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28 Nov 02:30

22 Tips To Better Care for Introverts and Extroverts

by Belle Beth Cooper
Amir.judaki

بسی جالبه

WCO_016Here is something that hit me recently: For a long time I had a certain idea about what makes an introvert or an extrovert. I had always thought that it works something like this:

  • Extroversion relates to how outgoing someone is
  • Introversion is the same as being shy.

That was kind of my general perception. Doing just a little bit of reading made it clear very quickly - my thinking was way off!

Recently I dug into some of the full-on research about introverts vs extroverts and I think I’m much closer to understanding what the terms introvert and extrovert actually mean. When we briefly discussed this topic internally here at Buffer, a lot of people got very excited. So I hope what I’ve learned might be helpful to you, as well.

Where it all started – and why I had it all wrong

If we go a bit further back, we find that the terms introvert and extrovert (originally spelled extravert) were popularized by Carl Jung in the early 20th century. Unfortunately, their meanings got confused between then and now, and we started thinking that everyone belongs to one camp or the other. But actually, Carl’s point was that these are the very extremes of a scale. Which means that most of us fall somewhere in the middle.

There is no such thing as a pure introvert or extrovert. Such a person would be in the lunatic asylum. – Carl G Jung

So really, if we looked at how most of us operated, we would never be on either spectrum of the scale. It’d be much more likely that we are somewhere in the middle like this:

scale

There are a few theories about the differences between introverts and extroverts, and some recent research has even shown that our genetic makeup has a lot to do with which tendencies are strongest in each of us. And unlike my theory about how outgoing or shy we are, introversion and extroversion actually relate to where we get our energy from.

Or in other words, how we recharge our brains.

Introverts (or those of us with introverted tendencies) tend to recharge by spending time alone. They lose energy from being around people for long periods of time, particularly large crowds.

Extroverts, on the other hand, gain energy from other people. Extroverts actually find their energy is sapped when they spend too much time alone. They recharge by being social.

In the 60s, psychologist Hans Eysenck proposed that the difference between introverts and extroverts was that they simply had different levels of arousal—meaning the extent to which our minds and bodies are alert and responsive to stimulation.

Hans’s theory was that extroverts have a lower basic rate of arousal. This means that extroverts need to work harder to arouse their minds and bodies to the same ‘normal’ state that introverts might reach quite easily. This leads extroverts (or extroverted people, though they might not be quite on the extreme end of the scale) to seek novelty and adventure, and to crave the company of others.

E-I-activation

For introverts, this kind of stimulation can be overwhelming, since their rate of arousal is much higher, so they are stimulated easily. Time alone, one-on-one conversations and predictable situations are more likely to be pleasant for introverts who are more sensitive to external stimulation.

This becomes especially interesting if we look at other of the most common elements of body language and how introverts and extroverts might perceive behaviors differently.

On the same note, whilst exercising makes you happier in general, for an introvert to do a group sport, this might not lead to happiness in the same way it does for an extrovert.

How the brains of introverts and extroverts operate differently

Research has actually found that there is a difference in the brains of extroverted and introverted people in terms of how we process rewards and how our genetic makeup differs. For extroverts, their brains respond more strongly when a gamble pays off. Part of this is simply genetic, but it’s partly the difference of their dopamine systems as well.

An experiment that had people take gambles while in a brain scanner found the following:

When the gambles they took paid off, the more extroverted group showed a stronger response in two crucial brain regions: the amygdala and the nucleus accumbens.

The nucleus accumbens is part of the dopamine system, which affects how we learn, and is generally known for motivating us to search for rewards. The difference in the dopamine system in the extrovert’s brain tends to push them towards seeking out novelty, taking risks and enjoying unfamiliar or surprising situations more than others. The amygdala is responsible for processing emotional stimuli, which gives extroverts that rush of excitement when they try something highly stimulating which might overwhelm an introvert.

More research has actually shown that the difference comes from how introverts and extroverts process stimuli. That is, the stimulation coming into our brains is processed differently depending on your personality. For extroverts, the pathway is much shorter. It runs through an area where taste, touch, visual and auditory sensory processing takes place. For introverts, stimuli runs through a long, complicated pathway in areas of the brain associated with remembering, planning and solving problems.

introvert or extrovert - brain scan

What are signs that point someone closer to an introvert?

Introverts are tricky to understand, since it’s so easy for us to assume that introversion is the same as being shy, when in fact introverts are simply people who find it tiring to be around other people.

I love this explanation of an introvert’s need to be alone:

For introverts, to be alone with our thoughts is as restorative as sleeping, as nourishing as eating.

Introverted people are known for thinking things through before they speak, enjoying small, close groups of friends and one-on-one time, needing time alone to recharge and being upset by unexpected changes or last-minute surprises. Introverts are not necessarily shy, and may not even avoid social situations, but they will definitely need some time alone or just with close friends or family after spending time in a big crowd.

12 quick tips to better care for an introvert

To make it a bit easier to see which things would be most helpful to focus on when dealing with someone closer to introversion, I came across this fantastic graphic to illustrate better:

how to care

 

What makes someone closer to an extrovert?

On the opposite side of the coin, people who are extroverted are energized by people. They usually enjoy spending time with others, as this is how they recharge from time spent alone focusing or working hard.

I like how this extrovert explains the way they gain energy from being around other people:

When I am among people, I make eye contact, smile, maybe chat if there’s an opportunity (like being stuck in a long grocery store line). As an extrovert, that’s a small ‘ping’ of energy, a little positive moment in the day.

10 quick tips to better care for an extrovert

To give us some pointers on how to best care for someone who is an extrovert, this graphic has some great ideas I found:

how-to-care-for-extroverts

Ambiverts – the in-between that most of us are probably closer to?

Since introverts and extroverts are the extremes of the scale, the rest of us fall somewhere in the middle. Many of us lean one way or the other, but there are some who are quite balanced between the two tendencies. These people are called ambiverts.

The last time I took a personality test, I was smack-bang in the middle: 49% extroverted, 51% introverted. It’s hard to get more middle ground than that! (if you’re curious, you can try this quiz to see where you fit on the scale)

So let’s look at how an ambivert compares.

Ambiverts exhibit both extroverted and introverted tendencies. This means that they generally enjoy being around people, but after a long time this will start to drain them. Similarly, they enjoy solitude and quiet, but not for too long. Ambiverts recharge their energy levels with a mixture of social interaction and alone time.

Though ambiverts seem to be the more boring personality type, being in the middle of everyone else, this balance can actually be a good thing. A study by Adam Grant, author of *Give and Take: A Revolutionary Approach to Success found that ambiverts perform better in sales than either introverts or extroverts. Ambiverts actually closed 24% more sales.

The commonly held myth that being highly extroverted is important for a salesperson is actually untrue, since extreme extroverts lack the balance of an ambivert which helps them to use varied approaches to closing a sale.

On another note, we’ve explored before that simple productivity tips might not work in the same way they do for introverts vs extroverts, knowing where you are on the scale can make a big difference to improve your daily productivity outcome.

How to get the best out of everyone: Focus on awareness for each type

It’s pretty much certain that we’re going to come in contact with a variety of personalities throughout our lives, from extreme introverts to extreme extroverts, and everyone in-between. Understanding the differences between these tendencies can help us to get along with others and get the best out of everyone.

This story about an introvert and her extroverted roommate is a great illustration of how unaware we can be of how much these differences can affect us:

The first few months of living together didn’t work well because we didn’t know how to care for each other! I would try to give her space by always knocking on her door. She got annoyed because I kept knocking, and wouldn’t let myself in, and I got annoyed when she barged in my room without warning!

Lifehacker has a great explanation of the differences between introverts and extroverts, which uses the analogy of being right- or left-handed. This is a great way of seeing the benefits of both tendencies, regardless of which one you exhibit more of:

Most of us will be one or the other, but writing with your right hand doesn’t render your left hand inert. Similarly, an extroverted person can still do things that aren’t typically associated with extroversion. Meanwhile, introverts can learn to adapt to more extroverted scenarios, even if it might not come as naturally.

This same article on Lifehacker goes on to make a really important point: “The absolute worst thing you can do with either type is use a single word to define your approach.” Understanding the tendencies of ourselves and others is just the beginning. Effective communication means we need to take into account each person’s personality as well.

If we focus on simply being extremely aware of which type we’re dealing with, noticing small behaviors that point us more in the extroverts or introverts direction, then I’ve we’ll be easily on the right track to dealing with people in the right way.

Especially in our Social Media age, if we look at some of the latest social media statistics, there is a clear trend that caring for introverts and extroverts is something we should keep focusing on.

What has your experience been in dealing with both extroverts and introverts? I’d love your thoughts on this! You can leave a comment below, email me or catch me on Twitter at @bellebethcooper.

Photocredit: Lonerwolf, Research Digest, The AC Is On, Musings on Mormonism, Falling Into Wonderland, Apartment 46

The post 22 Tips To Better Care for Introverts and Extroverts appeared first on The Buffer blog: productivity, life hacks, writing, user experience, customer happiness and business..

12 Jul 11:04

کریس وترل٬ بنیانگذار گوگل ریدر: اگر الآن ایده ریدر به ذهنم می رسید٬‌ از گوگل فرار می کردم

by نیما دادگستر
کریس وترل٬ بنیانگذار گوگل ریدر: اگر الآن ایده ریدر به ذهنم می رسید٬‌
بعد از تماشای خلع سلاح و سپس قتل گوگل ریدر که تقریبا ۸ سال پیش پا به عرصه گذاشته بود٬ موسس گوگل ریدر آقای کریس وترل می گوید که چنانچه این ایده در گوگل امروز به ذهنش خطور می کرد٬ از شرکت می رفت تا آن را مستقل بسازد٬ نه اینکه در دست رهبران گوگل رهایش کند.

او می گوید: «قطعا آن را در داخل گوگل [امروزی] نمی ساختم. متنفرم از اینکه ایده من بخواهد رقیب گوگل پلاس باشد. چنین چیزی ناامید کننده است.»

اظهار نظر کریس یک نکته جالب را عیان می کند. گوگل همیشه از فرهنگ نوآوری که کمکش کرده تا پروژه های کارمندان نظیر جیمیل٬ گوگل نیوز و اد سنس را تبدیل به خدماتی برای کاربران کند استفاده برده٬ ولی با در نظر گرفتن اینکه محصولات موفق هم ممکن است سر انجام به قتل برسند٬ شاید کارمندان دیگر خیلی کم به بیان ایده های شخصی شان در داخل شرکت بپردازند.

جنا بیلوتا٬‌از طراحان تجربه کاربری در گوگل که با وترل بر روی ریدر کار کرده بود هم می گوید بعد از ماجرای ریدر: «اگر کارمندان نسبت به ایده ای علاقه فراوان داشته باشند٬ احتمالا برای محافظت از آن ترجیح می دهند شرکت را ترک کنند.»

جنا و کریس که دیگر در گوگل نیستند و با هم اپلیکیشن Avacado را پایه گذاری کرده اند٬ شاهد حذف شدن یک پروژه موفق بوده اند و نظرات خودشان در این باره دارند. کریس می گوید:

«مطمئن نیستم ولی شاید افرادی که ایده ای دارند، حس کنند که بهتر است آن را بیرون از شرکت پیگیری کنند٬ نه اینکه به گوگل بسپرند و چند سال بعد که محصول موفقی شد بشنوند "مهم نیست چند میلیون نفر از آن استفاده می کنند٬ ما نگرانی های بزرگتری داریم."»

بیلوتا هم می گوید شاید مسئله ای که این همه سر و صدا به پا کرده این است که «قدیم ها محصولات تجربی زیادی در گوگل ارائه می شد٬ آنهایی که دوام نمی آوردند حذف می شدند٬ ولی مسئله این است که ریدر دوام هم آورد و باز حذف شد.»

به نظر می رسد سوال بعدی درباره گوگل این باشد که این شرکت چطور می خواهد در دوران پس از ریدر٬ کارمندانی با ایده های ناب را حفظ کند. زیرا تصمیمات شرکت ها است که وجهه آنها را نزد کارمندان شان تعیین می کند.
11 Jul 18:03

Amusing Images Of Soldiers Playing ‘Quidditch’ In The Desert



In a post by Boys Boots n’ Booze, a bunch of American soldiers were found ‘playing Quidditch’—a sport in the J.K. Rowling’s Harry Potter universe—while in a desert in Afghanistan.

Though obviously fictional and few to look at, the resulting three images are rather amusing.






[via Geekologie and Boys Boots n’ Booze]
11 Jul 14:44

مزارعي كه در يونسكو ثبت شدند (15 عكس)

by ارسال شده توسط administrator

  مزارع كاشت برنج در هانگي هاني در چين جز آثار فرهنگي يونسكو ثبت شده است. اين مزارع با دست و بر روي دامنه تپه ها كنده ميشوند.در اين بخش از دنيا مدت 1300 سال است كه كشاورزان به كاشت برنج به اين شيوه مشغولند. اين مزارع صحنه هاي جالب و ديدني را از بالا پديد مي آورند كه در  اين آلبوم تاپ ناپ مشاهده خواهيد كرد.

 

 

 

 

 

این عکسها ادامه دارد....

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24 May 07:36

The secrets of body language: why you should never cross your arms again

by Leo Widrich
Amir.judaki

The nice fact is that these behaviours impose internal changes (such as to our hormone system) as well.

improve my body language scienceBody language is older and more innate for us as humans than even language or facial expressions. That’s why people born blind can perform the same body language expressions as people who can see. They come pre-programmed with our brains.

I’ve always been incredibly fascinated with body language and how it helps us achieve our goals in life better. The power of body language is probably best described by Amy Cuddy’s famous quote:

“Our nonverbals govern how other people think and feel about us.”

If you are anything like me, then you’ve had a healthy obsession with body language for some time. In recent years, a few fascinating studies at Harvard, Princeton and other top universities shed new light on body language and how to use it at work. So whilst the power of language is extremely important to convey the right message. The power of body language however, might be the determining factor of how someone makes us feel.

Here is an insight of the latest studies and how we can use body language to our advantage in every day life.

Your body expresses emotion better than your face

We all grow up learning about how to deal with each other based on facial expressions. And yet, that might not at all be the best way to judge other people’s emotions.

Researchers from Princeton performed a very simple experiment. They asked study participants to judge from photography whether that person is feeling joy, loss, victory or pain. Now some photographs showed facial expressions only, some showed body language and some both.

Have a go yourself at the following picture and try to say whether the tennis player’s faces on the right enjoy victory or loss:

improve my body language science tips

And the results couldn’t be any more startling:

“In four separate experiments, participants more accurately guessed the pictured emotion based on body language — alone or combined with facial expressions — than on facial context alone.”

Especially extremely positive and extremely negative emotions are very hard to distinguish from each other, explains head researcher Todorov.

Now, it gets even more interesting. Body language isn’t just something we have to learn. Most emotional expressions come built into our system. For example, scientists from British Columbia observed congenitally blind people at the Paralympics.

In this example, the left athlete can see, whereas the right athlete is congenitally blind. Yet, after winning, both express the same body language for victory:

improve my body language science

So, if body language is both so ancient and ingrained and also so powerful to express our true emotions, how can we use it better in our every day lives to achieve what we want?

Amy Cuddy from Harvard has answers for us:

Body language changes who you are – literally

In one of my favorite Ted Talks, Amy Cuddy explains some of the most peculiar happenings of body language. Cuddy focuses a lot on the business world and how body language is helpful for us here and the possibilities seem to have no boundaries.

Cuddy distinguishes between 2 different types of body postures. One are powerful poses, and their counter part are powerless ones. Here is an example of a powerful pose:

improve my body language science

 

And here is an example of a powerless one:

improve my body language science

Now Cuddy’s research reveals a bunch of extremely interesting things. The first is that expressing more powerful poses helps us get better jobs, makes us feel better and makes us overall more successful.

And yet, it goes a lot further than to just change the positing of your legs or arms. Cuddy explains that inside our bodies, actual changes are happening as our body language changes. These changes largely have to do with hormones.

The two hormones in question are:

  • Testosterone: The “power” hormone, which amongst lots of other things helps us to be a better leader, have more focus and attention.
  • Cortisol: The “stress” hormone, which amongst lost of other things makes us less re-active to stress, makes us feel overwhelmed and powerless.

Here is what Cuddy’s experiment contained:

They brought people into a room. For two minutes, they would either perform a powerful pose or a powerless pose. Then they would go on into performing a job interview. The results were absolutely stunning:

Neutral recruiters, who didn’t know who performed which pose, consistently picked only those that previously performed the powerful poses as people they would want to hire.

On top of that, the actual hormone levels of people changed dramatically. Here is the increase in testosterone and drop in cortisol after performing the power-pose (for just 2 minutes!):

improve my body language science testosterone

And here are the hormone levels after performing the powerless-pose, with a significant drop in testosterone and increase in cortisol:

improve my body language science cortisol

According to Cuddy, here findings show that changing our body language doesn’t just change our outcomes. It changes who we are as people. So instead of “faking until you make it”, her advice is:

Fake it until you become it.

Can you fake it until you make it? Yes, here are 5 postures to work on today to answer the question “How can I improve my body language”:

“How can I improve my body language?” – Here are 5 postures to work on

1.) Focus on the position of your feet

Carol Kinsey Goman has researched the importance of body language in the workplace for many years. One of her best tips is to watch your feet. A lot of the time, we focus on our upper body or faces, yet our feet reveal more about our emotions than we might think:

“When you approach 2 people talking, you will be acknowledged in one of two ways. If the feet of your two colleagues stay in place and they twist only their upper torsos in your direction, they don’t really want you to join the conversation. But if their feet open to include you then you know that you are truly invited to participate.”

In another example from her book Goman explains when to know that “conversations are over”:

Whenever you are speaking with a co-worker who seems to be paying attention, and whose upper body is angled toward you, but whose legs and feet have turned toward the door – realize that the conversation is over. Her feet are telling you she wants to leave. Foot positions are revealing even if someone’s legs are crossed.

I’ve started to experiment this at the Buffer office too. Whenever I speak with someone I make sure to give them my full attention – head til toe. So far, it’s been a great experience.

2.) Smile – it’ll make you happier

We smile because we are happy. But does it work the other way around too? Researchers at Cardiff University think so. People who smile, without actually feeling happy, can make themselves feel a lot happier, says Michael Lewis, a co-author of the study:

“It would appear that the way we feel emotions isn’t just restricted to our brain—there are parts of our bodies that help and reinforce the feelings we’re having,”

Of course, being able to smile well is a whole other story. For now, give it a try to smile in the restroom or in another quiet place before a difficult conversation, job interview or meeting. It might just make you more successful.

3.) Practice Amy Cuddy’s “power poses” before important meetings

Amy Cuddy suggests 3 distinct power poses to practice for 2-3 minutes before you have an important conversation.

Try them next time in a quiet place and see if they have the same results for you:

Power-posture 1:

improve my body language science power poses

Power-posture 2:

improve my body language science power poses

 

Power-posture 3:

improve my body language science - power poses

 

4.) Realign your body more congenially with your conversation partner

Another great tip from Goman mentions that if you try to align yourself more congenially with a conversation partner you will be able to solve tension in conversations and come to solutions more quickly:

“If you physically align yourself with that person (sitting or standing shoulder to shoulder facing the same direction), you will defuse the situation. “

I’ve found this especially true with meeting people you’ve never met before. It’s hard to build rapport at the start, focusing on aligning can make a big difference. Give it a try.

5.) Lower your voice with deep breathing

Although not a specific tip for body posture, this is one of my favorite tips. Men and women with deeper voices are more likely to land in leadership positions and are generally perceived as a greater authority.

To lower your voice, especially before an interview, try to take some deep belly breaths. It will relax your throat area, which generally contracts and raises the pitch of your voice.

 

What other body language insights have you come across? I’d love your insights on this fascinating topic!

Quick note: Check out Buffer as the easiest way to share any article to Twitter, Facebook or LinkedIn with one click.

The post The secrets of body language: why you should never cross your arms again appeared first on The Buffer blog: productivity, life hacks, writing, user experience, customer happiness and business..

14 Mar 10:55

Ineffective Sorts

Amir.judaki

ارزش خوندنشو داره :))

StackSort connects to StackOverflow, searches for 'sort a list', and downloads and runs code snippets until the list is sorted.
03 Mar 21:10

http://nabehengam.blogfa.com/post-263.aspx

by nabehengam
Amir.judaki

من دارم نت مینویسم در واقع :))
این پست هم خالی ه. به این قصد طراحی و ساخته شده.
من این مقاله از بی بی سی فارسی رو بسیار دوست داشتم. ولی نمیدونم چرا چون قدیمی بود برام نشونش نمیداد توی فیدها
http://bbc.in/VNtgZt