there’s a big difference between “food waste” as in “farmers destroy tons of food to avoid exceeding quotas” or “supermarkets throw away this much edible food because it doesn’t sell”
and “food waste” as in “it is not actually within the capacity of humans to perfectly predict and track household food consumption, so a certain amount of food per household inevitably goes bad and has to be thrown out every year”
The whole Pepsi commercial thing reminded me that people always mis-remember the famous flower in the gun barrel photo as being a young woman. It wasn’t. The photo, taken by Bernie Boston, is of George Edgerly Harris III better known by his stage name Hibiscus. He was a member of the San Francisco based radical gay liberation theater troupe the Cockettes. He died of AIDS in 1982 at the time AIDS was still referred to by the name GRID which stood for Gay Related Immuno-Deficiency. The photo was taken at a protest at the Pentagon.
When I was a wee thing, my parents moved out the the Highly dubious condo in East Palo Alto and into a relatively nice suburban neighborhood, into a house immediately across the street from my new elementary school. Immediate, as in, less than 40 feet from the traffic circle. Mom would wave at me from the driveway sometimes while I was in class. This should have made getting me to and from school easy, but there was an issue:
I still had to cross the street, and because I was living in the over-caffeinated heart of silicon valley at the time, that meant dodging the local commuters barreling through the school zone at upwards of 40 miles per hour with no regard for the stop signs.
The flashing “School Zone” signs were ignored. The city refused to put in speed bumps or devote extra patrol cars. One of my classmates grandmother’s volunteered as crossing guard, and some jackass in a BMW ran over her foot on the first day.
Now, mom declared as we drove Mrs. Manchez to the hospital her foot in a beer cooler full of ice, Would be a good time to take the law into my own hands.
So after dropping Mrs. Manchez off at the hospital, we drove to the thrift store, where my mom found a navy blazer, aviator sunglasses, a pilot’s cap and an old, clunky-looking hair dryer.
The next morning, mom went out to the sidewalk in her new “uniform”, with the hair dryer and a legal pad so she could write down the grocery list. Every time a car would come roaring down the road, Mom would look up, point the hairdryer at them, and, and write something down.
I remember listening to brakes squeal all day the first time she tried it, Mercedes and BMWs screeching to a crawl as they passed the school, glaring at her. By that afternoon, cars were creeping along at an over-cautious 10mph, and I was able to get home without taking my life into my hands.
After that, Mom went out “in uniform” every couple of days, because intermittent re-enforcement is what REALLY gets a change in behavior going, and point the hair dryer at anyone speeding through the school zone, usually while writing down grocery lists or short stories, or drawing unflattering caricatures of the other PTA moms.
Eventually, however, one of the cars that came through was a patrol car, and he slowly pulled to a halt in front of mom, glaring at her though his own reflective glasses.
She smiled an waved the hair dryer. “Good afternoon!”
“…What’re you doing?” he groaned, 3 in the afternoon entirely too early for this shit.
“Writin’ a grocery list.” She beamed, and when that failed to satisfy him, she explained about the speeding problem and that if they couldn’t send a partol car out here to ticket people regularly, she figured that a hair dryer would be the next best thing. Working like a charm so far. They didn’t even notice the little airplanes on the Pilot’s hat.
The officer stared at her for a moment longer before his face broke out into a slow grin. “Y’know, when we’re out of a car, we usually wear visibility vests. So more people see you and your… Phaser.”
And that’s the story of how Mom and Officer Brown met and started the neighborhood watch program.
I fucking love this
But did Mom and Officer Brown fall in love? Did he become Officer Stepdad?
My mom has been happily married to my dad for 30 years and Officer Brown married to his wife for even longer. Mrs. Brown got mom into quilting and fiber art and Mom took a class from her just last year. Dad and Officer Brown are still part of the same writer’s circle.
I trained the neural network to generate superhero names, based on the list from this site. I thought the database was going to be way too small, but the network proved me wrong.
Speet Stank Red Fart Mister Man Rad Food Sapgirl Woop Ann Man Boomss Boark II Supperman Superbore Slonk Lid Man Green Hooter II Starm Surper Shartar Goons Nana Rider Farm Captain In Redink Wolver Man Wizler
i started laughing at “Speet Stank” and I haven’t stopped
From September 2011 to February 2012, Missouri woman Rosetta Watson reportedly called the police multiple times to report abuse from her ex-boyfriend—once after he kicked through her front door and punched her in the face while she was in bed. According to the ACLU, doing so lost her her home.
I wear men's shoes. Not, like, a specific man's shoes. But I buy all my shoes in the men's section, because I either have men's feet, or ducks' feet, and they don't make shoes for ducks. This actually works well for me; I've never managed heels for more than a minute in my life.
My feet are big. Not in a potentially good way, the way that might grab the interest of an NBA scout. Or in the way that might set a woman to wondering. No. My feet are wide.
A 4K restoration of Luc Besson‘s The Fifth Element will be returning to movie theaters next month in celebration of its 20th anniversary. And alongside the visionary science fiction film will be an exclusive preview of writer-director Besson’s upcoming film Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets. Find out where, when and how you can attend one of these limited time The Fifth Element rerelease screenings below!
Presented by Fathom Events and Sony Pictures Home Entertainment, The Fifth Element will play in more than 400 cinemas nationwide for two days only: Sunday, May 14, and Wednesday, May 17, at 2:00 p.m. and 7:00 p.m. (local time) each day. The Fifth Element hit theaters on May 7, 1997, so this is technically happening a week after the film’s 20th anniversary. Here’s more:
As an added bonus, the theatrical presentation will also offer audiences a brand-new, exclusive look at Besson’s upcoming film, “Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets,” which opens in theaters nationwide July 21, 2017. This new film stars Dane DeHaan and Cara Delevingne as special operatives who must protect the astonishing city of Alpha from a marauding menace that threatens not just the city but the future of the universe. Besson both directed and wrote “Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets,” as he did the enormously influential “The Fifth Element.”
Tickets to The Fifth Element 20th Anniversary screenings can be purchased online at www.FathomEvents.com or at participating theater box offices. Over 400 theaters nationwide will be hosting the screenings. Following its two-day-only theatrical presentation, The Fifth Element will debut on home video in 4K Ultra HD on July 11, 2017.
I have been looking for a reason to revisit The Fifth Element, and this might be the perfect opportunity. It’s brilliant marketing to pair it with a preview of Valerian, too.
From its opening scenes in 1914 Egypt to its towering views of 23rd Century New York City, and its mind-expanding journey to the faraway world of Fhloston Paradise, “The Fifth Element” follows cab driver Korben Dallas (Bruce Willis) as he discovers that the fate of the world is contained within the mysterious Leeloo (Milla Jovovich), who literally drops from the sky and into his life. To save humanity, he must protect her from the evil industrialist Zorg (Gary Oldman), who is embroiled in an intergalactic war between the Mondoshawans and the Mangalores.
The spectacular odyssey across space and time also stars Ian Holm as the mysterious Vito Cornelius, Chris Tucker as hyperactive radio host Ruby Rhod, and Luke Perry as Billy Masterson. Conceived and written by Besson when he was just 16, “The Fifth Element” became a passion project and took more than 20 years to bring to the screen. “The Fifth Element” was nominated for eight César Awards, France’s top cinematic honor, and received three awards, including Best Director, Best Cinematography and Best Production Design.
When the dear departed cat got busted for doing something she knew we didn't want to her to do, she would run into the other room, wait ten seconds, and come strolling back. "Oh, no," she would say, "I'm the GOOD cat. That was the BAD cat that did that. But we look the same, so I'm not surprised you got confused." Cats invented gaslighting, and humans just picked it up from them.
Before just now you probably didn’t know you needed pictures of dogs looking like old Russian ladies. That’s okay. We all have blind spots. [via sadanduseless]
Just once, I want the hero to go “your wife/sister/mother/whatever would not have wanted this!”, and the villain to go, “actually, we talked about this a lot. She was really into vigilante justice and eye for an eye stuff. She always said, if something like this happens, avenge me.”
“Your mother never would have wanted this!”
“Wow you clearly never met my mother.”
“What? I just met your mother and she BEGGED me to stop you.”
“Oh, you must be talking about my other mother. They’re divorced.”
I feel like it’s really easy to lean towards categorising Sophie as the mom friend but like, no. no Sophie is the Cool aunt who’s always slightly tipsy and whisks you away for impromptu shopping trips and lets you drink but Eliot, Eliot is the mom friend.
You know, when you have to hide that you're lying by claiming you're incompetent, maybe we should be reconsidering your employment with us.
Jared Kushner, the slimy little weasel currently embroiled in a dudefight with the porcine and inflamed Stephen Bannon, reportedly withheld dozens of meetings and contacts with Russian officials when he applied for the top-secret security clearance that he so greatly desires.
what a fucking joke. entire teams work on these ads, huge fucking teams working for multi million dollar ads, and you still can’t work out that blatant racism is just gonna get you called out?
There are so many problems with Donald Trump’s sudden decision to launch airstrikes on Syria. But Democratic Rep. Seth Moulton gets right to the heart of how dishonest Trump’s claimed outrage over the gassing of Syrians is:
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So @POTUS cares enough about the Syrian people to launch 50 Tomahawks but not enough to let the victims of Assad find refuge & freedom here.
