adamcz

NEW YORK—Releasing the records in hopes of reducing automobile accidents nationwide, 1-800-EAT-SHIT on Tuesday finally published decades of reckless-driving data. “These documents catalogue millions of reported moving violations from the sticker’s debut in 1987 and provide valuable information that hopefully will help keep everyone safer on the road,” said head researcher Lydia Cattalone, explaining that the reports based on the hotline calls, breaking down the frequency with which motorists forgot to signal, sped through toll booths, and cut other drivers off over a 30-year period, could potentially decrease automobile deaths by up to 15 percent. “When we first proposed the idea of a bumper sticker as a means of data collection, it was considered rather unorthodox, but it has paid off with a massive repository of vital information. We, of course, would like to thank all of our volunteer respondents, whose passionate and consistent reporting made the whole ...

PROVIDENCE, RI—Realizing the depths of her mistake far too late, local woman Alicia Cohen quietly admitted to herself, “Twas hubris led me here,” as she sat naked on a public toilet with her romper around her ankles, sources said Wednesday. “What hath my conceit wrought but ruin as I sit naked and discomfited upon this most unclean privy,” said Cohen, shivering upon the women’s restroom toilet with her one-piece garment pooled at her feet. “Vanity’s fool am I! Brought low as dust by folly, low as the once fine fabric that now lies crumpled before mine eyes.” At press time, Cohen was cursing a broken shoe heel and the “credulous newborn babe undone by faith foul misplaced in an outlet mall.”

An alert reader recently pointed my attention to a free online service offered by big-three credit bureau Experian that allows anyone to request the personal identification number (PIN) needed to unlock a consumer credit file that was previously frozen at Experian.

The first hurdle for instantly revealing anyone’s freeze PIN is to provide the person’s name, address, date of birth and Social Security number (all data that has been jeopardized in breaches 100 times over — including in the recent Equifax breach — and that is broadly for sale in the cybercrime underground).

After that, one just needs to input an email address to receive the PIN and swear that the information is true and belongs to the submitter. I’m certain this warning would deter all but the bravest of identity thieves!

The final authorization check is that Experian asks you to answer four so-called “knowledge-based authentication” or KBA questions. As I have noted in countless stories published here previously, the problem with relying on KBA questions to authenticate consumers online is that so much of the information needed to successfully guess the answers to those multiple-choice questions is now indexed or exposed by search engines, social networks and third-party services online — both criminal and commercial.

What’s more, many of the companies that provide and resell these types of KBA challenge/response questions have been hacked in the past by criminals that run their own identity theft services.

“Whenever I’m faced with KBA-type questions I find that database tools like Spokeo, Zillow, etc are my friend because they are more likely to know the answers for me than I am,” said Nicholas Weaver, a senior researcher in networking and security for the International Computer Science Institute (ICSI).

The above quote from Mr. Weaver came in a story from May 2017 which looked at how identity thieves were able to steal financial and personal data for over a year from TALX, an Equifax subsidiary that provides online payroll, HR and tax services. Equifax says crooks were able to reset the 4-digit PIN given to customer employees as a password and then steal W-2 tax data after successfully answering KBA questions about those employees.

In short: Crooks and identity thieves broadly have access to the data needed to reliably answer KBA questions on most consumers. That is why this offering from Experian completely undermines the entire point of placing a freeze. 

After discovering this portal at Experian, I tried to get my PIN, but the system failed and told me to submit the request via mail. That’s fine and as far as I’m concerned the way it should be. However, I also asked my followers on Twitter who have freezes in place at Experian to test it themselves. More than a dozen readers responded in just a few minutes, and most of them reported success at retrieving their PINs on the site and via email after answering the KBA questions.

Here’s a sample of the KBA questions the site asked one reader:

1. Please select the city that you have previously resided in.

2. According to our records, you previously lived on (XXTH). Please choose the city from the following list where this street is located.

3. Which of the following people live or previously lived with you at the address you provided?

4. Please select the model year of the vehicle you purchased or leased prior to July 2017 .

I understand if people who place freezes on their credit files are prone to misplacing the PIN provided by the bureaus that is needed to unlock or thaw a freeze. This is human nature, and the bureaus should absolutely have a reliable process to recover this PIN. However, the information should be sent via snail mail to the address on the credit record, not via email to any old email address.

This is yet another example of how someone or some entity other than the credit bureaus needs to be in put in charge of rethinking and rebuilding the process by which consumers apply for and manage credit freezes. I addressed some of these issues — as well as other abuses by the credit reporting bureaus — in the second half of a long story published Wednesday evening.

Experian has not yet responded to requests for comment.

While this service is disappointing, I stand by my recommendation that everyone should place a freeze on their credit files. I published a detailed Q&A a few days ago about why this is so important and how you can do it. For those wondering about whether it’s possible and advisable to do this for their kids or dependents, check out The Lowdown on Freezing Your Kid’s Credit.

Carl now for pickup or delivery!

According to The Hollywood Reporter, Colin Trevorrow has dropped out of directing Star Wars: Episode IX. Disney and Lucasfilm have confirmed the news, releasing a statement that says the studios and Trevorrow have “mutually chosen to part ways.” It adds that Trevorrow has been a “wonderful collaborator throughout the…

Read more...

I’m Josh, and I love my fat disgusting pig-wife.

I’m a freelance author and lifestyle blogger. My wife is a fatass and tub of lard. I met my wife Charlotte at the county fair when I mistook her for one of the prize hogs and started feeding her corn out of my palm, careful to keep my fingers curled in so that she wouldn’t gnaw off the tips of my fingers. About a full four minutes into feeding her, I realized she wasn’t actually a hog, but was actually a very fat yet somehow sexually attractive woman! We quickly fell in love, even as she never kept her eyes off the corn. We’ve been inseparable ever since, partially because I always have a little bit of corn in my hand and she’s always sniffing and licking it. She’s so cute like that.

I love my fat butterball wife, disgusting curves and all. I love the way she really fills out her sty. For me, there is nothing sexier than this woman right here: thick thighs, big booty, bunch of chocolate sauce in her hair ‘cause she fell asleep in her sundae, contact lenses made of Necco wafers, sometimes eats out of the recycle bin if she’s too tired to get to the fridge. This gorgeous girl I married fills out every inch of her jeans and is still the fattest one in the room. But hey, that’s just me. I’m a feminist, and so is my big-as-a-house revolting wife.

As a teenager, I was teased for being attracted to things that didn’t even look human, like women fatter than a size 4 and big rocks and like those old timey bikes with one big round wheel. Then, as I became a man and started to educate myself on issues such as feminism and farm animals, I realized how many men have bought into the lies of the media. A woman doesn’t have to be tall and thin to be beautiful! A woman doesn’t even have to have a name or personality! She can just be a shapeless blob with no distinguishing marks about her like a pile of condensed milk. That’s how I feel about my gorgeous, disgusting wife Carly. Wait, is that her name, “Carly?” That doesn’t look right. What’s her name? Definitely something with a C. I’d ask her, but her mouth is full right now, as she is eating Thanksgiving dinner in August.

Sure, my wife isn’t going to be on the cover of Cosmopolitan, except when she sits on it because I’ve lined her kennel with issues of Cosmopolitan. Because when she sits around the kennel she sits aroooound the kennel. Which is fine! But Cindy is so kind. Cindy has the biggest heart of anyone I know. Even her heart is plus-sized. And I love it for that. Whether my wife is finding an old bagel tucked underneath her cute side rolls or devouring a whole chocolate fountain even the metal parts before the guy we rented it from comes to take it away, she’s always being true to herself. She’s always just being Claire.

Guys, rethink what society has told you that you should desire. A real woman is not a porn star or a bikini mannequin or a movie character. She’s perfectly unique. She has stretch marks. She has big flat teeth that she uses to bite you if you try to cut when she’s waiting in line for soft serve. She has cute little dimples on her booty that she fills with hard candies and bouillon cubes to keep for later in case she gets hungry at the DMV. The twelve teats that run vertically down her front might not all be the same size. She’s real.

Girls, don’t ever fool yourself by thinking you have to fit a certain mold to be loved and appreciated. There is a guy out there who is going to celebrate your turgid sausage of a body for exactly who you are, someone who will love you just like I love my disgusting wife Chappie. I love you, honey!

HUDSON, NY—Saying he felt compelled to personally respond to the actions of a president he views as vicious and corrupt, local dipshit Scott Rudnick announced Thursday his intention to fight the Trump administration through his art.

The 42-year-old dumbass, who has reportedly sketched out ideas for more than two dozen artistic projects addressing issues of a highly topical nature, stated that he will stand up to the presidency of Donald Trump by employing a mix of visual and performance-based media, as well as literature and song.

“As an artist, I can’t sit idly by—when you see something like this happening in the world, you have to act,” said the complete moron, whose most recent efforts include a series in which Trump’s likeness is incorporated into Soviet-era propaganda posters and a prose poem condemning the president’s decision to ban transgender individuals from serving in the armed ...

WASHINGTON—Warning that a successful launch would constitute a grave threat to American population centers from coast to coast, leading analysts confirmed Wednesday that South Korea is currently developing a new pop group capable of reaching the United States.

Experts stated that significant South Korean resources have been dedicated to the project of creating an intercontinental, all-girl supergroup, with a team of highly skilled producers, vocal coaches, and choreographers working in hidden rehearsal facilities to devise a strategic pop phenomenon that, if fully deployed, could inflict widespread devastation.

“We’re far more vulnerable than we realize. This country isn’t prepared at all for a full-scale album release.”

“Our analysis indicates this is an extremely powerful synth-driven bubblegum pop quintet—if it were to reach U.S. soil, the effects would be catastrophic for millions,” said Rita Bradley of the Woodrow Wilson International Center for Scholars, referring to the group ...

During a scenic route Foley checks the place out and finds The mobsters and then kills them and then leaves them for dead and goes to the yacht boat and then finds the mobsters and then kills them and then steals a Yacht boat and takes it to the boatyard and then kills the mobsters and escapes. In the final scene Foley and Ethan goes into the office and then finds the Miro’s crew and then kills them and then goes inside and finds the z Members and then kills them and goes upstairs and then they open the door and locks it and then goes in the hallway and finds the Miro’s crew and then Foley kills them and then goes in the room and finds Miro and then Foley tells her that she is going outside and then Foley goes outside and then Miro is the bad girl and then Foley kills Miro and then Miro is killed. In the ending scene Foley and Ethan are remembering the day that they remarked it.

Link

​why cats love eating fish

because they both smell bad

​What do you get when you cross a t-rex and a chicken

nothing but death

Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to say our goodbyes to our dear friend America, who died recently after a brief, intense battle with fascism and a long, slow battle with carbs. Thank you all for coming out to help say farewell. It’s not easy. But at least America died doing what it loved most: deep-frying Halloween candy while white men tried to explain to women what jazz is.

America was sick for a really long time. In the early stages, I think we were all in denial. You could tell that America was unwell—public displays of brutality, deeply internalized prejudice, “Entourage”—but it seemed curable. Just a case of plain old electile dysfunction. We thought that we’d caught the fascism early, but, as we now know, it had metastasized. America was more Florida than country by the end.

America was born right here, in America, and lived here its entire life. America was always about family. It is survived by its similarly ill father, Britain, and its large brood of children: baseball, Google, fireworks, losing your fingers to fireworks, giving your Uber driver only four stars because he talked to you, thinking granola is healthy, Chicago (the place), “Chicago” (the musical), “Chicago” (the movie adaptation of the musical), Chicago (the band), “Chicago Fire,” “Chicago Med,” “Chicago P.D.,” “Chicago Justice,” “Chicago ‘Chicago’ ” (a show about the Chicago production of the musical “Chicago,” coming to NBC this fall), and a bunch of wars.

I’d personally be nowhere without America. America was there when I was born, when I got married, when I saw Janet Jackson’s nipple at the Super Bowl. Remember that? After that happened, none of us slept for days, because we had never seen the pointy part of a boob on our TVs before, and it really upset us. America was really cool that way. It would always get mad when you’d see the pointy part of a boob on a TV. I’m gonna miss that.

However, we should not dwell on the loss of our dear country, friend, and place where all the Cheesecake Factories and Lids stores are. Today, let’s celebrate America’s life, and remember all of the remarkable things it accomplished and how many actors playing Spider-Man who keep getting cuter and younger were inside of it. America gave us so much. And, boy, did it look good for its age. America was two hundred and forty-one years old when it died, but it didn’t look a day over a hundred and sixty-four! It looked so young, it could’ve been the very same America that put its own citizens in internment camps!

America got a bunch of things really right. Mostly how to put food inside other food. Anyone can just eat a chicken. But in a duck?! In a turkey?! In a gun?! No one is going to forget the Turduckenun any time soon. America was so inventive that way. And, I mean, everyone does silly stuff when they’re young. America was beautiful, too. Sure, it was a little lumpy, and you could always see its Florida through its pants, but it just got hotter with age. So hot. It was so, so hot by the time it died. Almost too hot to live in.

If there’s anything we should take away from this tragedy, it’s that you should always check yourself for fascism, especially around your midsection. It’s easy enough to do in the shower. If you catch it early, it can be cleared up with a rigorous regimen of local elections and books and yoga. But America was cocky. Nothing bad had ever happened to it before! It assumed this fascism would pass, just like the Second World War and “Entourage” had.

What a shame. America was just the best damn country in the whole U.S.A. I’m sorry that I’m getting choked up. I get really emotional when I think of America, and also I took too big of a bite of Turduckenun and it got lodged in my windpipe. We will all miss America greatly. Every time I see an American flag or a gun, I’ll think of America. But we can all rest easy knowing America is in a better place now: Russia.

@shannan_meow TAG YOUR VEGO/VEGAN FRIENDS WHO ARE GOING TO MARRY A CARROT. ---------------------------------------------- #thesimpsonstattoo #thesimpsons #simpsonstattoo #simpsons #tattoo #moe #inked #tat #tattyslip #simpsonsfan #homer #bart #lisa #maggie #marge #mattgroening #futurama #cartoontattoo #cartoontats #epictattoo #simpsonstat

​Doctor doctor! You have to help me! I feel like a spoon. 

OK sit quitley and Don’t dig!!!!!

​WHY BABIES DO NOT TALK ?

BECAUSE THEY HAVE INVISIBLE YAM IN THEIR MOUTH.

Once you understand how easy and common it is for thieves to attach “skimming” devices to ATMs and other machines that accept debit and credit cards, it’s difficult not to closely inspect and even tug on the machines before using them. Several readers who are in the habit of doing just that recently shared images of skimmers they discovered after gently pulling on various parts of a cash machine they were about to use.

Viewed from less than two feet away, this ATM looks reasonably safe to use, right?

But something fishy comes into view when we change our perspective slightly. Can you spot what doesn’t belong here?

Congratulations if you noticed the tiny pinhole in the upper right corner of the phony black bezel that was affixed over top of the cash dispenser slot. That fake bezel overlay contained a tiny pinhole camera angled toward the PIN pad to record time-stamped videos of people entering their PINs:

How about the card acceptance slot? Looks legit (if a tad shinier than the rest of the ATM), right?

What happens if we apply a tiny bit of pressure to the anti-skimming green bezel where customers are expected to insert their ATM cards? Look at that! The cheap plastic bezel that skimmer thieves placed on top of the real card acceptance slot starts to pull away. Also, you can see some homemade electronics that are not very well hidden at the mouth of the bezel.

ATM card skimmers contain tiny bits of electronics that record payment card data from the magnetic stripe on the backs of cards inserted into a hacked ATM. Most commonly (as in this case), a card skimmer is paired with a pinhole spy camera hidden above or beside the PIN pad to record time-stamped video of cardholders entering their PINs. Taken together, the stolen data allows thieves to fabricate new cards and use PINs to withdraw cash from victim accounts.

Card skimmers designed to look like the green anti-skimming devices found on many ATMs are some of the most common cash machine skimming devices in use today, probably because they are relatively cheap to manufacture en masse and there are many fraudsters peddling these in the cybercrime underground.

Typically, the fake anti-skimmer bezels like the one pictured above are made of hard plastic. However, the reader who shared these images said this bezel card skimming device was made of a semi-flexible, vinyl-like plastic material.

“I immediately went in and notified the manager who shut down the machine,” the reader said in an email to KrebsOnSecurity. “All the tellers were busy so he asked me to stand by the ATM and stop people from trying to use it while he called his security team. In the three minutes I was standing there a young woman came up and started to dip her card in the slot even thought the screen was black. I stopped her and told her and pointed out what was going. She was thankful.”

Normally, these bezel skimmers look more like the hard plastic one that came off of this ATM at a 7-Eleven convenience store in Texas in February, after a customer yanked on the ATM’s card acceptance slot:

Many people believe that skimmers are mainly a problem in the United States, where most ATMs still do not require more secure chip-based cards that are far more expensive and difficult for thieves to clone. However, it’s precisely because most U.S. ATMs lack this security requirement that skimming remains so prevalent in Europe.

Mainly for reasons of backward compatibility to accommodate American tourists, many European ATMs allow non-chip-based cards to be inserted into the cash machine. What’s more, many chip-based cards issued by American and European banks alike still have cardholder data encoded on a magnetic stripe in addition to the chip.

When thieves skim ATMs in Europe, they generally sell the stolen card and PIN data to fraudsters on the other side of the pond. Those fraudsters in turn will encode the card data onto counterfeit cards and withdraw cash at ATMs here in the United States.

Interestingly, even after most U.S. banks put in place chip-capable ATMs, the magnetic stripe will still be needed because it’s an integral part of the way ATMs work: Most ATMs in use today require a magnetic stripe for the card to be accepted into the machine. The main reason for this is to ensure that customers are putting the card into the slot correctly, as embossed letters and numbers running across odd spots in the card reader can take their toll on the machines over time.

Below is part of a skimming device that a reader recently pulled off of a compromised ATM in Dusseldorf, Germany. This component actually cracked off of the hard plastic fake anti-skimming bezel that was placed by a fraudster over top of the card acceptance device of an NCR cash machine there.

Here’s the plastic overlay that the piece pictured in the reader’s hand above broke away from:

It’s fine to tug on parts of an ATM before using it (heck, I’ve been known to do this even for machines I have no intention of using), but just know that doing so doesn’t guarantee that you will detect a cleverly hidden skimmer.

As I’ve noted in countless skimmer stories here, the simplest way to protect yourself from ATM skimming is to cover your hand when entering your PIN. That’s because most skimmers rely on hidden cameras to steal the victim’s PIN. As easy as this is, you’d be amazed at how many people fail to take this basic precaution.

Yes, there is still a chance that thieves could use a PIN-pad overlay device to capture your PIN, but in my experience these are far less common than hidden cameras (and quite a bit more costly for thieves who aren’t making their own skimmers).

Also, if you visit an ATM that looks strange, tampered with, or out of place, try to find another cash machine. Use only machines in public, well-lit areas, and avoid ATMs in secluded spots. Finally, don’t neglect your own physical security while at the cash machine: As common as these skimmers are, you’re probably more likely to get mugged withdrawing cash from an ATM than you are to find a skimmer attached to it.

Did you enjoy this post? Are you fascinated by skimming devices? Check out my series, All About Skimmers.

​What 2 thing make a girl happy ??

i love you and 50% discount

@tattoosbyjimmi "No Funeral...." ---------------------------------------------- #thesimpsonstattoo #thesimpsons #simpsonstattoo #simpsons #tattoo #moe #inked #tat #tattyslip #simpsonsfan #homer #bart #lisa #maggie #marge #mattgroening #futurama #cartoontattoo #cartoontats #epictattoo #simpsonstat

@shawnfarrelltattoo "...Ever seen a man say goodbye to a shoe?" ---------------------------------------------- #thesimpsonstattoo #thesimpsons #simpsonstattoo #simpsons #tattoo #moe #inked #tat #tattyslip #simpsonsfan #homer #bart #lisa #maggie #marge #mattgroening #futurama #cartoontattoo #cartoontats #epictattoo #simpsonstat

​what did the x box say to the wii

your old and I am new

WASHINGTON—Insisting to the nation that it’s totally fine in there and that they definitely don’t need any help, the country’s top experts from the other room reported Friday that 87 percent of loud crashing noises are nothing.

Speaking in muffled voices audible from the other side of the wall, the experts confirmed that nearly nine in 10 of these sounds—which included thuds, bangs, and a crash followed by a pause and then several smaller crashes in quick succession—honestly aren’t anything at all.

“Not a thing to worry about,” the experts said almost instantaneously after a loud clatter suddenly rang out from the adjacent room. “It’s okay.”

“Everything’s okay,” they added.

Despite initially reporting “Dammit!” and “God dammit!” separated by several seconds, experts from the other room emphasized that all such preliminary statements should now be entirely disregarded, because the situation is ...