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23 Aug 21:14

Miracleman: ¿de verdad era para tanto?

by Eme A

miracleman 1

Es difícil separar Miracleman, el tebeo, de sus circunstancias; de todos esos líos y juicios que ha habido con los derechos del personaje y sus historias y que han impedido su reedición durante casi tres décadas, y cuyo último coletazo es que ni Marvel en EEUU ni Panini en España puedan usar el nombre del guionista original en esta edición (pero como en GenCómics podemos, recuerdo por si hay algún despistado que se trata de Alan Moore). ¿De verdad han merecido la pena todos los años de enfrentamientos y juicios para reeditar esta serie?

La respuesta es sí. Incluso dejando aparte toda la mitificación que ha ido ganando a lo largo de los años Miracleman es un buen tebeo, más cercano a la cifi británica estilo 2000AD que a los superhéroes estadounidenses. Muchos de sus hallazgos han sido asumidos por la industria superheroica, pero la historia sigue ahí. Sería un error acercarse a este tomo con interés arqueológico (o peor, de rodillas) cuando lo importante es que los tebeos se disfrutan. Y con Miracleman disfrutas como un gorrino en un maizal

La edición de Panini es fiel a la de Marvel, y por tanto comparte características como el nuevo coloreado y la ausencia de censura (en un principio se pensó que sí habría porque lo primero que se filtró fue una versión recortada exclusiva para la venta en la muy restrictiva Apple Store). Lo más discutible sin duda de este primer tomo (y todo indica que los siguientes seguirán el mismo camino) es que un tercio de las páginas contienen material extra (bocetos, portadas alternativas, artículos…), cuando al lector lo que le importa de verdad son las páginas de historieta. Han querido hacer una edición tan “especial” que se les ha ido la mano

miracleman 1Miracleman 1: El sueño de volar
Alan Moore, Mick Anglo, Don Lawrence, Garry Leach, Alan Davis y Steve Dillon
Contiene Miracleman 1-4 USA
Panini Cómics España. Libro en tapa dura. 176 páginas, 17.95€

¡Kimota! Al pronunciar una palabra mágica, una leyenda largo tiempo olvidada vive de nuevo. El periodista Michael Moran siempre supo que estaba destinado a la grandeza. Ahora, una serie de acontecimientos inesperados le lleva a reclamar su destino como Miracleman. El cómic que encabezó una revolución literaria comienza aquí, con “El sueño de volar”. Después de cerca de dos décadas desaparecido, Miracleman descubre sus verdaderos orígenes y su conexión con el llamado Proyecto Zarathustra, mientras su alter ego, Michael Moran, debe conciliar su vida como un simple humano con la existencia de un dios.

 

El artículo Miracleman: ¿de verdad era para tanto? apareció primero en GenComics.

23 Aug 20:37

Clouded Leopard Cubs Show Mad Skills

by Andrew Bleiman

Clouded Leopard_8

The Clouded Leopard cubs, born at Houston Zoo on June 6, are growing and developing their big cat skills. So far, the pair has mastered the art of being adorable!

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Clouded leopard_6Photo Credits: Houson Zoo/Stephanie Adams

The cubs are a result of the first pregnancy for two-year-old Suksn, who gave birth in a private den off-exhibit.  A few hours after their birth, in June, the cubs were moved to the veterinary clinic to begin receiving 24-hour care by the zoological team at Houston Zoo.

The birth is not only the first birth for Suksn, but also the first Clouded Leopard birth for the Houston Zoo.  This is also the first offspring for the cubs’ father, Tarak, also two years old.  Suksn and Tarak have been residents of the Houston Zoo since 2012.

Clouded Leopards are classified as ‘vulnerable’ on the IUCN Red List, due to deforestation and hunting.  Since this animal is so rare, it is important to do everything possible to ensure the health and well-being of every Clouded Leopard born in captivity. The common practice among zoos is to hand-raise all newborn Clouded Leopards. 

See more photos below.

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23 Aug 20:37

ONE HIT WONDERLAND: “Hooked on a Feeling” by Blue Swede

by admin

Ooga chaka ooga chaka ooga ooga ooga chaka.

23 Aug 20:31

John Oliver Covers the Militarization of Ferguson Police and Beyond

by Megh Wright
by Megh Wright

Considering both The Daily Show and The Colbert Report were off the air last week, John Oliver's Last Week Tonight segment on the tragic shooting of Michael Brown by Ferguson cops — as well as the ridiculous level of American police militarization in Ferguson and beyond — was a much needed dose of sane coverage last night: "The point is, if you are a cop in the United States, you should dress for the job you have, not the job you want."

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23 Aug 20:24

Rollin’ Bones: The History of Dice

by Miss Cellania

The following is reprinted from the book Uncle John's Unsinkable Bathroom Reader.

The next time you find yourself rolling a pair of dice, know that you’re tapping into something primordial- keeping alive an ancient tradition that began long before recorded history.

DEM BONES

(Image credit: Vassil)

Archaeologists can’t pinpoint the first human who threw dice, but they do know this: Unlike many customs that started in one place and then spread, dice-throwing appeared independently all across the populated world. The oldest known dice -dating back at least 8,000 years- consisted of found objects such as fruit pits, pebbles, and seashells. But the direct precursors of today’s dice were bone: the ankle bones of hoofed animals, such as sheep and oxen. These bones -later called astragali by the  Greeks- were chosen because they are roughly cube-shaped, with two rounded sides that couldn’t be landed on, and four flat ones that could. Which side would be facing up after a toss, or a series of tosses, was as much a gamble to our ancestors as it is to us today.

The first dice throwers weren’t gamers, though -they were religious shamans who used astragali (as well as sticks, rocks, or even animal entrails) for divination, the practice of telling the future by interpreting signs from the gods. How did these early dice make their way from the shaman to the layman? According to David Schwartz in Roll the Bones: The History of Gambling:

The line between divination and gambling is blurred. One hunter, for example, might say to another, “If the bones land short side up, we will search for game to the south; if not, we look north,” thus using the astragali to plumb the future. But after the hunt, the hunters might cast bones to determine who would go home with the most desirable cuts.

SQUARING OFF

And with that, gambling -and dice gaming- was born, leading to the next big step in dice evolution. Around 7,000 years ago, ancient Mesopotamians carved down the rounded sides of the astragali to make them even more cube-like. Now they could land on one of six sides, allowing the outcome to become more complex. As their technology advanced, materials such as ivory, wood, and whalebone were used to make dice. (Image credit: Swiss Museum of Games)

It is believed that the shamans were the first ones to make marks on the sides of the dice, but it didn’t take long for them to roll into the rest of society. Dice first appeared in board games in Ur, a city in southern Mesopotamia. Now referred to as the “Royal Game of Ur,” this early version of backgammon (circa 3,000 BC) used four-sided, pyramidal dice.

However, the most common dice, then and now, are six-sided cubic hexahedrons with little dots, or pips, to denote their values. The pip pattern still in use today -one opposite six, two opposite five, and three opposite four- first appeared in Mesopotamia circa 1300 BC, centuries before the introduction of Arabic numerals.

WHEN IN ROME



In the first millennium BC, civilizations thrived in Greece, India, and China- and they all threw dice.  In Rome, it was common for gamblers to call out the goddess Fortuna’s name while rolling a 20-sided die during a game of chance. But they had to do it quietly -dice games were illegal in Rome (except during the winter solstice festival of Saturnalia). Not that that stopped anyone from playing it: One surviving fresco depicts two quarreling dicers being thrown out of a public house by the proprietor.

* When General Julius Caesar led his army across the Rubicon River to attack Rome in 49 BC -which set in motion his rise to power- he knew that there was no turning back, proclaiming, ”Lea iacta est.” Translation: “The die is cast.”

* Later Roman leaders were also dice aficionados, including Mark Antony, Caligula (he was notorious for cheating), Claudius, Nero, and Commodus, who built special dicing rooms in his palace.

ROLLING ALONG



After the fall of the Roman Empire, many of civilization’s advancements and inventions fell out of use. Not dice, though- their use continued through the Middle Ages, being one of the few leisure activities affordable to peasants. In the rest of the world, dice played an important role among the tribes and indigenous peoples of Africa and the Americas, for both recreation and divination. And in 12th-century China, a variation of a dice game led to the introduction of dominoes, which are basically flattened-out dice.

But it was in Medieval Europe that the popularity of dice game soared, starting in the 1100s with a game called Hazard that was played by both aristocrats and commoners. “They dance and play at dice both day and night,” wrote Chaucer in The Canterbury Tales. These games were so popular that over the ensuing centuries dice guilds and schools formed all over western Europe. That didn’t stop the Catholic Church from attempting to ban all gambling games, though. Over the next few hundred years, dozens of popes, bishops, and priests instituted bans against dicing games. And just like in ancient Rome, the bans didn’t stop people from playing them.

(Image credit: Jack ma)

A CRAPPY ORIGIN

It was inevitable then, that dice traveled aboard the ships emigrating to the New World (the religious Pilgrims on the Mayflower were none too fond of the crew’s gambling games). In colonial America, the game of Hazard was introduce by the French in New Orleans, who called it crapaud, meaning “toad.” The game became popular with slaves, who shortened the name to craps, which is still the most popular gambling dice game in the the United States. And in the early 20th century, board games like Monopoly became popular, guaranteeing that nearly every American home would have at least one set of dice.




PAIR OF DICE LOST

Where there is gaming, there is cheating. While ancient civilizations may have believed the gods were responsible for the outcome of the roll, many unscrupulous players felt the need to give the gods a little help. Loaded dice -as well as dice with the corners shaved off- were found in the ruins of Pompeii. When wooden dice were common, enterprising gamblers would grow small trees around pebbles; then they’d carve the dice with the weight inside, leaving no visible marks.

Modern cheaters are just as crafty in their methods. One type of trick dice are trappers: Drops of mercury are loaded into a center reservoir; by holding the die a certain way and tapping it against a table, the mercury travels down a tunnel to another reservoir, subtly weighting the die. Another trick is to fill a die with wax that melts at just below body temperature: Held in a closed fist, the wax melts, settling to the desired side.

Today casinos spend millions trying to thwart cheaters in a high tech war of wits using extremely sensitive equipment to detect even the slightest alteration in a pair of suspect dice. And to keep people from bringing their own dice to the craps table, all casino dice have tiny serial numbers. A more radical way of stoping cheaters: virtual dice rolled by a computer. This not only makes loading dice impossible, but also allows craps players to “roll the bones” from the keypad of a cell phone. But nothing can replace the actual feeling of shaking the dice in your hands and letting them fly.

DICEY VARIATIONS

(Image credit: Zocchihedron Man)

Dice made from the ankles of sheep are still used in Mongolia today. And they’re just one type of thousands that exist. Have you ever rolled a 30-sided die -the highest number symmetrical polyhedron? Or how about the 100-sided die, called the Zocchihedron (invented in the 1980s by a gamer named Lou Zocchi)? There’s also the no-sided die -a sphere with a moving internal weight that causes the sphere to stop rolling with one of its six numbers facing up. There are barrel dice (roughly cylindrical, with flat surfaces), letter dice (like in the game Boggle), playing card dice (often called “poker dice”), six-siders numbered zero through five, three-sided dice, doubling cubes (such as those used in backgammon), asymmetrical polyhedrons, and countless others.

And those are just the varieties used in gaming. Myriad other dice are used in cleromancy, the ancient practice of divining with dice. Tibetan Buddhists use a set of three dice made from conch shells to help make daily decisions. Astrologers use a set of 12-sided dice relating to the Zodiac signs. There are I Ching dice with trigrams and yin/yang symbols. And if you’ve ever shaken a Magic 8-Ball and asked it a question, you’ve practiced cleromancy: The responses -“Yes,” “No,” “Ask again,” “Later, “ etc.- are printed on a 20-sided icosahedron.

(Image credit: Moroboshi)

Though rarely used in games since the Roman Empire, noncubical dice have made a resurgence in the past few decades. They were used for teaching arithmetic before they took hold of the world of gaming by storm, most notably in the role-playing game Dungeons & Dragons.

____________________________

The article above is reprinted with permission from Uncle John's Unsinkable Bathroom Reader. The Bathroom Readers' Institute has sailed the seas of science, history, pop culture, humor, and more to bring you Uncle John's Unsinkable Bathroom Reader. Our all-new 21st edition is overflowing with over 500 pages of material that is sure to keep you fully absorbed.

Since 1988, the Bathroom Reader Institute has published a series of popular books containing irresistible bits of trivia and obscure yet fascinating facts. Check out their website here: Bathroom Reader Institute.

23 Aug 20:03

They finally caught ‘the Penis Collector’ in Serbia

by Brian Abrams
They finally caught ‘the Penis Collector’ in Serbia

Huzzah! Eastern Europe can once again rest easy.

With exception for all the other heinous stuff going on in that region, police finally busted the “penis collector,” a 52-year-old man in Slavonski Brod who kept dead dongs in jars with formalin inside his apartment.

Questions are still unanswered as to whether the penises belonged to corpses or if grown men are walking the Serbian streets with stumps and nubs inside of their shorts.

The “Collector,” who was not named in the police report, is currently being investigated for his deranged hobby. There is no word yet on charges–whether homicide or simply a series of burglaries of morgues and medical centers.

The suspect has no criminal record and is considered “a family man.” Which should not come as a surprise. Even Clark Griswold had a dark side.

h/t @_Cooper/image via

23 Aug 19:41

Things You Only Know When Your Parents Are Dead

by Joel Golby

Joel and his mother.

Both my parents are hella dead. When I was 15 my dad died and I got six weeks off school. Last year my mom died and I got two weeks off work. Two weeks! Paid leave! On top of my annual vacation time! If my last remaining parent hadn't just died in semi-tragic circumstances, I would've been like: Damn, this is like winning the lottery.

Instead I spent a two weeks shaking hands with funeral directors and going to council buildings and filling out forms. Because here's the thing people tell you about both your parents dying: nothing. They tell you nothing. And there is loads of stuff to deal with. For example: What monetary value do you put on the gift you send to the neighbor who has a really faraway look in their eyes because they found your mother's corpse? I sent her a $85 beer basket. Is that appropriate? Is that too much? I don't know and neither does anyone else.

So, here's some stuff I've picked up after a year of being an orphan.

LOOKING AT THE CORPSES OF THE PEOPLE WHO MADE YOU IS QUITE WEIRD
Funeral directors have a lot of things to deal with—liquids, cavities, flicking through an eight-page pamphlet of somber flower arrangements and pretending any of it matters... But what I've noticed they have the most trouble with is making the corpses of your parents look like your actual parents.

Obviously, dead people look way different than living people. That is science. But what is the point of having a long conversation about how your dad wore his hair ("He combed it with a wet comb maybe once a decade?") or giving them a freezer bag full of your mom's actual makeup if they're just going to rouge and preen them up so they look like they were two casualties in an especially competitive drag queen dance battle?

Illustrations by James Burgess

YOU HAVE A LOAD OF CRAP YOU DON'T NEED
You never really think about how much crap you have in your mom’s house until you are forced to sit cross-legged on the floor sorting through it in those boring days between her death and her funeral. Here are just some of the things I found: a box of 95/96 Panini stickers, mainly of Paul McGrath; some shells from a vacation I don’t remember; a Dreamcast, a console that has not been played by a human being since about 1999; some binoculars with a swastika on them; and about a million pages torn out of the Times’ Saturday supplement with recipes printed on them. You are never going to make Mizeria. Throw all the non-Nazi stuff in the bin and start over.

YOU GET WAY FEWER DRINKS BOUGHT FOR YOU THAN YOU'D THINK JUST FOR TELLING PEOPLE YOU ARE AN ORPHAN
I've had like two drinks by virtue of my parents dying. I get more than that just for going to Pret for people at work.

BIRTHDAYS ARE DIFFERENT
You get way less stuff.

EASTER IS DIFFERENT
Had to buy my own six-pack of Creme Eggs this year.

CHRISTMAS IS DIFFERENT
I HAD TO COOK MY OWN TURKEY.

YOUR PARENTS HAD SOME DARK SECRETS
I liked my dad until the other day when, 12 years after his demise, I learned that he killed our dog. For clarity, he didn’t just lunge for her one day and strangle her with his hands. But he did have to quietly put a cushion over her face and push down because we couldn’t afford the vet and she was on the way out anyway. I had quite fond memories of my father before this. Now all I can think of is him, sobbing into the air, knees on a cushion, while Suzie convulsed beneath him. Which sofa cushion did he use to kill our dog? Why did they tell me she went peacefully? Who else has he killed?

So many questions. So many haunting questions.

Joel's father.

ASHES ARE INCREDIBLY DIFFICULT TO DISPOSE OF
We forgot dad was still around until we found a tub full of his dusty remains in the back of my sister’s wardrobe one year. What was left of the family decided to scatter them somewhere vaguely important. If you’re planning to do this, ask your parents now, while they are vital and healthy, where they want to be scattered. (Everyone has an opinion about where ashes should be strewn and all of them are wrong. We basically had to draw straws to decide.). Similarly, when you’re tiptoeing onto a golf course because a family vote decided that it was the most vaguely appropriate place we could think of, don’t do it on a grey, overcast, windy Sunday afternoon, because you’ll get dad on your trousers.

PICKING FUNERAL MUSIC WILL TAKE A WEEK OF YOUR LIFE
When my mom died, she had ten CDs in her possession: Lou Bega’s "Mambo No. 5" (CD single), Tom Jones’ Reload, a load of crap by U2, and the self-titled Jiggerypipery by Jiggerypipery. If you are wondering, Jiggerypipery put a fun new modern twist on the bagpipes. They are so bad at music, if played loud while preparing dinner, they will put you off your mac and cheese. Meanwhile, I can only assume my dad heard Rumours in 1977 and thought, Well, that’s me. No more music for me. I’m full, because that and Eric Clapton: Greatest Hits were the only two tapes he ever had in the car when I was a kid.

“I guess he liked… Miles… Davis?” We played Miles Davis.

“I guess… she… really liked 'Ass in the Graveyard' by Jiggerypipery?” We did not play "Ass in the Graveyard" by Jiggerypipery. Can you imagine what a roomful of mourners would say if you played an exceptionally real bagpipe solo while your mom was slowly being wheeled into a fiery inferno? Can you imagine being at a funeral, sobbing behind sunglasses, while someone played Jiggery-fucking-pipery? They would say things like, "You know what? Probably best she’s gone." And, "Actually, can’t really make it to the wake. I know you’ve just spent $500 on vol-au-vents. But, I can’t come because you just played bagpipe music." And you would have to understand. Instead we played—and I’m not even joking here—music from the South African apartheid musical Sarafina! The funeral:wake ratio was a good 60:40, and we were lucky to have that.

YOU WILL PUT ON WEIGHT
If the last person who told you "mince is not a meal" succumbed to liver cancer in July 2013, know that without their gentle chiding, you'll chunk up a good five pounds in a year.

LIVER TWINGES ARE MORTALLY TERRIFYING
My mother died of liver cancer and, after years of cider-shaped abuse, the same organ disintegrated inside my dad like a roll of toilet paper dropped in the toilet. So, it's safe to say livers are not exactly my friend. Try having an indigestion-type of pain in the middle of your torso after both your parents got George Best’d to death without thinking you are dying, too.

HOUSES, LIKE, DETERIORATE?
We have not been able to make the hot water in my mom's house work for six actual months and nobody can figure out why. Also, where does dust come from? Because it is everywhere. And there is a looming scent coming from the basement that nobody wants to talk about. Is that odor "death"?

THERE'S A LOAD OF THINGS YOU NEVER THOUGHT YOU'D MISS
Every summer when I was a kid, we would fill the trunk of the car with vacation stuff and go somewhere bleakly seaside-y for a week. And every single time without fail my dad would desperately get the shits in the early morning hours before a long drive. I'll never watch my mom shouting through a bathroom door before my dad emerges—sweating and spraying Glade—ever again. I'll never have to make a pot of tea for my mother while she smokes and furiously does a crossword while my dad searches the big drawer for some Imodium. And I'll never have to walk into a bathroom full of nervous vacation diarrhea smells. It’s weird what you miss.

YOU ARE AN ADULT NOW
Despite having the face, mind, and the body of a giant, flabby-round-the-edges child, I am technically an adult. I own a house. I am the one true heir to the entire Golby bloodline. I went for two (two.) entire meetings at the bank.

"So, hold on, let me get this straight," the bank manager is saying. "Both your parents are dead?"

"Yes."

"Both?"

"Yes."

"Did they both go at once, or—?"

"No."

"It's just—and I hope you don't mind me saying—you're really young for that."

Dude, I know. Give me an savings account and shut up.

“Because, like: you’re 27.”

“I know.”

“You are younger than me.”

“Yes.”

“And I still live with my parents.”

“Hmm.”

THERE'S SOMETHING QUITE STRANGE ABOUT SLEEPING IN YOUR FAMILY HOME WHEN YOU ARE COMPLETELY ALONE
When I say "quite strange" I mean "fucking terrifying." Save one of your dad’s golf clubs. You’ll want to keep it under your bed.

Follow Joel on Twitter

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23 Aug 19:38

How the Islamic State Became the Juggernaut It Is Today

by Patrick Cockburn

IS militants in Iraq

The following article is an excerpt from a new book, The Jihadis Return: Isis and the New Sunni Uprising, by Patrick Cockburn, Middle East correspondent for The Independent. The book—published by OR Books, and available exclusively here—analyzes one of the West's worst foreign policy disasters and maps the rise of the new jihadis. This is the final chapter, "Shock and War."

In the second half of 2013 I started to write about the way in which jihadis were taking over the Syrian armed opposition; at the same time there was mounting evidence that ISIS, formerly al-Qaeda in Iraq, was rapidly increasing in strength. My newspaper, The Independent, asked me to nominate a “man of the year” for the Middle East and I chose Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, the shadowy figure who had become leader of ISIS in 2010.

A few days later, on the 3rd of January, 2014, ISIS moved into Fallujah and the government proved unable to recapture it. This was not quite as alarming as it might have been because the Iraqi prime minister was emphasising the mortal threat posed by Sunni counter revolution in Anbar province to scare the Shia majority into voting for him in the parliamentary election on the 30th of April as “Mr Security” and forgetting about government corruption and the lack of services. I thought that perhaps the failure to recapture the city was a deliberate electoral ploy and the assault on it would come after the poll.

But then well-informed Iraqis told me that the failure to retake Fallujah and crush ISIS in Anbar and elsewhere in northern Iraq had not happened for lack of trying. Five of the 15 divisions in the Iraqi army had been deployed in Anbar and had suffered heavy losses from casualties and desertions. Soldiers were sent to the front with only four clips of ammunition for their AK-47s; they went hungry because their commanders had embezzled the money to be spent on food; in oil-rich Iraq, fuel for army vehicles was in short supply; some battalions were down to a quarter of their established strength. “The army has suffered a very bad defeat in Anbar,” a former Iraqi minister told me sometime in April.

Despite these warnings, I was shocked a month or so later when, on the 10th of June, Mosul fell almost without a fight. Every derogatory story I had ever heard about the Iraqi army being a financial racket in which commanders bought their posts in order to grow rich on kickbacks and embezzlement turned out to be true. The ordinary soldiers may have run away in Mosul, but not as quickly as their generals, who turned up in civilian clothes in Erbil, the Kurdish capital. It had become apparent over the previous year that ISIS was run with a chilling blend of ideological fanaticism and military efficiency. Its campaign to take northern and western Iraq was expertly planned, choosing soft targets and avoiding well defended positions, or, as ISIS put it, moving “like a serpent through rocks.”

It was evident that Western governments had entirely misread the situation in Iraq and Syria. For two years Iraqi politicians had been warning anybody who would listen to them that if the civil war in Syria continued it would destabilise the fragile status quo in Iraq. When Mosul fell everybody blamed Maliki, who certainly had a lot to answer for, but the real cause of the debacle in Iraq was the war across its border. The revolt of the Syrian Sunni had caused a similar explosion in Iraq. Maliki had treated the Sunni provinces like a conquered country, but the Iraqi Sunni would not have risen again without the example and encouragement of their Syrian counterparts. The ascendancy of ISIS that resulted from its being able to act as the shock troops of a general Sunni revolt may yet be reversible. But the offensive they led in the summer of 2014 has likely ended forever the Shia-dominated state that was brought into being by the American invasion of 2003.

The fall of Mosul was only the latest of a series of unpleasant and unexpected events in the Middle East to catch the outside world by surprise. The region has always been treacherous ground for foreign intervention, but many of the reasons for Western failure to read the situation in the Middle East are recent and self-inflicted. The US response to the attacks of 9/11 in 2001 targeted the wrong countries when Afghanistan and Iraq were identified as the hostile states whose governments needed to be overthrown. Meanwhile, the two countries most involved in supporting al-Qaeda and favoring the ideology behind the attacks, Saudi Arabia and Pakistan, were largely ignored and given a free pass.

Both were long-standing US allies, and remained so despite 9/11. Saudi Arabia may be now pulling back on its sponsorship of jihadi fighters in Syria and elsewhere around the world for fear of blowback in the kingdom itself. Pakistan Prime Minister Nawaz Sharif may insist that he is doing all he can to rid the Pakistan security services of their extremist elements. But until the United States and its allies in the West recognize that these states are key in promoting Islamic extremism, little real progress will be made in the battle to isolate the jihadists.

It was not governments alone that got it wrong. So too did the reformers and revolutionaries who regarded the uprisings of the “Arab Spring” of 2011 as a death blow to the old authoritarian regimes across the region. For a brief moment, sectarianism and dictatorship seemed to be crumbling; the Arab world was standing at the entrance to a brave new future free of religious hate, where political enemies fought out their differences in democratic elections. Three years later, with the democracy movements having retreated all over the region in the face of successful counter revolution and mounting sectarian violence, this enthusiasm seems naive. It is worth analyzing why a progressive revolutionary alternative to police states and jihadi movements like ISIS has failed so comprehensively.

A protester waving the Egyptian Flag during the 2011 anti-Mubarak protests in Tahrir Square, Cairo (Photo via)

The revolutions and popular uprisings of 2011 were as genuine as any in history, but the way they were perceived, particularly in the West, was often seriously awry.

Unexpectedness is in the nature of revolutionary change: I have always believed that if I can spot a revolution coming, so can the head of the Mukhabarat security police. He will do everything possible to prevent it happening. Real revolutions come into being because of an unpredictable and surprising coincidence of people and events with different motives coming together to target a common enemy such as Hosni Mubarak or Bashar al-Assad. The political, social and economic roots of the upsurges of 2011 are very complex. That this wasn’t obvious to everyone at the time is partly a result of the way foreign commentators exaggerated the role of new information technology.

Protesters, skilled in propaganda if nothing else, saw the advantage of presenting the uprisings as unthreatening “velvet” revolutions with English-speaking, well-educated bloggers and tweeters prominently in the vanguard. The purpose was to convey to Western publics that the new revolutionaries were comfortingly similar to themselves, and that what was happening in the Middle East in 2011 was like the anti-communist and pro-Western uprisings in Eastern Europe after 1989.

Opposition demands were all about personal freedom: social and economic inequalities were rarely declared to be issues, even when they were driving popular rage against the status quo. In the years prior to the Syrian revolt, the center of Damascus had been taken over by smart shops and restaurants, while the mass of Syrians saw their salaries stagnating in the face of rising prices. Farmers, ruined by four years of drought, were moving into shanty towns on the outskirts of the cities. The UN reported that between two and three million Syrians were living in “extreme poverty.” Small manufacturing companies were being put out of business by cheap imports from Turkey and China. Economic liberalization, lauded in foreign capitals, was rapidly concentrating wealth in the hands of a politically well-connected few. Even members of the Mukhabarat, the secret police, were trying to survive on $200 a month.

An International Crisis Group report pointed out that Syria’s ruling class “has inherited power rather than fought for it... and mimicked the ways of the urban upper class.” The same was true of the quasi-monarchical families and their associates operating in parallel fashion in Egypt, Libya and Iraq. Confident of their police-state protection, they ignored the hardships of the rest of the population, especially the under- employed, overeducated and numerous youth, few of whom felt that they had any chance of improving their lives.

Libyan youths celebrate on top of a tank abandoned by the country's military, 2011 (Photo via)

A simple-minded delusion that most problems would vanish once democracies had replaced the old police states was at the heart of the new reformist governments in the Middle East, be they in Iraq in 2005 or Libya in 2011. Opposition movements, persecuted at home or living a hand-to-mouth existence in exile, were reassured by such a notion and it was certainly easy to sell to foreign sponsors. However, a great disadvantage of this way of seeing things was that Saddam, Assad and Gaddafi were so demonized it became difficult to engineer anything approaching a compromise or a peaceful transition from the old to a new regime.

In Iraq in 2003, former members of the Ba'ath Party were sacked, thus impoverishing a large part of the population, which had no alternative but to fight. The Syrian opposition refused to attend peace talks in Geneva in 2014 if Assad was allowed to play a role there, even though the areas of Syria under his control were home to most of the population. These exclusion policies were partly a way of guaranteeing jobs for the boys among the opposition. But they deepened sectarian, ethnic and tribal divisions, and provided the ingredients for civil war.

What is the glue that is supposed to hold these new post-revolutionary states together? Nationalism isn’t much in favor in the West, where it is seen as a mask for racism or militarism, supposedly outmoded in an era of globalization and humanitarian intervention. But intervention in Iraq in 2003 and Libya in 2011 turned out to be very similar to imperial takeovers in the 19th century. There was absurd talk of “nation-building” to be carried out or assisted by foreign powers, which clearly had their own interests in mind just as Britain did when Lloyd George orchestrated the carve-up of the Ottoman Empire. A justification for the Arab leaders who seized power in the late 1960s was that they would create powerful states capable, finally, of giving reality to national independence.

They didn’t wholly fail: Gaddafi played a crucial role in raising the price of oil in 1973, and Hafez al-Assad, Bashar’s father, who had taken power in Syria two years earlier, created a state that could hold its own in a protracted struggle with Israel for predominance in Lebanon. To opponents of these regimes, nationalism was simply a propaganda ploy on the part of ruthless dictatorships concerned to justify their hold on power. But without nationalism—even where the unity of the nation is something of a historic fiction—states lack an ideology that enables them to compete as a focus of loyalty with religious sects or ethnic groups.

It’s easy enough to criticize the rebels and reformers in the Arab world for failing to resolve the dilemmas they faced in overturning the status quo. Their actions seem confused and ineffective when compared to the Cuban revolution or the liberation struggle in Vietnam. But the political terrain in which they have had to operate over the last 20 years has been particularly tricky. The dissolution of the Soviet Union in 1991 meant that the endorsement or tolerance of the US, and the US alone, was crucial for a successful takeover of power. Nasser was able to turn to Moscow to assert Egyptian independence in the Suez crisis of 1956, but after the Soviet collapse smaller states could no longer find a place for themselves between Moscow and Washington.

Saddam said in 1990 that one of the reasons he invaded Kuwait when he did was that in the future such a venture would no longer be feasible as Iraq would be faced with unopposed American power. In the event, he got his diplomatic calculations spectacularly wrong, but his forecast was otherwise realistic, at least until perceptions of American military might were downgraded by Washington’s failure to achieve its aims in Afghanistan and Iraq.

Islamic State fighters in Syria

The deteriorating situation in Iraq and Syria may now have gone too far to re-create genuinely unitary states. Iraq is breaking up. Having taken over the northern oil city of Kirkuk, which they have long claimed as their capital, the Kurds will never surrender it or other disputed territories from which they were ethnically cleansed. Meanwhile, government rule over the Sunni Arab heartlands of north and central Iraq has evaporated with the disintegration of the Iraqi army. The government might continue to hold the capital and the Shia-majority provinces farther south, but it will have great difficulty in re-establishing its authority over Sunni villages and towns across the country.

Dr Safa Rusoul Hussein, the Iraqi Deputy National Security Advisor, told me that “when 100 ISIS fighters take over an area they normally recruit five or ten times their original force. These are not frontline fighters and they may join just to defend their families, but ISIS numbers grow rapidly.”

Outside help for the Iraqi government is unpredictable. Foreign intervention is as likely to come from Iran as from the United States. As a fellow Shia-majority state, Iraq matters even more to Tehran than Syria and Iran has emerged as the most influential foreign power in Baghdad since the 2003 invasion. The Iranian president Hassan Rouhani has said that Iran will act to combat “the violence and terrorism” of ISIS; indeed, for a week the Baghdad rumor machine was claiming that Iranian battalions were already in Iraq, though this was unconfirmed by actual sightings.

As for the US, war weariness at home rules out the return of ground troops, though advisers are being sent. Even air strikes are problematically effective because ISIS operates as a guerrilla army without easily visible movements of personnel or equipment that can be targeted. Its leadership is well practiced at keeping out of sight. The ISIS offensive has succeeded because it has been joined by a wide uprising of former Iraqi army officers who fought the Americans and young men from Sunni villages and towns across the country. Attacking such forces with manned aircraft or drones will further anger the Sunni community, and, if ISIS fighters start being killed by US air strikes, it may not be long before an organization renowned for its ruthlessness when seeking revenge sends its suicide bombers to destroy American targets. In any event, the likelihood of US military success is remote. It’s important to recall that, with air bases throughout the country and 150,000 soldiers on the ground, neither of which it has today, the US still failed to win an eight-year-long war.

Furthermore, the US is unlikely to want to appear as the preserver of Shia dominance over the Sunni minority, especially when exercised by a government in Baghdad that is as sectarian, corrupt and dysfunctional as Saddam’s ever was. There may be less state violence than before 2003, but only because the state is weaker. The Maliki government’s methods are equally brutal: Iraqi prisons are full of people who have made false confessions under torture or the threat of it. Sunni villages near Fallujah are full of families with sons on death row. An Iraqi intellectual who had planned to open a museum in Abu Ghraib prison so that Iraqis would never forget the barbarities of Saddam’s regime found that there was no space available because the cells were full of new inmates. Iraq is still an extraordinarily dangerous place. “I never imagined that ten years after the fall of Saddam you would still be able to get a man killed in Baghdad by paying $100,” an Iraqi who’d been involved in the abortive museum project told me.

Islamic State militants

As Iraq disintegrates into separate Shia, Sunni and Kurdish regions, the process is likely to be painful and violent. Sectarian confrontations will be unavoidable where there are mixed populations, such as in and around Baghdad, with its seven million people. It seems unlikely that the country could be partitioned without extensive bloodshed and several million refugees. A possible outcome is an Iraqi version of the wrenching violence that accompanied the partition of India in 1947.

The situation is equally bleak in Syria. Too many conflicts and too many players have become involved for any peace terms to be acceptable to all. Comparison is frequently made with the Lebanese civil war, which lasted from 1975 to 1990, with the comforting moral drawn that, bloody though that conflict was, all sides eventually became exhausted and put away their guns. But the war did not quite end like that: it was Saddam Hussein’s invasion of Kuwait in 1990 and Syria’s decision to join the US-led coalition to evict him that led Washington to tolerate Syria extinguishing the last resistance to its rule in Lebanon. It is not a very comforting parallel.

There is no doubt that the Syrian people, both inside and outside the country, are utterly exhausted and demoralized by the civil war and would do almost anything to end it. But they are no longer in a position to determine their own fate. Saudi Arabia and Qatar are arming and training a new “moderate military opposition” that will supposedly fight Assad and ISIS and other al-Qaeda-type groups. But it is not clear that the “moderate” military opposition has any substance except as a tightly controlled cat’s paw of foreign powers.

Only time will tell if President Assad is strong enough to break the current stalemate in Syria, though this seems unlikely. The combat forces of the Syrian army have hitherto been able to fight on only one front at a time, while it has become increasingly obvious that al-Qaeda type movements—notably ISIS, JAN and Ahrar al-Sham—can operate freely across Syria’s borders with Iraq and Turkey. They have a vast hinterland in which to maneuver.

So long as the civil war continues, fanatical groups such as ISIS, with legions of fighters who are prepared to sacrifice their lives, will continue to hold the upper hand over moderates who might be more open to negotiations. In this situation, the importance of Syrian public opinion is diminishing steadily. However, it still counts for something. One of the few positive events to occur in Syria in the early summer of 2014 was the evacuation of the Old City of Homs by 1,200 fighters, who were allowed to bring their personal weapons to rebel-held territory, while, at the same time, two pro-regime Shia towns, Zahraa and Nubl, besieged for two years by the opposition, were able to receive humanitarian convoys. In addition, 70 hostages taken in Aleppo and Latakia were released. Encouragement can be drawn from the fact that different rebel groups were sufficiently coherent to negotiate and implement an agreement, something that had been deemed impossible. This kind of local peace negotiation cannot stop the overall conflict, but it can save lives along the way.

None of the religious parties that took power, whether in Iraq in 2005 or Egypt in 2012, has been able to consolidate its authority. Rebels everywhere look for support from the foreign enemies of the state they are trying to overthrow. The Syrian opposition can only reflect the policies and divisions of its sponsors. Resistance to the state was too rapidly militarized for opposition movements to develop an experienced national leadership and a political program. The discrediting of nationalism and communism, combined with the need to say what the US wanted to hear, meant that they were at the mercy of events, lacking any vision of a non-authoritarian nation state capable of competing with the religious fanaticism of the Sunni militants of ISIS and similar movements financed by the oil states of the Gulf. Now the results of this have spread across the border to Iraq. The Middle East is entering a long period of ferment in which counter revolution may prove as difficult to consolidate as revolution itself.

This is an extract from Patrick Cockburn's new book The Jihadis Return: Isis and the New Sunni Uprising, published by OR Books, available exclusively here.

 

22 Aug 15:04

This Corgi Getting A Massage Might Be The Chillest Thing You See Today

Much relax, very wow.

Chill dog gets chill massage.

Via youtube.com

You now wish you were born a dog.

You now wish you were born a dog.

Via youtube.com

What a life.

What a life.

Via youtube.com

Being a human is THE WORST!

Being a human is THE WORST!

Via youtube.com


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22 Aug 14:04

I Love This Kittens Learning to Walk Compilation

by Rebecca Rose on Jezebel, shared by Katharine Trendacosta to io9

Let's all settle back and watching nearly three minutes of adorable kittens learning to walk for the first time.

Read more...


22 Aug 11:02

J.K. Rowling Releases New Song and Bio For Celestina Warbeck, the “Singing Sorceress” - She's charmed the heart right out of me!

by Victoria McNally

celestina

The truly obsessed Harry Potter fans know Celestina Warbeck: she was a singer first mentioned in Chamber of Secrets whose songs appeared here and there throughout the series, usually in the backgrounds of scenes. Apparently she’s author JR Rowling’s favorite character to never actually appear in the franchise, and in honor of her birthday today, Rowling has released a bunch of new information about the Singing Sorceress— including an audio track.

Rowling told Today in an exclusive:

Celestina Warbeck is one of my favourite ‘off-stage’ characters in the Harry Potter series, and has been part of the Potter world ever since its inception, making an early appearance in the short-lived ‘Daily Prophet’ series I produced for members of the equally short-lived fan club run by my British publisher, Bloomsbury. Although we never lay eyes on Celestina during the whole seven volumes of the Potter books, I always imagined her to resemble Shirley Bassey in both looks and style. I stole her first name from a friend with whom I worked, years ago, at Amnesty International’s Headquarters in London; ‘Celestina’ was simply begging to be scooped up and attached to a glamorous witch.

In addition to the lengthy bio excerpted by Today and posted in full to Pottermore, Rowling has also released a single for “You Stole My Cauldron But You Can’t Have My Heart” that you have to unlock on Pottermore through interacting with the website. The best part of the bio? When she outlines how Warbeck’s mother would frequently write to Hogwarts complaining of the school’s severe lack of “a choir, theatre club and dancing class to showcase her daughter’s talents.” Lady, Hogwarts students don’t even learn math. Of course they don’t have a drama department.

It’s unclear whether the singer on this new track is one of the several actresses who play Warbeck at the recently opened Wizarding World of Harry Potter Diagon Alley attraction in Orlando, Florida. But if, like me, you can’t remember your Pottermore username and password, you can watch the below video of her stage show to get an idea of what you’re missing out on:

This new update from the Potter author marks the second time in the past few months that she’s released new writing on the series, despite having “no immediate plans” to write a sequel series. The first was a World-Cup inspired Quidditch article from the POV of Rita Skeeter, which crashed the Pottermore website due to the amount of web traffic it received.

(via Today)

Previously in Potter

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22 Aug 11:00

Games for Girls? How About Games for Everyone? - Gender-neutral games are too hard to animate.

by Mary Lee Sauder

minecraft top

The following was originally posted on Mary Lee Sauder’s blog and has been republished with permission.

The portrayal and treatment of women in and around video games is a sore subject for a lot of us. It’s been talked about to death, and yet it still doesn’t seem like we’re making much progress. It’s a very polarizing but uniformly upsetting issue that lingers on in this otherwise great community like cat pee on an oriental rug.

The most common solution I see proposed to solve this problem is making more games that girls can enjoy. And while there is definitely a place for games directed specifically at girls and women—like hidden object games and Diner Dash—they don’t tend to integrate girls into the larger world of (mostly male-focused) video game culture. In some ways, making “girl games” serves only to segregate the sexes even further. So I think that, moving forward, we should focus less on making “games for girls” and more on making games for everyone.

games for girls

Because right now, these are the only games that young girls are presented with. Yikes.

Extra Credits once had an episode about propaganda games and the harm that can come from normal game developers accidentally indoctrinating a particular point of view into the player via lazy design. For example, making Middle Eastern men a default enemy type in modern combat games has potentially increased the amount of Arabic racial slurs on services like Xbox Live.

Well, I think the same principle can be applied to the treatment of women in games. Developers have mostly been making games for the core audience of young adult men for… forever, basically. But even though demographics have changed over the years to include more and more women, games have not evolved to take their sensibilities into account. We in the gaming community are a mixed bag, but the overwhelming majority of mainstream titles brought out each year still trumpet the masculine power fantasy and feature cookie cutter girls in skimpy outfits or, worse, no female characters at all. I’m looking at you, Assassin’s Creed. 

games2

Pictured: Possibly the best ever representation of the male power fantasy in a single image. Thanks, Gears of War!

Even games that are otherwise great often fall victim to lazy design by, say, dressing a female character up like a prostitute to sell more games. Sadly, I have to rake one of my favorite games over the coals for this. Tales of Symphonia developers, why is Sheena’s kimono top open like that? She’s a great character, but her sexy outfit doesn’t fit her personality at all. She is a determined young woman who is trying desperately to prove that she can redeem herself for the harm she has caused others in the past. The only reason she dresses like that is so that the artists could slap her on the cover to get customers to look at it.

3

However, sometimes these design choices can make sense. Shiki, from The World Ends With You, shows a lot of skin, but that’s because everyone in the game is dressed as a parody of Japanese hipper-than-thou street fashion. Shiki, in particular, tries really hard to fit in and look cooler than she actually has the confidence to be. Here, the skimpy outfit works because it’s relevant to the character’s personality.

Once again, there’s a time and a place for all kinds of things. There is absolutely nothing wrong with games like Call of Duty or even Dead or Alive existing. The gaming market needs a little bit of everything, and if gunning down terrorist insurgents while being hailed as a war hero or fighting as a large-boobied schoolgirl in a heavily stylized and tongue-in-cheek world where her appearance kind of makes sense is your cup of tea, then godspeed. The industry will keep your gaming library stocked for many years to come. But developers can’t just keep focusing exclusively on those customers forever, or they’ll lose the rest of us who would rather play something that speaks to our own interests.

minecraft

So. Games for everyone. What do I mean by that? Well, the gist is that I think developers should be making more gender-neutral games, rather than just trying to “balance out” the many male-targeted games with female-targeted ones. If there are more games that boys and girls alike can enjoy, then we can raise a new generation of kids who are brought together by games, not driven apart along gender lines.

Take Minecraft, for example. To say that this game is popular among young kids is like saying that Tim Burton just sort of likes working with Johnny Depp. It’s astounding how much this game has taken off with both boys and girls. And why? Because it’s basically LEGO 2.0, and what kid in their right mind doesn’t love creating, exploring, and forging their own destiny? It’s like exploring the forest behind your house and building a secret fort, but without all of the mosquito bites.

We need more games like Minecraft that encourage creativity and exploration to get girls to grow up loving video games. I had Pokémon and the Nintendo 64 Legend of Zelda games, but even then I couldn’t play as a girl in the former until three years after I had started the series, and the weird gender politics of Princess Zelda getting captured near the end of Ocarina of Time never gelled well with me.

protags

We need more developers to realize that bland, generically attractive female characters with low cut tops don’t get off scot free anymore just because they’re in a video game. We need more female role models in the industry, but we’re not going to get that if we keep treating them like garbage (more on that another time). We need more events like this camp that encourages girls to make games together and gives them the professional recognition that they deserve. If we don’t, and the next E3 conference is yet another smattering of the same male-targeted games with the same committee-designed protagonists, then I’ll have no right to keep being surprised when more and more of my female friends say that games just aren’t for them. And I don’t want to live in a world like that.

You can read more from Mary Lee Sauder on The Story Campaign or follow her on Twitter.

Previously in video games

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22 Aug 10:39

Monday, August 18 @ 8:21:16 pm

by dw
21 Aug 19:33

Adelgazar no es el camino hacia la felicidad

by Sergio Parra

Si te pliegas a los cánones de belleza vigentes (actualmente una figura delgada y esbelta), presumiblemente serás más feliz. Sin embargo, esta idea intuitiva acaba de ser derribada en un estudio realizado por la University College London y que ha sido publicado en la revista PloS One.

Para llegar a esta conclusión sobre la salud mental de quienes adelgazan, se llevó a cabo un análisis de de 1.979 adultos con sobrepeso y obesidad que perdieron el 5% o más de su peso corporal inicial durante un período de seguimiento de 4 años.

Los resultados fueron que, si bien los participantes estaba más sanos y tenían una mejor salud física, también eran más propensos a sentirse deprimidos, en comparación con los que se mantuvieron en su peso original. Según Sarah Jackson, autora principal del estudio:

No queremos desanimar a nadie que quiera tratar de bajar peso, ya que tiene enormes beneficios físicos, pero las personas no deben esperar la pérdida de peso para mejorar al instante todos los aspectos de su vida. La publicidad de las dietas puede dar expectativas poco realistas acerca de la pérdida de peso. A menudo prometen mejoras de la vida inmediatas, que no puede ser corroboradas en la realidad para muchas personas. Así que la gente debe ser realista acerca de la pérdida de peso y estar preparada para los desafío.

Vía | La Gaceta

Imagen | Rafel Miro4076412628_1228b8412a_o.jpg

-
La noticia Adelgazar no es el camino hacia la felicidad fue publicada originalmente en Xatakaciencia por Sergio Parra.




21 Aug 18:28

Lo dice la ciencia: la gente guapa vive más y mejor

by S Moda EL PAÍS
Un estudio asegura que las personas que cuentan con una apariencia privilegiada (o saben cómo sacarse partido) viven más y son más felices.
21 Aug 18:25

La falsa Miley Cyrus: un culo muy auténtico

by Pinjed
La falsa Miley Cyrus: un culo muy auténtico

Ya hablamos de Miley May hace no demasiado, cuando Miley Cyrus estaba en lo más alto de su carrera post-Disney y Devil's Films lo aprovechó para...

  
21 Aug 17:55

La asociación Abeiro califica de «cruel» la situación de las aves en los parques de Santiago

by santiago / LA VOZ
Critica la presencia de aves muertas, que permanecen varios días sin ser retiradas, y situaciones de maltrato a patos
21 Aug 17:54

«No eres de Negreira si no...»

Este nuevo grupo de Facebook cuenta en menos de una semana de vida con más de setecientos seguidores
21 Aug 17:43

Galicia, refén de Audasa ata 2048

by David Lombao

O 18 de agosto de dentro de trinta e catro anos finaliza o período concesional da AP-9, que acumula indignación cidadá mentres ingresa uns 300.000 euros diarios en peaxes. Repasamos a historia da principal vía de comunicación terrestre do país e da súa concesionaria. Infografía no interior

21 Aug 17:34

Louis C.K.



Louis C.K.

21 Aug 17:07

‘La canción de Apolo’, el alma según Tezuka

by Sergio Benítez

La cancion de Apolo

No seré yo el que afirme, ni así me despellejen, que un título firmado por Osamu Tezuka, trascendidas sus infantiles incursiones iniciales en el mundo del noveno arte, pueda ser considerado como otra cosa que no sea IMPRESCINDIBLE. Pero lo cierto es que dejando de lado dicha disquisición, y quizás contraviniéndola, cuando uno ha leído tanto del Dios del Manga, cuando se ha bebido las páginas de sus obras más representativas, aquellas que lo encumbran como uno de los indiscutibles pináculos de la disciplina artística que más líneas ocupa en esta vuestra página, cuando ha pasado muchas horas asombrándose ante el portentoso genio narrativo del maestro nipón y observado la inmensa influencia que sus modos han tenido a lo largo y ancho del mundillo del cómic a nivel mundial…es cuando termina siendo consciente de que, por muy bien que sean recibidas (y lo son), el rescate de aquellas obras que permanecían inéditas en nuestro país no redunda en exceso en saciar unas ansias que ya se han visto colmadas de sobra durante la última década.

Eso no quita, obviamente, para que cuando uno se acerca a las páginas de esta ‘La canción de Apolo’, se sienta por momentos invadido por los mismos sentimientos de asombro y admiración que le acompañaron a lo largo de las lecturas de títulos como ‘Adolf’, ‘El libro de los insectos humanos’ o los primeros volúmenes de la majestuosa ‘Fénix’. Pero, como decía, son percepciones adormiladas por el largo trayecto efectuado sobre la tebeografía del autor japonés, y no cuesta mucho identificar en esta historia acerca de Shogo, un joven incapaz de amar que será castigado por la diosa Atenea a vivir incontables historias de amor sin que ninguna de ellas llegue a buen término, esquemas tanto argumentales como visuales ya experimentados en alguna de las citadas obras o en las otras muchas que componen el vasto panorama de la producción del desaparecido guionista y dibujante.

Claro está, que todo ello queda paliado por el hecho de que, de partida, cualquier manga de Tezuka se sitúa muy por encima de la media de todo lo que se edita en España de cómic venido del país del sol naciente y, en el caso que nos ocupa, por la voluntad del maestro de que ‘La canción de Apolo’ sirva, como sus grandes obras, de preciso análisis de la condición humana. A esa voluntad, tan explorada en las obras maestras que jalonan todo aquello que el artista desarrolló en vida, el presente título aporta pequeños granos de arena que validan su lectura por completar el gigantesco mural acerca del hombre que Tezuka dibujó sobre un tapiz aviñetado tan asombroso como complejo. Un tapiz en el que ‘La canción de Apolo’ se establece como un eslabón más, tan brillante como la media del autor, aunque quizás no de la intensa relevancia que uno habría deseado que atesorara. Con todo, por si no ha quedado muy claro, una lectura sobresaliente.

La canción de Apolo

  • Autores: Osamu Tezuka
  • Editorial: ECC
  • Encuadernación: Rústica
  • Páginas: 544 páginas
  • Precio: 25 euros
21 Aug 16:49

Auto-Tropos: Ahorro Telefónico

by Jónatan Sark

Uno de los trucos más antiguos de los productores baratos, algo que a estas alturas aún se sigue usando. El Ahorro Telefónico es ese momento en que para hacer avanzar la trama se usa un teléfono para hacer llegar información al espectador. En lugar de organizar una escena o buscar una manera más elaborada de facilitar esa información habrá un intercambio. Que generalmente se organizará de una de estas maneras:

- El Teléfono como Pared.

Posiblemente el más viejo y, a la vez, el más ridículo de todos. Un autor tiene que comunicar al público cierta información, de manera que uno de sus personajes descolgará el teléfono y empezará a relatar información teóricamente a su interlocutor pero en realidad a los espectadores. Solo ligeramente mejor que decirla en voz alto sin motivo alguno.

“Williams, ¿está usted ahí? Sepa que lo asesinatos han vuelto a empezar en el Hospital Johnson, de nuevo en luna llena como las tres veces anteriores. Y, además, parece que el joven de los Aberddyne ha estado por aquí husmeando, no ha debido de olvidar la muerte de su novia o que el Abogado Leeds esté ahora al cargo de las posesiones de la familia. Sí, Williams, es un caso complicado.”

- El Personaje como Pared.

Hay una variedad incluso más ridícula, por difícil que sea de creer -Y que sí tiene Tropo en TVTropes, pero vamos a incluirlo igual para tenerlo todo juntito-. Aquella en la que el personaje que está realizando la llamada comienza a repetir en alto lo que le están contando, ejerciendo de algo así como de Pared Hablante. Pocas cosas más ridículas se pueden ver en una obra.

“Sí, dígame, Williams. ¿Qué? ¿Que la tía de la bella señorita Lerry ha sido encontrada amordazada en la cocina? ¿Y que han revuelto todos sus papeles? ¿Cómo que parece que alguien ha robado una foto? ¿El sospechosos iba envuelto en una capa negra y por eso la criada no le ha visto cuando ha escapado? Demonios, Williams, este caso se complica por momentos.”

- Me acaban de comunicar.

La manera más sencilla de ahorrar tiempo y hacer avanzar la trama es, directamente, colocar la llamada en elíptico. Generalmente aparecerá un personaje colgando el teléfono -ahora con los móviles muchos los estarán colgando A LA VEZ que comienzan a hablar- para comunicar a otros personajes que acaba de recibir una información que pasa a relatarles. Un recurso sencillo y cotidiano que puede pasar incluso desapercibido.

*clic* “Señores, malas noticias, Williams me acaba de comunicar que el criminal fugado del psiquiátrico al que detuvimos estuvo ayer asaltando una licorería a la hora de los hechos. Tenemos que seguir buscando a nuestro culpable.”

- La Llamada de Resolver Agendas.

Hay una versión especialmente divertida de este no-lo-llamaré-Tropo que es cuando dos personajes tienen que tener una conversación en la que ambos deben participar pero por lo que sea no van a molestarse en cuadrar las agendas, quizá uno de ellos sea solo un secundario o un invitado al que hay que aprovechar en un corto espacio de tiempo. El resultado puede acaba siendo con cierta facilidad que esa conversación la tengan por teléfono, bien con pantalla partida bien turnándose.

“¿Williams, alguna novedad?”

“Parece que el Doctor Johnson ha comprado una gran cantidad de material, en el banco nos han confirmado que tiene problemas.”

“Espero que hayan revisado bien todos esos datos, necesito saber cuanto antes hasta dónde se extiende el asunto.”

“Nuestro equipo está investigando y parece que pronto podremos decirle de dónde sale el dinero.”

“En cuanto sepa cualquier cosa llámeme, ¡sin dudar!”.

- El Método Livingstone

Aprovecho para realizar una mención de honor en este último tropo para Joe Livingstone (Godfrey Ho) que no tuvo reparos en usar llamadas telefónicas para conectar entre sí el metraje de las pelis que compraba o algún inserto de material nuevo rodado. Y de ahí cosas como la magnífica Trilogía Vampírica de Robo Vampire, El diablo de la dinamita y Contraespionaje en la selva. Para que luego digan que no se puede crear algo nuevo desde algo existente aplicando los tropos.

“Williams, deprisa, mande refuerzos, parece que ya lo tenemos.”

“¡¡¡Un malvado monstruo gigante ha salido de las alcantarillas!!! ¡¡¡Va a devorarnos a todos!!! ¡Sin duda es el producto de los impíos experimentos del [Doctor Johnson]!”

“Creo que esta vez le atraparemos, pero necesitamos toda su ayuda.”

“Hemos mandado a todos los chicos a combatirlos, que Dios se apiade de su alma.”

“En cuanto puedan que vengan. Mientras tanto nosotros iremos dándole caza. ¡Esta misma noche acabarán nuestros problemas!.”

19 Aug 17:49

Crayons To Perfume Girl Of The Week, the Swingin' Sylvie Vartan!

by noreply@blogger.com (GirlGroupGirl)
Sylvie Vartan started her career as a high school student, swayed by the promise that her brother, Eddie had in store for her when he promised to record her, instead of Gillian Hills. Gillian had turned him down for a record he was producing for RCA.
RCA saw stars when they saw and heard Sylvie, and made her a recording offer she couldn't refuse - Rock 'n Roll!
Here's Sylvie palling around with her friends, including Jacques Dutronc on a French TV show doing 'L'oiseau' in 1967.


If you go right to Youtube, you will notice that the footage is posted by CinnamunK - his entire roster of footage and music is all girl, and is filled with tons of great tracks. Check it out sometime!

But before you do, dig Sylvie in this fab Japanese commercial for Renown Fashions! She sings in French and Japanese! SO MOD!


Now check out the latest Crayons To Perfume where Sylvie takes center stage along with some girls in 60's rock groups, a handful of soulful sisters and a bunch of girls singin' about boys! Don't forget to stay tuned next Monday, when we have a new and super duper swingin' special ALL GIRL SURF SHOW!!!

-Crayons to Perfume is exclusive to WFUM's Rock'n Soul Ichiban! A weekly 1 hour show devoted to girls from 1960-1969 (and a handful of modern missies) hosted by Glynis Ward, DJ girlgroupgirl
18 Aug 10:21

Los tebeos del futuro

by Gerardo Vilches

Cuando hace unos meses comparé determinadas series de la actualidad de Marvel —Hawkeye, She-Hulk, FF— con la explosión de los setenta, pensaba en cosas como Man Thing, Howard the Duck o Deadly Hands of Kung-Fu, pero si hubiera leído antes de escribirlo Omega the Unknown, desde luego que ésta habría sido mi referencia. Porque en esta locura de diez números he encontrado la semilla de muchas cosas, entre ellas estas series de autor que Marvel cobija en la actualidad.

Detrás de ella se encuentran los guionistas Mary Skrenes —una de las primeras mujeres en firmar guiones en la editorial— y Steve Gerber. Debería haber añadido un «obviamente» a su nombre, porque su nombre aparece asociado a las series más extravagantes de la década. Su huella no fue tan fuerte como la de Steve Englehart o Gery Conway, pero dado el poco tiempo que permaneció en la editorial, proporcionalmente puede que no sea menor su influencia. Al menos abrió un camino que podemos llamar underground, una vía para un cierto tipo de humor satírico influido por la MAD que no cuadraba demasiado con el tono medio de la producción de Marvel pero sin la que, seguramente, no habría existido la Hulka de John Byrne o las diferentes series de Deadpool. Como suele pasar con estas cosas, lo que sí se perdió por el camino y quedó como oasis en desierto fue la intención política de la sátira de Gerber. Leídos hoy algunos de sus tebeos parecen, seamos sinceros, algo ingenuos, pero otros sorprenden, sobre todo porque aparecieron con el sello protocolario de la Comics Code Authority. Sin embargo, no es en Omega the Unknown donde desarrolló esta faceta. Omega es otra cosa.

omega1

Con la excepción de un número que escribe Roger Stern, todo está escrito a cuatro manos por Gerber y Skrenes, y dibujado por Jim Mooney. Mooney era buen dibujante pero siempre he pensado que su ortodoxia algo sosa lo situaba por debajo de los mejores lápices de Marvel en aquellos años. Parece una elección sorprendente para una serie rara como Omega the Unknown, pero la verdad es que es uno de sus mejores trabajos, y, de todas formas, ya sabemos todos que en esa época todo estaba mucho menos estudiado de lo que puede parecer. Sin embargo, el equipo creativo se mantiene estable durante los diez números que dura la serie y le da una unidad que no era demasiado habitual en series tan secundarias como ésta.

La premisa es en sí misma una marcianada: arranca en plena acción, con un superhéroe de capa roja y botas altas totalmente genérico escapando de unos hombres metálicos. Rápidamente la acción cambia a la habitación de un adolescente, James-Michael, no mucho más joven de lo que era Peter Parker cuando se convirtió en Spider-Man. James-Michael parece superdotado y extremadamente maduro para su edad; es una visión del adolescente lejos de los clichés del género, que descoloca más que cualquier otra cosa de estos tebeos. James-Michael ha sido educado por sus padres durante toda su vida, en casa, pero ahora éstos han decidido que tiene que ir a un colegio normal para relacionarse con otros chicos de su edad, aunque él no quiere hacerlo. Al día siguiente parten en coche hacia la nueva escuela y tienen un brutal accidente. Y a partir de ahí, la cabeza del lector no para de explotar una y otra vez: los padres de James-Michael eran robots. El chico despierta del coma meses después en un hospital. Tiene visiones, oye voces —que el lector nunca llega a escuchar—, acaba yéndose a vivir con la enfermera que le cuida y su compañera de piso a la Cocina del Infierno. Gerber hasta cuela algún golito en forma de tensión sexual subterránea entre la compañera y el chaval, al que saca no menos de seis años. James-Michael resulta capaz de lanzar los mismos rayos que el superhéroe misterioso, mudo durante la mayor parte de la serie y que también se instala en el mismo barrio. Parece haber alguna conexión entre ambos que hace que cuando el héroe es herido el chico sufra el mismo dolor, y en una ocasión en la que se encuentran el superhéroe le dice que comparten un secreto… pero eso es todo.

omega3

Lo verdaderamente extraordinario de Omega the Unknown es que su misterio se mantiene durante diez números. Por supuesto que había habido antes enigmas sin resolver durante tanto tiempo, y por más, incluso. Por ejemplo así fue con la identidad del Duende Verde. Pero el Duende era un villano que aparecía de vez en cuando en The Amazing Spider-Man, no el personaje protagonista. Lo normal habría sido que la relación entre el chico y el superhéroe quedara clara en el primer número, el número del origen secreto, y a partir de sentar las bases del concepto de la serie se fueran desarrollando aventuras. Pero en esta serie el misterio no se resuelve nunca, y las pistas que se van soltando no terminan de configurar un statu quo. O mejor dicho, el statu quo es esa permanente indefinición, de la que nunca hay una verdadera clausura. La época impone rutinas mecánias a Skrenes y Gerber, y en cada uno o dos números hay un villano para que se desencadenen escenas de acción, pero al final de cada enfrentamiento uno no tiene verdadera sensación de cierre, porque sigue pendiente saber qué pasa entre James-Michael y Omega.

Y esa incertidumbre tiñe todos estos tebeos, y por eso son diferentes a cualquier otro que lo acomparaña en los quioscos de 1976. James-Michael no se convierte en el sidekick de Omega: simplemente va viviendo su vida lidiando con lo que él cree que son ataques. Va al colegio, hace amigos, y sufre acoso escolar por parte de tres matones. Algo que dicho sea de paso provoca una de las situaciones más jodidas que he leído en un cómic de superhéroes, algo horrible de verdad.

omega2

Aunque en cada número siempre había algún momento para resumir qué había pasado hasta entonces en la serie, creo que debía de ser más difícil seguir el hilo sin haber leído todos. Omega the Unknown parecía saltarse muchas de las normas de accesibilidad que tenían los cómics entonces y Gerber y Skrenes van a lo suyo, construyendo una historia que no termina nunca, que dura diez números sin que se resuelva nada. Algo no sólo inédito en su momento, sino que tardó mucho en llegar. Incluso hoy no es habitual, aunque haya arcos argumentales realtivamente largos; en Omega da la sensación de que aquello no iba a terminar jamás.

Y aquí llego a lo mejor de todo. Porque sí terminó. Ya he dicho antes que la serie constó de diez números. Pero, claro, no fue porque fuera una serie limitada —aún quedaba lejos el concepto—, sino porque la falta de ventas acabó con ella. Y cuando esas cosas pasaban, normalmente los guionistas tenían dos opciones: o dejaban la puerta abierta para que el personaje siguiera pululando por el universo Marvel, o quemaban todo en un glorioso funeral vikingo. Casi nunca esto era decisión exclusiva del escritor, naturalmente, pero en este caso tengo la sensación de que les dejaron hacer. Al fin y al cabo, Omega no era un personaje con historia previa ni creo yo que nadie pensara que era aprovechable dentro de un universo Marvel en el que, en realidad, la serie se ubicaba por pura inercia de la editorial. Pero da lo mismo: lo que importa es que ese final abrupto y radical —ojo aquí: Omega muerto a tiros por la policía de Las Vegas y James-Michael descubriendo en su antigua casa unos robots de sus padres— que llega de golpe en la última página del número 10 convierte esta serie en algo memorable. Porque ese misterio que se iba construyendo número a número quedaba sin resolver para siempre jamás. Y a mí me ha recordado casi de inmediato otro final antológico motivado por la falta de público: el de Twin Peaks. Si el agente Cooper se quedó eternamente atrapado en la habitación roja, James-Michael sigue, cuarenta años después, congelado frente a los robots. Casi estoy tentado de imaginarme a unos jóvenes David Lynch y Mark Frost leyendo entusiasmados Omega the Unknown y quedando marcados por su final. Que no por impuesto deja de ser muy arriesgado, porque cuando uno decide no dar ningún respuesta a un misterio está doblando la apuesta. El lector siempre quiere saber, no puede evitarlo, y sigue paso a paso el desarrollo de un misterio porque espera impaciente su solución. Cuando, como aquí, se nos niega, el desconcierto, esa maravillosa sensación de vértigo ante el abismo de lo desconocido, puede fácilmente volverse cabreo por sentirse estafado. No es mi caso. Omega the Unknown me habría gustado igual con un final convencional, estoy razonablemente seguro de ello, pero si se ha convertido en un tebeo que recordaré toda la vida ha sido gracias a su conclusión. La historia de James-Michael, leo en Wikipedia, en realidad terminó en unos números de The Defenders escritos por Steve Grant. No me interesa leerlos. Ni siquiera me interesaría aunque fueran de Gerber o de Skrenes, que no tardaron en dejar de trabajar en la editorial, por otro lado. Nada de lo que se cuente o se pudiera haber contado me satisfaría tanto como la incertidumbre de esa locura en diez números, que en su ruptura de reglas y su órdago final se convierte, quizás, en la serie de Marvel más auténticamente moderna —¿posmoderna?— de los setenta.

18 Aug 10:16

Making Feet for Children's Shoes

by garciuh






This Is What The Rattlesnake "Combat Dance" Looks Like




An Incredible Close-Up View Of One Of The World's Most Venomous Spiders










This Worm is Truly, Deeply Terrifying











This Is What The Rattlesnake "Combat Dance" Looks Like



































This made me laugh




















The Shark Family's Weird Cousins That Live in the Deep Water




The Fastest Shark In The World Is Also An Incredible High Jumper

Two-Headed Dolphin Washes Ashore In Turkey, Current Whereabouts Unknown






THE END













image

Nicolas-Delort-Illustration-1




read more

18 Aug 10:11

Monday, August 18 @ 7:08:35 am

by deathbyejaculation
18 Aug 10:11

El pasado alegre de la segunda dama argentina

by Pinjed
El pasado alegre de la segunda dama argentina

Nos avisan por Twitter muy amablemente de algo llamativo relativo a la vida política argentina. Al parecer la mujer del vicepresidente de...

  
18 Aug 10:09

These go to 11

by Swollen Goods
18 Aug 09:49

There's Not Going to Be a Purge in Your Town

by Mike Pearl

Screencap via YouTube user Movieclips trailers

The first time I went to Snopes.com, I thought the internet would become the miracle cure for urban legends. I especially hated the outright lies, like the one about gang members going around with their car headlights off and shooting you if you flash them. I thought access to information would help the truth prevail. OK, you can stop laughing at me.

Now the kids think there are going to be real-life purges, and they’re spreading the notion via the Giant Lie Factory. Perhaps it's some last-minute marketing for The Purge: Anarchy, now playing in a theater near you. But it's almost certainly no coincidence that this hoax got started around the same time as the Ferguson protests. 

If you don’t read the taglines on movie billboards, a purge—as defined by the movie The Purge and its recent sequel—is a night on which everything is legal. The cops pack it in. Looters and murderers have a field day, and the audience has a good time. 

On Friday night, in real life, Louisville, Kentucky, lost its mind when kids there started tweeting about a Louisville purge, and the grown-ups believed what the kids were telling them—something you should never do.

They started shutting down businesses and locking themselves in their homes. Police went on high alert, because, according to the cops there, "We have to err on the side of caution, to keep our city safe.” 

You have to? Really? Even when what you’re preparing for, on the taxpayer's dime, is based on internet rumors that don’t even make sense when taken at face value?  

Next, purge hysteria escalated because people started saying one had happened. A Redditor posted what they claimed was photographic evidence of a Louisville purge. According to the post, someone let a giraffe out of the Louisville zoo. This was—are you sitting down?—a lie. The image was taken from a different news story in a different city, eight months ago. 

Also, we suggest that you guys stay safe if you go stalking because of purge threats in Detroit. Hopefully everything will be fine. -R

— Larry Updates (@1DLarryNews) August 16, 2014

Next, a vortex of stupidity took hold. One Direction were gearing up for a performance in Detroit Sunday night, and either because of it or in spite of it, people started tweeting about a Detroit Purge. Such an event might set the stage for a tragedy if One Direction were to be robbed and beheaded by a roving gang of masked psychopaths. 

By then the idea had caught fire, and it was everywhere. 

THE PURGE DATES* Spread This around if you see your city ✖️ Be safe pic.twitter.com/74EgVVpDM2

— VINE: ImJustinRay (@Imjustinray) August 16, 2014

Before long, there were people making up all kinds of stories about purges in every major city in America. Everyone gave themselves the rhetorical authority to tweet sensational nonsense by couching it in concern for others. Most tweets about Purges have the refrain “Be safe” tacked onto the end. 

I liked the movie The Purge but with everything it's caused, it wasn't worth making the movie. if you live in Louisville be safe!

— Shelby Waddell ✌ (@shelbyy512) August 16, 2014

Inevitably, with all these rumors swirling around, the idea of a St. Louis purge during the Ferguson protests was irresistible. It didn't happen. Ferguson got hit with a curfew, now in its second night. Looting wasn't exactly at an LA Riots level Saturday night, but just being outside was illegal. It was the exact opposite of The Purge.

But look, kids, there’s no purge coming to your town anyway. You 100 percent cannot just have a purge. Here's why:

Purges Are Impossible in the United States.

I'm going to take this seriously for a second.

No city or state in the US has the authority to declare a purge. If, hypothetically, the police intentionally backed off for a night, and the people who were the victims of crimes pressed charges afterward, but the bored receptionist at the police station was like, “Sorry your grandma was murdered, but nothing was illegal that night. Next!” they could just take their complaints to the state or federal level. It would be easy to argue, even though there’s no law that explicitly bans a jurisdiction from decriminalizing things like theft and murder. You would just use the always handy Ninth Amendment, which says you have rights not explicitly outlined in the constitution. It wouldn’t be hard to get a judge to agree that you have the unalienable right not to be murdered or robbed with the tacit approval of the local authorities. 

The purge in the movie was made possible by amending the constitution. I feel like I would remember reading about it if there had been a 28th Amendment that added purges to the fabric of our political system.

Rumors of Violent Flash Mobs Are Mostly Racist Hysteria.

If the people spreading this idea around don't actually think crime is going to be legal, and instead they think a "purge" is just the new name for one of those violent flash mobs they heard about on TV, I've got more good news: That shit doesn’t really happen. “Wilding” isn’t really a thing, except when followed by "out." The Central Park Five case, often cited as the quintessential example of young people running amok, didn’t happen like you think. Bad things happened that night, but accounts of events were tainted by racism and paranoia. 

People get in crowds sometimes, yes, and they lose their shit sometimes, yes. Ten unruly members of a peaceful crowd of 10,000 can cause the whole crowd to get blamed for a few stores being looted. Ferguson isn't the only case where something like this has happened. Cops tell stories to newscasters that further this "the world is going to hell in a handbasket" narrative because it keeps them in a job. Similarly, when a newscaster interviews Sylvester Stallone, he'll tell you it's a good idea to see The Expendables 3. That doesn't make it true. 

For instance, looking for an example of a "violent flashmob," I found an often cited story from 2011 in which 1,000 gang members were supposedly fighting on a beach in Boston. It turns out there were just a few fights, and the vast majority of the people in that crowd were just guilty of hanging around while being black or Hispanic. 

The Purge Is Just a Movie.

When I was 14, and the Columbine shooting had just happened, there were whispers in my school that the vast and powerful Trenchcoat Mafia would carry out a coordinated assault on every high school in America the following Friday. It was a dumb rumor in retrospect, but a really scary, non-movie thing had just happened in real life. I stayed home that Friday because, yes, I'm a coward, but there was an upside: I didn't want to go to school anyway, and I got a three-day weekend out of the deal. But as for the purge hoax, if you're a high schooler who responded to this movie-based rumor by locking yourself in your house during a weekend, that was dumb and a waste of a weekend.

Kids have wild imaginations. If you'd told me there was going to be a real-life Thunderdome, a real-life Logan's Runor a real-life Battle Royale, I would have been too excited not to spread the rumors. Adults, though, are supposed to know the difference between science fiction movies and stuff that can actually happen.

The small but significant pockets of misbehavior in Ferguson and elsewhere last week were no match for the enormous shows of force the law enforcement machine demonstrated (and will apparently always demonstrate when people start to get out of line). That's not to say we have law and order, just that, to compensate for the lack of law and order, there are sudden surges of violence from the cops that have become routine.

America has a lot of problems with violence in the streets, but the fact that much of that violence is committed by law enforcement should tell you that if you think there's a purge coming, you’re focusing your paranoia in the wrong direction.

Follow Mike Pearl on Twitter.

18 Aug 09:48

This Guy Wants to Help Every Woman Have a Squirting Orgasm

by Hannah Ewens

Steve Scrase

If there’s one thing we can all agree on, it’s that there’s never been enough in the way of clothing designed specifically for masturbation. There are things you can strap on or insert, sure, but nothing—according to the Google search I just did—that could feasibly pass as a normal item of clothing at, say, a job interview or funeral, while also doubling up as a convenient portable sex aid.

Thankfully, a man named Steve Scrase has come along to remedy that. His invention, the Glov, is—shockingly—a glove. However, this particular glove allows you to attach a dildo to the palm of your hand to achieve an easier “in and out motion,” as every other “self-penetration device on the market requires the user to hold and operate it in an unnatural and straining way.”

If you want to grab yourself one, they’re on Indiegogo.com for around $150. Before I did that myself, I thought I’d have a chat with Steve to get a few more details, and in the process I found out that he has big plans to help every woman in the world have a squirting orgasm.

A demonstration of how the Glov works

VICE: Hi, Steve. So have you always been interested in lady play?
Steve Scrase:
I’ve always been fascinated by human sexuality and how everyone experiences their own bliss in different ways. I’ve been in relationships where women use toys. I’m not that old school guy who goes, “My woman doesn’t need toys; she has me.” Hello! Wakey, wakey, boys. Whatever you can do to make your woman achieve that little bit extra, you better well damn do it.

So take me through what gave you the idea in the first place.
I’m very observational, so I would watch my girlfriend go through the process [with a traditional toy]. It seemed like you had to be a contortionist to be able to hold it. She’d get to the point of arousal, and she’d have to stop or slow down to be able to control it. Your body turns into a jellyfish, and you have no motor control anymore. You’re flopping around.

Right. So it’s the difficulty of using conventional sex toys that’s the problem?
Exactly. Think of all the places you’d use the traditional rabbit or sex toy. If you’re doing it in the shower, if you’re doing it doggy-style, if you’re lying on your back, if you’re on your side, it’s awkward, awkward, awkward! That’s when we thought, What if you could use the palm of your hand as a tripod and then use the third three fingers to flex the dildo? Second thing I noticed was that the controls are always at the farthest point away from the operator so you have to fumble around. So we put the controls on the back of the glove, so now your free hand has access to them without you having to miss a beat.

Was a glove the only thing you could come up with to allow for all that?
Yes, that was the only thing that made logical sense. It’s here to give you that little helping hand—no pun intended.

Do you believe the glove’s a game changer?
The wooden wheel had been around for thousands of years and no one had a problem with it. And then rubber came out. What happened? The wooden wheel went the way of the dinosaur. I’m not saying all sex toys will go the way of the dinosaur, but if things can be faster and you can have an easier ride…

So it’s for lazy women?
You think we’re helping lazy woman have an orgasm? I guess. But I don’t think that’s a bad thing, do you?

No, not at all. I imagine it’d be good for women with physical health problems too.
Absolutely. Our doctor told us that she deals with people with both physical and mental disabilities who have the sexual desire but not the physical capability. She said that this would help people who can’t actually hold a sex toy or reach in those areas. It’s an important area and definitely something that we will definitely branch into.

That's good to hear. The Glov looks a bit unsexy, though.
I’ve only had one person who said, "Can you make it a little bit more sexy?" We said, "What would you like us to do? Add some flowers or something?" Just picking the colors alone took us forever. We have some ideas to make it more feminine and sexy in the future. At the end of the day, I think people will be more concerned about their fulfillment than how it looks.

It seems quite big. I’m imagining finger-banging with one of those foam hands.
It’s actually not. It’s a little deceiving from the pictures. The glove is very thin; it’s just like a second skin, and it’s very flexible and snug on the hand. We make different sized devices too, as some women like it wider, narrower, longer. Once we’ve launched, we will have a new attachment every 60 days. They’re all easy to interchange on the fly.

Can you tell me about these attachments?
We have the Clitty-Cat, which is just for the clit, or massaging your nipples or wherever. It gets the blood flowing, as it were. And then there’s another one in the works. If the glove isn’t a home run, this is going to be a home-run grand slam. It’s a device specifically designed to give women squirting orgasms. We’ve got to do some more refinements to it, but we think we’ve got a winner. Over 90 percent of women can have a squirting orgasm, and it’s one of the most intense orgasms you can have. It’s something to be seen and experienced. I’ve said this multiple times: I wish I had a vagina. I would trade my penis in for a vagina just to have a squirting orgasm.

Bold. Have you had good feedback on the glove?
People don’t get it right away. You look at it and you’re like, "Hmm." It might look a little corny in the video. Maybe we shouldn’t have done it. But the response has been really positive. We’ve actually had a great response from the gay community. Imagine you’re a gay man: One hand’s on your Johnson; in the other hand you’ve got a dildo, and you’re trying to do the whole anal thing. It’s pretty difficult. Now take your hand and imagine you have a dildo on it. Now you’ve got one hand doing your Johnson, the other doing the "backdoor slide."

All this makes you seem like you’re a pretty selfless guy. Is that why you made the Glov?
I believe it is. I really truthfully believe the idea popped into my head because we’re supposed to take this to the next level. We’re using our success as a platform to help touch people—no pun intended—and show them that their sexuality can be fulfilled.

Thanks, Steve.

Follow Hannah Ewans on Twitter.