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In a story that will haunt my dreams, entomologist Piotr Naskrecki was walking through the rainforest of Guyana at night in search of katydids, as that is what he was studying. He says that typically in his field research, he walks slowly and quietly, so as not to disturb anything. He wears a headlamp, but turns it off on occasion, which he says helps him zone in on the sounds around him. Naskrecki was listening for the distinctive sounds of katydid wings when instead he heard something moving, crushing dry leaves under its feet. In his peripheral vision, he saw what he thought was a large, hairy rodent. 

It wasn't a large, hairy rodent, however. Instead, it was my very worst nightmare: the largest spider in the world. A South American goliath birdeater (Theraphosa blondi), to be exact. This big, hairy bowl of wrong has legs up to a foot in length, with feet that have hard tips and make clicking sounds as they move along. Its huge fangs are capable of puncturing the skull of a rodent with one clutch. Its size was compared to that of a newborn pup. 

Naskrecki said that not only did the spider make a hissing sound, rear its front legs and flex its monstrous fangs, but it rubbed its legs against its abdomen, producing a hairy cloud that made Piotr's eyes tear up and burn for several days afterward. (As I've written this and uploaded the images, I've stopped to take deep breaths several times and once glanced at a world map to remind myself how far that species is from me.)

Read more about Naskrecki's close encounter with Satan's housepet here. 
 
Images: Piotr Naskrecki 

 
 

(YouTube link)

The U.S. III Marine Expeditionary Force faces off with the Republic of Korea Army Band in a drum battle. Korea wins the coin toss, but the U.S. returns the fire with a ferocious display of intimidation tactics. A good time was had by all. If only all global conflicts could be resolved in this manner. Dancing sure beats becoming collateral damage for civilians! -via Digg

Would you light a scented candle that boasts of car exhaust smell? How about gasoline, chlorine, body odor, or fish? There’s even one called “Rest Stop” that smells of urine! They’re all products of the Stinky Candle Company. They’ve got more conventional candle scents like leather, coconut, and bacon, as well as some that are hard to classify, like toothpaste and wet grass. Those may be pleasant to some, unpleasant to others. And then there’s a scent called Spawn of the Devil that we don’t even want to know what it smells like! See the selection at their website.

Princess Peach in the pole position! Redditor ZDEdwards and friends played Mario Kart in real life, by taking the characters down to the go-cart facility. They were the most popular people at the park that day. No banana peels were thrown, and a good time was had by all.  

Image: Andres Martinez/Studio Rigby

Here's looking at you(r) wedding invite and posters, kids!

A couple's wedding is the time of their life when they get to feel like movie stars, so why not commemorate it Hollywood-style? David DiCicco and Rachael Batts were discussing ideas for their wedding invites when they came up with thought of creating one based on a Casablanca poster. They talked to their friend, a photographer and graphic designer named Andres Martinez of Studio Rigby - who not only agreed to make their wedding invites, but also movie posters as his wedding gift to them.

The results? Epicness!

Here are the movie posters that Martinez created for the glamorous couple, as he told the world over at reddit and imgur:

(Image Via Instagram)

(Image Via Instagram)

Coulrophobes had better steer clear of Staten Island for a while, until the local authorities take care of a certain creepy clown they’ve got lurking around the city streets.

He has become a bit of a local legend in the few short weeks he’s been clowning around the streets of S.I., because people claim he’s an elusive clown, appearing with a wave then disappearing back into the city before most of them can snap a pic.

Is this the same clown faced freak that has been haunting Northampton, England, or is this one of the British clown’s disciples? Whatever IT is, if you see the Staten Island clown prepare to laugh your head off!

-Via BuzzFeed

Friday afternoon, Mercer beat Duke in the NCAA Tournament. More importantly, Bears guard Kevin Canevari was so excited about beating Duke that he started dancing, brilliantly. Some people asked what the fuck he was doing. Others in the know and/or on Black Twitter recognized it immediately: Canevari was dropping that Nae Nae.

Read more...

(Photo: Brian Kelly)

Courtney Allen Curtis (left), a member of the Missouri House of Representatives, has proposed a bill that will make the high five the official greeting of the State of Missouri. It’s a joke, but he’s also serious about the subject.

Curtis explains that he often gives high fives to other members while he walks around the floor of the House chamber. It’s a way of promoting collegiality. Fiercely debating serious issues can set members at odds with each other. But they’re opponents, not enemies. A high five is friendly and encourages people to work together. Surely that’s worth at least an air five.

-via Legal Juice | Photo: Curtis for Missouri

This is from Christmas, but it's the gift that keeps on giving. Kevin Garnett disagreed with a call from the referees (or maybe he was uncomfortable in those jersey tee-shirts) and voiced his displeasure. Little man in the Nets tee and Yankees hat got an assist from his older brother (?), who earmuffed the little tyke.

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36 Things I Want To Do Before I Die

Josh Sundquist (previously at Neatorama) is a rapper, math nerd, and Paralympic champion. He lost his left leg due to cancer years ago, which gives him the ability to pull off some really clever Halloween costumes. His 2013 costume may take you a minute to figure out. Oh yes, he's a flamingo, but will he be up for doing this handstand for everyone who asks? Sure, he's an athlete, but that could get old when you're out trying to have Halloween fun. It might be better just to pull out the picture when someone asks him what's with the pink bodysuit and that goofy shoe. -via reddit

(YouTube link)

Marina Shifrin quit her job producing viral videos at at Next Media Animation (the folks who make those crazy Taiwanese news animations), by posting a viral video of herself dancing along with a text explanation.

We hope she already has another job lined up, at a company that doesn't care about page views. We can admire her chutzpah and dedication to her journalism ideals, but we all know that it's hard to get someone to hire you after you've publicly criticized your previous boss. I've seen it happen too many time, and although that taboo tends to insulate bad managers from accountability, that's the way it is.

The music is "Gone" by Kanye West and contains NSFW lyrics.    

The votes are in. With a face only a mother could love (and only then if you were a blobfish mother), the blobfish has been elected by the Ugly Animal Preservation Society (previously at Neatorama) as the world's ugliest animal. As such, the fish will now represent the society as its mascot.

"This is one of the funniest fish faces in the ocean, although you're not likely to see a blobfish since they live in very deep water off Australia. In fact, it's pretty rare for anyone to see blobfish, although they're sometimes taken in nets hauled in by Australia's deepwater fishing fleet. They really do look like a big, blobby tadpole, just a mass of pale, jelly-like flesh with puffy, loose skin, a big nose, and beady, staring eyes. But looking like a floppy water balloon is what actually helps the blobfish make a living. This guy just sort of floats above the sea floor so it doesn't have to spend a lot of energy swimming around, sort of like when you float in the water wearing a life jacket.

The blobfish beat out the axolotl, the proboscis monkey, the dung beetle, and several other hideous creatures. Link -via Metafilter

(Image credit: NOAA)

The views from China's mountain Hua Shan are amazing. On the downside, getting the most out of that view means climbing along the cliffside planks that make up the park's "path."

See those boards with metal pieces jabbed into them? Yeah, those are the path. And that chain? That's the handrail. If you have vertigo or bad balance, you're probably best off just enjoying the view through the great pictures collected by Twisted Sifter.

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