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22 Dec 06:32

neil-gaiman: On the list of things ABSOLUTELY NOBODY HAS EVER...



neil-gaiman:

On the list of things ABSOLUTELY NOBODY HAS EVER ASKED ME FOR. Here’s the dialogue from the TV show that the Young family are watching in Episode 3, before Adam heads off for an early night.

From 2019. I just ran across this on the hard drive looking for something else, and wondered if it had ever been posted anywhere…

21 Dec 07:42

Argh.

shrimpyzyhands:

The beautiful creation I have made <3

Argh.

17 Dec 03:44

do any other gomens fans end up in a situation where you have to explain gomens to someone who…

dduane:

phoen1xr0se:

neil-gaiman:

fallen-starmaker:

do any other gomens fans end up in a situation where you have to explain gomens to someone who doesn’t know jack shit about it and are faced with the reality that you have no fucking clue how to explain the shitshow that your brain has become

Sorry.

Narrator/God: He was not, in fact, sorry.

(chuckle)

09 Dec 21:15

Hello Neil! I have seen Good Omens several times and I had a question about whether the girls from Edinburgh were a couple or not, since I saw them very close but it is not clear to me since according to me they do not say it at any time, thank you

It's astonishing how often couples don't look at the camera and say "for purposes of clarity we actually are a couple" in real life or in drama. Things like that are often left up to the viewer to figure out.

09 Dec 09:04

Gremlins? Die Hard? The Shining? Deep Throat? All Christmas movies.

by Jessica Hagy
Tomfhaines

Desk Set!

07 Dec 08:10

random-weirdo: the-rainbow-suit-dude: Aft...

random-weirdo:

the-rainbow-suit-dude:

After I watched Good Omens whenever I go to hotels I always look for bibles just to make this joke. My family and friends hate me.

03 Dec 22:10

Hello Neil, how do you feel about being 4th in the tumblr review 2023?

Tomfhaines

I'm sure there are some fans that would agree with Neil here...

I suspect there are worse places to be than sandwiched between David Tennant and Michael Sheen.

29 Nov 21:52

damn ok lake superior

songsofwaterandnight:

huffylemon:

damn ok lake superior

Ok yeah that lake is superior

26 Nov 10:12

What is your take on people writing fanfiction? Have they got anything right that might happen to Crowley and Aziraphale in season 3?

Funny you should ask me that. As an obsessive reader of Good Omens Season 3 fanfiction I was amazed to see how much they have right including:

Sadie and Dottie's boarding home for indigent chinchillas.

Crowley's sad death after eating too many pies.

Who stole Mr Wimble's Magic Hat (how they got this one I will never know).

Why Aziraphale wasn't in the gorilla suit, and also

The Herring Problem.

Frankly I'm not sure why we're even going to make Season 3 any more. You people are already so far ahead of us. Although I suppose that the pies were a bit obvious.

26 Nov 10:12

friend just told me “neil gaiman’s tumblr isn’t real” opinions?

Nothing on Tumblr is real. Tumblr isn't real. And I'm definitely not real. Except that my right knee hurts. So it's probably a bit real.

18 Nov 12:03

dduane: odonata523:odonata523:Male Scifi and Fantasy writers: Look at this !Strong! female...

dduane:

odonata523:

odonata523:

Male Scifi and Fantasy writers: Look at this !Strong! female character! She can fight and solve puzzles, and ends up with the sidekick not the hero! Isn’t she a great character?

Everyone: No, she’s one-dimensional and still only exists to please the hero’s ego

Male scifi and fantasy writers: You’re never happy! This is how characters are written! Besides, it’s much harder for us to write women because we are men!

Terry Pratchett: *creates a female character who is literally the embodyment of a dog, sets her up to be the love interest of Protagonist Hero Man.* *writes her as clever, emotionally tortured, lonely and powerful* *uses her to explore difficulties of bisexuality and masculine dominated workforces*

Terry Pratchett: *Creates a pair of old witches, one of whom is a virgin and the other who has slept with lots of men.* *makes them best friends, never dismisses one lifestyle of the other, explains lifestyle choices based on characters history and personality, uses this to develop each character as the books progress*

Terry Pratchett: *Writes Sybil Rankin* *makes the powerful rich lady heavy set but beautiful, never plays her by her looks, develops her as she ages, acknowledges the way society views such people and then spits on their attitudes* *does it again with Agnes*

Terry Pratchett: *Writes a book about an entire army secretly being women, creates complex female relationships, introduces same sex relationships completely naturally*

Terry Pratchett: *takes old joke about female dwarves and uses it to explore gender identity without making it seem forced or unnatural, carefully discusses some of the issues and complextities whilst still making funny and witty observasions and maintaining genuine fantasy tropes*

Terry Pratchett: *DOES THIS ALL OVER AND OVER AGAIN, DEVELOPING CHARACTERS AS HIS VEIW OF THE WORLD DEVELOPS AND CAREFULLY APOLOGIZES FOR EARLY MISTAKES*

Excellent note by @spiderleggedhorse

Terry’s writer superpower was always Thinking Things Through. All the way through.

17 Nov 10:36

It’s SO good. The Dead Boy Detectives starts in 2024 on Netflix. It’s funny and smart and so good.

It’s SO good. The Dead Boy Detectives starts in 2024 on Netflix. It’s funny and smart and so good.

(Also, it’s absolutely part of the Sandman universe. You’ll see.)

17 Nov 10:34

Mr. Neil, I have a question for you regarding the third season of the series Good Omens, I have heard that supposedly the angel Aziraphale will be a villain in the series, is this true??? I have a lot of concern and fear as well, I hope for your prompt response to my question.

Everything you've heard about Season 3 of Good Omens is always true, because if there's one thing we love doing on Good Omens, it's telling everyone the plot years ahead of time.

Aziraphale will be a villain called The Snaffler, a costumed super-thief out to steal the famed Jet Jaguar diamond in order to power his world-destroying laser beam gun. Only his wife the lovely and hilarious Sadie, a bumbling Spanish Police Inspector with a moustache, and a man in a gorilla suit stand between him and his goal.

31 Oct 21:05

Reading a Terry Pratchett book is literally just: Here’s a funny little joke Here’s something that…

zanebow:

Reading a Terry Pratchett book is literally just:

Here’s a funny little joke
Here’s something that you can tell is a joke but don’t get and will only figure out five years later
Here’s a surprisingly cool fantasy concept
Here’s a unique and well written simile
Here’s a lil guy
Here’s something that has aged depressingly well into the modern day
Here’s something that has aged remarkably queer into the modern day
Here’s a character that you can barely understand what he’s saying
Here is the most terrifying and deeply disturbing concept you have ever heard, casually mentioned
Here is the dumbest fucking pun you’ve ever heard but in the best way
Here is a quote so profound that it makes you view morality and the world in a different way
Here is a plot twist that you can’t tell if it’s genius or stupid
Congratulations! You’ve finished the book! It has fundamentally changed you as a person and you will never be the same!

27 Oct 22:41

tbh shoutout to the over 40s on tumblr, sorry the internet acts like yall belong in the retirement…

durnesque-esque:

ordinarytalk:

redstonedust:

tbh shoutout to the over 40s on tumblr, sorry the internet acts like yall belong in the retirement home when ur literally just regular adults with hobbies

I was going to leave comments in the tags, but I decided this was important enough to put on main.

In college, my friend group collectively got into the SCA - Society for Creative Anachronism. They’re the people who get really into medieval reenactment, the fighting and crafts and cooking, they have kings and queens and knights and events and a good percentage of them (but not all!) work or have worked at Ren Faires.

I am forever grateful my friends dragged me into that, because it was my first introduction to fandom in older adults. Middle-aged dorks. Elderly nerds. Absolutely as intense and weird and hilarious and fun as any fan in their teens or 20s. I started getting into fandom already knowing there was a road ahead for me as I got older, full of handmade costumes and late night movies and shelves of pewter dragon goblets and mixed-aged road trips to meet ups and conventions.

And it kills me that so many people don’t know that sort of community even exists. On both sides, even! I went to Philcon a few years ago, which tends towards older fans, and an older woman I was talking to sadly told me that she thought fandom was dying out, because she never saw younger fans any more.

Over the past decade, there’s been a really toxic movement towards keeping different ages strictly separated, both in and outside of fandom. There’s this strong implication that if an older person wants to interact with a younger person, there is something inherently predatory about that.

Yeah, that attitude sucks. That drive towards separation and puritanism sucks. Declaring that younger people should have nothing to look forward to and that older people should stay separated and lonely sucks. It sucks and we are all worse for it.

Don’t fear age. Don’t put an age limit on having fun. Give yourself a damn future.

Beverly passed away in 2019, but she was one of many of my favorite, elder cosplayers that frequent DragonCon and remind all of us to keep playing as long as we can.

27 Oct 22:40

not100bees:darkpaladin:sepiachord:With Winnie-the-Pooh and The...



not100bees:

darkpaladin:

sepiachord:

With Winnie-the-Pooh and The Battle of Hastings sharing an anniversary today, did you know that E. H. Shepard once drew this amazing scene for an exclusive book bag?

I love that none of them have weapons. Except Kanga, who has a fucking morningstar.

that is roo

26 Oct 08:05

My latest cartoon for New Scientis. Lots more here.

myjetpack:

Two small figures walk through a huge, overgrown forest. 

One of them says “The rewilding project has exceeded all of our expectations!"
They walk further and the figure continues "Keep your eyes open for the species that have come back: red deer, wild boar, pine marten, or perhaps our proudest return: The great old one YOG DRATH'LL, eternal unsleeping evil of the primordial forest.”

Sure enough, hidden amongst the trees are various animals and, in the deepest forest, a monstrous thing: its nebulous body bestrewn with cruel, lifeless eyes, it's formless maw gaping horribly, and its writhing tentacles reaching hungrily forth, feeling for living things to drag back to its awful cthonic lair.ALT

My latest cartoon for New Scientis. Lots more here.

20 Oct 07:12

dr-otter: animatedamerican: impling: curl...

dr-otter:

animatedamerican:

impling:

curliestofcrowns:

smartgrrrl:

I’ve been thinking about this daily since it crossed my dash

little mans is 100% correct.

I’m gonna put I AM BRAVE OF THIS MEETING on my cubicle wall at work and never explain it.

Think about the donuts of your day!

15 Oct 21:31

Is Crowley gonna “go evil” in season 3, or is he going to be a miserable little dude

Tomfhaines

More Gaiman snark!

Good Omens Season 3 opens with Crowley's wedding to Sadie. They make love passionately behind a screen for the rest of episode 1 while people dressed as enormous rabbits bring them jam sandwiches, and talk about the weather. Then Crowley gets eaten by goats and dies, and we never find out if he would have been good or evil, happy or sad, or indeed if he would have had anything else to do in Season 3. It will be frustrating for the audience, but very artistic.

10 Oct 21:25

dduane: atlinmerrick:(Will never not reblog this beauty. What...



dduane:

atlinmerrick:

(Will never not reblog this beauty. What genius.)

Same. :)

10 Oct 13:04

I’ve added five new limited edition prints to the shop at www.tomgauld.com/shop. This is one of…

myjetpack:

A signed and numbered print of the following cartoon:
Night.
A child reads under the covers with a torch.
Father: Ok, buddy. Time to stop reading.
Child: Why?
Father: we all like spending time in a fantasy world, but we need to sleep so that tomorrow we can go out and confront all the challenges that the real world throws at us. 
Child: Tomorrow sounds a lot less fun than staying up late reading a book.
CUT TO
They are both reading under the covers with the torch.ALT

I’ve added five new limited edition prints to the shop at www.tomgauld.com/shop. This is one of them.

08 Oct 22:11

A friend of mine sent me a video of that time you performed Science Fiction Double Feature from Rocky Horror on Craig Ferguson. How on *Earth* did you manage to not laugh during that?

That was the third take. Someone who was me messed up the first two.

danadaria:

For those who are curious

08 Oct 22:01

This is one of the new, limited edition prints I’ve made. Get them now at www.tomgauld.com/shop

myjetpack:

A two panel comic stip. Panel one is labelled "School Parents' night" and is a picture of a small red-haired girl sitting with her parents as a teacher holds up apiece of paper with an F on it. Panel two is labelled "astronomy conference" and shows a red-haired young woman being awarded a medal proudly watched by her parents. The teacher and the medal bestower both share a speech bubble which reads "This is for spending all your time staring into space.ALT

This is one of the new, limited edition prints I’ve made. Get them now at www.tomgauld.com/shop

05 Oct 07:45

I like haunted houses in theory BUT I have no idea how to react when the actors speak to you. They…

worldheritagepostorganization:

lizbizonly:

sun-flowers-sam:

thefingerfuckingfemalefury:

under-the-arch:

imanicepersoniswear:

sympathetic-deceit-trash:

splinterdirk:

batsalmighty:

schmergo:

puerto-nic0:

glumshoe:

glumshoe:

glumshoe:

I like haunted houses in theory BUT I have no idea how to react when the actors speak to you. They ask me a question and I just… answer it…

The scariest part of a haunted house is the unscripted social interaction.

Scary nurse in a creepy voice: “Do you have an appointment to see the doctor?”

Me: “Uh. Do you accept walk-ins?”

Scary farmer: “I like to kill people!”

My friend, brightly: “I like to die!”

Zombie : “AARRRGH”

Me : “Do you get dental insurance?”

Zombie : “TEETH!!”

This happened to me.

Scary prison dude: HELLO

Me: Nice to meet you!

Him: (pause) No it’s noooooot

My worst horror house experience was when I couldn’t find the (rather obvious) exit and the guy chasing me with a chainsaw stopped, sighed and pointed me to the exit, saying “please scream as loud as you can when you run out there” and just left. I disappointed the horror house chainsaw dude and I will never get over that

Guy: They are all my friends.. (motioning to hanging corpses; then grabs a noose) Will you be my friend? 
Me: Sure totally, you made me a friendship necklace? Oh my god your so sweet? 
Guy: … Yes.. Please, let me.. I cant I cant just go (laughing). 

– Got to walk a second time through– 

Same guy: My friends -wailing- 
Me: I came back I just really wanted to be friends so bad
Guy: (laughing more) Please, Im not allowed to laugh. 

I went to a Haunted House and literally befriended every actor there.

Specifically, I remember;

There were zombies walking around in the waiting room. I said “Hi!” and he gave me a high five. Every time he passed from then on, I got a high five.

Near the end, there were these twin little girls. “Come play with us.” They said. “Okay!” I said. “Forever.” They said. “Oh, sorry, can’t do that. I’m busy.”

I could hear them giggling.

Guy playing Freddie Kruger: Remember, you are all my children!

Me: thanks dad

A small chorus of teenagers: thanks dad

I went to a haunted corn maze once. Someone ran at me with a chainsaw. I just stared at him. He hung his head and walked away. I left.

The Real Horror Is The People We Dissapointed Along The Way

IM CRYING

My friends and I were in a really dark part of a haunted house and couldn’t find the exit, so the guy who had just jumped out at us had to say “to your left” in his same scary voice he’d used to scream and we were like “thanks!”

And then after a few moments of patting blindly at the wall he says again in the same ominous voice “your other left”

World Heritage Post

02 Oct 21:03

THIS!!

normal-with-adhd-is-a-joke:

take-a-dip-in-the-deadpool:

THIS IS AN AMAZING WAY TO THINK OF CHRONIC PAIN

I wanted to point out that Nurse Hadley, the woman in this video, is a hospice nurse. This is what people say to and about patients who don’t have long left to live. The fear of addiction and dependence on pain medication is so strong that people deny their literally dying family members proper pain management. You’re never going to please the “but what about addiction” people, ignore them and take the meds you need to function.

02 Oct 21:01

silly-slacker-person: guerrillatech: Ther...

silly-slacker-person:

guerrillatech:

There are political newspaper comics that aren’t this succinct

21 Sep 11:04

It’s the capital letter shouting that I love so much.

cincinnatiburgoo:

I can’t stop laughing at this 🤣😂🤣

It’s the capital letter shouting that I love so much.

21 Sep 11:03

I am just a humble unpaid intern for a coffee company that donates its profit to charity, but I will…

sizzlingsandwichperfection-blog:

I am just a humble unpaid intern for a coffee company that donates its profit to charity, but I will tell you motherfuckers one thing: if you try to steal money from the poor via treating or diagnosing tuberculosis, you will remember the name nerdfighteria.

17 Sep 22:54

It’s pronounced “sheee-it” in the southern fashion.

theshitpostcalligrapher:

squigglyexplosive:

mariomarc:

How did X get even stupider.

THIS BITCH EMPTY

XEET

o7

It’s pronounced “sheee-it” in the southern fashion.

17 Sep 22:53

Best of Neil’s stage directions/commentary in the good omens s1 script book

armageddidnt:

Best of Neil’s stage directions/commentary in the good omens s1 script book

I went back and read this to help me cope after s2, as one does