Listen. I say the following with a pristine record of support for unhealthful dairy-based coating glops—both as a genre of foodstuffs and in most specific instances—as well as with the firm backing of all available science: Ranch dressing is bad. Bad dressing.
WASHINGTON—Claiming that his operation would be “completely dicked over” by an influx of product, Vice President Joe Biden reportedly became increasingly worried this week that the recent legalization of marijuana in Washington, D.C.
Fast food chain Burger King has quietly dropped sodas and other sugary beverages from children’s menus and replaced them with low-fat milk and low-fat chocolate milk.
This metaphorical explanation of the post-2008 Irish banking crisis works equally well as an explanation for contemporary global financial markets in general.
Mary is the proprietor of a bar in Dublin. She realises that virtually all of her customers are unemployed alcoholics and, as such, can no longer afford to patronise her bar -- she will go broke.
To solve this problem, she comes up with a new marketing plan that allows her customers to drink now, but pay later.
She keeps track of the drinks consumed on a ledger (thereby granting the customers loans).
Word gets around about Mary's 'drink now, pay later' marketing strategy and, as a result, increasing numbers of customers flood into Mary's bar.
Soon she has the largest sales volume for any bar in Dublin -- all is starting to look rosy.
By providing her customers freedom from immediate payment demands Mary gets no resistance when, at regular intervals, she substantially increases her prices for wine and beer, the most consumed beverages.
A young and dynamic vice-president at the local bank recognises that these customer debts constitute valuable future assets and increases Mary's borrowing limit.
He sees no reason for any undue concern, since he has the debts of the unemployed alcoholics as collateral.
At the bank's corporate headquarters, expert traders figure a way to make huge commissions, and transform these customer loans into Drinkbonds and Alkibonds. These securities are then bundled and traded on international security markets.
The new investors don't really understand that the securities being sold to them as 'AAA' secured bonds are really the debts of unemployed alcoholics. They have had a 'rating house' certify they are of good quality.
This year's Oscar nominations for Best Original Score did the field few favors, overlooking some significant work. Jonny Greenwood, increasingly known as much for his film music as for his contributions to Radiohead, has yet to be acknowledged by the Academy, despite his idiosyncratic, imaginative collaborations with the director Paul Thomas Anderson, most recently in "Inherent Vice." Jason Moran deserved a nod for his "Selma" score, which oscillates between subdued moods of hope and dread, avoiding the telltale gestures of the great-man bio-pic. (The Aaron Copland trumpet of lonely American power is in abeyance.) Most baffling was the omission of Mica Levi's score for "Under the Skin," which, like Greenwood's work for Anderson, moves from seething dissonance to eerie simplicity and back again.
I listen to movie soundtracks quite a bit; they're good to play while working. Here are a few I've enjoyed from 2014:
Lebanese host Rima Karaki was interviewing Islamic sheik Hani Al Sibai last week on Al-Jadeed TV about why some Christians would want to join ISIS.
When he started to drag on, she interrupted him to keep the conversation moving, but he was not pleased at being told what to do.
“Listen, don’t cut me off,” he said. “I will answer as I please.”
She politely warns him that they are running out of time, and he rudely tells her to “shut up,” and that it is “beneath” him to be interviewed by her.
Eventually she just cut his mic to put a stop to it.
“Had I not answered, I would have hated myself, and I don’t want to hate myself,” she told The Guardian. “When he said shut up, it was no longer possible to shut up because I would be insulting myself and would lose everything.”
The confrontation between the two has since gone viral, and Sibai is demanding an apology from the network.
The video now has over 5 million views, and Karaki is getting lots of support from viewers on Twitter.
It felt like you were speaking for all of us, thank you for not settling. I'm excited to see more women take your lead. @KarakiRima x
The results of the 2015 GIFYS from CP+B were announced on Thursday, and President Barack Obama took home the biggest prize: GIF of The Year.
The clip, which originally appeared on Leno, shows Obama arriving at the 2012 Nuclear Security Summit in South Korea on a skateboard.
This is the second year of the competition which honors the best of what the Internet has to offer in small doses. Last year Oprah won top prize with this “Bees” gif.
Anyone can submit GIFs for consideration, and a panel of “experts” from various online news organizations chooses the nominees. The public then votes on the winners in each category like “Cats,” “Sports,” and “Weird.”
IKEA has unveiled a new set of furniture called “Home Smart” which will charge your phone just by placing it on the surface.
The tables, lamps and desks contain a charging pad that uses Qi’s energy induction transfer technology, the global standard from the Wireless Power Consortium.
Each will need to be plugged into a power source, but the phones themselves do not.
“People hate cable mess. They worry about not finding the charger and running out of power,” said Ikea rep Jeanette Skjelmose. “Our new innovative solutions, which integrate wireless charging into home furnishings, will make life at home simpler.”
Qi is already installed in 3,000 hotels, restaurants, airports and public locations around the world according to the press release, and it works with over 80 compatible smartphones. For iPhones and some Samsung phones you’ll need to buy a special charging cover, according to Engadget.
The new IKEA pieces will be available starting this April in the U.S. and U.K, and the company will sell standalone chargers as well.
WASHINGTON—Muttering softly under his breath as he leaned his head against the tiled bathroom wall, President Barack Obama repeatedly reminded himself that he was not his job over the course of a 15-minute shower Friday morning, White House sources ...
MILWAUKEE—Noting that his income level does not necessitate sharing a single kitchen and bathroom with two other grown men, sources confirmed Wednesday that local 32-year-old Josh Redmayne must be living with roommates completely by choice at this p...
WASHINGTON—Calling it an unprecedented finding that fundamentally reshapes how humankind views its place in the universe, astronomers from NASA announced Wednesday the discovery of a planet that makes Earth look like absolute shit. The space agency...
If you take the vocals from The Perfect Drug by Nine Inch Nails and match them to the beats from Taylor Swift's Shake It Off, you get this little bit of magic:
I was looking for more information on the Mt. Airy Lodge, and found this INCREDIBLE home video from 1992 made by some family and it is absolutely amazing. Come for the tour of the bathroom, stay for the lounge singer’s/keyboardists’ hair dos. It is a real time capsule.
In Skilling we trust! [ 
Emanuel failed to gain the votes necessary to avoid a runoff, despite overwhelming fundraising, advertising and endorsement advantages. [ more › ]
WTF, Wisconsin? [ 