firehose

luciferstwin:

circlebutt:

helpihavedementia:

brogigayo:

ticktaec:

tyleroakley:

My body is ready.

I know it’s mashed potatoes and gravy but is it bad that I thought it was ice cream and caramel?

 …it is ice cream and caramel

why would anyone put mashed potatoes and gravy in an apple

fucking what

lulz-time:

thatfunnyblog:

thanks, mum

Love that the lede byline is Clark Kent.

Love it.

kristaferanka:

herochan:

Batkid Saves Gotham City!

here’s a live update on his adventures

I’m not sentimental I am not sentimental I am not sentimental no there’s something in my eye why do you ask leave me alone I’m going to hold my children now…

Yesterday Harlem Globetrotters player Corey “Thunder” Law lobbed a basketball into a basket from a distance of 109 feet and 9 inches, a new world record. He bested the previous record, set nearly three years ago, by five feet.

via Digg

video via Harlem Globetrotters

doge.txt (by l2CRE4M)

Toronto-based photographer Brandon Allen has created “Deconstructed,” a two-part series of photos of video game controllers that have been taken apart. Each of the controllers was previously owned by a gamer who used it heavily, sometimes until the controller stopped working altogether. You can see more of the collection and purchase prints at Allen’s website.

Gaming has been around for as long as most of us can remember. Often the gamer is defined by the games they play and the tools they use. The controller is a pivotal tool used in gaming. Each console comes with its own controller, designed to maximize the experience of the system. As we game, these controllers become an extension of our own movements. They transform the way we game and our actions and conduct. They are extensions of ourselves, and as we use them, we grow attached to their touch. They are used to break language barriers and travel across continents. As we use them, they take on our characteristics, as much as we take on theirs.

Deconstructed is a series of dissected controllers collected from the gamers who owned them. Each controller was used and often played until it was no longer operable. Some have been physically altered, and others were damaged in attempts to fix them. This is their autopsy, a chance to compare our growth and commitment to the tools we use to game.

via Gizmodo

photo by Jeff Chiu for Associated Press

The Make-A-Wish Foundation has turned San Francisco into Gotham City today to fulfill the Batman-themed dream of five-year-old Miles Scott (aka BatKid), who has been battling leukemia for three years. Miles will be known as BatKid throughout the day as he travels around fighting well-known villains and rescuing damsels in distress. Make-A-Wish Bay Area on Twitter and the San Francisco Chronicle are posting live updates of BatKid’s heroic deeds around town. A livestream of the San Francisco Mayor awarding BatKid the Key to the City will start at 5:30 PM ET on ABC News.

San Francisco Chronicle photojournalists Mike Kepka and Luanne Dietz created a beautiful video that shares BatKid’s tough journey and his epic Make-A-Wish dream:

Here is video footage from KRON 4 News of BatKid saving the day:

photo by Jeff Chiu for Associated Press

photo by Mike Pelton of KRON4

photo by Amy Hollyfield for ABC News

The Batmobile has arrived for #SFBatkid! pic.twitter.com/JpJefkAesd

— Make-A-Wish Bay Area (@SFWish) November 15, 2013

Here he comes!!!! #SFBatkid pic.twitter.com/PhF85F4Mw3

— Make-A-Wish Bay Area (@SFWish) November 15, 2013

You've saved her, #SFBatkid! The citizens of Gotham thank you!!!! pic.twitter.com/Y5HBhVO7u0

— Make-A-Wish Bay Area (@SFWish) November 15, 2013

BREAKING: @PenguinSF has kidnapped @SFGiants mascot Lou Seal! Save him, #SFBatkid!!!! They're headed to AT&T Park! pic.twitter.com/s7UOYMYucC

— Make-A-Wish Bay Area (@SFWish) November 15, 2013

Presenting the Key to Gotham City (thx, @autodesk) to our little hero #SFBatKid for saving the day! #BatKidDay pic.twitter.com/1pjYAyebFs

— Edwin Lee (@mayoredlee) November 15, 2013

videos via ABC News and KRON 4 News

via SFGate Blog

Here’s a Friday night quickie (no, we’re not nipping off to the pub unfortunately—we’re getting ready for tomorrow’s Manchester Raspberry Jam).

Ordering pizza can be such a chore. At the very least you have to pick up the phone and shout, “Bring! Pizza! Here!” At worst it can actually involve going outside and all that that entails. The fine folks at iStrategyLabs have put paid to this nonsense with PiePal, a one button pizza ordering system.

PiePal was designed in SketchUp and printed on a MakerBot Replicator 2. Inside, the Raspberry Pi hooks into the API of Domino’s online ordering system to automatically order your favourite pie when you press the button.

If this has tickled your taste buds–or, indeed, your fancy–you can sign up as a beta tester.

Now: how to stop people—who have gone to sleep on your floor a bit worse for wear—waking up at 3am with the munchies and mashing the PiePal like a crazed lab rat while repeatedly grunting, “Peeeeee-ZAAAAHH! Peeeeee-ZAAAAHH!”

Mexicans aren’t feeling the love from their friends and family living abroad.

Remittances to Mexico have fallen by 29% since 2006, according to a report released by Pew Research and based on World Bank data. This bucks the trend for the rest of Latin America, where remittances have recovered after dropping during the recession.

The dwindling cash flow is heavily tied to the US economic slump. US residents are responsible for 98% of remittances to Mexico, according to the report. When the financial crisis hit, a handful of affected industries like construction that lean on Mexican immigrant labor dragged on the cash flowing back to Mexico. Have a look at what has happened to remittances since 2008:

Lately the tie between housing starts and remittances has eased, but it’s still substantial. That could be because former construction workers are moving to other industries (unemployment among Mexican migrants has been falling).

The flow of money to Mexico is also affected by a longer-term migratory shift. The number of Mexicans moving to the US has dropped sharply since the early 2000s. In fact, more people may be headed in the opposite direction, from the US to Mexico.

Remittances to Mexico, which will total an estimated $22 billion in 2013, have traditionally helped fund a number of industries at home. In 2003, they contributed more to Mexico’s economy than tourism or foreign direct investment. And they are key drivers of consumption in the country. But that doesn’t mean the trend is necessarily bad; Mexican GDP has nevertheless grown considerably since 2006. More Mexicans staying home could mean that they see more potential in the opportunities offered by their own economy.

Writer Brian Wood has responded to artist Tess Fowler's allegations of misconduct at Comic-Con International in San Diego several years ago. UPDATED with new comments from Fowler.

The Onion explains the difference between Sony’s PlayStation 4 and Microsoft’s Xbox One video game consoles with a funny comparison chart.

image via The Onion

by token

New York Yankees shortstop and team captain Derek Jeter has announced a co-publishing partnership with Simon & Schuster, one of the largest publishing houses in the country, that will create a new imprint called Jeter Publishing. The imprint is expected to release picture books, middle-grade fiction, as well as adult nonfiction. 

While the cynics among us may explain this new partnership as a savvy strategy—beleaguered-industry titan attaches itself to one of the most popular athletes (and therefore largest media forums) in the nation—Jeter explains that this development “sets the blueprint for [his] postcareer,” and gives him the opportunity to “discover new books,” “share insights,” and “instruct the kids on the best way to cover third during a rotation play.” Okay, so we made that last one up. 

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Says the IPRC:

We kind of can’t believe it but the one and only Amanda Palmer will play an intimate solo show at the IPRC, with ALL proceeds benefiting the Center’s mission to promote creative expression, identity and community.

Part performer, part poet, part political raconteur, Amanda Palmer rocks a live show like no other. General Admission gets you a hand pulled letterpress poster commemorating the event and our “Patron Package” includes an informal catered reception with Ms. Palmer and a 3-month membership to the IPRC.

I refuse to budge from my position of profound indifference re: Amanda Palmer. (Plenty of other people have strong feelings about the former Dresden Dolls frontwoman.) I hope the IPRC makes lots of money off of this, the IPRC is great. Tickets are $50; there's a very limited number and they're available here, or you can donate to the IPRC via the Willamette Week's give guide to be entered in a drawing to win tickets.

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WASHINGTON—Hoping to alleviate the controversy surrounding their allegedly racist name, representatives for the Washington Redskins announced Thursday that they will attempt to ease tensions with the nation’s outraged Native Americans by addin...

Speaking of working a lot, I launched the one and only "Fuck This." ice scraper today. What have I WROUGHT?

philnoto:

X-FORCE new number 1 variant cover

Tremendous.

As the Braves undertake plans to relocate to Cobb County, Georgia, it's once again time to hear how ballparks spark all kinds of positives that have yet to be borne out in actual practice.

Anyone who has visited the Willets Point in the borough of Queens to see the great Polish pianist Ignaz Paderewski play Schubert's polonaise from the good seats at Ralph's Auto Body and Used Tires knows what a boon Citi Field has been to the district. Around the soft, rolling parking lots that hold the ballpark in a welcoming embrace has sprung up an arts district that has been favorably compared to that of Venice during the Renaissance.

Not to be outdone, the Yankees proudly point to the numerous marble fountains that now dot the sidewalks around their ballpark, and the lovely way their plumes tickle the underside of the elevated subway tracks before dripping down to form rainbow-streaked pools on the shimmering streets. Since the opening of the new Yankee Stadium in 2009, the Bronx has become known as "the American Riviera," and on a spring afternoon it is not unusual to see Parisian tourists antiquing in the boutiques along Jerome Avenue, and expatriate Czech poets composing bitter sestinas over shots of espresso and absinthe at the sidewalk tables of the many romantic check-cashing establishments.

I had planned to discuss the many benefits that U.S. Cellular Field has brought to Chicago's South Side (the entire Museum Campus district has been relocated there, the Dalai Lama has been spotted checking out apartments, and every evening at dusk the sidewalks flood with debutantes) but I'm sure a little of this goes a long way. The point of all this exaggerated silliness is that whenever teams and politicians talk about the benefits of building a ballpark in a given community as a reason to invest millions in public funding, we need not make recourse to any of the countless studies that strongly suggest that the benefits of taxpayer subsidies to ballparks are either vanishingly small or nonexistent. Instead, we have merely to look at the buildings already in existence to see the lie in action.

Willets Point as viewed from Citi Field (Wikimeida Commons)

The reason why is as obvious as the calendar: There are 365 days in a year but 81 days in a home baseball season. There are 24 hours in a day, but perhaps six or eight hours in a day that a stadium is in use. It has long been axiomatic in city planning that the secret to successful neighborhoods is to have a variety of activities concentrated in a small areas -- businesses and residences, daytime uses and nighttime uses. In this way, the blocks in question are vibrant and alive as close to 24-7 as is possible.

That's a goal that stadia cannot possibly meet for the reasons suggested above, and that goes double for those that are not well-integrated into their neighborhoods but instead float like an island in a sea of parking lots. However much economic activity those buildings generate at the moment of use, the rest of the time, which is the vast majority, they basically turn into a blight in that the parcel is basically abandoned  during the time the park is idle. Add in that the benefits of said economic activity accrue mainly to the team and you have a really good reason for taxpayers to steer clear.

That never stops these things from happening, of course, even when the public is clearly set against it. One of the great hypocrisies of American culture is the opposition to government investment in people, but welfare for millionaires and billionaires and their companies is another thing altogether. That is perhaps not a meet topic for a sports site, but part of the story of any ballpark built over the last few decades is our willingness (or our representatives' willingness) to raid public funds for private enterprises. Yes, public dollars are often spent to fund private development, but the path to a return on the investment is often clearer than it is with these huge concrete donuts. Further, even when politicians promise that these developments will be neutral from a local taxpayer standpoint, that all of the hit will be taken by tourists, there is an opportunity cost -- those are revenues that could be going to schools or roads or parks that everyone can use, not just those that can afford the price of a ticket.

Miller Park in Milwaukee (Getty Images)

Cobb Country in Georgia is about to put up $300 million towards the construction of the Braves' new ballpark. As ballpark expert Neil deMause points out, the math being used to justify that expenditure is on the sketchy side. So it ever was. As the merits of the plan are being argued in the press and on the interwebs, just think back to all the times you went for a picnic at the cyclone fence that surrounds the Miller Park grounds or stopped off at an art exhibition at Dodger Stadium. New ballparks are great for baseball teams and fans, but they don't do much for cities. This is self-evident. So when someone says, "The economic impact which obviously will be very substantial," or, "the benefits will outweigh the costs," stick a finger in their eye... or better yet, just invite them out for a Yankee Stadium absinthe.

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