This is one of my favorite posts because that cat’s fucking name is fucking meatloaf
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02 Jun 21:14
This is one of my favorite posts because that cat’s fucking...
allen edward, John and 3 others like this
02 Jun 20:58
Portland Sci-Fi Author Jay Lake Dead at 49
by Alison Hallett
Portlander Jay Lake was a prolific, Campbell Award-winning science fiction writer and editor, the author of ten novels and more than 300 short stories. When diagnosed with colon cancer in 2008, he made his struggle with the illness public, detailing the effects of treatment on his blog; in his final days, the blog was maintained by his partner, Lisa, who reported his passing on Sunday morning. He was 49.
If you'd like to learn more about Lake's life and work, here are two great places to start:
In 2012, the Oregonian ran a terrific profile of Lake, which focuses largely on his cancer diagnosis and treatment. (One highlight: After a round of chemo caused him to lose his hair, he tattooed his scalp with the words "If you can read this, I have cancer again.")
And yesterday, io9's Charlie Jane Anders wrote a moving and thorough appreciation of Lake's writing career:
Through his writing, Lake leaves an enduring legacy, and his impact on science fiction and fantasy will be felt forever. His work as an editor, helping to publish new voices in the field, cannot be underestimated. His wealth of short fiction, and the novels he managed to complete, will be around forever — and a final short fiction collection, The Last Plane To Heaven, comes out this September. He'll be missed, but he'll also be read.
02 Jun 20:24
Programmable LED Firefly Jar – As Seen on Adafruit Show & Tell!
by Matt
Dana Sniezko shared this LED Jar project on the Adafruit Show & Tell last week. Check out the Instructable for how to make it!
This is a fun, beautiful and inexpensive project that makes a great gift! I first started making these over a year ago and my original prototype (and many others) are still running strong.
Building a firefly jar only requires an hour or two of your time, and ever the fan of creative re-use, many of the parts can be recycled from old electronics and things around the house.
To do this project it’s helpful to have some Arduino and soldering experience….
02 Jun 20:24
Grow Vegetables in Any Water Bottle With this Cap Redesign
by Kelly
Fastcoexist published a piece on Petomato, which is a Japanese bottle cap redesign that transforms any water bottle into a mini-planter:
As a gardening-obsessed college student in Japan, Takuya Hasegawa wanted to figure out how to help more people start growing their own food–even if, like many people living in crowded Japanese cities, they didn’t have a yard or much room inside their apartment. He was studying aquaponics, and decided to make the smallest aquaponic garden possible: A system that could grow tomatoes or peppers inside a single water bottle. The Petomato was born.
The kit itself is fairly simple–a regular bottle cap is replaced with a small tube that holds the plant and a fibrous core that draws water inside–but it takes a few more steps than an ordinary garden. You have to follow a regular routine of changing and fertilizing the water, prune the plants so they can fit inside the tiny space, and even hand-pollinate your tomatoes so they can bear fruit.
02 Jun 20:23
Leonardo da Vinci’s resume (1483)
by adafruit
Letters of Note: The Skills of Leonardo da Vinci via Kottke. 1483/84 – 32 years old.
My Most Illustrious Lord,
Having now sufficiently seen and considered the achievements of all those who count themselves masters and artificers of instruments of war, and having noted that the invention and performance of the said instruments is in no way different from that in common usage, I shall endeavour, while intending no discredit to anyone else, to make myself understood to Your Excellency for the purpose of unfolding to you my secrets, and thereafter offering them at your complete disposal, and when the time is right bringing into effective operation all those things which are in part briefly listed below:
1. I have plans for very light, strong and easily portable bridges with which to pursue and, on some occasions, flee the enemy, and others, sturdy and indestructible either by fire or in battle, easy and convenient to lift and place in position. Also means of burning and destroying those of the enemy.
2. I know how, in the course of the siege of a terrain, to remove water from the moats and how to make an infinite number of bridges, mantlets and scaling ladders and other instruments necessary to such an enterprise.
3. Also, if one cannot, when besieging a terrain, proceed by bombardment either because of the height of the glacis or the strength of its situation and location, I have methods for destroying every fortress or other stranglehold unless it has been founded upon a rock or so forth.
4. I have also types of cannon, most convenient and easily portable, with which to hurl small stones almost like a hail-storm; and the smoke from the cannon will instil a great fear in the enemy on account of the grave damage and confusion.
5. Also, I have means of arriving at a designated spot through mines and secret winding passages constructed completely without noise, even if it should be necessary to pass underneath moats or any river.
6. Also, I will make covered vehicles, safe and unassailable, which will penetrate the enemy and their artillery, and there is no host of armed men so great that they would not break through it. And behind these the infantry will be able to follow, quite uninjured and unimpeded.
7. Also, should the need arise, I will make cannon, mortar and light ordnance of very beautiful and functional design that are quite out of the ordinary.
8. Where the use of cannon is impracticable, I will assemble catapults, mangonels, trebuckets and other instruments of wonderful efficiency not in general use. In short, as the variety of circumstances dictate, I will make an infinite number of items for attack and defence.
9. And should a sea battle be occasioned, I have examples of many instruments which are highly suitable either in attack or defence, and craft which will resist the fire of all the heaviest cannon and powder and smoke.
10. In time of peace I believe I can give as complete satisfaction as any other in the field of architecture, and the construction of both public and private buildings, and in conducting water from one place to another.
Also I can execute sculpture in marble, bronze and clay. Likewise in painting, I can do everything possible as well as any other, whosoever he may be.
Moreover, work could be undertaken on the bronze horse which will be to the immortal glory and eternal honour of the auspicious memory of His Lordship your father, and of the illustrious house of Sforza.
And if any of the above-mentioned things seem impossible or impracticable to anyone, I am most readily disposed to demonstrate them in your park or in whatsoever place shall please Your Excellency, to whom I commend myself with all possible humility.
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02 Jun 20:22
gogul-mun: lorilevaughn: kyssthis16: chakotagirl: Frank Waln...
Frank Waln about killed me with this one. #onpoint #wastè
AHHAHAHA, yes!
I heart Frank Waln for real
:o
Russian Sledges, firehose and -1 others like this
02 Jun 20:10
disabilityhistory: These People Used Their Wheelchairs To...
These People Used Their Wheelchairs To Create Incredible Cosplay
Lots more photos at the link!
Image description: Four photos of cosplay, all featuring people in wheelchairs: the oracle, han solo, peewee herman, and queen of hearts.
02 Jun 20:05
First Dwarf Fortress Update In Two Years Arrives Next Month
by Graham Smith
By Graham Smith on June 2nd, 2014 at 12:00 pm.
Dwarf Fortress has long been one of game development’s most interesting blogs, owing to its creators’ propensity for adding absurd amounts of detail to their fantasy world simulator. But for the past two years, none of those updates have actually been available to play. That’s about to change. In this month’s Bay 12 Report, Toady One says that a new update including all those various tweaks and expansions is finally just around the corner.
The time has come! We are planning to release the next version of Dwarf Fortress in the beginning of next month. We are grateful to all those who have contributed time, energy, and money to help us along! Many of you understand how this process works, but the rest need to know how Bay 12 Games operates. Dwarf Fortress is more than a game. It’s a kind of art project that has been in production for over 10 years, and you are part of it! We need everyone to help find bugs, show newbies how to play, and generally spread the word. It will take time for the new version to be as stable as the one that’s out there now. Not to mention all the mods that will have to be re-calibrated. We know that without all the people working and contributing, Dwarf Fortress would be just another failed oddity of a game. But people are getting involved with the project. Everyone is doing their part, answering questions on the forums, contributing to the bug tracker, building great mods, and telling their friends about DF!
I’ve written before about how Dwarf Fortress is deceptively simple to play, and in that regard the new update seems likely to be a double-edged sword. Two years of work will bring all kinds of new additions to the Fortress mode, which are bound to introduce whole new ways to manage your expansion and hasten your own demise. That’s an increase in complexity in a game that’s already difficult to contorl.
The upside is that a large focus of the update is adding to Adventure mode, the more traditionally roguelikey mode which was previously the simplest way to play. It should still be easy to get in and control just a single hero as you explore the game’s generated worlds, but now there should be a lot more to do.
Two years of work means there’s more additions than can be easily listed, but a recent post in the Future of the Fortress thread mentions a few. Townfolk now get angry if you kill relatives they like; armies and guards can now split into sub-units during battles; cowards will try to flee from battle or collapse into sobbing piles; and sweat and tears now evaporate.
DWARF. FORTRESS.
“The tear evaporation is awesome.”
–Thumb Bros, 10/10
__________________
02 Jun 20:05
DevLog Watch: Space Death, Curious Expedition, Firewatch
by Graham Smith
By Graham Smith on June 2nd, 2014 at 1:00 pm.
Patch notes
DevLog Watch v0.0.09
– Fixed recurring bank holiday Monday freeze bug.
– Added games from places other than the TIGSource forum.
– Added game from the TIGSource forum.
– Double-checked games for juvenile hate speech.
– Temporarily cut ‘archive’ section.
– BUG: Intro text gimmicks still need work.
Spaceships! Procedural butterflies! And have you heard about the Firewatch sasquatch?
Space Death
“We’re running a 4th order Runge Kutta simulation for our orbital mechanics.”
*gasp* You monsters!
Space Death is, according to its little blurb, a “game of starship design and the many ways to accidentally kill your crew.” It’s your job to manage both the people and systems aboard your spaceship.
I like the texture of certain sentences, and development logs provide frequent opportunities for rolling words around your mouth like salted toffees. Runge Kutta simulations aren’t designed to discern whether or not you’re a robot, but “are an important family of implicit and explicit iterative methods, which are used in temporal discretization for the approximation of solutions of ordinary differential equations.” Thanks, Wikipedia.
Basically, while other space games worry about aliens or trade, Space Death is more concerned with the innate dangers of space travel: re-entry sequences, rapid decompression, Sandra Bullock’s butterfingers. It’s a little bit Kerbal, a little bit FTL, but it looks more likely to dynamically create Apollo 13 than any other space game I know of.
Which doesn’t mean it’s not science-fiction, or that there won’t be other ships out there in the void.
Encounters with other ships and stations in Space Death range from friendly exchanges and crew hiring through to more challenging moral dilemmas. Often this can result in ship to ship combat, and as all ship are assemblies of two metre square blocks, weapons and lasers will smash through the ships leaving a trail of secondary effects such as fuel leaks…
Its devlog is already 12 pages long and already fascinating: whether for concept art; wise explanations; or pre-vis intro cutscenes.
Time to die. (In space).
The Curious Expedition
Curious Expedition is a roguelike about late 19th century expeditions into uncharted territory. It stars famous figures like Tesla, Darwin, Crowley, and dinosaurs. It also, as of a recent devlog update, includes procedurally generated butterflies.
Darwin would approve.
The butterflies exist so that taxonomy can be part of the game in some capacity, which is just a wonderful thing to be able to write about any videogame.
But the same post also provides a tantalising, too-small glimpse at how they’re keeping the game focused:
After participating in the Ludum Dare game jam we decided to take a step back and strip out everything out that was not directly related to what we considered to be part of the core.
After finding a version that worked how we wanted, we started adding back the features of the “full” version, always in context to the core. This helped a lot, the process is ongoing and we feel that we currently have the best version of the game since we started working on it.
Firewatch
Thus far I’ve mainly used this column to highlight games that haven’t been mentioned elsewhere on RPS, but need it be that way? Firewatch is a first-person game being made by Campo Santo, an indie development team formed by errybody from errything. That pedigree meant that we noticed the game when it was announced.
Just because they’re not total rookies, that doesn’t mean the Firewatch devlog is any less interesting. There’s a recent post about code that I don’t fully understand but enjoyed reading anyway, but really I’m in it for this:
There are a bunch more of these first-person animation tests in this post, and golly I hope there’s more to come. In the meantime I’ll settle for the ranger of other content on the blog, whether concept art from Olly Moss, information (and GIFs) on surface rendering, or a recipe for blueberry pie.
In short
- Folk Tale is in early Early Access, but the devlog for the Settlers-alike is detailed and fun reading.
- I won’t post all of these, but the latest Citybound video update has more on road layouts.
- Ultima Ratio Regum, the 4X roguelike inspired by Borges, continues development. The latest update details city districts and procedurally generated shop signs.
02 Jun 20:04
"Thirstquencher Empire Steam Knight" - Brave Fencer Musashi...
"Thirstquencher Empire Steam Knight" -
Brave Fencer Musashi (Square - PSX - 1998)
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02 Jun 20:02
Protestors oppose repayment of 38 Studios bond
by Alexa Ray Corriea
Last Thursday, a small group of protestors gathered outside the Rhode Island State House to express opposition to the repayment of the state's $75 million bond given now-defunct 38 Studios, reports The Providence Journal.
The group included several local political figures — including second-time Democratic governor candidate Todd Giroux and CEO of the Republican Party's Center for Freedom and Prosperity Mike Stenhous — as well as a handful of members of the R.I. Tea Party, Green Party and Occupy Providence.
“This former Red Sox player doesn’t think that we, the taxpayers, should be on the hook for the dealings of another former Red Sox player,” Stenhouse said.
“By not paying this bond we will send a statement that these insider, special deals will not be tolerated any more in our state," he added.
Randall Rose of Occupy Providence said during the protest that “it doesn’t matter” if the state's bond rating is cut because “smart investors know the [bond rating] agencies can’t be trusted at all.” However, House Speaker Nicholas Mattiello argued that the state can't take this risk, noting that the state needs to pay investors to avoid further serious financial issues — such as the downgrade to "junk bond status" for R.I.'s current and future bonds.
“The 38 Studio bonds were not approved by R.I. voters," said former state General Treasurer Frank Caprio, who does not think the bonds should be repaid. "The sophisticated investors who made the loan are multi-billion-dollar companies who understood the risks and have bought insurance to protect their investment.”
Caprio has recommended the state “begin discussions with the rating agencies and the others who hold and insure the bonds." But Department of Administration director Richard Licht recenlty told the House Finance Committee that negotiations for a settlement with bond holders have gotten nowhere. According to Licht, he and R.I's budget and management office director Peter Marino met with the bond insurer both last and this year; the insurer "had no interest in negotiating anything prior to a default.” Licht also said that USAA, the largest bondholder, has no interest in discussing a settlement.
Last year's bond payment — which was paid for with state funds — was $2.4 million, while this year's is substantially higher, $12.3 million. Ernest Almonte, the legislature's former auditor general, said that there is no guarantee lawmakers will approve this next payment to the bond holders, which could move the state to push harder for a settlement between now and the end of the state's budget discussions 30 days from now.
Last month, the Rhode Island Libertarian Party urged the state to not repay the 38 Studios loan, with party chairman Mike Rollins stating the "so-called 'moral obligation' bonds are neither moral, nor a legitimate financial obligation." Just last week, the Greater Providence Chamber of Commerce wrote an open letter urging citizens to push lawmakers to repay the loan.
Follow the full story of 38 Studios' collapse in our dedicated StoryStream.
firehose likes this
02 Jun 20:02
Mario Kart 8 tops 1.2M, fastest selling Wii U game
by Megan Farokhmanesh
Mario Kart 8, the latest entry in Nintendo's kart racing franchise, is the fastest selling Wii U game in the console's history, the company announced today.
The game has sold more than 1.2 million copies worldwide since its release May 29 in Japan and May 30 in North America and Europe. Mario Kart 8 is also pulling in the "strongest review scores in franchise history."
"The early response to Mario Kart 8 demonstrates that the best days for Wii U are still ahead," Reggie Fils-Aime, Nintendo of America president and COO, said. "This year's E3 is just days away, and it will be all about the future games for Nintendo platforms."
For more on Mario Kart 8, check out our review.
Despite the game's rapid sales, the game is still likely to be the worst-selling title in the franchise's history. For a complete breakdown, check out our analysis piece on Mario Kart.
02 Jun 18:50
Apple HealthKit announced: a hub for all your iOS fitness tracking needs
by Chris Welch
firehoseWELPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP
Apple just unveiled HealthKit, a new app bundled with iOS 8 that's designed to help users keep better track of their personal health and fitness data. HealthKit provides an easy-to-access hub where iPhone owners can monitor important health metrics on a daily basis, while also stepping back to examine their fitness trends over a longer period of time. But simply calling HealthKit an "app" may be underselling it somewhat. Health apps have proven tremendously popular with consumers, and this represents Apple's attempt to seize that market — at least among iOS users. It's also been speculated that HealthKit will work in tandem with the fabled (and still unannounced) iWatch.
Until now, Apple has shied away from making its own fitness software. Instead, the company has for years provided a mobile platform — iOS — that's allowed companies like Fitbit, Jawbone, Nike, RunKeeper, and MapMyFitness to showcase their apps. It's also made strides to improve the iPhone as a fitness tool by adding specialized hardware like last year's M7 coprocessor.
Apple is making its own health push
But apparently Apple has decided that it's time to jump in with iOS 8 and Healthkit. At the very least, that decision is likely based off of strong data. Apple sells devices like the Jawbone Up24, Fitbit Flex, and Nike Fuelband in its own retail stores; the company is perfectly aware of how popular they've become.
9to5Mac first broke word that Apple was preparing its own push into fitness tracking earlier this year. Soon after, the site published "recreated" screenshots revealing "Healthbook." Those reports, which came months ahead of today's WWDC keynote, effectively spoiled one of the major additions to iOS 8 — and there aren't many. The upcoming software update is largely an iterative progression of the brand new user interface and design style that Apple introduced with iOS 7 last year.
Developing. Check out our Apple WWDC Live Blog for the latest updates!
02 Jun 18:45
Oliver Stone set to direct an Edward Snowden biopic
by Adi Robertson
Sony's film about whistleblower Edward Snowden may have competition. According to The Guardian, Oliver Stone is set to direct an adaptation of The Snowden Files, an account of the former NSA contractor's theft and release of documents revealing far-reaching government surveillance programs. The film is supposed to start shooting by the end of 2014 and will be produced by Moritz Borman, who has previously worked with Stone. Snowden Files author and Guardian correspondent Luke Harding, as well as other Guardian journalists, will be brought on as consultants. Earlier this spring, Glenn Greenwald's book No Place to Hide was optioned by Sony Pictures, with James Bond franchise producers Michael G. Wilson and Barbara Broccoli on board.
Stone's career has seen him direct films about, among other things, the assassination of John F. Kennedy (JFK), the presidency and resignation of Richard Nixon (Nixon), the Vietnam War (Born on the Fourth of July and Platoon), and the September 11th attacks (World Trade Center). He's previously praised Edward Snowden, calling him a "hero" and President Barack Obama's hunt for him a "disgrace." In a statement today, he called Snowden's tale "one of the greatest stories of our time." Previously, he has expressed admiration for WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange and criticized the treatment of whistleblower Chelsea (then Bradley) Manning.
Luke Harding's relationship is more complicated. In 2011, Harding co-authored WikiLeaks: Inside Julian Assange's War on Secrecy, one of two books that provided source material for mediocre WikiLeaks movie The Fifth Estate. Even before the film's production, Assange had threatened to sue Harding for libel after he printed what Assange called a "completely fabricated" claim. Both Assange and Snowden worked with The Guardian, among other outlets, to publish stories based on their leaked documents.
- Source The Guardian
- Related Items edward snowden oliver stone film movie whistleblower
02 Jun 18:32
Photo
firehosevia Gussian Nledges ("("forever reshare.")")
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02 Jun 18:23
travelry: Today I went to the cup noodle factory (& museum)...
Today I went to the cup noodle factory (& museum) in Osaka, Japan. It’s quite far out of the city, but after I read that you get to make your own cup noodle for 300¥ (£1.70/$2.90), I just had to go there. You go through the whole process of decorating a cup, adding the dry noodles, soup powder & your choice of 4 dry ingredients (I did pork, onion, garlic & narutomaki/decorative chicks). Then the cup is all sealed up (you even get to operate the machine to seal and fill it) and you pop it into an inflatable bubble bag with a red cord to take home with you!
firehose and -1 others like this
02 Jun 18:22
acquaintedwithrask: "Community has pulled off one the most...
"Community has pulled off one the most patient easter egg: in one episode of each of the first three seasons, the word "Beetlejuice" was used off-handedly in a joke. If you’ve seen the movie Beetlejuice, the titular mischievous ghost would appear in the world of the living if anyone said his name three times. So, sure enough, on the third mention by a Community character, this guy appears in the background for exactly two seconds. They patiently waited three years to reach that punchline."community operates on a level we mere mortals have yet to understand
firehose and -1 others like this
02 Jun 18:22
centralist: This is the best gif of all time
Tertiarymatt, firehose and -1 others like this
02 Jun 12:25
wkdart: Someone’s taking animal crossing a little too...
firehose and -1 others like this
02 Jun 06:51
Here's What Apple's iBeacon Really Is And Why It's Going To Change Everything
firehose'people will have access to information, deals, videos, and electronic coupons that are relevant to their specific interests, all in real time. No more coupons from retailers that don’t apply to their needs.
Businesses and retailers will be impacted by the fact that they will now have a direct line to their customers, drawing them to their location, as well as enticing them to buy additional items while still in the store. iBeacon will allow businesses to attach digital content to everything in the physical store.
...
Join Hubspot's CMO, VentureBeat's VP of Product, and more for our upcoming webinar: "Enterprise software and the CMO, CTO, CIO -- Who does what, who gets the cash, and who’s in charge?" Sign up for free!'
Using Bluetooth to send ads between nearby devices sounds both boring and annoying. But that’s exactly what Apple’s iBeacon does — and Apple’s not in the boring-and-annoying business.
02 Jun 04:35
The Weird Google Searches Of The Unemployed And What They Say About The Economy
If you really want to know how the economy is doing now, just Google it.
02 Jun 04:33
Pixar's Renderman Software Is Now Free. Go Make Your Own 'Toy Story'
Between Autodesk offering students a free download of Maya and the new Renderman v19 being completely free, young amateur animation enthusiasts have access to two of the tools that power some of the highest-grossing animated features in the history of cinema.
Tertiarymatt likes this
02 Jun 03:00
Timbers vs. Vancouver Whitecaps—High-Pitched Live Blog Action!
by Brian Gjurgevich
firehosefuck this whole season
LIVE from Goose Hollow, where after slow-dancing toward disaster for much of the first two months of the season, the Timbers are suddenly struttin'.
Unbeaten in six straight and fresh off back-to-back road wins this very week, Portland's confidence—as coach Caleb Porter put it Friday—is at an "all-time high."
Good thing, especially since the similarly warming Vancouver Whitecaps enter tonight's regional romp looking to do more than step on the toes of their Cascadia neighbors. The holders of The Cup are unbeaten in five straight and need a result to keep Portland below them in the Western Conference standings.
It's a lovely day night for a derby! So kick off those boots, click past the jump and follow along as I deftly describe all the rug-cutting action—on and off the pitch.
LINEUPS
Vancouver's First XI—(4-2-5, 17 points)—David Ousted in goal. Nigel Reo-Coker, Jay DeMerit, Andy O'Brien and Jordan Harvey on defense. Matias Laba, Pedro Morales, Gershon Koffie, Sebastian Fernández and Kekuta Manneh at midfield. Erik Hurtado up front.
Available: Paolo Tornaghi, Darren Mattocks, Johnny Leverón, Omar Salgado, Christian Dean, Nicolas Mezquida, Russell Teibert.
Portland's First XI—(3-3-7, 16 points)—Donovan Ricketts in goal. Jack Jewsbury, Pa Kah, Raushawn McKenzie and Jorge Villafaña on defense. Diego Chara, Diego Valeri, Capt. Will Johnson and Darlington Nagbe at midfield. Maxi Urruti and Steve Zakuani up front.
Riding pine: Andrew Weber, Michael Harrington, Danny O'Rourke, Kalif Alhassan, Michael Nanchoff, Fanendo Adi, Gaston Fernandez.
Urruti gets the start over Adi, in Porter's biggest good-problem-to-have of the week. Both strikers are hot, coming off two-goal performances. Harrington remains on the bench after Villafana performed well in Harrington's injury absence. No Futty in the 18.
PREGAME
It sounds like a derby in here. The Southsiders have made the trip South, and are making their presence known. They also did quite a number to the sidewalk in front of the visiting supporters/media entrance. But since they're Canadian, the vandalism was all chalk-based. Rumor has it, however, the Southsiders had a chant about Portland needing to boil its water earlier, which is both funny and #toosoon, brahs.
Timbers are sporting their Rose City red kits, 'Caps are in all white. Just over half the pitch covered in sun, the rest is in the shadow of this here press box.
In the absence of tifo, lots of new green-and-gold checked flags in the North End for this one.
FIRST HALF: Timbers headed South...and away we go!
2nd minute—First nifty backheel of the night goes the Timbers. It leads to nothing, but nifty nonetheless.
3rd—TIMBERS GOAL! Urruti with a beautiful strike. Nagbe feeds one to Valeri, who finds Urruti. He runs to the end of the box and crushes one left-footed, curling around Ousted. Urruti is officially on fire, and there's green and yellow smoke to prove it. Timbers lead 1-0.
6th—Villafana called for a foul, the first of the match. He dragged down Fernandez on a potential counter.
7th—Nearly a second goal for Portland, but OUSTED WITH A DIVING SAVE. Nagbe dancing around the box and feeds it back to Johnson, who hits one low and left. Ousted dives and knocks it away. Nagbe still down in the box as Vancouver is called for a foul in a dangerous spot, about five yards outside the box.
8th—Nagbe back on his feet and Valeri sends in the free kick low. No troubles for the Vancouver defense.
11th—Johnson with a big switch to Jewsbury, who touches it back to Valeri. He moves around a defender and has a shot from 15 yards out, but it's not caught well and dribbles to Ousted. Goal kick, Vancouver.
13th—Zakuani dribbles into the box and finds Nagbe, who chips it ahead to Urruti. He tries a shot, but nothing much on that one and Ousted easily handles it. Nice one-touch passing there from Portland, whose offensive attack is exhibiting a lot of confidence right now.
15th—VANCOUVER PENALTY KICK! Hurtado dribbles into the box and either Chara or Jewsbury make contact. Hurtado goes down and the ref immediately points to the spot. Tough call, look pretty innocuous from up here. Of course, if Hurtado was going for the call from the jump, that was well done. Kah and Johnson motioning for Timbers Army to get louder as Morales lines it up.
16th—CAPS GOAL! Morales goes right up the middle and equalizes. He taunts Timbers Army a bit, and they won't like that. We're tied at 1.
18th—Nagbe with a long run until he's taken down by Harvey. No call, and Johnson is furious with the ref. Right back on the south end and Nagbe hammers a volley that goes off a Vancouver defender and over the line for a corner kick.
19th—Valeri sends in a curler and URRUTI HITS THE POST. He nearly scores a second one on a deft header. The rebound goes to McKenzie, but he ends up at a tough angle and doesn't attempt a shot.
24th—Zakuani sends a cross into the box that caught Ousted a bit off guard. It was probably meant to be a cross, but it fluttered its way dangerously close to the top right corner. No matter, goal kick for Vancouver.
25th—PENALTY KICK VANCOUVER. Seriously. Villafana called for a foul inside the box and the ref again points to the spot. Yeeesh, another close call in the box leads to the second PK of the match. Cue the conspiracy theorists.
26th—VANCOUVER GOAL! Morales goes left and Ricketts has no chance. Caps lead 2-1.
28th—Manneh called for the first yellow of the match. Chara had just stolen the ball from him and he returned the favor with a sliding tackle from behind. Free kick for Portland, but it's all the way back in their end. This one's been wide open so far, and now it's getting a bit chippy.
30th—Manneh fires one from about 40 yards out, but it's well high and wide.
31st—Valeri is taken down from behind in the box and no call. Fans are livid. Porter is livid. Tough no-call.
37th—A near-disaster for Kah, who's dispossessed by Hurtado after taking a backward pass from Nagbe and trying to do too way much. Not sure what he was thinking there, dribbling into a double team. Hurtado finds Morales, who settles and curls one just wide of the goal. That would've been a dagger right there.
40th—Zakuani works his way around Reo-Coker after a nice touch on a driven ball by Chara. Zakuani attempts a cross, but well defended by the Caps.
43rd—Caps nearly net one, but it's just over the bar! Morales with a corner kick and Hurtado sticks his foot out and nearly jabs one in. But it catches the bottom of his boot and goes just over the bar.
44th—Things are getting chippy at midfield. Fernandez gets a yellow card for delaying. Chara took issue and Kah ran up and bodied him to the ground. There's a bit of a scrum at midfield, but it's broken up. Porter and Robinson are jawing at each other from their respective coach's boxes.
Four minutes of stoppage...Valeri fires one off the side netting! Quickly on the corner kick, and Valeri sends it in low, but it's knocked away immediately....Another Timbers corner sent into the middle and McKenzie gets a header on it, but it's popped into the air and easy pickings for Ousted. WHITECAPS GOAL! Hurtado! Nice combo play there as Hurtado gets the cross and one-times a shot that's saved by Ricketts. The rebound falls right to Hurtado's feet, however, and he either knocks it in easily or it just spins over the line. In any case, Vancouver leads 3-1.
HALFTIME: That was certainly an interesting first 45 minutes. 'Caps lead 3-1 and the refs are hearing it from Timbers Army as they exit the pitch. Hearing boos, that is. Some of those might be reserved for the Timbers back line, which has been just as, uh, questionable as the officials.
Some stats: Vancouver out-shot Portland 14-6. Portland had 55% of the possession and won nearly 56% of duels.
SECOND HALF: Timbers headed toward their Army.
46th—One sub for Vancouver: Teibert is on for Manneh. Timbers will have the first corner of the half. Valeri sends it in, but it's right at Ousted, who leaps and grabs it without issue.
48th—Villafana with yet another well-paced ball into the box. This one's for Zakuani, who gets past Reo-Coker and knocks one left-footed, but well wide of the goal.
49th—WHITECAPS GOAL! What a strike from Harvey! Patient buildup from Vancouver leads to a killer of a goal. Morales bring it down and gets way too much time in the corner of the box. He finds Hurtado, who plays it back to Harvey. After a nice first touch, he blasts it low and right, and Ricketts can't reach it. Vancouver leads 4-1.
51st—Zakuani collides with Ousted after a heavy first touch, and the Caps keeper is still down.
54th—Valeri sends a low, line-driven cross into the box for Urruti, but Ousted is there to grab it first.
56th—Morales fires one from 40 yards out and Ricketts knocks it over the line. Corner coming. Timbers make their first sub: Adi comes on for Zakuani. Two strikers up front, dice being rolled down three goals.
57th—Morales' cross comes low and it's headed over the line by a Vancouver player. Goal kick coming.
61st—Great ball by Morales ahead to Hurtado, who had the defense beat until McKenzie catches up and knocks it over the line. Nice recovery after Morales' 50-yard longball nearly freed up Hurtado for a goal. Corner kick coming. Morales takes it low and near-post. Harvey with a diving header over the line. No troubles there for Ricketts, who will have a goal kick.
66th—Subs! For Vancouver, it's Mattocks for Hurtado. For Portland, Fernandez comes on for Urruti.
70th—Timbers nearly net one! Jewsbury with a long cross that skips to the other side of the box for Valeri. Instead of one-touching, he gathers and shoots, but it hits the side of the net. Valeri would probably like that one back. Big-time missed opportunity there.
72nd—Chara finds Nagbe, who runs to the top of the box and fires, but his shot is wide left. Two decent opportunities in a row for Portland, which is picking up momentum but perhaps too late.
77th—Villafana with a cross for Adi, who nearly volleys it in! It'll be a corner kick, but not before Alhassan comes on for Villafana. Corner comes in low and immediately cleared.
78th—TIMBERS GOAL! Fernandez pulls one back. Valeri plays a great ball into six-yard box and Fernandez strongly heads it across Ousted for goal. CAPS STILL LEAD, 4-2.
81st—Alhassan earns a corner. Johnson plays it quick and Alhassan dummies it for Nagbe, but Vancouver defends.
83rd—Mattocks steps into the box and fires low, but Ricketts is there to grab it.
84th—Nagbe sets up a free kick after being fouled about 25 yards out. Valeri with the quick restart. He plays it in for Adi at the penalty spot, but Ousted with the save! Big-time save there for the Caps as the Timbers keep threatening.
86th—TIMBERS GOAL! And what a goal! A long ball played into the box for Adi, who chests it down, touches it to himself twice, then pops it for Johnson. He's running full-stride into the box and absolutely blasts a volley past Ousted. Wow, what a great goal. CAPS LEAD 4-3, but this one is far from over.
88th—Free kick coming about 25 yards out. Koffie fouled Johnson and is livid about the call. Johnson readies in front of the wall. He fires it low, but it's just wide left.
Four minutes of stoppage...And we'll have a corner for Portland after Fernandez just misses the equalizer. Valeri sends it in and McKenzie gets a clean header, but IT'S WIDE!...Another free kick for Portland. They play it short. Nagbe into the box and he's dragged down by Mattocks, but no call. Shouldn't be, probably. Vancouver clears and Ricketts comes way out of his box. And now he's walking with a heavy limp....One more chance for Portland. Alhassan fouled about 10 yards outside of the edge of the box. Meanwhile, on the other end, Ricketts is down. Valeri pops the free kick high and into the six-yard box, but Ousted is there go grab it.
FULL TIME: Whitecaps win, 4-3. A crazy final 20 minutes sees Portland score twice and nearly equalize, but Vancouver beats Portland for the first time in each team's MLS history. Ricketts still down in the box. Refs are walking off and hearing it from the fans and Merritt Paulson. He berates the refs as they walk off the field. He looks very, shall we say, animated, as the refs take the starewell down to their locker room. First some sarcastic applause, then just some straight yellin'. Not the classiest move I've ever seen...And speaking of, now coaches are mixing it up at midfield, with Porter and Robinson right in the middle of it. Both are quickly separated from the scrum, but lots of words still being exchanged by a number of players. Ugh.
Porter's postgame presser...and yeah, it's pretty testy: