Cowboy Who?

Editor’s Note: The following is by Molly Carnes, as told to Nico Lang, the author of American Teenager: How Trans Kids Are Surviving Hate and Finding Joy in a Turbulent Era.

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Seeing my teenage daughter, Ruby, stand up in her church and claim her space as a proud trans woman was one of the most joyous days of my life. Our congregation, St. Mary’s Episcopal Church in Cypress, held a renaming liturgy for Ruby in June 2021. After months in lockdown, we had recently received our COVID vaccines, and parishioners felt safer to share physical space with one another. Reflecting that feeling of jubilation, our church draped a Pride flag around its cross for the first time in its history, as a public demonstration of support for families like mine.

I saw my daughter, once a shy child who hid behind my legs, blossom that day. In the Episcopal faith, a renaming liturgy is essentially a big coming out party: It allows a trans person to receive a new baptism certificate reflecting their name and gender, thereby correcting the record of who they are and giving the congregation an opportunity to pledge their support. The event is celebrated with a short ceremony including scripture readings and prayers. Ruby, then 17 years old, told her coming out story: sharing the newfound confidence she had gained since she began transitioning and the burdens she no longer carried. Church had always been my daughter’s happy place, ever since she was a small child, but now that happiness wasn’t just confined to those walls. She was so comfortable in her skin, pausing her speech to crack jokes and make acerbic asides. A newfound bliss radiated from her eyes.

Given what a support our church has been throughout Ruby’s life, it’s absolutely infuriating to see Republicans in my own state twist our faith to argue that my child does not deserve rights. Christian lawmakers in Texas, members of my own religion, claim that trans people are sinful, bad, and broken, but that is anything but the truth. Trans people are a gift to the world. They show us how creative God can be, and they are the embodiment of a fundamental journey that every Christian must make. Each of us should ask: “Who has the Creator made me to be? What is the most true thing about me?” Trans people demonstrate for all of us how to be our most authentic selves in order to live the life for which we are destined, and Texas lawmakers would know that if they ever bothered to listen.

WITHOUT THE DIVINE COMPASS OF HER FAITH, MY DAUGHTER MIGHT NOT BE WITH US TODAY.

I have been meeting with Texas lawmakers for years as an advocate for my daughter’s rights as well as the rights of other young people across the state. Our state Legislature meets every other year, and the last time lawmakers were in session, more than 100 bills were introduced that threatened Ruby’s right to be the vibrant young woman that she is. We are very fearful of what 2025 may bring—especially with a new conservative presidential administration. In 2023, Governor Greg Abbott signed a ban on gender-affirming care for trans youth under the age of 18, and conservatives are likely to push that law even further. The current platform of the Texas Republican Party calls for blocking gender-affirming care all the way through the age of 26, threatening to prosecute parents and doctors who support these life-saving treatments for “child abuse.”

When I meet with lawmakers to try to convince them not to support policies that take away my daughter’s medical care, I introduce myself as a Christian parent, and I ask them to pray with me. My hope is to show that lawmakers who weaponize my own faith against my family don’t speak for me, and they don’t speak for affirming Christians all across the state. There are so many religious people like me in Texas who support LGBTQ+ people, but our perspectives aren’t often considered when Republicans preach about “family values.” When GOP lawmakers in my own state cite the creation of humankind as male and female as proof that God couldn’t have intended for my daughter’s existence, it erases the people of faith who believe that God doesn’t create in binaries. In my faith, God is a Trinity: Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. And there is not a single human characteristic—tall to short, light-skinned to dark—that is binary. God’s universe is vast and endless. 

Christianity was never meant to be a tool for oppression and division, yet the message of God has long been distorted by politics: Despite the apparent prohibition of same-sex relationships in Leviticus, the word “homosexuality” didn’t appear in the Bible until 1946, when—according to a recent documentary 1946: The Mistranslation that Shifted Culture—it was introduced in error. Previously, this Biblical prohibition was thought to apply to exploitative relationships, not loving consensual ones, the documentary argues. 

Further, while conservative Christians insist God’s design requires strict adherence to gender roles, Jesus never condemned nor tried to heal gender-nonconforming people such as eunuchs.

The God that I know represents love, and that’s what God has meant to my family. Before she officially came out as trans to the congregation, Ruby struggled with suicidal ideation, and having the care and support of her church helped her pull through. Without the divine compass of her faith, my daughter might not be with us today.

Ruby and I recently shared our story in American Teenager, a new book from LGBTQ+ journalist Nico Lang highlighting loving, supportive families of trans youth all across the country. Many of the stories captured in American Teenager are, like ours, stories of faith. Clint, a Muslim high school student, says that he doesn’t think about himself as trans because he believes that Allah is so much more vast and complex than our human concerns about gender. As he argues, the Quran explicitly avoids gendering its divinities: Allah literally translates to “the one,” the unification of male and female. Meanwhile, the prophet Muhammad is represented in artistic works not as a man with a physical body but an ethereal cloud, floating above our mundane problems. Fortunately, Clint hasn’t encountered the same oppression from his lawmakers as my daughter has because he lives in Illinois, a state where his political leaders have allowed him to be whatever kind of kid he wants to be.

My family chose to participate in American Teenager after years of fighting the Texas Legislature because we felt as if we had no choice but to be as loud as possible. Republican leaders in Texas have already begun filing new bills for yet another year of attacks, including stripping away the right of Texans, like Ruby, to have an accurate driver’s license or birth certificate. Having legal documentation that misgenders her could be a grave threat to her safety, but Texas has shown, time and again, that it does not care about that. Shortly after Ruby declared her womanhood to the members of her church, she testified against anti-trans legislation at the Capitol. The reception there was not so welcoming. Instead of listening to what she had to say, the Republicans in the room checked their phones or looked down at the floor, avoiding eye contact. They already had their minds made up about what they believe God thinks of her.

As painful as it is that the most hateful among us are often my fellow Christians, their ignorance only makes me more resolute to fight for trans kids like my daughter. I will never stop speaking the truth, and the plain truth is that God’s love is so much bigger than anything we can imagine. It is a transformative gift intended for all of us, and it should be shared with everyone.

The post Trans Children Are God’s Gifts appeared first on The Texas Observer.

Election administrators say letting people cast a ballot at any polling site is more convenient for voters and cheaper for local governments.

In a letter to Orilla “Bill” Miller after the death of her husband, James Baldwin laments the inability of words to lessen the grief experienced after the loss of a loved one, a grief that exists because love exists, a grief that persists because love persists. “I don’t know if there is anything to be said concerning the passage of someone one loved — loves,” he writes, “for love does not exist in the past tense.” 

Through self-portraits, family photos and archives, appropriated and original texts, collage, found objects, and installation, Irene Antonia Diane Reece’s new solo exhibition exemplifies the nowness of love, even as it looks backward or considers what is to come. Her research and the resulting art are acts of love that navigate a family space, a culture space, and a history space — depictions and representations of a specific Black experience through the lens of the U.S. South. Her goal is not to teach, expose, or humanize the Black experience but to participate in the process of learning and unlearning and to protect and celebrate Black lives. To be sure, this is work that would exist with or without an audience. We, the viewers, are allowed in. It’s a vulnerable and generous gesture.

Like many lens-based artists, Reece has dealt with a love/hate relationship with photography, a medium that can be intrusive and violent. Photography is a process full of (or fraught with) potential — an act that exists and continues in time, before and beyond the moment the shutter is depressed. Certainly, a camera can be used in ways that are harmful, but it is no different from a pen or a hammer, which can be used in loving service to others or as weapons against them. Without a camera, though, Reece’s projects would not exist. The photographs, installations, and exhibitions become secondary tools — ways to share stories, to create the potential for additional encounters, and to continue to care for others. This is a more generative understanding of photography that allows space for chance, connection, and care, and it is within this space that photography can function as a modality for care and the camera, as a tool for tending. 

The very idea of tending implies there is something of value that is perpetually at risk. To tend requires courage and a commitment to continued action. I asked Reece if she thought of herself as the care-taker of this collection — all these photos, objects, and stories — and she immediately shut down the notion. “I can’t be that. I already AM that for people in my family.” After a pause, she sort of sigh-smiled as if considering that perhaps that is exactly what she is doing, that maybe this space is evidence of the tending she is doing, and that she may not be able to escape the fact that it is simply in her nature to care for those she loves.

The gallery is full of her loves: immediate and extended family, dear family friends, folks she has never met, and those she knows well. Two large installation pieces draw attention immediately. On the left side of the gallery, Hey pooh! is a recreation of a quaint living room complete with furniture and treasures from Reece’s family. The area rug, the sofa and set of photo albums, the side tables with delicate figurines, a push button phone, and a Bible with a small photo peeking from its pages like a bookmark may seem familiar, reminiscent of childhood visits to an elderly family member’s home. For me, all that is missing is an ornate glass jar of hard candies. Two portraits on the wall above the sofa show women facing away from the camera with memorial photo pendants nestled in their hair. One of them, a self-portrait called “I’m Always With You pt. iii,” features the three women for whom Reece is named. She values these women, takes it seriously that she has been bestowed with their names, and feels like she carries part of them with her. The mirror between the two framed portraits allows the viewer a glimpse of themselves, an opportunity for both literal and metaphorical reflection.

A second installation called I will hold you tighter than ever before consists of a large collage of vintage portraits, reprinted and arranged to perfectly mirror the desk-top original. Below the quilt of aged, monochromatic portraits is a mound of brightly colored, plastic flowers, and sprawled before them, a message — part farewell, part promise — spelled out with letters made of thousands of tiny alphabet noodles. To avoid stepping on the precariously formed words requires mindfulness and care on the part of the viewer, a trust that was almost immediately breached. In a matter of minutes someone had already disrupted one of the letters. Reece did not reshape the letter during the opening. I’ll have to return to see if it gets fixed at all, or if leaving it disturbed becomes part of the work.

Reece uses the tiny alphabet noodles in other text pieces — framed photographic prints of the Langston Hughes poem “Make America America Again,” and an original text called “I cried for you.” The latter, a poetic promise to “cry for you today and always,” stands in apparent defiance of the title of the exhibition, Don’t Cry For Me When I’m Gone. I asked her about the significance of the title, and she told me about attending funerals as a young girl, remembering that inevitably someone would break down crying, kind of falling onto the coffin, and her own father leaning down to warn her not to act like that when his day came, “Don’t cry like that over me when I’m gone.” 

All of the images in the exhibition are of (or from) her dad’s side of the family, and several feature her father: old, black and white photos; muted, retro, color photos; and more contemporary family photos that include Reece. She tells me about her father, that he is a writer, and that he used to read to her from texts by writers like Langston Hughes, Alice Walker, Nikki Giovanni, and James Baldwin, writers who continue to influence her and whose words sometimes show up in her art. 

Reece’s work seems to emerge from a deep understanding of human, especially familial, connection. The resulting exhibition, what she has chosen to share, exists chiefly because of the complexities of the human experience, particularly the capacity for competing physical and emotional responses to loss. The gallery is filled with proof that it is not only possible but necessary to both mourn and celebrate, to harness the power of grief to create light. Near the end of that same letter to Miller, Baldwin quotes Henry James. “Sorrow wears and uses us,” he writes, “but we wear and use it, too, and it is blind, whereas we, after a manner, see.” 

 

Don’t Cry for Me When I’m Gone will be on view through March 6 at Women & Their Work.

The post “Don’t Cry for Me When I’m Gone” at Women & Their Work, Austin appeared first on Glasstire.

DORF, an Austin-based exhibition and community space, has named Intel Lastierre as its inaugural Fellowship in Professional Practice (FiPP) recipient.

Last fall DORF moved into a new location at Zilker Point Development. In December, the organization announced an open call for its FiPP program, a year-long mentorship that provides a $5,500 honorarium and the opportunity for a solo exhibition. The program was open to artists in Travis County and surrounding counties.

The Inaugural FiPP selection panel included Alexis Hunter, a DORF Advisory Council Member and independent artist; Emmy Laursen, a DORF Board Member, Curator of Public Programs at The Contemporary Austin, and a Holistic Psychotherapist; Eric Manche, co-founder and Creative Director at DORF, and an independent artist and filmmaker; Paloma Mayorga, a DORF Advisory Council Member and a Mexican American interdisciplinary artist and independent curator; Lise Ragbir, a DORF Advisory Council Member, co-founder of VERGE, and an independent writer; and Sara Vanderbeek, co-founder, Executive Director, and Curator at DORF, and an independent artist and consultant.

Learn more about Ms. Lastierre below via a biography provided by DORF. Learn more about DORF and its current exhibition via the organization’s website. 

Intel Lastierre is a multimedia artist exploring systems of control through oil painting, installations, and photography. Her work examines the fragile nature of justice in a world shaped by oppression, drawing from her identity as a Filipino woman and her experiences with imperialism and censorship. She deconstructs societal myths and exposes contradictions within power structures.

Folklore and mythology heavily influence Ms. Lastierre’s practice, with the predator-prey dynamic serving as a recurring motif. Her reinterpretations of myth and symbol challenge ideas of identity and hierarchy while uplifting the resilience of the human spirit.

Her process is driven by form and texture, crafting organic shapes that blur the lines between the human, natural, and imagined. Through light, shadow, and color, her compositions invite viewers to navigate layers of meaning, finding beauty in distortion and truth in ambiguity.

In her installations, Ms. Lastierre creates immersive environments that extend her exploration of power dynamics into physical space, evoking introspection and discomfort. 

What distinguishes Ms. Lastierre’s work is her ability to provoke thought without alienation and to challenge without dictating. Her art remains grounded in present struggles yet envisions a future shaped by equity and resilience.

Ms. Lastierre’s work pushes the boundaries of form and storytelling, encouraging viewers to reimagine their relationship with the world. Her art embodies the strength of those who fight for justice and serves as a reminder that art has the power to question, transform, and inspire.

The post DORF Names Inaugural Fellowship in Professional Practice Recipient appeared first on Glasstire.

BOSTON—In an effort to avoid squandering any of the precious little time he had left, terminally ill man Sebastian Davies confirmed Monday that he was spending the entirety of his three remaining months of life reading up on how cool ninjas were. “I don’t want to leave this world with any regrets, so I’m packing each day with as much awesome information about the covert tactics and weaponry of ninjas—or shinobi, as they were known historically—as I possibly can,” said the stage IV pancreatic cancer patient, adding that while he didn’t usually buy into “the mystical stuff,” it did bring him some comfort to think about ninjas turning invisible and walking on water as depicted in manga like Naruto. “In many ways, these final days are the best of my life. I’m learning some incredible history about the Iga and Kōga clans—all sorts of badass castle infiltrations and assassinations via shuriken I never took the time to read about before my prognosis. But it can be bittersweet, too. My 3-year-old daughter is still too young to really understand how innovative ninjas were with their use of poisons and soft-case bombs. And my wife breaks down crying when I tell her I can’t dance with her like I used to because I’m buried in some wild book about how ninjas employed kites to fly over their foes and rain terror from above.” Davies added that while death itself did not scare him, it pained him to think that he’d be gone before the replica kusarigama he ordered would arrive in the mail.

The post Man Given 3 Months To Live Spends All Of It Reading Up On How Cool Ninjas Were appeared first on The Onion.

CHICAGO—Vehemently refuting the suggestion she was contributing to the displacement of the neighborhood’s current residents, local woman Ellen Fuller told reporters Monday that technically she was gentrifying the land of the Potawatomi people. “You say this was a historically marginalized neighborhood, which is strange, because all I see is indigenous land,” said the 30-year-old asset manager, who rolled her eyes and clutched her coffee cup, reportedly exhausted from the effort of once again having to assume the role of educator. “Look, I’m not trying to be a know-it-all, but I’m driving up the rent on Potawatomi land. We’re all settlers, you know. Sorry, but it kind of seems like you’re the problem here.” At press time, reports confirmed Fuller had resolved to gentrify the neighborhood twice as hard.

The post Technically Woman Gentrifying Land Of Potawatomi People  appeared first on The Onion.

WASHINGTON—Rushing to purchase the hoofed mammals before the Trump administration’s tariffs on Canadian imports went into effect, Americans across the country were reportedly stockpiling moose on Monday. “Prices of moose are already high, and I’m worried with these tariffs, they could surge even higher,” said 43-year-old Iowa City, IA resident Zachary Beattie, who was just one of millions of Americans loading up their shopping carts and stuffing the trunks of their cars with the largest member of the deer family. “The president says this will strengthen the power of the American moose, but I don’t know. All I’m saying is when the time comes, I’m not going to be caught mooseless. I have a wife and kids to think about, so hopefully six moose is enough.” At press time, the U.S. populace was hopeful the month-long delay on Mexico tariffs would grant them ample time to stock up on jaguars.

The post Americans Start Stockpiling Moose Ahead Of Tariffs appeared first on The Onion.

WASHINGTON—Saying he was just more deadweight hampering the executive branch’s ability to function efficiently, Elon Musk confirmed Monday that he had offered himself $10 billion to resign from his position as head of President Trump’s Department of Government Efficiency. “Like many other federal employees, I too have been presented with a buyout option as part of my effort to create a more streamlined and flexible government workforce,” said Musk, adding that he had given himself until Feb. 6 to accept the terms of a “dignified, fair departure” from his government position. “On the one hand, this job has been really, really good to me. On the other, it might make sense to quit now and avoid the risk of being downsized by myself later on.” At press time, Musk had reportedly upped his buyout offer to $20 billion but had yet to convince himself that number was anywhere close to what he could rake in with unprecedented control of the federal bureaucracy.

The post Elon Musk Offers Self $10 Billion Federal Buyout appeared first on The Onion.

WASHINGTON—In an effort to assuage any fears over the constitutionality of the Trump administration’s flurry of executive actions, a D.C.-area think tank called The Himmler Institute reportedly assured the nation Monday that this is all perfectly legal. “We’ve studied the total legality of far-reaching executive actions for decades, and we can guarantee that everything happening in Washington right now is completely above board,” said Himmler Institute spokesperson Stephanie Heydrich-Skorzeny, adding that this was one of the clearest-cut cases the Institute had seen since its founding in 1947. “We’ve put together some of the brightest legal minds America, Germany, and Argentina have ever produced, and they’ve concluded that there’s no reason to worry about the current situation resulting in any sort of constitutional crisis. These executive orders are nothing more than a simple and effective way to seize power. If anything, Trump’s actions are merely reversing the illegal actions of past administrations who betrayed the American people to promote gender ideology and race mixing.” At press time, The Himmler Institute’s findings were backed up by a report from another think tank called The Führerprinzip Foundation.

The post Think Tank Called ‘The Himmler Institute’ Assures Nation This All Legal appeared first on The Onion.

By: Chris Standin President Trump has gone ahead with his long rumoured plans to put a 25% tariff on all Canadian goods sold in the United States (other than energy, which got 10%). He believes he can use brute economic force to make us bend the knee, and possibly even annex us. But he does […]

The post Editorial: Trump underestimates how proud, united and, most importantly, petty Canadians are appeared first on The Beaverton.

“Elon Musk’s government-slashing crew, the ‘department of government efficiency,’ has been given access to the federal payment system, exposing the sensitive personal data of millions of Americans as well as details of public contractors who compete directly with Musk’s own businesses, an influential US senator has confirmed.” — The Guardian

1. Find a functioning light bulb in a busy work area.

2. Strike the light bulb with a private-sector-manufactured hammer or other hard object.

3. Note any employee who pauses work at the noise or gets distracted. Refer them for Justice Department investigation.

4. Fire the first five people who try to sweep up the shards of glass. They are obviously Biden dead-enders who just want to maintain the wasteful and ineffective status quo.

5. Document the waste, fraud, and abuse of federal workers as they stumble around slowly in the dark, often bumping into each other and the walls of cubicles.

6. Declare a state of emergency in the work area due to decreased productivity.

7. Call in one of Peter Thiel’s high school interns to work with Grok to create a new staffing plan for DOGE.

8. Authorize an immediate consulting fee to SpaceX (nominal, $1–5 million), which is developing a low-orbit illumination system to make light bulbs obsolete.

9. As employees leave at the end of the day, lock the doors behind them.

10. Rename the office to something like the Bureau of Endangered Grout Worm Protection, the Gay Communist Puppetworks Promotion Department, or the Office for Sneering at Real America.

11. Permanently close the office and terminate all its functions.

12. Post on X that you’ve just saved taxpayers $1 trillion. Elon will boost.

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Today's News:

The New York Times used a programmatic approach to estimate the number of pages taken down so far since Friday. Ethan Singer reporting:

On Friday, The Times downloaded the list of the most visited government domains in the U.S. and began compiling the complete list of pages available on each one using each site’s sitemap, a file that outlines the structure of a website and is typically used by search engines to keep track of what’s on the internet. (Some sites, including state.gov and weather.gov, were not included in our analysis because we were unable to identify a complete list of web pages on their sites, or for other technical reasons.) In all, we were able to identify more than seven million pages across more than 150 sites.

We then repeated this process several times Friday night and on Saturday, and compared our new list of websites with those we originally found.

About 3,000 pages from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, 3,000 from the Census Bureau, and 1,000 from the Office of Justice Programs make up the bulk of takedown.

Tags: government, New York Times, takedown

HAMILTON, ON — With Premier Doug Ford ordering Ontario LCBOs to stop selling US alcohol due to President Trump’s tariffs, accountant Marianne Thompson has expressed frustration that she won’t be able to use that alcohol to drown her sorrows over the fact that she actually agreed with him about it. “I can’t believe (Ford) would […]

The post Woman who agrees with Doug Ford halting US liquor also needs that liquor to deal with fact she agrees with Doug Ford appeared first on The Beaverton.

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Mommy is a determinist and so the choice to not use birth control was deeply hidden in the structure of the universe the moment it began.

Today's News:

Mexico and Canada are Texas’ two leading export markets. Tariffs on goods from those countries could lead to retaliation, potentially hurting Texas more than they’ll help.

Since Rhea Young became director of the Houston-area library system in 2022, she was instructed to add more conservative-themed books to the shelves and an age restriction was placed on materials perceived to be sexually explicit. County commissioners also created a citizen-led book review board.

In 2022, the century-old former railroad bridge reopened after being closed for almost two years to repair damage caused by a fire started underneath its wooden frame.

The state's high court effectively upheld a 2024 appellate court ruling that found the city had been short-changing a special drainage fund that was created through a voter-backed charter amendment.

Lights, camera, preservation! On a star-studded evening at the Internet Archive, we rolled out the red carpet to honor the creative works from 1929 and the sound recordings from 1924 that entered the public domain in 2025. And what better way to celebrate than with a glamorous, Oscar-inspired soirée?

Guests arrived in true 1920s fashion, riding in a vintage convertible before stepping onto the red carpet, where they were met by the spirited Raining Chainsaws street theater troupe, who transformed into a fleet of eager, old-time paparazzi—flashing cameras, barking questions, and adding a touch of whimsy and Hollywood magic to the night.

Check out photos from the red carpet!

Inside the Internet Archive, attendees sipped on French 75s and Old-Fashioneds, classic cocktails that transported us back to the final, glittering moments of the Roaring Twenties. The theme of the night? 1929—the year of the very first Academy Awards—and we honored this cinematic milestone with an evening of film, history, and remixing of the past.

Lecture by George Evelyn on Disney’s The Skeleton Dance
Animation historian George Evelyn enlightened the audience with a viewing of The Skeleton Dance, the first of Disney’s Silly Symphonies. With its pioneering use of synchronized sound and animation, the 1929 short was a perfect reminder of how creativity from the past continues to shape the present.

Public Domain Film Remix Contest Screening
What happens when today’s creators remix yesterday’s masterpieces? Our Public Domain Film Remix Contest showcased the most inventive reinterpretations of public domain classics, where old Hollywood met modern storytelling in unexpected and thrilling ways. View all the winners, honorable mentions and submissions from this year’s contest.

Watch the livestream of the night’s festivities

As the evening came to a close, guests toasted to the future of open culture, celebrating the power of preservation, creativity, and the public domain. Thank you to everyone who joined us for this dazzling night of history, cinema, and community!

Despite CDC recommendations that everyone get their shot by the end of October, less than half of American adults receive flu vaccines, with many refraining due to misinformation they encounter online. The Onion breaks down common myths about immunizations and how they really affect the body.

MYTH: The flu shot is free.

FACT: While the flu shot is covered by most insurance, including Medicare, you’ll never get back those 40 minutes you spent in line.

MYTH: This won’t hurt.

FACT: Motherfucker!

MYTH: I had the vaccine and still got the flu, so it doesn’t work.

FACT: It’s your body that doesn’t work.

MYTH: If I’m allergic to eggs, I can’t get the flu shot.

FACT: If you’re allergic to eggs, you can’t get a western omelet.

MYTH: Hi, I had an appointment to get my flu shot at 4:45?

FACT: Your silly, artificial construct of time is meaningless here at the Walgreens pharmacy counter.

MYTH: The flu shot can have strong side effects like fever and fatigue.

FACT: Movie day!

MYTH: I’m pregnant, so I shouldn’t get the flu shot.

FACT: Honey, what? I thought you were on the pill!

MYTH: It’s too late to get the flu vaccine.

FACT: The flu vaccine can be administered safely up to two weeks after rigor mortis.

MYTH: Flu shots are only for kids and the elderly.

FACT: Kids and the elderly are just much easier to force into getting them.

The post Flu Vaccines: Myth Vs. Fact appeared first on The Onion.

WASHINGTON—Pledging to restore racial purity to the nation’s aviation programs, President Donald Trump assured the families of American Eagle Flight 5342 victims on Friday that he was doing everything possible to resegregate flight schools. “You have my promise that I’m working around the clock to make sure our beautiful Caucasian pilots—who are just trying to focus on training without any ‘woke’ distractions—will no longer be thrown together with the Black pilots and others like them,” Trump said in one of dozens of personal phone calls he made to loved ones of the 67 people lost in the tragic midair crash. “In this incredible country’s best aviation schools, we will have the biggest ‘Whites Only’ signs on each classroom door, so everyone knows that DEI is not welcome there. No more mixing in our cockpits. Only the whitest, purest pilots can fly from this day forward.” Trump then grew visibly emotional, adding that he was sure this was what every soul who perished in the disaster would have wanted.

The post Trump To Victims’ Families: ‘I’m Doing Everything Possible To Resegregate Flight Schools’ appeared first on The Onion.

The Colorado Supreme Court unanimously ruled that five elderly elephants don’t have legal standing to sue to leave a local zoo because they’re not human. What do you think?

The post Court Rules Elephants Can’t Sue To Leave Zoo appeared first on The Onion.

WASHINGTON, D.C. – With US President Donald Trump declaring 25% tariffs on most Canadian goods, American citizens have officially chosen the most circuitous and economically painful method possible to investigate what everyday goods originate from Canada. Washington insiders reportedly considered consulting Canadian diplomats, or even Wikipedia, to determine which household items are manufactured in the […]

The post Americans choose most expensive way possible to discover what goods made in Canada appeared first on The Beaverton.

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Trump administration officials are taking major steps to cut down the size of the workforce and federal programs at the Office of Personnel Management.

During an internal meeting Friday morning, Trump administration officials directed OPM senior career staff to begin making plans to cut the agency’s workforce and programs by 70%. Multiple sources with direct knowledge of the meeting confirmed the details of the meeting to Federal News Network.

Sources who provided information to Federal News Network on the condition of anonymity said the political leadership at the agency also directed OPM leaders to stop work on anything that is not statutorily required.

Trump administration officials told agency office leaders and associate directors at OPM to prepare briefs over the weekend detailing all of their work and programs that are statutorily required. By Monday, all OPM offices are expected to give political leaders organizational staffing charts with plans for an initial 30% reduction for both federal employees and contractors.

“People around OPM look like they have seen ghost. People are shocked,” a source told Federal News Network by email.

According to FedScope data, as of March 2024, OPM had 2,902 agency employees — 2,148 of which are career employees in the competitive service. Close to 1,300 employees are bargaining unit members with the American Federation of Government Employees.

Based on the conversations in Friday morning’s meeting, it’s unclear at this time what components or programs at OPM will be cut as part of the 70% reduction. But it’s likely the cuts will impact Retirement Services, the Federal Employees Health Benefits program, and other major federal programs that OPM runs.

OPM declined to comment on the details of the agency meeting.

The plans at OPM align with the Trump administration’s broader efforts to overhaul and majorly reduce the size of the federal workforce governmentwide.

Many federal employees remain uncertain about how to respond to the offer of a “deferred resignation” by the end of next week.

If employees don’t take the deferred resignation, the next phase will likely be issuing reductions in force (RIFs) and creating performance evaluation plans to try to further cut down the size of the federal workforce, according to a source familiar with OPM’s plans. OPM is also looking at the possibility of offering voluntary early retirements to eligible employees.

“This is all driven by the president’s promise to reduce the size of government. But this is cutting with a hatchet not a scalpel,” a source told Federal News Network. “They are trying to get the government down to a minimum set of services. We all know that this will affect the people who need the services.”

The post Trump administration directs 70% cut to internal OPM staffing, programs first appeared on Federal News Network.

A longtime Treasury Department official is leaving his job after a dispute with Elon Musk's Department of Government Efficiency (DOGE), which has reportedly been seeking access to federal payment systems.

"The highest-ranking career official at the Treasury Department is departing after a clash with allies of billionaire Elon Musk over access to sensitive payment systems," The Washington Post reported today, citing three people familiar with the matter.

The departing official is Fiscal Assistant Secretary David Lebryk, who has served in nonpolitical Treasury Department roles during his career of more than 30 years. President Donald Trump named Lebryk the acting secretary of the Treasury, an additional role he held for a week before political appointee Scott Bessent was confirmed by the Senate. But Lebryk "announced his retirement Friday in an email to colleagues obtained by The Washington Post," the newspaper reported.

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