Shared posts

04 Jul 15:08

Comic for July 04, 2021

Dilbert readers - Please visit Dilbert.com to read this feature. Due to changes with our feeds, we are now making this RSS feed a link to Dilbert.com.
14 Jun 18:37

And F*** You, I'm Out!

In an email reminiscent of that one scene in Half Baked (warning: language) where Scarface quits his restaurant job, this worker pulled a similar tactic on his last day, lambasting all but eight of his coworkers on the company distro list. Will he see those eight people in the future? Nobody knows...

30 Nov 21:13

Times People Questioned Their Own Intelligence

Matt

LMFAO

Someone on AskReddit got a thread going about the most impressively dumb things people did that inspired them to question their own intelligence. Sometimes you lead a life where you worked 10 years in a kitchen, and still end up trying to microwave a saucepan. Or maybe you find yourself mindlessly blaring your car horn at the guy who you already knew was deaf, but somehow forgot because your brain decided to take a catnap. We've all been there caught up in the middle of an impressively mindless moment, at some point in our lives. 

22 Aug 16:06

How One Programmer Is Coding Faster By Voice Than Keyboard

by samzenpus
mikejuk writes "Is it possible that we have been wasting our time typing programs. Could voice recognition, with a little help from an invented spoken language, be the solution we didn't know we needed? About two years ago Tavis Rudd, developed a bad case of RSI caused by typing lots of code using Emacs. It was so severe that he couldn't code. As he puts it: 'Desperate, I tried voice recognition'. The Dragon Naturally Speaking system used by Rudd supported standard language quite well, but it wasn't adapted to program editing commands. The solution was to use a Python speech extension, DragonFly, to program custom commands. OK, so far so good, but ... the commands weren't quite what you might have expected. Instead of English words for commands he used short vocalizations — you have to hear it to believe it. Now programming sounds like a conversation with R2D2. The advantage is that it is faster and the recognition is easier — it also sounds very cool and very techie. it is claimed that the system is faster than typing. So much so that it is still in use after the RSI cleared up."

Share on Google+

Read more of this story at Slashdot.








22 Aug 12:38

Who Needs Buns?

happy meal,box,buns,funny

Submitted by: Unknown

Tagged: happy meal , box , buns , funny
21 Aug 17:22

Tom Hiddleston Singing Bare Necessities; Need I Say More?

21 Aug 17:21

Ford Trux: Built Polar Bear Tuff

by Brinke

Just ask Steve Kazlowski, the photographer who took these photos waaaay up in the Alaskan wilderness, and has been doing so for 15 years. He’ll tell ya- his truck can take it. (He’s in the photos, too- did he have a camera on a tripod? Or an assistant?) And remember the old joke- whadya give a huge polar bear to eat? Anything he wants!

9536180320_b50dc8b503_c

9533394503_2532df1915_c

9536180528_ab2a7dcee1_c

9536180902_5fb6c7844e_c

9533394701_13b89e3324_c

9533393605_97cd2f432f_c

9536180624_cd43cb246d_c

9533393823_07a17f1d71_c

9533394413_f9588e7b4d_c

9533394153_b1542f4a69_c

9533393375_c83c8b851b_c
Hats off to Mail Online, natch.


Filed under: Uncategorized Tagged: Polar Bears
21 Aug 14:05

Verse of the Day - 1 John 4:19

We love because he first loved us. — 1 John 4:19

Thoughts on Today's Verse...

We love others because God has first loved us. Our Heavenly Father taught us how to love in Jesus. Our Abba Father has given us security and confidence so we can love more fully. Our Holy and Almighty God loved us boldly and sacrificially so we could properly understand and define love. We are not the source of love: God is. We are not the great example of love: God is. We tend to be careful and share our love with only those with whom we want to share it: God's love is expansive and open to all. We love because he first loved us.

My Prayer...

Forgive me, Righteous Father, for the times that I have been careful and guarded with my love of your children. Please help me to love others as you have loved me. I ask especially for today, that I might touch someone's life with love that especially needs it whether they respond favorably to that love or not. In Jesus' name I pray. Amen.

The Thoughts and Prayer on Today's Verse are written by Phil Ware.

© 1998-2013, Heartlight, Inc. Verseoftheday.com is part of the Heartlight Network.
All scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION. © 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan Publishing House.

14 Aug 21:16

Has Anyone Seen My Rabbit?

by Unknown Lamer
New submitter geoskd writes "Scientists at the university of Hawaii have created glow in the dark rabbits. Where can I get my hands on one of these critters? It would drive the cats nuts! These guys are missing a bet, they could sell these things for big bucks and use the money to further fund their research. This is the perfect gift for the geek who has "everything"." The technique used is similar to the glow in the dark cats bred a couple of years ago. The fluorescence isn't the end goal of course; it just happens to be a very obvious marker that their genetic manipulation technique works. According to the researchers, "the final goal is to develop animals that act as barrier reactives to produce beneficial molecules in their milk that can be cheaply extracted, especially in countries that can not afford big pharma plants that make drugs, that usually cost $1bn to build, and be able to produce their own protein-based medication in animals."

Share on Google+

Read more of this story at Slashdot.








12 Aug 15:58

GarFEELS

GarFEELS

Submitted by: doniowa

Tagged: inner , feelings , garfield , funny , bacon
09 Aug 13:02

Relevant Experience: Yes

06 Aug 19:05

July 23, 2013

Matt

How true!


POW!
02 Aug 17:46

I Didn't Mean Call Him to Team Up With Me!

I Didn't Mean Call Him to Team Up With Me!

Submitted by: Unknown

Tagged: cosplay , retired , batman
02 Aug 17:14

Not Even Once

Not Even Once

Submitted by: Unknown

Tagged: bears , farts , funny , animals
18 Jul 16:17

So Demure

Matt

If only all EULAs were delivered in such a truthful manner!

10 Jul 14:14

Poor Hal

28 Jun 19:06

Until You Have to Get Out of the Trash

Submitted by: Unknown

Tagged: bear , teamwork , trash can , funny
27 Jun 19:43

32 Greatest Movie Scenes Of All Time

by Damn Cool Pics
Awesome unscripted movie scenes.

Gun vs. Sword
Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981)

Director - Steven Spielberg

While chasing Marion Ravenwood (Karen Allen) after she's been kidnapped, archaeologist and adventurer Dr. Indiana Jones (Harrison Ford) runs into a large sword-wielding bad guy dressed all in black. Instead of fighting him in what would surely be a losing whip versus sword battle, Indy simply pulls out his revolver, puts the man down with one shot and moves on.

The original script called for a long sword fight but a day earlier Ford got a severe case of food poisoning and didn't have the energy to film the scene as written. After a discussion with director Steven Spielberg, the scene was changed and became an iconic part of Indiana Jones mythos.




Why Male Models?
Zoolander (2001)

Director - Ben Stiller

In this scene involving former hand model J.P. Prewitt (David Duchovny) and the dimwitted male model Derek Zoolander (Ben Stiller), Prewitt - a conspiracy theorist - explains how the fashion industry has been behind every high profile political assassination of the last hundred years.

Zoolander asks, "Why male models?" Prewitt answers with a lengthy explanation, after which Zoolander responds again, "Why male models?" Stiller forgot his original line and just repeated his previous line instead. This prompted Duchovny to ad-lib his response "Are you kidding? I just told you like a minute ago."

The scene ends up reinforcing the movie's narrative of the brainless male model stereotype and Stiller turned a gaffe into one of the funniest parts of the film.




The Cat
The Godfather (1972)

Director - Francis Ford Coppola

Vito Corleone (Marlon Brando) is more than the cold-hearted head of a powerful Italian mob family. That trait shows when he sentences a man to be beaten as retaliation for the beating of another man's daughter - all while gently stroking a cat.

Thing is, the cat was never part of the original script. Some reports say that Coppola plopped the feline into Brando's lap just before filming began. Other reports say Brando found "il gatto" roaming around the set, picked him and gave him an offer he couldn't refuse (heh).




I Don't Care
The Fugitive (1993)

Director - Andrew Davis

In this famous showdown between Richard Kimble (Harrison Ford) - a doctor wrongly accused of murdering his wife - and U.S. Marshal Samuel Gerard (Tommy Lee Jones), Kimble gets the jump on Gerard in the sewers. Instead of shooting the Marshal and making things worse, Kimble pleads his case to him saying, "I didn't kill my wife!" Gerard, with a sober tone and intense look on his face, responds with a simple, but brilliant and ad-libbed, piece of dialog, "I don't care."

The line wasn't part of the script but those three words reinforced to Kimble, and audiences, that it didn't matter to Gerard whether the doctor was guilty or innocent of the crimes for which he was accused. He was going to get his man - no matter what.




Slow Clapping
The Dark Knight (2008)

Director - Christopher Nolan

As the Joker (Heath Ledger) waits quietly alone in jail after having been arrested by Jim Gordon (Gary Oldman), Mayor Garcia (Nestor Carbonell) shows up to look over Gotham's latest scourge. While there he also promotes Gordon to the position of Commissioner.

As the officers in the room applaud the announcement Ledger begins, unscripted, to slowly clap - never changing his facial expression. It was just a simple improvisation but one that was unsettling and darkly brilliant.




Spitting Blood
RoboCop (1987)

Director - Paul Verhoeven

When antagonist Clarence Boddicker (Kurtwood Smith) is taken to the police precinct after receiving a solid whooping by RoboCop (Peter Weller), Boddicker spits a bloody glob onto the paperwork of the desk sergeant, followed by the line "Give me my f*ckin' phone call!"

Smith and Verhoeven briefly had discussed the unscripted moment before filming the scene but neglected to inform the extras - which was evident by their real and disgusted surprise as the scene unfolded.




Necklace Laugh
Pretty Woman (1990)

Director - Garry Marshall

In what became one of the most famous scenes from the film, Edward Lewis (Richard Gere) presents call girl Vivian Ward (Julia Roberts) with a gorgeous and rather expensive diamond necklace. As Roberts reaches out to touch the precious jewels, Gere - in an unscripted playful moment - quickly snaps the box shut genuinely surprising her.

Her laugh was so honest, and the scene so good, that Marshall decided to leave it in the film as is.




Think Fast!
Being John Malkovich (1999)

Director - Spike Jonze

Shortly after John Malkovich meets Craig Schwartz (John Cusack) on the side of the road he wanders off mad. As he does, a car passes by with a man leaning out the window. The man throws a can hitting Malkovich square in the back of the head while yelling, "Hey Malkovich! Think Fast!" - causing the Oscar nominated actor to scream out in legitimate pain.

Neither the can throwing nor the reaction were scripted but the drunken extra in the car felt the opportunity was too good to pass up. Jonze thought the scene added to the character's frustration and left it in.

Instead of being fired, the extra was added to the final cut of the film and given a raise.




The Cinderella Story
Caddyshack (1980)

Director - Harold Ramis

One of the best and most quoted scenes from this film is "The Cinderella Story" where groundskeeper Carl Spackler (Bill Murray) mutters a story to himself about an unknown golfer winning The Masters.

This entire scene was developed by Murray on the spot saying in his 1999 book Cinderella Story: My Life in Golf: "The Cinderella Story was a spur-of-the-moment idea. 'Get me some flowers,' I said. 'Four rows of mums."




Most Annoying Sound in the World
Dumb and Dumber (1994)

Director - Farrelly Brothers

There are many scenes in the film that show how moronic and simple-minded best friends Lloyd Christmas (Jim Carrey) and Harry Dunne (Jeff Daniels) can be but this one showed how annoying they can be on car trips - and it was entirely unscripted.

Even hitman Joe Mentalino's (Mike Starr) hissy fit reaction to the scene was unscripted, which makes the scene that much funnier.




Know How I Know You're Gay?
Knocked Up (2007)

Director - Judd Apatow

Crafting a good and funny insult is one of the hardest things to do but Seth Rogen and Paul Rudd are two of the best - proving it in this scene of put down jokes.

This entire exchange between Pete (Rudd) and Ben (Rogen) while in the car was completely ad libbed by the two actors. The scene is only a few seconds long on the final cut but as an extra on the DVD, the scene goes on for over six minutes.




Farting Wife
Good Will Hunting (1997)

Director - Gus Van Sant

In this scene between therapist Sean Maguire (Robin Williams) and math genius Will Hunting (Matt Damon), Williams proves that comedic-minded actors usually give the best ad libbed scenes.

The entire story about Maguire's flatulent spouse was made up on the spot by Williams and not a part of the original script.




Delayed Explosion
The Dark Knight (2008)

Director - Christopher Nolan

Originally, the Joker (Heath Ledger) was supposed to walk down the street while the explosion at the hospital began, get on the school bus during the scripted pause, and the bus would drive away while the explosion finished.

However, Ledger stopped walking during the pause and in a moment of improvisation began fidgeting with the remote detonator in a very Joker-esque manner - bringing a slight amount of dark humor to what would have just been a serious scene.




Game Over Man
Aliens (1986)

Director - James Cameron

Chaos and confusion are everywhere after the first attack by the xenomorphs decimate the Space Marines and their drop ship crashes. As the crew tries to get their bearing and fully understand what just happened, Private Hudson (Bill Paxton) - ever the pessimist - laments "That's it man, game over man, game over! What are we going to do now?"

The original line didn't include the "game over" part and was ad libbed by Paxton.




Party Talk
Tootsie (1982)

Director - Sydney Pollack

During this scene, aspiring playwright Jeff Slater (Bill Murray) was required to appear to be talking throughout the entire party; however, there was no dialog written for the character.

As a natural entertainer and comedian, Murray improvised the entire scene.




The Line Up
The Usual Suspects (1995)

Director - Bryan Singer

Christopher McQuarrie wrote only one line for this scene - "Give me the keys, you f*cking c*cksucker!" - it was up to the individual actors to deliver it however they wanted. McQuarrie actually plays the cop speaking with the suspects and both his line to Fred Fenster (Benicio Del Toro) "In English please?" and Del Toro's reaction were unscripted.

According to interviews on the DVD, the laughing during Del Toro's delivery was due to his constant farting while filming - boys will be boys.




Come Out to Play
The Warriors (1979)

Director - Walter Hill

In this scene, the script called for Luther (David Patrick Kelly) - leader of the vicious New York gang the Rogues - to drive up and provoke rival gang The Warriors to a fight in the streets by clinking bottles together.

Kelly spontaneously added the now famous line "Warriors, come out to play!”




Take the Cannoli
The Godfather (1972)

Director - Francis Ford Coppala

Corleone family capo Peter Clemenza (Richard Castellano) orders his henchman Rocco Lampone (Tom Rosqui) to carry out a hit on Paulie Gatto (John Martino) for his betrayal of Don Vito Corleone (Marlon Brando).

Castellano's original line was "Leave the gun" but drawing from an earlier scene where Clemenza's wife reminds him to bring home some cannoli, he improvised the now famous line "Take the cannoli."




Mein Furher, I Can Walk
Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb (1964)

Director - Stanley Kubrick

Nuclear scientist Dr. Merkwürdigliebe or Strangelove (Peter Sellers) was confined to a wheelchair for the entire film - but Sellers decided to spontaneously stand at the very end of the film, take a couple of steps and proclaim, "Mein Führer! I can walk!"

In a process known as "retroscripting", Kubrick changed much of the script he co-wrote with Terry Southern to incorporate much of Sellers' improvised dialog, including this now famously unscripted scene from the end of his black satirical comedy.




Remembering the Brothers
Saving Private Ryan (1998)

Director - Steven Spielberg

During a brief break from fighting, Captain Miller (Tom Hanks) sits with Private Ryan (Matt Damon) swapping stories about what it was like back home for them both. The story Damon tells about his brothers and the barn was made up entirely by him during filming.

None of the story was part of the original script.




You're Gonna Need a Bigger Boat
Jaws (1975)

Director - Steven Spielberg

While chumming the waters in an attempt to lure the deadly great white shark within range, Police Chief Brody (Roy Scheider) gets his first look at exactly how massive the killer shark truly is.

Stunned, startled and filled with fear he stands up and utters the now famous line to Orca Captain Quint (Robert Shaw) completely off-script, "You're going to need a bigger boat.”

Turns out, he was right.




I Know
Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back (1980)

Director - Irvin Kershner

As smuggler-turned-hero Han Solo (Harrison Ford) is about to be encased in carbonite, Princess Leia (Carrie Fisher) reveals her love for him. The script called for Leia to say "I love you" to which Solo was supposed to respond with "I love you too".

Ford decided that Solo wouldn't say something like that and instead, changed the line to simply "I know."




Can You Hear Me Now?
Reservoir Dogs (1992)

Director - Quentin Tarantino

The script for Tarantino's violent, freshman project called for jewel thief Mr. Blonde (Michael Madsen) to torture Officer Nash (Kirk Baltz) by cutting off his ear with a straight razor - however, Tarantino didn't give Madsen any specific direction what to do once the gruesome deed had been done.

All of Madsen's lines and actions with the ear were improvised by him.




Here's Looking at You Kid
Casablanca (1942)

Director - Michael Curtiz

The scene of Rick Blaine (Humphrey Bogart) putting Ilsa Lund (Ingrid Bergman) and Victor Laszlo (Paul Henreid) on a plane bound for America with the help of Captain Louis Renault (Claude Rains) is chock full of memorable lines but the line listed as 5th in AFI's 100 Years...100 Movie Quotes wasn't even part of the original script.

According to reports, Bogart said the phrase "Here's looking at you kid" multiple times to Bergman while teaching her to play poker between takes.




The Sneeze
Annie Hall (1977)

Director - Woody Allen

Neurotic Jewish comedian Alvy Singer (Woody Allen) is at a party when his friend passes him a small tin filled with cocaine. As Alvy takes the tin in his hands he has a violent sneeze - sending white powder everywhere. The surrounding actors’ uncontrollable laughter was spontaneous and genuine and Allen decided to leave it in the final cut of the film after it tested well with audiences.

So one of the most famous sneezes in cinema history was never actually intended to be part of the final film - it actually occurred during a scene rehearsal.




Here's Johnny!
The Shining (1980)

Director - Stanley Kubrick

Wendy Torrance (Shelley Duval) and her son Danny (Danny Lloyd) hide from the deranged novelist Jack Torrance (Jack Nicholson) in a hotel bathroom. As Jack begins chopping through the door with a fire axe and sticks his face into the splintered opening, he utters a phrase previously made popular by Ed McMahon on The Tonight Show starring Johnny Carson - "Here's Johnny!"

The line was not part of Kubrick's original screenplay and was improvised by Nicholson.




Like Tears in the Rain
Blade Runner (1982)

Director - Ridley Scott

As ex-blade runner Rick Deckard (Harrison Ford) attempts to "retire" the replicant known as Roy Batty (Rutger Hauer), he finds himself in a precarious position. The battle worn replicant shows mercy on Deckard rescuing him from the edge of the building - only to "die" shortly after giving a moving monologue.

As he reminisces about his past he says, "All those moments will be lost in time...," but then Hauer adds the unscripted and philosophical phrase "...like tears in rain."




I'm Walking Here!
Midnight Cowboy (1969)

Director - John Schlesinger

As want-to-be gigolo Joe Buck (Jon Voight) and crippled scam artist Ratso (Dustin Hoffman) cross a street in New York City, a REAL NYC taxi cab driver who ignored all the "Street Closed for Filming" signs drives through the scene.

Obviously this wasn't scripted and Hoffman's response and actions were all improvised, in character, as a result.




Singing in the Rain
A Clockwork Orange (1971)

Director - Stanley Kubrick

Alex (Malcolm McDowell) breaks into a happy song as he and his "droogs" perform a bit of "ultra-violence" and rape. Reportedly Kubrick filmed this scene several times and wasn't happy with it each time - until he told McDowell to just "do anything he wanted".

McDowell decided to belt out "Singing in the Rain" and Kubrick was so pleased with how much better the scene became that he acquired the rights to use the song immediately.




You Talking to Me?
Taxi Driver (1976)

Director - Martin Scorsese

When screenwriter Paul Schrader wrote this scene it simply said "Travis talks to himself in the mirror" - there was no specific dialog given. Everything that insomnia-plagued taxi driver Travis Bickle (Robert De Niro) says during his faux-conversation was improvised by De Niro on the spot.

To this day, whenever someone walks by a mirror they can't help but utter his now famous line "You talking to me?"




Hsssss!
The Silence of the Lambs (1991)

Director - Jonathan Demme

The famous "hssssss" sound made by Dr. Hannibal Lecter (Anthony Hopkins) during his story about eating a liver with "fava beans and a nice Chianti" to FBI agent Clarice Starling (Jodie Foster) wasn't in the original script.

Apparently it was something Hopkins did during rehearsals to creep out Foster - and Demme decided leaving it in was the best way to creep out his audience too.




Drill Sergeant
Full Metal Jacket (1987)

Director - Stanley Kubrick

Originally, R. Lee Ermey wasn't even cast in the role as Gunnery Sergeant Hartman but after Ermey submitted a tape of himself spewing insults at group of Royal Marines for 15 minutes straight, Kubrick cast him immediately

Ermey wrote 150 pages of insults and Kubrick estimated that 50% of the character’s dialog was improvised by the former drill instructor.


Via: screenrant
27 Jun 17:22

Netflix Ditches Silverlight With HTML5 Support In IE11

by timothy
An anonymous reader writes "Netflix today announced that it has finally taken the first step towards ditching Silverlight for HTML5, largely thanks to Microsoft, no less. The company has been working closely with the Internet Explorer team to implement its proposed 'Premium Video Extensions' in IE11 on Windows 8.1, meaning if you install the operating system preview released today, you can watch Netflix content using HTML5 right now. Back in April, Netflix revealed its plans to use HTML5 video in any browser that implements its proposed 'Premium Video Extensions.' These extensions allow playback of premium video (read: with DRM protection) directly in the browser without the need to install plugins such as Silverlight or Flash."

Share on Google+

Read more of this story at Slashdot.



27 Jun 13:44

How-To: 3D Print a Model of your Brain

by Michael Colombo
woVYRRjhTake those MRI slices and stack them back together to build your brain.

Read more on MAKE

25 Jun 14:01

Comic for June 25, 2013

Matt

For my former coworkers.

Dilbert readers - Please visit Dilbert.com to read this feature. Due to changes with our feeds, we are now making this RSS feed a link to Dilbert.com.
10 Jun 20:10

I See an Unpaid Internship in Your Future

Matt

Seen way too many contractors & interns get treated this way over the years.

internship,jim benton,butts,toilet

Submitted by: (via Jim Benton)