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Do you ever struggle to use up the milk in your fridge? Sometimes we buy milk for a recipe or a weekend brunch, and then it lingers in the fridge, half-used, with the expiration date barreling down upon our guilty heads. It's a sad waste to pour sour milk down the drain, and we're here to tell you that you never need to do that again.

Here are 10 simple ways to use up leftover milk, from quick and practical projects like homemade mozzarella and yogurt, to treats like homemade strawberry milk and a sweet, smooth liqueur (yes, booze!). And if all that fails, we have one simple tip that will make sure you never waste milk again.

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When reading the latest from Doghouse Diaries, I couldn’t help but think of the Little Jimmy Dickens song…

May the bird of paradise fly up your nose
May an elephant caress you with its toes
May your wife be plagued with runners in her hose
May the bird of paradise fly up your nose

But these modern inconveniences will do nicely.  

One donut to rule them all,
One donut to feed them;
One donut to bring them all
And in the darkness fatten them.

Eva B., a Lord of the Rings fan in Slovakia, forged this donut in the fires of Mount Doom. The only way to destroy it is to eat it. Who will volunteer for this dangerous mission?

(Jonathan Coffey)

We’ve all got kitchens and we all eat food, but not everyone can agree on where and how to store that food so it doesn’t immediately turn into a moldy mess or dry out into a worthless husk. Last week, we looked at the the best places and methods for keeping your bread, dairy and eggs fresh, and in this second Spoilage Wars installment, we’ll deal with the fruits and vegetables you endeavor to keep from rotting away.

Since we’re not the experts, we once again turn to Julia Collin Davison — executive food editor for the book division of America’s Test Kitchen and on-screen test cook for America’s Test Kitchen and Cook’s Country from America’s Test Kitchen — to learn from her experience.

GARLIC:
Where to store: Countertop
In a bag or not? Davison says garlic should be ideally be kept in an open basket with room for air circulation at room temperature. Don’t remove the papery outsides until just before use, as it protects the garlic.
What about those green shoot? Chances are you’ve encountered cloves of garlic that have started to develop green shoots in the center. Davison says not to worry about these. Just take them out when you’re cutting up the garlic because they don’t always taste so great.

ONIONS:
Where to store: Countertop
Be careful about the neighbors: Just like garlic, you’ll want to keep the onions in a ventilated space. In fact, it’s perfectly fine to store the two alongside each other, says Davison. What you don’t want is to have your potatoes and onions in close proximity, as gases from the onions can hasten sprouting in potatoes.

Speaking of taters…

POTATOES:
Where to store: Pantry or cupboard
Kept in the dark: Davison says your potatoes should be stored inside a paper bag in a cool, dark, dry place. And as mentioned above, away from onions and their sprout-encouraging gases. Sprouted potatoes are safe to eat, notes Davison, but you should remove the sprouts themselves using the tip of a vegetable peeler or other tool. The potato sprouts are considered toxic due to their potentially high concentration of glycoalkaloids, which can have an effect on the nervous system.

CORN & FRESH PEAS:
Where to store: Refrigerator
Keep ‘em where you can see ‘em: Don’t shove these foods into the cold recesses of the back of the fridge, says Davison. Instead, keep them in the front where it’s warmest (but still cool, because it is a refrigerator, after all). The fridge will keep them fresh but if it’s too cold, they could become dried out.

And when you’re storing corn on the cob, keep the husks on and wrap all the ears of corn in a damp paper towel, keeping the whole thing inside a plastic bag.

“You want to keep the corn is as humid an environment as possible,” explains Davison, “so no cold air can get in there and dry things out.”

KEEP THESE ITEMS OUT OF THE FRIDGE –
TOMATOES, APRICOTS, AVOCADOS, BANANAS, KIWIS, MANGOS, NECTARINES, PAPAYAS, PEACHES, PLUMS, PINEAPPLE
Where to store: Countertop
How: Fruit bowls and baskets don’t just look cute in photos. They’re good places to keep your fresh produce. Davison says that the best way to store tomatoes is stem-down if they’re off the vine. This prevents moisture from escaping and bacteria from entering, and thus prolongs shelf life.

The foods in this group are prone to “chill injury,” says Davison says, so it’s best keep them out of the fridge. This is especially true for tomatoes.

“If they’re stored in the fridge the starches really become mealy,” explains Davison.

FRIDGE-FRIENDLY FOODS–
APPLES, CHERRIES, GRAPES, CELERY
Where to store: Refrigerator, though apples, cherries, and grapes will all survive on the countertop too (just not as long).
How: While corn and peas have to stay up front, these foods are good to go anywhere in the fridge, says Davison.
An extra tip about celery: According to testing by Davison her ATK colleagues, the best way to store celery is to wrap it in foil first.

The next installment of Spoilage Wars will look at the best way to keep your condiments, oils, herbs and spices from losing their potency.

Today, it's the last day of my sign language class. At the end of the class, my teacher surprised us by speaking for the first time, also surprising everyone that she wasn't actually deaf. It wouldn't have been so bad had I not just given someone an answer to the test, thinking she couldn't hear me. FML

“My daughter and I had been holding hands and she was leaning away from me and our photographer caught the perfect moment!  So the rest of us are looking fabulous while my 2 year old is crashing into the pavement!”

(submitted by Ashley)

(I am working in a grocery store meat department on Thanksgiving day stocking the hams and turkeys as fast as I can. I have just announced over the speaker that we have five fresh, unfrozen turkeys left, and we are waiting for the rush of people to get them. When there is only one left, predictably two customers grab for it.)

Customer #1: “Hey, this is mine. I saw it before you did.”

Customer #2: “No way! I walked all the way across the store to get it. It’s mine! I’m going home with it.”

Customer #1: “Why don’t you get a ham or something? I need this turkey for my dinner tonight. You can get something else.”

Customer #2: “Listen, you fat cow, you can buy the f****** ham. I’m getting this turkey.”

(At this point I figure I’d better get involved and run over.)

Me: “Ladies, we do have fresh turkey breasts available as well as hams and ducks. There are even a couple of geese leftover—”

Customer #2: “F*** you! I’m getting this d*** turkey and there’s nothing you can do about it.”

(Customer #2 then shoves her cart into the other woman, causing her to fall into the display of stuffing next to her, and runs off with the turkey. Hoping it’s over, I go to help the other customer up, but she slaps my hand, gets to her feet, and tackles the other customer. I call security. Before they can get there I see that Customer #3 has spotted Customer #1′s now abandoned cart and purse. She runs over and dumps Customer #1′s purse into her own and then grabs just about everything out of her cart including a bag of prescription medication, before running off. I shout at her but she disappears into a crowd of people. Customers #1 and #2 are now rolling on the floor in the bread aisle while security is trying to pull them apart. While this goes on, Customer #4 approaches Customer #2′s cart and grabs the turkey and most everything in her cart. Security eventually pulls them apart and they are both arrested. Sadly, Customer #3, who stole Customer #1′s purse, is never caught as the cart was in a blind spot.)

KK decided to create and design for all the wrong reasons. Vindictive and nasty? Or a helpful study of everyday objects?

The goal is to re- design useful objects making them uncomfortable but usable and maintain the semiotics of the original item.