allie

In his new book, Dance of Death: The Life of John Fahey, American Guitarist, author Steve Lowenthal cites a review of John Fahey’s performance at Hunter College in New York by the Village Voice’s Paul Nelson in 1975: “His guitar-playing is a deliberate mixture of psychology, order, mythology, poetry, and genre—all very exact, with the […]

I have the eating habits of a Jolie-Pitt child, so I was struck down with that nasty acid reflux shit and it felt like something was stuck in my throat. It felt like I was constantly deep throating the Hammaconda and that feeling will give you the tingles at first, but after a while it becomes really annoying. After every single one of your hippie auntie’s home remedies didn’t work, my doctor temporarily put me on the devil’s drug Nexium. Nexium’s side effects got me feeling like a bunch of abominable snowmen ran a train on me in a walk-in freezer. I’ve got the chills, body aches and my back hurts. But for a brief second, all my aches disappeared and my body froze up when I saw this picture of the regal, bitchy ebony dandelion judging all of the homely simpletons in front of him at the French Tennis Open in Paris today. The purple pill cured me for a second and it’s name isn’t Nexium.

While looking like the middle-aged wife of a traveling pastor in the 70s, Prince reigned over all those hos at the French Open. I don’t know who played, but I do know that Prince won the match. Not pictured are the dozens of peasants who are bowing down and throwing their home address at him, so he can come to their house and teach them the word of Jehovah. They won’t listen to the words coming out of his pretty mouth (mostly because he’s so tiny that the sound of his voice doesn’t travel that far up), but they will find a higher power when they look down and gaze deep into his magnificent afro.

Pics: Splash

Genndy Tartakovsky’s Cartoon Network series Samurai Jack and Star Wars: Clone Wars didn’t air all that long ago, yet they already seem to have been forgotten. This is a travesty I try to correct whenever cartoons are being discussed, and sometimes when they aren’t. These masterworks should be perched near the top of any list of the greatest animated programs ever shown on American TV. They should also land on any informed list of the greatest action filmmaking of all time, and the Russian-born Tartakovsky, who also created the great Dexter’s Laboratory and Powerpuff Girls, should claim an automatic spot on any list of the greatest action filmmakers. With his unerring grasp of composition, editing, and screen direction, his ability to move his virtual “camera” to conceal or reveal information, and his ability to build excitement through design, sound effects, music, and silence, he’s as much of a master as Steven Spielberg, James Cameron, John Woo, Kathryn Bigelow, or Buster Keaton.

I should stress up top that although Tartakovsky is a good storyteller, in a silent-movie sort of way — expressing what’s happening moment-to-moment through picture and sound rather than in dialogue — I never watched either of these programs for their plots, and I don’t re-watch them for narrative, either. I re-watch them for the same reason that I visit art museums, attend live concerts, and pause during journeys from point A to point B in New York to watch dancers, acrobats, or street musicians: because I appreciate virtuosity for its own sake. And that’s what Tartakovsky’s Clone Wars and Samurai Jack give you, scene for scene and shot for shot. Samurai Jack, about a samurai battling creatures, robots, and an ancient demon in a post-apocalyptic future, owes a rather large debt to Frank Miller’s purely action-driven comics, particularly Ronin and 300, as well as to the paintings of Katsushika Hokusai and the schlocky 1980s Saturday-morning adventure Thundarr the Barbarian. The Clone Wars envisions the events that transpired between the first and third Star Wars prequels, but concentrates almost entirely on military history: wins, losses, and quagmires for the Republic that would later sour and become an Empire.

Both shows were broken up into collections of short subjects that would show, say, Jack facing down a particular enemy in a foggy canyon or a menacing forest, or a particular Jedi taking part in specific military campaigns (space battles, land wars, urban guerrilla actions, rescues, and the like) during an intergalactic civil war. But the plot was never the point. It was always about the visual music that Tartakovsky, his designers, and his animators created onscreen.

Just look at this scene of Jack facing down the demon Aku. 

There’s so much to admire here, so many touches that bespeak tremendous confidence and control, from the way that Aku’s sticklike “combat” form seems to have been burned or sprayed onto the frame to the way the tombstones recede into the smoggy middle ground and background, to the percussive score (a common feature in Tartakovsky action) that gives the confrontation a ritualized, at times preordained feeling. At the :32 mark you’ll seen an example of what I mean when I say that the filmmaker knows how to use shot composition and screen direction to create surprise: Jack runs across the screen and passes a stone monument, which seems to slice itself in half vertically, revealing the demon (whom you expected to pursue Jack from screen left) behind it. The minimalist designs are exciting in and of themselves. I love the close-up of Aku right after he cuts that monument in half:

Solid black, white, green, and red: Those are the only colors. Less is always more in Tartakovsky. He’s the action filmmaker as sketch artist, only drawing what needs be drawn to capture the essence of a moment, the heart of an action.

The Clone Wars combined Samurai Jack’s punchy minimalist filmmaking with a dazzling sense of scale. The Jedi characters (whose ranks include such “names” as Obi-Wan, Anakin, and Mace Windu, as well as many more who were supporting or nameless in the prequels) are often juxtaposed against teeming hordes of clone warriors, robots, creatures, armored personnel carriers, hovercraft, and sometimes immense mechanical things whose precise purpose remains unknown until it’s finally revealed to us. Tartakovsky has that Steven Spielberg talent for building anticipation through silence and sound effects. Often a new and fearsome enemy’s arrival will be heralded by the disappearance of soundtrack music, then an eerie silence, then an ominous rumble, then some kind of visual flourish, such as a cut to an overhead shot that shows a shadow passing over our heroes, who from that vantage point seem pitifully tiny and hopelessly overmatched.

There’s a wonderful small moment at the :25 mark in this clip of General Grievous and his droid army battling the Jedi that illustrates what I’m talking about. The General leads his robot army toward a field of wrecked spaceships where beleaguered Jedi are hiding. The General stops marching and holds up his mailed fist. The robots halt. Silence. The scene zooms back to reveal the wrecked spacecraft, the robots arranged in an elegant diagonal pattern. Then there’s a cut to a series of shots of a lone Jedi, Ki-Adi-Mundi, sneaking about. Every shot looks like a woodcut (I love the use of foreground wreckage to create frames-within-frames). The only noise is a faint breeze and the sound of his footsteps as he runs.

I regularly re-watch my old DVDs of Samurai Jack and The Clone Wars (the two-dimensional version, not the follow-up that debuted in 2008, which is quite good but not on the level of Tartakovsky). They have never failed to mesmerize and sometimes astonish me. I’ve seen every episode at least three times over the years, and I keep noticing new things: bits of visual foreshadowing, background or foreground details I’d failed to appreciate previously, such as the irislike forest of thorns that Jack enters  at the start of the “Spring” section of “The Four Seasons of Death,” or the John Ford–like majesty at the very end of this Mace Windu adventure, with the Jedi and a small boy standing on a hilltop after a battle. These two shows are treasure troves of graphic design and pure showmanship. People remember Dexter’s Laboratory and Powerpuff Girls, as well they should: They’re classics. But Tartakovsky’s more abstract and daring Samurai Jack and Clone Wars should get some love, too, along with dedicated slots on Cartoon Network or its sister network, Boomerang (which reran Jack last year), and handsomely designed Blu-ray box sets with loads of extras.

Read more posts by Matt Zoller Seitz

Filed Under: samurai jack ,the clone wars ,genndy tartakovsky ,tv ,no respect week

It’s the return of the return of the 80s! Big hair? Check. Leg warmers? Check. Shoulder pads? Check.
Platform shoes? Check!!!

In memory of the absolutely fabulous Brooke (R.I.P.) from Gladie Lauer’s blog.

Filed under: Uncategorized Tagged: Cute or Sad?, Flashback Friday, Pups

My son, Kid Zoom, turned 17 yesterday. I’d had no idea what to get him for his birthday, so last weekend I asked him what he’d like. His answer kind of blew me away, because what 17-year-old would ever say, “How about you give me a stack of books that you think it’s absolutely essential for me to read”?

I swear I am not making that up. Kid has two English teachers for parents, so he was maybe doomed to be a hyperliterate nerd. OK, and his first thought was “how about a video game?” which I don’t think was serious anyway. It may have helped that, the day before, I’d handed him a paperback copy of Tim O’Brien’s The Things They Carried that I’d picked up at a yard sale, and he’d stayed up late reading it, so “Dad’s recommended books” was already on his mind. Even so, I was touched — not quite touched enough to overcome my usual habit of last-minute shopping, but I did at least put a little thought into the list of books I ended up getting him.

I didn’t really have any absolute criteria for what books I’d get — they didn’t have to be “classics” or “important,” just books that I knew I’d enjoyed reading. And while I was shopping, I decided I’d also write up a few notes on each book and add those in a letter in the card — now that I think about it, if I’d planned more, it might also work to put those notes into each book. And so, here’s my letter (and some of the notes, with notes on my notes, in David Foster Wallace fashion) to a pretty darn nifty kid:

Dear [Kid Zoom],

Happy 17th birthday! I’m genuinely touched that you asked for a stack of books that I thought you should read. And here they are — I won’t claim they’re the best or the most important books ever; you get to decide which books meet that standard for you. But I’ve enjoyed every single one of these, and I wanted to give you a few notes on each, in no particular order.

Catch-22: [Joseph Heller] OK, this was a gimme. You knew you were getting this one. Possibly my favorite book ever, except on days when you catch me thinking that goes to Slaughterhouse Five. [which I'd already given him a couple years ago]

The Name of the Rose: Umberto Eco] A book that sucked me into its reality so completely that I kept reading it during a class. And that was in grad school, when you aren’t supposed to get away with that.

Moby-Dick: [Herman Melville] Here’s how you read this book: Read it like a novel. Just read that first page, enjoy the weird characters, and don’t worry about reading it as literature. You may have a class some time where you talk about symbolism and stuff, but forget that. It’s a hell of a story.

Dune: [Frank Herbert] Another novel that will have you living inside its world, and possibly leaving you thirsty. There are far too many sequels; only the first three are any good.

1984 [George Orwell] and Clockwork Orange: [Anthony Burgess] Best. Dystopias. Ever. And everyone should have their own copy.

Kindred: [Octavia Butler] Magical, lyrical, and terrifying. One of the best time-travel stories ever, by Octavia Butler, a science fiction writer who feels like a special little secret because not enough people know about her. [Confession: I love Kindred, but I also have to admit that it was my second choice for an Octavia Butler title. This is where not shopping in advance bit me -- neither the indie bookstore nor the soulless big-box-bookstore had a copy of Parable of the Sower in stock. Best thing about book gifts: You can always throw more books at a kid!]

The Grapes of Wrath: [John Steinbeck] Read this novel and start a revolution.

Among Others: [Jo Walton] A book about the love of reading. And magic. Read it for the plot, and be ready for Dad to borrow it for the list of science fiction must-reads woven through it.

Love, and Happy Reading,

Dad

As it turns out, my last-minute shopping led me to miss three titles that I am just going to have to throw at the poor Kid later: Ursula K. LeGuin’s Left Hand of Darkness and The Lathe of Heaven, neither of which was in stock (Hey, bookstores! She’s written a lot more than The Dispossessed and the Earthsea books!), and I Know Why The Caged Bird Sings, which was just a big blank spot on the shelves in both stores I went to Thursday, for obvious reasons. Unfortunately, those omissions also skewed the gender balance of my pile of books, which as a feminist dude I feel justly guilty about.

It went over pretty well, and next year, Kid’s mom gets to give him her Big Pile O’ Essential Reading.

This gift idea may not work for everyone. I wouldn’t suggest it, for instance, for a kid who isn’t already a bigtime reader — for those kids, you want to find the one or two books that may open up the fun of reading, not a giant pile of parentally imposed homework. The other thing that might be useful about a gift like this: if your kid decides they truly want to rebel, it would be a really convenient thing for them to soak in kerosene and set alight while shouting, “I reject you and everything you stand for!”

The post Sometimes Your 17-Year-Old Suggests The Best Gift Idea Ever appeared first on Happy Nice Time People.

In case you do not actually have access to the Internet and somehow managed to miss it, there is a Reading Rainbow Kickstarter. Usually we do not write about Kickstarters because either things are LOLworthy or they are for nerds, but we’re 1000% onboard with Reading Rainbow, even though it is a thing that much of the Wonket Sekrit Chatcave is actually unfamiliar with, because it started in 1983 and it was for babies and we already knew how to read, duh. We tried to ask the millennials that were hanging around about it, but none of them could be roused to explain it to us.

No for real, you should give money to bring Reading Rainbow back, because you’ve got skyrocketing illiteracy rates, ‘Merica.

Right now, 1 out of every 4 children in America will grow up illiterate.

And: numerous studies reveal that children who can’t read at grade level by the 4th grade are 400% more likely to drop out of high school.

And: as of 2011, America was the only free-market country where the current generation was less well educated than the previous.

The Kickstarter seeks to raise a cool $1 million (and at last check was already over $300K) to bring Reading Rainbow to the web in an all-new easy-to-surf package and also too to bring it to disadvantaged classrooms everywhere. Burton estimates that the $1 million gets Reading Rainbow into 1500 disadvantaged classrooms, and there is not one reason anyone could ever hate on that.

Reading is great. There is literally no downside whatsoever to teaching little kids to read. And if donate, you get some Reading Rainbow swag out of the deal, like a totebag ($50 donation required) or a picnic lunch with Levar Burton ($2500, but has to happen in L.A. so suck it East Coasters).

If you’re too old to remember Reading Rainbow or are just a nerd, Burton has put together a pile of Star Trek-related swag because of course.

Normally we’d mock the ever-living fuck out of someone for paying $10,000 just to take a picture wearing the goddamn visor from Star Trek, but it’s for a good cause, so we’ll only jeer at you mildly if you’re doing that. Throw this thing some money already. You’re only going to waste it on cocaine or hookers or something anyway, so give it to a good cause instead, you degenerate.

[Kickstarter]

The post Go Donate To Levar Burton’s Reading Rainbow Kickstarter Right Now appeared first on Happy Nice Time People.

Hippies, Drugs and Promiscuity
Labin
1972

Dig the groovy cover? I do.

This is sort of a tell-all about the crazy world of hippies. In the context of this book, “hippy” generally refers to those folks that “reject the values of the established order.” However, they aren’t Communists (because they are too lazy to organize), or atheistic Marxists (because they like spirituality). They also aren’t cynical, like Beatnicks. They are different, because they embrace the use of “mind-bending chemicals.” (In this book, alcohol is not considered a “mind-bending chemical.”) I get the feeling that this somehow makes the hippies worse than these previous anti-establishment folks.

Labin gives everyone from the establishment a pretty good scare about those out of control kids. It reads like Richard Nixon lecturing on morality, sex and drugs. Every societal issue/problem is probably the fault of the hippies. If you are my age or older, you probably have heard most of these arguments from the older generation. It is an interesting read from a historical perspective and does belong in a collection somewhere.

Peace!

Mary

More Counterculture:

Dirty Hippies Living on Love (don’t miss the cover art!)

Peace, Love and Flower Power

Dope Fiend Training

Draft Dodger Handbook

Lenny Kravitz (50)
Brandy Cyrus (27)
Scott Disick (31)
Henry Holland (31)
Ashley Massaro (35)
Matt Stone (43)
Kylie Ireland (44)
Helena Bonham Carter (48)
Genie Francis (52)
Bobcat Goldthwait (52)
Tarsem Singh (53)
Doug Hutchison (54)
Margaret Colin (56)
Marian Gold of Alphaville (60)
Pam Grier (65)
Philip Michael Thomas (65)
Hank Williams, Jr. (65)
Stevie Nicks (66)

Postcard, no writing or postmark on reverse.

Found in "How To Build Modern Furniture" by Mario Dal Fabbro. Published by Magna, 1957.

-Click to enlarge photos-

[Photo: Bon Me, Kendall Square/Official Source]

Bon Me, a group of Vietnamese food trucks and a brick-and-mortar location in Kendall Square, is adding a new permanent location, reports Boston Restaurant Talk. This one will be at 313 Congress Street, the "oldest existing building" in the neighborhood, according to the design firm behind the project, Stack + Co. It's located right across from the Children's Museum.

The 1,000-square-foot counter-service restaurant will feature indoor seating as well as an outdoor deck, and renderings suggest that there will be plenty of wood and brick, bare lightbulbs dangling from colorful cords, and a wall-sized map of Boston. There could also be future expansion beyond this location.
· Bon Me to open a brick-and-mortar restaurant in Fort Point [BRT]
· Bon Me Restaurant, Fort Point [Stack + Co.]
· All coverage of Bon Me on Eater [~EBOS~]

It seems a Bebeh Moose was sadly orphaned this week. The rather confusing story of how it ended up at the Wild At Heart Refuge Center is here. Here’s the lowdown from CBC Morning North.

On the way to Wild At Heart, though- rescuer Stephan Michel Desgroseillers needed to stop off for some coffee at Tim Hortons.

And more photos, from the Custom Performance Coatings FB page, which apparently is authored by Desgroseillers.

Thanks to @LisaBrault and Alexandra M.

Filed under: Uncategorized Tagged: Moose, ResQte Of The Week

It’s that time of year. Dresses are being purchased. Corsages are being ordered. Votes are being cast. It’s the much hyped, over-the-top culmination of your high school career: it’s prom. Whether yours was 15 years ago or you're gearing up for your first round, let’s take a look back at the best proms none of us attended but all of us experienced (from the small and silver screens).

“Meditation brings wisdom.”

“Lack of mediation leaves ignorance.”

“Know well what leads you forward…”

“…and what holds you back…”

“…and choose the path that leads to wisdom.” -Buddha quotes.

“When the breath wanders the mind also is unsteady.”

“But when the breath is calmed…”

“…the mind too will be still…”

“….and the yogi achieves long life.”

“Therefore, one should learn to control the breath.” -Hatha Yoga Pradipika.

“Yoga is almost like music in a way; there’s no end to it.” -Sting.

“When you calm your mind and your senses, you become conscious of your always present inner self.” -Unknown.

“Your mind is your instrument. Learn to be its master and not its slave.” -Unknown.

“Plant the seed of meditation and reap the fruit of peace of mind.” -Unknown.

“Beyond meditation there is the experience of now.” -Ryan Parenti.

As seen on Bored Panda. More quotations here.

Filed under: Uncategorized Tagged: It would be too many tags

Royal Knits: Designer Knitting for the Monarchy and Monarchists
McGuire
1987

The world was just as royal-frenzied in the 1980s as they are now, so maybe this book is popular again! Charles and Diana were married and produced two princes in the early 1980s, and William and Kate and Baby George are all the rage now. I can see buying something like this for a public library collection, or keeping this if it was in good shape.

I’m still posting it here, though, since I personally find some of the projects too funny not to share. I especially love the dead deer slippers with the tongues lolling out (see below).

-Holly

 

More Rad Knits:

Sweaters from Rover

Classic Knits for Real Women

Just in Time for the Holidays: Soft Toys and Dolls

Teen Crap, I Mean Crafts

“Just a sec” = 5 minutes

“Just a minute” = 10 minutes

“Pick your brain” = 17 minutes or, in rare cases, 90 seconds

“Quick chat” = 48 minutes

“No more than five minutes” = 1 hour

“End of day” = 2 hours after the delivery guy brings dinner

“Quick meeting” = 3 hours

“Deep dive” = in the time it takes to eat half a bag of baby carrots

“Exploratory” = only the intern knows for sure

“Brainstorming session” = the entire afternoon, but everyone involved gets to sneak out early

“Could use a hand” = 1 week

“Could really use a hand” = 1 week + the weekend

“Onboarding” = 3 weeks that felt 3 three years

“Stint” = 2-3 weeks

“Gig” = 3-4 weeks

“Boondoggle” = 1 month of hotel food and daydreaming at strange buildings

“Pitch in” = 1 month here and there

“Help out” = 1 month + 2 harrowing weeks

“Assist on” = 3 months + 1 month plotting an escape

“Build-out” = why those tech people make shitloads of money

“Ramping up” = must happen before the end of the fiscal quarter

“Gearing up” = really should happen before the end of the quarter, but don’t hold your breath

“Strategize” = don’t ask, don’t tell

“Cool little project” = 6 endless months

“Wonderful opportunity” = 8 months

“Interesting opportunity” = 2 years

“Immediate need” = still hasn’t been resolved

“Got my start at” = too long or too short to fully explain

“Job” = holy shit, has it really been X years?

“Current job” = 1 more year and then I’m out

“Career” = 15 years trying + 5 years coasting + 15 years wondering if all that trying was worth it + 5 years just sitting there, collecting a paycheck, fondly reminiscing about the coasting

“Let’s revisit this later” = never shall we speak of this again

“Loop back” = 50/50 chance we shall speak of this again

“ASAP” = unquantifiable

Crusin’ with the Tooz
Matuszak
1987

Thanks to one of ALB’s twitter people, this title was suggested as a candidate. I really didn’t know who John Matuszak was, but  I just wanted a closer look at the bad boy pirate on the cover.  According to the Wikipedia article, Matuszak was  a football player (mostly with the Oakland Raiders) and an all around partying bad boy. He also started acting in a few semi-memorable 80s movies (Goonies) and TV. Shortly after this was published, Matuszak died of a drug overdose.

I suppose this has a place somewhere in some library, but I doubt it needs to be in mine. I would weed it in a heartbeat. Raiders fans might think differently. Any Matuszak fans want to weigh in?

I think I will check the catalog for Goonies and re-live the 80s.

Mary

More Celebrity Bios:

Super TV Stars

Do you really want to hurt me?

Keeping up with Bruce Jenner

Even More Juice!

Not entirely sure about this find, it looks like one of those "end of the year" type surveys you find in magazines or journals. This one is about music, and includes the former owner's top songs of the year and concerts attended. Also found in the book is a single photo, no names or dates.

Found in "Jack and Jill" by James Patterson. Published by Little, Brown, 1996.


-Click to enlarge photos-

“Mr. Stevenson”

Some stray thoughts:

1. I would like a businessman for a pet, but I would not like to take very good care of him.

2. It does not seem quite fair to show 15-second ads before a 2-minute video. I cheerfully endure proportionately justifiable commercials while watching a full-length episode of television, but upon my Sam, it seems a little hard to have to sit through ads nearly 1/4 of the length of the clip itself, particularly when I wish to watch a succession of clips rather than just clicking over to Netflix and watching an actual KITH episode. Oh, I seem to have solved my own problem. I shall click over to Netflix, and diminish, and remain Galadriel.

3. Aging is a natural process that comes for us all, and it is deeply uncharitable to remark upon the face of men who have lived well into their fifties as if they were spoiled lunch meat, but it makes me sad to see modern-day Mark McKinney and Bruce McCullough introducing clips of themselves, back when their faces were still possessed of a lithe and distant beauty that has since been stolen by the hands of Time.

4. I think this is a very good Kids in the Hall sketch.

5. Bruce and Scott made the perfect mother-son team, better even than Kevin and Dave.

6. I myself have never been possessed of a lithe and distant beauty, although once in high school my grandmother told me I looked a little bit like “that girl from The Princess Diaries.”

7. Every time I hear the first few notes of the Kids in the Hall theme song I feel inexplicably sad in the same way I feel inexplicably sad when I hear the first few notes from the Adventures of Pete & Pete theme song.

8. The “Business Time” episode of Adventure Time owes more than a great deal to this sketch, I think.

Read more Kids In The Hall Monday: Pet Businessman at The Toast.

Dear Sir or Madam:

This is a warning from your Internet Service Provider. Your IP address has been used to download and/or share copyrighted content, and accordingly your internet service is at risk of being suspended. We are obliged to remind you that the downloading and/or distribution of exclusively owned or licensed content infringes copyright.

We’ve been notified that in the past month, you have downloaded 250 GBs of music by Canadian alternative folk-rock band the Crash Test Dummies. We thought maybe it was an error on our end, but we looked into it further and confirmed that you did indeed download 250 GBs of music by the Crash Test Dummies, creators of the 1993 hit single “Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm.” We did some research and it turns out the Crash Test Dummies’ entire catalog of music, even including side projects by the band’s members, should just barely weigh in at 1 GB, leading us to assume you either found and downloaded 249 GBs of unreleased music by the Crash Test Dummies (???), or downloaded their entire discography 250 times? We are baffled and fascinated. We have a few questions:

• Did you think you were downloading something else?

• Is it safe to assume that you, having downloaded over 200 GBs of Crash Test Dummies, only listen to Crash Test Dummies?

• If you like Crash Test Dummies enough to download over 200 GBs of their music, shouldn’t you be buying it?

• Can you give us just a general idea of what your personal life is like?

• So was hearing “Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm” for the first time the greatest moment of your life? We bet.

• Are you one of the Crash Test Dummies’ parents?

• So, like, should we check out the Crash Test Dummies?

• Is there some kind of ironic resurgence of Crash Test Dummies going on? We are all in our mid-40s here.

• We’re wondering what you must look like and we literally can’t picture it. Can you respond to this email with an attached picture of yourself?

• Would you maybe want us to send you some recommendations for other good music or are you good with the Crash Test Dummies?

• Seriously why do you have 250 GBs of music by Canadian alternative folk-rock band the Crash Test Dummies in your possession?

• What are the file sizes on these mp3s you’re downloading? Like 6 GB each?

• In cases of extreme copyright infringement, the accused’s hard drive may be seized by the proper authority. If that were to happen, would they find even more Crash Test Dummies?

• Is owning 250 GBs of Crash Test Dummies music something you openly tell people about or do you try to keep it on the down low?

• Who do you think about at night before you fall asleep?

• Do the Crash Test Dummies still tour and if not how are you dealing with that?

• Say hypothetically you were forced to choose your favorite Crash Test Dummies’ song, and whichever one you pick, all the other ones disappear forever—would you lose your shit or what?

• What is your favorite Crash Test Dummies lyric that isn’t“Mmm mmm mmm mmm/Mmm mmm mmm mmm/Mmm?”

• We absolutely don’t want to get too pushy or throw around accusations or anything, but you’re not going to… kill the Crash Test Dummies are you?

• Wait, did you maybe catch some sort of computer virus that automatically downloaded 250 GBs of music by the Crash Test Dummies onto your hard drive? Do you even know that it’s on there?

• Again, any details about your personal life would really intrigue us. Marital status, hobbies (besides listening to the Crash Test Dummies), etc.

We remind you once more that we will terminate your internet service if piracy of copyrighted content is traced to your IP again in the future. We don’t anticipate this being a problem because we assume 250 GBs of Crash Test Dummies has to be all of it, right?

We apologize if this letter reads as judgmental.

When the White House task force released their recommendations on combating campus rape earlier this week, they promised that the Department of Education would make the list of colleges facing Title IX investigations over their handling of sexual violence available upon request. Activists from Know Your IX noted that in the interest of true transparency, that list should be publicly accessible to all in order to better “allow the public to hold both schools and ED accountable.”

Now the Department of Education has released the names. Here are the 55 schools currently under investigation: 

Arizona State University

Butte-Glen Community College

Occidental College

University of California-Berkeley

University of Southern California

Regis University

University of Colorado at Boulder

University of Colorado at Denver

University of Denver

University of Connecticut

Catholic University of America

Florida State University

Emory University

University of Hawaii at Manoa

University of Idaho

Knox College

University of Chicago

Indiana University-Bloomington

Vincennes University

Amherst College

Boston University

Emerson College

Harvard College

Harvard University—Law School

University of Massachusetts-Amherst

Frostburg State University

Michigan State University

University of Michigan-Ann Arbor

Guilford College

University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill

Minot State University

Dartmouth College

Princeton University

Cuny Hunter College

Hobart and William Smith Colleges

Sarah Lawrence College

Suny at Binghamton

Denison University

Ohio State University

Wittenberg University

Oklahoma State University

Carnegie Mellon University

Franklin and Marshall College

Pennsylvania State University

Swarthmore College

Temple University

Vanderbilt University

Southern Methodist University

The University of Texas-Pan American

College of William and Mary

University of Virginia

Washington State University

University of Wisconsin-Whitewater

Bethany College

West Virginia School of Osteopathic Medicine

Totto Ramen opens in Allston this Saturday, May 3, specializing in chicken broth-based ramen. This is the first Massachusetts location for the company, which has two New York City shops. Nghi Nguyen, a longtime fan of Totto, has left a law career to open up the Allston location after two solid years of sending monthly emails to the Totto ownership team, inquiring about expanding to Boston.

Around town, much of the ramen being sold is pork-based, but Nguyen thinks that American diners might connect more readily to Totto's chicken base because we're raised on chicken noodle soup. Here's the New York menu; Allston will be virtually the same. Take a look inside the space, a former frozen yogurt spot next to Tavern in the Square.

· All coverage of Totto Ramen on Eater [~EBOS~]

Happy May Day!

Originally sparked by the Haymarket Massacre of 1886, when police cracked down on peaceful protestors rallying for an eight-hour work day in Chicago, International Workers’ Day has enjoyed a bit of a revival in the last several years. In 2006, activists organized “a day without an immigrant,” and immigrants’ rights actions have been a big focus of the day ever since. A couple years ago, Occupy activists attempted a (rather unsuccessful) nationwide general strike.

In honor of May Day — and as inspiration for future striking dreams — here’s an image from the feminist archives of one the more successful general strikes in history. On October 24 1975, Iceland’s women refused to do any work — outside or inside the home — taking “the day off” from paid labor, housework, and child care. An estimated 90 percent (what!!!) of Icelandic women participated and 25,000 — a tenth of the population — gathered at a rally in Reykjavik. As you might imagine, the country was basically shut down. An article the day after said, “The militant women…staged their token stoppage to show just how indispensable they are. And the men, who treated all the strike threats as a huge joke, began to get the point.” The day was later remembered as ”the long Friday.” 

More than a century after the Haymarket Massacre, many American workers still don’t even have an eight-hour (paid) work day. And almost four decades after Iceland’s women proved how indispensable their under- and unpaid labor was, the second shift still falls mainly to women — and still isn’t valued as the real and vital work it is. So, um, make that “Unhappy May Day,” I suppose.

Maya Dusenbery is an Executive Director of Feministing.

Where did you get those plain white sneakers?
1. J.Crew’s New Balance collection
2. WalMart
3. “The WalMart”

What are you driving?
1. Honda Civic
2. Citi Bike
3. Log splitter I soldered myself

What’s your favorite Saturday brunch spot?
1. The IHOP in Bushwick
2. Neighborhood diner
3. Brunch? Grab a Hot Pocket and start raking.

What’s your go-to accessory?
1. Velcro wallet
2. Generic baseball cap
3. Gold chain with anchor charm, purchased at Tommy Bahama outlet

How are you styling your hair?
1. Classic crew
2. High and tight
3. Still growing out that man-perm your mom gave me

Where do you work?
1. Tech entrepreneur
2. Brand consultant
3. Retired (but not tired!) middle school science teacher/student council faculty rep

How long have you been rocking those dad jeans?
1. All year
2. Since 2012
3. Pants are really your mom’s department

Where did you find your glasses?
1. Warby Parker
2. Goodwill
3. LensCrafters (Transitions Lenses section)

Favorite curse?
1. Damn it
2. Darn it
3. Lord love a duck!

What’s on your mind?
1. The big game
2. Recycling
3. How could they kill that guy on The Good Wife? Your mom’s still upset about it—Are you just gonna stand here and ask questions while the lawn goes to pot? This is exactly what we get for paying your health insurance.