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28 Apr 19:36

A Tale of Two Hipsters

A 10,000 word essay on what the term hipster means.

“Bohemia. A desert country near the sea.”

-William Shakespeare

Part I: A Tale of Two Bicycles

   Around 2008, speeding down 7th Avenue from Central Park in New York City, weaving in and out of traffic I had reached my destination at 24th Street only to lift the bike to the curb and have the wheel bound away from me and down into the street. A quick-release joint on the axle had worn loose. It didn’t cost me much to replace. But the event made me afraid of something similar happening– namely, that one day, after all the hard riding, the old frame would crack or split at some critical juncture and I would be flung head first into traffic. It seemed sensible to get something new. But I didn’t have the money so the worry soon dissolved into a vague interest in new bikes I noticed on the street.

   A few years later, I was on Bedford Avenue, the main drag of Williamsburg, in “South” Williamsburg, a few blocks north of the bridge (I lived ten blocks below it) outside the fin-de-siecle themed bar that didn’t have a name, or rather, as per the “speak-easy” trend, the only place you could find its secret appellation was on a tiny monographed creme-colored business card the hostess gave you which read, “Maison Premiere”, or as my girlfriend at the time affectionately called it, “First House”

   Because the bar was next to my laundromat I would see the owner all the time, nervously rushing in and out. He looked like an enormous, athletic, and stylish version of R. Crumb– if one can picture that. He dressed, to match his bar and Crumb, in old timey style, adroitly tailored suits, six hundred dollar boots, carefully trimmed and parted mustache, and leather suspenders. All of his companions dressed like this as well, their heads shaved brutally close to the skull on the back and sides in an untapered straight line that left long strands on top. This was the unisex haircut that had taken Williamsburg by storm, unironically referred to as, “The Hitler Youth”. Recently, having jettisoned the name, it has entered the mainstream

   It wasn’t a bad place, which is saying a lot for Williamsburg, which was and is full of bad places. I think the bar imagined itself as a place where successful people pretended to be wealthy, but in fact, like most New York City locales, it was a place where wealthy people pretended to be successful. I had parked my bike on a signpost and on the other side, I noticed, was another bike. Placing my bike alongside it created an uncanny doubling effect. The vision was slightly magical, and I paused dumbfounded. The bike was my bike– but not quite. It was like looking into an enchanted mirror, not through a glass darkly, but rather from the glass darkly out into the bright and shimmering realm on the other side. It was an idealized version of my bike, new and flawless. Though this was not just on account of paint and gloss. The design of the frame itself had been cleaned up, the lines reduced and refined. Tiny details, like the ugly little metal nubs that held my brake cables had been replaced by brushed metal clamps. The cables themselves were smaller. Holes for finicky attachments and several lesser crossbars were missing. Then there was the object as a whole. My bike, an accumulation of crooked triangles, had been subtly shifted into one smooth even fashion forward parallelogram.

   I wrote down the brand naively thinking I had finally found the inexpensive replacement for my frame I had been looking for all these years. But I soon discovered my error. The copy was a $7000 custom-designed frame imported directly from Japan. The price on the internet, with all the trimmings, the rims, the gears, the pedals, the Brooks’ saddle leather seat, easily topped $10,000. Like the “minimalist” luxury lofts growing to shade my own cheaper shabby claustrophobic junk-filled apartment, all the pieces were designed so that the consumer could have physically less for some insubstantial rarified “more”. What was going on? Why would someone spend $9500 additional dollars to have a bike that looked like a slightly cleaner version of my own bike? And why was I involved? Why did I see a copy of my own bike, an object whose outward appearance, and in fact very existence, I regarded hardly as a piece of haute couture but a hard-scrabble mix of necessity and accident? It did not seem a coincidence, on the contrary, on some unconscious level I expected it. It felt only natural. But why?

   In his In Defense of Lost Causes, the philosopher Slavoj Zizek describes a common but often unspoken modern belief– that the contemporary world is so complex it is impossible to apprehend and so therefore impossible to change on a grand scale. Rather, all that remains to us is the confusion of subjectivity and heightened focus on elaborate detail:

Things look bad for Causes today, in a “postmodern” era when, although the ideological scene is fragmented into a panoply of positions which struggle for hegemony, there is an underlying consensus: the era of big explanations is over, we need ‘weak thought’, opposed to all foundationalism, a thought attentive to the 'rhizomatic’ texture of reality, in politics, too, we should not longer aim at all-explaining systems and global emancipatory projects; the violent imposition of grand solutions should leave room for forms of specific resistance and intervention… If the reader feels a minimum of sympathy with these lines, she should stop reading and cast aside this volume.

   The best example of Zizek’s description is your Facebook “feed” which offers an endless tangled flow of meaningless information mixed with “campaigns”, and “up worthy” causes each posted by a “friend” and reflecting their personal viewpoint. The reign of an African warlord is juxtaposed with a failing bakery, ten things only an 80s girl knows, personal complaints, an article about trending microaggressions, and so forth. How are we to pick our battles? “Well,” we concede, “the world is so complex I can never understand it and neither can anyone else so I should just focus on what I ‘like’. There is no clear unified vision about what is going on, just a jumble of stuff that I ‘like’ or don’t ‘like’. I’m just lucky to be in the position I’m in, but I certainly wouldn’t know how to change things.” However this viewpoint is an illusion, successful in part because it inspires paralysis.

   Likewise in an Op-Ed in The New York Times last week entitled “ My So-Called Opinions”, an N.Y.U. student claims his generation is not “lazy” or “narcissistic” but in fact  “civilly and politically” disengaged because they are all hopelessly confused by a deluge of information which is impossible to parse using the obligatory subjective toolkit of moral relativism.

   To lead us out of N.Y.U’s fog let’s reverse this analysis as Zizek does by flipping the proverbial notion of “Ablata causa tolluntur effectua: when the cause is absent, the effects thrive” into “When the cause intervenes, the effects are dispelled”. Let us suppose, for a moment, that the world is not inherently rhizomatic, (that is to say, like Facebook, infinitely-pronged, ever in flux, continually in the process of creation and destruction, unsourced, unknowable) but in fact, fundamentally apprehensible. Moreover, we need not be blinded by a cloud of effects behind which are indistinct lattices of causes. We can just suppose that the cloud of effects has one simple cause– to confuse what has traditionally been the most radical element in society since the enlightenment– young, liberal, educated, university students. That is to say, we can dismiss the objective precept of subjectivity by considering it ideology in the classical Marxist sense– a prevailing paradigm of ideas and values masquerading as patent truth though in fact it is merely the means by which the ruling class perpetuates the status quo. In this sense, the paralysis of subjectivity is no more correct than the divine right of kings or the inherent slavishness of a group of people that happen to be your slaves. Here of course,  we can recognize the irony. The analytical tool invented by Marx– the comparative study of the subjectivity of different societies ideologies– is agglomerated together to create our own.

   This essay is an effort to use critical analysis to unravel the term “hipster” into a lattice of ideas that is clear, makes plain sense, and so therefore explains things which before to us seemed hopelessly tangled. Most articles on this topic claim the term is unknowable. This is because the word, like the entire notion of indefinable rhizomic culture movements, is ideology. It is the means by which an outside group has defined, divided, and de-legitimized the radical in our present generation.

   I had moved to New York City in the mid-2000s for a mixture of economic and artistic reasons. The economy was bigger in New York so I reasoned I was more likely to find steady work. I also thought I would find a large arts community in which to participate. However, calling myself an “artist” was difficult and confusing in New York City because it referred to two groups of people. One group was more or less like myself, people working minimum wage day jobs or selling artistic services piecemeal as 1099-MISC contractors. The other group of people where folks who were faced with the same quandary– work an unfulfilling middle (or more likely lower) class job or become a “successful” artist. However, this second group of people were wealthy enough to buy their own reality. Wealthy New York people made up a number of careers using this method, however some form of artistic career was the most popular choice, possibly second only to being the director of a vague Non-Profit organization. All the trappings of an artist, “exposure”, studios, leisure time to work, Masters Degrees, and so forth could be bought. Money had nothing to do with the term. The label was not a “career” since no artists made a significant amount of money.

   This may seem bizarre, but it is in fact a very natural consequence of the economic landscape of our generation. Most of us do not have real jobs. Most of us do not personally accumulate any wealth. The recession continues. However, our parents generation presided over the largest accumulation of personal wealth in all of human history. Our impoverished landscape is distorted by their wealth and influence.

   Already the tangle does indeed seem complex and it is. But it’s not impossibly complex. It would be so nice and tidy if the hereditarily poor artists in New York City frequented the laundromat and not the fin-de-siecle bar next door and the hereditarily rich artists frequented the fin-de-siecle bar and not the laundromat.But it turns out both groups of people frequented both places. However, it’s as good as place as any to start. To begin to unravel this knot in which two classes each pretend they are one another and both claim to have illusory careers that don’t make any money and possibly don’t exist at all let’s return to the bikes and the highrises and the landscape. Let’s look at the idea of Williamsburg’s “gentrification” and work our way outward from there.

I offer the following analysis of the phenomenon:

  1. A manufacturing boom lasts 30 years or so in a particular city but then moves on elsewhere. The nature of capitalism mines out short term gain while sacrificing long term stability.
  2. A creative class of impoverished (and generally socialist) artists move to an economically depressed urban area devastated by the process described in step 1 (an old factory district where there is infrastructure but no longer jobs so the housing is cheap). Often times, they live among minorities because (if they are not minorities themselves), unlike others in the housing market, these generally liberal people do not regard this idea as a negative.
  3. Young urban professionals collect the avant garde ideas and art generated by the creative class and commodify them into marketable products to sell to the upper class and other middle class professionals.
  4. Their efforts convince their fellow middle class professionals to spend their excess income on conspicuous consumption– a continually moving target called “style”. In this system, “style” can be defined as avant garde ideas and works of art generated by the creative class which are then transformed into marketable commodities by other middle class professionals (marketers). Style is cheap to sell because it is intangible. Moreover, it is always in demand because it is defined by its novelty.
  5. The original area where the artists settle itself becomes “stylish” and is no longer a place where art is made but a place where artistic and cutting edge products and food are sold. The bombed out factory studios themselves undergo this commodification– transforming “artists lofts” in to “luxury lofts” sold at exorbitant rates (because they are soaked in intangible “style”) to middle class professionals with nine to five jobs.
  6. The artists flee to a new location. The people who lived in the area prior to the gentrification are also driven out, or, if they are lucky enough to have owned their property, benefit from the rise in housing prices. The area becomes chintzy, boring, and ugly. The same insatiable swarming market forces have now chewed it over twice, once as a factory district, then as a fashionable factory district.
  7. The artists settle in a new location soon pursued by the marketers looking to collect their new ideas and sell them as the latest form of style. The nature of capitalism mines out short term gain while sacrificing long term stability.

   Looking at gentrification from this perspective clears up all sorts of small mysteries. For example, we can now decode why Whole Foods are always located in ancient factories in which they lovingly preserve the machinery and artifacts of that era. It also clues us in to a lot of the imagery in rock n’roll. We can understand why Morrissey is always singing about the iron bridges, mouldering infrastructure, and “ugly new houses” of Manchester– a city which was the first example of a large scale industrial boom and bust in human history. It sheds light on why the Mod and Punk youth counter-culture centered around Joy Division in the late 70s and early 80s sprung from that landscape of all places. It even explains why the Beatles moved to the post-industrial and economically devastated port town of Hamburg to start their career in rock n’roll. The Fab Four arrived in an industrial slum, dressed in skinny trousers, put on raybans, starting playing rock shows for the art students there, then had themselves photographed among crumbling iron and brick wrought by a century of commerce. Sound familiar?

   This process is most evident in New York, where all New Yorkers regard it as a plain fact of life or a pattern in which to anticipate real estate prices and invest in property. Bohemia has moved steadily east across the lower half of Manhattan Island– beginning in the 50s and 60s in Greenwich Village, meandering with Warhol to the Flat Iron and Chelsea, then to the East Village in the 60s and 70s, Soho and Noho in the 80s, the Lower East Side in the 90s, and at last jumping over the river in desperation to land in Williamsburg in the 90s and early 2000s. Now that Williamsburg is more or less “over”, the front has moved to Bushwick and pushed upwards to Greenpoint. Bushwick used to be called “East Williamsburg”, a fictional name to market apartments. Since Williamsburg is no longer trendy and Bushwick is cool, the appellation has fallen out of favor among developers.

   What remains in the wake of this wandering “coast of bohemia”? Much lamented, potent, pure, and undiluted consumerism. Fancy restaurants, expensive stores, shopping districts, and “luxury artist loft” apartments for those who want to pay a premium to have this catalog of rarefied delicacies at their fingertips. In the film Hannah and Her Sisters (1986) one can see the bohemian intellectual characters ambling through a Soho so blighted it looks exactly like Bushwick. Today, those same streets are shopping malls. But that term does not do the area justice since it can’t express how those streets are now the most splendid luxury item shopping zone in all the nation where corporations vie for power with fleets of “flagship stores”.

   This phenomenon is not unique to New York. The same thing is happening in Baltimore, where I currently live, and probably in many other cities all over the world. About ten or fifteen years ago, my generation moved into a crumbling warehouse district in another blighted area of Baltimore City. The DIY artist warehouse district is now labelled “The Arts & Entertainment District”, housing prices are on the rise and everywhere there are signs advertising “elegant urban living” and “artists luxury lofts” to people who are obviously not artists but rather middle class professionals.

   However, these are all minor points. What this view of gentrification really provides us with is a clear vantage point to look at a very big and unjust misunderstanding: why artists as “hipsters” are hated.

    We have been misidentified.[1] Specifically, two species have been conflated together under one label.

    We are confused with the people who spend their money to look, dress, and talk exactly like us for the purpose of showing off their conspicuous wealth and status.

    This causes different groups of people to hate us for different reasons.To those who lived in the impoverished neighborhoods before we arrived, we are harbingers of this race of locusts. Or perhaps a better metaphor: It’s like hating the sight of rabbits because you know they will soon attract wolves and foxes so rapacious they will make the land uninhabitable. Except in our case, after the wolves kill the rabbits they wear their skin in a grotesque masquerade.

   To the middle class who are not interested in style, we are confused with the ultra-consumerist middle class who emulate us. For example, I once invited two of my middle class professional friends, a husband and wife, to a performance at a DIY art space in Baltimore. The husband said sure, but the wife felt uncomfortable. “I’m coming from work” she said. “All the hipsters there would judge me because of how I’m dressed.” I was astonished. “They’re freaks!” I objected. “They look and dress in a totally crazy way because they are genuinely crazy and eccentric and cannot help it! The last thing I’ve ever seen them do is take any sort of interest in how someone else is dressed or looks!  In fact, because they’re all such weirdos they’re the most accepting group of people I’ve ever met except possibly for Star Trek nerds and most of them are Star Trek nerds!” No, she insisted saying she wasn’t coming. “Hipsters are snooty and judgmental.” I knew she was wrong but I also knew where she had gotten that impression. She was confusing the artists with the people who buy the image of the artist in hipster costume shops like American Apparel and Urban Outfitters to feel superior to other people– to chase the ever retreating sea coast of Bohemia.

   Lastly, the hipster is the means by which we might hate ourselves. He is the “other” in our society, the only stereotype, the only class slur which is not only socially acceptable to say but in fact celebrated. When a comedian in a skinny suit, or an artist at a party, or a middle class professional out for a cocktail at someplace like “Maison Premiere”, or really anyone anytime utters, “I hate hipsters”, heads nod in assent. The declaration of hatred is affirmed. We condemn as a group. But who are we condemning? Some hypothetical agglomeration of character traits? Or some of those traits chopped up into pieces and sprinkled in ourselves? We utter hipster’s name as a magical incantation to separate him from us, to assure us that we in fact are not infected by the taint of his intangible, elusive, and strange presence.

Part II: Why (God) is it happening?

i. The First Counter Culture

   To understand this last form of hatred– which is the most prevalent and complex– we must understand why counter-culture is aped by the middle class via capitalism and so we must look more closely at what exactly bohemian counterculture is, how it emerged, and why this nexus formed between it and factories/industrialization. Luckily, modern society is a relatively recent invention so these roots are easy to trace. Only a few generations separate us from mid-19th century Europe, when the factory first appeared, and with it industrialized society and the first modern counter-class of intellectuals and artists called “romantics”. Romantics wanted to radically transform Europe into a more liberal, tolerant and egalitarian society. They were the first modern socialists, anarchists, and feminists. They were also the first to offer a cogent expression of the most common and persistent popular objections to capitalism– that it is ugly, impersonal, anti-artistic (in the sense that it deprives the worker of the satisfaction of work), and worst of all– it suffers (to borrow the term) from “a failure of imagination”. It myopically focuses on the practical and quantifiable while ignoring or marginalizing the humanities and with them, larger, more difficult, societal goals. (Think, for example, of the hideous 19th century landscape of iron factories or today’s indifferent corporate sculptures, strip malls, and highways. Think of President Obama [channelling Dickens’ Mr. Gradgrind] groping for lighthearted economic advice to graduates, and having his joke settle on the usual grim and cold calculation, “I promise you folks can make a lot more, potentially, with skilled manufacturing or the trades than they might with an art history degree.”)

   Likewise, from Rousseau onwards the romantics offered the first alternative arguments to the Lockean notion that political freedom and equality was somehow linked with the freedom to conduct business. Recall that the grand fallacy of the Iraq War was not that of fact (the missing W.M.D.s) but of political philosophy. George W. Bush had reasoned from first principles that once he brought economic “freedom” to Iraq, democracy would soon follow as night follows day. Just this past month, with the invasion of Crimea, American foreign policy was once again startled to the same rude ideological awakening. The introduction of capitalism in Russia has not brought democracy. Rather, in fact, as many Russian poets and intellectuals have pointed out– quite the opposite. Capitalism created and supports the tyranny of Putin and his “oligarchs”, the solution should have been functional socialism, they argued. (Note, how we politely disguise this unpalatable idea in our terms. We do not say Putin and his “business men”.)  

   The push for democracy in 19th century Europe was often an intellectual push, an artistic movement full of young writers and painters. They ultimately lost and for the most part the merchant class replaced the nobility. Or if those that took up their cause won, their efforts to create a society founded on certain rigid ideals of equality and beauty tipped into Fascism. The populist dictator Napoleon wrote an unsuccessful romantic novel before he tried his hand at being Emperor. Beethoven almost dedicated his third symphony to him and Byron his poems–  until it became evident their hero had betrayed his democratic ideals. According to conservative theorists, the Bohemian working class socialism of artists, writers, and musicians will always tip into authoritarianism. In his History of Western Philosophy the mathematician Bertrand Russell states flatly, as if it were a logical proof, that the socialist Rousseau and the romantics will always evolve into dictators like Napoleon and (failed painter) Hitler. This notion caused G. K. Chesterton to ironically propose the creation of a  “philosopher policeman” who goes to “artistic tea parties to detect pessimists” and investigate “books of sonnets”.

    And it is true that the creative class have always been at the center of radical philosophy. Since the birth of modern democracy, there has been a consistent countervailing socialist argument that a different sort of fair system can be created that does not allow industrialized capitalism to run rampant. Because the romantics lost the political struggle, they are not remembered so much for their politics as for their art. They were obsessed with fantasy, fairy tales, personal introspection, emotion, beauty, the transcendent, and tying those ideals up in unparalleled paintings, novels, and musical compositions. This is, of course, how we use the term “romantic” today. But this description can also just as easily apply to all the artistic counter-culture movements which followed theirs, including the current one. The romantics’ politics were likewise idealistic. They were a creative class and so were not satisfied with the idea that a new better form of society could not be created. Today in urban centers, there is a similar group of people– intellectuals and artists who want to live their life in search of some transcendent ideal expressed through the perfection of their art. These people are generally liberal and socialist and hold similar ideals for change. They are called “hipsters” and confused with their very opposite– the middle class workers who most ardently embrace the status quo. This uncanny middle class “hipster” dedicates his or her life to acquiring capital and then uses that capital to acquire material possessions in an effort to conform. Middle class hipster buys what he is expected to buy, just as he is living the life society expects him to live– that of a wage earner. And yet these two sorts of people who are polar opposites are grouped under the same term. How that is possible is a unique historical product of American ideology.

ii. American Counter Culture

    In her books of essays, The Hearts of Men, Barbara Ehrenreich sets out to create a feminist theory by looking past the narrow strictures of gender norms and societal expectations that hemmed in women in the latter half of the 20th century to instead study the ones that confined the men. She finds that in the 50s and 60s American men married early, (the average age in the late 50s was 23) and only remained childless bachelors at the risk of being labelled psychologically aberrant, or as she quotes Philip Roth’s in My Life as a Man (1974)

…a young college-educated bourgeois male of my generation who scoffed at the idea of marriage for himself, who would just as soon eat out of cans or in a cafeteria, sweep his own floor, make his own bed, come and go with no binding legal attachments, finding female friendship and sexual adventure when he could and for no longer than he liked, laid himself open the charge of "immaturity” if not “latent” or blatant “homosexuality”. Or he was just plain “selfish.” or was “frightened of responsibility.” or he could not “commit himself” (nice institutional phrase, that) to a “permanent relationship.”

    The psychiatric establishment understood man to only reach his full potential when he became “mature”, that is to say when he married, fathered children, and began providing for them. Books like The Mature Mind, whose thesis was that all human progress was accomplished through “maturity”, propelled this idea into the popular culture. Other modes of behavior were aberrant and, because they fell short of attaining true manhood, ultimately effeminate. The unmarried man had stopped along the road somewhere and dithered. Perhaps, in the Freudian schema, he had been so overly-mothered and focused on his boyhood he had become homosexual. But more often than not, he had simply failed to assume his role and became vaguely de-masculated like Noel, the bohemian Greenwich Village dwelling hero of the novel Marjorie Morningstar. At the end of the novel, Noel eschews marriage, only to end his freewheeling odyssey as a kept pet of an older woman, who, in obscene reversal of roles, provides him with financial support. The heroine of the book, Marjorie, who has pursued Noel through all it’s pages, becomes disgusted at the sight of Noel in an apron preparing dishes, and goes home to marry a stable breadwinner. In short, there was no real contemporary social alternative for men who did not want to marry and father children. This forced most men to accept economic and societal conformity or as Gore Vidal said, “Once a man has a wife and two young children, he will do what you tell him to. He will obey you. And that is the aim of the entire masculine role.” Life outside this role in mid-20th century America was to be something less than a man.

    In fiction, men chafed at this idea, but could not find a way out. In Richard Yates’ Revolutionary Road, an accidental pregnancy forces the protagonist Frank Wheeler to abandon bachelorhood, Greenwich Village, and his dreams of becoming a writer. Soon ensconced in a salaried job at an IBM-like computer company and a suburban tract house in Connecticut, Wheeler mocks the shallowness of his existence situated on the ironically named “Revolutionary Road” but cannot escape it. Plans are made to abscond to Paris, but ultimately, afraid of the uncertainty of an alternative lifestyle, Wheeler accepts a raise at his corporate job and remains unhappily in place. Likewise, in John Updike’s Rabbit, Run, the teenage Rabbit Angstrom cannot see a way out of an unwanted pregnancy and the resultant marriage and can only make a mad hopeless dash for the horizon.

   Interestingly enough, the first real alternative for men outside of Greenwich Village was not articulated by a popular counter-culture movement, but, Ehrenreich shows us, by Hugh Hefner. Playboy Magazine sold a lifestyle in which men would not waste the excess income generated by the corporate jobs on wife and children, but rather on bachelor pads equipped with every item advertised in the pages of the magazine, all denoting and defining a particular rarefied mixture or modernity and masculinity. High end razors, liquors, cameras, sporting goods, sports cars, hi-fi stereo equipment, cologne, watches, stylish clothes, and the sleek modern apartments themselves, all denoted a new different way of living that made a clean break from the past. Moreover, they were meant to be used as tools of seduction, a means by which a man could display his wealth and status to convince women to sleep with him. Prior to Playboy, what defined and created a man was his wife and child and, as a corollary, his ability to earn a wage to support them. If a man did not have these things, he was most likely not a man at all and a sort of effeminized homosexual, like Noel cooking in the kitchen, relying on a woman for his support. Hefner crafted a much needed alternative vision, a man was defined by the items he possessed. He still earned a wage, but instead of using this wage to support and wife a child, he bought a sort of negative space called a “bachelor pad” which, once filled with all the latest gadgets and accoutrements could attract and fit an endless procession of young and beautiful women. Just like the last ideal of masculinity, however, this system created a damning corollary— if one did not earn enough money to acquire all the symbols of manhood displayed for sale in the magazine, one was not really a man. In this schema, poor men were unmanly men, thus forcing them to conform, in a different way, to societal and capitalist requirements.

    Ehrenreich explains hows America’s first real modern counter-culture movement, that of the Beats, emerged as both a reaction to the “bread winners and losers” conformist ideal of the 50s and the Playboy lifestyle. It forced a third way, rejecting both these visions of what defined a “real man”. It was a masculine movement, one which, at its core, like Hefner’s, was a rejection of the burden of domesticity, of wife and child. On the Road’s main character, Dean, abandons his wife and newborn child. Boroughs accidentally shoots his wife. Then for them, life begins. The Beats were iconoclastic in a very literal sense; they were symbol breaking. A man was allowed to leave his wife, leave his job, become a shiftless “Dharma Bum” and still, despite his impecuniousness, get laid. In fact, he could even sleep with men and still sleep with many beautiful women. Sex was decoupled from money. Masculinity was decoupled from sexual preference. They created a totally new self-image of manhood, an image that was a total and infuriating rejection of Playboy’s vision: a man could be a bum and still have plenty of sex. Why? Because his virtues, if he had any, were internal, artistic, and intellectual.

    Ehrenreich’s shows, quite brilliantly, how this idea enraged the essayists and editorialists in Playboy. It also horrified those who clung to the more traditional vision of a man as a breadwinner. To those who saw the Beat lifestyle as a threat, the Beat became the diminutive “Beatnik” parodied in television and mass media. The Beatnik was spacy substanceless, always “vibing” out, and focused on trifles. He was in essence a ditz. Like any ideological attack, this hollowed out vision of him mirrored his persecutors who themselves were insecure about the Beats critique of the middle class breadwinner and the striving, all-buying, Playboy ladies’ men. To the Beats, record players, cologne, razors, pants, shirts, and all the junk Playboy required of you was trifling trash that got in the way of real legitimate desires, some over-the-horizon, untrammelled, immanence. The notion of raising children in middle class suburbia felt to them, even more patently hollow and unfulfilling. The Beats were depicted as having ridiculously silly priorities because those who depicted them, when they regarded the Beats, secretly felt that way about themselves.

    Previously, I referred to the wage earners who emulated Artist Hipsters as “middle class hipsters”, but this is an inaccurate term. Some Artist Hipsters are middle class. Some “middle class” hipsters are upper class or striving working class. “Middle class hipsters” are better defined as “Hefner Hipsters”. The key difference is inside their heads. They hold in their minds some mixture of the ideal of the old conservative status quo (“settle down, raise a family”) and the newer version invented by Heffner et al. in the 1950s (“your manhood, your womanhood, your personhood is defined by what you own, by the items you buy, by your "individual style”). Being a man or woman in this schema depends on owning certain essential products. Artist Hipsters, like their many counter-culture progenitors, offer one of the few viable alternative modes of thinking and being– define yourself by the art you make or other intellectual pursuits.

    The Beats were not so easily transformed into an image that could be hollowed out and sold by mainstream capitalist society (or perhaps, simply, the machinery just wasn’t yet fully in place). But the successive generations of American counter-culture intellectual/artist movements were not so lucky. Capitalism learned to hoover up counter-culture as quickly as possible and eject it as airy and insubstantial Playboy-style dander. By the magic alchemy of marketing, capitalism took the motive force in counter-culture movements (dissatisfaction in people’s heart about the way society is structured and their place in the structure) and transmuted it, quite literally, into balms, oils, and potions you can buy to feel better.

    The term “Hippie” began as a derisive 1950s corruption of “hipster” which itself was another pejorative term for a shallow, style, obsessed “Beatnik”. Ehrenreich writes of how the new focus of the nascent Hippie movement on enjoyment, permission, and self-discovery was an easy target for consumerism, which at it’s core is about the place where pleasure meets permission. As I discussed in my previous essay on Batman, at the heart of capitalist marketing is the idea of enjoyment. Zizek asks us to think about what the Coke can means when it commands you to “Enjoy!”. It is an invitation, yes, but, like with Playboy, the polite suggestion also comes with a darker corollary. It assumes the authority of a gatekeeper, giving you permission to enjoy and telling you when enjoyment is appropriate. In short, the product usurps the role that to you is quite burdensome, that of your super-ego. If you a buy a coke, you have worked to find the means to buy the coke. If you now possess the can because you have bought it, go ahead, “Enjoy!”. If you do not possess the can you will not/should not “Enjoy!”. If we do not have the can to tell us when to enjoy, and more importantly, when to stop enjoying,  the question becomes very difficult. Should we live like the Beat or the Hippie? Staring at the beauty of the flower and humping all day for free forever? When do we stop enjoying and conform to the expectations of society?

   We recognize this same bag of tricks in the Playboy scheme, setting sexual enjoyment behind the goalpost of certain products and necessitating hard work and salary to be able to partake of its delights. Likewise, as the marketer skims the surface appearance of the Artist Hipster, his manner of dress, his habits, his mode of transportation, and sells them to the Hefner Hipster as the most current and so necessary item, he also imports the idea that the item he is selling is the gateway to a particular luxury or lifestyle discovered by Artist Hipster in his creative free-thinking studies. But of course to those on the other side of this, what is going on is clear– someone is painting with the colors of our generation in order to hawk sandwiches, coffee, and cocktails.

   The Hippie exists, if anywhere today, in food marketing. His bloody radical ghost haunts all of high-end Whole Foods pointing like Banquo at yogurt cups, tiny cartons of designer ice cream, seven dollar juices, lip balm, herbal remedies or really anything that is supposed to “naturally” support your “whole body”. The yoga mat toted by the young urban professional is another old guard Hippie product. The soul-seeking boundlessness of the Hippie’s imported yogis and yoga slips (the whole body’s wellness penetrating the fourth and fifth dimension) very easily into a system in which physical and mental well-being is chopped up into discrete segments you can buy by the hour.

    We see now why Hefner Hipster does what he does. To him, everything is behind this gate-keeper, all enjoyment, regulated by permissible norms and appropriate standards which are dictated to him. He is ever-striving, ever-earning, ever-buying to glean this permission, and from that permission, his appropriate amount of pleasure. Manhattan and Williamsburg are now filled with these people, who just like Frank Wheeler in Revolutionary Road sixty years ago, work at growing technology companies and their other corporate equivalents. Those who do not spend their excess salary on a wife and child in Connecticut remain in the city, chasing Hefner’s ideal of buying the latest items and defining their personhood by their possessions. But of course, in a sort of grand capitalist tradition, this is a moving goalpost, a horizon which, however quickly Hefner Hipster travels he will never truly surmount. The line moves as he chases it. Just like the pictures of the naked ladies sitting behind the gloss of their pages, having them is somehow, at that very instant, not having them. There is a gap in attainment, at the heart of consumption a dissatisfaction which consumes, a void.

Part III: (Behind the) Counter Counter Culture

   Is this divide between Artist Hipster and Hefner Hipster always neat and tidy? No, of course not. Like the term “style” or “class”, “hipster” is designed to deny itself. It is a vague entangled quantum, which, if ever reduced from a cloud of possibility to a certain figure, will wink out of existence because its real raison d’etre is confusion. Perhaps the most distorting element, is the upper class, who can become anyone they want by spending money. Some wealthy people, as has always been the case, become artists and pursue the ideals of the romantics and the counter-culture. Many wealthy people use their capital to live in Williamsburg as perfect Hefner Hipsters, buying every item that seems necessary for them to be living a narrowly cultivated life. Artists who make work want and need to be successful to make money. This means that artists actively sell their work to marketers, though they are the bottom of this system of exploitation. And of course, there are also bad artists, who believe art is making something that will sell among Hefner Hipsters. Now, at least, we see the color of the threads and can untangle the fin-de-siecle bar and the laundromat, where upper, middle, and lower classes of artists and urban professionals all pretend to be one another. It makes sense now why kids aspiring to be tech millionaires in San Francisco are called hipsters as much as young homeless hippie artists sleeping in bathtubs at Occupy Wall Street.

    It is easy to blame and mock Hefner Hipster as he scoots around town on his $10,000 bicycle (obviously, here, someone from the upper class!). But we should not. We think we see it clearly! Not, as I first regarded it, as the other side of a dark mirror, not an idealization at all, but a hilarious, grotesque, and ignorant aping. He has come to roost in Williamsburg like he came to roost in the Lower East Side, the East Village, Soho, and the West Village before, turning what once were thriving artists communities into shopping malls where customers go to access haute couture of “flagship stores” rubbed up against the faded sparkle of what was once the firmament of something new– artistic creation. If an artist wears plaid, he wears plaid, if an artist lives in concrete factories divided up among other artists as a cheap way to live and paint, well then he must live in factories rehabbed by real estate developers into a “luxury lofts” and sold at a premium. If the artist wants to fall off the grid as a means of dissociating himself from the grotesque values of his nation by growing his own food and raising his own livestock. Well, Hefner Hipster must eat “locally” and at a “locavore” restaurant. (Why? Well, say the marketers, it is the most delicious way to eat!) And there is someone willing to sell it to him, to clothe him in Artist Hipster cloth for the shill and to hire Artist Hipsters to wait the tables, brew the coffee, and serve the martinis. So we get good looking R. Crumb and his “Maison Premiere”. We get an adroit un-nerdy, version of a brilliant subversive artist who was so disgusted by American consumer culture that he pulled up stakes and moved to France. Counter culture becomes behind the counter counter culture– where we the jobless generation serve the hereditarily wealthy, the baby boomers, and the urban professionals who mirror us. At Whole Foods or Trader Joes, we artist hipsters supplement the dead radical hippies on all the packages as real new live radicals with studs in our ears and punk bands selling yuppies nuts and balms as the corporate channel blares The Clash and other fuck you classics over the loudspeakers. It is not a coincidence. It is part of a marketing strategy. We, the image of the radical are your mediators to products, pleasures, and delights. We are also your confessors, selling you false absolution for your greedy habits by representing the radical forgiveness encoded into the products (“green”, “local”, “fair trade”, “post-consumer”, “recycled”, etc.). We are literally hired to sit with you in “locavore” Diner “Diner” underneath the Williamsburg bridge, look deep into your eyes, and tell you about delights and happy provenance of the items on the menu, drawing it all on disposable butcher paper. That is actually a thing that happens.

    We can also now see what the term “Hipster” actually means: a mirrored chamber used to deflect radical criticism away from capitalism and consumer culture. It is a more sophisticated, successful version of the transformation of the “Beat” into the “Beatnik”. Recall that Beatnik changed the Beat into everything their critics were themselves– shallow, comical, and focused on unimportant trifles. “Hipster” works the same way. The agglomeration of two opposites, the radical and the consumerist yuppie, into one acceptable slur simultaneously de-claws the radical by making him complicit in the system he is trying to destroy while allowing those who are actually complicit in that system (the working middle class) to freely hate the radical and whatever they don’t like about themselves. This is why we cannot blame poor Hefner Hipster. He is equally deceived. To middle class consumers the hipster is the obscene strange “other” middle class consumer– everything they dislike about their own behavior and self-image shed into a mythical “other person” which represents their own capitulated dissatisfaction with society and the shallow materialism from which none of us can escape even the most radical. He is a Juju man, or if one wants a more modern comparison and is ST:TNG fan, an Armus.

Part IV: The Hipster in Review

   To offer an example, why was my alma mater, Bard College, recently declared The Number One Most Hipster College? Was it because it caters to my demographic– white and (formerly) middle class? Obviously no. There are thousands more private schools and colleges for the white middle and upper classes which that do not produce “hipsters”. These places do not draw down the slur of “hipster” because they do not create liberal, intellectual, radicals, but rather more conformist, conservative, middle class citizens– that is to say, people who are more likely to propagate white middle class privilege. I am surrounded by the slur of “hipster” because I’ve put myself in places where I could study art, philosophy, history, and literature– the toolkit of the radical who wants to change society for the better, or at least, level criticism against it. The same subjects of course, are those capitalism considers to be economically impractical, the “art history” the President warns young undergraduates to eschew in “this” economy, implying they must adapt to the present, modern, circumstances. However if ever a millennial opened a copy of Hard Times, they would only need to tl;dr the first page to realize Obama’s advice about “this” economy is a century and a half old.

    As another example, we can look at New York Times articles such as “How Hipsters ruined Paris”. (Please just set aside the maddening fact that the “Bohemia” the author is looking for vanished a century ago.) To convince the reader of his title assertion, the author states, “People say you had to be in Paris in the ’20s or New York in the ’80s. The sad truth of our contemporary moment seems to be only that you no longer need to be anywhere in particular anymore. The brunch is the same.” The statement paints a strange picture– that of the author wandering the earth sampling disappointing brunches but somehow failing to ever blame himself for the problem. Passing over the obvious culprit (his own desire for high end-brunches), insanely, he considers someone called a “Hipster” responsible for “the same pleasant and invisible force that puts kale frittata, steel-cut oats and burrata salad on brunch tables from Stockholm to San Francisco.” There is indeed, a name for that “force”, and it is not “Hipster”. The author is an inch away from blaming the homogenous crass force of American capitalism for the woes of the neighborhood, like most French people do. But it is much easier for that author to use a term that is inherently confusing because to paraphrase George Orwell, imprecise language makes for imprecise thinking which makes for bad politics. If the author is a sloppy enough writer, who uses sloppy enough terms, he does not need to blame himself for the problem, though it is hilariously obvious to the reader. (viz. “The places I tour are ruined by tourists”). It is much easier for him to blame a personless “other” who exemplifies all the problems with our society. And stranger still, unless this mysterious miscreant is maybe somehow yourself, one of these poltergeists can never actually be found to be held accountable for his crimes.

   Similarly, two years ago The New York Times ran an article entitled, “Montauk feels the Effects of Too Many Hipsters”. The headline might have been more accurately rendered, “Local Working Class Beach Town Residents Despise Yuppies and Trust Fund Kids in Fashionable Clothing”. But this would of course signal to the reader that the story is not new, rather as old as the Renoir paintings depicting the first vacationing middle class “weekenders” wrought by the Industrial Revolution (Thanks Obama Art History!). The only thing new in the story is the term hipster which serves to deflect the blame away from what is obviously a class struggle towards a implied unique (though in reality fictional) fault in the character of our generation– decadent capitulation to consumerist materialism. This lies in stark contrast to the hard-scrabble full-blooded economized capitulation of the local working class residents. The locals, we learn, love to drink too, but the Hefner Hipsters leave trash behind, like young bratty Gatsbys littering West Egg with orange rinds.

   And we can study “How I Became a Hipster”, another Times story about a baby-boomer who travels to Brooklyn to discover what being a “hipster” means by going on a shopping spree. He delights in all “this generation of young folk” have to offer, that is to say the items we sell him: designer pizza, a fancy shave, alcohol, more alcohol, pants, lifestyle classes, and of course (as pictured) a bicycle. The immense ignorant tragedy of it all is not that the author treats our generation as servants purveying luxury goods to his generation. (That part is sad but at least true.)  It’s that he actually thinks the message our generation is sending him is that of some sort of volunteer holistic lifestyle butler– “grow rosemary and thyme in [your] kitchen”. This evil lie is the work of the term hipster, which wants to melt the radical spirit of our generation into the conformist consumer economy by confusing the people who consume with the people who are oppressed by consumerism.

   The name of the generation preceding mine (or depending on how you count it, my generation) does not have a spiteful pejorative slur associated with it. “Generation X”, accurate or not, was simply benignly dismissive, as if these young people, were a sort of mystery substance floating darkly in the shadow of the self-absorbed warp holes of the “Me Generation”. “What do they want?” the label seemed to say, “We can’t really say. Scientifically, we looked and the material of which they are made and objectively it is a mystery.” In the 90s, after the fall of the Berlin Wall, there seemed no alternative to the hegemonic worldview of modern capitalism. Generation X, of course, had similar values to all the counter-cultures that had come before it, a rejection of traditional middle class values, liberal or leftist ideas, a strong anti-consumerist bent. But neither Generation X or the society it challenged ever thought for one minute it would win out over mainstream society, or in fact, win anything at all. It was not a threat. The Generation X figurehead, Kurt Cobain, wrote songs attacking the same consumerist nonsense hipsters do today, then blew his brains out in despair floating atop a media empire he disdained. There was no way, it seemed, not to be complicit, to offer a real “alternative”. The only channel, it appeared, for Cobain was MTV, or whatever other corporation picked up what was trendy and sold it to children.

    Perhaps the most contemptible form of criticism of anti-corporate, anti-consumerist movement Occupy Wall Street was the idea that it was hypocritical of middle class white people to express solidarity with minorities who also want to challenge the status quo. Look for example at this National Review story, Study: OWS Was Disproportionately Rich, and Overwhelmingly White. The first sentence of the article informs us, “more than a third of activists in the Occupy movement in New York City had household incomes above $100,000”, that is to say, more accurately (if one reads the study), the reality is the exact opposite of what the headline contends– most people at OWS were not rich– two thirds of them had household incomes below 100,000. Furthermore we learn from the study (which concludes that the movement was genuine, diverse, and mainly young people in their 20s and early 30s), “Many OWS activists and supporters were under-employed and/or had recently experienced layoffs or job loss.” Why would the National Review reporter distort the evidence like this? The reason is the same reason the term hipster exists. The idea is to bloody the hands of the radical, to make him complicit in the crimes of the society he is trying to condemn. The virulence in the slur “hipster”, represents the fact that we are winning, or at least, unlike Generation X, a viable threat. We merit an attack.

    In his well-researched 2010 article in New York Magazine, Mark Grief starts off defining the hipster by getting it completely backwards:

The hipster is that person, overlapping with the intentional dropout or the unintentionally declassed individual—the neo-bohemian, the vegan or bicyclist or skatepunk, the would-be blue-collar or postracial twentysomething, the starving artist or graduate student—who in fact aligns himself both with rebel subculture and with the dominant class, and thus opens up a poisonous conduit between the two.

    We now see we need only invert this definition for it to make sense. Hipster is a slur which “aligns the rebel subculture” with “the dominant class” opening up a “poisonous conduit” by which he can be attacked. A crust-punk does not become a “hipster” when he buys a car to get to work or shops at Walmart knowing they don’t pay a fair wage, or like Cobain sells their video to MTV. Everyone, in some way, must “align themselves with the dominant class”. That is why, by definition, they are called “dominant”. it is not a valid critique of a radical viewpoint, it is only an attempt to invalidate it. Unlike most words, the term “hipster” is useful because it is unclear. Its function is to spread a vague indistinct miasma in which, under the intoxicating spell of contempt for a nameless “other”, class hatred and privilege is mingled with intellectualism and radicalism. The examples are endless, but what is, say, 22 Foods Hipsters Need to Calm Down About if not subsumed hatred misdirected at a specific group of people instead of the actual target– food marketers?

Part V: Animal Bands

    It’s now easy to decode much of  hipster imagery. The hipster’s oft-resented insincere irony is a defense mechanism against the way corporations usurp and then hollow out the counter culture’s ideals and imagery, as it has been since the 90s.[2] His Wes Anderson/Holden Caulfield preciousness is the means by which an entire generation can be infantilized through its romanticism. This explains to the hipster’s parents why he would want to live in a manner that is so radically different from their own screwed up existence, or as the self-obsessed baby-boomer parents understand it (in classic “Mature Mind” style), why he “refuses to grow up”[3]

   We can see Rousseau’s idealization of unspoiled wilderness, fantasy, the noble savage, and socialism in the animal band names ruled by the socialist “Animal Collective”.[4] Other band names also have socialists or anti-consumerists bents. “Nirvana” mocks the older baby boomer yoga mat notion of consumer transcendence. Beach House, who actively fought off corporate usurpation, evoke an ironic symbol of “jouissance” harkening back to MTV’s 90s televised “Beach Houses” of youthful decadence and abandon (themselves re-incarnations of the Playboy Mansion) and also the economic absurdity (so apparent to our generation) of owning two houses one of which is specifically dedicated to fun (whether in Montauk or France). Newer band name trends will probably move from Rousseau’s “noble savage” straight to wild landscapes and sword & sorcery fairy tales popularized by the romantics.[5] The images mean the same thing to us as they did to them– a wish to escape a deeply flawed society and create something entirely new from our imagination.

    When I read about Animal Collective in the early 2000s as a “Brooklyn-based Band” I wondered about the word “based”. It was always there– not “Brooklyn Band” or “Baltimore Band” but “Brooklyn-based” band. Why this imposition of “based”? What was this word doing in the sentence? Why not “Brooklyn band”? Well, because everyone knew they weren’t from Brooklyn. They (well, technically 2/3rds of them) were from the suburbs of Baltimore County. In fact, they went to school with me in the lush green sprawling suburbs only accessible by car that sits on top of the moldering scowling countenance of Baltimore City like a big fun hat. Our parents fled the urban environment and we remember it abandoned and forbidden and suffering in the 80s and 90s when “white flight” hit its zenith (or really, nadir). And so Baltimore County remains only accessible by car, with anemic bus lines and public transportation, in part, on purpose. Poor people who cannot afford cars cannot access it. My generation, chafing at this whole mode of living, wanted to leave it as soon as we were able. We wanted to move to places like Williamsburg where the landscape had not been totally transformed by the hegemony of cars– places with robust public transportation that were still condensed enough that we could walk or bike to our destination. “Brooklyn-based” was code for people of my generation to say they were ashamed of where they were from, a vaguely racist, materialistic, wasteful suburb. We wanted to define ourselves by a different sort of place, one which was cosmopolitan, diverse, and accessible, even though, being very young, we had just moved there from somewhere else.

    The bike, then is at the center of this idea, the anti-car, a rejection of a materialistic and consumerist lifestyle in which one must work consistently 9-5 for a salary to pay for all the items that each person must have to be a person in our society. It is hard to remember the opprobrium of owning just a bicycle had in the 80s or 90s– thankfully our generation has done away with a lot of it– but there is some vestige of it left in, for example, the film, The 40 Year Old Virgin. The eponymous hero only owns a bicycle, and in true Hefner style, cannot get laid because he cannot sweep women back to his bachelor pad and fuck them on so inadequate a vessel. Limply, he tells the girl who wishes to go home with him, “I hope you have a big trunk… because I’m putting my bike in it.”, effeminizing himself by suggesting his effete possessions would be carried by her traditional symbol of masculinity, the car.

    The bike also represents the modest, hard-scrabble, determination of our generation, who is disenfranchised, who will never part the power, influence, and wealth from the generation that preceded them, but insists on living in a way that they deem ethical. Occupy Wall Street was very much about how our generation sees a way forward, a better way of living than the grim, minable, parsimonious future envisioned for us by corporations and the status quo. This is nothing new. Ever since modern society has been created, romantics, artists, and radicals have been insisting on a polity which embraces a broader social responsibility and a more robust and expansive view of human purpose– even if we are powerless to prevent the drab march of its opposite and often feel as though some of the dynamics are so entrenched they are impossible to escape– Where do we place our money if not banks? How do we sell our art if not by marketing it? But just because we are outnumbered and do not and probably will not ever hold the power to uproot the system and build a more ethical one in it’s place, and so must live inside the taint of it, does not mean you will not see us, on the side of the road, in a gutter generally reserved for waste, in neighborhoods the boomers feared to tread, huffing away on a modest instrument of transportation which we build and repair ourselves, trying our best to live a way that is true to our values.

[1] I refer to myself as “hipster” because I fall in the target area the term draws. Also, obviously the best way to disarm a pejorative slur for a class of people is for that class to to adopt and co-opt the slur for themselves.

[2] A particularly uncritical essay on hipsters cites irony as their signature feature, ignoring almost every other use of the term.

[3] “They have not yet tempered their ideal­istic visions of what awaits. ‘The dreary, dead-end jobs, the bitter divorces, the disappointing and disrespectful children … none of them imagine that this is what the future holds for them,’” Quo Vadis?

[4] Borrowing the short list, “Grizzly Bear, Neon Indian, Deerhunter, Fleet Foxes, Department of Eagles, Wolf Parade, Band of Horses, and, most centrally, Animal Collective.”

[5] Gleaned from Seventeen Magazine : Hundred Waters, Local Natives, Wild Cub, Warpaint, Holy Ghost!, Tanlines, Wildcat! Wildcat! Ahahaha, there is now a band called, “Animals as Leaders

27 Apr 16:09

Good Muslim/Bad Muslim

by lenin
As an attempt to resist negative stereotyping, this has to be deemed a failure.



I can see why it might appeal. I like the song, and I enjoy the view of people arsing about to an infectiously cheerful tune as much as anyone. And if this weren't an attempted intervention on the terrain of cultural politics, it would be sweetly enjoyable. However, it's a problem, or rather it's illustrative of a problem, a wider strategic dilemma. Because this looks like an attempt to undermine 'scary' representations of Islam by showing a happy, smiling, dancing face. It's sweet, but it's also pandering. It is also indicative of a wider approach that I think is divisive and plays into the well-known 'good' Muslim/'bad' Muslim dichotomy. How?

 Well, just take some examples from recent news headlines. We learned: That there has been a sharp increase in the Muslim population in prisons over the last decade, with Muslims now making up 27% of all prisoners in London. That Moazzam Begg has been locked up again. And that the government is spreading Daily Express-style rumours of an 'Islamic schools plot' and has put 'counter-terrorism' apparatuses behind an investigation into the allegations. One could go on, but the point is there are quite a large number of Muslims who have no particular reason to smile and dance - whether because they're poor, or because they are politicised, or because they have been criminalised. For one reason or another, they've been brought under the grid of state surveillance and sanction for reasons which bear directly on their being Muslim.

 Now, if the problem of Islamophobia is construed as being purely or primarily a public relations battle, and if stereotyping is understood as the main form of racist oppression faced by Muslims, then of course this strategy is comprehensible. Combat the negative images, demonstrate how much we heart things that other people heart, how normal we are, and people will stop hating us, discrimination will wind down, tabloid frenzies will stop working, aggressive policing will abate, and politicians will lose their power to divide and control us. If the main problem was public opinion, all this would make sense. However, I think that's a perspective that can only really make sense for a segment of relatively middle class or bourgeois Muslims (who seem, on appearance, to make up the majority of those featured in the video). If you are among those who are surveilled in universities and estates, or stopped by police, or dragged into Paddington Green, or 'rendered', then it's hard to see public opinion as anything but a subsidiary element of a struggle for political empowerment.

 It seems almost pedantic to say so, but I think that a) public opinion is not the main problem, and b) insofar as opinion means ideology, and I take the terrain of ideology very seriously, it can't be engaged in on a short-term public relations basis. I think you win ideological battles by changing the underlying coordinates within which popular judgments about issues are formed, which is a long-term strategy that requires taking and holding unpopular positions until they become popular - in other words being disagreeable, not happy, not amenable, making a fuss, and so on. Not only that, but there are clearly issues which cannot be addressed in any but a contentious manner. As such, ingratiating oneself on the basis that one isn't like 'them', the 'bad' Muslims, is surely a divisive strategy that not only does not serve the interests of those most likely to be villainised as 'bad' Muslims, but is also limiting for those who might expect to benefit from being classed as 'good' Muslims, who might themselves have to be disagreeable from time to time.
24 Apr 00:52

emmiebar5: i’m sorry, but this tweet is the best



emmiebar5:

i’m sorry, but this tweet is the best

22 Apr 01:32

Fuck “Innovation” 2: Time is a Line, You Guys!

by Amy Hoy

I’m writing this on Friday at 8pm. Slightly soused, if you must know.

Just a scant 2 hours ago, Alex and I wrapped up our infamous 30×500 Bootcamp, 7 (really 8) hours a day, two days in a row. Yes, the lessons are pre-recorded, but the homework critique, the guidance, the Q&A? Totally live.

Then Alex and I walked to the restaurant where we’re hosting our speaker’s dinner to talk details.

Then I drank 2 mojitos.

This normally wouldn’t touch me, but I’m wrung out and tired, and the bartenders are friendly and I still haven’t recovered from my mojito deficit incurred by 4 years in that infamously mojito-free zone, Austria.

So believe me when I say: I am sick and tired of fucking missing and shitty tools, ok?

THIS IS WHY I’M PISSED

Yesterday, 30×500 ran like an engine with a timing belt. We were bang on time. The evening Q&A ran a little late, but it’s always a bit of a wildcard anyway.

Today, we blew our schedule first thing.

Somehow we managed to end, again, on-time-ish.

Up til that point though, when we said our final farewells and high-fived, Alex and I kept having to juggle our attentive student-wrangling duties with constant math.

Clock math, which is the worst kind.

Here’s what happened today, & every day, everywhere

This morning Q&A ran 15 minutes over time. Oops. Alex suggested we skip homework review to make up time but I vetoed. Homework review is sacred.

So then we were 25 minutes overtime. Before lunch!

When would we break for lunch?

Would we have to kill one of the coffee & pee breaks?

Is there something we could shorten?

How was this going to work??

To find out, we had to take calculator breaks.

Not even fucking kidding.

Why??

Because product designers are lazy dickheads!

In case there are any event management tool product designers in the audience, I am going to speak slowly and extra clearly:

THIS IS MAXWELL’S DEMON FOR EVENT ORGANIZATION: Time passes, shit gets later. And later. This means:

Shit runs late.

Shit then has to reflow.

Shit then may, or may not, have to be sacrificed.

It’s motherfucking entropy!

Now, you may be all:

But product designers seem to have never run or attended an event in their lives, so please feel free to beat them about the head and neck with any trout or other fish you may have about your person.

Maybe then we’ll get software that handles over-runs for us sometime before the heat death of the universe.

Until then…

Muddle-fucking-through!

That’s what we have to do til we all die in a pit of fire or ice. Because of the sheer and unadulterated — nay, joyful! — incompetence of product “designers”, all us conf & event organizers run our events on, basically, stone fucking tablets.

Alex and I use Hackpad (Hacktablet?), so we can “check off” each section as we go (because, NB, no scheduling tool hides shit you already did). But of course any clock times in the schedule are just plain goddamned text, typed and calculated entirely by hand and subject to error.

So, the headline may be: LUNCH 12:15PM but that can be wrong. Was wrong. Alex tweaked times and moved things. And until we actually closed out the last fixed length thing, we couldn’t know.

This is not some fucking special snowflake case. Last time we ran BaconBizConf, we accidentally “gained” an hour in our schedule just this fucking way. In the midst of everything else organizers have to do, we made a simple mathematical error.

We discovered this late. Very fucking late.

I feel like I need to apologize again to the lightning speakers we had to bump.

No, Apple/Google/Yahoo!/Path Calendar will not do the job.

Smartass. Why? This is why:

Pasted Image 4 18 14 8 51 PM

There is not a single damn thing about using a calendar app that helps you do this job better, just more goddamn busywork.

What really gets me is this stuff is obvious to anyone with a pair of eyes, and for fuck’s sake, simple to fix!

For fuck’s sake, this is 2014!

We’re in the TWENTY FIRST CENTURY! Doing clock math, by hand, for an activity the human race does thousands of times a day across the world and online specifically!

Why!?!

This right here is a big reason why:

@copyhackers @amyhoy well that, and, the total market size of "people who have money and organize conferences" numbers in the 100s globally

— trcull (@trcull) April 18, 2014

No offense to this dude but until I pointed out otherwise, he thought there would be like 100 customers in the entire world for this. Maybe 200. But definitely less than *1000.*

Well, actually…

Event planning and management is a huge fucking industry and it grows bigger moment by moment like some cyclopean creeping horror.

There are DEGREES for it.

Have you ever heard of convention centers? What do you think they build them for, anarchist parties that have no fascist start and end times?!

Tech confs alone are big business, but every industry has events! You think tech confs are big? Specialty medical conferences can have 40,000 attendees!

RubyConf once shared an event hotel with a tanning bed sales conference! It was exactly as weird and orange as you’d expect!

You want to sell tickets? Great, you’ve got 5000 options. You want to actually, you know, run the event you sold all those tickets for? GTFO.

Promise of the future my ass!

The other reason this is really idiotic is that computers are really good at math and ordering things, and humans suck at it.

Which is why it’s extra special stupid to foist computer-work on people, and people work (“promote your event!!”) on computers.

Event planning software designers: Smart move, you guys.

I don’t ask for much. I really, really don’t.

If there’s a glass slipper out there that does what I’m demanding the universe deliver, I sure as hell can’t find it.

Don’t believe me? Go ahead, Google:

I googled a lot more than this but, believe me, the barren results you see from the above only get worse.

Again: Not a special fucking snowflake.

Every event needs the tool I am describing.

Any you attend, you’ll find an organizer standing in the corner, nervously checking her watch against a piece of paper printed in Draft Mode because, of course, she’ll be reprinting it later. When shit runs late.

Because it always runs late.

And yet the only calendaring tools that exist just keep on keepin’ on, showing you the entire day in the same colors even though things are definitely in the past, cackling while it forces you to act like a glorified Skinnerian pigeon clicking and dragging and clicking and dragging and clicking and dragging just to do the fucking work that rightly belongs to the fucking circuits that add and subtract.

Sometimes I just can’t believe it.

Am I the only designer paying attention?

Because sometimes it feels like it. Don’t think this is self-aggrandizement; in fact, I don’t think I’m in any way a hot shit designer. But I think about things.

Which is why, up til the point that I screamed in frustration and drew a series of stacked parallel lines on a piece of paper, all time zone tools looked like this:

Time Zone Converter Time Difference Calculator

And then this:

The World Clock Time Zone Converter U S A New York New City vs United Kingdom England London

And since I literally became so apopletic I cried, “Fuck this!”, ripped a piece of paper from the printer and practically assaulted my husband with my furious, slapdash doodle of stacked time lines with city names, and he very gamely implemented and polished it, and we launched it — Every Time Zone — time zone tools start to look like this:

Time Zones and MarsEdit

Now people are copying us and acting like duh, obvious, time is a line bro, of course.

And people praise us every day and we get thousands of hits.

For a fucking time zone tool, guys. A TIME ZONE TOOL. After medical records management, the most boring thing you could ever do.

All because I bothered to take 5 minutes and think: Why does this suck so much, and how could it not suck?

In closing:

Time is a line.

Time is a fucking line, guys. It marches inexorably towards the future. And yet, it is different times simultaneously in other places.

And: Events run late. Always.

And yet the most basic of tools for these most basic principles of the universe either suck horrendously, or don’t exist at all.

Time is a line. It’s a motherfucking line. Please for fuck’s sake don’t make me draw it by hand. Please stop forcing me to break out the software equivalent of rounded kindergarten scissors and Elmer’s Glue to do something the fucking computer should do for me.

Fuck innovation. No, seriously, fuck it.

And please, pretty please will somebody, for the love of god, make me a dead simple event scheduling tool so I don’t have to design and develop it myself.

Please?

Drunken call to action

“You forgot a CTA,” my husband texted me from the bath tub where he read this and laughed and laughed* (* with me, I think).

So:

If you can’t make me a goddamned scheduling tool, at least fucking sign up for my free 7-part email course on how to make fucking products that people fucking want.

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22 Apr 01:28

Mojito Island & Entreporn, Revisited

by Amy Hoy

This article is about Entreporn and Mojito Island, and the emotionally manipulative fantasy narratives of “success.” Entreporn is a word I coined, on this podcast. Mojito Island is another term of art that you might want to know, coined by DHH himself.

Without further ado…

If you ever wanted to understand the startup media through pictures of pretty furniture, this post is for you.

Look at this gorgeous fucking room:

It’s not my style at all. Is it your style? It really doesn’t matter, does it — it’s gorgeous. Even if you wouldn’t want to live in it, it pleases the eye. (And if you would love to live in it… it probably makes your heart swell a little bit, at the thought of having it.)

Now imagine it’s not a photograph, but words:

Luminous gold tone wallpaper, with white, grey and teal flower motifs scattered about; framed in glossy white wood paneling; tall white windows, with full-length white curtains spilling to the classic honey herringbone parquet floor; a long, piano black dining table with turned legs, stately but modern brass lamps that harmonize but don’t go so far as to match each other, mirrors, tasteful low bookcases with fascinating objects, a collection of jadeite jugs with fresh flowers, a soft white highboy anchoring the room with much-needed height, an overstuffed and very casual blue velvet chair; sleek, matte Panton dining chairs, a textural and sculptural contrast to the matching holstein cowhides they rest on. The cherry on the sundae is the gorgeous brass and crystal swag chandelier, which takes what could be a cavernous ceiling height and instead makes it feel luxurious.

A welcoming, easy elegance… a mixture of high, low, and in between, neoclassical and modern, no pretensions.

Oh, I could write pages.

But…

Given my (detailed, and spirited) description, words only, could you buy the things you needed and design and arrange a room that looked anything like the photograph?

If you’re starting to nod your head “Yes”… buddy, I got news for you: You’re lying to yourself. It seems easy because you’ve seen the photograph. But there’s no way. I couldn’t, and I even lived in an apartment with bones just like that one, and I know what herringbone parquet, jadeite, and Vernor Panton chairs are!

Now imagine it’s not about a room, but an entrepreneur:

Working on your deck at midnight; supercharged meetings with your co-founder. Important work dates at your local coffee shop, heads together, collaborating on the future. Days of excitement, of thrills, and of course, of drama… but drama from which you emerge, triumphant. Large bank wires to your account. People believe in you, to the tune of 6 zeros… or more. The press likes you (or maybe the press hates you… but you’ll show them!). A day when you feel down in the dumps, filled with doubt, is it all a fantasy? Can you ever do it? But the new day dawns and you crawl, bleary eyed, out of bed, because you know what you’re doing is important. Or at least profitable. And after a year, or two, or three — on the outside — you hit the climax. All those long hours, the fancy delivery Szechuan (not any ordinary Chinese), the Blue Bottle coffee, the artful whiteboarding, the stress, the hiring, the natural way you assume leadership of your team — the threads finally come together into a big fucking bow of a denouement:

You receive the offer.

You’ve read the description. Can you paint the reality?

No. It seems like you could, but you can’t. You can’t do it for honey parquet floors and a piano black dining table with turned legs, you definitely can’t do it for the life of a startup.

The story isn’t actually a story — it’s a pastiche. And the thing about pastiches is two-fold:

  • They’re vague, even when they seem detailed.
  • They’re designed to seduce, and to discourage questions.

They’re the deceptive Karate Kid montage all over again: Wax on, wax off.

When you saw that montage the first time, some part of you was going “YEAH!” Because part of you thought, Yep, that’s how it’s done! (As if you knew.) And you were also thinking, I could do that. (And some part of you believed it.)

That’s entreporn, in a nutshell.

Entreporn is designed to seduce

It’s not real. It’s tantalizing. It’s got all the messy real-life stuff edited out — even though it seems detailed and realistic, hey, there’s drama in my montage! Wax on, wax off. It’s fake, safe drama, where the conclusion is pre-determined. There was no real risk, just enough of an illusion of risk to make it exciting.

Entreporn, like real porn, feeds on your emotions. (Yes, emotions.) It makes you feel like you were there. That you were a part of it — or you could be. You know what it takes. You could do it.

And that feeling is the most seductive in the world. Even when you know, rationally, it’s porn, you can’t help but be drawn in.

That’s the startup media’s raison d’etre.

(Conspiracy? Not at all. But sex sells. Lots of other things sell, too, but selling sex is easy even if you’re talentless.)

Before our mojitos, let’s take a break.

Let’s step away, for a moment, from the pornographic cesspit that is startup media and cleanse our mental palates with this gorgeous, luminous, refreshing room:

It, too, is seductive… but unlike the Startup Founder Montage, it’s real. Right? You can imagine yourself living in this room — or one just like it, but to your taste — and how relaxing, and refreshing it would be. The friends you would entertain. How peaceful you would feel.

Well, yes. And no.

The End… or is it?

In the Startup Founder Montage I wrote, the ‘story’ ended with “The Offer.”

But does it really? What is so transformative and powerful about receiving (or even accepting) a buyout offer? What movie ends on the passing of a check, the winning of a lottery, or the quitting of a job? None, that I know of.

If you’re a scriptwriter, the money has to be given significance. The acquisition has to have a reason. The liquidity event is near the end of the movie, there will still be an afterlude… a spooling out of cause and effect.

So, what comes after The Offer?

Mojito Island. Private jets. Fancy hotel rooms. Globe trotting. Life on Easy Street. Getting the girl — only in this case, it might be a real girl, or a girl-stand-in, like proving to everyone (especially yourself) that you are not, in fact, the worthless impostor you feel yourself to be.

There’s just one problem…

Mojito Island is not a real place. It’s not even a real idea.

Once, over tapas with my biz partner Alex, I paused to take out my iPhone and bid on a matched pair of (replica) Jacobsen Egg Chairs. Alex, jokingly, called me a “Crazy Chair Lady.” It’s true… I enjoy a surfeit of seating. I know my chairs.

And let me tell you:

This room doesn’t work. It’s a dining room, but it’ll be an incredibly awkward if not impossible place to dine. Here’s why:

  • those Panton chairs are actually quite comfy to sit in, but…
  • they’re nearly impossible to scoot backwards to get in and out, because of their base
  • not only are they hard to scoot, but if you do manage to scoot instead of tip backwards, you’ll run into the rugs placed behind them!
  • the rugs will bunch up, or you’ll get caught and trip backwards
  • there’s no elbow room; the chairs are jammed together
  • there’s no leg room at either head or foot of the table, either, because of the chair’s shape & size

That’s Mojito Island for you, the pinnacle of entreporn, the idea that, after the denouement, after the credits roll, you will sit on a beach with ice cold minty booze, forever.

It looks better than it works. Guaranteed.

Forever is a long time, and unless you’re the world’s worst at what you do, you do it on some level out of love, enjoyment, or purpose.

Why would you enter a field for enjoyment, build something you care about, and then… discard it? Just for money? For the fantasy of a life-long vacation?

There’s a reason that mortality rates increase dramatically for retirees compared to folks who keep working.

So, you’ll get bored. Then what? You’ll have to start again, from scratch. And what if you can’t make as big a success as you did the last time? What then? You’ll have given away your best work, for what? A life-changing payday?

Have you heard of taxes? The payday math on startup acquisitions isn’t that great.

But don’t kid yourself — you won’t be on Mojito Island in the first place, because acquisitions don’t happen without employment contracts. Two to four years working in the employee saltmine before you can get on with your Mojito Island disillusionment tour.

And by that point, from my many second-hand observations, you’ll be crushed, inside and out. Most bigco’s that acquire little startups do so in order to destroy them (on purpose or otherwise).

And let’s not forget there was a reason you chose to not be an employee to begin with.

That’s why fantasy stories are always vague

And why startup stories especially are long on ra-ra-ra!! independence, make your own way, be your own boss, change the world… and yet remain silent on what happens afterwards.

It’s the same reason why still photographs can’t convey the reality of living & working in a “beautiful” room. Why there are never toothpaste tubes or kids’ toys or litter boxes in fancy home tours, much less mess and clutter.

Why nobody shits in the movies. Or gets divorced 10 years after the triumphal orchestral swell.

They’re lies. They’re deception. They’re airbrushed, abridged, amended. They’re porn.

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17 Apr 01:06

Photo



17 Apr 00:26

‘Having the goodwill of all the people’

by Fred Clark

As the community that would eventually become the “church” began in the book of Acts, Luke says, “And day by day the Lord added to their number those who were being saved.”

That description doesn’t seem to apply to white evangelicalism these days. That’s not surprising if you read the rest of that chapter in Acts, and everything leading up to that consequence of “the Lord added to their number”:

All who believed were together and had all things in common; they would sell their possessions and goods and distribute the proceeds to all, as any had need. Day by day, as they spent much time together in the temple, they broke bread at home and ate their food with glad and generous hearts, praising God and having the goodwill of all the people. And day by day the Lord added to their number those who were being saved.

The early church grew because they sought and won “the goodwill of all the people.”

Or, if you’re Southern Baptist Junior Spokesman Daniel Darling, the early church grew because it preached a “false gospel of nice.” Squishy liberals just wanna be liked, Darling says.

Darling — like his SBC mentors — aims to be a contentious prick. For Jesus. He seems to think that devotion to “orthodoxy” requires that we be abrasive, belligerent and deliberately unlovely. Darling quotes the words of Jesus, “If the world hates you, be aware that it hated me before it hated you.”

That’s scripture! That’s from John 15:18. Here’s the verse before that: “I am giving you these commands so that you may love one another.” (Oh Noes!1! Even Jesus is a squishy liberal preaching a false gospel of nice!)

Frederick Douglass’ problem, according to Daniel Darling, is that he was too “nice.”

Folks like Darling see a conflict between “the world hates you” and “having the goodwill of all the people.” A Southern Baptist is bound to find that confusing because Southern Baptist theology was invented to be otherworldly — to accommodate and to bless injustice in this world. It is what Christianity looks like when Christians are trying to both: 1) Read and follow their Bibles, and 2) Own, buy, sell, steal from, beat, rape, scourge, torture and proselytize other human beings.

This is why Southern Baptist theology — the intrinsically white theology of American evangelicalism — will always be conflicted and always be confused when it attempts to engage the book of Acts or passages like John 15. This is why this white theology will never allow itself to understand what Jesus was talking about as “the world.”

Darling seems to think that “the world” in John 15 refers to the same thing as “all the people” in Acts 2. He thinks “the world” means the hoi polloi, the riff-raff, the public, the rabble, the unwashed and the unsaved and the unclean. As if those were the people in charge of this world. As if those were the people who run this world. That’s why if you want to understand what Jesus is talking about there in John 15, you’re much better off turning to Sister Sinead than to any member of the Southern Baptist hierarchy.

Poor Daniel Darling dimly grasps, as Steven Sondheim said, that “nice is different than good.” So far, so good. But he then takes a wrong turn by concluding that means that being un-nice is all that one needs to do to be good. To be good, then, means not seeking “the goodwill of all the people.” It means, rather, disdaining that goodwill.

And, actually, “good” isn’t even in the picture. Darling isn’t interested in “good,” only in “orthodox” — an orthodox white theology which is even more different from good than nice is.

Yeah, I know that 1845 was 169 years ago, and that Southern Baptists are probably tired of me talking about slavery. Tough. The fact is that you cannot understand the theology of white Southern Baptists today, in 2014, without understanding how that theology was shaped by and for slavery. That’s the whole of it. Take away the centuries spent concocting a theological defense of slavery and you could never, ever arrive at anything like today’s white Southern Baptist theology. You can’t get here without starting there.

Just look at Darling’s contempt for social justice. Look at the way he frames his argument as requiring a choice between either fidelity to the Bible or social justice.

Please go and read a Bible. Read the whole thing. Read the law, and the prophets, and the Psalms and Proverbs, the chronicles of kings, the Gospels, the Acts and the epistles and the apocalypse. Now consider what it requires to be able to read all of that and still be blind to how social justice is woven into every part of that story of redemption, from Genesis to Revelation. Consider the vast scope of the mechanism involved that would allow one to read that and somehow to see it as something separate from and opposed to social justice.

That astonishing achievement is only possible thanks to centuries of hard work reinterpreting, selectively disregarding and dismissing everything the Bible says about this world. It is the culmination of generations of rationalization in defense of the indefensible. It required an entirely new hermeneutic, and so a new hermeneutic was developed, a white hermeneutic in support of white theology. It required a redefinition of scores of biblical themes — salvation, redemption, love, justice, mercy, virtue — and so, over the years, these things were all redefined and their earlier meanings were rejected and forgotten.

American slavery may have ended more than a century ago, but the theology that evolved to defend it still thrives and flourishes. No one will ever accuse that white theology of being “nice.” But no one will ever mistake it for being good either.

 

17 Apr 00:20

Microsoft Pursuing Original Content for Xbox

by Ben Thompson
Zephyr Dear

oh good, finally someone is producing content for males aged 18-34.

Another follow-up to my piece on TV, this time having to do with Microsoft. From Bloomberg:

Microsoft Corp. is going Hollywood with a cast including comedians Sarah Silverman and Seth Green, aspiring World Cup players and eerily human robots.

All are involved in shows that Microsoft’s new Xbox television studio plans to roll out globally starting in June. Helmed by former CBS Corp. honcho Nancy Tellem, who Microsoft hired 19 months ago to build a TV powerhouse from the ground up, the studio now has six series lined up — including a science-fiction thriller called “Humans” about humanoid robot workers — and more than a dozen projects in development.

Currently, there is no reason for someone interested in a TV add-on to purchase an Xbox; it’s simply too expensive relative to the competition. However, were Microsoft to have a hit show, then that could become a reason-to-buy. At least, I’m guessing that’s the justification, and no, I don’t think it will work. That price point is simply too high a barrier.

Then again, perhaps Microsoft has gotten the memo. From later in the article:

Unlike the critically-lauded titles Netflix chooses by number-crunching its subscribers’ favorite actors and genres, Tellem said Microsoft’s marching orders are to focus on its gamer audience, typically males between 18 to 34 years old.

This effort does make more sense as an attempt to differentiate from the PS4, which is fine as far as it goes. It’s far, far removed, though, from the Xbox’s original mission of owning all living rooms.

The post Microsoft Pursuing Original Content for Xbox appeared first on stratechery by Ben Thompson.

17 Apr 00:05

sootonthecarpet: what if instead of a same gender detective partnership who keep getting mistaken...

sootonthecarpet:

what if instead of a same gender detective partnership who keep getting mistaken for a romantic couple, you had a same gender romantic couple who keep getting mistaken for detectives
‘hello, I’m sam darling, and this is my partner gregory hitch’ ‘AH YES THE PRIVATE DETECTIVES’ ‘what??? no we just came for some ice cream why is there police tape everywhere’

16 Apr 01:19

Eat pork or die.

by lenin
The French fascists are buoyant.  Brimming with energy after recent electoral success, the leader of the Front national (FN) Marine Le Pen has come up with a new way of punishing the Mohammedan interlopers.  Their children should be made to eat pork or starve.  And in towns that the FN have taken control of, this will be policy.

There are three points of immediate interest here.  

First, the invocation of 'secularism'.  Of all the the possible forms of ascriptive humiliation that could be targeted against Muslims, Le Pen chose one that is based on the French ideology of laïcité.  This is a typical example of how the far right cannily exploits contradictions in the dominant ideology, imbricating itself into the 'mainstream' by operating on racist canards already popularised by the state, the ascendant parties, and the mass media.  After all, why make allowances for replacement meals if we're banning headscarves?  Of course, the fact that it also by definition targets Jewish pupils is a bonus for an organisation that, while trying to efface the most egregious manifestations of antisemitic ideology from its public image, likes to keep the hardcore happy.  

Le Pen's provocation poses a challenge to the bourgeois parties.  Either they accede, and grant her point as a logic extension of their own avowed commitments, or they rationalise, prevaricate and obfuscate.  Neither option is good for them; both are great for the FN.  The only possible way out would be to break with the ideology of laïcité and republicanism, which isn't going to happen.

Second, the palpable punitive violence of the suggestion.  This is, of course, veiled in layers of plausible deniability, and mantled in the civilising discourse of the state.  It isn't as though a bunch of school bullies or a gang of fascists was randomly targeting Muslim kids and trying to force-feed them chunks of bacon.  It is instead a form of racialised biopolitics, which amounts to the state taking hold of the bodies of Muslim and Jewish children, and compelling them on pain of going hungry to ingest something which is - if they are devout - proscribed for them.  

It is one thing to regulate apparel, to tell Muslims how they might dress in school, or work.  But to regulate their diet, to compel them to ingest and assimilate into their body, on pain of not eating, something that is haraam, that is considered the filthiest meat, from what is considered the dirtiest animal in existence; and then to routinise it, as a matter of bureaucratic course, to regularly mark out as excluded those who cannot eat the meal or as capitulating those who do; this is a remarkably efficient way to make a symbolic act of humiliation both recurrent and ongoing, and effective at a deep, somatic level.  

Third, this is social sadism, but it is sadism predicated upon resentment.  The cause of resentment in this case is deviance from the dominant culture.  It is the idea that Muslims (and Jews), by being different and getting away with it, are getting something special.  It is the idea that this is just one of the many little extras and allowances given to the foreigner, the immigrant, the Muslim by the treacherous cosmopolitan elites in flagrant disregard for France's traditional secularism.  

This is not to say that difference as such is the cause of resentment.  Certainly, Muslim dietary habits might offend the parochial universalism that is integral to imperialist culture, but the question then is why don't all such deviations cause social resentment.  There is nothing particularly controversial about the 'veggie option', for example; it would be more controversial if it wasn't there.  Even airlines supply a range of meals for people with different dietary requirements: you can have Kosher, Muslim, Hindu, Jain, Vegan vegetarian, Lacto ovo vegetarian, Asian vegetarian, seafood only, bland, diabetic, gluten intolerant, low fat, low salt, low lactose, and so on and so on.  People are different; they have different needs: hardly news.  Most such differences don't generate social resentment.  They have to be connotatively linked to suffering and loss for that to happen.  

And of course, there has been for some time a project on the Right to popularise the notion that white people are being cheated and oppressed.  Whether it is UKIP's Farage claiming to speak for the 'white working class', or the UMP's Jean-François Copé bemoaning 'anti-white racism', there has been a persistent project of linking the experiences of material decline on the part of certain social classes and strata with the spectre of national decline.  Nor is this practice restricted to the Right.  The fantasy of Majorité Opprimée was that the free rein given to North African immigrants, and particularly Muslims, menaced the material well-being, comfort and freedom of the French middle class, by undermining the 'values' upon which France was based - and that a particular form of nationalist feminism could save both France and its embattled middle class.  

The cumulative effect of this is that significant layers of the population link their grievance, their injury and their loss to the freedoms and allowances made for Muslims, and want evidently something more than a simple material restitution whatever that could consist of: they want punishment, denigration and humiliation.  They want their accumulated rage to be efficacious, for once; to be channelled in a terrible, cruel revenge.  They want 'payback'.  And to those, the FN offers a tantalising foretaste of what real 'payback' might feel like.
16 Apr 01:08

My book of cartoons ‘You’re All Just Jealous of my Jetpack’ is...



My book of cartoons ‘You’re All Just Jealous of my Jetpack’ is available now:
US: http://www.amazon.com/dp/1770461043
UK: http://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1770461043
Other stockists and info at www.tomgauld.com

16 Apr 00:50

you really only need to watch the first 10 seconds



you really only need to watch the first 10 seconds

16 Apr 00:18

The Tattooed Academic

by philphord

I’ve been in the United States now for 26 years, going on 27. That span of time has seen a lot of changes, large and small. A large one: a wholesale revision of mainstream American attitudes towards LGBTQ civil rights. A small one: when I got here the only beer you could buy was the style I think of as “lawnmower lager.” On a hot day after vigorous yard work, served as near as possible to frozen, it tastes great. Under most other circumstances, it disappoints. And that was the only beer you could get, unless you bought an import. And then Pete’s Wicked Ale appeared, and that seemed to kick off a domestic craft brewing revolution that means you can now find esoterica like Belgian framboise lambic pretty much anywhere. And the same kind of change has been enacted more generally in American cuisine, to the point now that we’ve started rediscovering the humble virtues of the food and drink we’ve spent the last couple of decades running away from. Pabst Blue Ribbon has gone from being what your Dad drinks to being an arch joke to being what you drink ironically to being what you drink with a veneration for American vernacular food culture.

And speaking of Frank Booth, how about tattoos. When I came to the U.S. in 1987, tattoos were associated — in my mind, at least, and in the minds of nervous bougies like me — as belonging to the kind of scary lowlife who populate that iconic moment of Blue Velvet. I didn’t know anyone who had a tattoo, or at least anyone who showed it off, until around 1990 or so, when I was slightly shocked (but also curious and sort of psyched) to see a cellist I worked with roll up his sleeve and show off a simple, unstylized outline of a Hill cello he had tattooed on his right bicep. This was a surprise — not only that someone I had filed in one category (non-tattoo) was actually in the other, but that he was sporting a tattoo that wasn’t about being badass or threatening. It didn’t have skulls and flames and snakes and what-all; it was a monument only to my friend’s enthusiasm for Hill cellos.

In retrospect, this innocently geeky tatt was a sign of things to come. One small but telling thing that has changed completely in the last quarter-century has been the mainstreaming of tattoos. I think I first really noticed this when I moved to Austin about a decade ago. When I would take my kids to the Barton Springs Pool, I would see other young parents piling out of minivans and poking Cheerios into the mouths of fretful babies and doing normal parental things, but sleeved up and sometimes with just about every visible square inch of skin below the neck covered in tatts. And it started to occur to me then that the social meaning of tattoos had changed. There were still lots of situations where you would get the stinkeye for having one – obviously, since there still are now — and to be sure a lot of the tattoos appearing incongruously on the bodies of these solidly domesticated and vaguely middle-aged Austinites were still of the skulls-snakes-flames variety, but still, something had changed. With the new phenomenon of the cool geek came the phenomenon of the geek tattoo. And that’s where we are now.

But in the early 1990s, tattoos were generally assumed to be the domain of bikers, barflies, vets, and rockers, and this assumption informs David Foster Wallace’s Infinite Jest. Much of Infinite Jest takes place in a drug recovery center, where addicts from various backgrounds deal with the fallout from the bad choices they made during their years enslaved by various Substances. And in one passage, Wallace makes the tattoo a metonym for all those bad, act-in-haste-repent-in-leisure choices:

Because the whole thing about tattoos is that they’re permanent, of course, irrevocable once gotten–which of course the irrevocability of a tattoo is what jacks up the adrenaline of the intoxicated decision to sit down in the chair and actually get it (the tattoo)–but the chilling thing about the intoxication is that it seems to make you consider only the adrenaline of the moment itself, not the irrevocability that produces the adrenaline. It’s like the intoxication keeps your tattoo-type person from being able to project his imagination past the adrenaline of the impulse and even consider the permanent consequences that are producing the buzz of excitement.

Now, this passage is told from the perspective of Tiny Ewell, an alcoholic lawyer who is himself untattooed but becomes obsessed with the tattoos of his fellow recovery center residents. So the assumption here that “your tattoo-type person” is by nature impulsive and self-destructive is perhaps only Ewell’s, but I suspect it also pretty much reflects Wallace’s own point of view. It was, after all, pretty much the usual opinion of intellectual middle-class types in the mid 1990s.

Not that Wallace doesn’t have a point. The whole thing with tattoos is that they’re permanent, while the motivation to get them (whether impulsive or well-thought-out) almost certainly is not. A recent NYT chin-stroker makes this point, as does your Mom and at least half your friends. From this point of view, the basic reality of tattoos is permanence. This becomes particularly obvious in the comical-sad litany of misbegotten tattoos in Infinite Jest: tattoos of the names of girls who left, enthusiasms that waned, gods that failed, and mad whims that are sometimes cannot even be recalled. So you’re stuck with a swastika on your chest or something possibly even scarier, and what are you gonna do? DFW takes several pages to consider the question, but it all pretty much comes down to resignation and covering up. And yes, I wouldn’t want to be in this situation, and probably you wouldn’t either.

(Though even in the roughest cases there is some hope.)

But. It seems to me that it is at least as likely that what tattoos really signify is not permanence but impermanence. When I look back over my life, I can find very few things I have consistently loved, believed in, or stood for. I can hardly think of a single thing I felt strongly about in 1990 that I would care to have on my skin now. As much as people go on about their identity as Christians, Trekkies, vegans, or whatever, I always feel that such talk usually makes a false assumption about the stability of any human identity. So given this, my first question would be, what kind of tattoo would be impermanence-proof? I used to think that this would be the really interesting thing about tattoos: they challenge you with a really tough question. But since I can never think of a foolproof answer, I’m not so sure. So now I’m thinking the real question re. tattoos is, how do you square yourself with the impermanence of your identity? From this point of view, the very fact that we ask of tattoos what they likely can’t deliver is the most interesting thing about them. Seen this way, a tattoo is like a stick in a stream. Sometimes the water looks still — maybe you can’t tell if it’s running or not — but if you poke a stick into it you can tell it’s moving. Maybe the value of a tattoo is in part that you probably will grow past the point where it made sense to get it. The value of the image is less what it says about who you really than how it expresses some past version of yourself. The tattoo’s intrinsic aesthetic value (if any) is compounded with something subtler — a kind of curatorship of the self. Maybe the likelihood of obsolescence is a feature, not a bug.

Or whatever. So theorizes someone who (like Tiny Ewell) doesn’t have any tattoos himself but just bugs his friends to show him theirs. A few fellow academics have been kind enough to share photos and descriptions of their tatts, all of which are gloriously cool and original and seem as likely as any to stand the test of time. The one that got me thinking of this whole line of thought belongs to Brad Osborn, a music theorist at KU whose tatt will be immediately identifiable to music theory nerds:

perspectives tatt

Robin James, a philosopher and sound artist at UNC Charlotte, has a full sleeve:

photo-1

Robin has a thoughtful approach to conceiving and planning a tattoo, and to me it really paid off. She writes,

I just wanted a visually interesting tattoo–something more “design-y” than representational, something that looked good from a distance (you can still see the pattern/design). The two images are Sputnik 1 & Voyager 1. I picked those because I’m a longtime scifi/space opera fan, so that sort of imagery is really appealing to me, as is the mid-century design of those ships. I guess I also picked them b/c they’re historically significant, but mainly I picked them b/c they look good on my arm.

Phil Gentry, a musicology prof. at U. of Delaware and longtime musicoloblogger probably well-known to most of the Dial M readership, has a tattoo of a score by John Cage:

54_548750921616_7543_n

Phil writes,

My standard joke is that I got it so that when other John Cage scholars challenge me, I can whip it out and question their commitment to the subject. In reality, I got it in graduate school for sappy sentimental reasons–it’s one of Cage’s “62 mesostics re: merce cunningham,” which is to say, closest thing to a love song Cage wrote.

Those are the academic tattoos that colleagues have shared with me, but in the interests of fueling my creepy obsession with other people’s skin art, I strongly encourage my tattooed readers to send me pictures of their own. It’s a new reader challenge! Haven’t had one of those since like 2008 or something. Drop me a note at my uni email: fordp at indiana dot edu

A few more geeky academic/artsy/intellectual tatts before you go. One I wish I’d thought of is Jonathan Lethem’s tattoo of the Ubik aerosol can from the cover of one of Philip K. Dick’s trippiest and best novels:

lethem ubik tattoo

You can’t really see it; this is the design:

ubik_f

Another writer, Carey Harrison, has the entire first page of Theodor Adorno’s Minima Moralia tattooed on his back:

adorno tatt

Librarians, for some reason, seem particularly prone to getting tattoos, and as librarians tend to be awesome, so too are their tatts. My favorite is a card from some alternative-universe tarot deck — Arcanum XXII, “The Librarian”:

librarian tatt

If you do a Google image search of “music tattoos,” you get a pretty mixed bag. A lot of music tatts land in what my wife calls “piano scarf” territory. (You know, like those music-novelty gifts bedecked with treble clefs and noteheads that your aunt gives you for your birthday because she knows you’re a musician.) But as Phil’s tatt shows, avant-garde graphic notation offers real scope for a distinctive and visually-interesting design. Here’s one last tatt — a score to Brian Eno’s Music for Airports:

eno_tattoo

I don’t think I’ve exhausted this topic yet.


16 Apr 00:13

Narnia: Only One Right Answer

by Ana Mardoll
[Narnia Content Note: Genocide, Religious Abuse, Chivalry, Racism, Slavery]
Extra Content Note: Suicide, Contempt of Consent, Disproportionate Punishment]

Narnia Recap: Our heroes meet a retired Star.

Voyage of the Dawn Treader, Chapter 14: The Beginning of the End of the World

We're gonna try to whip through Chapter 14 in one week, for a couple of reasons. One, the first half of the chapter is mostly world-building around Ramandu and Coriakin as stars, none of which is particularly noteworthy this far after the fact and in light of the fact that, you know, Coriakin keeps slaves. And Ramandu doesn't give very many shits apparently about his own ensorcelled prisoners. So wev.

Two, the main thrust of this chapter--Caspian's brow-beating of the Reluctant Sailors--has already been touched on in a previous post, so we can return to that and mop up some of the theologies that we didn't get to yet. So let's get started!

   SLOWLY THE DOOR OPENED AGAIN AND out there came a figure as tall and straight as the girl’s but not so slender. It carried no light but light seemed to come from it. As it came nearer, Lucy saw that it was like an old man. His silver beard came down to his bare feet in front and his silver hair hung down to his heels behind and his robe appeared to be made from the fleece of silver sheep. He looked so mild and grave that once more all the travelers rose to their feet and stood in silence.

This is your regularly-scheduled reminder that things which look human but aren't human, are evil. Except when they're not, I guess. I do kinda like how, just like with Ramandu's daughter in the last chapter, the Caspian Team all immediately give deep honor and respect to this person based entirely on how he looks. Whereas, you know, so many chapters ago, they were sneering at Governor Gumpas for being "a bilious-looking man with hair that had once been red and was now mostly gray". Obviously that's awesome. (Shoulda gone with silver hair instead of gray, Gumpas! Better luck next time!)

   Then something seemed to be flying at them out of the very center of the rising sun: but of course one couldn’t look steadily in that direction to make sure. [...] They were birds, large and white, and they came by hundreds and thousands and alighted on everything; on the grass, and the pavement, on the table, on your shoulders, your hands, and your head, till it looked as if heavy snow had fallen. 

The birds give a special type of food to the old man (either fruit or a live coal), and then literally clear the table: they eat all the food and take away anything that can't be consumed. Later that night (at the end of the chapter), the food will be "magically renewed" and okay. You know? Okay. I don't need to point out that there is starvation and slavery and scarcity in other parts of this world, do I? No, I didn't think so. This is either gonna work for you as a "eye on the sparrow" magical neat interlude, or you're gonna be uncharitable like me and ask why the Emperor's manna isn't being dropped off in a more convenient location. Either way is a valid response to the book, I think.

   Now at last the Old Man turned to the travelers and bade them welcome.“Sir,” said Caspian, “will you tell us how to undo the enchantment which holds these three Narnian Lords asleep.”
   “I will gladly tell you that, my son,” said the Old Man. “To break this enchantment you must sail to the World’s End, or as near as you can come to it, and you must come back having left at least one of your company behind.”
   “And what must happen to that one?” asked Reepicheep.
   “He must go on into the utter east and never return into the world.”
   “That is my heart’s desire,” said Reepicheep.

Hey, that's super convenient! But, you know, this essentially means that if you're in the same room as someone who touches the Knife of Longinus, you're not waking up until someone in this world commits what is, canonically, suicide for you. Going to heaven and never coming back is, as Fred Clark has aptly pointed out elsewhere, dying. It may be a more comfortable death than the other ones on offer, but it's still joining the choir invisible.

And I reckon all this makes Reepicheep our Narnian Saint Paul who has fought the good fight and run the race and is ready for his rest and reward. But in a typically more feisty Lewisian kind of way: Reepicheep doesn't long for heaven because he's tired or because he is finished now that the civil war has been won or because he doesn't want to labor any longer with the burden of his dead countrypeople, most of whom were slaughtered in the last 300 years. No, he wants to get to heaven in order to plant a FIRST! flag, like heaven is an internet comment field.

Anyway, Ramandu mentions that he is, or was, or whatever state-of-being verb you'd like, a Star.

   “Golly,” said Edmund under his breath. “He’s a retired star.”   “Aren’t you a star any longer?” asked Lucy.
   “I am a star at rest, my daughter,” answered Ramandu. “When I set for the last time, decrepit and old beyond all that you can reckon, I was carried to this island. I am not so old now as I was then. Every morning a bird brings me a fire-berry from the valleys in the Sun, and each fire-berry takes away a little of my age. And when I have become as young as the child that was born yesterday, then I shall take my rising again (for we are at earth’s eastern rim) and once more tread the great dance.”
   [...] And in this world you have already met a star: for I think you have been with Coriakin.”   “Is he a retired star, too?” said Lucy.
   “Well, not quite the same,” said Ramandu. “It was not quite as a rest that he was set to govern the Duffers. You might call it a punishment. He might have shone for thousands of years more in the southern winter sky if all had gone well.”
   “What did he do, Sir?” asked Caspian.
   “My son,” said Ramandu, “it is not for you, a son of Adam, to know what faults a star can commit. 

Well, for the love of Pete, why did you bring it up. That's just rude, I think. But beyond that, I am dubious about a system of criminal judgment which puts people who have committed crimes in the position of owning other people as slaves. And I feel like we're scratching the surface of something genuinely awful and ugly, like if Coriakin had wanted to own slaves, then that would have been a Bad Thing, but if owning slaves was thrust upon him by higher powers, then that makes it all okay.

Which, come to think of it, is pretty much how Prince Caspian justified that a twelve-year-old should rule over the people his people just spent 300 years genociding. So there's that, but I'm giving a seriously side-eye to a moral system which insists that people not be judged by their actions (like being a shit king, or being a shit slave-owner), but rather judged on the basis of whether or not they "wanted" the power they then turn around and abuse. This reminds me (as so much of this does lately) of Fred's Clark take on the theology in the Left Behind books here:

Rayford hasn’t done a single thing to try to stop him. Worse than that, Rayford has assisted and enabled this slaughter.

The authors do not seem to think that this makes Rayford culpable for the mass-death they’re now describing, but I don’t see any way to avoid that conclusion. Nicolae is killing people. Rayford is helping him.

and here:

This twisted soteriology of faith-versus-works tends to produce an equally twisted ethics in which what one does never matters, only what one feels or thinks about it. Intent becomes the only morally significant variable.

This is true in these books for “good” characters as well as for the villain. That’s why our heroes are excused for co-operating with Nicolae’s slaughter. They may have obediently carried out his every command, but their thoughts and feelings were disloyal.

On the one hand, I'm aware that comparing C.S. Lewis' theology to Tim LaHaye's theology will probably cause some heads in the audience to explode. On the other hand, I don't know how to resolve this repeated pounding of the twin drums that (a) intent is all that matters and actions don't matter in the least, and (b) power is best conferred by bestowing it on people who don't want it, aren't prepared for it, or shouldn't have it, because then (because bizarro-logic!) they won't abuse it like those power-seeking power-mongers obviously would. I mean, when Douglas Adams wrote up this problem:

To summarize: it is a well-known fact that those people who must want to rule people are, ipso facto, those least suited to do it. To summarize the summary: anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job. To summarize the summary of the summary: people are a problem.

he was being satirical. A ruler of the universe who refuses to believe in the existence of the universe is not actually going to result in a good universe for people. So to, a little kid who doesn't want to be king because that's a lot of responsibility and he'd rather sail around the world on a fancy quest is not going to be a good king. And a sinful star thrown to earth for some unknown act of rebellion against the powers that be isn't going to be a good master to the poor sods given to him to rule. DUH.

Anyway, Reepicheep says that of course they're gonna sail to the end of the world because why wouldn't they, etc.

   “I think the same, Reepicheep,” replied Caspian. “And even if it were not so, it would break my heart not to go as near the World’s End as the Dawn Treader will take us. But I am thinking of the crew. They signed on to seek the seven lords, not to reach the rim of the Earth. If we sail east from here we sail to find the edge, the utter east. And no one knows how far it is. They’re brave fellows, but I see signs that some of them are weary of the voyage and long to have our prow pointing to Narnia again. I don’t think I should take them further without their knowledge and consent.

Let the record show the following:

1. The crew did not sign on to reach the rim of the earth; if Caspian asks them to do so, he's asking them to do something they didn't agree to when they signed up for this mission. 

2. Caspian believes the crew to be "brave fellows" who are "weary of the voyage" and that they would like to go home. He also expresses sympathy for them.

3. Caspian feels that they shouldn't sail further without the informed consent of the crew.

I agree with all this. But, hey, look over there a puppy--Rhoop is put into a dreamless (and presumably healing) sleep until the Dawn Treader returns--and when we come back from the puppy distraction, we get this:

   “What some of us have been wanting to ask for a long time, your Majesty, is how we’re ever to get home when we do turn, whether we turn here or somewhere else. It’s been west and northwest winds all the way, barring an occasional calm. And if that doesn’t change, I’d like to know what hopes we have of seeing Narnia again. There’s not much chance of supplies lasting while we row all that way.” 
   “That’s landsman’s talk,” said Drinian. “There’s always a prevailing west wind in these seas all through the late summer, and it always changes after the New Year. We’ll have plenty of wind for sailing westward; more than we shall like from all accounts.”
   “That’s true, Master,” said an old sailor who was a Galmian by birth. “You get some ugly weather rolling up from the east in January and February. And by your leave, Sire, if I was in command of this ship, I’d say to winter here and begin the voyage home in March.”

Ye gods, I don't even with the consistency in these books. Drinian is not any more of an experienced sailor than anyone else on this ship--he literally cannot be--and even if he were, these seas are uncharted. Drinian cannot know that there's "always" a prevailing wind "in these seas" because no one has ever gone to these seas and reported back before. Even Ramandu, the Star, doesn't know what the further seas hold. So this is in no way informed consent of anything, just to be clear.

Now we've gotta have more words from Rynelf than I think we've had from him in the entire book: 

   “Your Majesties and gentlemen and ladies all,” said Rynelf, “there’s just one thing I want to say. There’s not one of us chaps as was pressed on this journey. We’re volunteers. And there’s some here that are looking very hard at that table and thinking about king’s feasts who were talking very loud about adventures on the day we sailed from Cair Paravel, and swearing they wouldn’t come home till we’d found the end of the world. And there were some standing on the quay who would have given all they had to come with us. It was thought a finer thing then to have a cabin-boy’s berth on the Dawn Treader than to wear a knight’s belt. I don’t know if you get the hang of what I’m saying. But what I mean is that I think chaps who set out like us will look as silly as—as those Dufflepuds—if we come home and say we got to the beginning of the world’s end and hadn’t the heart to go further.”

So, lemme add this up... carry the nine... we've got "Nobody Forced Us To Come" as though that were in any way relevant to whether anyone is forcing them to continue, "What Are You Chicken" because that's definitely the best way to get someone to make an informed consent decision, "It's a Privilege Just To Be Here" which is definitely true except in the sense that it isn't, and a broad smattering of shaming and racism by invoking the Dufflepuds.

   “This isn’t going to be much fun,” whispered Edmund to Caspian. “What are we to do if half those fellows hang back?”
   “Wait,” Caspian whispered back. “I’ve still a card to play.”
   [...] At this point Caspian jumped to his feet. “Friends,” he said, “I think you have not quite understood our purpose. You talk as if we had come to you with our hat in our hand, begging for shipmates. It isn’t like that at all. We and our royal brother and sister and their kinsman and Sir Reepicheep, the good knight, and the Lord Drinian have an errand to the world’s edge. It is our pleasure to choose from among such of you as are willing those whom we deem worthy of so high an enterprise. We have not said that any can come for the asking. That is why we shall now command the Lord Drinian and Master Rhince to consider carefully what men among you are the hardest in battle, the most skilled seamen, the purest in blood, the most loyal to our person, and the cleanest of life and manners; and to give their names to us in a schedule.” 
   He paused and went on in a quicker voice, “Aslan’s mane!” he exclaimed. “Do you think that the privilege of seeing the last things is to be bought for a song? Why, every man that comes with us shall bequeath the title of Dawn Treader to all his descendants, and when we land at Cair Paravel on the homeward voyage he shall have either gold or land enough to make him rich all his life. Now—scatter over the island, all of you. In half an hour’s time I shall receive the names that Lord Drinian brings me.”

I... just... have... no words. The irony is that this actually comes across as worse to me, after having heard Caspian be (for a very short moment and just to indemnify him from criticism, I'm sure) a decent human being for five seconds. But now that he's shown me that he's capable of empathizing with his crew, however briefly, it's just that much more jarring when he leaps to his feet and screams his racist, classist, Christianist, exclusionary, reverse-psychology screed at them.

I wanna just point out that before all this, Ramandu said:

   “My son,” said the star, “it would be no use, even though you wished it, to sail for the World’s End with men unwilling or men deceived. That is not how great unenchantments are achieved. They must know where they go and why

C.S. Lewis wrote those words. And then he wrote Caspian's speech up there. And he thinks that the result--the fact that the sailors get on the boat after and sail into the unknown--constitutes men who are willing, men who are undeceived, and men who freely chose their fate.

There's.... there's no way to deconstruct that. A character who says he feels sympathy for his crew, and who says he wants their honest, unforced, informed consent, just cannot and does not mesh with a character whose actions convey nothing but contempt for who those crew members are, for their choices, for their decisions, for them as people. One of these things can be true: either Caspian respects his crew, or he doesn't. And since actions speak louder than words--and since words are more likely to be self-serving lies--we end up listening to his actions.

Anything left to say is just that same fact over and over again.

Oh, and also, the sailors' "willingness" is being forced by magic too, because of course it is. What did you think Narnia was about, consent while in an unmeddled-with state of mind? Ha, here, have some Turkish Delight:

   Meanwhile Caspian’s speech, helped perhaps by some magic of the island, was having just the effect he intended. A good many who had been anxious enough to get out of the voyage felt quite differently about being left out of it. 

Let the record show that, by the rules laid out by Ramandu, this means they can never reach the World's End and disenchant the sailors. Logically, everything after this chapter is a lying fever-dream being had by Caspian in the throes of lethal dehydration. 

   And of course whenever any one sailor announced that he had made up his mind to ask for permission to sail, the ones who hadn’t said this felt that they were getting fewer and more uncomfortable. So that before the half-hour was nearly over several people were positively “sucking up” to Drinian and Rhince (at least that was what they called it at my school) to get a good report. And soon there were only three left who didn’t want to go, and those three were trying very hard to persuade others to stay with them. And very shortly after that there was only one left. And in the end he began to be afraid of being left behind all on his own and changed his mind.

OK. OK? OK. Here is the thing.

The thing, it is here. These books are Christian allegory, or whatever high-faluting word that Lewis preferred to apply to it. Aslan is Jesus. The End of the World is heaven (or, in this case here, a glimpse of it, since only Reepicheep gets to stay).

We've already mentioned, briefly, that the reason Susan was left behind was because (imo) Lewis wanted to undercut those Once Saved Always Saved Calvinists and point out that it's possible, in his theology, to become estranged from god. And we've pointed out (again, imo) how this would have been a better lesson if the person left behind wasn't the person who always had the ickiest "sinful" vibe around her, if Lewis had chosen for his scapegoat Peter or Lucy--someone who seemed "safe" but wasn't.

That sort of lesson would still have been, in my opinion, cruel to both the reader and the character, but it would have been a better, purer example of the theology I think Lewis is trying to convey: (a) no one earns their salvation and (b) no one is safe in their salvation. So no matter how good King Peter is, he can't earn his way into heaven with that goodness, and no matter how saved he seemed to be, that doesn't mean he's a shoo-in for the kingdom of heaven. And by saving Susan, he could have illustrated that (c) even the "worst" of sinners can be covered by grace, again underscoring that salvation is not an earned thing.

Here we have a sort of similar parable: the crew, unlike Reepicheep, have fought the good fight (and some of them have even died on this voyage!) and run the good race, and they are tired. They want to lay down their cause and give up and go home to an easier, better existence, and theologies be damned. To Caspian, and I would suspect to Lewis, this is sheer foolishness, the idea of giving up eternal life honor in exchange for an easier, temporary life--sure, you get to eat good food and sleep in soft beds and enjoy the company of friends and family and people who bathe regularly and aren't sweaty muscular sea-men, but what is that life compared with honor, etc.

So, okay, maybe I don't agree with all the theologies there, but long story short, the doubting crew is brought around to the right way of thinking and they all get on the boat and sail to paradise. Our father who art our shepherd cares for the tiniest lost lamb and the most stubborn sweaty muscular sailor, etc.

Except one.

Because fuck him, amiright.

   [...] Caspian accepted all the men but that one who had changed his mind at the last moment. His name was Pittencream and he stayed on the Island of the Star all the time the others were away looking for the World’s End, and he very much wished he had gone with them. He wasn’t the sort of man who could enjoy talking to Ramandu and Ramandu’s daughter (nor they to him), and it rained a good deal, and though there was a wonderful feast on the Table every night, he didn’t very much enjoy it.
   He said it gave him the creeps sitting there alone (and in the rain as likely as not) with those four Lords asleep at the end of the Table. And when the others returned he felt so out of things that he deserted on the voyage home at the Lone Islands, and went and lived in Calormen, where he told wonderful stories about his adventures at the End of the World, until at last he came to believe them himself. So you may say, in a sense, that he lived happily ever after. But he could never bear mice.

So Pittencream (who does not get a nice name, because fuck him amiright) doesn't enjoy sitting around with ensorcelled people or getting soaked in the rain or being (literally) devoid of human contact and he can't even pass the time flirting with the girl who is clearly going to be the next queen of Narnia because you know that Caspian wouldn't be okay with some Tristan and Isolde action going on under his nose. He sounds awful and definitely deserving of all the bad things.

I find myself here, at the end of Chapter 14, flailing a bit. It's worth pointing out, again, that every word on a page represents a choice. These books aren't history; they're fiction. And given a choice between Caspian relenting and bringing this last lost sheep into the fold versus the choice of kicking him to the curb to be miserable for the rest of his life--and such gleeful misery it is, too, I mean he went to live in Calormen if you can imagine--Lewis picked the latter.

He picked an exclusionary moral to an inclusive one. And did so in order to underscore a more lesson that seems to be more Lewisian than Christian--I, ahem, seem to remember a lot of Bible stories about people being saved at the last minute and for ignoble reasons like not wanting to be left behind. Here Lewis seems to be staking a claim that that theology is too inclusive for his tastes, and the riff-raff need to be kept out in order to keep the other ruffians properly in line. 

Nor is it even outlined in text why Caspian chooses to leave behind Pittencream. If there's a logic behind it besides just mean-spirited vindictiveness, it would presumably be the logic that he wants to teach the crew a lesson to not mutiny again. Which, if this had been a mutiny, might hold some water, but that ignores the fact that it wasn't--Caspian went to them and asked for their informed consent to extend their contract clause over something that wasn't negotiated for, an extension of the voyage and of the goals of that voyage. So instead the lesson really becomes "the next time I ask for your opinion, you'll say what I want you to say", which means that we're now in 50 Shades of Grey. Again.

And in case you can't wade through the 50 Shades stuff to get to the money quote I want to share from Cliff, here it is:

The "you have to be honest with me" thing really sets me off, because I got a lot of that. A lot of "how can I trust you, you have to tell the truth" silently accompanied by "but it better be a very specific truth or you're in big trouble."

I've complained before that Narnia suffered from lack of a good editor; someone who could have noticed the terribly lack of continuity in places. In some sense, it's possible that we're seeing some of that here--much of this scene does read like a lukewarm mutiny if you can ignore the bits where Caspian and Ramandu stress the necessity of consent in this situation. (And in fact, I've even previously described it as a mutiny scene, because it does read that way to me in large parts.)

It fits into the usual Cowardly Crew / Lukewarm Followers theme for these sorts of stories. And if it were a mutiny, a real one with actual danger and not just inconvenience, then it might make some sort of sense to punish a figurehead of rebellion when you can't punish the whole crew and if, if, pardoning everyone and coming to a better understanding isn't an option. If. If. If. Cannot stress that often enough.

But that mutiny scene isn't this scene. This scene is the one where Caspian goes "with our hat in our hand, begging for shipmates" (even though he claims he isn't), and says, "oh, hey, I know we only contracted you guys to carpet the living room and bedrooms, but can you also do the den and the basement while you're here? And also no one has even been in the basement before and you might not come back alive, thanks." And then despite claiming that he cares about consent and about the safety and feelings of these "brave fellows", he arbitrarily singles out for a genuinely awful punishment the guy who has the bad luck to jump on the bandwagon last.

If that weren't tragic enough, this is occurring in a book where the sailors haven't even had names or voices for most of the book. This is occurring in a book where the sailors won't go on to the end of the world because, oh, hey, the ocean got too shallow so nevermind I guess. This is occurring in a book where the whole other crew or crews that ferried the Lost Lords here are completely missing and never even remarked upon.

And it's in this book that a sailor named Pittencream has his life completely ruined--ran away, didn't go home, didn't go back to his wages, and left the job he must have worked hard to get if indeed "It was thought a finer thing then to have a cabin-boy’s berth on the Dawn Treader than to wear a knight’s belt."--because he didn't consent to what Caspian wanted him to consent to fast enough. Which means, really, that he didn't have any consent in the first place, if anything except the "right" answer would result in disproportionate punishment.

Yet Caspian, Ramandu, and Lewis all seem to consider this the epitome of informed consent. I don't know how to deal with that.
15 Apr 21:58

The Kobayashi Maru Is Not Usually Mass Market

by Damion Schubert

On one hand, I am sympathetic to how fast, and how transparently, game developers rip each other off in the casual and mobile space. It’s particularly galling when the company doing the ripping off has the gall to file legal action against people who came before them. So on one hand, the saga of 2048/Threes is familiar and depressing, and not at all surprising, give that we’re talking about a game design so simple and elegant it likely will be a tutorial lesson in game development classes for years to come. Hearing the dev team of Threes speak out about feeling ripped off, as well as this spirited defense here – well, it certainly makes you want to take sides.

On the OTHER hand, I did note this one paragraph in the Three’s developer’s litany of sour grapes.

But why is Threes better? It’s better for us, for our goals. 2048 is a broken game. Something we noticed about this kind of system early on (that you’ll see hidden in the emails below). We wanted players to be able to play Threes over many months, if not years. We both beat 2048 on our first tries.

Get that? The Threes developers are irritated because they made an unwinnable game, and are mad that someone else made a winnable version of it. This is like the makers of Demon Souls getting mad that it turns out the mass market prefers playing Diablo.

Now, don’t get me wrong — making a more hardcore game is a tried and true tradition, and there is definitely room in the market for games that take a harder edge – Demon Souls, Ultima Online and Banished are all great examples of this. And there’s certainly a tendency for easy games to add harder modes later, such as Hardcore Diablo, which adds permadeath for those players who want to experience how brutally unfair network lag can actually be.

But game genres have historically ALWAYS backed down from what designers consider appropriate levels of difficulty to more mass market ideas of difficulty over time. We almost ALWAYS start too hard, and back it up. As an easy to reach for example, hardcore MUD players (Text MMOs before MMOs) were aghast at how noobish the death penalties were in Ultima Online. You only dropped all your stuff – you didn’t lose a full level equivalent of character growth! WoW simplified it even further – a minor durability penalty and a short ghost run. On SWTOR, we simplified it further to a respawn in place (which Diablo also does). It turns out that for many players, the shame and knowledge that you failed is more than appropriate enough.

2048 may be heavily inspired by Threes (or more accurately, by 1024, a go-between). But the difference in difficulty means, quite simply, that the two are decidedly different games. One simple, challenging but beatable game experience. The other is the Kobayashi Maru. Especially given the market that buys these casual games, it’s really not surprising why one caught fire over the other.

15 Apr 20:02

Key to Understanding to US Politics

by Josh Marshall

One of the single-most important factors to understanding US politics: The more money you have, the more likely you are to vote. Look at the chart.

14 Apr 23:39

Young Girl's Dreams Dashed

by Josh Marshall

8 year old Olivia McConnell had a dream of having the Wooly Mammoth declared the official state fossil of South Carolina. And a law to make it so was on the verge of passage before getting held up on State Sen. Kevin Bryant (R) insistence that the authorizing legislation specify that the God created the mammoth on the "on the sixth day with the beasts of the field."

14 Apr 23:34

i made an offhand observation to my boyfriend and it seemed worth jotting down he was talking about...

i made an offhand observation to my boyfriend and it seemed worth jotting down

he was talking about when he had lost interest in his piano lessons, and i thought he was saying, well, if i could not be a concert pianist, why do it

and i said i felt that way about painting and drawing myself — i want to be one of the best (because..?)

speaking more existentially, he pointed out, we are all just meaningless flesh bags pretty much so why get so obsessed with it

to which i replied, well what else is there?

enjoying things, friends, food, etc.

but when you have been depressed, i said without much reflection beforehand, you dont feel anything, and so you cant trust that. you cant trust enjoying living

which seemed kind of fucked up to say but it struck me, because i had never put the thought together consciously for myself before, but it seemed self-evident as soon as i said it

sometimes i daydream about a point of return, some home i have left, a person i once knew, a city, and i think it is just wishing for the time before i knew depression

14 Apr 23:32

Photo



14 Apr 23:25

i aspire to be a more perfect traitor to men and whiteness

but how?

14 Apr 19:23

April 12, 2014


10 Apr 05:47

The Internet Will Never Be Secure, Ever

by Giles Bowkett
Because it's written in C.

To quote yaakov34 on Hacker News:

There was a discussion here a few years ago about memory vulnerabilities in C. Some people tried to argue back then that various protections offered by modern OSs and runtimes, such as address space randomization, and the availability of tools like Valgrind for finding memory access bugs, mitigates this...

My opinion, then and now, is that C and other languages without memory checks are unsuitable for writing secure code...

This vulnerability is the result of yet another missing bound check. It wasn't discovered by Valgrind or some such tool, since it is not normally triggered - it needs to be triggered maliciously or by a testing protocol which is smart enough to look for it (a very difficult thing to do, as I explained on the original thread).

The fact is that no programmer is good enough to write code which is free from such vulnerabilities. Programmers are, after all, trained and skilled in following the logic of their program. But in languages without bounds checks, that logic can fall away as the computer starts reading or executing raw memory, which is no longer connected to specific variables or lines of code in your program. All non-bounds-checked languages expose multiple levels of the computer to the program...

We can't end all bugs in software, but we can plug this seemingly endless source of bugs which has been affecting the Internet since the Morris worm. It has now cost us a two-year window in which 70% of our internet traffic was potentially exposed. It will cost us more before we manage to end it.


To clarify, if you're not familiar with C, you might not realize that it basically makes all of its memory available to any code at any time. It's kind of a counter-intuitive design choice.

For those who grew up on Java, unmanaged memory is like having all your data in one giant array and passing indexes around. For performance.

— Reginald Braithwaite (@raganwald) April 8, 2014


So the comment is saying the problem with Internet security is that the entire Internet, and the entirety of every Unix-style operating system, is based on the foundation of a programming language which allows you to read arbitrary data out of memory.

This is indeed a very big problem. If you want security, you probably don't want an entire online economy built on C.

The only thing I don't like about the comment is that the last few sentences:

we can plug this seemingly endless source of bugs which has been affecting the Internet since the Morris worm. It has now cost us a two-year window in which 70% of our internet traffic was potentially exposed. It will cost us more before we manage to end it.

Can we, really? How? Who the fuck is going to pay for that?

Here's what we would have to do first: rewrite every Unix-style operating system from the ground up in a new language. And that's the easy part. Afterwards, we would have to make this new operating system, or group of operating systems, so easy to use and install that everybody who already has stuff installed and running out there in the big wide Web would find it cost-effective to start over with a new operating system. We would then have to repeat the process for every programming language written in C.

What are the fucking odds? We live in a world where COBOL and Fortran became hot languages in 1999 because of the Y2K bug.

It's theoretically possible that a really, really savvy government could fund such a project, but that's not the world we live in. This is the government we actually have:



Unixes are old, and deep, and complicated. It is much easier to understand Unix (and friends) through the lens of an archaeological dig than it is to build a mental model of it as a coherent, well-designed piece of engineering. It has layers and layers and layers of systems which all interact successfully, without being designed to be aware of each other in any sense at all. The whole reason Unix works is because it has this very simple "everything is a file" paradigm, which enables lots and lots of small, highly specific programs at the system level to interact with much larger and more complex software at the application level, using very simple and manageable interfaces.

When it comes to security, though, because everything's built on C, it's less like "everything is a file" and more like "everything is a fail." It is utterly inevitable that more problems like Heartbleed will occur. Our entire online economy is built on an inherently unsafe foundation.

Long story short, the only way to get a secure Internet is to completely rebuild every part of it from scratch. That's just not how technological advances occur. People build on the stuff that is already there. The team behind Go probably want to do this kind of total Internet rebuild, and replace HTTP with SPDY while they're at it, but not even Google has enough Imperial stormtroopers to pull off that kind of coup.
04 Apr 07:14

A Teaching Philosophy I’m Not Ashamed Of

by Ben Orlin

I’ve always dreaded being asked for my “teaching philosophy.”

3

For years, I gave nonsense or scattershot answers. “Logic and critical thinking are paramount.” “I care more about conceptual understanding than computational skill.” “A balanced, student-centered approach is always best.” “We buzzword to buzzword, not for the buzzword, but for the buzzword.” At best, each of my disjointed half-theories captured only a piece of the puzzle.

2

Worse still, none of my replies explained why I devote so much class time to plain old practice. If I was such an enlightened liberal educator, why did I assign repetitive computations for homework? On the other hand, if I was a traditionalist at heart, why did I fall head-over-heels for high-minded progressive rhetoric? Was I an old-school wolf, a new-school lamb, or some strange chimera?

4

Well, I’ve finally got my answer, and it only takes eleven words: Math is big ideas, approached from as many angles as possible.

What do I mean by “big ideas”? Well, here are a few examples:

5 6 7 8 9

And what do I mean by “many angles”? I mean that, in our best moments, my students and I come at these ideas like undergraduates approaching a dessert buffet: relentlessly, purposefully, and from all sides.

First: the historical angle. Even when the names-and-dates history doesn’t fit into my lesson plans, I try to contextualize each idea as part of a long lineage, to show how it answers a question, unlocks a door, fills a hole. I want my students to see each idea as one scene in a grand narrative of mathematical discovery.

10

Second: the verbal angle. English class isn’t the “opposite” of math class, as too many students think. Rather, good language skills empower us to discuss ideas of all types and stripes, especially mathematical ones. A precise and evocative vocabulary is beyond precious. Language allows us to debate productively, to learn as a collective, to think as a team.

11

Third: the scientific angle. Math’s most explosive ideas send shockwaves throughout the sciences. Physics, obviously—but also economics, biology, geology, chemistry, even psychology and sociology. Math has a symbiotic relationship with the sciences: it furnishes them with a powerful toolkit, and they provide it with concrete examples, a corporeal form for its abstracted soul.

12

Fourth: practice. Math without any computational practice is a mushy math, a math with no spine. To understand what makes, say, linear equations tick, you’ve got to solve ‘em, graph ‘em, play with ‘em in a hundred different ways. You can’t grasp patterns until you’ve worked through examples. Without multiplication facts at your fingertips, you’re unlikely ever to apprehend deep truths about the distributive property. If you’ve never spent a day multiplying out products of the form (ax + b)(cx + d), then you’ll never internalize the methods for factoring quadratics.

13

So there you have it. Big ideas from many angles.

I don’t always succeed from every angle—I might botch the history, or shortchange students on practice, or be just plain ignorant of the relevant applications. But that’s why I’m glad my students have other teachers—each with their own philosophy, each in their own distinctive way enriching our students’ understanding of those crucial big ideas.


04 Apr 07:06

why purity culture doesn’t teach consent

by forgedimagination

cherry blossoms

I’m a Star Trek fan, and yes– it’s related. I grew up watching Star Trek loyally, and I’m pretty sure Captain Kathryn Janeway is one of the few reasons why I managed to be somewhat normal. So, when Enterprise began airing, I watched every single episode, and Phlox, a Denobulan doctor, quickly became one of my favorites. “The Breach” is one of the few episodes dedicated to his character, and it explores an ethical dilemma: he has been ordered by the captain to treat a patient even though this patient has repeatedly refused to be treated. To the human captain, it’s a simple matter of saving a life, but to Phlox, it was far more complicated.

As I was watching the episode, I realized there was something rather awesome about Denobulan culture: it is based entirely on consent. To treat a patient without his or her consent would violate everything Phlox believed about ethics and morality. I turned to my partner and announced that we were moving to Denobula, physics and reality be damned.

If there is a single idea that I desperately want to communicate to every single last person on the planet, it’s this one: Consent.

Western culture understands consent inside a few limited contexts– but even in most of those contexts, consent can be overruled if the circumstances are right. One of the areas where consent seems to completely fly out the window is when we’re talking about The Sex, although that is very, very slowly improving. However, in environments that encourage Purity in the form of Virginity, consent . . . just doesn’t show up. The only time I’ve heard consent mentioned has been to mock the very idea– “the world says that sex is fine as long as it’s “consensual”– but we know better than that, don’t we?” complete with obligatory scare quotes around “consensual.”

I’ve been struggling, trying to figure out why it seems so difficult for evangelical purity advocates to talk about consent, why the idea is mocked when it’s presented, and why no one seems to care about consent when it seems, at least to me, absolutely foundational when it comes to sexual interactions. Why does it seem to be more typical for those who teach purity to advocate for the opposite of consent? Why do some of them actively pursue the idea that marital rape is impossible– that being married is automatic consent? Or, if they’re not intentionally teaching against consent, why does it never seem to get mentioned?

Well, and I’m positive I’m not the first person to think of this, but I had an epiphany this morning.

They don’t teach consent because teaching consent would undermine one of their basic assumptions about people. Namely, the assumption that every single last person– most especially men, but also women– are basically nymphos who are straining at their leashes every single second of every single day and if you let that sex-crazed beast out for even just a moment then BAM it’s all over and you’re not a virgin anymore and that’s horrible because now you’re a half-eaten candybar or a cup full of spit.

This is why the “how far is too far?” question is almost unanimously answered with “you can’t do anything that might get your motor going, because the second you’re aroused– at all– there’s virtually nothing you’ll be able to do to stop yourself from having sex.”

To them, consent is always guaranteed. There’s no such thing as a person who would say no to an opportunity to have sex. Ever. The only thing you have to do to give consent is be alive.

If you start walking around teaching the idea that some people may not want to have sex with you and you need to ask first, it completely undoes everything they’re teaching about human sexuality. If you remove the ominous boogeyman of your inner sexual demons, then suddenly it might be ok to start exploring your pants-feelings. Because you can decide whether or not you want to do . . . well, whatever you want to do. Or not.

And it’s the “or not” part that would render most of what they teach almost completely useless. If people are capable of saying no, I don’t want to have sex with you, then teaching people that they cannot ever be alone with someone is sort of pointless. So are all the ridiculous conversations about hand holding and kissing and (God forbid) “heavy petting.”

Purity culture actually strips away empowerment, and agency, and autonomy. And the most horrifying thing about this understanding of human sexuality is that it makes rape non-existent. No one can be raped because we all want it all of the time.


04 Apr 07:02

april fools!!!

by kris

20140401-aprilfools

so — it’s too late for this year, but if you’re thinking about a prank for april fools, try to:

  1. have it start subtle, just inside the realm of possibility
  2. make it progress beyond that realm, adding increasingly absurd elements
  3. by the end it should have fully landed as impossible to anyone who sees it

that’s a good april fools gag. these are not:

  1. an actor believably died
  2. they’re finally making that thing you wanted

“what makes you an expert, kris” you may be asking

i am an expert.

04 Apr 07:01

4 economic facts that say “bootstrap now”

by Amy Hoy

Fact: Since 1970, virtually every penny gained through productivity has ended up in the pockets of capital, rather than labor:

NY Times Chart: Hourly Compensation up 108% since 1950, but productivity up 241%.png

New York Times

Fact: While profits are up 44.7%, incomes are up only 3.9% since 2007.

Incomes +3.9%, Profits +44.7%

New York Times

Fact: Tech workers are not immune. Over 1 million tech & creative workers have been affected by a wage-fixing conspiracy.

Fact: Most venture capital funds do worse than the stock market. When the institutional investors’ behavior catches up to reality, it’s going to be a cold, cold winter in startuplandia.

Conclusion… you’re on your own

Whether you’re at a profit-generating business and making do on the scraps left over after the C-suite and the stock market take their cut…

Or you’re raking it in, relatively speaking, thanks to your high-tech salary at a venture-backed startup…

…you’re on your own.

Either you’re being shortchanged, or you’re in a tenuous position that will falter when the industry has an “adjustment.”

Best recognize it, and plan accordingly.

Bootstrapping is the best of all worlds

When you create your own value-producing products, you create the best possible system of rewards: You help your customers, they thank you with cash. You maintain total control. All profits go to you.

This immediately impacts your own well-being, your family’s well-being, and the well-being of the neighborhood businesses you patronize; if you grow, you have every reason to become a better & more fair employer than the people who employed you.

Yes, it’s slow to start; yes, unless you’ve saved your pennies, you’ll have to do it on the side.

If you’re a designer, developer, writer, or trainer… you’ve got the means of production in your head. You can do it on the side.

Costs for starting up have never been lower. Tools and support for bootstrapping have never been better.

All you have to do is:

And don’t do it alone.

Here’s how to get started:

Get our 7-part, totally-bullshit-free guide to starting a bootstrapped product business in 2014:

Get your free from-scratch bootstrappin' email course

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04 Apr 04:14

I started Dresden Codak nine years ago. Here’s a...



I started Dresden Codak nine years ago. Here’s a comparison of the very first strip I uploaded with the last panel of the most recent page.

In 2005 I was a floundering 21-year-old college student with no direction and growing debt. I drew that snake comic in a statistics class I was failing, and on my way home I decided to scan it and maybe put together a website. I thought if I kept doing that, I could teach myself to draw, as a fun hobby.

Since then, this comic has become my full time job (since 2008), and last year I raised over half a million dollars in the second most successful comics Kickstarter ever. I draw what I like, I have fans all around the globe, and most fortunately, I know what I want to do with my life. In those nine years I’ve had countless people from all corners tell me I couldn’t do this or that, or that I was wasting my time trying something that had no future or point. At the end of the day, though, I can only say “I’ll show you,” and I try to do just that.

Never underestimate the power of time, hard work, and stubbornness.

04 Apr 04:12

Do You Work For Koch Industries?

by Josh Marshall

You may have seen the piece we published earlier this evening about Koch Industries asking employees to embrace and share owner Charles Koch's "vision" of a free society and the threat it faces from the collectivist menace. This is a big, big company. According to the Koch website, the various divisions and subsidiaries and company operating under the Koch Industries banner operate in more than 60 countries and have more than 100,000 employees. But based on our reporting, in at least some parts of it, there's a pretty heavy climate of propagandizing the Koch "vision" of a free society: courses, emails to staffers, just a pervasive climate of the Kochian view of the world, which as we saw from today's WSJ oped seems to have a distinctly Perkinsian flavor to it.

In a 100,000 operation there must be a lot of people who don't share the vision. So if you're in this category and you work for Koch or one of its subsidiaries, can you drop us a line? We'd love to hear the details.

We promise complete anonymity.

03 Apr 07:02

myrastuff: Decided to hop on the bandwagon and draw my HabitRPG...



myrastuff:

Decided to hop on the bandwagon and draw my HabitRPG avatar. I’m level 12 now, and at the risk of tooting my own horn I think I’m starting to look preeetty awesome.

30 Mar 06:05

Nikon D4S boasts 409,600 ISO

by Jason Weisberger
With an ISO rating so high you may need a Neutral Density filter with the lens cap still on, the new Nikon D4S can take photographs of yesterday. From their promotional material: "up to ISO 25,600 (expandable to a mind-boggling ISO 409,600 equivalent at Hi4)" I don't know when I'd need this?