LAS VEGAS—Promising to take the first few rounds really slow for anybody who still needed to get their bearings, entrants in the World Series of Poker reportedly began the tournament this week by playing a full hand face-up so everyone could learn the rules. “Okay, show of hands—how many of you have played poker…
NEW YORK—Cornering the man in a darkened parking garage as he walked toward his car, the Trump boys reportedly attempted to bribe a juror deciding their father’s hush money case Thursday with a briefcase full of Peanut Butter and Grape Jelly Uncrustables. “All it takes is a simple ‘nacho guilty’ [sic] vote to walk…
NEW YORK—In the wake of the landmark trial that made him the first person to both serve as president of the United States and be convicted of a felony, the entire nation reportedly shrugged Thursday after hearing about the 34 guilty charges for Donald J. Trump and then unpaused the most recent episode of MILF Manor.…
It should not be controversial to state that, as it stands today, YouTube’s ContentID platform for policing copyright on YouTube videos is hopelessly broken. The system is wide open to abuse from bad actors who might lay claim to content that simply isn’t theirs, sometimes to the tune of raking in millions of dollars. ContentID is also abused by some in law enforcement to prevent recordings of police from showing up on YouTube. And then of course there are all the times that ContentID simply flags content that it shouldn’t, such as the sound of a cat purring or plain white noise.
And so it isn’t much of a surprise that these issues keep popping up. YouTuber Albino took to social media to complain about how he received a copyright strike for a let’s play video because, well, a home appliance made a noise.
On May 27, 2024, Norwegian YouTuber ‘Albino’ revealed that one of his six-hour playthroughs of Fallout: New Vegas had been given a strike due to supposedly including the song ‘Done’ by music artist Aduego.
However, this track was never actually in Albino’s video. Instead, the audio that plays at that particular point in his playthrough was the jingle from a Samsung washing machine, which plays when a wash cycle is complete.
Sadly, it’s even dumber than that. Apparently this recording by this particular “artist” isn’t a song at all, but just an upload of that same washing machine jingle that’s been on YouTube for nearly a decade. So, some rando records his washing machine jingle, uploads it to YouTube, then registers it with ContentID, and goes around demonetizing other YouTube videos where the jingle plays. And, because of how ContentID is policed — or not —, none of this is caught by anyone at all.
Albino also pointed out the myriad of comments criticizing Aduego underneath his video, with one viewer writing: “Did you record the Samsung washer, then upload it to YouTube with a content ID?” At the time of writing, it appears that Adeugo’s video has been either privated or removed from YouTube.
“This is the most egregious example of the MANY outright fraudulent content ID claims I’ve gotten over the years,” he wrote. “Are you guys doing anything to prevent this? It’s completely out of hand.”
YouTube’s response was of standard fare. It indicated that Albino could dispute the strike and then Adeugo would have 30 days to respond. This of course would open Albino’s channel to the risk of being bounced off the platform completely. Whatever this is, it is obviously not good and sound enforcement of valid copyrights.
But we’ve had a million of these posts on the site over the years and it doesn’t seem to be getting any better. At some point, YouTube is going to have to come to terms that its Content ID system is broken and come up with something better. If all of this can occur because of a washing machine, after all, there’s no hope for far more nuanced copyright claims and issues.
ROSEMONT, IL—Saying the product tasted bad despite having an appearance similar to vanilla pudding, the American Academy of Dermatology issued guidelines Wednesday in which it advised against taking a big bite of facial cream. “We conducted a few tests and found that while skincare products may look velvety smooth and…
As the summer travel season begins, thousands of bags will likely go missing. But not at one particular airport in Japan that makes a stunning claim: it has never lost a piece of luggage.
(Image credit: Tomohiro Ohsumi)
Eight times a year, we award regional Federal Reserve Banks with our coveted Beigie Award. While the anecdotes within the Beige Book offer us fascinating looks into the economy, to others, it can be difficult to make anything of the stories they tell. That's why we're giving out a special Beigie award today to some economists who found a way to use anecdotes to peer into our economic future.
Regional Economic Sentiment: Constructing Quantitative Estimates from the Beige Book and Testing Their Ability to Forecast Recessions
For sponsor-free episodes of The Indicator from Planet Money, subscribe to Planet Money+ via Apple Podcasts or at plus.npr.org.
Music by Drop Electric. Find us: TikTok, Instagram, Facebook, Newsletter.
They found one another. Of course they did. It doesn’t matter how. Fate finds a way.
I see some of them sunglass-faced sitting outside of cafés laughing over espressos, playfully touching elbows. I know they’re whispering about me after they make love—two heads on one pillow, tracing the chin of the other.
Another two pair up, vacation across Italy together, and pose for pics in front of beautiful sunsets and seas stretching into horizons. They look so happy because they are. Of course they are. Why wouldn’t they be? They have nothing in common but me—and that’s all the bond they seem to need.
A couple of my exes find another couple of my exes and double-date. Those four find another four, those eight another eight. This goes on—a big bang of sorts, a chain reaction. My multiple pasts expand exponentially into a future, coalescing. The gravity sinks in. There are larger dinner parties, planned camping trips. They meet parents, exchange holiday gifts, celebrate birthdays.
Things get serious. All my exes marry each other, blend into one big family, buy one big house for all of them to live in harmony. They honeymoon in Paris together—all of them grinning in front of more vistas. They tag each other online, flood my feed even when I’ve unfollowed each one months ago. Years ago. Millenia ago. But somehow, they’re all here, defying an algorithm, sharing one sunset, blissful smiles frozen across all their faces, all holding hands in one big circle—the hands clasping tighter in joy, the circle closing in toward a group embrace, a wedding band around the ring finger of each ex, circles within circles.
All my exes form a flawless sphere that grows so wonderfully heavy with love that it tips a critical mass, collapses on itself, rips a hole through space toward a perfect singularity, creates a new existence on the other side of this one, births a beginning by killing this end making sure I’ll never reach through. It’s physics, after all.
Science says what’ll happen next: all I’ll see is all of them stuck forever on an event horizon, finally happy, beaming with peace, while all they’ll see when they look back at my universe speeding through time is star after star slowly dimming, planets drifting out of orbit so far from each other, and my world—once ours—growing so cold.
If it’s almost the end of the month, that means Eric and Matt have once again scrambled to answer your most urgent questions. And given the busy weather month we’ve had in May, this edition of our Q&A is particularly timely. Got your own queries? Hit the Feedback button in the blog’s sidebar, respond here with a comment on hit us up on our many, many social network feeds: X, Facebook, Instagram, Threads, Mastodon and Bluesky. We’re everywhere, and now that includes LinkedIn!
–Dwight
Q. I feel like y’all are being TOO underwhelming. I definitely get not overhyping the weather. Which is absolutely why I started following you. But the last three storms you’ve underhyped and I was not prepared. I’d rather be over prepared than under. I didn’t at all expect the insanity that Oak Forest got on [May 16]. Thank goodness my cousin texted me to take shelter minutes before the storm hit. Please consider a middle ground.
A. This isn’t a question. Next one, please.
Just kidding. It’s a fair comment. The reality is that just as we don’t ‘over-hype’ the weather we also try not to ‘under-hype’ the forecast. Matt and I really are trying to simply be as right as we can be. You mentioned under-hyping the last three storms. That’s not true. On May 13, we predicted significant hail could accompany strong thunderstorms as they moved through the Houston area. Some areas, we said, may see hail as “large as an apple.” In reality, no one saw much, if any hail that day. I realize that pointing out how we missed on another forecast is perhaps not the best defense of our record. But my point is that we do not actively seek to under-hype storms. We are striving, always, for the middle ground you espouse. Some days, however, it’s damn hard to find.
I’m also sorry you felt unprepared for the derecho that slammed Oak Forest and other parts of Houston. We wrote about that recently, and some of the learnings we are taking away from it.
–Eric
Q: During the recent extraordinary Houston area (and beyond) weather phenomenon, is there any consideration that “microbursts” were present?
A: Yes, in our post about derechos, we noted that basically, they’re gigantic bursts of straight-line winds. In a sense, you could probably refer to a derecho event almost like a macroburst, which is wind damage on a scale greater than two and a half miles long. In reality, within this complex storm, there were probably a mix of macrobursts and smaller-scale microbursts, in addition to a couple tornadoes. We did not exactly see uniform damage across the area, but clearly some neighborhoods were harder hit than others. The more meaningful answer is that it’s all semantics in a situation like that, and the widespread damage is damage.
–Matt
Q. This storm has sobered us for what we are in for this hurricane season. How do you prepare? What do we need to keep in stock? What food should we store up?
A. Whoa, hurricane season officially starts Saturday! Fortunately, it doesn’t look like things will be insane right out of the gate. But there’s no doubt it’s going to be a busy season. The most important thing you can do right now is understand your vulnerabilities. Is your home at risk of storm surge because you live near the coast, and at a low elevation? Are you at risk of inland flooding? Is your home built to withstand hurricane-force winds, i.e. does your roof have hurricane clips? Are you willing to go without electricity for a week or three in September? All of these questions are important to determine in what circumstances you would evacuate. And after you understand when you would evacuate, you should make a plan for where you would go, what you would take, and how you will get there.
More generally, I find the preparation section on the Ready.gov website to be useful in making plans for an evacuation or to ride out the storm.
–Eric
Q: Is there any connection between the kind of intense spring weather we’ve been having and how hot the summer will be? Or are we most apt to have a drought when spring weather is severe?
A: The simple answer is not really. If you look at enough meteorological variables, you can find loose correlations among a lot of things. But correlation does not always (or often) mean causation. The best proxy to an “intense” spring may be storm reports in Harris County. If I take the five busiest years prior to this one from March through May, I can find 2007, 2019, 2020, 2023, and 2009 as my analogs. Combined, you get the map here:
So yes, those active springs have led to hot summers on net. 2023 was our hottest summer on record, 2019 was the fifth hottest, 2009 was the seventh hottest, and 2020 was the tenth hottest. But years like 2011, 2022, and 2010 are on the top ten list as well and saw few severe reports in spring. In terms of drought, it gets a little noisier with some dry years mixed in with wetter ones. So no real solid signal.
We expect a hot summer this year, but it’s not because of the intense spring thunderstorms. The combination of a very warm Gulf, a post El Niño warm hangover, climate change, and other factors buoy confidence in the hot summer expectation. Severe weather does not. But it does make for a fun exercise.
–Matt
Q: I’m a bit confused about the tornado warning terms used here in Texas. It seems like there is a different meaning to the terms than what I am accustomed to. Could you clarify the Texas tornado warning system in one of your posts? ( As a Midwestern Indiana girl, I learned that a tornado watch was when the conditions were likely for a tornado and a warning was when a tornado was spotted, heading your way and you needed to take cover immediately.)
A: The tornado watch vs. warning system is the same anywhere in America. A tornado watch means that conditions are favorable for possible tornadoes. A tornado warning means that forecasters have identified a likely tornado or an in-progress tornado via radar or visual observations from people in the field. In a nutshell, a watch means you should pay attention while a warning means you should take immediate action.
We get a lot of tornado warnings in the Houston area. Since 2020, there have been 136 of them issued by the NWS Houston office. The typical tornado we get here is a little different than what you see in the Plains or Midwest. Our tornadoes here are most often quick spin ups in squall lines (what we call QLCS tornadoes) or brief south to north moving supercells in the spring or fall ahead of cold fronts. Also, tropical systems. Harvey alone in 2017 led to over 140 tornado warnings. The QLCS and tropical tornadoes are a bit like playing whack-a-mole because they usually flare up and weaken rather quickly or sometimes look like they’re about to produce a tornado and do not. In the Midwest, you often have a little time to see them coming. Here, it’s just a different reality.
That said, after the derecho this month, I think that it’s apparent that folks should take these warnings seriously, even if they are inconvenient at times.
–Matt
Q. Can you please not use an apple as a comparison tool for the size of hail possible? Is it an gala apple? Is it a red apple? Is it a green apple? Is it a honeycrisp apple? Is it a pink lady apple? Is it some random miniature apple? Or is it ping pong to baseball sized?? 1.5 to 3.5 inches wide or 3.8 to 8.9 centimeters wide is easily accessible to most people. And fun fact the National Geodetic Survey (NGS) has updated their definition of a foot as of 2022 to better match international standards. An apple is completely subjective.
A. You forgot the most important argument in favor of apples. They’re delicious.
But just like my Granny Smith, you make a good point. The next time I’m writing a post on my McIntosh computer, and we’re expecting hail, I’ll try not to be so confuji in our terminology. Honey, I’ll try to be crisp in our language. Hope you find that apeeling.
–Eric
In brief: In the absence of high pressure, Houston’s atmosphere remains open to the passing of shortwave disturbances over the coming days. At this point Friday looks like it could see the most organized showers and thunderstorms, and the greatest chance of damaging winds, hail, and heavy rainfall. By Sunday storm chances start to wane, with next week looking warmer and mostly sunny.
Skies will be partly sunny today, with high temperatures in the upper 80s. Like on Wednesday, this daytime heating should lead to the development of showers and thunderstorms during the period of 3 to 9 pm. Some of these could become severe. However, at this time I think chances are better along and north of Interstate 10, rather than closer to the coast. (Speaking of coastal areas, I wanted to shout-out the senior class of Clear Creek High School, where I’ve gotten to know a lot of great kids. Enjoy graduation this evening!) Lows tonight will be in the upper 70s.
Like on Wednesday, we’ll be monitoring the potential for storm development closely, and if the forecast for today or Friday changes significantly we will update the site accordingly this afternoon.
At this point it looks like a more organized round of storms will move into the Houston area on Friday morning, likely sweeping into Houston around sunrise, give or take. This system will offer the best chance of severe weather, including damaging winds and hail. Depending on the severity of this system, there may be a second round of storms with daytime heating in the afternoon. (I.e. if the morning storms are weaker, there will be a better chance of a second round later in the day). Bottom line: If you need to be out and about tomorrow morning, be weather aware.
I would guess that most of Houston see an additional 1 to 2 inches of rain through Friday, but my concern is for higher bullseyes in stronger thunderstorms. At this point, Friday evening looks to see a break in showers. Daytime highs will be in the upper 80s.
Our atmosphere will remain unsettled into the weekend, especially for Saturday. I don’t have much confidence in the details yet, but we could see another round of showers during the daytime on Saturday. These storms, at this point, do not look particularly severe. Highs, otherwise, should be around 90 degrees with partly sunny skies.
We may see some additional showers on Sunday morning, but I’m far from confident in that. Skies, otherwise, should be partly sunny with temperatures in the low 90s. If you have outdoor plans later in the day or evening on Sunday, I’d feel at least somewhat confident in them.
As high pressure settles in next week we’ll revert to mostly sunny skies and warmer temperatures. Highs should be pushing into the mid-90s toward the end of the week. Rain chances are low, probably close to zero. So it goes in summer under such a pressure system.
Benjamin Johnson Fortson, Jr., a businessman and philanthropist who helped found the Kimbell Art Museum in Fort Worth, died Sunday, May 19, 2024.
Benjamin Johnson Fortson, Jr. Image courtesy of the Kimbell Art Museum.
Ben Fortson was born in Fort Worth on June 9, 1932, to parents Benjamin Johnson Fortson, Sr. and Katherine Stripling Luckett. At a young age, Mr. Fortson accompanied his father on a trip to visit an oil derrick, an experience that left a lasting impression and later influenced his decision to go into the oil and gas industry.
After studying at the University of Texas at Austin, Mr. Fortson joined the U.S. Army in 1953. Following his service, he completed a business degree at Texas Christian University in Fort Worth. Mr. Fortson started as a landman at Champlin Oil in Oklahoma City and formed the Fortson Oil Company in the early 1960s. During his four-decade career, he drilled oil wells across the U.S.
Mr. Fortson married Kay Kimbell Carter in 1957. She was the only child of Dr. Coleman Carter and his wife Mattie, and was the niece of Kay Kimbell, an entrepreneur and art patron. Because Mr. Kimbell and his wife Velma did not have children, Mr. and Mrs. Fortson became responsible for bringing her uncle’s vision of a first-class museum to life.
A remembrance shared by the Kimbell Art Museum noted that while Mr. Fortson often downplayed his role at the museum, he was “engaged from the museum’s early years and the opening of the acclaimed Louis I. Kahn building in 1972, and he was the driving force behind the construction of the Kimbell’s Renzo Piano Pavilion.” Mr. Fortson also served as the Executive Vice President and Chief Investment Officer at the Kimbell Art Foundation for over 50 years.
Eric M. Lee, the Director of the Kimbell Art Museum said, “We will forever remember Ben as a kind and wise leader whose impact on the Kimbell — especially through the building of the Piano Pavilion and his oversight of the Kimbell’s investments and finances for half a century — is incalculable. He was a true gentleman, and his devotion to the Kimbell, always accompanied by grace and a sense of humor, was profound. He leaves a powerful and enduring legacy.”
The post Ben Fortson, 1932 – 2024 appeared first on Glasstire.
This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager.
A reader writes:
After four interviews and a performance assessment, the company has signaled that they plan to make me an offer next week. I’m excited! But the tricky part is that we haven’t discussed salary expectations on either side. At all. They didn’t share a range, and they haven’t asked for mine. I wish I had asked, but it never seemed like the right time.
My number for happily accepting is $130K, based on my current salary and my understanding of the job’s demands. But my research suggests this may be on the high end of what I can expect.
• If they offer $130K+: Phew. I’ll ask if they can get closer to $140K, knowing I can simply accept if they can’t do it.
• If they offer $120K: Should I still ask if they can get closer to $140K? Is that too much to be a casual request?
• If they offer less than $120K: Now I’m worried we’re too far apart to meet. Do I keep going for $140K with the aim of settling at $130K? Or if the initial offer is $110-115K, is it better to be more frank and share that my baseline for making the move is $130K? If I can get them to agree, will they expect me to massively overdeliver?
• What if they ask for my number first? That would be weird at the offer stage but it could happen, right? Should I just come out and say I’m hoping for $140K?
More broadly, do you think I’m in a better or worse position because we haven’t anchored expectations? Some say to put it off for as long as you can, but I feel a little foolish for having invested so much in this process without knowing whether my needs exceed their budget.
Yeah, four interviews and a performance assessment is a lot to invest without having talked about the salary at all. If they offer $115K and won’t budge, are you going to be pissed that you invested all that time? If so, that’s a sign to raise it earlier on next time.
As for strategy from here:
• If they offer $130K+: Yes, just say, “I’m really excited about the role! Any chance you could get closer to $140K?” knowing you’ll accept even if they can’t.
• If they offer $120K: Asking for $140K is a pretty big leap. Since you’d happily accept at $130K, I’d say this: “I’m really excited about the role. Any chance you can go up to $130K? If so, I’d love to accept.”
• If they offer less than $120K: “I’m really excited about the role. I want to be up-front that the number I’ve had in mind based on the market and the role is $130K. If you can go up to that, I’d love to accept.” As for your question about whether you’d be expected to massively overdeliver if they do it, probably not but pay attention to their cues. If they seem really hesitant, I’d be more wary (both of that and of whether your raises will be super limited afterwards).
• If they ask you for a number first, that would indeed be weird at the offer stage and probably won’t happen. But if they do, you have two choices: You can turn it back on them and ask, “What did you have budgeted for the role?” (Believe me, they have an idea.) Or, since you’re at the end of the process and you’re clear on what it would take for you to accept, you can just tell them what that number is (maybe framing it as “130s” so you’re not anchoring yourself at $130K). Normally I’d recommend the former, but in this case I don’t think the latter is a horrible move.
Pope Francis has apologized for using a derogatory term about gay men in a discussion with Italian bishops during which he reaffirmed the Catholic Church’s ban on gay priests, a policy that stands at odds with previous statements that there is room for everyone in the Catholic church. What do you think?
An Ohio golf course on the site of 2,000-year-old ceremonial mounds and burial grounds of the Hopewell Earthworks system refused a payment of $2 million for the World Heritage Site, leaving it up to a jury to decide what the site is worth before turning the land over to historical society. What do you think?
TULSA, OK—Emphasizing that both applause and audible cheering are mandatory, the artist rider in singer-songwriter Kyle Tatum’s contract stipulates that local venue the Vanguard must provide the musician with all the validation he never got, according to a copy of the agreement viewed Thursday. “In addition to a case…
CHICAGO—Blaming platforms like TikTok and YouTube for the fad’s proliferation, experts expressed their concern and bewilderment Wednesday over the last will and testament craze sweeping the nation’s tween girls. “They seem to not understand, or simply not care, that creating a last will and testament at their young…
WASHINGTON—As part of a new nationwide etiquette initiative, a dialect coach was reportedly hired Wednesday to class up the American public before its big date with a wealthy man. “Enunciate! For God’s sake, enunciate!” barked the elocution professional, who grew more and more incensed, rubbing his face with the…
T-Mobile plans to acquire most of UScellular, including its stores, some of its spectrum assets, and its customers, in a $4.4B deal, including up to $2B of debt cnbc.com
Google's UniSuper snafu was a public cloud warning to telcos lightreading.com
iFixit ends Samsung deal as oppressive repair shop requirements come to light arstechnica.com
More Sprint Merger Synergies As T-Mobile Raises Wireless Rates techdirt.com
YouTube rolls out Playables, a collection of over 75 free games available on mobile and desktop, to all users techcrunch.com
TikTok Challenge To US Ban Law Gets September Hearing silicon.co.uk
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This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager.
Last week, I asked about the strangest things you’ve ever seen in cover letters and resumes. You shared some amazing stories — here are some of my favorites.
1. “A candidate happily let me know ‘I just got laid this morning’ (I assume he meant ‘laid off’ but it made me laugh).”
2. “I had one applicant who put ‘Have spent less than 8 nights incarcerated’ on his resume.”
3. “At a previous job, I was assisting the head teacher with applications for a class teacher position. One lady wrote the entire application from the perspective of her hand puppet. The hand puppet had apparently filled in the application on behalf of the candidate. The best thing about it was that she included photos of her and the puppet working together on projects, e.g. in the garden, painting. I’m laughing now remembering it.”
4. “I work in law. We once had an applicant openly state in their cover letter that their career goal was to work for opposing counsel, so they wanted a job at our firm to do opposition recon and learn how to better take us down in the future.”
5. “I had a cover letter where a guy talked about navigating his divorce as relevant experience. This was a legal job, but it was not a family law job or adjacent, and the time was very much ‘I succeeded over my evil ex.’ So not appropriate.”
6. “Among other very silly things, a prospective intern that I was scheduled to interview included the bullet point ‘Powerful voice and charismatic aura’ on his resume. He ended up being a no-show for the interview, but I sorely wish I’d gotten to meet him.”
7. “I once received a cover letter that stated, ‘I’m highly allergic to pet dander and I have three cats. I am determined and will bring this level of commitment to your company.'”
8. “Once had a candidate write, ‘Strong typing skills,’ followed by, ‘WPM: 20.'”
9. “One of my friends received a totally bonkers resume from a candidate who declared, ‘I have run a background check on myself and I have a clean record.'”
10. “When I worked in corporate HR for a well-known convenience store based in the Philly area, I received a resume printed on a used sandwich wrapper from one of our stores. Complete with grease spots and smelling of rancid food. I give the person points for creativity, but for the love of all that’s holy, I wish they would have used a clean, unused wrapper.”
11. “Received an email attachment (PDF) which I opened expecting to see a resume. It was a picture of the candidate, leaning back in a desk chair, with his hands pointing towards his chest. A superimposed box over his chest simply had the words: ‘Hire me!’ No resume at all.”
12. “My favorite was under ‘other experience’: ”I’m extremely reliable. I once had 17 tequila shots on a night out and still made it to work the next day.'”
13. “I once received a resume where the applicant had used an online service to generate a multi-page PDF with extreme background graphics that looked more like a sales document for a product than an actual resume. Worse, he hadn’t fully edited the whole thing, so page 1 started with a greeting of ‘Hey, wonderful’ and proceeded through instructions for using the template, including something along the lines of ‘this start-to-finish document will guide you through the process of putting your best foot forward.’
Spoiler: he did not put his best foot forward, and he did not get an interview.”
14. “A favorite was a candidate who clearly took to heart the importance of quantifying accomplishments their interest section said something like ‘Exercise 6x/week for 3 years, increasing bicep circumference by 70% and decreasing waist circumference by 10%.'”
15. “An applicant wrote in his resume, ‘I only write the personal pronoun ‘I’ as ‘i.’ Contact me to find out why!’
Honestly, I was so annoyed by this I decided no matter what the rest of his resume looked like, we would not call him. Luckily the rest of it ensured he wouldn’t have gotten a call back anyway.”
16. “Mid-40s man in tech listed ‘grew largest pumpkin at the county fair, won a blue ribbon.’ His resume was otherwise excellent, so he got an interview.
At the end of the interview, they asked if he had any questions, and he wondered why they didn’t ask him about his pumpkin. The interviewer said, ‘Tell me more about that then, and how you see it relating to the work we do here.’
It happened when he was 12, he ‘didn’t remember much’ about how he did it, he just thought it was what made him unique.”
17. “I’ve had several candidates who listed Olympic records, although not a single one was actually on the Olympic team, had verifiable records, or even possible. I had one 40-year-old candidate who stated that she won an Olympic medal in 1990. She would have been under the age of 10.”
18. “At a nonprofit internship several years ago, I was tasked with receiving applications in the general mailbox and forwarding them to the relevant hiring managers, as there were many open positions in several countries overseas.
One applicant sent in a resume which had, in the lower left corner, a pretty big cartoon image of the genie from Aladdin coming out of his lamp. Then a blue speech bubble coming out of his mouth and filling the page. Inside the speech bubble was the actual resume (in smaller font, as the genie, lamp and bubble took up a fair amount of space on the page).
He was not hired.”
19. “An applicant who was about 45 (based on high school grad date) listed every award received in elementary school. Nothing for middle or high school, just elementary and started with perfect attendance in kindergarten.”
20. “From two different resumes:
‘The first thing to say is that I’m nobody special.’ — In the summary section.
‘Too many to list. Seriously. 10+ years.’ — In the skills section.”
21. “A few years ago, I worked as a resume writer for a questionable career coaching company until it folded. Most clients would fight me tooth and nail if I said something needed to come out of their resume, and the career coach would back them up, so most of these bad boys clogged up someone’s inbox. Some of the best things I saw include:
* Demanded their resume highlight winning three erotic fan fiction contests in their awards and license section (medical field, did not get an interview).
* Citing over a decade of successfully hosting an unlicensed ayahuasca retreat in their home (elementary education, did not get an interview).
* ‘I probably know more than management does about INDUSTRY TOPIC’ in the ‘about me’ section, applying for a job in which he had no education or experience (cybersecurity, did not get an interview).
* Insisted that ‘never cheated on my wife or been tempted to cheat with a coworker regardless of mutual attraction’ stayed in the special skills section (media, did not get an interview).”
22. “My friend in recruiting once received a 60-page CV, consisting of solid text and screenshots of the candidate’s IQ test results, recruiter inMails (to show how in-demand he was, I guess), feedback from previous recruiters (he highlighted that a previous recruiter had declared him the ‘most intelligent candidate they’d ever interviewed’ – but didn’t mention whether he was offered the job), that he’d recently attended a reading bootcamp that improved his reading comprehension to 2000 wpm, and – my absolute highlight – a summary of his EQ test results that showed he had a self-awareness EQ of 120.”
23. “My mom, a nurse, had ‘looks good in white’ on her resume and got hired. It was the 60s/70s, a different time. She is still a nut.”
24. “We had an intern who applied for a full-time role a couple years later … and his resume listed the accomplishments of our ENTIRE TEAM over the summer when he had interned. Cool that he was paying attention to what all of us were working on, I guess? But it was so clearly an impossible scope for a single intern and he was applying to the exact same team with all the same people. I’ll never know what led him to think that was a good move.”
25. “On his resume for a serving position, “glowing tan” was its own bullet point on a list of skills.”
26. “Applicant put in fake experience. Unfortunately, he put in my job as his current fake job — a job I’ve held for 10 years. I guess he didn’t realize he’d be reporting into me. Another applicant had one line of actual job experience, and a whole page of his tennis accomplishments, including children’s tournaments he’d won 15 years ago. As a child.”
27. “One candidate listed ‘High social status’ as a quality. I emailed him and he explained that he had a large following on social media.”
28. “My place of work has an online application for candidates to fill out. Under their work history, one applicant answered the question of who was their supervisor at previous position with ‘Barbara.’ The answer to the follow-up question ‘Why did you leave this position?’: ‘Barbara.'”
29. “My three favorites of all time (hiring non-attorney positions in a midsize, fairly conservative business law firm). None were invited to interview, but number three was very close:
1. Perfectly fine resume for accounting position, but cover letter indicated they had been “screwed” by lawyers multiple times and wanted the job to prevent that from happening to others.
2. Gentleman with a skill listed as strong research skills, with a recent five-year “employment” stint listed as author and a link to his self-published fetish novel.
3. Good relevant prior experience, but the current position listed was a year-long stint as Miss BDSM OurState.”
30. “From the Personal Interests / Accomplishments section:
‘Scented Candles
• I own 50+ scented candles covering every season of the year and give optimal recommendations using a calculated analysis on season, location, environment, event, personal preference, and vibe.'”
31. “My heartfelt apologies to the original applicant wherever they may be now, but this section header of their cover letter has always stuck with me: ‘From whence did this stranger come to us in our hour of need?’ Love the confidence.”
32. “Some job sites allow you to add soft skills to your application and ask you to list when this trait took effect. I’ve seen a lot of resumes that read things like ‘Enthusiasm (less than 1 year).'”
33. “I’m currently hiring for a student worker position and received a resume that was just a screenshot of the candidate’s notes app on his phone. It included his full date of birth and age, at least five discrete fonts, and ‘good at video games’ in the skills section. Also, the screenshot was not cropped, and his phone battery was at like 5%. We will not be interviewing this person, but I’m secretly kinda bummed I won’t get to meet someone who sounds like truly a top-tier agent of chaos.”
34. “The marketing candidate who sent a half of a dollar bill with his cover letter stating we would get the other half once we interviewed him. He was not interviewed.”
35. “I saw a resume that included the line, ‘Personal interests: none.’ Not sure if he trying to signal how dedicated he was to his work?”
Stumble inside and you will be fed daily for free. No heat. Bucket provided for waste. $950/mo.
Hovertext:
The part of the impression that gets the most laughs is when the robot imitates living an entire life pursuing other people's dreams.
WASHINGTON—Admitting with a sigh that they couldn’t believe it was somehow time to go back to work already, downtrodden sources confirmed Tuesday that before they even knew it, Memorial Day weekend was over. The sources, who came from all ages, races, incomes, and genders, begrudgingly told reporters that although…
In brief: A line of severe storms is likely to affect much of the greater Houston area this afternoon. Please be weather aware as you venture out between now and about 5 pm CT.
As of noon, a strong line of thunderstorms has developed near College Station and Huntsville, and it should move steadily southward this afternoon. The time of most concern for the Houston metro area will be from 1 pm to 5 pm, as the system pushes into central parts of the city and down to the coast. Not all of Houston will see severe weather, but a good portion of the metro area is likely to be affected.
Please note that, as of this time, we are not expecting the derecho-like weather that Houston experienced about 10 days ago. However, there is the potential for severe thunderstorms, and that includes the usual threats.
In terms of rainfall, I expect that much of the area will receive 1 to 3 inches, but as these storms move into Houston they could slow somewhat due to interaction with the Gulf of Mexico seabreeze. In this case we could see some higher isolated totals of 4 or more inches of rainfall. As for hail, I think a high-end size would be ping pong ball-sized hail. Straight-line winds could reach up to 60 mph. It is also possible that we see some isolated tornadoes.
The worst of this mess should push through by the late afternoon or early evening hours. As a result of this storm system, my expectation is for quieter weather tonight.
Matt and I will be tracking these storms closely, and if there are changes in the forecast we will update the site.
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