If you’ve had sex with less than 12 people , people that have had sex with you belong to a more exclusive club than those who have walked on the moon.
also applicable if you haven’t had sex since 1972, or if the main reason people have sex with you is to spite the Russians, or if having sex with you takes 7.5 million pounds of thrust and ends with you splashing down in the Pacific Ocean.
The third in a series of Disney Princesses with Service Dogs! Here’s Sleeping Beauty with Narcolepsy and her service pup is supporting her head after a daytime sleepiness episode.
Narcolepsy itself is a neurological condition that affects sleep and awakeness, and is often characterized by episodes of sleep in a variety of daytime situations. Thought this would be suited for Sleeping Beauty!
P.S. Her service dog’s name is Spindle~
Feel free to share to raise awareness and acceptance for people with disabilities and service dogs!
~Also, I’d really appreciate if you could donate to my service dog fundraising campaign here. https://www.youcaring.com/ariensmith-759774 No donation is too small. It would mean a lot!~
The problem with LGBT is that even when you add As and Is and Ps and Ks and what not, you are defining who's in the group, and by extention, indicating that anyone else is outside the group. Not to mention the fact that a) half the time people literally just forget who's supposed to be in the list, and b) that a lot of people who identify with the more populous groups have been known to try to exclude members of the less populous ones, even when they are sitting there, in the name. So fuck the list. I'm queer, you're queer, we're all right to be here.
Honestly “queer” is so useful for people like me w/ a “complicated orientation” b/c instead of having to say I’m “asexual panromantic” and explain what that means, I can just say “I’m queer” and it tells you all you need to know (that I’m not straight).
yeah sure good for you but don’t ever ever use that word for someone who doesn’t identify as it themselves, it’s not an umbrella term for everyone. also “pan/ace” would definitely work, even if you don’t want to use it, other people could. i use ace lesbian and definitely not the q slur.
Wow its almost like they were just talking about using it on themselves for individual reasons and you butted in to be an ass and be condescending because you think you’re superior for not using queer, then you called their identity a slur right to them. But that can’t possibly be what you were trying to do, right?
Anyone is allowed to use it for themselves, I never said no one should do that if that’s what they want. Queer is a slur though. I just want people to be aware of that, I have no idea if OP is aware of that or not but some people using that word aren’t. I’m tired of people including me and other people who don’t want to be included in that word, and before anyone asks, I never meant that OP did that, because I literally have no idea if they do.
Queer is a slur as much as any other LGBT+ word, I just want you to be aware of that.
“Gay” is used as an insult. It is used to be demeaning. Its used to discriminate. And yet its used as the all mighty umbrella - gay rights, gay marriage, gay community - when discussing the entire community.
Gay gets used as a slur. Queer gets used as a slur. But I don’t walk up to gay people and say “your identity is a slur, you know that right” or get pissed when they say “the gay community” when they mean the whole community.
Personal identity and preference in terms, even harmful words that get used as slurs, are not questioned; except for the word Queer.
Queer gets shut down. Queer people get others in their faces saying “your identity is a slur!” Queer people don’t have the freedom to identify in a community, but are forced under other terms against their will due to hypocrisy and double standards.
So if you’re not going to come onto gay people’s posts for the same behavior, maybe critically analyze why exactly you feel the need to be so condescending to Queer people, specifically on posts that ONLY have to do with personal identity. Why you feel the need to insist to Queer people that their identities are slurs, to directly slap away the power of reclaiming a word from them by demanding it remain in the hands of the Straights as a perpetual slur.
I think an important difference between gay and queer is however, that queer started out as a slur used against members of the community and continues to be used as a slur in many places. Whereas gay began as a word the community chose itself to describe itself and was then later used by homophobes and heterosexuals in general in a negative way, meaning however, that gay doesn’t hold the same negative connotations as queer for many people simply because it was our word that they took, and not a word that they forced on us to make us “strange” or “other” like queer means.
That’s…. Not true. People think so because the history before gay was reclaimed is way older (older than any love community member’s lifetimes, probably,) but gay had the exact same origins.
It was meant to denote sexually perverse people, most frequently sex workers and those who hired them. Anyone who participated in anything but married, vanilla, straight sex might have been referred to as “gay,” including any suspected LGBT person.
The word (already being one frequently used on the community,) was reclaimed as a community identifier when the community wanted to disconnect from the clinical and diagnostic implications of “homosexual.”
There is record of queer being reclaimed and used as a personal identifier literally before the popularization of gay. Both words are reclaimed slurs with negative histories, and BOTH are used as slurs against the community still to this day.
The more recent history of the mid to late 20th century more prevalently favored queer as a slur, as is represented in our media. However its clearly undeniable that the switch back to gay as the popular community slur (along with the ever present f slur,) happened in the 2000s. Which is trying to be denied and rewritten by the anti queer crowd, who completely ignore the words popularity with community members who actually lived through when it was a popular slur.
Yes to all of this. When it comes to words for “not straight” there are hardly any choices that didn’t originate as ways to stigmatize or pathologize us. We are all using reclaimed slurs to describe ourselves.
Also, queer is reclaimed in a particularly empowering way. It doesn’t just mean “same-sex attraction” but encompasses a whole spectrum of attractions and gender orientations. It’s a word that says to asexuals, pansexuals, bisexuals, trans folks, genderfluid and genderqueer and genderless folks and people who are still figuring themselves out, “hey, you’ve got a home here. We don’t need to categorize you to love you.”
This is important because there are a lot of divisions within the LGBTQ+ world, and in particular cis gay men and cis lesbians often overlook or exclude trans, bi and asexual people. Queer is the only word that not only demands equal acceptance for everyone, but leaves the door open for words and descriptors that haven’t even been invented yet.
Somebody else pointed this out earlier to me, and of course I’ve lost the post, but it’s really suspicious that of all the reclaimed slurs, the one that gets the most pushback is the one that is most radically accepting of all identities
“hey, you’ve got a home here. We don’t need to categorize you to love you.”
Lmao yeah! the pushback against this idea is overt and disgusting and I don’t trust anybody who perpetuates it.
Queer is an ideology and an identity, historically and now. It is an umbrella for that ideology and an umbrella for those identities, historically and now. They can’t be conflated (with LGBT) and it’s super fucking disingenuous to pretend one is just the tarnished besmirched dirty slur version of the other. They’re different. In my particular work for example, Queer bioethics is different from LGBT bioethics and conflating the two will muddle any discussion you try to have about them because they lead to literally opposite conclusions in some cases.
Yeah I freaking love pancakes
Wait wrong post
By far the best addition to this post
This is one of those things where I feel like an old.
Like, *the* slogan I associate with pride is, “We’re here, we’re queer – get used to it!”
There was a TV show called “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy” that was total mainstream pap. (Not that the show wasn’t riddles problematic elements from the concept out, but ‘queer’ in the title was clearly meant as a positive.)
I just have a hard time processing queer as anything but reclaimed.
They actually shot “Queer As Folk” in my city!
TERFs and radical gender/sexuality bianarists are flooding social media and blogging sites with propaganda smearing the word queer in the hopes of silencing all of us who don’t identify with their hate politics. I fought hard to reclaim the word queer in the late 80s and early 90s, and it’s the one word that doesn’t worship exclusion. Which is why these people are trying to convince you not to use it. fuck that noise. there is literally no word i could use to identify my sexuality that hasn’t been thrown at me in hatred, fear, and violence. No way am I giving up the one of those that allows me to talk about all of my community without trying to put people in boxes they don’t fit in.
I will never not reblog this post. Queer, queer, queer here.
“Queer” has been claimed by queer people as a self-descriptor since at least 1910. It’s an insult to those historical people (and all the generations of queer historical people who have identified as queer since then) to pretend that the people using it as a slur owned it more than the queer people who used it as a self-descriptor.
Source: George Chauncey, “Gay New York,” page 101
They don’t want us to use queer because they don’t want to be lumped in with anyone who’s not cis gay or cis lesbian. So fine. You don’t like the word queer? You don’t want to be in the “queer” community? Get the fuck out, then. Y'all don’t welcome us in your community anyway, so we’ll just have our own.
And it’ll be queer as fuck.
I fucking love the word queer ❤
The pushback against queer is RECENT.
Look, kids. I’m officially Old. And when my little queer (bisexual, grey-asexual) arse was realising this, I was in HIGH SCHOOL. And you know when that was? This was before AZT use was widespread. HIV was a death sentence. You know who nursed those guys, ran their errands and sat with them as they were dying from AIDS? Well, me, for one (mostly I was just doing grocery shopping but I sat my fair share of deathbed vigils as a young teen) but it was the queer community. That was how we identified. And lesbian women and trans folk and people from ALL KINDS of orientations got together and cared for these people (mostly gay men and trans women, and a lot of sex workers in there).
We were queer. And we were, and still are, fucking angry. Betrayed by our governments, in lots of cases disowned by our families, all we had was each other. And we were queer.
And then later, we had queer studies and queer theory at uni. This is over 20-30 years ago. They do not name university courses after slurs. They named it after OUR IDENTITY.
So you children, who never nursed your dying friends want to come along and declare MY IDENTITY A SLUR?
FUCK YOU. FUCK YOU, FUCK YOU, FUCK YOU.
YOU ARE WRONG. YOU ARE AHISTORICAL AND YOU. ARE. WRONG.
Fuck you. Fuck your exclusionary politics. Gay has been used as a slur far more recently than queer. As has lesbian.
You want to police the queer community. You want to gate-keep. You want to exclude people like me, you want to define what a woman is, what genders people can be.
WE’RE HERE, WE’RE QUEER. Get used to it.
Honestly, the way some people act it’s like. . You can’t reclaim slurs, but you can’t create new words without being branded the butt of a joke, so people who don’t feel like outlet labels fit them are supposed to just sit and suffer in silence.
If you don’t want to be called queer then fine, but don’t erase the history of those who used it, who fought for it TO be used as an umbrella term. If you don’t want it applied to you then fine, but don’t say what it should and shouldn’t be used for. I know that many people hear it as a slur and don’t want it applied, but to say it can’t be an umbrella term based on that doesn’t make sense. “Gay” is one of the absolutely most common slurs I have ever heard used in my life and it still gets used and applied to umbrella situations. If we went off of if things have been used against us as slurs then we wouldn’t have anything to call ourselves.
I’m here, I’m queer, and it took me a damn long time to get used to it and I’m not going back now.
This post has helped me. I am asexual, autistic, i have issues due to sexual trauma, i am agender… I thought i couldnt use the word queer. Thanks to you guys i feel welcome.
I am queer, thanks.
if you get no thing else out of this post (because i know its long) i suggest you at least try to get this:
It’s a word that says to asexuals, pansexuals, bisexuals, trans folks, genderfluid and genderqueer and genderless folks and people who are still figuring themselves out, “hey, you’ve got a home here. We don’t need to categorize you to love you.”
because it is fantastic
you can get a phd in Queer Literature.
enough of this terf shit. learn your history and stop being the private army of anyone who sounds offended.
So there has been a bit of “what if humans were the weird ones?” going around tumblr at the moment and Earth Day got me thinking. Earth is a wonky place, the axis tilts, the orbit wobbles, and the ground spews molten rock for goodness sakes. What if what makes humans weird is just our capacity to survive? What if all the other life bearing planets are these mild, Mediterranean climates with no seasons, no tectonic plates, and no intense weather?
What if several species (including humans) land on a world and the humans are all “SCORE! Earth like world! Let’s get exploring before we get out competed!” And the planet starts offing the other aliens right and left, electric storms, hypothermia, tornadoes and the humans are just … there… counting seconds between flashes, having snowball fights, and just surviving.
To paraphrase one of my favorite bits of a ‘humans are awesome’ fiction megapost: “you don’t know you’re from a Death World until you leave it.” For a ton of reasons, I really like the idea of Earth being Space Australia.
Earth being Space Australia
Words cannot express how much I love these posts
Alien: “I’m sorry, what did you just say your comfortable temperature range is?”
Human: “Honestly we can tolerate anywhere from -40 to 50 Celcius, but we prefer the 0 to 30 range.”
Alien: “……. I’m sorry, did you just list temperatures below freezing?”
Human: “Yeah, but most of us prefer to throw on scarves or jackets at those temperatures it can be a bit nippy.”
Other human: “Nah mate, I knew this guy in college who refused to wear anything past his knees and elbows until it was -20 at least.”
Human: “Heh. Yeah everybody knows someone like that.”
Alien: “……. And did you also say 50 Celcius? As in, half way to boiling?”
Human: “Eugh. Yes. It sucks, we sweat everywhere, and god help you if you touch a seatbelt buckle, but yes.”
Alien: “……. We’ve got like 50 uninhabitable planets we think you might enjoy.”
“You’re telling me that you have… settlements. On islands with active volcanism?”
“Well, yeah. I’m not about to tell Iceland and Hawaii how to live their lives. Actually, it’s kind of a tourist attraction.”
“What, the molten rock?”
“Well, yeah! It’s not every day you see a mountain spew out liquid rocks! The best one is Yellowstone, though. All these hot springs and geysers from the supervolcano–”
“You ACTIVELY SEEK OUT ACTIVE SUPERVOLCANOES?”
“Shit, man, we swim in the groundwater near them.”
Sounds like the “Damned” trilogy by Alan Dean Foster.
“And you say the poles of your world would get as low as negative one hundred with wind chill?”
“Yup, with blizzards you cant see through every other day just about.”
“Amazing! when did you manage to send drones that could survive such temperatures?”
“… well, actually…”
“… what?”
“…we kinda……. sent……….. people…..”
“…”
“…”
“…what?”
“we sent-”
“no yeah I heard you I just- what? You sent… HUMANS… to a place one hundred degrees below freezing?”
“y-yeah”
“and they didn’t… die?”
“Well the first few did”
“PEOPLE DIED OF THE COLD AND YOUR SOLUTION WAS TO SEND MORE PEOPLE???!?!?!?”
My new favorite Humans are Weird quote
“PEOPLE DIED OF THE COLD AND YOUR SOLUTION WAS TO SEND MORE PEOPLE?”
aka The History of Russia
aka Arctic Exploration
aka The History of Alaska
Being from Alaska, this was sort of how I felt going to college in the lower 48′s and learned that no one else had been put through a literal survival camp as a regular part of their school curriculum, including but not limited to:
1. Learning to recognize all forms of animal tracks in the wild so you can avoid bears and moose and search out rabbits and other small animals to eat.
2. Extensive swimming and climbing on glacial pieces with competitions to see who could last the longest, followed by a group sit in the sauna so we wouldn’t get hypothermia (no, not kidding, I really did this many times as a kid!)
3. How to navigate using the stars to get back to civilization.
4. How to select the right type of moss from the trees to start a fire with damp wood (because, y’know, you’re in a field of snow. Nothing is dry.)
5. How to carve out a small igloo-like space to sleep in the snow to preserve body heat and reduce the windchill so you won’t freeze to death in the arctic.
“I’m telling you, I don’t think we need to worry about territory conflicts with the humans. You know all those deathtrap hell-worlds in the Argoth Cluster?” “Those worthless rocks? Yeah.” “80% of them are considered ‘resort destinations’ by those freaky little primates.”
This would be an interesting read if this was a book.
Like, an alien invasion is about to start and the book is a chronicle of how the aliens couldn’t handle both humans in general and the range of environments and ended up being destroyed through the eyes of one of the aliens.
Like a caption from the book would be something like
“So we sent a recon team to this place called Russia, but all we’ve heard back thus far is about the temperatures, giant monsters with fur the humans call “Bears”, and that once again, we have been reminded of how heavily well armed almost ever human settlement is.
Thus far we have lost more than a good chunk of our forces through experiments gone wrong, unsuccessful fire fights, and above all else, the humans seem to be more worried about these strange variation of their species calling themselves “Clowns”.
I don’t know what a Clown is, but sounds as if it is the dominant faction of this planet, and considering we only just found out humans practically poison themselves with this thing called beer and only get stronger and more violent, I don’t ever want to encounter such a being.
I believe this invasion was a mistake.“
I’ve been reading a bunch of these and all I can think about now is aliens finding out about our insane ability to walk away from accidents.
“Human Colony SDO435**, this is Gxanimi survey vessel 3489. We regret that we must inform you that the wreckage of your ship ‘Gecko Flyer’ has just been detected on planet F56=K=. We offer expressions of sympathy for this catastrophe.”
“Shit, thanks for telling us, we’ll be right there.”
“Why?”
“To find our people, of course.”
“… you wish to retrieve the corpses for your traditional death rituals, of course, we understand. We have sent the coordinates.”
“What do you mean, bodies? No survivors at all? There must be some.”
“Official mouthpiece of Human Colony SDO435**, the ship has crashed. It has impacted the planet’s surface at speed. Moreover, this might have happened as much as five vek ago. We do not understand why you speak of ‘survivors’.”
“Oh, there’ll be survivors. There always are.”
“(closes hyperspace voicelink) How sad that they are unable to accept the reality of their loss.”
*
“Hey, Gxanimi survey vessel 3489, thanks for letting us know about the Gecko Flyer. More than half the crew made it!”
“Made what?”
“They survived! A couple of lost limbs and so on, but they’ll be fine.”
“… but that vessel was destroyed! Images have been examined!”
“Oh, well, everyone in the fore-below compartment was crushed, obviously, but the others made it out.”
“… but the crash was vek ago! Excuse we… at least eighty of your ‘days’! How could they survive without a ship? Without shelter and supplies?”
“Well, the wreckage gave them some shelter, and of course the emergency supplies kept them going until they could start growing stuff. It’s actually a nice little planet, they said. Quite a lot of edible flora and fauna. T-shirt weather, in summer, too.”
“What is… t-shirt weather?”
“Oh, you know, when it’s comfortable to go around with only modesty covering over the epidermis. Exposed limbs.”
“That planet is so cold that even water solidifies in its atmosphere!”
“Well, in winter, obviously. But we like that. Listen, our people have been raising crops down there, and that’s usually how we rule a planet as ‘colonized’…. is anyone else using it, or can we call it?”
“Er… we have claimed the warmer planets in the system, but we believe we could come to some arrangement.”
*
It was really nice, the humans thought, how carefully most of the aliens kept an eye out for downed ships after that, once they found out that humans tended to survive anything less than explosive decompression or… well, explosions generally. They’d immediately inform the nearest outpost of a wreck’s location, or even ship survivors back themselves. It was very thoughtful.
They didn’t find out until a long time later that the Gxanimi had put out the word to every species they were in contact with. It was vital that everyone knew the things they had learned about humans after that first encounter.
1. Humans can literally walk away from an impact that renders a space-worthy hull so much scrap and would have actually liquefied a Gxanimi.
2. Humans will eat just about anything not immediately fatal to them - including, in extremis, the corpses of their dead crewmates. In fact, most human vessels keep a list of those willing to be eaten and those whose socio-religious scruples forbid it. They have a ridiculously high tolerance for dangerous substances, and if they can breathe on a planet they can probably eat something on it too. They also have something they call the ‘Watney Protocol’, which requires them to carry live soil samples, seeds, and simple tools that will allow them to start farming their own native foodstuffs on any remotely habitable planet immediately in the event of an accident.
3. Once they’ve farmed a planet, they bond with it. They’ll be polite, but it’ll take significant effort to get rid of them even so.
Conclusion: If a human ship crashes on a planet you like and want to keep, get other humans to come and get them immediately. Remove them yourself if you have to. Even the worst crash can result in a thriving colony in a few vek.
And don’t, for the love of gravitational regularity, try to solve that problem by killing off the survivors. Just don’t. It won’t work and it just makes all the rest of them mad.
there was this news article going around a while ago that claimed that flint had clean water again, and as a resident of flint, i can tell you thats bullshit. that article, though, made a lot of people go “oh! problem solved!! i dont have to worry about flint anymore!” wrong. we’re still suffering here.
See I’ve seen like 600 variations of this meme and I gotta tell you a Story.
The year is 2012. It’s Christmas. It’s the first year my sister and I are both home from college, and we’re feeling kind of nostalgic, so we take out the old family photo albums to remember everyone from times past. We’re all on the couch or the floor with hot chocolate and the Dog is curled up under the tree. It’s all very Norman Rockwell.
We’re going through my Mom’s side of the family, laughing at the pictures of Grandma putting wrapping paper on the dog, and grandpa pulling faces at the camera, when we find an old brown envelope.
“The fuck? says my sister, because she’s been in to Great-Aunt Liz’s Rumballs, and I open the envelope. Inside are four tickets to the titanic, unused, and Mom tells us the story of how her ancestors ALMOST came over on the Titanic, but Great-Aunt Liz got the measles and forced everyone into quarantine, thus saving their lives.
The OTHER thing in the envelope are seven Photographs, dated 1890. They are of my Great-Great Grandmother.
They are nudes.
They are NOT tasteful nudes.
Like, these are Violating-Terms-Of-Service-On-Most-Platforms- OBSCENE.
GGG had these taken waaaaay back in ye olden days, in order to convince her wayward husband to move back to England after he ditched her to party it up in Chicago.
I CANNOT TELL YOU HOW FUCKING HARD WE LAUGHED. Like, I think I passed out I was laughing so hard.
So yes, people have ALWAYS been like this, and your nudes will make for a hilarious family Christmas someday.
anyways hermione is a cutthroat bitch and her demonizing divination is due to the fact that she literally #cannot with emotional forms of magic. quidditch? which requires an emotional partnership of trust with the broom? nope. divination? which requires an emotional openness and willingness to forego logical conclusion at the whims of fate? are u fuckin kidding me. patronuses? which require not just technical skill but also a deep connection with your own emotional core? uhhhhh we’ll just let harry handle that one.
movie!hermione, w/ her advanced emotional intelligence and absolute willingness to meet each and every emotional need the boys have, should have of course been good at emotional magics like divination. shes fucking superwoman. but book!hermione? who destroyed a girls face without mercy because she ratted out the DA? who erased her parents memories so she could fight in a war? who solved dumbledores’ mysteries using ancient runes, an art that is practically the math of magic? book!hermione will destroy you and she will do it armed with the cold hard facts and the cold hard facts alone. book!hermione doesn’t give a shit. instead of getting a regular pet, book!hermione was drawn to a magical cat who is self-serving and intellectual and helped her gather clues rather than serving as an emotional companion. i mean fck.
full offense but hermione is so hardcore and logic-driven and she literally could give a SHIT about ur feelings
I was gonna counter this with the fact she gave the boys emotional advice on their love lives, but even then she did it in a very cold, logical way. “Cho is feeling x because y therefore you should have done z.”
i hope none of that was intended to be a criticism of hermione bc honestly it all made me love her more.
I love when I get a facebook post reported for abuse, reported for spam, and an attempted hack of my account, all in the same night. Why? Because it lets me know that I need to put that sucker on blast ALL OVER THE PLACE.
Art Critic: the skull in the corner is artfully placed on the periphery of vision to symbolise the omnipresence of death, important thematically to the artist’s conception of life and mortality.
Actual Artist: aw shit, I got all this negative space, guess I’ll stick a skull there that looks pretty rad.
"You can see he's real shaky, that comes from lying curled in a ball for four months." RELATABLE.
This video, charmingly narrated by a man who wisely decided to mount a camera outside of a bear den near his house, shows us exactly what is on a bear’s to-do list in the days after hibernation ends.
no, but really: flytraps use up a LOT of energy closing their traps. You know a lot of other plants that move that much? Tricking them into closing when there isn’t food there is indeed mean.
B-but… they’re plants… they’re devoid of sentience, right? They don’t “feel,” they’re more like little wind-up machines. Right? They don’t act on instinct, they’re… well… traps. You can’t actually be mean to a plant. Right??
I’m of the opinion that meanness is about the nature of the action, not awareness on the part of the target of the action.
Tricking them into closing their traps is actually harmful to them, since the energy expended in closing and then re-opening the trap isn’t replenished by having a tasty insect to digest.
I’m of the opinion that meanness is about the nature of the action, not awareness on the part of the target of the action.
I'm sorry, is the Midwest claiming it knows what cheddar is? Because these folks don't recognize cheese if it isn't orange. Canada can't produce maple syrup, and Wisconsin can't make good cheese. It's that simple, folks. Man, I miss Vermont.
Guess where the top three cheeses at the 19th Biennial U.S. Championship Cheese Contest were from?
Steve Rogers did, in fact, realize that something was off when he saw the outline of the woman’s odd bra (a push-up bra, he would later learn), but being an officer and a gentleman, he said that it was the game that gave the future away.
No, see, this scene is just amazing. The costume department deserves so many kudos for this, it’s unreal, especially given the fact that they pulled off Peggy pretty much flawlessly.
1) Her hair is completely wrong for the 40’s. No professional/working woman would have her hair loose like that. Since they’re trying to pass this off as a military hospital, Steve would know that she would at least have her hair carefully pulled back, if maybe not in the elaborate coiffures that would have been popular.
2) Her tie? Too wide, too long. That’s a man’s tie, not a woman’s. They did, however, get the knot correct as far as I can see - that looks like a Windsor.
3) That. Bra. There is so much clashing between that bra and what Steve would expect (remember, he worked with a bunch of women for a long time) that it has to be intentional. She’s wearing a foam cup, which would have been unheard of back then. It’s also an exceptionally old or ill-fitting bra - why else can you see the tops of the cups? No woman would have been caught dead with misbehaving lingerie like that back then, and the soft satin cups of 40’s lingerie made it nearly impossible anyway. Her breasts are also sitting at a much lower angle than would be acceptable in the 40’s.
Look at his eyes. He knows by the time he gets to her hair that something is very, very wrong.
so what you are saying is S.H.E.I.L.D. has a super shitty costume division….
Nope, Nick Fury totally did this on purpose.
There’s no knowing what kind of condition Steve’s in, or what kind of person he really is, after decades of nostalgia blur the reality and the long years in the ice (after a plane crash and a shitload of radiation) do their work. (Pre-crash Steve is in lots of files, I’m sure. Nick Fury does not trust files.) So Fury instructs his people to build a stage, and makes sure that the right people put up some of the wrong cues.
Maybe the real Steve’s a dick, or just an above-average jock; maybe he had a knack for hanging out with real talent. Maybe he hit his head too hard on the landing and he’s not gonna be Captain anymore. On the flipside, if he really is smart, then putting him in a standard, modern hospital room and telling him the truth is going to have him clamming up and refusing to believe a goddamn thing he hears for a really long time.
The real question here is, how long it does it take for the man, the myth, the legend to notice? What does he do about it? How long does he wait to get his bearings, confirm his suspicions, and gather information before attempting busting out?
Turns out the answer’s about forty-five seconds.
Sometimes clever posts die a quiet death in the abyss of the unreblogged. Some clever posts get attention, get comments, get better. Then there’s this one which I’ve watched evolve into a thing of brilliance.
Armadillos are real because, in spite of the fact that humans live here, the world is truly kind of awesome.
According to zoologists, armadillos are mammals with tough leather hides classified in the Exafroplacentalia clade and Xenarthra superorder, two categories that also include sloths and anteaters. According to me, however, armadillos are pokéballs with freakin’ muskrats living inside them.
we need more communist mysticism, more revolutionary romanticism, and basically what im saying is who wants to steal thomas muntzers scythe sword with me and use its magic to destroy capitalism
“Penguin’s Clean Sweep” Written by Stanford Sherman
Directed by Oscar Rudolph Season 3, Episode 20 Production code 1721
Original air date: January 25, 1968
The Bat-signal: At the Gotham City branch of the U.S. Mint, the Penguin breaks into steal a gift for his moll. O’Hara calls Gordon to let him know, as he’s at Wayne Manor, escorting Barbara to a meeting with Bruce to discuss her new position as the chair of the anti-littering committee. Gordon has O’Hara call Batman, so Alfred tells Bruce that a water pipe burst, and he needs a hand with the shut-off valve by way of covering to let him go into the study to answer the red phone.
Batman and Robin head to GCPD HQ, somehow arriving after Gordon has returned, even though Gordon has to travel the same distance and doesn’t have the benefit of a jet-powered vehicle. When they arrive, they bump into Penguin, his moll, and his two henchmen in the elevator. The Dynamic Duo escort the foursome to Gordon’s office, but it turns out that Penguin didn’t steal anything from the mint. Penguin threatens to sue the GCPD for false arrest but Batman points out that he still broke into the mint. Batman offers to drop the criminal charges if he drops the suit.
Gordon wonders why Batman gave him the offer, but Batman thinks they wouldn’t be able to hold him long on such minor charges. Batgirl shows up, claiming to have driven by the mint and found out what happened, and since Penguin didn’t take anything—even though he gassed the mint staff—they decide to head over to the mint and see what he might have left there. (Why they didn’t also arrest Penguin on assault charges in addition to the B&E is left as an exercise for the viewer.)
Using the portable bat-lab (kept in a blue case handily labelled, “PORTABLE BAT-LAB”), Batman discovers that the latest batch of moolah has the bacterium for Lygerian sleeping sickness mixed into the ink. According to the guard, a shipment of money was sent to the Gotham National Bank after Penguin’s break-in. Batgirl heads to the bank while Batman and Robin go to the hospital to obtain the vaccine for Lygerian sleeping sickness. (How a batch of money managed to actually be printed and put into circulation when the entire staff has been unconscious since Penguin broke in is also left as an exercise for the viewer.)
Unfortunately, Penguin is way ahead of them. He’s already at the hospital and has himself and his people inoculated against the sleeping sickness, then dumps the rest of the vaccine in the storm sink. When Batman and Robin arrive, he keeps them at bay with his deadly Lygerian fruit flies (kept in a small box labelled, “LYGERIAN FRUIT FLIES”). Batman and Robin manage to kill two of the flies, and they keep a third in a bottle for safe keeping.
Before Batgirl arrives at the bank, $13,000 of it has been circulated (how this happened in less than two hours is also left as an exercise for the viewer). Batman calls Gordon and urges him to tell everyone to not touch their money. The citizenry of Gotham immediately throw their money away, which leaves Penguin to vacuum it all up, since he’s immune to the sleeping sickness. Batgirl tries to stop him, but is gassed for her trouble.
Bruce calls several of his financier buddies and warns them not to take any cash from Gotham City. Meanwhile, Penguin and his gang are rolling in dough, but they can’t spend it thanks to Bruce calling all his fellow one-percenters. Furious, Penguin calls Bruce and threatens him with releasing five hundred Lygerian fruit flies on Gotham if he doesn’t reverse those calls. Bruce refuses, so Penguin unleashes the fruit flies and heads to the Gotham National Bank, where Batman, Robin, Batgirl, Gordon, and O’Hara are all waiting and pretending to be struck with sleeping sickness. But it turns out that it’s cold enough in Gotham today for the flies to go into hibernation. Sure.
Fisticuffs ensue, and Penguin is stopped. It also turns out that he asked the doctor for a double dose of the vaccine, which doesn’t actually make inoculations work better—it just makes you more likely to contract the sickness, as Penguin discovers when he starts to nod off.
Later, Gordon and Bruce both visit Barbara, but their pleasant coffee is interrupted by a call to Gordon from Bonnie, who transfers a call from Warden Crichton, warning him that Shame is being visited by two women: Calamity Jan and Frontier Fanny.
Fetch the Bat-shark-repellant! Batman keeps an all-purpose bat-swatter in his utility belt, but when a fruit fly lands on Robin’s nose, Batman doesn’t fulfill the dreams of the entire viewership by biffing the boy wonder with the bat-swatter, but instead whips out the bat-tweezers. The Batcave has a Bat-Weather Instrument that can predict the weather—to a degree, anyhow, as it misses the fact that it’s about to rain. We also get to see the Portable Bat-Lab, which apparently consists of a microscope…
Holy #@!%$, Batman! “Holy hypodermics!” is what Robin exclaims when he and Batman head to the hospital. “Holy Rip Van Winkle,” is what Robin literary-references when Batman saves him from the Lygerian fruit fly.
Gotham City’s finest. It never occurs to trained law-enforcement personnel Gordon and O’Hara that they can still arrest Penguin for breaking and entering the mint, even if they can’t get him on robbery. Batman does remind them that B&E is on the table, but it doesn’t occur to any of the dunderheads that there’s also an assault charge to be made.
Special Guest Villain. It’s Burgess Meredith’s swan song as the Penguin (though he will make an uncredited cameo as Penguin two months hence on an episode of The Monkees).
Na-na na-na na-na na-na na.
“Hello, World League of Nations? I’d like to buy a country—what have you got? … No, I don’t want that one—I’m allergic to vodka.”
–Penguin trying to spend his ill-gotten gains.
Trivial matters: This episode was discussed on The Batcave Podcast episode 63 by host John S. Drew with special guest chum, Chris Gould, author of Batman at 45: The Ultimate Tribute to Pow, Bam, and Zap!
Penguin’s moll is played by Belgian actor Monique van Vooren, who was best known at this stage in her career for title role in Tarzan and the She-Devil (she played the she-devil, obviously), and who later would be known for her role in Andy Warhol’s 1973 cult classic Flesh for Frankenstein. She’s still alive, and her most recent credit is the found-footage film Greystone Park from Sean Stone.
John Beradino makes an uncredited cameo as a doctor, lampooning his then-current role as a doctor on the soap opera General Hospital.
Pow! Biff! Zowie! “Nobody catches the Penguin sleeping!” I spent a lot of time watching this episode staring at the screen, tilting my head, and saying, “Huh?” The script can’t seem to make up its mind as to whether or not Lygerian sleeping sickness is fatal, for one thing, which is just odd.
Even if it isn’t fatal, though, the response of the Gotham City citizenry to the knowledge that the sickness is in their cash makes absolutely no sense. If the money was dangerous, people might burn it, they might put it in a jar, they might take it to the bank to exchange it for non-contaminated currency. (Since all the bad currency came from one bank, they can just go to a different branch.)
The one thing I guarantee that no one would do is just dump their cash onto the street.
Which is kind of a problem, as the Penguin’s entire plot is predicated on that response. And it just doesn’t make any kind of sense. Neither does Bruce calling his rich buddies and telling them not to accept any cash from Gotham City—first off, international transactions on that level were made even then by wire transfer, not cash exchange, and secondly, I’m not sure that any millionaire, billionaire, or trillionaire would turn down a major financial transaction just because Bruce Wayne asked them not to…
On top of that, Batman just lets Penguin go after he committed a crime, because he wants to play out what the real big plan is. Well, why do that? Seriously, that’s some sociopathic shit there. It makes considerably more sense to just arrest the bastard…
Burgess Meredith does the best he can—his sardonic wordplay is as strong as ever here—and the opening finally shows that someone other than Bruce can be the chair of a committee or organization in Gotham. (Though really, Barbara? Anti-littering? That’s the best you can do?) But the plot is just dopey and cuts off the air supply to my disbelief, even more than most Batman 66 plots.
Bat-rating: 2
Keith R.A. DeCandido will be a guest at the first-ever HELIOsphere convention in Tarrytown, New York this weekend, alongside guests of honor David Gerrold, Jacqueline Carey, and Danielle Ackley-McPhail, among many others. Saturday will be the launch party for Baker Street Irregulars, the alternate Sherlock Holmes anthology that Keith has a story in; fellow contributors Gerrold, Austin Farmer, Hildy Silverman, and Ryk Spoor, and co-editor Michael A. Ventrella will also be there. Keith’s full schedule can be found here.
Like these guys need help undermining their own agenda.
Sure, the Obama family says they have a perfectly innocent reason for remaining in the Washington, D.C. area.
The Obamas have said they would remain in the nation's capital until their youngest daughter, Sasha, completes high school.
But Republican Rep. Mike Kelly has revealed the alt-truth!
A Pennsylvania congressman has accused former President Barack Obama of staying in Washington solely to run a "shadow government" to undermine the GOP agenda.
U.S. Rep. Mike Kelly made the claim to fellow Republicans at an event Saturday north of Pittsburgh.
Would this be in the same way that Melania Trump remains in New York City to run a “shadow Russian espionage HQ” while Donald is away?
A video clip posted to YouTube shows Kelly saying that Obama remained in Washington for "one purpose only ... to run the shadow government that is going to totally upset the new agenda."
Damn shadow governments. How will Obama ever return to his childhood home in Kenya Hawaii, of course, Hawaii, with that shadow government taking up his time with so many secret, cabalistic meetings? Can’t these plots just plot themselves?
This message brought to you by the Council for Obama Obsession. It never goes away. To wit:
