Theasp

Submitted by: Unknown

Submitted by: Hodgebaba

Redditor shystone has redesigned the posters for iconic films like Blade Runner, Apocalypse Now, Full Metal Jacket, and more by replacing the film names with the titles of the books they were based on. You can find more of the clever posters on imgur.

images via shystone

via reddit, Nerdcore

Arrested Development has released a new series of Netflix promo posters giving us a glimpse of the zany Bluth family, who are all gearing up for the upcoming fourth season. 15 new instant streaming episodes will be coming to Netflix on May 26, 2013. You may remember when we wrote about their collection of prop-based teaser posters.

bored-im:

Sickest Candle ever.

Los Angeles-based cinematographer and bike fiend Richie Trimble unveiled Stoopid Tall, a freakishly tall bike, at last Sunday’s CicLAvia open street event in Los Angeles. The hand-built bike is 14.5 feet tall at the seat and has a 32-foot-long bicycle chain. Trimble recorded his nerve-wracking 20 mile ride to Venice Beach with a GoPro camera that was attached to his chest. He managed to complete the ride without incident, though he nearly got wedged under a highway overpass. Trimble recently spoke to Streetsblog Los Angeles about the ride and his plans for an even taller bike.

photo by Spencer Harding

photo by Hal Bergman

via Streetsblog Los Angeles, Blame It On The Voices

Submitted by: Unknown

In its travels, one of NASA’s Mars rovers seems to have drawn a penis on the surface of Mars. The photo, spotted by redditor aggrazel, appears on NASA’s Jet Propulsion Laboratory mission page.

image via NASA

via reddit, The Huffington Post

No. 1.—How the World Was Made.

—

Before the dawn of time, the Mayor sat in his office and said to himself, “I should like to have a city to be Mayor of, and I should like to have a world to contain the city and supply its department stores with imported goods.”

So the Mayor summoned all the powers invested in him by virtue of his office, and he created a Contract. And in the Contract were specified all the materials and measurements of the city, and of the world in which it was to be built.

And when he had created the Contract, the Mayor said, “It is not good for the Mayor to be alone.” So the Mayor created Woman to be his wife, and he created Man to be the woman’s brother, and he awarded the Contract to the brother-in-law whom he had created.

But the brother-in-law said in his heart, “I will grow fat on the profits of this Contract.” And he procured materials greatly inferior to those that were specified in the Contract, and he submitted false expense reports to the Mayor, and the project ran sore over budget.

And that is how the world came to be made of inferior materials sloppily put together. And the mayor looked at the world, and behold, it was very bad. So the Mayor ordered an investigation into the construction of the world, and that investigation is still going on today. And whenever you feel the wind blowing through the tall buildings downtown, you know that the investigation is taking testimony from expert witnesses.

For BB pals Gil and Steph, here's a fan-made video for alt-country group Lambchop's wonderful folky, loungy cover of "This Corrosion," the epic 1987 triumph of goth bombast by The Sisters of Mercy. And if it makes you yearn for some Sisters, check out the original video below.

As you can probably tell, the What's New On Netflix RSS feeds have been long overdue for some tender love and care. Since I launched the site, I've reprogrammed most of it three times. The RSS feeds, though, have been running off the same creaky code since the start.

Well, that changes today. The RSS feeds have been entirely redone and integrated into the new site code, meaning that they'll have the same accuracy (and stability!) as the rest of the site.

The only downside is that the location of the feeds themselves are changing, so whatever program or website you're using to read the feeds will need to be updated. The new feeds are located as follows:

Daily digest: can.whatsnewonnetflix.com/feeds/digest

Individual releases: can.whatsnewonnetflix.com/feeds/individual

The new RSS feeds also mean I can be much more flexible in terms of what information is included in the feeds. If you have any suggestions for things you'd like to see in the feeds, let me know!

- Aaron (aaron@whatsnewonnetflix.com)

Submitted by: abyjim

Everyday kitchen items are transformed into musical instruments in the musical short, “My Dubstep Kitchen.” The film was shot & edited by Sawyer Hartman and stars Joe Penna (MysteryGuitarMan).

via Viral Viral Videos

We all know the downside of actually listening to lyrics of a catchy pop tune.  That’s right, you’ll realize the lyrics are wack, the song is ruined, and now you’re likely pissed-off at whoever wrote and/or sang it.

Case in point, Miquel’s ‘How Many Drinks’.  Let’s examine the lyrics, shall we?

Frustration, watching you dance
Invitation, to get in them pants
Come closer baby, so I can touch
One question, am I movin’ too fast?

Cause I ain’t leavin alone, feel like I could be honest, babe!
We both know that we’re grown
That’s why I wanna know 
How many drinks would it take you to leave with me?

Here’s what I’ve gleaned from the song thus far… Miquel has identified a person he’s sexually attracted to.  He’d like to take this person home for the purposes of sex, but he’s not sure said person will agree to his plan in their current sober state.  As such, he’s asking said person to ballpark how much alcohol they’ll need to consume to agree to his plan.  Hmmm… that sounds damn shady.  Perhaps I’ve made a mistake?

Yeah, you look good and I got money
But I don’t wanna waste my time
Back of my mind I’m hopin’ you say two or three
You look good, we came to party 
But I don’t wanna waste my time

Temptation, is calling your name
Sweet persuasion, baby this is a game
Come closer, baby, if you like what you hear
Impression, is what I’m makin you feel

Cause I ain’t leavin alone, feel like I could be honest, babe!

We both know that we’re grown
That’s why I wanna know 
How many drinks would it take you to leave with me?
Yeah, you look good and I got money
But I don’t wanna waste my time
Back of my mind I’m hopin you say two or three
You look good, we came to party 
But I don’t wanna waste my time (waste my time)

No… no… seems I was correct.  Miquel realizes his plan hinges on plying the person he’s attracted to with booze.  Miquel is hoping that it will only take 2 or 3 drinks – not because he’s cheap or poor, mind you!  Oh no, he’s “…got plenty of money”.  Miquel is hoping ‘seal the deal’ in the time it takes said person to ingest 2-3 cocktails, because Miquel is a busy man who doesn’t want his time wasted.  Miquel “…ain’t leaving here alone…”.  So, if the first person he tries to get liquored-up is a no-go, he’ll need to move on to - presumably - person #2.  Plan B, if you will.

Now, whatever you think of Miquel at this point, Miquel would like you to know he’s open-minded.

No, no, no
I ain’t judgin
If you do decide that you might be fuckin’ tonight, what?
More power to you if you do decide that you might be fuckin’ tonight

You see, if said person does decide to engage in sex with Miquel, he won’t think that person  is a whore.  How nice.

This next part of the song is a bit…. well… there’s a odd paleontology reference, he likes your ass (bonus?), appreciates your workout regime, and seems to wish he had a set of breasts like yours?

Le-le-let me dig that out like a fossil
Damn baby that ass is colossal
Pilates a mill did that body so good 
You’ve gotten a pair I wish I could

…and then we’re back to the whole how-much-alcohol-will-it-take-for-you-to-have-sex-with-me thing…

How many drinks would it take you to leave with me? 
You look good and we came to party but I don’t wanna waste my time. 
Back of my mind I’m hopin you say two or three
Agree? Indeed
You look good and we came to party but don’t wanna waste my time,
Or waste your time, or waste your time, or waste our time
Baby it’s alright, baby it’s alright, baby it’s alright
Oh it’s alright now, alright, oh yeah
I don’t wanna waste my time
I don’t wanna waste no time
I don’t wanna waste your time
I don’t wanna waste our time, 
Or my time

How many drinks would it take you to leave with me?
Yeah, you look good and I got money
But I don’t wanna waste my time
Back of my mind I’m hopin you say two or three
You look good, we came to party 
But I don’t wanna waste my time (waste my time)

…but remember, Miquel’s not judgey…

No, no, no
I ain’t judgin
If you do decide that you might be fuckin’ tonight, what?
More power to you if you do decide that my might be fuckin’ tonight
I ain’t judgin
If you do decide that you might be fuckin’ tonight, what?
More power to you if you do decide that my might be fuckin’ tonight

Let’s go, shit
You only live once right?
I mean, where’s the fun in forever anyway?

What the fuck am I listening to?!

A group of French Canadian thrill seekers have a blast as they launch a speeding car over railroad tracks and plow it straight into the side of an RV. It’s a lot like watching an episode of The Dukes of Hazzard.

video via P1RAnAZ

via reddit, Daily of the Day

On 04-08-13 Florence Police Motor Officer Troy Gurley attempted to stop a vehicle driven by Justin O. Sanders, 24, for traffic violations. The vehicle refused to stop. Mr. Sanders led police on a chase through the City of Florence and was subsequently charged with various drug, firearms, and traffic violations. Mr. Sanders is presumed innocent until proven guilty.