Bridget

All photos by Aditya Pamidi

Back in 1977, a dude named Xavier Roberts stole artist Martha Nelson Thomas's designs and turned his art degree and penchant for soft sculpture into a brilliant money-making scheme: chubby-cheeked, creepy-eyed plush dolls. Originally hawked as "Little People," with an "adoption fee" around $40, Roberts soon changed their name; Cabbage Patch Kids went on to enjoy immense popularity in the 80s. In 1985, America rallied as a nation to pull off something extremely important: sending one of these dolls—specifically one named Christopher Xavier—into fucking outer space. Why not!

It was important to the Cabbage Patch backstory that these wholesome toys couldn't come into our mortal world by the vaginal canal. All Cabbage Patch Kids are delivered in a weird-ass vestibule: BabyLand General Hospital in Cleveland, Georgia, a place where people can come and witness a "live birth."

Cleveland isn't known for much. It has a vaguely charming downtown area, and it's close to the mountains, but that's about it. As such, it isn't hard to miss BabyLand. The doll hospital sits proudly at the top of a rolling, well-manicured hill. It looks, as my photographer eloquently offered, "like some fucking legit plantation mansion. Gone with the Wind shit." He wasn't wrong. An ivory porch wraps around the building, with roomy rocking chairs and sturdy, overcompensating columns. Ethereal children's voices sing over piped music from the porch out into the expansive parking lot—which, to my surprise, was pretty full.

In a way, the idea of hyperstimulated kids choosing " vinyl-faced dolls" with vacant expressions slicked across their doughy cheeks and plastic marble eyes over iPads seemed charming. Children are still independently interested in Cabbage Patch Kids, as evidenced by the enormous swarm present at Babyland on a random July Saturday afternoon. There's also this video.

BabyLand is less a theme park or an "experience" than a toy store on steroids. The lobby is white and sterile, keeping true to the hospital vibe. The staff rocks scrubs of various pastel varieties, flitting in and out of the opening area. Glass cases line the walls with physical evidence of the Cabbage Patch Kid's "natural progression." Non-white Cabbage Patch Kids didn't show up until much, much later down the IRL timeline. Another visitor, a large gruff man, muttered sincerely to his child, "I'm sorry we couldn't find one with the Dixie flag." Welcome to BabyLand.

During our visit, we caught three Cabbage Patch births. Not entirely impressive, considering the fact that "Mother Cabbage" gives birth "several times a day," as one young man in green scrubs explained. He was the OB GYN on duty, apparently, and barely out of high school. The young man requested not to be identified, so we'll call him Adam.

Adam moved jovially throughout BabyLand's innards: crates of stuffed baby dolls up for adoption (starting around $60), endless accessories (including diapers and bibs), weird candy (who knows why), and just heaps and heaps of junk. His enthusiasm was palpable and, as far as I could tell, genuine. Adam later revealed he'd been "delivering" at BabyLand for just three months, following a tip from his FFA sponsor.

Loudspeaker announcements boomed manic reminders of the upcoming birth. Swarms of large, sunburnt families pooled at the base of Mother Cabbage. She stands tall and proud like an animatronic nightmare, fat roots sprawled to the ground with her branches spraying outward and holding tiny, twinkling "Bunnybees." The infants nestled in their individual cabbage bases occasionally twitch mechanically, to mimic life. It's upsetting.

But we're gathered to celebrate new life! Adam begins the operation while guiding the group through a series of slick punchlines like "Mother Cabbage is dilated ten leaves!" Adam hooks the tree up with "imagicilin," something bubbling in an IV bag, and performs a procedure called an "easy-o-tomy."

Then, he asks the audience which sex they'd prefer today. Following a shouting contest, he illuminates a sonogram in Mother Cabbage's trunk. And that's how little baby Gatlin Carter came into this world, feigned umbilical cord cut and all.

It isn't exclusively children huddled around Adam and the freshly swaddled cloth baby. Lots of older women and a few grown men coo gently, apparently here by themselves.

I find a bored-looking nurse and ask what her deal is. Why does she work here? This nurse is responsible for controlling the BabyLand Facebook page. She explains that she's from Cleveland and BabyLand is sort of it. There aren't many more options around beyond donning a set of scrubs and shuffling around inside the retail wonderland. Steady streams of people roll through the place year-round, ranging from families to tour buses of senior citizens to the highly-esteemed members of the Collector's Club. Plus, she added, "Look at them. Look at these faces." She had a point. There was a lot of joy hanging around.

It's easy to rip on a place like BabyLand because it is, by definition, ridiculous. Packed to the gills with cheaply-made wares marked up 300 or 400 percent, the doll hospital is ethereal and opportunistic and absurd. But a quick 360 echoed the nurse's point: people were stoked to be there. And the fact that kids raised on iPads could still get excited about a bunch of IRL dollies can only be a good thing.

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Have ears and an internet connection? Then tune in to VICE on BEATS1, featuring talk segments and fresh tracks inspired by the world of VICE, at 10 AM and 9 PM EST.

This week's episode features the world premiere of DonMonique's "Fifty Kay ft. Noah Caine." Her brand new Thirst Trap EP will drop on Noisey this Monday. VICE will also play a mix of the music we're loving this week featuring new tracks from Chief Keef, Sophie, Young Fathers, Fekky, and more.

Then we'll travel to Havana, Cuba with VICE Director of Photography Jake Burghart to discover the music he found while shooting there. We'll also be talking with Def Jam's Russell Simmons and Rick Rubin about some of the label's most influential hits. Finally, we'll pay tribute to Nick Cave's Noisey performance at NYC Town Hall.

Last month, Hudson Mohawke released the music video for “Warriors”, a highlight off his impressive sophomore LP, Lantern. Today, the Glasgow native has let loose a new set of visuals for the track, a short film starring Pusha T. Directed by Eric Yue, the shadowy, four-minute clip sees The Clipse MC play the “titular warrior escaping authorities in a not-too-distant future.” Watch below.

Additionally, the TNGHT producer has mapped out a new batch of US tour dates behind Lantern. The trek starts in October and features special guest R&B singer The-Dream.

Hudson Mohawke 2015 Tour Dates:
07/26 – Nigata, JP @ Fuji Rock
07/28 – Seoul, KR @ Rolling Hall
07/31 – Toronto, ON @ The Hoxton
08/01 – Montreal, QC @ Osheaga Festival
08/02 – Pomona, CA @ Hard Summer
08/15 – Gothenburg, SE @ Way Out West Festival
08/20 – Hasselt, BE @ Pukkelpop
08/21 – Marseille, FR @ Le Dock Des Suds
08/28 – Leeds, UK @ Leeds Festival
08/30 – Reading, UK @ Reading Festival
09/12 – Downend, UK @ Bestival
09/26 – Reims, FR @ Elektricity Festival
10/13 – Portland, OR @ Hawthorne Theatre *
10/14 – Seattle, WA @ The Crocodile *
10/15 – Vancouver, BC @ Celebrities *
10/17 – San Francisco, CA @ Treasure Island
10/31 – Paris, FR @ Pitchfork Music Festival
11/06 – Austin, TX @ Fun Fun Fun Fest
11/07 – Dallas, TX @ Southside Ballroom *
11/10 – Nashville, TN @ Exit/In *
11/12 – Detroit, MI @ St. Andrews Hall *
11/14 – Burlington, VT @ Artsriot *
11/15 – Boston, MA @ Paradise Rock Club *
11/17 – Philadelphia, PA @ Theatre of Living Arts *
11/18 – New York, NY @ Webster Hall *
12/10 – London, UK @ Roundhouse

* = w/ The-Dream

Over the weekend, Mohawke debuted his Beats 1 radio show. The hour-long program included previously unreleased material from TNGHT, Le1f and TNGHT’s Lunice, and EPROM.

Dieter Moebius, the German/Swiss electronic and Krautrock experimentalist who co-founded Harmonia and Cluster, died Monday at the age of 71.  Though the cause of death is currently unknown, the news was confirmed via Facebook by his bandmates Michael Rother (who played in Harmonia as well as Neu!) and Hans-Joachim Roedelius (of both Cluster and Harmonia).

Moebius met Roedelius and Conrad Schnitzler (of Tangerine Dream) while studying art in Berlin in 1969. They formed Kluster, and when Schntizler left, changed the spelling to Cluster. In 1973, the duo relocated to rural Forst in Germany and were joined by Rother, who was on break from Neu! Together, the trio formed Harmonia, whom Brian Eno once called the “world’s most important rock band.” Eno spent 11 days with the group in Frost recording what eventually became Tracks and Traces, an album not released until 1997. Eno and Cluster went on to collaborate on 1978’s Cluster and Eno and 1979’s After the Heat.

Moebius would also go on to have a prolific career of solo and collaborative works, releasing a total of 17 albums credited to his name in one form or another. The most recent was 2014’s Nidemonex.

Below, read Roedelius and Rother’s notes marking Moebius’ passing, followed by some highlights from his illustrious career.

On Saturday, North Carolina's Loyal White Knights of the Ku Klux Klan took to the steps of the South Carolina Statehouse to protest the state legislature and governor's decision to remove the Confederate battle flag that has flown outside the building since the 1960s.

It wasn't pretty. From taunting black people in the crowd with offensive body language to issuing racial insults and mutual threats of violence, South Carolina would have been better off had the event never happened.

But even amid the ugliness, many showed extreme restraint and conscientiousness — including South Carolina Director of Public Safety Leroy Smith. Read More

There’s nothing like seeing the ball casually bounce, forcing everyone to miss their shots, and perfectly timing a boost to nudge it into the goal. Friends, Rocket League is fun as hell.

Read more...

via http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m3juacLMJm1qld79mo1_500.png

Run the Jewels, the rap superduo consisting of Killer Mike and El-P, have spent months promising Meow the Jewels, a forthcoming version of their Run the Jewels 2 album as interpreted by cats.

Read more...

Thievery Corporation has announced via Facebook: "Proud to announce that we will be playing at The Greek Theatre in Los Angeles on October 2nd with Cypress Hill!" Tickets for this all-ages show will go on sale this Friday, July 24,...

nuppababii:

Exactly.

Jon Stewart Destroys Donald Trump - ‘Our First Openly Asshole President’’

popculturebrain:

New photos: ‘Deadpool’ | Heroic Hollywood

I see that ‘Rent’ shirt Mr. Pool.

A decomposing body found in an SUV led police to uncover a massive stockpile of guns and ammo inside of an upscale Westside home. [ more › ]

Love letters. Tattoos. Sext messages. All valid and romantic ways to let them know you care. But none are as unique as a pendant engraved with the sound waves produced when you tell them. Click here and enter to win your choice of Vertical or Horizontal White or Yellow gold Soundwave Pendant custom engraved with a personal voice message from Soundwave Art! A $600 value!

This giveaway is open to US residents only.

About Soundwave Pendants

Record a message you want a loved one (or yourself) to remember--professions of passion, wedding vows, words of encouragement, even a baby's heartbeat--and Soundwave Art will extract the unique sound waves your voice generates and engrave them on your choice of a Vertical or Horizontal Pendant from their new collection. Recordings are made directly from the company's purchase pages, and both pendants come in a choice of 14K Yellow or White Gold.

The Soundwave Pendant giveaway winner will be able to select one of the above combinations and have it engraved with a personal message. Check out the Soundwave online store to review your options. Read on to learn more above the art of the visualized human voice.

Sounds consist of a series of compression and rarefaction waves traveling through a medium. In other words, when someone speaks or, say, uses a chainsaw, they are creating areas of high (compression) and low (rarefaction) pressure, pushing air molecules around and creating waves. When the waves hit our eardrums they vibrate, resonate, and translate through our bones and brains so we understand what we are hearing. Even cooler, every voice and sound is singular to its producer, so no two sets of waves are ever identical. And transferring these spikes and dips and subtle nuances to a visual medium results in completely one of a kind pieces of art. Voice Art.

For more information on the voice recording and printing processes, head over to Soundwave Art's FAQ page.

Soundwave Pendant Giveaway Entry Instructions

To register, click here and fill out the Soundwave Personal Voice Message Pendants Giveaway entry form. Or, if you're already a member of DudeIWantThat.com, when the magic entry form button appears, just click it to enter.

Giveaway prize includes: 1 x Soundwave Vertical or Horizontal Pendant in 14K Yellow or White Gold. Winner will be able to record desired personal message for engraving. Retail value is $600.

The Soundwave Pendant Giveaway entry period is open through 11:59 p.m. ET on Sunday, July 26, 2015. Our drawn winner will be contacted by email within 48 hours of the entry period's conclusion, and will have 12 hours to respond and claim his/her prize. (Should we not hear back from a drawn winner in the specified time period, a new winner will be drawn and contacted.) Winners should allow 3 weeks for ring fabrication, plus delivery time.

Once a winner is drawn and confirmed, s/he will be announced below.

This giveaway is open to US residents only.

Get a Soundwave Pendant Now

The perfect gift is just a click away. Peruse Soundwave Art's full collection of engraved voice pendants here. Vertical and Horizontal pendants are also made in sterling silver and sell for $149.99. In addition, buyers can find Heart and Circular pendants starting at $159.99 and $179.99 in the Soundwave online store.

If you're more into finger decor, you might remember Dude's previous collaboration with Soundwave on a Personal Voice Message Ring giveaway. Check out their full ring selection, in bands ranging from Titanium to Black Zirconium to Carbon Fiber here.

Soundwave Art also still produces and sells their mainstay, an original Voice Art concept in the form of Soundwave Prints (starting at $49.99) and Soundwave Canvases (starting at $89.99). These solid color backgrounds come in various sizes and styles, and are printed with your recorded message for wall display.

Dude Giveaway Vendor Participation

Are you an online retailer with a Dudeworthy product you'd like to grace upon our readers? Consider a Dude Giveaway partnership! Click here for details on prerequisites, giveaway procedures, and our contact information.

wilwheaton:

thisisfusion:

We made a Chrome extension to add real, ridiculous Donald Trump quotes to every mention of his name.

Try it for yourself. It does not disappoint.

Hahahaha. Genius.

It looks like not all is lost for our precious little Griffith Park Teahouse up in the hills. [ more › ]

Incredible new mixed media sculpture by Ellen Jewett, ‘a feral antiquity II’

mira-mirabiliaimages:

“Sanctuary”

http://www.miranedyalkova.com/index.php/2015/sanctuary

While Sunday offered a break—albeit a hot and muggy one—from yesterday's thunderstorm, meteorologists say more are on their way. [ more › ]

A major freeway is closed after heavy flooding washed out a bridge near the state border. [ more › ]

 

Legendary Meltdown Comics to Host Signing with Original Creator

LOS ANGELES, CA July 19th, 2015 – Oni Press, Portland’s premier independent comic book publisher, announced today a signing for their Invader Zim comic series at Meltdown Comics with original show and comic series creator Jhonen Vasquez and original show and comic series artist Aaron Alexovich on July 22nd. With issue #1 released on July 8th to a massively positive reception, this will be the first time Jhonen Vasquez and Aaron  Alexovich sign the comic book adaptation of the hit Nickelodeon show outside of convention appearances. The signing will be hosted by Los Angeles’ mecca for all things comic book, comedy, podcasting and pop-culture related, Meltdown Comics.

In 2001 animation fans were introduced to Zim, the diminutive, naïve Irken soldier, assigned to invade Earth to keep him from disrupting his leaders’ plans to expand their empire. Arriving on the unsuspecting planet, he tries to blend in by disguising himself and his malfunctioning robot sidekick GIR as a human boy and his dog. Zim is constantly hounded by his nemesis Dib, who recognizes his alien nature, and Dib’syounger sister Gaz. The show and Vasquez’s iconic characters went on to become cult classics with a following to this day. Fans have been waiting for the return of Zim and GIR; now they have it in the first all-Zim comic book series, part of Nickelodeon’s commitment to bring its beloved classic characters to new audiences.

About Meltdown Comics

The mecca for all things comic book, comedy, podcasting and pop-culture related bits, Meltdown hosts a blockbuster line-up of events and programs that in the past have garnered such accolades as “Best of LA” LA Weekly, “Best of LA” LA Magazine, “Best Comedy” LA Weekly, “Top 50 things why LA kicks ass?” LA Weekly, “Best Store” Playboy Magazine, etc.

About Oni Press

Oni Press has been Portland’s premier indie comic book publisher since 1997. Home to a range of rad comics including Scott Pilgrim, The Sixth Gun, Invader Zim, Rickand Morty, Stumptown, Princess Ugg, Letter 44 and The Bunker, Oni Press strives to create comics for you.

About Nickelodeon

Nickelodeon, now in its 36th year, is the number-one entertainment brand for kids. It has built a diverse, global business by putting kids first in everything it does. The company includes television programming and production in the United States and around the world, plus consumer products, online, recreation, books and feature films. Nickelodeon’s U.S. television network is seen in more than 100 million households and has been the number-one-rated basic cable network for 20 consecutive years. For more information or artwork, visit http://www.nickpress.com. Nickelodeon and all related titles, characters and logos are trademarks of Viacom Inc. (NASDAQ: VIA, VIAB).

###

Contacts:

fred@onipress.com

So proud of Calvin who completed his first mammal #taxidermy here at Prey at only 8 years old! Great job, buddy.

This pet lizard lives in a real-life video game, and we are jealous as hell.      

Rack of Lamb. Whole Shank Osso Bucco. Crown Pork Roast with Pineapple Bread Stuffing. It's not just beef it's all kinds of MEAT that are what's for dinner in Pat LaFrieda's full-color book of buying, butchering, cooking, and indulging in what he considers the only reason to eat. LaFrieda's street cred for creating Meat: Everything You Need to Know includes his experience as a third generation butcher and ownership of a premiere American meatpacking business that supplies cuts to some of the country's finest restaurants. The 75 recipes for beef, pork, lamb, veal, and poultry appearing throughout MEAT have either been passed down the LaFrieda family line or are donations from regaled New York restauranteurs such as Lidia Bastianich, Josh Capon, Mike Toscano, and Jimmy Bradley.

Along with detailed instructions for dishes ranging from Frenched Chop with Red Onion Soubise to Chipotle-Braised Tomahawk Short Ribs MEAT provides step-by-step and photographic instructions for tricky prep techniques like butterflying a veal chop or tying a crown roast, plus advice on which cuts of meat and equipment to buy, and anecdotes of the decades that have gone into creating the LaFrieda legacy in the NYC meatpacking industry.

Although the 15 freeway has been reopened for weekend warriors on their way to Vegas, the fire that destroyed several cars rages on in its second day. [ more › ]

cuteanimalspics:

I think there’s something wrong with your duck (Source:…

did-you-kno:

did-you-kno:

Giant tarantulas keep tiny frogs as pets. Insects will eat the burrowing tarantulas’ eggs - so the spiders protect the frogs from predators, and in return the frogs eat the insects. Source

Plot twist: The tiny frogs are keeping giant tarantulas as pets.