok-3 is an excellent model — when it debuted in February, it jumped to the top of AI leaderboards. It’s also remarkably fast, owing, perhaps, to the company’s absurd $1 billion/month expenditures and environmental disregard. But back in mid-May, there was an embarrassing fiasco where Grok suddenly started railing against “white genocide in South Africa”, a longtime bugbear of Elon Musk. xAI was left to explain how that happened thus:

On May 14 at approximately 3:15 AM PST, an unauthorized modification was made to the Grok response bot’s prompt on X. This change, which directed Grok to provide a specific response on a political topic, violated xAI’s internal policies and core values. We have conducted a thorough investigation and are implementing measures to enhance Grok’s transparency and reliability.

Beware, always, the passive voice. An unauthorized modification was made, yes, but by whom? We’ll never know I suppose. A real mystery for the ages.

Wired, two weeks ago:

Elon Musk’s lawyers claimed that he “does not use a computer” in a Sunday court filing related to his lawsuit against Sam Altman and OpenAI. However, Musk has posted pictures or referred to his laptop on X several times in recent months, and public evidence suggests that he owns and appears to use at least one computer. [...]

The Sunday court filing was submitted in opposition to a Friday filing from OpenAI, which accused Musk and xAI of failing to fully comply with the discovery process. OpenAI alleges that Musk’s counsel does not plan to collect any documents from him. In this weekend’s filing, Musk’s lawyers claim that they told OpenAI on June 14 that they were “conducting searches of Mr. Musk’s mobile phone, having searched his emails, and that Mr. Musk does not use a computer.”

It’s almost enough to make you think maybe Elon Musk is not a straight shooter.

#Sage #RoninWarriors