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19 Dec 12:53

AI Meeting Summary: Appointing the Next CEO at United Healthcare

by Frank Jackson

Lewis began by conveying appreciation to the upper management team for the way they had all rallied together despite the unpleasantness of recent events and expressed he was more confident than ever in the future of the company. It was, however, time to move on to the next era of UnitedHealthcare, and in the interests of getting back to business, he was pleased to announce that Larry would be taking over as the new CEO of the company.

The announcement was met with scattered applause emojis as Larry thanked everyone and said that while this was certainly a proud day for him, and he was thankful for the honor, he felt Kevin would be the best hire for CEO instead.

Kevin seemed taken aback by this turn of events and said no, no, no, and reiterated that Larry was the right man to be the next CEO of UnitedHealthcare and that Larry had his full support.

Larry sputtered out that Kevin was far more qualified than he was and that it was Kevin’s strategy of increased litigation to fight repayment fees that had dramatically increased Q3 profits, so Kevin definitely deserved to be CEO.

To which Kevin said whooooa, whoa, whoa, whoa, that wasn’t his idea, and Larry said that at the time, he was more than happy to take all the credit. Kevin praised the acquisition of NeverHealth under Larry’s direction, enabling algorithmic care recommendations for sick patients based on the NeverHealth value-based system.

Then Stacy interjected that the algorithm did have a known error rate of 90 percent, at which point inaudible murmuring spread throughout the call until Greg said as chief legal adviser he could attest that internally, yes, they did know the error rate existed, but they had thus far found ways to dismiss each of the lawsuits in court so the whole thing was actually something of a success.

Kevin hollered and whooped his arms in a frenzy and said, yes, let’s hear it for Larry, and tried inciting a thirty-second chanting of Larry’s name, which no one else took part in.

Larry sat very still in his seat until Kevin’s chanting died down. He calmly stated that everything was fine and that his first act as CEO would be stepping down and giving the job to Kevin.

Kevin said no, no, no, and that Larry couldn’t do that, however Lewis expressed a desire to wrap this up, which everyone agreed with, and gave the order to send out the press release announcing Kevin’s promotion.

Kevin began openly weeping and saying dear god, please don’t do this. Lewis attempted to console Kevin and raised the point that CEO was the most prestigious position in the company, and between the pay increase and networking opportunities, Kevin would be set for life.

Larry repeated the phrase “for life” while using his fingers as air quotes, and Greg responded with a laughter emoji. Kevin blubbered to Lewis that if he thought being CEO was so great, then maybe Lewis should be CEO, and Lewis laughed for an unusual amount of time and finally said there was no chance in hell of that happening.

Stacy announced the press release had been sent out. Lewis congratulated Kevin and told him he was now the face of UnitedHealthcare.

Kevin stared in silence with sad emoji, which Lewis took as a cue to conclude the call.

A few of the members offered support for Kevin before logging off, saying things like tough break, kid, and Larry expressed to Kevin that now was probably a good time to make sure Kevin had the best most comprehensive insurance available.

19 Dec 00:40

update: how to tell my boss his second-in-commands are making it impossible for me to do my job

by Ask a Manager

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager.

It’s “where are you now?” month at Ask a Manager, and all December I’m running updates from people who had their letters here answered in the past.

There will be more posts than usual this week, so keep checking back throughout the day.

Remember the letter-writer asking how to tell her boss that his second-in-commands were making it impossible for her to do her job (#5 at the link)? The first update was here, and here’s the latest.

I thought this saga was over, but I have yet another, now definitely final, update to this mess.

YOU WERE ALL RIGHT AND I WAS WRONG BUT NOT FOR THE REASONS YOU MIGHT THINK.

Long story short — I’m no longer working at that company. I was white-anted and thrown under the bus, but not by either of the Goons, in fact, Goon 2 reached out to me after I resigned to send his well-wishes.

The Judas among us was my admin. Who I had hired, trained, and covered for countless times whilst wondering how on earth she was so “overwhelmed” with her workload whilst I was trying desperately to take things off her plate to lighten her load whilst drowning under my own workload. Well, it was because she was spending all her time actively subverting me to my peers and my director.

I could never understand why it was that despite my work being of a high quality, a proven record of saving the company tens of thousands of dollars in my first few months there, and external counterparts singing my praises, I still persistently was being undermined, not listened to, and generally bullied by a few of my colleagues. I then started being “performance managed” by the director, despite my work quality staying the same and still garnering praise from other colleagues. The director could never explain exactly why he was performance managing me, and I was never placed on a PIP, he just made it exceptionally difficult for me to do my job effectively.

It was because my admin had been spreading abhorrent lies about me in an effort to find herself in my chair, without understanding exactly how uncomfortable and soul-sucking that chair was.

I had been asked to find a confirmation email in the inbox that I shared with my admin, but when I searched for it, another email popped up from my admin to my director which was filled with accusations about me which were either greatly exaggerated or outright lies. An example of an exaggeration was her assertion that “MyName demanded I tell her whether I’m planning to have another baby and when, which made me feel intimidated and is illegal to ask.” What had actually occurred was that she told me one day that she was thinking of having another baby, and I had made a joke that she should let me know when so I could get pregnant at the same time and we could have maternity leave together and have a break from work. She laughed, I laughed, I thought that was the end of it. An example of an outright lie was that she said that at an industry awards night, I had gotten so drunk that I attempted to proposition her husband. In reality, I had two glasses of wine that night, and I’ve never met her husband.

She also accused me of taking credit for her work, which had absolutely never happened, in fact, I frequently, in a misguided attempt to help boost her confidence, gave her credit for my work.

The email was about 3 pages long, concluding with, “I don’t even know what she does, but you’re paying her a lot of money to do nothing all day.”

As I finished reading it, everything made sense. I decided then that if she wanted my job so badly, she could have it, and typed out my letter of resignation with immediate effect.

The reason she didn’t know what I did all day was because it was way out of her scope of understanding. I didn’t tell her what I was doing because she was not capable of assisting me with it. Whilst she was dressing up as an office mascot and writing the office newsletter, I was desperately trying to fill all the compliance gaps that if discovered would have the company shut down.

So I left. I told a few of the office big mouths what had happened, and I’ve since heard that the story has gotten out, they have indeed lost an important accreditation (that I initially secured for them), and that their financial situation is not great. Meanwhile, I’m now working in consulting, and am slowly but surely recovering from the horrific burnout and depression that that company left me with.

I never realized just how toxic that workplace was, but your readers did. I should have listened then, and I would’ve saved myself much heartache and ill-health. But things are looking up now, and I hope that if I ever find myself in an environment like that again, I’ll spot it sooner and GTFO.

19 Dec 00:33

updates: I don’t want to be pied in the face for work, and more

by Ask a Manager

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager.

It’s “where are you now?” month at Ask a Manager, and all December I’m running updates from people who had their letters here answered in the past. Here are four updates from past letter-writers.

1. I don’t want to be pied in the face for work

Thank you again for the response to my letter and situation. It was really nice to see that I wasn’t unhinged for thinking it wasn’t acceptable to be pied in the face, and you had some very good advice regarding not needing to be a top performer to be exempt from humiliating work affairs. It’s something I would certainly believe for others, but not for me—so I needed the reality check that I could count myself in the “no one has to be pied in the face if they don’t want to!” category. The commenters were also quite kind and I truly did appreciate the solidarity from most folks.

My update isn’t very exciting beyond good news, which is I have moved on from this workplace before anything came of the pies. This was just the tip of the whipped cream iceberg of a foundational mismatch between me and other managers at the previous place. I am much happier now that interactions like that one are not my daily norm.

I’m not sure if the pies are still happening, but we can only hope that if it is, it’s opt-in, not opt-out. I opted out more permanently. :)

Cheers for the advice and nice aim!

2. My coworker made a creepy pass at me (#2 at the link; first update here)

I am a religious reader of AAM and love update season. I thought you all might enjoy another update on my situation with Mac. I can’t believe it’s been over a year!

Mac never said anything sexualizing or out of line to me again. We never got back to the kind of easy work friendship we had previously, but things were cordial and while not necessarily warm they weren’t chilly either.

Unfortunately something eventually came out that likely cements his comments as less innocent than he portrayed them in his apology: he was having an affair and his wife is divorcing him. He’s moved out of the neighborhood and no longer works here, which I’m grateful for. This new development definitely made it harder to assume he didn’t know exactly what he was doing with his comments.

Thanks again for opening my eyes last year and to all the commenters that helped me find my gumption. I still can’t believe I pulled that line with a straight face, and it still feels amazing that I did. And thanks for all the wisdom and entertainment over the years! Can’t wait to keep reading more.

3. Are these interview red flags? (#3 at the link)

Thank you, Alison and the commenters, for giving me a gut check. Shockingly, the day after I wrote to you, I heard from HR that they were proceeding with putting together an offer for me, and asked for my references. HR told my references that they were giving me an offer, and let me know that all the reviews of me were glowing and the team was really excited about bringing me on.

After you posted my letter, I was thinking about withdrawing my candidacy, but decided that having the information on what compensation they’d offer me for the role was worth having, so I planned to hang in there until that point, when I could decline. Well, the joke was on me. For another six weeks I kept being told that the offer was forthcoming, delayed for various approvals (it was with leadership, with the new CEO, with the parent company). Finally I called HR after two weeks of radio silence and asked for an update. At that point they told me that they might not in fact be giving me an offer after all, because the hiring manager had identified someone else they were now interested in and wanted to interview. I thanked them for their time and the following Monday withdrew from consideration. The entire process took four months, and I never once heard from the hiring manager or the team, everything was run through HR (yet another huge red flag).

The process was eye opening in its own right and a really great reminder that if a company treats you badly and is a complete mess during the hiring process, it can only go downhill from there. Thank you to the AAM community such great perspective!

4. Communicating with a team that doesn’t read email (#2 at the link)

As some of the commenters correctly guessed, management wasn’t a good fit for me. I made a lateral move to a non-management role at the same organization. I’m making the same amount of money (still, uh, not a lot) but I’m MUCH happier in my new role and I have all kinds of ideas for how to improve my little corner of this place!

18 Dec 23:06

In darkest hour, ghost of Pierre Trudeau visits son to ask if Kim Cattrall still got it

by Ian MacIntyre

OTTAWA – With Justin Trudeau facing perhaps his greatest political challenge, the ghost of his late father, former Prime Minister Pierre Elliott Trudeau, appeared before him to ask the pressing question of whether former girlfriend Kim Cattrall is still foxy as hell. “Dad, please, my own Economic Minister just quit and I’m polling to lose […]

The post In darkest hour, ghost of Pierre Trudeau visits son to ask if Kim Cattrall still got it appeared first on The Beaverton.

18 Dec 23:01

Hyper Specific Yoga with Adriene Videos I Wish She’d Make for Me

by Scarlet Meyer

Yoga for Young Adults Who Did Something Weird to Their Backs

Fifteen-Minute Yoga for the Modern Woman Who Spent the First Ten Minutes of Her Free Time Having a Panic Attack (Actually Only Five Minutes of Yoga)

The Exact Amount of Yoga You Need to Do to Tick That Box Where You Can Confidently Tell Your Doctor and Your Therapist That You’re “Doing Yoga”

Yoga for Reading Any Email That Begins with “People Are Trying to Reach You on LinkedIn”

Breathing Exercises for Checking LinkedIn and Seeing That No Less Than Seven Recruiters Think You’d Be a Great Fit for Business School at Full Sail University

Cooldown Techniques for the Five Minutes You Think Maybe They’re onto Something, Look into Applying to Business School, and Realize You Can’t Actually Afford Tuition

Benji the Dog Fan Cam

Yoga Video Where Adriene Loudly Says, “Wow, Good Job on All Those Planks!” to Impress Passersby (No Actual Planks)

Seven Hours of Corpse Pose, Which Is Definitely Not An Excuse to Take a Nap

Standing Warrior Pose Flow for the Empowered Woman Who Just Learned She Was Supposed to Be Cleaning Her Yoga Mat This Whole Time

Yoga for Using a DIY Mat Spray You Looked Up Online That Doesn’t Clean Your Mat but Does Slick It in Tea Tree Oil, So Every Time You Do Downward Dog, You Sort of Just Slide to the Floor and Regret Your Life’s Choices

Yoga for Shamefully Giving Up on the Whole Cleaning Your Mat Thing and Just Buying A New Mat (Use Code BENJI for 20 Percent Off at Checkout)

Yoga for Getting onto a Packed Subway Car During Teen Rush Hour

Calming Breathing Exercises for the Moment When Teens Walk by, and You Can’t Remember If the Jeans You’re Wearing Are Good

Mindful Meditation for Remembering That When You Were a Teen, All Adults Were Basically Invisible to You, So You Have Nothing to Worry About but in a Very Sad, Non-Reassuring Way

Yoga for Grappling with Your Impending Irrelevance, but Make It Something Inspiring About Being Humble and Present Because Otherwise, You Can’t Live with These Uncomfortable Feelings

Yoga Where We Turn the Camera Around Just Once—Not Creepy; We Just Want to See What the Rest of Adriene’s House Looks Like, Because She Has Nice Indoor Plants

Yoga Where Adriene Reminds Us That Someday, Many Years in the Future, She Might Not Want to Make Yoga Videos Anymore, but Not for a Very, Very Long Time, So There Is No Point Worrying About It Yet

Yoga with Adriene, Where You’re Adriene, Because You’ve Body Swapped in a Freaky Friday Situation to Learn an Important Lesson About Life and Love

Yoga Where Adriene Moves to Your Town and Decides to Be Your Friend In a Very Natural and Organic Way

Maybe You Meet at a Coffee Shop or Something and End Up Ordering the Same Thing (Dirty Chai with Two Shots of Espresso)?

Sure, That Doesn’t Sound Realistic, but Sometimes You Just Hit It Off with People and Have to Go with It

People Can Bond over All Sorts of Things—It’s Best Not to Overthink It

Maybe You Start a Small Business Together? Something to Do with Gardening?

Or You Go in Together on Tickets for a Taylor Swift Concert? You Could Split a Hotel Room and Share a Continental Breakfast in the Morning

Yoga with Adriene, Where You’re in the Video Together Even Though You’re Not Actually a Qualified Yoga Instructor, It’s Just a Hobby You Sort of Lean on When You Spiral

Yoga with Adriene, Where She Lets You Sit on Her Mat and Pet Benji (His Fur Looks Very Soft)

18 Dec 14:15

CEO Motivates Self By Keeping Own Photo On Desk

by The Onion Staff

NEW YORK—Saying it reminded him why he comes to work every morning, Solarion Enterprises CEO Dan Lipcot told reporters Friday that in order to stay motivated at the office, he always kept a photo of himself on his desk. “When I’m working long hours at night or on the weekend, this photo helps me to take a step back and remember who I’m doing it for,” said Lipcot, tearing up as he pointed at the image and stated that “this guy, this guy right here” was the reason for everything he did. “This job can be a real grind sometimes, but when I look at this picture and see that face smiling back at me, I realize it’s all worth it to make that fella happy,” he added. “After all, in the long run, the one thing that really matters is my ability to make lots and lots of money.” Lipcot added that the photo also reminded him to get home from work at a decent hour so that he could make sure he was spending plenty of quality time with himself.

The post CEO Motivates Self By Keeping Own Photo On Desk appeared first on The Onion.

18 Dec 14:15

Military Recruiter Enlists Ragtag Bunch Of Teen Misfits To Die In Overseas Conflict

by The Onion Staff

WASHINGTON—Expressing confidence that even the most hopeless group of outcasts could eventually be whipped into shape, Army recruiter Sgt. Paul Ackers confirmed Thursday that he was certain the ragtag bunch of teen misfits he had recently enlisted could be molded into a fighting force capable of dying in a conflict overseas.

Ackers told reporters the misfits, now members of the 194th Infantry Division, had been drawn from the ranks of high school underachievers across the country, all of them completely written off by their teachers and facing suspensions for such infractions as drinking in the parking lot, huffing aerosol from a rag, or setting off M-80s in the boys locker room. But with the proper motivation, Ackers said, his crew of outsiders would soon be fully prepared to wander haplessly onto the battlefield and be rapidly mowed down by highly trained enemy combatants. 

“They’re a bit rough around the edges, and dumber than bricks, but I know what they’re capable of,” said Ackers, stating that every one of the “losers” and “burnouts” had what it took to be shot through the eye by a sniper after giving away their position by absentmindedly boasting about the time they had felt up “an abso-
lutely stacked chick.” “You may see little punks with zero discipline, but I see warriors who’ll rise up when their backs are against the wall and be obliterated in an airstrike like they’ve been doing it their whole lives. I see brave soldiers who’ll be heading home mangled in body bags—that is, if you kick ’em in the pants a little.”

“When the time comes, and it seems like they don’t have a hope in hell, they’re gonna crash their armored ground vehicle into the side of a building and die screaming in the flaming wreckage,” Ackers added. “Guaranteed.”

After watching the recruits train and bond as a unit, Ackers’ superiors reportedly warmed up quickly to the idea that these misfits, some of whom had been manufacturing crude bongs in shop class just weeks earlier, could be disemboweled by a large wedge of shrapnel almost immediately, if they weren’t captured and tortured first. Given the surprising cohesion of the young enlistees, who are affectionately known as “The Wolf Pack,” some officers even suggested they could all be in a cemetery by Christmas.

“You never know how much new recruits like this are going to jerk you around, but there’s no doubt in my mind now that these kids are ready to be blown to pieces after fumbling their own grenades in a state of almost
animal panic,” Capt. Rhea Wallace said. “They might’ve been slackers once, but these youngsters are going to prove they can breathe their last agonizing breath while waiting in vain for a medic who has already triaged them and determined they are a lost cause.”

Continued Wallace: “What would these kids have done if they were just sitting at home? Left to their own devices, they’d end up unemployed, abusing marijuana, and totally adrift in life. Now they have a purpose greater than themselves. Now they’re prepared to be shipped out to a war zone on foreign soil and to be taken apart so completely by a gunship that only half their body will be returned to their grieving parents.”

The military is said to be especially excited about the battlefield potential of recruit Marc Roth, an 18-year-old “total fucking psycho” from Hawesville, KY who reportedly went punch-for-punch with a member of the football team, often demonstrated butterfly-knife tricks for classmates, and once withstood an intense 10-minute interrogation from the principal without divulging the identity of a buddy who pulled a fire alarm. For his part, Roth told reporters he never imagined someone like himself wearing an Army uniform and preparing to bleed out on the other side of the world.

“Sgt. Ackers put us through hell,” Roth said. “We must’ve spent five hours a day doing pushups and the rest crawling through the mud with our rifles. I hated it at first, but now I realize he did all this to prepare us for an enemy tank to roll over our legs.”

“No one else ever thought a loser like me would amount to anything,” Roth added. “But I know I’m gonna stroll right into the most laughably obvious ambush and watch my friends get riddled with bullets before the lights go out for me. And I’ll have Sgt. Ackers to thank.”

At press time, Roth and every other member of his misfit squad had received Purple Hearts for combat deaths suffered before they themselves could even fire a shot, an outcome their recruiter proudly told reporters he never doubted for a minute.

The post Military Recruiter Enlists Ragtag Bunch Of Teen Misfits To Die In Overseas Conflict appeared first on The Onion.

18 Dec 14:14

Mysterious Drones Spotted Over New Jersey

by The Onion Staff

Mysterious drones have been hovering in the skies above New Jersey and other states in the Northeast for weeks, alarming residents and prompting lawmakers to demand answers. What do you think?

“New Jersey has a sky?”

Matt Grimm, Text Wrapper

“Yeah, you see a lot more of them during mating season.”

Justin Deaver, Sweepstakes Manager

“It’s about time the government looked into why people waste their time flying drones.”

Caroline McBrayer, Appetizer Engineer

The post Mysterious Drones Spotted Over New Jersey appeared first on The Onion.

18 Dec 14:05

Pluralistic: Happy Public Domain Day 2025 to all who celebrate (17 Dec 2024)

by Cory Doctorow


Today's links



A collage displaying the works that are entering the public domain in 2025.

Happy Public Domain Day 2025 to all who celebrate (permalink)

In 1976, Congress set fire to the country's libraries; in 1998, they did it again. Today, in 2024, the flames have died down, and out of the ashes a new public domain is growing. Happy Public Domain Day 2025 to all who celebrate!

For most of US history, copyright was something you had to ask for. To copyright a work, you'd send a copy to the Library of Congress and they'd issue you a copyright. Not only did that let you display a copyright mark on your work – so people would know they weren't allowed to copy it without your permission – but if anyone wanted to figure out who to ask in order to get permission to copy or adapt a work, they could just go look up the paperwork at the LoC.

In 1976, Congress amended the Copyright Act to eliminate the "formality" of copyright registration. Now, all creative works of human authorship were copyrighted "at the moment of fixation" – the instant you drew, typed, wrote, filmed, or recorded them. From a toddler's nursery-school finger-painting to a graffiti mural on a subway car, every creative act suddenly became an article of property.

But whose property? That was on you to figure out, before you could copy, publish, perform, or preserve the work, because without registration, permissions had to start with a scavenger hunt for the person who could grant it. Congress simultaneously enacted a massive expansion of property rights, while abolishing the title registry that spelled out who owned what. As though this wasn't enough, Congress reached back in time and plopped an extra 20 years' onto the copyrights of existing works, even ones whose authors were unknown and unlocatable.

For the next 20 years, creative workers, archivists, educators and fans struggled in the face of this regime of unknowable property rights. After decades of well-documented problems, Congress acted again: they made it worse.

In 1998, Congress passed the Sonny Bono Copyright Act, AKA the Mickey Mouse Preservation Act, AKA the Copyright Term Extension Act. The 1998 Act tacked another 20 years onto copyright terms, but not just for works that were still in copyright. At the insistence of Disney, Congress actually yanked works out of the public domain – works that had been anthologized, adapted and re-issued – and put them back into copyright for two more decades. Copyright stretched to the century-plus "life plus 70 years" term. Nothing entered the public domain for the next 20 years.

So many of my comrades in the fight for the public domain were certain that this would happen again in 2018. In 2010, e-book inventor and Project Gutenberg founder Michael S Hart and I got into a friendly email argument because he was positive that in 2018, Congress would set fire to the public domain again. When I insisted that there was no way this could happen given the public bitterness over the 1998 Act, he told me I was being naive, but said he hoped that I was right.

Michael didn't live to see it, but in 2019, the public domain opened again. It was an incredible day:

https://archive.org/details/ClosingKeynoteForGrandReopeningOfThePublicDomainCoryDoctorowAtInternetArchive

No one has done a better job of chronicling the fortunes of our fragile, beautiful, bounteous public domain than Jennifer Jenkins and James Boyle of Duke University's Center for the Study of the Public Domain. Every year from 2010-2019, Boyle and Jenkins chronicled the works that weren't entering the public domain because of the 1998 Act, making sure we knew what had been stolen from our cultural commons. In so many cases, these works disappeared before their copyrights expired, for example, the majority of silent films are lost forever.

Then, in 2019, Jenkins and Boyle got to start cataloging the works that were entering the public domain, most of them from 1923 (copyright is complicated, so not everything that entered the public domain in 2019 was from that year):

https://web.law.duke.edu/cspd/publicdomainday/2019/

Every year since, they've celebrated a new bumper crop. Last year, we got Mickey Mouse!

https://pluralistic.net/2023/12/15/mouse-liberation-front/#free-mickey

In addition to numerous other works – by Woolf, Hemingway, Doyle, Christie, Proust, Hesse, Milne, DuBois, Frost, Chaplin, Escher, and more:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/12/20/em-oh-you-ess-ee/#sexytimes

Now, 2024 was a fantastic year for the public domain, but – as you'll see in the 2025 edition of the Public Domain Day post – 2025 is even better:

https://web.law.duke.edu/cspd/publicdomainday/2025/

So what's entering the public domain this year? Well, for one thing, there's more of the stuff from last year, which makes sense: if Hemingway's first books entered the PD last year, then this year, we'll get the books he wrote next (and this will continue every year until we catch up with Hemingway's tragic death).

There are some big hits from our returning champions, like Woolf's To the Lighthouse and A Farewell to Arms from Hemingway. Jenkins and Boyle call particular attention to one book: Faulkner's The Sound and the Fury, its title taken from a public domain work by Shakespeare. As they write, Faulkner spoke eloquently about the nature of posterity and culture:

[Humanity] is immortal, not because he alone among creatures has an inexhaustible voice, but because he has a soul, a spirit capable of compassion and sacrifice and endurance…The poet’s voice need not merely be the record of man, it can be one of the props, the pillars to help him endure and prevail.

The main attraction on last year's Public Domain Day was the entry of Steamboat Willie – the first Mickey Mouse cartoon – into the public domain. This year, we're getting a dozen new Mickey cartoons, including the first Mickey talkie:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mickey_Mouse_(film_series)#1929

Those 12 shorts represent a kind of creative explosion for the Disney Studios. Those early Mickey cartoons were, each and every one, a hybrid of new copyrighted works and the public domain. The backbone of each Mickey short was a beloved, public domain song, with Mickey's motion synched to the beat (animators came to call this "mickey mousing"). In 1929, there was a huge crop of public domain music that anyone could use this way:

Blue Danube, Pop Goes the Weasel, Yankee Doodle, Here We Go Round the Mulberry Bush, Ach Du Lieber Augustin, Listen to the Mocking Bird, A-Hunting We Will Go, Dixie, The Girl I Left Behind Me, a tune known as the snake charmer song, Coming Thru the Rye, Mary Had a Little Lamb, Auld Lang Syne, Aloha ‘Oe, Turkey in the Straw, My Bonnie Lies Over the Ocean, Habanera and Toreador Song from Carmen, Lizst’s Hungarian Rhapsody No. 2, and Goodnight, Ladies.

These were recent compositions, songs that were written and popularized in the lifetimes of the parents and grandparents who took their kids to the movies to see Mickey shorts like "The Barn Dance," "The Opry House" and "The Jazz Fool." The ability to plunder this music at will was key to the success of Mickey Mouse and Disney. Think of all the Mickeys and Disneys we've lost by locking up the public domain for the past half-century!

This year, we're getting some outstanding new old music for our public domain. The complexities of copyright terms mean that compositions from 1929 are entering the public domain, but we're only getting recordings from 1924. 1924's outstanding recordings include:

George Gershwin performing Rhapsody in Blue, Jelly Roll Morton playing Shreveport Stomp, and an early recording from contralto and civil rights icon Marian Anderson, who is famous for her 1939 performance to an integrated audience of over 75,000 people at the Lincoln Memorial. Anderson’s 1924 recording is of the spiritual Nobody Knows the Trouble I’ve Seen.

While the compositions include Singin' in the Rain, Ain't Misbehavin', An American in Paris, Bolero, (What Did I Do to Be So) Black and Blue, Tiptoe Through the Tulips, Happy Days Are Here Again, What Is This Thing Called, Love?, Am I Blue? and many, many more.

On the art front, we're getting Salvador Dali's earliest surrealist masterpieces, like Illumined Pleasures, The Accommodations of Desire, and The Great Masturbator. Dali's contemporaries are not so lucky: after a century, the early history of the works of Magritte are so muddy that it's impossible to say whether they are in or out of copyright.

But there's plenty of art with clearer provenance that we can welcome into the public domain this year, most notably, Popeye and Tintin. As the first Popeye and Tintin comics go PD, so too do those characters.

The idea that a fictional character can have a copyright separate from the stories they appear in is relatively new, and it's weird and very stupid. Courts have found that the Batmobile is a copyrightable character (Batman won't enter the public domain until 2035).

Copyright for characters is such a muddy, gross, weird idea. The clearest example of how stupid this gets comes from Sherlock Holmes, whose canon spans many years. The Doyle estate – a rent-seeking copyright troll – claimed that Holmes wouldn't enter the public domain until every Holmes story was in the public domain (that's this year, incidentally!).

This didn't fly, so their next gambit was to claim copyright over those aspects of Holmes's character that were developed later in the stories. For example, they claimed that Holmes didn't show compassion until the later stories, and, on that basis, sued the creators of the Enola Holmes TV show for depicting a gender-swapped Sherlock who wasn't a total dick:

https://www.theguardian.com/books/2020/dec/22/lawsuit-copyright-warmer-sherlock-holmes-dismissed-enola-holmes

As the Enola lawyers pointed out in their briefs, this was tantamount to a copyright over emotions: "Copyright law does not allow the ownership of generic concepts like warmth, kindness, empathy, or respect, even as expressed by a public domain character – which, of course, belongs to the public, not plaintiff."

When Mickey entered the public domain last year, Jenkins did an excellent deep dive into which aspects of Mickey's character and design emerged when:

https://web.law.duke.edu/cspd/mickey/

Jenkins uses this year's entry of Tintin and Popeye into the public domain to further explore the subject of proprietary characters.

Even though copyright extends to characters, it only covers the "copyrightable" parts of those characters. As the Enola lawyers wrote, the generic character traits (their age, emotional vibe, etc) are not protected. Neither is anything "trivial" or "minuscule" – for example, if a cartoonist makes a minor alteration to the way a character's pupils or eyes are drawn, that's a minor detail, not a copyrightable element.

The biggest impediment to using public domain characters isn't copyright, it's trademark. Trademark is very different from copyright: foundationally, trademark is the right to protect your customers from being deceived by your competitors. Coke can use trademark to stop Pepsi from selling its sugary drinks in Coke cans – not because it owns the word "Coke" or the Coke logo, but because it has been deputized to protect Coke drinkers from being tricked into buying not-Coke, thinking that they're getting the true Black Waters of American Imperialism.

Companies claim trademarks over cartoon characters all the time, and license those trademarks on food, clothing, toys, and more (remember Popeye candy cigarettes?).

Indeed, Hearst Holdings claims a trademark over Popeye in many traditional categories, like cartoons, amusement parks, ads and clothes. They're also in the midst of applying for a Popeye NFT trademark (lol).

Does that mean you can't use Popeye in any of those ways? Nope! All you need to do is prominently mention that your use of Popeye is unofficial, not associated with Hearst, and dispel any chance of confusion. A unanimous Supreme Court decision (in Dastar) affirm your right to do so. You can also use Popeye in the title of your unauthorized Popeye comic, thanks to a case called Rogers v Grimaldi.

This all applies to Tintin, too – a big deal, given that Tintin is managed by a notorious copyright bully who delights in cruelly terrorizing fan artists. Tintin is joined in the public domain by Buck Rogers, another old-timey character whose owners are scumbag rent-seekers.

Congress buried the public domain alive in 1976, and dumped a load of gravel over its grave in 1998, but miraculously, we've managed to exhume the PD, and it has been revived and is showing signs of rude health.

2024 saw the blockbuster film adaptation of Wicked, based on the public domain Oz books. It also saw the publication of James, a celebrated retelling of Twain's Huck Finn from the perspective of Huck's enslaved sidekick.

This is completely normal. It's how art was made since time immemorial. The 40 year experiment in life without a public domain is at an end, and not a minute too soon.

You can piece together a complete-as-possible list of 2025's public domain (including the Marx Brothers' Cocoanuts, Disney's Skeleton Dance, and Del Ruth's Gold Diggers of Broadway) here:

https://onlinebooks.library.upenn.edu/cce/


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This day in history (permalink)

#20yrsago US will shut down GPS to “fight terrorists” https://www.nbcnews.com/id/wbna6720387

#20yrsago Firefox ad in today’s NYT https://web.archive.org/web/20050204043841/https://www.mozilla.org/images/nyt_ad_large_2004.png

#20yrsago Barlow’s trial blogged https://web.archive.org/web/20041229065803/http://vitanuova.loyalty.org/weblog/nb.cgi/view/vitanuova/2004/12/16/1

#20yrsago Donate to EFF, send a lump of coal to MPAA and RIAA https://web.archive.org/web/20041218015602/http://www.downhillbattle.org/coal/

#20yrsago 65MB of vintage random numbers from 1965 https://www.rand.org/pubs/monograph_reports/MR1418.html

#15yrsago Spite Houses, built to piss off the neighbors https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spite_house#

#15yrsago Bug powder causes male bedbugs to stab each other to death with their penises https://www.medindia.net/news/bedbugs-may-be-on-way-out-with-new-discovery-62273-1.htm

#15yrsago Installing Windows considered as a literary genre https://nielsenhayden.com/makinglight/archives/012008.html#012008

#15yrsago Montage of magic “photo enhancement” in cop shows and movies https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vxq9yj2pVWk

#15yrsago Leaked secret EU-Canada copyright agreement – EU screws Canada https://web.archive.org/web/20091220121340/https://www.michaelgeist.ca/content/view/4627/125/

#15yrsago Rapist ex-lawmaker claims copyright on his name, threatens legal action against anyone who uses it without permission https://rapidcityjournal.com/news/rapist-former-lawmaker-ted-klaudt-claims-name-copyright/article_03881cae-e9a3-11de-848e-001cc4c002e0.html

#15yrsago RIP, Roy E Disney https://web.archive.org/web/20091220040552/http://abclocal.go.com/wabc/story?section=news&id=7174485

#15yrsago Photos of rotting, abandoned water park at Walt Disney World https://web.archive.org/web/20091213143405/http://disboards.com/showthread.php?t=2344523

#15yrsago Great Firewall of Australia will nationally block sites appearing on a secret, unaccountable list https://web.archive.org/web/20091220042804/http://www.efa.org.au/2009/12/17/filtering-coming-to-australian-in-2010/

#10yrsago Barbaric, backwards ancestor worship https://memex.craphound.com/2014/12/16/barbaric-backwards-ancestor-worship/

#10yrsago UK cops demand list of attendees at university fracking debate https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2014/dec/15/police-university-list-fracking-debate

#10yrsago Over 700 million people have taken steps to improve privacy since Snowden https://www.schneier.com/blog/archives/2014/12/over_700_millio.html

#10yrsago Judge convicted of planting meth on woman who reported him for harassment https://web.archive.org/web/20141212022710/http://www.ajc.com/news/news/local/ex-judge-convicted-of-planting-drugs-on-woman/njQwd/

#10yrsago No charges for Japanese man who dumped a quarter-ton of porn in a park https://web.archive.org/web/20141225092617/https://www.afp.com/en/node/2965441/

#10yrsago The strange history of Disney’s cyber-psychedelic “Computers Are People Too” https://www.vice.com/en/article/how-disney-was-hustled-into-making-the-trippiest-movie-about-computers-ever/

#10yrsago HOWTO cut paper snowflakes in the likeness of Nobel physics prizewinners https://www.symmetrymagazine.org/article/december-2014/deck-the-halls-with-nobel-physicists

#5yrsago Insulin prices doubled between 2012 and 2016 https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/health/2019/12/09/insulin-prices-double-ohio-lawmakers-looking-answers/2629115001/

#5yrsago Sloppy security mistakes in smart conferencing gear allows hackers to spy on board rooms, steal presentations https://www.wired.com/story/dten-video-conferencing-vulnerabilities/

#5yrsago Bernie Sanders is the only leading Democrat who hasn’t taken money from billionaires https://www.cbsnews.com/news/bernie-sanders-knocks-rivals-for-taking-donations-from-billionaires/

#5yrsago Privacy activists spent a day on Capitol Hill scanning faces to prove that scanning faces should be banned https://fightfortheftr.medium.com/we-scanned-thousands-of-faces-in-dc-today-to-show-why-facial-recognition-surveillance-should-be-3360958a76f1

#5yrsago Foxconn wants Wisconsin to keep paying it billions, but it won’t disclose what kind of factory it will build https://www.theverge.com/2019/12/13/21020885/foxconn-wisconsin-deal-renegotiate-tax-subsidy-lcd-factory-plant

#5yrsago Citing the Panama Papers, Elizabeth Warren proposes sweeping anti-financial secrecy rules https://medium.com/@teamwarren/my-plan-to-fight-global-financial-corruption-b66492583129

#5yrsago McKinsey is lying about its role in building ICE’s gulags, and paying to own the top search result for “McKinsey ICE” https://www.propublica.org/article/mckinsey-called-our-story-about-its-ice-contract-false-its-not

#5yrsago Boston city council election decided by a single vote https://www.wgbh.org/news/local/2019-12-13/five-takeaways-from-what-might-have-been-the-closest-election-in-boston-history

#5yrsago Bunnie Huang’s classic “Essential Guide to Electronics in Shenzhen” is now free online https://bunniefoo.com/bunnie/essential/essential-guide-shenzhen-web.pdf

#5yrsago Private equity firms should be abolished https://www.thebignewsletter.com/p/why-private-equity-should-not-exist

#5yrsago ICANN hits pause on the sale of .ORG to Republican billionaires’ private equity fund https://www.icann.org/en/blogs/details/org-update-9-12-2019-en

#5yrsago San Diego’s Mysterious Galaxy bookstore is saved! https://www.mystgalaxy.com/new-location-mysterious-galaxy-2020


Upcoming appearances (permalink)

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Latest books (permalink)



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Upcoming books (permalink)

  • Picks and Shovels: a sequel to "Red Team Blues," about the heroic era of the PC, Tor Books, February 2025
  • Enshittification: Why Everything Suddenly Got Worse and What to Do About It, Farrar, Straus, Giroux, October 2025

  • Unauthorized Bread: a middle-grades graphic novel adapted from my novella about refugees, toasters and DRM, FirstSecond, 2025



Colophon (permalink)

Today's top sources:

Currently writing:

  • Enshittification: a nonfiction book about platform decay for Farrar, Straus, Giroux. Status: second pass edit underway (readaloud)
  • A Little Brother short story about DIY insulin PLANNING

  • Picks and Shovels, a Martin Hench noir thriller about the heroic era of the PC. FORTHCOMING TOR BOOKS FEB 2025

Latest podcast: Daddy-Daughter Podcast 2024 https://craphound.com/overclocked/2024/12/17/daddy-daughter-podcast-2024/


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"When life gives you SARS, you make sarsaparilla" -Joey "Accordion Guy" DeVilla

18 Dec 12:17

Houston Public Media and KTSU Programming Partnership

by Kori Lee
KTSU and Houston Public Media jointly announce a new content collaboration that will expand the reach of the local Urban Alternative station, The Vibe.
18 Dec 11:38

Glasstire’s Best of 2024

by Glasstire

Glasstire’s staff and contributors share which Texas-based shows, events, and works made their personal “best” lists for 2024.

****

Emma Ahmad

A table top covered with button down shirts has pears with doilies sitting atop it.

Installation view of “Sheryl Anaya: Absurd Appetites (Tables for Two).” Photo: Kevin Todora, courtesy of Cluley Projects

Sheryl Anaya: Absurd Appetites (Tables for Two) at Cluley Projects, Dallas.

Looking back at all of the art I saw in 2024, one of my favorite shows was the first opening I attended this year on January 6. Sheryl Anaya’s solo exhibition, Absurd Appetites (Tables for Two), at Cluley Projects was both playful and charming with its daintily clad pears and cutesy butter designs on handmade dishes, yet it packed a punch in confronting themes of domestic labor, gender relations, and queer companionship. I loved every small detail of this intimate exhibition and can’t wait to see what Anaya does next!

A gallery displays large paintings of flower vases and sculptures.

Installation view of the “Dallas Contemporary Staff Exhibition.” Photo: Alexandra Hulsey

Dallas Contemporary Staff Exhibition at the Dallas Contemporary.

As a fellow museum worker, I just love seeing the artistic talents of the staff making the magic happen behind the scenes at an art institution. The Dallas Contemporary’s inaugural staff exhibition featured a diverse array of mediums and disciplines, celebrating the individuals whose creativity and drive exemplify the spirit of the Dallas Contemporary. The Visitor Services team was always on site and happy to discuss their work with visitors — my favorite part! I look forward to seeing what exhibitions and programming their staff hosts in 2025.

****

Caleb Bell

Two piles of ceramic leaves sit in the gallery.

Installation view of “Rebecca Manson: Barbecue.” Photo: Caleb Bell

Rebecca Manson: Barbecue at the Modern Art Museum of Fort Worth.

Perfect for a summer show in Texas, Rebecca Manson’s Barbecue installation was a feast for the eyes. Depicting a backyard barbecue gone wrong, the site-specific installation filling The Modern’s elliptical gallery consisted of over 45,000 individual ceramic elements. The immersive scene featured an overturned grill set among piles of leaves that contained a wide variety of scattered objects including cuts of meat, playing cards, and matches.

A large steel sculpture of bird silhouettes in foliage installed outside.

Melissa Miller’s “Wild Grapes and Herons” installed at the University of Houston-Victoria. Photo: Bill Kennedy

Melissa Miller’s Wild Grapes and Herons at the University of Houston-Victoria.

Commissioned by the University of Houston’s public art system, Melissa Miller’s bronze sculpture Wild Grapes and Herons was unveiled this summer in Kay’s Grove on UHV’s campus. Dramatically depicting silhouettes of herons surrounded by a cast of other native flora and fauna, the sculpture marks a new direction in outdoor work for the artist. 

****

Matthew Bourbon

Artist unknown, egbe, plantain leaves, braided raffia, corn fibers, and natural dyes

Artist unknown, egbe, plantain leaves, braided raffia, corn fibers, and natural dyes

Artist unknown, egbe, plantain leaves, braided raffia, corn fibers, and natural dyes

Backs in Fashion: Mangbetu Women’s Egbe at the Dallas Museum of Art (through August 3, 2025).

Sometimes humble objects speak the loudest. This long-running show of Mangbetu egbe or “back aprons” is a perfect example of how utilitarian items can surpass their primary use and in ways unexpected speak across time and culture. The small gallery of egbe at the Dallas Museum of Art stopped me in my tracks as I noted their tangible force of character; each vestment is uniquely crafted and feels alive with energy and material elegance. 

First created as a tool for comfort and modesty, the aprons are meant to cover the wearer’s backside. The colonial history of the Democratic Republic of the Congo clarifies some of the reasons for these artworks: the garments were worn on mostly ceremonial occasions or when foreign tourists visited. Yet, what is fascinating — at least to me — is how powerful they are as objects. They read like small sculptures, devastatingly direct paintings, and of course satisfyingly crafted apparel. The graphic mark-making and scattering of thread remnants accentuate each section of the rounded forms, beautifully highlighting the plantain leaves, braided raffia, corn fibers, and natural dyes used to make the egbe.

This memorable exhibition proves that human artistry can transcend the limits of our lifetimes, locale, and sometimes even functional intent.

****

Michele Brangwen

A black and white image of a womans hand holding two oversized dice.

A still from Man Ray’s “Les Mystères du Château du Dé”

The film Les Mystères du Château du Dé by Man Ray at the Museum of Fine Arts, Houston.

The Museum of Fine Arts, Houston presented four films by Man Ray, including his Les Mystères du Château du Dé from 1929. The films were accompanied by a soundtrack created by Sqürl, the duo of Jim Jarmusch and Carter Logan performing on guitars and synthesizers during a tour of the films through France in 2023, 100 years after the premiere of Le Retour à la raison, the first film on the program. Man Ray wrote in his autobiography Self-Portrait that he played his jazz phonograph records when showing the films, so the intention was not to have them seen in silence. The Sqürl soundtrack is beautifully responsive to the films in a subtle and pleasing way. The poetic imagery of all four films ranges from the delicate to the sensual to the absurd to the wildly abstract. One gets the impression that to Man Ray the process of filmmaking was like a playground where even the physical substance of the film itself was part of the fun and experimentation. In Les Mystères du Château du Dé, his last and my favorite film, as the guests explore the mysterious castle of chance, arrived upon by a toss of the dice, Man Ray asks “Do our actions linger like ghosts?”

A quintet of musicians playing piano, guitar, saxophone, cello, and drums perform before a 30 foot Cy Twombly artwork.

Fire and Water Quintet performing at the Cy Twombly Galleries. Photo: Tony Martinez

Myra Melford’s Fire and Water Quintet at the Menil Collection’s Cy Twombly Galleries, Houston. Read our review here.

Nameless Sound and the Menil Collection presented pianist and composer Myra Melford’s Fire and Water Quintet performing music inspired by the work of Cy Twombly. The evening was magical as the music flowed from these powerfully creative musicians: Myra Melford, piano; Ingrid Laubrock, saxophone; Mary Halvorson, guitar; Tomeka Reid, cello; and Lesley Mok, drums. In the welcome company of Twombly’s 30-foot masterpiece Untitled (Say Goodbye, Catullus, to the Shores of Asia Minor), the performance became an immersive multidisciplinary conversation between visual art and music. 

****

Brenda Melgoza Ciardiello

Hundreds of various sized pieces of paper hang fro mthe ceiling of a gallery on strings. Each piece has a different video of animals projected onto its surface.

Sarah Sze, “Slow Dance,” installation detail, 2024, paper, string, aluminum, mixed media, video projection, and sound, dimensions variable, courtesy of the artist, © Sarah Sze, photo: Brenda Melgoza Ciardiello

Sarah Sze at the Nasher Sculpture Center, Dallas. Read our review here.

I was surprised that I was so drawn in by the constellations of flickering images in Sarah Sze’s installations at the Nasher Sculpture Center this past winter. How did she manage to make flashing, miniature photographs eye-catching in the for-Instagram, over-saturation of our photo-crazy world? Yet, I visited the exhibition at the Nasher Sculpture Center, consisting of three new, site-specific mixed-media installations, three times over the course of the first two months it was on view. I simply couldn’t get enough of the startling way in which Sze managed to take two-dimensional ideas, and make them objects with intense, relatable physicality: memories made real somehow. She gave me a sense that I was experiencing, living — not just looking. The work was intensely, visually mesmerizing despite its delicate impermanence. The installations were primarily composed of light, shadow, and projected color — and were held together by a startlingly delicate web of tenuous strings and weights made of discarded art supplies and random objects from the artist’s environment. One wrong move — a curious five-year-old — and the entire thing would have come down. Like all the kids I saw, I was drawn in again and again: poetic oscillation of scale creating scenes that existed somewhere deliciously between sublime overwhelm and intimate conversation. 

Despite its undeniable beauty, I was struck by the cleverness of Sze’s critical probing at the realities (or surrealities) of our now largely image-based existence. The virtual, constantly evolving world in which we live — largely through tiny personal communication devices — results in a fractured but nevertheless collective memory. I still can’t decide if this virtual culture — like the largest of the three installations, Slow Dance, blinking on and off again continuously with new images that become new truths which become new memories — actually brings us closer together through perceived collective experience/remembering or pushes us further apart into loneliness. What does a constant rotation of flimsy, 24-hour-only-instagram-story half-lives which are forgotten almost as soon as they are seen mean for meaningful recollection? Is it actually living when it happens online? 

I haven’t forgotten her delicate, web-like installations, but I wonder if their impermanence isn’t yet another jab at the absurd, dizzying merry-go-round of the attention economy in which we are all a little bit trapped. I’d happily get lost again in her cinematic blank sheets of watercolor paper and strings, all my sunsetting hopes and dreams tethered to reality only by a suddenly substantial spare paperclip or two. 

****

Colette Copeland

A kitchen with 70s era design houses an improv laboratory with mocroscopes and obsolete science equipment on its countertops.

Jonah Freeman + Justin Lowe, “Sunset Corridor,” installation view, 2024, mixed media, dimensions variable. Courtesy of San San International © Jonah Freeman + Justin Lowe. Photo: Evie Marie Bishop

Jonah Freeman + Justin Lowe: Sunset Corridor at the Modern Art Museum of Fort Worth. Read our review here.

I spent much of the year in India on a Fulbright Award, so missed many important exhibitions throughout the state. I trust my colleagues will highlight them. Both of my “best of 2024” choices are currently on exhibit. 

Collaborative artist duo Jonah Freeman and Justin Lowe transformed the Modern’s upstairs permanent collection galleries into an immersive multilayered installation. The overarching narrative is the premise that San Francisco and San Diego merge into one city. Imagine sci-fi futurism with references to the tech sector, drug and music counterculture, new-age spirituality, alchemy, and more. I imagined myself as a visual archeologist from the future experiencing a vast wunderkammer, attempting to decode the layered narratives of each object. An experience where the unreality of the invented world seeps into our current “real” world. 

A gallery displays large color prints of photographs of young, shirtless, tattooed men.

Installation view of “Chivas Clem: Shirttail Kin.” Photo: Kevin Todora for Dallas Contemporary

Chivas Clem: Shirttail Kin at the Dallas Contemporary (through January 12, 2025).

Chivas Clem’s photographs of young transient men in Paris, Texas evoke the words desire, trust, vulnerability, intimacy, and comfort in one’s body. The images are sexy and gritty. They also speak to larger themes of dismantling the cowboy trope, the result of the prison-industrial complex, epidemic opioid addiction, and the disintegration of the farming industry leading to poverty and joblessness. In our post-election haze, Clem’s work takes on a greater importance. Returning to a homeland that was openly hostile to him as a child and creating portraits that make visible what has been invisible is an act of courage and defiance. In a state that is actively trying to revoke LGBTQ rights, it is important to have this work seen.

****

Ruben Cordova

A woman stands in a large gallery with figurative paintings hanging on the wall, looking directly into the camera.

Deborah Keller-Rihn at St. Mary’s University, with “Lauren, at 26: Protector of the Environment” (2008) on the right. Photo: Ruben C. Cordova

Deborah Keller-Rihn: The Evolution Of A Feminine Mythology at St. Mary’s University, San Antonio.

I am acknowledging two under-the-radar exhibitions. The first is Deborah Keller-Rihn’s The Evolution of a Feminine Mythology, a 30-year retrospective held at St. Mary’s University as part of Fotoseptiembre. Commencing with hand-colored darkroom prints of her daughters for her master’s thesis Symbolic Transformations: The Creation of a Personal Mythology, the show traces Keller-Rihn’s subsequent explorations of Tibetan Buddhism and Hinduism. It draws on photographs taken in India featured in several of her previous exhibitions, as well as local women situated in mythic contexts, including one who represents the multi-armed goddess Tara, which the artist regards as “one of the earliest feminists.” She also utilizes her daughter Lauren as the Protector of the Environment on the banks of the San Antonio River. Keller-Rihn’s Glimpses of Eternity series features women, both young and old, in mythic and historical poses. Keller-Rihn delves deeply into the mythic dimensions of feminine iconography and their sources, but always with concern for the individuality of her female models. 

A man stands before three intricate paintings hangin on the wall of a gallery.

Marco Antonio García with several of his paintings, from an undated photograph on Instagram

Phantasms and Fever Dreams at Bihl Haus Arts, San Antonio.

Phantasms and Fever Dreams featured the work of Michelle Love and Marco Antonio García. The latter artist, afflicted with cancer, died soon after the opening. The closing reception served as a celebration of García’s life, including a performance by the band Dharma Paax, for which he had played several instruments. 

A complex painting with several human figures running across the bottom third and objects attached to the surface.

Marco Antonio García, “Crossing Dimensions” (detail), undated mixed media painting on canvas. Photo: Ruben C. Cordova at Bihl Haus Arts

A self-taught artist, García produced complex, densely-layered, and densely-packed artworks. The largest of them appear abstract from a distance, but they always have humorous figural elements, ranging from miscellaneous animals to subtle, collage-like faces and tiny graffiti figures, to fully achieved human forms. He often includes alphabetical components, as well as found objects such as coins, beans, pieces of wood, and tiny plastic objects. Linear elements and tiny cell-like structures evoke circuits and transistors that crisscross the energized surfaces of his paintings like electrical currents. García brushed, dripped, poured, cut, scumbled, and collaged his forms, then crowned them with glitter, before burying them in resin. They shine like other-worldly artifacts preserved in amber. He was an original, a visionary, an artist with an intuitive gift for constructing and connecting multivalent forms. San Antonio has lost a highly talented and unique creative force, one who never received the acknowledgment his work deserved.

****

Madison Ford

A low-lit gallery with several neon signs on its wall.

Installation view of “Patrick Martinez: Histories” at Dallas Contemporary

Patrick Martinez: Histories at Dallas Contemporary.

At the risk of invoking 2022 Harry Styles and his infamous “my favorite thing about the movie is that it felt like a movie,” Patrick Martinez’s Histories at Dallas Contemporary was everything you want an art exhibition to be. The multimedia paintings and installation works exploring the histories and evolving landscapes of Los Angeles and its Latinx culture were visually stunning, their neon and rubble commanding the sprawling industrial galleries of the museum. Histories was thought-provoking and surprising and let beauty and message be in service of one another. Prehistoric-looking vegetation, activist mantras, and nods to mural tradition seemed to speak to a primal human call to leave a trace of ourselves throughout time. Martinez and curator Rafael Barrientos Martínez created a show that reaffirmed the root joy of an exhibition — to be stirred by the pure act of looking. 

****

Jessica Fuentes

An installation image of a video by Dario Robleto.

Dario Robleto, “Ancient Beacons Long for Notice,” 2023–24, UHD video (71:00)

Dario Robleto: The Signal at the Amon Carter Museum of American Art, Fort Worth. Read the review here.

One of the most powerful and poignant exhibitions I saw this year was Dario Robleto: The Signal at the Amon Carter Museum of American Art in Fort Worth. I was not very familiar with the artist’s work before, but I had a sense of what the main component of the show was about and I trusted that Curator Maggie Adler, who had brought other significant shows to the institution, was planning something monumental. 

The show centered on Ancient Beacons Long for Notice, a new film by Robleto that investigates the making of the Golden Record and reveals what Ann Druyan snuck on the record. Listening to the story unfold over the 71-minute film was captivating. The imagery, a combination of archival photographs and video clips, perfectly supplemented the winding narrative. In the end, I had learned more about an important cultural moment but more importantly, I felt a strong sense of connection to the world, to the universe, to things that often feel unimaginably obscure.

In addition to the film, the rest of the exhibition was filled with an array of meaningful works that Robleto had completed between 2012 and 2018. I was impressed with the lines that his work straddles, both in terms of art and science, but also the space of playful and contemplative. After seeing the show, I had a chance to talk with the artist and gain more insight into his work, which I shared via this review

A gallery with three framed works on its walls.

A view of “Unbreakable: Feminist Visions from the Gilberto Cardenas and Dolores Garcia Collection”

Unbreakable: Feminist Visions from the Gilberto Cardenas and Dolores Garcia Collection at the Blanton Museum of Art, Austin.

I kicked off 2024 with a trip to Austin to learn more about the Mexic-Arte Museum. While I was there, I also popped over to the Blanton Museum of Art to see the outdoor spaces that had been renovated in 2023. Walking through the museum I stumbled upon Unbreakable: Feminist Visions from the Gilberto Cárdenas and Dolores Garcia Collection. Since the Blanton acquired more than 5,000 works from the Cárdenas/Garcia Collection, Claudia Zapata, Associate Curator of Latino Art, has been organizing small exhibitions that present different aspects of the collection. 

The show featured works by Latina and Chicana artists exploring survival and resilience in the face of poverty, immigration, misogyny, and genocide. Many of the artists in the exhibition also had Texas ties, such as Liliana Wilson, Kathy Vargas, Suzy González, Margarita Cabrera, Sandra C. Fernández, and Delilah Montoya. The small but mighty exhibition left a lasting impression on me, as someone who worked in museums for a decade and saw firsthand the typical lack of representation in museum collections for Latina artists (and all women of color).

A photograph of artist Celia Álvarez Muñoz sitting in a gallery at Ruby City in San Antonio.

Celia Álvarez Muñoz at Ruby City, 2024

Celia Álvarez Muñoz: Los Brillantes at Ruby City, San Antonio (through January 19, 2025). Read our profile of the artist here.

Other than my hometown of Fort Worth, the city I spent the most time in this year was San Antonio. I was there multiple times as I researched culturally specific art organizations, but beyond that project I found myself drawn back to the city often to attend events and see exhibitions. As a photographer, I couldn’t pass up seeing Celia Álvarez Muñoz’s Los Brillantes at Ruby City, and I was honored to have an opportunity to interview her. 

The exhibition showcases 18 photographs from Muñoz’s 2002 series Semejantes Personajes/Significant Personages, which documented Latinx artists in the city at the time. Using a Holga, Muñoz created multiple exposure images of the artists in their studios or other familiar spaces. After seeing the show and chatting with Muñoz at Ruby City, I was able to visit her studio in Arlington. There I got to see other works from the series and learn more about the artist’s life, resulting in an expansive profile covering much more than the current exhibition. 

A gallery with red walls displays several surrealist paintings hung salon style.

An installation view of “Julie Speed: The Suburbs of Eden”

Julie Speed: The Suburbs of Eden at Ballroom Marfa (through February 2, 2025).

During this year’s Chinati Weekend, I made my way out to Marfa to participate in the festivities. While there is always much to see and do during this celebratory weekend in the small Texas town, Julie Speed: The Suburbs of Eden was a standout. Bringing together the artist’s work across decades and spanning the whole building of Ballroom Marfa, the exhibition transported me into the artist’s world. This was achieved in part through the inclusion of a participatory experience — Speed installed a work desk with materials, inviting visitors to write her a letter.

Speed’s work is beautiful and complex, reminiscent of both Surrealist and Renaissance works. Contorted figures and scenes of apocalyptic doom harken at once to humanity’s past and a disconcerting future. Somehow, the images are not horrifying, on the contrary, they are strangely serene, perhaps a reminder that we are all in this mess together.

Aside from the opportunity to see the exhibition, the weekend was made all the better when I accidentally intruded on Speed’s studio, thinking it was open to the public. Of course, she so generously welcomed me in and turned on the lights so I could peruse her space. We talked about photography, filming, and social media, and I was pleased to get a peek at her latest works in progress. 

****

Michelle Kraft

A gallery space with two pieces: the foreground a sculpture of a large bust in the background a wall piececomprising handprints on the wall and a ceramic bowl.

Installation view of “Belonging: Contemporary Native Ceramics from the Southern Plains” with Raven Halfmoon’s (Caddo/Choctaw/Otoe/Delaware) Cowgirl at Heart and Cortney Yellowhorse-Metzger’s (Osage) Tho-day-they (To Live in Friendship)

Belonging: Contemporary Native Ceramics from the Southern Plains at the Louise Hopkins Underwood Center for the Arts, in conjunction with Texas Tech University, Lubbock. Read our review here.

In February and March 2024, the Louise Hopkins Underwood Center for the Arts, in Lubbock, hosted Belonging: Contemporary Native Ceramics from the Southern Plains. The exhibition, which was organized in conjunction with the Texas Ceramics Symposium, was curated by Klinton Burgio-Ericson of Texas Tech University’s School of Visual Arts. Featuring sculpture, vessels, and installations in clay, the show included the work of seven Native American artists, representing a dozen indigenous nations and communities. The theme of “belonging” explored the relational aspects of connectedness, as these ideas are tied to place, culture, time, memory, and kinship. Part of TTU’s “Expanding the Circle: Indigenous and Native American Studies” curriculum, Belonging served as a conversation toward strengthening relationships with the Native American communities of the South Plains. Collectively and individually, the show’s works also served as a reminder that we live in reciprocity with one another.

****

Renee Lai

A photograph of a sculpture by Carl Cheng of plastic box on top of a bundle of wheat.

Carl Cheng / John Doe Co., “Early Warning System,” 1969–2023, fabricated plastic, electronics, projector mechanism, radio, wheat, wood. Courtesy the artist and Philip Martin Gallery. Photo: Jeff McLane

Carl Cheng: Nature Never Loses at The Contemporary Austin.

I just loved this show. I came to see some of the early photo work, got sucked in looking at an astounding collection of dried avocado husks, and really liked the public artwork that was shown with a projector. It’s hard to travel to look at public work in different locations, so to see multiple projects at once, with renderings, diagrams, and some in-process documentation, gave me a window into his thought process. Overall, the work was elegant, surprising, and energetic. 

****

Gabriel Martinez

I know I’m just a large primate with a hypertrophied frontal lobe, but I know what I like. In what has to be a record year for censorship, I managed to see a good number of excellent exhibitions. Here are a few:

Three Coca-Cola bottles with Letra-set letters adhered to the bottles.

Cildo Meireles, “Insertions into Ideological Circuits: Coca-Cola Project,” 1970

A Coca-Cola bottle with the phrase "YANKEES GO HOME! affixed in Letra-set letters.

Cildo Meireles, “Insertions into Ideological Circuits: Coca-Cola Project,” 1970

For What It’s Worth: Value Systems in Art since 1960 at The Warehouse, Dallas.

Easily the best group show I’ve seen in a decade, this large exhibition caught me off guard. I love a good curatorial premise; there are so few of them around anymore that it almost seems like an anachronistic concept in contemporary art. It’s rare to have a group exhibition get past the listicle stage of assembling a team of thinkers and makers. For What It’s Worth had an outstanding collection of artists who have created seminal pieces over the last sixty years. The artists in this exhibition address “the growing challenges to value systems that have arisen out of confrontations with social, political, and cultural power structures.” In other words, they do what I believe all art does: add value to the materials, ideas, and objects they encounter. 

Three small framed photographs depicting quotidian images.

Installation view of “Thomas Demand: The Stutter of History”

Thomas Demand: The Stutter of History at the Museum of Fine Arts, Houston.

I first saw Demand’s work about twenty years ago when I was working as an art handler in the nation’s capital. I might not have registered what was happening in the innocuous prints had the collector not explained the work to me. Like other photographers from that time, such as Taryn Simon and Hiroshi Sugimoto, Demand creates work that pushed back against the truth claims of photography in a wholly unique manner. Images culled from a range of media are reconstructed to scale in paper and cardboard and then photographed in Demand’s studio. The resulting effect pushes the medium in new directions and asks viewers to consider both their relationship to images and photography’s role in constructing and circulating history. This show collected some of Demand’s major pieces from the last twenty-five years and had a room of new works drawn from phone photos. It was a gift to see so many of his projects collected together. 

Two framed t-shirts hang on a gallery wall.

Works from “So Far So Good”

Phillip Pyle, II’s So Far So Good at the Houston Museum of African American Culture.

Laughing in a gallery is a rare engagement with art, especially when you’re laughing with the work. In the hands of Houston’s Phillip Pyle, II, comedy and satire are critical weapons. I wasn’t the only one who felt this as I wandered through So Far So Good — two other visitors had similar reactions to Pyle’s sense of artistic humor. 

This show had a lot to say, but the way Pyle communicated the message made it one of my favorites of the year. He considers how ideas circulate beyond framed fine art. T-shirts, posters, and postcards are some of the systems the artist employs to build meaning. This was the strongest part of the show and reminded me of Legacy Russell’s amazing book Black Meme, which focuses on the history and politics of the circulation of Black culture, tracing the movement of the meme from its origins in silent film to its current state of endless digital reproduction. Pyle’s art reflects a world of comedy and pain to the viewer — a world in need of change. It’s rare to see art that covers this much ground and still has a punchline. 

****

Melissa L. Mednicov

A chalk drawing of a glacier on a black background.

Tacita Dean, “The Wreck of Hope,” 2022, chalk on blackboard, 144 1/8 × 288 3/16 inches. Image
courtesy of the artist, Frith Street Gallery, London, and Marian Goodman Gallery,
New York/Paris/Los Angeles. © Tacita Dean. Photo: Fredrik Nilsen Studio.

Tacita Dean: Blind Folly at the Menil Collection, Houston (through April 19, 2025).

A 2024 art exhibition I continue to think about is Tacita Dean’s Blind Folly at the Menil Collection, curated by Michelle White. Dean’s works reward looking — beautiful, poetic, and often meditative. They are also rather tricky: belying complications and containing more, or new, meaning depending on your knowledge of her work. I am sure I missed some important ideas, but I think that might be Dean’s point. Her beautiful blackboards anchored the exhibition for me. In a time that feels impenetrably long yet abrupt and stupefying, the ephemerality of her works resonated and oddly felt reassuring. 

Some other standout exhibitions this year: Ruth Asawa Through the Line at the Menil Drawing Institute, Meiji Modern: Fifty Years of New Japan at the Museum of Fine Arts, Houston, and Edges of Ailey at the Whitney Museum of American Art.

****

Leslie Moody Castro

Installation view of printed images on vinyl and framed photos layered on top

Installation view. “A Trajectory of Grief” by Monica Martinez-Diaz on view at Women and their Work.

Monica Martinez-Diaz: A Trajectory of Grief at Women & Their Work, Austin. Read our review here.

Grief is a tricky bitch. It’s a deeply personal and unique experience that is also a weirdly collective sentiment we can all share. In her exhibition at Women & Their Work, Monica Martinez-Diaz tackled this layered trickiness with a body of work that layered glimpses into memory through the stillness of her images — as if everything stopped the moment she clicked the shutter. Over the last year, life took me down a path of grief that was big, ungraspable, and exceptional and the memories I hold are like this show: still and locked in what feels like a series of unconnected moments.

Undercurrents- Vincent Valdez 2024

Work from “Vincent Valdez: Undercurrents”

Undercurrents: Vincent Valdez at Artpace San Antonio. Read our review of the Houston iteration of the exhibition here.

This show was originally exhibited at Art League Houston. The curator, Zhaira Constiniano, put together a superb show. In this iteration, the conference room of Artpace was converted into a dense, salon-style hang of work by formative mentors, educators, and colleagues of Valdez throughout his career. This show wasn’t just about Vincent as much as it was about everyone who contributed to his practice and formation as an artist. The exhibition felt like a homecoming, and it was as beautiful as it was generous. That said, Artpace is now obligated to a salon-style hang from here on.

A photograph of an artwork by Bernardo Vallarino of an intricately drawn pattern on a black bust form.

A work from “Bernardo Vallarino: Size Matters – The Golden Rule”

Bernardo Vallarino: Size Matters-The Golden Rule and Carmen Menza: Patterns of Disturbance (through January 11, 2025) at Ro2 Art.

Both exhibitions are on view concurrently at Ro2 Art and this could not be a better programmatic choice on the part of gallery director Jordan Roth. Do not misunderstand, both exhibitions do not need to exist in tandem, they each have very distinct identities that are equally strong, powerful, and loud. Vallarino’s show is dark and decadent and tackles the fine line between power and kink, and one who judges and the other who is judged. Who gets to decide? Menza’s show is bright and light, taking on the fear and anger women feel about losing control of reproductive healthcare decisions. These shows individually are timely and strong, and together they are a force.

****

Lauren Moya Ford

A large sculpture of a woman on her side fills the front of a gallery.

Katarina Janečková Walshe, “Home,” 2024

Host: Katarina Janečková Walshe at The Contemporary Austin. Read our review here.

During a year of great global strife, Katarína Janečková Walshe’s first museum show was a passionate plea for peace. In this energetic and ambitious exhibition, the artist — who immigrated from Bratislava, Slovakia to rural south Texas ten years ago — presented the compassionate model of motherhood as a balm for the increasing violence and discord around us. Her charged, multimedia artworks were intimate collaborations between herself and the elements that enter her life and studio, including her young daughter’s painted handprints and stray leaves stuck to her thickly impastoed paint. Nature, power, sensuality, and care moved across Janečková Walshe’s large-scale canvases and sculpture. Altogether, the exhibition revealed an innovative artist with a profound message to share.

A non-figurative abstract painting with red and black drips.

Janet Sobel, Untitled, ca. 1946–48, enamel and sand on board, 17 5/16 × 14 inches. The Menil Collection, Houston, Gift of Leonard Sobel and Family. © Janet Sobel. Photo: James Craven

Janet Sobel: All-Over at the Menil Collection, Houston. Read our review here.

Named America’s best woman painter by Peggy Guggenheim and considered the likely inspiration behind Jackson Pollock’s drip paintings, Janet Sobel rocked the New York art world in the 1940s and then promptly disappeared (or so it seemed). This thoughtful exhibition at the Menil Collection gave visitors a rare glimpse at the artist’s groundbreaking paintings while contesting the problematic ways that Sobel and her work have historically been received. The artist’s mixed media abstractions broke the mold — Clement Greenberg called them “the first really all-over effect that I had seen” — but so did her back story. A Jewish immigrant and mother of five, Sobel began painting without formal instruction at age 44. Labels like “naive” and “primitive” were imposed on the artist in her day, but this exhibition gave Sobel’s important but misunderstood place in art history a second look.

****

William Sarradet

A three-channel video in which three flatscreen TV monitors are hung horizontally adjacent to each other, depicting a scene at the table with the artist sitting between her parents on either side of her.

Eileen Maxson, “Parent Trap,” three-channel video

The verso side of a video installation; wooden armature for a mobile wall reaches more than halfway to the ceiling, and is propped up by long wooden boards and sandbags.

Rear view of Eileen Maxson’s “Parent Trap,” on view at Keijsers Koning

Eileen Maxson: Parent Trap at Keijsers Koning, Dallas. Read our review here.

Eileen Maxson’s three-channel video installation, presented at Keijsers Koning in Dallas during late summer 2024, tackled the fraught terrain of contemporary American politics through the deeply personal lens of family. Featuring her parents as both subjects and commentators, the work offered an incisive critique of the performative and cyclical nature of political discourse in a polarized two-party system. 

The gallery became a sparse environment for this showing. A false wall bisecting the space served as both a physical and conceptual metaphor for the emotional and ideological divides that typify political engagement today. The minimalist setup focused the viewer’s attention entirely on the interplay between the three video screens, creating a sense of intimacy and isolation that mirrored the insular effect of modern political opinion-making. 

Through poignant exchanges, the videos revealed the tensions and contradictions inherent in Maxson’s intergenerational dialogue with her parents. These interactions served as a microcosm of the national landscape, examining how political ideologies are shaped by lived experiences, personal histories, and media narratives. 

As one of the most affecting exhibitions of the year in Texas, Maxson’s work at Keijsers Koning demonstrated the power of art to distill complex sociopolitical phenomena into intimate, resonant experiences. It left audiences grappling with questions about the porous boundaries between the personal and the political, making it an essential entry in the state’s 2024 cultural landscape.

A poster in the style of Laugh-In with a nude person with ling hair and white go go boots.

​​Martine Gutierrez, “Identity Boots Ad,” page 99 from “Indigenous Woman,” 2018, archival pigment print

Native America: In Translation at the Blanton Museum of Art, Austin. Read our review here.

Curated by Wendy Red Star, this exhibition presents a rich dialogue on Indigenous identity through the lens of photography and mixed media. Featuring an array of artists including Martine Gutierrez, Alan Michelson, Guadalupe Maravilla, Marianne Nicolson, Nalikutaar Jacqueline Cleveland, and others, the show dismantles stereotypes and repositions Indigenous narratives within contemporary contexts of self-representation and resilience. 

Highlights include Gutierrez’s fashion-inspired Indigenous Woman series, which reclaims beauty standards through an Indigenous gaze, and Michelson’s projection work, blending historical memory with cultural symbolism. Cleveland’s documentation of Yup’ik foraging traditions emphasizes sustainable practices tied to land stewardship, while Nicolson’s luminous glass installations evoke the fragility and endurance of cultural identity. 

Through these varied works, Native America: In Translation challenges the exoticism often imposed on Indigenous art, reframing it as a living, evolving practice that bridges the past and present. This exhibition underscores the complexity of cultural translation and offers profound insights into the layered realities of Indigenous life today.

A small carved marble sculpture depicting a centaur and a young boy.

A small sculpture from “The Legacy of Vesuvius: Bourbon Discoveries on the Bay of Naples”

The Legacy of Vesuvius: Bourbon Discoveries on the Bay of Naples at the Meadows Museum, Dallas.

This exhibition dives into the Bourbon monarchy’s transformative excavations of Herculaneum and Pompeii, revealing how these archaeological endeavors shaped the neoclassical aesthetic that swept through 18th-century Europe. Through frescoes, Capodimonte porcelain, court portraits, and other artifacts, the show highlights the fusion of political ambition, cultural revival, and the enduring fascination with sites of catastrophe. 

The Bourbon rulers used these excavations to elevate their prestige by drawing parallels between their reign and the grandeur of ancient Rome. The exhibition reflects on this strategic alignment of art and power while presenting rare and delicate works, some of which may never leave Naples again. Visitors are invited to ponder the dual symbolism of Vesuvius as both a destructive force and a muse for artistic and cultural renewal, bridging themes of nature’s volatility and human resilience. A compelling narrative of disaster and creativity, this exhibition offers an exceptional glimpse into the intertwined legacies of history, politics, and art.

****

Anthony Sutton

A large figurative sculpture installed outdoors witha missing head and a blue tarp nearby.

A view of Shazia Sikander’s “Havah… to breathe, air, life”
on the University of Houston after it was beheaded

Shazia Sikander’s Havah… to breathe, air, life at the University of Houston.

How many of us say we want our creative work to do something in the world? The view from the Roy Cullen Building at the University of Houston, where my office and classes are located, was an up-close look at the variety of conversations, actions, and array of feelings a piece of art can activate. From the confusion many of us in the English department had when the statue was first erected to the immediate and troubling demonstration from an anti-abortion group unrelated to the University of Houston system, which triggered conversations in both the Art Department and the Women, Gender, and Sexuality Studies program. Our somewhat secluded campus became part of one of the biggest national news stories in the art world when Havah… to breathe, air, life was beheaded in July. Sikander designed Havah… to breathe, air, life to represent “the history of public works, from which women and people of color have largely been absent” and the anti-abortion response revealed a massive disconnect in how different groups interpret art and the responsibility we have to interpret “representations of women” accurately and justly. The face of Havah… to breathe, air, life was modeled after numerous women poets from historical periods and the contemporary moment. In a testament to the intricacies of Havah… to breathe, air, life, more resonances emerge as that head fell mere feet away from the English department building.

A digital image depicting a bus, a police officer, skyscrapers, and detritus in the street.

A view of Jacolby Satterwhite’s “A Metta Prayer”

Jacolby Satterwhite’s A Metta Prayer at the Museum of Fine Arts, Houston.

In 2023, when Satterwhite’s piece We Are in Hell when We Hurt Each Other showed at the Blaffer Art Museum, he instantly became one of my favorite artists working today. This eclectic mix of video game aesthetics, vogueing, and music, that resonates with Satterwhite’s identities as an African American person and a gay man has such wildness and depth, that it could only come from a singular imagination. A Metta Prayer brought Satterwhite’s work back to Houston on a bigger scale. Its immersive four-panel display — the synthesis of Eastern spiritual traditions with Southern gospel — shows the path to a better future, in spite of historical and structural violence. In a time when we often feel the rift between the ecological and digital worlds, A Metta Prayer celebrates the moments when we can inhabit both.

****

Lauren Shults

A photograph of a cowboy on a horse in profile standing before a large saguaro cactus.
18 Dec 11:36

The Vibe now on 88.7 KUHF HD3

by mike@mikemcguff.com (mikemcguff)
KTSU 90.9 FM The Choice and Houston Public Media announced a new content partnership that will expand the reach of The Vibe, Houston's local Urban Alternative station. As part of this collaboration, Houston Public Media will broadcast The Vibe on its KUHF 88.7 HD3 signal, replacing Mixtape, a service by XpoNential Radio."We are so excited about the partnership with Houston Public Media,"
18 Dec 11:34

a good news story

by Ask a Manager

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager.

A note from a reader:

I’ve been an avid reader for years, and have always appreciated your no-nonsense advice. I hadn’t realized quite how much I had absorbed until I needed it, though.

Earlier this year I started a new role in an industry I’m very familiar with. I was assigned to work with Cedric, who was at the same level as me in our organization’s hierarchy. It’s a small industry and word had gotten around about Cedric — that he didn’t deliver on projects, took 4-5 days’ sick leave each month, started late and left early — but it was made clear that I wasn’t his manager, so I just had to learn to work with him (the frustration was evident!). Our manager works from a different location and would be managing us remotely.

In week three, Cedric took me aside and said that he had been going through a significant mental health crisis over the last six months and had also been diagnosed as autistic, but didn’t feel safe raising this with our managers. He asked if I could have oversight of delegating his work, because he felt comfortable and safe with me.

I had a chat with our manager who was very happy to trial a new system where I oversaw the overall work program and Cedric’s workload, but development and performance were still managed remotely.

It’s been three months and everything is coming up Millhouse! It turns out he had been given big projects like “organize a llama grooming workshop” with no input from others, and no clear due date, milestones, budget, or agenda — no wonder he was floundering when you added in mental health challenges and neurodivergence! We now have daily and weekly catchups and one-pagers for each project with clear outcomes, we’ve designed some new processes together, and most importantly he knows I have his back. He still has some “wobbles” (his words) but they are much less frequent, and he’s been super proactive about working out what has caused the wobble so we can address it. (For instance, we have moved to a quieter part of the office with less sensory overload, and our catchups are mid-morning once he has settled in for the day.)

My manager is astounded at the turnaround, I’ve been promoted to team leader, and Cedric is smashing his work program. I’ve kept his confidences about his health, so if anyone asks I just say we’ve got some new ways of doing things that Cedric seems to gel with.

All that advice you dole out on the regular — be up-front about expectations, be kind, look for practical solutions, be friendly but don’t be friends with your subordinates, acknowledge that everyone has something going on in the background — has been gold.

18 Dec 11:27

God Locks Heavenly Gates After Spotting Mormon Missionaries Milling Around Outside

by The Onion Staff

THE HEAVENS—Groaning to Himself as the professionally dressed evangelists rounded the corner, the Lord God Almighty reportedly locked the gates of heaven Tuesday after spotting Mormon missionaries milling around outside. “Maybe if we turn off all the lights and pretend no one’s here we can get rid of them,” said the Creator of the Universe, rapidly motioning to nearby angels to stop playing their harps until the coast was clear. “Ugh, this is the last thing I need right now. I’m just trying to enjoy a quiet afternoon in My kingdom, and now I’m going to have to smile and nod while these weirdos go on and on about The Watchtower. Or wait, is that Jehovah’s Witnesses? Whatever, same thing. But what else am I supposed to do—tell them I think their religion is bullshit and slam the gate in their face? I wish.” At press time, reports confirmed God was cursing Himself after one of the missionaries had spotted Him crouching behind His throne.

The post God Locks Heavenly Gates After Spotting Mormon Missionaries Milling Around Outside appeared first on The Onion.

18 Dec 11:27

Doctor Warns Of Damaging Effects Child Obesity Having On Mall Santas

by The Onion Staff
18 Dec 11:26

ABC Pays $15 Million To Settle Trump Defamation Suit

by The Onion Staff

ABC News agreed to pay $15 million toward Donald Trump’s presidential library to settle a defamation lawsuit over anchor George Stephanopoulos’ inaccurate on-air assertion that the president-elect had been found civilly liable for raping writer E. Jean Carroll. What do you think?

“A banner day for Trump’s two great loves: the truth and libraries.”

Andres Belmonte, Unemployed

“Good. You can’t claim Trump raped a woman just because he raped a woman.”

Kendall Sabatino, Solitaire Champion

“It’s about time somebody stood up for guys whose actions don’t meet the narrow legal definition of rape.”

Christian Knopf, Team Namer

The post ABC Pays $15 Million To Settle Trump Defamation Suit appeared first on The Onion.

18 Dec 11:24

Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Ritual

by Zach Weinersmith


Click here to go see the bonus panel!

Hovertext:
I'm not saying you should do this, only that it'd be awesome.


Today's News:
17 Dec 21:50

updates: ex-boss wants to be my friend, telling my manager I can’t take work trips, and more

by Ask a Manager

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager.

It’s “where are you now?” month at Ask a Manager, and all December I’m running updates from people who had their letters here answered in the past. Here are five updates from past letter-writers.

There will be more posts than usual this week, so keep checking back throughout the day.

1. My soon-to-be-ex manager wants to be my friend … I’m leaving because of him

Right before my departure (and a week after you posted my letter), Joe threw a surprise going away party for me — despite me repeatedly asking and stating that I did not want a going away party. Fortunately, my work colleagues (who also discouraged Joe from doing this) gave me a heads-up. I was pretty pissed off as the party continued. It was really a celebration of how great Joe’s management is since I got a huge promotion… and I couldn’t have done it without him … So I took your advice immediately!

Our last 1:1 was scheduled following the going away party and the topic was my experience in the department. So as we started, I shared (paraphrasing): “I am deeply disappointed that you did not respect my wishes related to a going away party. You repeatedly disrespected my boundaries and disregarded my feedback while working here. I do not see a reason for me to continue to share feedback, and I see no reason to continue a personal or professional relationship.” He immediately said, “Won’t you need me as a reference?” To which I responded, “I do not believe using you as a reference would be beneficial to my professional reputation.” I then shared some examples of times he disregarded my feedback. Joe was shocked and emotional — and the meeting ended in less than five minutes. I also scheduled an exit interview with HR for the same day, which is typically not done when you receive a promotion or lateral transfer.

Joe is now receiving executive coaching in coordination with HR and we haven’t spoken since. He ignores me in meetings and has chosen not to fill my old role until he does more “soul-searching” (no, I don’t know what that means either). And me? I am absolutely thriving and have never been happier. I have an incredible supervisor and a great team, and I am doing interesting work all over the state. My new supervisor has already recommended to HR that I get another raise and/or promotion next month!

To everyone who commented: I wasn’t ready to interact in the comments at the time the letter was posted (and there are a lot now!) but I read them all and was deeply appreciative. Several made me laugh and one made me cry, reading about your own experience. Your kindness and encouragement helped me confidently enter my new role. Thank you!

2. Should I bring up that our in-office rule is enforced inconsistently on our team? (#4 at the link)

I’d like to thank you and the other readers in the comments for answering my question! As a lifelong goody-two shoes/rule follower, I was overthinking this one I think, so the response really helped me come back down to Earth. Nothing too exciting to report — I resolved to go in one day a week to align with my other team mates schedule, and planned to just suck it up and come in two days a week if my boss or other upper management brought it up. No one ever did.

Unfortunately, my team was subject to layoffs last month so I’m no longer with the company (nothing to do with in-office attendance or performance, all financial). Onwards and upwards to (hopefully) all remote work.

3. How do I gracefully tell my manager I cannot take work trips? (#4 at the link)

I was able to avoid the business trip using your script and have been able to successfully advocate for my needs since then. I was actually able to skip the baseball game this year by being a little more direct with my manager — I didn’t disclose my specific mental health condition, but I did ask not to attend due to the fact that large crowds caused a degree of medical stress that would significantly reduce my function for almost a week. I offered to provide a doctor’s note, but my manager gave me permission not to attend, and said a doctor’s note would not be needed. He alerted the organizer and promised to keep the reason confidential.

Some commenters may take the same position as my mother – that I should be actively working on being able to be in a giant, open stadium with several thousand strangers without having a panic attack. My view is that going to baseball games is not generally a core requirement of software development. Sometimes, the best way to manage triggers is to understand and avoid them. However, I took the comments to heart that travel to conferences may not be one of those situations, and worked with my therapist to develop a plan that would make travel more comfortable. Things such as having a map of the conference on hand, creating a schedule ahead of time of where I want or need to be, building in time to decompress, having a “work buddy” or identifying coworkers who are safe to be around, knowing private places I can duck to if I need a moment to myself, and traveling with a partner. I have not been asked to attend a conference since then, so I haven’t been able to test this, but having the plan makes me a lot more comfortable.

Unfortunately, due to some unrelated issues I have with the company, I’m currently job-searching. I hope that I can work these issues out without needing a new job – I really like the work I do! – but there’s only so much I can control. I am eternally grateful to you and your community for your kindness and advice.

4. My drunken boss tried to kiss me but it’s been handled — what do I say to coworkers? (#3 at the link)

I did use some of the advice you gave but in the end it didn’t come up all that much. An advantage of being fully remote and a general team restructure happening around the same time that obfuscated it a fair bit.

It’s also ended up being the case that the manager has moved on from the company to another one for an entirely unrelated reason, so it’s very much no-longer a topic of conversation at all in an organic way. All’s well that ends well, I guess!

5. Can I back out of a chaotic freelance project? (#2 at the link)

I did back out of the project, wording it similarly to how you suggested. In the process, I messaged the one artist I’d started to tentatively make friends with and let her know the real reason, that I didn’t think the art show was going to happen no matter how much time everyone had to prepare and even though it was theoretically a great opportunity, I didn’t think it was worth waiting around for. She agreed with me and dropped out a few weeks afterward. In those few weeks, though, she relayed to me that one or two more people dropped, it was down to the leader and her handful of best friends, and they were gamely saying “we can do it without you, so there” even as everything fell apart.

When I saw your request for updates, I searched online – I can’t see any evidence of the art show having eventually happened. I don’t know how much drama was involved or whether it went down in sensational flames versus simply being tabled indefinitely, but leaving was obviously the right call. I still chat with my new acquaintance on social media sometimes and she seems like a great person to know in this small industry, even if she’s not a huge name, so at least I got something out of the whole debacle!

17 Dec 17:31

‘No Way To Prevent This,’ Says Only Nation Where This Regularly Happens

by The Onion Staff

MADISON, WI—In the hours following a violent rampage in Wisconsin in which a lone attacker killed at least two individuals and injured six others, citizens living in the only country where this kind of mass killing routinely occurs reportedly concluded Monday that there was no way to prevent the massacre from taking place. “This was a terrible tragedy, but sometimes these things just happen and there’s nothing anyone can do to stop them,” said Maryland resident Jonathan Pallard, echoing sentiments expressed by tens of millions of individuals who reside in a nation where over half of the world’s deadliest mass shootings have occurred in the past 50 years and whose citizens are 20 times more likely to die of gun violence than those of other developed nations. “It’s a shame, but what can we do? There really wasn’t anything that was going to keep this individual from snapping and killing a lot of people if that’s what they really wanted.” At press time, residents of the only economically advanced nation in the world where roughly two mass shootings have occurred every month for the past eight years were referring to themselves and their situation as “helpless.”

The post ‘No Way To Prevent This,’ Says Only Nation Where This Regularly Happens appeared first on The Onion.

17 Dec 17:29

Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Strategy

by Zach Weinersmith


Click here to go see the bonus panel!

Hovertext:
Don't you all use the SSMS trick at once or it'll stop being offputting.


Today's News:
17 Dec 17:28

The Philosophy Store

by Corey Mohler
PERSON: "Welcome to the philosophy store, i'm Wittgenstein, where we stock all your philosophy needs. "

PERSON: "But i'm interested in it."

PERSON: "Yes, i'm looking for some metaphysics."

PERSON: "Let me show you some nice philosophy of science, which shows that metaphysics..."

PERSON: "Metaphysics? No, metaphysics is outdated, you don't want that."

PERSON: "I want metaphysics!"

PERSON: "Whoa whoa, Wittgenstein, cool down. Don't you remember, the customer is always right?"

PERSON: "But Kant,  he's being an idiot!"

PERSON: "Alright, get out! Store policy."

PERSON: "I am always wrong."
16 Dec 17:18

Trans in the Heart of Texas

by April Maria Ortiz

One night last summer, I went out with my wife. Through the restaurant windows, we could see the Uvalde town square: the crossroads of America. This is where we live.

“Hello, ladies,” our waiter said. “What can I get you to drink?” I saw to my surprise that he was one of my college students. He’d been taking classes for several years, but I hadn’t seen him lately. When he brought our drinks out, I tried to encourage him to come finish his degree. Bafflement gathered on his face: Who is this lady?

Rumor has legs in Uvalde. Still, every day I encounter people who don’t know about me. I feel so at ease now, sometimes I forget how different my presentation is. Oh, right, I thought. That. “You do know that I’m your professor, right?” I asked. “I’m Dr. Ortiz.”

His mouth popped open. “I didn’t realize!”

“I’m used to that,” I laughed, and we kept talking.

Inadvisedly, perhaps, I’d come out as transgender through a Texas Observer essay, begun living full-time as a woman, and started gender-affirming hormone replacement therapy all at once in March of last year. I’m not normally so wont to jump into the deep end, but there’s no discreet way to transition in a small town. Just shaving my face occasioned so much remark that I knew it would be impossible to take the gradual approach. For the sake of my family and of my own sanity, people needed to know what was happening. And so, ready or not, out of the closet I came.

It wasn’t graceful, but it was done, and for the first time I hoped I could make sense of my life. Sometimes I’m asked whether I’ve tried just not being trans. My answer is simple: Yes, for 40 years. For 40 years, I did everything I could to mortify this seemingly innate sense of self. The thing people don’t understand is that, when I came out, I didn’t start trying to be something I wasn’t. I stopped trying.

I laugh more, and when I laugh, my heart rises.

Given the political rhetoric swirling about these days, I wasn’t optimistic about my reception in Uvalde. And, yes, some families at my kids’ school move away when I sit to watch a basketball game. Yes, pews sometimes clear out around me at church, though that happens less now than it used to. But, overall, things have been better than I’d imagined. 

People know me from a column about math I used to write for the Uvalde Leader-News. So, a few months ago, I decided to write an op-ed about my identity. After it came out, an elderly woman came up to me after mass. “Thank you for writing your article,” she said. “I believe we all just need to be who we are.” That sums up my experience. People have told me that simply knowing me has changed their minds about trans people.

Seventh grade biology notwithstanding, sex is less a pair of mutually exclusive cubbyholes than two fuzzy sets shading into one another. As research ecologist Joan Roughgarden points out in her book Evolution’s Rainbow, every biological sexual distinction (chromosomes, hormones, genitals) has naturally occurring exceptions. Further, when one person genders another—that is, assigns them a gender based on their own observations—they aren’t relying on these biological distinctions, which are invisible to them, but on secondary characteristics and presentation. This gendering takes only a fraction of a second and is largely unconscious.

Not long after I began taking estrogen, which makes my body more feminine, and presenting in a way that comes naturally to me, I clicked over from one binary category to the other in the eyes of strangers. This came as a relief: For the first time in my life, others perceived me as I felt myself to be. But my sense of self is about more than social roles. It’s chiefly about my relationship to my own body. Even before the estrogen had time to actually alter my figure, I felt overcome with a sense of wholeness. I laugh more, and when I laugh, my heart rises. I’m more present to my family. My friends tell me that even my eyes are different. I am alive.

It provokes consternation in some people that my household has remained intact, that I don’t live up to the sensational stereotypes that movies and television have presented them with over the years. It is true that our family has an unusual shape: Two of my kids call me “mommy” and one calls me “dad.” But we’re more or less the same as we’ve always been, except perhaps more so, and happier.

Work, too, has been drama-free. Gender doesn’t come up in calculus and geometry. Some of my students discovered my identity through my writing or by hearing my interview with Krys Boyd of KERA. Once my appearance had changed sufficiently to warrant notice, I made an announcement: “This is a course in math, not in Dr. Ortiz. For the record, I prefer to be called she, her, and ma’am. Thankfully, we’re here to study real analysis, not gender.” And we moved on.

My students responded by conspiring to throw me a surprise birthday party. This got them out of a day of presenting mathematical proofs, so I suppose in that sense I actually was a distraction in the classroom. Just not in the way some politicians insist I must be.

My happy but plain vanilla life stands in contrast to the lurid rhetoric and terrifying intentions of Governor Greg Abbott, his allies in the state Legislature, and Republican lawmakers across the country, as well as the goals of Project 2025, the Heritage Foundation’s extremist blueprint for America’s future. Friends out of state urge me to leave Texas, which is where I have always lived. They fear for my safety. Some trans people I know refuse even to travel through Texas.

Their fears are not unwarranted. What I’ve found, however, is that even in rural Texas the average person couldn’t care less about my gender. Most Texans who know me and hear my story are supportive, wherever they happen to lie on the political spectrum. They may not understand it, but they accept it and move on. Those who do shun, hate, or fear seem, in my view, to be either insecure in their own identity or to be captured by merchants of fear in right-wing media.

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Trans people endure constant psychic strain as we make our spaces and serve our communities while lawmakers plot our extinction. But the staged uproar over our supposed effrontery has less to do with reality than with our antagonists’ covert aims and unexamined anxieties. Someone I know recently suggested that trans people bring hate upon our own heads by always seeking attention and affirmation. The prosaic truth is that we simply want to exist.

When my wife and I went out for our 24th anniversary in June, my student, now a college graduate, waited on our table again, and he told us his plans for the future. More recently, I had the honor of recommending him to a public school where he’d applied for a job. I think he’ll be an excellent teacher.

No, I don’t hunger for attention. I just want to go on being who I am—wife, mother, teacher, friend—in peace. I want to go on doing so in the light of day, without fear. That’s all any trans Texan asks.

The post Trans in the Heart of Texas appeared first on The Texas Observer.

16 Dec 17:12

Warm until Wednesday, also we take our first tentative stab at a Christmas Day forecast

by Eric Berger

In brief: It decidedly did not feel like the holidays this weekend in Houston, and we’ve got a few more warm and muggy days before a front arrives to bring much more seasonal weather into the forecast. There will be plenty of drier air and chilly temperatures this coming weekend. But what of Christmas Day?

December is half over

Believe it or not, the month of December is half over. Until this weekend, the Houston region was experiencing fairly normal weather for this time of year. But highs this weekend were quite a bit above normal. In fact, Sunday morning’s low temperature of 66 degrees was a couple of degrees warmer than the typical high for mid-December. We’ll remain fairly warm and muggy until the arrival of a front on Wednesday afternoon or evening, which will bring cooler conditions through the weekend. As for the upcoming Christmas holiday forecast, I’ll make an attempt below.

Temperatures this weekend were out of family. (National Weather Service)

Monday and Tuesday

The first two days of this week will be much the same, with high temperatures in the vicinity of the upper 70s to 80 degrees. With sticky dewpoints and light southwesterly winds, each morning will also be a candidate for fog, especially in coastal counties. Skies will be partly sunny during the daytime, with nights muggy and only dropping into the mid- to upper-60s for most locations. There will be a chance for some (mostly) light showers each day, but they will be pretty isolated. All in all, not very festive.

Wednesday

But fortunately, change is coming. Wednesday will start out much the same as the previous two days, which is to say warm and muggy. Some time, probably during the afternoon but it could be earlier or later, a front will move down from the northwest. There is likely to be a broken line of showers, and possibly a few thunderstorms, with the front. However, at least half of us, and perhaps more, are unlikely to see much rain. Anyway, temperatures will drop pretty quickly after the front’s passage, so you’ll notice it. Houston should reach highs in at least the mid-70s before the front cools us down. Lows on Wednesday night will drop into the 40s for inland areas, and 50s for the urban core of Houston and the coast.

Saturday morning should be the coldest of the week with a reinforcing front. (Weather Bell)

Thursday, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday

The second half of the week looks to be mostly sunny and significantly cooler, with dry air. Thursday and Friday should be in the 60s, with lows around 50, and Saturday and Sunday a bit cooler still as a reinforcing push arrives. Lows this weekend should drop into the 40s in Houston, with the upper 30s possible for far inland areas. The last full weekend before Christmas should feel very holiday-like!

And what lies under the tree for Christmas Day?

Only a fool would try to make a point forecast for nine days from now, but I will step forward this morning to be the sacrificial fool. It’s pretty clear that we’re going to see a warming trend by Monday and Tuesday of next week. But how warm will we get?

AI-Santa is puzzled by the Christmas forecast as well. (Grok)

Right now the best ballpark guess for Christmas morning is temperatures somewhere in the 50s, with partly cloudy skies. High temperatures probably will get into the low- to mid-70s. Dewpoints don’t look crazy high, so right now I don’t expect a muggy day such as we experienced this past Sunday. By the middle of next week the pattern will be supportive of rain, but there’s no strong signal yet for any widespread rain on Christmas Day. All of this could, of course, change. But right now the outlook is for an at-least somewhat pleasant day.

16 Dec 17:11

What To Know About ‘Mufasa: The Lion King’

by The Onion Staff

Mufasa: The Lion King, the prequel to the 2019 photorealistic remake of The Lion King, arrives in theaters Dec. 20. Here’s what you need to know about the newest Disney film.

Q: What can fans expect to learn about Mufasa’s backstory?

A: That before he was a big adult lion, he was a small child lion.

Q: Who’s in it?

A: The film is voiced by a star-studded cast of people on Beyoncé’s good side. 

Q: Is it a kids’ movie?

A: Mufasa: The Lion King is a movie for anyone who has 16 bucks.

Q: Why are we getting a Mufasa origin story rather than one about Ed the hyena?

A: Because there’s nothing Disney loves more than refusing to give its fans what they really want.

Q: Who is the director?

A: Barry Jenkins, who has bills to pay just like everybody else, by the way. 

Q: Why should I bother seeing this one?

A: Because sitting through 118 minutes of this is still easier than trying to figure out how to actually talk to your kid.

Q: When should I get up to go to the bathroom?

A: Whenever you hear Billy Eichner.

Q: Who wrote the songs?

A: Listen for five seconds, and you’ll know. You’ll know.

The post What To Know About ‘Mufasa: The Lion King’ appeared first on The Onion.

16 Dec 17:10

update: I might run into the person whose life I ruined at a work event

by Ask a Manager

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager.

It’s “where are you now?” month at Ask a Manager, and all December I’m running updates from people who had their letters here answered in the past.

Remember the letter-writer worried they might run into the person whose life they thought they ruined at a work event? Here’s the update.

I want to thank everyone who took the time to comment on my post. I especially thank everyone who spoke with kindness to me about my situation — I obviously still hold much shame for my role in this torrid love triangle. I was catastrophizing and projecting. I assumed this incident had damaged her as much as it damaged me — and the bulk of the comments got me to actually thinking that maybe none of this was a big deal to her at all, especially not after 10 years. So I decided to let it go.

About three months after my letter was published, in a similar meeting with my boss and the same board member, the board member brought up Sarah AGAIN as a designer for the gala-that-may-or-may-not-happen in the future for the project we are working on. And he repeated the conversation almost verbatim — that Sarah had been cheated on and left the area, but came back. I finally asked him how he knew Sarah was back in the area and she said she moved back to [major city over an hour away] and was running a few designing classes at a local nonprofit (which I confirmed on their website).

After the meeting ended, I asked my boss if she had a minute. And I calmly, professionally laid out the situation of one of the most traumatizing events of my personal life — giving my boss only the relevant details, and expressing my concern over Sarah seeing me — that I didn’t know how she would react, I could remain professional, but it might be best if I had a back-of-house role if this project did move forward.

My boss suggested that we go with another designer for the project. However, I didn’t want to take any work away from Sarah. My boss reassured me by saying, “It’s not [board member’s] decision who we pick if we even do pick a designer.” She also guessed that he was so fixated on Sarah because his wife had taken private lessons from Sarah in the past. There are plenty of other designers in the area, and if we even do this project, it’s up to event staff for scheduling any designers, not a board member. And, also, we weren’t even at that stage yet.

Then she commented on me having a better catch with my husband (who everyone in my job knows and loves). She didn’t know my ex personally, but she had heard things about him based on the breakup with Sarah.

So, based on no actual research but hearsay, I think Sarah moved back to our state a little while ago, but is well over an hour away from this small town. I believe she is still working in the job she picked up after she left here, and is doing design on the side with her old contacts in this area. Maybe one day she’ll move back to the area, but with housing prices the way they are I doubt that will be anytime soon. And even if it is … she has every right to move to this town, and I have every right to work here.

A few weeks after this meeting, I was pulling out of the parking lot of my local grocery store when I saw my ex. He did a double-take (my car is VERY conspicuous — I had just bought it weeks before we broke up) and then started smiling and waving as if we were old friends. I had sunglasses on and pretended not to see him, but it sent me spiraling. That grocery store is not exactly one along a major route — it’s mostly a neighborhood grocery store, which means he most likely lived nearby. I don’t know if it was healthy, but I looked up property records in our county using his name. Turns out he bought a house 1.5 miles away from me a year after my husband and I bought our house. He’s literally within walking distance of my home. Is it a coincidence? Probably … but I still feel so violated. He took so much away from me in the 10 years we were together, and for several years after that. He chased me out of a nonprofit I loved that we both volunteered at because he wouldn’t leave me alone to do my own thing there (kept trying to “be friends” and kissed me when we were doing a task alone — my response was to slap him), he has shown up to two previous workplaces under the guise of conducting business so I couldn’t kick him out, and even sent an anonymous package to my house a month before my wedding with books that only he would have thought I would have liked (it was confirmed sent by him when he was confronted about it). I don’t feel safe interacting with him, although I couldn’t tell you what I am afraid of, exactly. He told me right after I broke up with him that he had sociopathic tendencies … and I don’t really know what that means. I don’t want to have to look over my shoulder wondering if I’m going to run into him at the store with my child. I don’t want him anywhere near me or knowing anything about my life these days.

But I also recognized that my spiraling, so long after our breakup, was only hurting me. I’ve been in therapy ever since. But I don’t think I would have considered any of this as trauma without the wonderful commenters on this blog. And a special shoutout to commenter “Don’t Send Your Kids to Hudson University” for recommending the “Something Was Wrong” podcast. I’m on season 16 at the moment. It really did help me put my own experience into a kinder perspective, hearing similar stories of people who were emotionally and mentally abused and also struggled with letting go of these relationships.

So, still feeling lots of shame about the situation and now aware that a man with sociopathic tendencies who thinks he did nothing wrong to me lives less than a 5K race away from me, but I’m trying to navigate through it.

16 Dec 14:35

Justin Bieber Forgets Wife’s Name

by The Onion Staff

LOS ANGELES—Staring blankly at the 27-year-old woman sitting across from him, musical artist Justin Bieber told reporters Thursday that he had forgotten his wife’s name. “I’d just keep saying ‘babe,’ but I think she’s starting to catch on,” said Bieber, who admitted that he had “zero clue” whether the woman he had been married to for the past six years was a Hadid sister, Patricia Arquette’s daughter, a former Disney Channel star, or someone else. “I know I said it after our vows years ago, but after a while, it just goes out the window,” he continued. “Oh, God, she’s looking right at me. What is it, Harley? Holly? Hattie? Pattie? No, Pattie’s my mom’s name. I’ll just ask my manager to introduce himself to her in front of me. Shit, what’s my manager’s name?” At press time, Bieber was reportedly googling “Justin Bieber wife” under the table.

The post Justin Bieber Forgets Wife’s Name appeared first on The Onion.

16 Dec 14:34

Meta Donates $1 Million To Trump Inauguration

by The Onion Staff

Meta, the social media giant that owns Facebook and Instagram, donated $1 million to President-elect Donald Trump’s inaugural fund as the company tries to mend fences ahead of a second administration that could oversee major social media regulations. What do you think?

“That should buy Mark Zuckerberg a pretty nice prison cell.”

Vince Kasabri, Laundromat Attendant

“If Meta thinks it can just buy favor from the Trump administration, they’re completely right.”

Ann Shaw, Soiree Promoter

“Looks like Mark Zuckerberg wants to meet 3 Doors Down.”

Craig Grumman, Carpet Patterner

The post Meta Donates $1 Million To Trump Inauguration appeared first on The Onion.

16 Dec 14:34

Baby, It’s Me, Polio, and I’ve Missed You

by Jessica M. Goldstein

Can I be vulnerable with you for a second? I always believed we’d get back together.

Smallpox thought I was nuts. He kept telling me, “You’re delusional, bro.”

Rinderpest was similarly down about it. “They literally eradicated you.” I’m like, maybe look in the mirror when you say shit like that? Because I might be down, but I am not out.

And every time I talked about my comeback, Dracunculiasis rolled her eyes at me. “They all but wiped you out, man. It was one of the great successes of twentieth-century medicine.”

That was hard to hear. But I held on. I believe in manifesting. And I know you: You’re always saying that you’re over stuff that you aren’t REALLY over. You revive every franchise, and you reboot all your television shows. You “quit” social media. Look at high-rise jeans. And also low-rise jeans. Pretty much every rise of jeans. You count them out, and then—bam—just when you’ve finally cleaned them out of your closet, they’re back in fashion again. That’s why, despite everything, I’ve stayed optimistic.

I know, I know, “remember when” is the lowest form of conversation. But I can’t let you forget what it was like when we did everything together. I was the king of your world. I hit 1916 like a goddamn wrecking ball. More than 21,000 permanently disabling cases of me and more than 6,000 deaths, mostly children. By 1952, I was paralyzing and killing people left, right, and center. Rich, poor, presidential: it didn’t matter. Little ones under five were my specialty. What can I say? I love kids. I’m like the Matt Gaetz of infectious disease.

You were so obsessed with me. The only thing you feared more was nuclear war. I was all you thought about. You shut down your swimming pools and beaches; you avoided big crowds, movie theaters, and sporting events. You put your sick children in those awful, giant machines—iron lungs—because I’d paralyzed their muscles, and they couldn’t breathe. You did it all for me. Call me a dreamer, but I really thought it could be like that forever.

Of course, there were threats to our future. Salk in ’55. Sabin in ’61. Those nerds really did a number on me. Then in 1988, you launched a global initiative to wipe me from the face of the earth. I thought: Yeah, good luck with that.

But you surprised me. At my height, in 1952, I infected nearly 60,000 children, paralyzing thousands and killing more than 3,000. By 1979, I was nowhere to be found in the entire United States, and by 2015, I was only naturally occurring in two countries.

Not gonna lie; I felt pretty defeated.

And then COVID hit, and I was like, fuuuuuuck.

As if I needed another nail in my coffin. I knew that once people who were too young to remember when I ruled the streets had lived experience with a global pandemic and witnessed firsthand both the toll of a brutal, deadly disease and the miraculous preventative work that a vaccine could do—that would be game over for me.

But I forgot something important. Something really powerful and kind of beautiful: So many of you—a critical mass of you, possibly a majority of you—are really fucking stupid. And I’ve always loved that about you!

Remember before the polio vaccine how some of you were blaming my spread on Italians? That was the real you. That whole thing where you trusted scientists and listened to their expert counsel? Sweetheart, you and I both know that was just a phase. Deep down, you’re a sucker for misinformation, which is being pummeled into your brain at an alarming rate via a deliberately destabilizing media ecosystem operated by megalomaniacal carnival barkers and tech billionaires who truly do not care if any other person on this planet lives or dies. That’s what makes you who you are, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

So, I never gave up on you. I could see you were sending me little hints that you missed our time together: when you subscribed to Goop and started liking all those social media posts that were “just asking questions” about vaccines, when you elected Trump the first time, and then also that second time. You really gave me hope.

Now, with that brain-wormed Kennedy at the top of the FDA, nothing is stopping us from reuniting. I’ve missed you, okay? I’m not too proud to admit it. But I know that you know we’re endgame, baby. Once you take me back, I’ll never let you go. We’re in it for the long haul. Till death do us part.

16 Dec 07:41

Awkward Zombie - Fairy's Fair

by tech@thehiveworks.com

New comic!

Today's News:

Maybe after a history of being captured in bottles by inconsiderate adventurers, fairies in Hyrule have come to crave the situation's safety and solitude, as it shields them from their natural predators (other people who want to put them in bottles).

16 Dec 01:33

Trudeau orders end to Canada Post strike after learning Santa Claus not real

by Ian MacIntyre

OTTAWA – Prime Minister Justin Trudeau has ordered an end to the ongoing Canada Post strike after learning that Santa Claus, who he was counting on to deliver presents to the entire country this December, is not in fact real. PMO insiders report that Trudeau had previously remained confident waiting out the national strike due […]

The post Trudeau orders end to Canada Post strike after learning Santa Claus not real appeared first on The Beaverton.