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12 May 05:50

Bridgetown Day Three: W. Kamau Bell and Friends

by Robert Ham

A trans woman, a lesbian, an Indian American man, and a black man walk into a bar in Portland, and turn about 100 white people various shades of uncomfortable.

At least, that’s what emanated from the Analog Theater last night during W. Kamau Bell and Friends, a showcase for the host of the lamentably canceled TV show Totally Biased and a few of his funny friends. You could feel the air shift in the room at various times throughout the evening when discussions of class, gender, and racial issues forced these so-called progressive comedy fans to ask some difficult questions of themselves.

The best example was when trans comic Natasha Muse announced that she and her wife had a baby recently. Usually, that’s a line that would warrant a bit of applause from the audience. Instead, it was greeted with near silence. Were folks still trying to come to terms with the idea that she married a woman? Or wondering how the wife got impregnated? Muse took it in stride and instead turned to her realizing that, in spite of her early insistence that she wouldn’t talk to her baby in a sing-song voice, she soon found out the alternative is much creepier. Try reading these lines in a flat monotone you’ll see what she means: “Who’s a good girl? Are you a good girl? Who’s a dirty girl?”

And so it went through most of the evening. The crowd would veer from awkward silences to gales of laughter. Bell and one of his former cohorts on Totally Biased, Hari Kondabolu, had to deal with the biggest shifts in mood. Folks seemed a little weirded out by Bell’s impression of gun nuts jerking off all over their arsenal of weapons but loved his impression of a conservative forced to applaud the gay Latino who came to Gabrielle Giffords aid right after she was shot in 2011. Too, Kondabolu’s jabs at Portland were welcome, but no one was willing to jibe with his brilliant feminist dick joke (I won’t spell it out for you here; find it on his recently released album Waiting for 2042).

I’m hoping that what came out of last night’s show was what Bell has long wanted from his standup and his TV work: to get people to have those awkward conversations about race, gender, class inequality, etc. Maybe those odd silences and bits of scattered laughter that came along at the more cutting jokes are were the seeds of those discussions being planted. One can only hope. But, hey, at least everyone in the room agreed on one thing Bell pointed out: putting Baron Vaughn’s New Negroes showcase on the MailChimp Stage was maybe not the best decision by Bridgetown organizers.

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12 May 05:30

Woman allegedly records own arrest, gets accused of wiretapping

by David Kravets

A Massachusetts woman faces charges of allegedly using a hidden mobile phone to audio-record her own suspicion-of-disorderly-conduct arrest.

Karen Dziewit, 24 of Chicopee, was allegedly "loud and belligerent" and disturbing her building's tenants early Sunday when police arrested her, according to local media outlet Mass Live. When police inventoried her purse, they said they found a mobile phone secretly recording the incident, allegedly in violation of state wiretapping regulations. Springfield police told Mass Live that the woman slipped the phone in her purse and activated the recording feature before the arrest.

Under Massachusetts law, people may record police officers in public places, but only if the officers are aware that a recording is taking place, according to case law.

Read 2 remaining paragraphs | Comments

12 May 05:23

le Bat

12 May 04:48

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12 May 04:47

spektrmodule: ultrafunnypictures: 222 Golden Retrievers Gather...



spektrmodule:

ultrafunnypictures:

222 Golden Retrievers Gather in Scotland

their purpose is unknown and likely sinister

12 May 04:47

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12 May 04:44

gusmen: “i don’t watch tv” proudly says a person who spend 8 hours a day in the internet

gusmen:

“i don’t watch tv” proudly says a person who spend 8 hours a day in the internet

12 May 04:40

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12 May 02:13

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12 May 00:38

Google Maps Has Forsaken Us

firehose

google is a pretty useless search engine these days

In the days of yore — meaning, in hyper-fast-forward Silicon Valley, five years ago — there were things you could count on, and high on any such list would have been “Google will provide you with relevant search results.”
12 May 00:33

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12 May 00:32

tastefullyoffensive: PSA from the First Lady. [via] (original...





















tastefullyoffensive:

PSA from the First Lady. [via] (original image)

12 May 00:32

pulmonaire: Using 3,604 cups of coffee with different amounts...

firehose

fuck your coffee





pulmonaire:

Using 3,604 cups of coffee with different amounts of milk and coffee to create shading for Mona Lisa’s face. (via)

12 May 00:31

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12 May 00:31

bunnyfood: (insert evil laughter)



bunnyfood:

(insert evil laughter)

12 May 00:31

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12 May 00:28

Sorry, Britain didn’t vote for the Austrian ‘Bearded Lady’ » Spectator Blogs

by gguillotte
firehose

lol spectator, u mad

The blushes of our progressive elite were spared by the suspiciously complex voting system. There is a 50/50 split between unelected and unaccountable judges and the votes of the public; Poland topped the UK’s public voting tally, but were awarded zero points by the UK overall because the unelected judges ranked Poland 25th. Can readers think of any other examples where an out of touch, unelected euro-elite have defied the will of the people?
12 May 00:28

Check Out a Teaser Trailer for NBC's Constantine - ComingSoon.net

by gguillotte
firehose

OK, OK, I could dig it. I could maybe dig it

gonna be weird to have this and Grimm on the same network, though

NBC have posted an impressive 3 minute teaser trailer for the show which you can watch below.
11 May 23:54

sluttynuggets: superhighschoolleveldork: "digital art isn’t real art!!!!1!!!!". is this a...

sluttynuggets:

superhighschoolleveldork:

"digital art isn’t real art!!!!1!!!!".

image

is this a reaction or an example

11 May 23:35

Melbourne Uber Drivers Slapped With $1700 Fines; Service Shuts Down

by timothy
beaverdownunder (1822050) writes "Victoria Australia's Taxi Directorate has begun a crackdown on Melbourne Uber drivers, fining them $1700 each for operating a taxi service illegally, with total fines apparently equalling over $50000. In response, Uber has shut down its Melbourne service, and has refused to comment on whether its drivers will be compensated, since Uber told them they were providing a legal service. (Fined Uber drivers could take the company to the state's consumer tribunal: stay tuned!) Uber is set to meet with the Directorate next week but it is likely the demands the Directorate will place on Uber drivers, such as mandatory criminal record checks, vehicle inspections and insurance, will make the service in Melbourne unviable. Meanwhile, the New South Wales government is awaiting a report to determine if Uber drivers operating in that state are doing so illegally, warning that drivers could face substantial fines if they are found to have been operating in breach of the law. In South Australia, it doesn't even appear Uber will get off the ground — the state has made it clear that those who operate as an Uber driver will be driving without being covered by the state's mandatory insurance coverage, essentially de-registering their vehicle and making them liable for fines and license suspension."

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11 May 23:33

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firehose

menswear beat



11 May 23:33

Toe-shoes company to pay millions for bunk science. I still love my Nike Free 3.0s. Are they bunk too?

firehose

'Runner's World Newswire's Matt McCue reports that though Vibram "expressly [denies] and continues to deny any wrongdoing alleged in the Actions, and neither admits nor concedes any actual or potential fault, wrongdoing or liability," the company has agreed to pay a lot of money.

The initial claim, filed in 2012, accuses Vibram of deceiving consumers by saying that its shoes could "reduce foot injuries and strengthen foot muscles." Unfortunately, Vibram appears to have pulled this out of thin air, really hoping it was true.

It is not true.

Science takes time, and since the advent of Christopher McDougall's best-selling Born to Run (a book based mainly on anecdote that sparked the minimalist footwear revolution), science has discovered that barefoot running can really fuck you up.

"This study showed that increases in bone marrow edema [the precursor to a stress fracture] are more common in subjects who were transitioning to the [Vibram FiveFingers]," concluded this 2013 study.'

11 May 23:32

von-druke: slashseeker: brandyway: WHAT ARE YOU DOING UP WHO...



von-druke:

slashseeker:

brandyway:

WHAT ARE YOU DOING UP

WHO ARE YOU TALKING TO

WHAT ARE THEIR NAMES

ARE YOU SURE THEY’RE NOT PEDOPHILES

OFF THE INTERNET YOUNG LADY

If I fail to reblog this, something is wrong

this is the only time i have literally laughed out loud on tumblr

hi treesofarden

11 May 23:31

Wildly Inappropriate Internal Responses I Have Had To Perfectly Innocuous Statements

by Mallory Ortberg
Courtney shared this story from The ToastThe Toast:
Telling me I will like a person is the surest way to ensure I will hate them.

fire princess“Thanks so much for coming! Tonight was really fun! Drive careful! Be sure to get home safe.”

you go to hell

you’re not the boss of me

i’ll get home however i want

i hope i crash

to

“You’ve just got to meet [X.] You remind me so much of one another. You guys will love each other.”

i hate [X]

[X] is nothing like me, i bet

[X] is human garbage and im a masterpiece like a waterfall or a painting of a dragon

how dare you suggest we’re anything alike

when we probably aren’t

[said in an open, conversational, non-judgmental fashion] “Have you read [Book]?”

NO AND I NEVER WILL

[My cat looks at me]

i dont love you at all

“This was pretty good.”

HOW DARE YOU QUALIFY YOUR PRAISE FOR ME

YOU ARE AN UNLOVEABLE HACK AND I AM A DIRECT DESCENDENT OF THE SUN

THE DEEPEST FEARS YOU HAVE ABOUT YOURSELF, THE ONES THAT WAKE YOU IN YOUR BED AT NIGHT CHOKING IN FEAR, ARE TRUER THAN ANYTHING ELSE IN THE WORLD

“I know what you mean.”

no you don’t

“I don’t care where we go. Anywhere is fine.”

why do you even exist

“I think I’m in love with you.”

well if you’re not sure then why are you bothering me about it

“Hey, do you have a minute/can I ask you a quick question?”

NO

“Hey!”

NO

Read more Wildly Inappropriate Internal Responses I Have Had To Perfectly Innocuous Statements at The Toast.

11 May 23:29

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11 May 23:29

Newswire: CBS picks up CSI: Cyber, promising lots of concerned questions from your grandparents

by Todd VanDerWerff

In what will hopefully, please God, be the last news of this Friday before upfronts week but almost certainly won’t because the fates of Parenthood and Nashville still twist in the wind, CBS has picked up the fourth CSI series, CSI: Cyber to go along with the other four dramas it picked up earlier today. The project follows in the wake of CSI: Crime Scene Investigation, CSI: Miami, and CSI: NY, though only the original is still on the air. It will star Patricia Arquette and focus on cybercrimes, which means that you can probably expect lots of discussion of how Twitter can be used to empty people’s bank accounts or “the dark Internet” the next time you talk to your grandparents. They heard about it on the TV in that show with the nice lady who was on Medium. We just like the title, which sounds like ...

11 May 23:29

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11 May 23:27

Schrödinger versus the morning

by Cory Doctorow
firehose

via multitasksuicide

Nobel-winning physicist Erwin Schrödinger had a complicated relationship with mornings. At times, his sorrow over WWI kept him from getting out of bed; other times he was too hungover. He even reorganized the Planck lectures so that he could deliver them later in the day. But by the 1920s, he was also fond of going to the beach in Zurich in the mornings with a blackboard, and he'd sit in the grass in his bathing trunks and work out equations. Read the rest

11 May 23:25

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11 May 23:25

NFL Draft results 2014: Stanley Jean-Baptiste goes to Saints at No. 58

by Matt Verderame
firehose

decent; nice Saints name in any case

The former Cornhuskers standout hopes to prove doubters wrong at the next level.

With the No. 58 pick in the second round of the 2014 NFL Draft, the New Orleans Saints have selected Nebraska Cornhuskers cornerback Stanley Jean-Baptiste. He is the BLANK corner to be taken in the process. Jean-Baptiste came in at No. 113 on SB Nation's top 200 big board, making him the No. 14 cornerback in this class.

Jean-Baptiste has had quite the journey to the NFL. He originally began his collegiate career at North Carolina Tech Preparatory Christian Academy, spending one season there before transferring into Fort Scott Community College in Kansas, per NFL.com. However, he went a full year without playing football.

In 2010, Jean-Baptiste made his way to Nebraska where he was redshirted as a receiver. In 2011, Jean-Baptiste was converted to a defensive back, playing in nine games and making as many tackles. Over the past two seasons, the 6'3, 218-pound corner played in all 27 games, including earning a start in every 2013 contest. He made four interceptions last season for the Cornhuskers.

Combine results

40-yard dash: 4.61 seconds

Bench: 13 reps

Vertical jump: 41.5 inches

Broad jump: 128 inches

20-yard shuttle: 4.33 seconds