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Not too long ago, Patton Oswalt riffed on his idea for a great plot for the upcoming Star Wars: Episode VII film on Parks and Recreation. Now, it's got a whole bunch of..."digital effects" that turn it into the film we all deserve. It's alright JJ, we've got this one on lock. But thanks for throwing your hat in the ring! [iZacLess via Patton Oswalt]

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While you are hanging out on the Internet (in your underwear, maybe?) on a Saturday, kids that are smarter than either of us are out there getting ready to change the world. 18-year-old Eesha Khare (left), for instance, not only invented a supercapacitor that could someday be a phone battery that charges in just a couple of seconds; she also won $50,000 for it.

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Virginia Maiden had an unusual Tuesday, to say the least. She awoke that morning to find that her 1995 Toyota 4-Runner had been stolen. “She was so confused, didn’t know what was going on, it was just gone,” a co-worker would later tell the press. So Maiden hitched a ride to McDonald's, where she worked the drive-thru window. At some point that day she spotted something in the drive-thru line that shocked her: a 1995 Toyota 4-Runner.

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The victim of a home invasion managed to turn the tables on his attackers after they unwittingly forced him into his own gun closet.

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April Kidwell shrieks, "Different places!" about five minutes into Showgirls the Musical, and the crowd loses it. This is in response to being asked where she's from, and though these words alone are not particularly funny, their delivery is. So are the flying French fries that punctuate the line.

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It’s not unusual to see scantily clad women in most MMORPGs, but when you have a scantily clad warrior woman wearing armor that’s nothing more than a glorified bikini, its hard not to roll your eyes. Armor-clad or not, an itsy-bitsy bikini with one shoulder pad and puffy boots is not going to cut it. These fantastic pictures from the Repair Her Armor Tumblr show some of the most common culprits and the expression on the warrior’s face pretty much says it all.

See more ridiculous outfits after the break…

(Repair Her Armor via Kotaku)

A Bastrop pastor is convicted of cruelty to an animal today.

Rick Bartlett is guilty of a Class A misdemeanor and could be given up to a year in jail, fined up to $4,000 or both. A cat named "Moody" was found severely injured under a bridge and later died from his injuries. Bartlett had trapped the cat then taken it, alive and well, to the police station to have it impounded as a stray.

 Police noticed that the cat had tags with a phone number and ordered Bartlett to contact the cat's owner. Animal control officer Susan Keys testified that Bartlett promised to do so, and she trusted him because he was the police Chaplin at the time. That afternoon, Keys responded to Fisherman’s Park on a call of an injured cat. She was able to identify the cat as the same one Bartlett had in the back of his truck earlier in the day.  The cat's owner, Eddy Bell, says he is very happy with the verdict.

The front tires of an Austin school bus went into a sinkhole in East Austin on Thursday morning, officials said.

Jason Hill, a spokesman for Austin Water Utilities, said the hole was caused by a water main break near 1344 Cedar Ave.

The call about the bus came in around 7:20 a.m. The bus was in its normal route to George Sanchez Elementary School when it hit the sinkhole, said AISD spokesman Antonio Lujan. Seven children and two adults were on the bus, but got off safely, Lujan said

"AISD transportation supervisors arrived on scene, as did district police, to make sure the students were safely transferred and taken to school on a different bus," he said. "The intersection was closed to determine the condition of the street, as the sinkhole is getting larger due to a broken underground water pipe.  A wrecker arrived to pull the bus out of the sinkhole and towed to the bus terminal to assess the damages, if any."

City police and utility crews were on the scene to determine what happened and how to fix it, Hill said.

KXAN

Someone with $1.9 million to spare liked the nude Bea Arthur painting so much, they purchased it for $1.9 million.

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That's because it was originally a Vine created by business major Eric V. Dunn.

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