Shared posts

07 Apr 17:11

John Wick (HD Rental) $1

by nicpad
Ryan Mustard

This is one of those action for no reason revenge movies... a guilty pleasure. But it does it well. Very enjoyable. Especially for $1.

John Wick (HD Rental)  $1

Thumb Score: +159
Amazon Instant Video via Amazon has John Wick (HD Rental) for $0.99. Thanks nicpad

Note, upon renting this movie, you have 30 days to complete watching this 24 hours rental. If you choose to 'Watch Now', you will start instantly streaming the video on your computer and you may later stream it on another compatible device.

Deal Editor's Notes & Price Research: If you're in the mood for some fight scenes or gun battles, this is definitely worth considering - Discombobulated

Brief Movie Synopsis: John Wick, an ex-hitman lost everything after his wife passed away. He's coming out to track down the gangsters that took everything from him...
06 Apr 16:52

AT&T’s plan to watch your Web browsing—and what you can do about it

by Jon Brodkin
Ryan Mustard

Just important to know what's going on with internet providers and their ability to look at your traffic.

If you have AT&T’s gigabit Internet service and wonder why it seems so affordable, here's the reason—AT&T is boosting profits by rerouting all your Web browsing to an in-house traffic scanning platform, analyzing your Internet habits, then using the results to deliver personalized ads to the websites you visit, e-mail to your inbox, and junk mail to your front door.

In a few select areas including Austin, Texas, and Kansas City, Missouri—places where AT&T competes against the $70-per-month Google Fiber—Ma Bell offers its own $70-per-month "GigaPower" fiber-to-the-home Internet access. But signing up for the deal also opts customers in to AT&T’s “Internet Preferences” program, which gives the company permission to examine each customer’s Web traffic in exchange for a price that matches Google's.

AT&T charges at least another $29 a month ($99 total) to provide standalone Internet service that doesn’t perform this extra scanning of your Web traffic. The privacy fee can balloon to more than $60 for bundles including TV or phone service. Certain modem rental and installation fees also apply only to service plans without Internet Preferences.

Read 67 remaining paragraphs | Comments

06 Apr 16:46

Amazon Dash Button

Ryan Mustard

I'm interested in this. Assuming they work well with your phone and all that, I would like this kind of thing.

I hope they extend this to their most popular products  
03 Apr 01:40

Today's Best Gaming Deals: Cheaper DualShock 4, XCOM Board Game, More

by Shep McAllister, Commerce Team
Ryan Mustard

XCOM board game for $40 on Amazon. I'll buy it if people are interested.

It never hurts to have a spare controller at the ready, and Newegg is selling DualShock 4s for $40 + $2 shipping today, which is about as low as they ever go. [ DualShock 4 Controller, $40]

Read more...








02 Apr 01:53

By the numbers: America’s favorite vehicles mapped

by Jonathan M. Gitlin
Ryan Mustard

Impressive dominance by the F-150

The automotive world is not a homogeneous one. Different regions have distinct opinions when it comes to the vehicles they’ll buy, and what works in Toledo might not make any sense on the streets of Turin or Tokyo. It’s a commonly accepted fact that Americans love big trucks and gas-hungry SUVs, but is that actually true?

Turns out, the answer is yes... unless you live in California. EveryCarListed.com has crunched the numbers, looking for the most popular vehicles per state, how much residents of a state spend on their cars on average, and so on. The Ford F-150 truck is the undeniable winner for the vast majority of the United States, being the most popular vehicle in 39 of the 50 states. They also compared overall truck versus car sales (without giving any information about the time period, but we’re going to assume it was for a single month, given the numbers) and found that truck sales edge out car sales, 8.7 million versus 7.7 million.

A few states do buck the trend. The aforementioned California favors the BMW 3-Series, and the Nissan Altima wins out in Florida, Nevada, New Jersey, and Delaware. Rhode Islanders adore their Mercedes-Benz C-Classes, Hawaii goes crazy for the Honda CR-V, Massachusetts is mad for the Honda Accord, and for reasons I don’t understand, Arizona is all about the Dodge Grand Caravan.

Read on Ars Technica | Comments

31 Mar 19:26

From The Wirecutter: The best cable modem (for most folks)

by Ars Staff
Ryan Mustard

If you're stuck with TWC and don't want to rent your cable modem every month.

This post was done in partnership with The Wirecutter, a list of the best technology to buy. Read the full article below at TheWirecutter.com.

After researching 57 different cable modems, the $90 ARRIS / Motorola SurfBoard SB6141 DOCSIS 3.0 remains the cable modem we recommend for most people. If instead of renting from your ISP, you buy your own cable modem, you can get a better device and recoup the cost in as little as a year—and then start saving anywhere from $6-$10 each month, depending on your ISP's rental fees.  Yes, you can probably find a slightly cheaper cable modem that only works with your ISP. We prefer our pick because its flexibility makes it a better long-term investment if you change service during the lifetime of the device. Unlike the competition, the SurfBoard is compatible with almost all of the fastest Internet plans from seven of the eight biggest cable Internet providers, including Charter, Comcast, and Time Warner Cable. You can move almost wherever you want and be assured that this buy-once, use-for-awhile device will still work. And you get the flexibility to switch providers if there's a better deal in your area.

Read 16 remaining paragraphs | Comments

26 Mar 19:16

How to Digitally Sign a PDF Using Preview on Mac [Mac Blog]

by Joe Rossignol
Ryan Mustard

Useful.

When you receive a PDF document by email that you must sign, the process of printing out the file, signing on the dotted line with a pen, scanning the signed document and sending it back can be a rather tedious task. Fortunately, Apple introduced the ability to digitally sign a PDF document using Preview, a program that comes preinstalled on every Mac, on OS X Lion or later.

MacRumors PDF Signature
The steps involved to digitally sign a PDF using Preview on Mac are quite simple and will save you valuable time, especially if you have multiple documents, contracts, forms or other paperwork to sign. If you are worried that your digital signature will look bad, rest assured that you can create your signature by using the trackpad or holding up your signature on paper to a Mac's built-in iSight camera.

Steps to Digitally Sign a PDF Using Trackpad


  1. Open the PDF file you need to sign in Preview.

  2. Click on the toolbox icon (Screen Shot 2015-03-26 at 1.28.36 PM) and then the signature (Screen Shot 2015-03-26 at 1.28.51 PM) icon.

  3. Click on Create Signature > Click Here to Begin. Draw your signature on the trackpad. Click any key when finished. Click Done.

  4. Click on the signature created to insert it into the PDF document. The signature can be moved or resized like a regular image.

Steps to Digitally Sign a PDF Using Camera


  1. Open the PDF file you need to sign in Preview.

  2. Click on the toolbox icon (Screen Shot 2015-03-26 at 1.28.36 PM) and then the signature (Screen Shot 2015-03-26 at 1.28.51 PM) icon.

  3. Click on Create Signature > Camera. Sign your name on white paper and hold it to be visible to the camera. Preview will draw a digital signature. Click Done.

  4. Click on the signature created to insert it into the PDF document. The signature can be moved or resized like a regular image.

Tips


  • If you are using the trackpad to create your digital signature, it is recommended that you look at Preview and go slow and steady with your finger to achieve the best result. For an even more precise signature, you can use an iPhone or iPad stylus, preferably one with a fine-tipped ending, to draw your signature on the trackpad.

  • Signing a piece of white paper and holding it up to the camera is the easiest way of creating a digital signature in Preview, although this method does not always yield the best results. The signature will appear inverted when you hold it up to your Mac's camera, but Preview will automatically ensure that it reads properly from left to right.

  • You can create a digital signature in Preview by following steps above even if you do not have a PDF document opened. By default, all digital signatures that you create are automatically stored in a list on Preview so that you can insert them into future PDFs documents and other files without needing to repeat these steps. Preview can store multiple signatures at once.

  • Apple also provides a markup tool in the Mail app on OS X Yosemite to create digital signatures that can be directly inserted into emails.






  • 26 Mar 15:54

    Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Clichés by Teddy Wayne

    Clichés are clichés for a reason: the Cliché Development Committee has convened at its annual convention and, after a new expression or idea has been brought up by a licensed nominator, voted with a two-thirds majority (or overridden a veto by the president of the CDC with a three-fourths majority) to designate it as an official cliché, regardless of whatever grains of truth it does or does not contain.

    25 Mar 22:25

    Ready for a Ready Player One movie from Steven Spielberg?

    by Patrick Klepek

    Ready for a Ready Player One movie from Steven Spielberg? Deadline reports the Jaws and E.T. director will helm the dystopian book about people jacked into a VR world.

    Read more...








    25 Mar 22:25

    Feminist Ben & Jerry's flavors

    by Jason Kottke
    Ryan Mustard

    Venus and Serena Vanilliams is pretty good.

    From Amanda McCall, a selection of Ben & Jerry's flavors featuring women.

    Feminist Ben Jerry

    Feminist Ben Jerry

    Feminist Ben Jerry

    Feminist Ben Jerry

    McCall made these because Ben & Jerry's hasn't done such a good job highlighting women with their products:

    Over the past three decades, Ben & Jerry's has created over twenty flavors honoring various famous people, and only two of those people have been female: Tiny Fey's character on 30 Rock ("Liz Lemon's Greek Frozen Yogurt", released in 2013 ) and Olympic snowboarder Hannah Teter ("Hannah Teter's Maple Blondie", released briefly in 2009).

    There are currently no female flavors of Ben & Jerry's ice cream (even Tina Fey would agree that, while "Greek frozen yogurt" is certainly a healthy ice cream alternative, it is not the same as ice cream), despite the fact that women consume significantly more ice cream than men do.

    The best thing about the Butter Pecancé Knowles flavor is that butter pecan ice cream is actually the singer's favorite flavor.

    "I love my butter pecan ice cream," she says, "but I also love to work out. We all have our issues. Mine is arms and legs, keeping them tight and toned. It takes work, believe me."

    Ben & Jerry's! Let's make this happen! (via @amateurgourmet)

    Tags: Amanda McCall   Ben and Jerry's   Beyonce   feminism   food   ice cream
    24 Mar 19:12

    Dalek relaxation video

    by Jason Kottke

    It's been a hectic week and now that it's Friday, let's all chill with this relaxation video narrated by a Dalek.

    Exhale. EXHALE! EX!!!-HALE!!! Ps. Make your voice sound like a Dalek. (via digg)

    Tags: Doctor Who   video
    23 Mar 17:52

    Because these are the breaks

    by Jason Kottke
    Ryan Mustard

    That first photo is incredible.

    I am a total sucker for great wave photography. Like these photos from Ray Collins.

    Ray Collins

    Ray Collins

    Ray Collins

    Prints are available of Collins' photos and many of them have been collected into a coffee table book called Found at Sea. (via @naveen)

    Tags: photography   Ray Collins
    23 Mar 15:16

    Rick Barnes' Future At Texas: Is It Time To Make A Change?

    by Peter Bean
    Ryan Mustard

    This article is super long and I didn't read it all, but with all respect to Barnes, I would be excited for a new basketball coach

    The past 17 seasons of Texas basketball have been the best in the program's history, but following a season of disappointment, the end of an era may be upon us.

    I love college basketball, and UT hoops in particular. Like, as much as most diehard orangebloods love Texas' football team. I've never slept in a line just to get tickets for a UT basketball game... but that's because it's never been necessary.

    I owe my hyper-fandom to my father, a shooting guard with a devastating jumper good enough to play small college ball at Oberlin College in Ohio and stories for days about playing pick up games with Chuck Daly while getting his PhD at Duke. My memorabilia collection includes rings from Texas' 1986 Southwest Conference championship in basketball and 1988 national title in swimming, both of which my Dad received as a member of UT's Athletics Council during the late 1980s. Indeed, he served on the committee that wound up hiring Tom Penders to replace Bob Weltlich as the head basketball coach.

    I lived and died with BMW on their run at the Final Four. Standing in the Alamodome watching TJ Ford & Friends cut down the nets was as special and surreal a moment in my sports fan life as singing the Eyes of Texas in the Rose Bowl with 50,000 other Longhorns fans after 41-38. I lost my mind when Paulino's three sailed through the rim to send us to the Elite Eight, and I was frighteningly bitter when Glenn Davis's three-pointer effectively ended our season in overtime two days later.

    So... you're saying that you enjoyed UT basketball's best moments? Didn't we all, PB?

    Fair enough. Let me add a little depth, then. I followed Turkish basketball for a considerable period of time, simply because I couldn't let go of PJ Tucker.1 I once called a BON reader a "weeping vagina" for his whiny, nonsensical comments about Barnes. I barely breathed watching Texas' quarterfinal match up against Iowa State in 2011, when the team needed a win to get into the NCAA Tournament. And I exchange more emails with coaches, scouts, and other observers across the state than I do members of my own family.

    For the record, I'm not proud of that last one, but it hammers home the point: I am deeply invested in Texas Longhorns basketball. Over-invested, if we're being honest. I'm one of those Longhorn blasphemers who openly declares a love for UT basketball equal to that for Longhorns football.

    So whatever else you might say about me and my views, understand that my opinions are those of a hyper-invested diehard who cares far too much about the success of the program than is justifiable for a creature with a finite window of existence. When my day comes and I'm looking back at my life from my death bed, the odds are I'll regret how much time and energy I devoted to Texas basketball.2

    In other words, I've given this a lot of thought. And the opinions I've held -- those reached in previous years, as well as the one I'm offering today -- have never been motivated by any protectionist sympathies for Rick Barnes.3 I want what's best for the Texas basketball program -- period, full stop. And although I think the decision is not nearly as clear cut as many would like to believe, following Texas' 54-48 defeat to Butler in the first round of the NCAA Tournament, capping what was ultimately a disappointing season relative to expectations, I count myself among those who would support Patterson were he to make a change.4

    Let's take a few minutes to look at how we got here -- what Barnes has done well, and where he's fallen short, and how both inform the direction Texas should go.

    I. From Penders to Contenders

    I enjoyed the Tom Penders era, which may not have had national championship upside but was fundamentally interesting and entertaining -- Penders' team earned the "Runnin' Horns" moniker right away, as UT's scoring average exploded to 94 points per game during Penders' first season, a full 24 points higher than the 70 the Horns averaged in Weltlich's final season.

    I have a lot of fond memories from the Penders era.  I recall being mesmerized by the offensive wizadry of some of the freaks Penders brought to Austin -- guys like Travis Mays, Terrence Rencher, and Reggie Freeman. The Penders era taught me how satisfying it can be to watch a freshman develop over four years from observing Sheldon Quarles (or "Q-Tip," as my father and I affectionately referred to him) transform from a painfully awkward skinny freshman to a solid two-way contributor as a senior.  I also credit Penders -- with an assist from Strollin' Nolan Richardson -- with teaching me how to properly engage a hated rival. Penders was also charismatic and interesting, and to this day I remain in awe of his mastery of the art of deflection -- only Tom Penders could convince you following a December home loss to Long Beach State that the Longhorns had just fallen to a team that was going to prove to be a darkhorse Final Four contender.5

    The Penders era was fun... until it wasn't, and following the Luke Axtell fiasco that capped a disappointing season overall, UT Athletics Director Deloss Dodds had no choice but to make a change. Right about the same time Dodds plucked Mack Brown from North Carolina to take over the football program, he reached into South Carolina to grab Clemson's Rick Barnes to be the Longhorns' new head basketball coach.

    II. The Transformation of Texas Basketball

    Texas' move to the Big 12 in 1996 presented an opportunity for the basketball program to elevate its stature. And Rick Barnes quickly proved he was up to the task.

    Not unlike the drastic change on offense that accompanied Penders' arrival in Austin, with Barnes UT experienced a similarly drastic makeover on the defensive end, where for all their offensive brilliance the Longhorns had been in a decade-long hibernation. Perhaps most importantly, however, Barnes began to fulfill on the program's promise as a destination for the talent-rich state's elite players.

    Barnes got off to a great start, immediately demonstrating his knack for coaching up a moderately talented roster, rallying his inaugural Longhorns squad from a 4-8 record earned during the non-conference season to a 13-3 run through Big 12 play that earned UT a shocking conference championship and a return to the NCAA Tournament, where they received a No. 7 seed. The following season, Barnes nearly repeated the accomplishment, guiding a still-thin roster to another 13-3 conference record that was second only to the loaded Iowa State team led by Marcus Fizer and Jamaal Tinsley, as well as another invite to the NCAA Tournament, this time as a No. 5 seed.

    Barnes' third season was an interesting one in several respects. In terms of results, the 2000-01 closely mirrored the previous two seasons, as Texas posted a 25-9 overall record, went 12-4 in the Big 12, and earned another mid-range seed in the NCAA Tournament (No. 6). Like Barnes' first Texas team that as a No. 7 seed fell to 10th-seeded Purdue, the 2000-01 Horns were eliminated in the opening round by a higher seed, falling to John Chaney's 11th-seeded Temple Owls.

    Texas Longhorns Basketball under Rick Barnes, 1999-2001

    Click to enlarge.

    Although not documented in the table above, it's worth noting that each of Barnes' first three teams finished the season on a surge: heading into the NCAA Tournament, the 1998-99 squad had won 10 of its last 13 games, the 99-00 group finished with 9 wins in its final 11 games, and the 00-01 squad was on an eight-game winning streak before losing in the Big 12 Tournament championship game to Oklahoma.  Also worth noting is the fact that the Longhorns won a conference title and posted the best conference record of any Big 12 team, its 38-10 mark better by a full four games than the next-best performances held by Kansas and OU. Notwithstanding that regular season success, Barnes' first three teams were unable to win a Big 12 Tournament Championship, twice exiting in the semifinals and once in the championship game.

    The one-and-done NCAA Tournament appearance was disappointing, but once the sting from a season-ending loss ran its course, the Longhorns fan base was buzzing with anticipation for the season ahead. The future of Texas basketball may never have looked brighter than it did heading into the 2001-02 season. Although the Horns were losing leading scorer Maurice Evans to the NBA, Chris Owens along with all four members of Barnes' solid 2000 recruiting class -- Royal Ivey, James Thomas, Brandon Mouton, and Brian Boddicker -- were returning, and they would be joined by Barnes' first high elite recruit: a five-star point guard out of Houston named TJ Ford.

    III. The Golden Years

    Ford's arrival marked the beginning of a nearly eight year stretch that represented the Golden Years of Texas Basketball. With his infectious smile and goofy-looking dreadlocks, Ford led the Horns to the Sweet 16 in his freshman, then created Texas-sized expectations for 2003-04 by announcing he'd return for his sophomore season. He led Texas to its second consecutive Sweet 16, then won two more to deliver Texas its first-ever trip to the Final Four.

    During the seven-year period constituting the Golden Years, Barnes led Texas to the Sweet 16 a full five times, with three trips to the Elite Eight. Along with Ford's Final Four team, year two of the Aldridge-Gibson class and year two of the Durant-Augustin class (without KD, who'd left for the NBA) won three NCAA Tournament games to make the Regional Final. At the conclusion of the 2007-08 season, Texas basketball had completed a seven-year stretch bested by only four or five schools in the entire country, with an average season record of 26-9, 12-4 in the Big 12, and an average NCAA seed of 3.7.

    Somewhat oddly, by the time Memphis -- one of the best teams in the 21st century -- dispatched Texas in the 2008 South Regional Final, Barnes had been tagged as a lousy coach and NCAA Tournament failure. Including enough Longhorns fans that I wondered if I was blogging about Kansas basketball instead of Texas. Barnes' performance record during the Golden Years tell a different story than the caricature he was often portrayed as:

    Texas Basketball 2001-07 Under Rick Barnes

    Click to enlarge.

    The only thing you could arguably call a 'blemish' on the seven-season stretch Barnes completed in 2007-08 was Texas' so-so performance in the Big 12 Tournament. Considering that conference tournaments basically don't matter, it's difficult to see what Barnes' critics were so upset about. Nearly 26 wins per season, two conference titles, a consistently high NCAA Tournament seed, and better-than-average performance in the NCAA Tournament relative to seed.

    Wait, what? Are you suggesting that Barnes' reputation as an NCAA Tournament choker wasn't deserved?

    Well, yeah. We'll get to Barnes' subsequent slump, when the evaluation gets a lot murkier, but I think it's worth taking a moment to look at Barnes' performance during the peak Golden Years, when he was still being caricatured as a flop.

    The table below charts Texas' performance in the seven NCAA Tournaments between 2002-08, listing for each season UT's seed, the number of expected wins for teams with that seed,6 and the Longhorns' actual number of wins in that NCAA Tournament.

    Rick Barnes Performance Against Seed Expectations (PASE) Table, 2002-08

    The data in this table gives us three important data points. First of all, during the seven-year period being examined, Barnes' Texas teams played well enough in the regular season to earn, on average, between a No. 3 and a No. 4 seed. Related to the first point, the data shows that Texas' success during this period was consistent: the Horns were a No. 6 seed in 2001, the season before TJ Ford arrived, and a No. 8 seed in 2005, the season Lamarcus Aldridge was lost to injury, and in the other five seasons were a No. 4 seed or better.

    The data also tell us that Rick Barnes' teams were not underperforming relative to their seed.  Based on UT's seeding during these seven years, Barnes' teams were expected to win 13.46 games. In actuality, they won 15, underperforming relative to seed expectation just once, in 2007, when Durant and Co. drew a terrible match up in the second round with USC, a big and physical team built to punish UT's light frontcourt. In each of the other six seasons, Barnes at least met or exceeded the expected performance for his team's seed.

    Barnes' performance during the Golden Years wasn't the second coming of Tom Izzo or anything, but it was plainly, irrefutably above average: the number of NCAA Tournament games won by Texas during the Golden Years (15 wins) exceeded the average number of wins for its seeds (13.46).

    Looking for some context for those numbers? Look up, to the top of the conference and the head coach who's won at least a share of the past 11 regular season Big 12 titles: Bill Self. No one comes anywhere close to insinuating Bill Self is anything less than a great coach -- nor should they. Self is fantastic, and obviously so. His teams have owned one of the premier conferences in the country for more than a decade, and he's won a national title...

    ...which is not to say that his teams have been lights out in the NCAA Tournament. Actually, they've been, well, pretty average. The tables below chart KU's Performance Against Seed Expectation (PASE) under Bill Self between 2004-15, with data for all seasons listed in the left table and -- for convenient comparison -- data for his peak seven seasons (2007-13) listed on the right.

    Kansas NCAA Tournament Performance Against Seed Expectation Under Bill Self (2004-15)

    Taking into account all 12 of KU's seasons under Self, his Jayhawks have been, on average, a No. 2 seed, expected to win 28 games. In actuality, they've won 27, giving Self a PASE of 0.96 for his KU tenure (27 wins / 27.98 expected wins = 0.96 PASE). Limiting our look to the best seven-year span during Self's tenure (2007-13), Self's KU teams performed a little bit better: with an average seed of 1.4 and 20 expected wins, they won 22, giving Self a PASE of 1.11 over that seven-year span (22 wins / 20 expected wins = 1.11 PASE).

    Rick Barnes' PASE during the Golden Years? Texas was expected to win 13.46 games, but actually won 15, giving Barnes a PASE of... wait for it... 1.15. Or to put his performance in additional context, consider that following the 2008 NCAA Tournament, Texas was one of just five schools to advance to the Sweet 16 in five of the previous seven seasons, joined by programs with head coaches that no one was calling a flop: Duke, Kansas, Michigan State, Wisconsin, and Gonzaga.

    Had Barnes been able to maintain the level of performance he established during the Golden Years, the only point to discussing all this would be to illustrate how unfair the criticisms of him were.

    But of course he hasn't been able to maintain that level of performance. Not even close.

    IV. The Seven-Year Slump

    One important consequence of Barnes' success at Texas across the seven-year period that represented the Golden Years of Texas basketball was that it created heightened expectations. When you start winning consistently at the highest level, fans understandably adjust their expectations upwards to meet it. And that's a big reason why Barnes' job is on the line today.

    In the seven years since DJ Augustin's 2008 run to the Elite Eight, the Longhorns have been far less successful than they were during the Golden Years, in both the regular season and NCAA Tournament.

    Texas Basketball Performance Between 2009-15 Under RIck Barnes

    Texas has fallen sharply from the elite levels Barnes' teams established between 2002-08. Over the past seven seasons, Texas has won just 64% of its contests overall (down from 74% during the Golden Years) and has been only slightly better than a coin flip in Big 12 play (winning 55% of its conference games, down from 73% during the Golden Years). The dip is reflected in UT's final ratings in both KenPom (No. 33, down from No. 18) and the SRS (No. 25, down from No. 15), where the Horns have dipped down to No. 33 and No. 25, respectively, after rating No. 18 and No. 15 across the Golden Years.

    Barnes missed the NCAA Tournament entirely following the disastrous 2012-13 campaign, and the average seed in the six NCAA Tournaments his teams have played in between 2009-15 has been 8.0, more than 4 lines worse than the 3.7 it averaged between 2002-08. Even with fewer wins expected based on those seeds, the Longhorns' performance has been below average, winning just three Tournament games where 4.93 are expected.

    Stepping away from the pure metrics to a more subjective evaluation, I would characterize just two of the past seven seasons as successful. Though he doesn't get much credit for it because of its bitter ending, the job Barnes did assembling and developing the 2010-11 squad was in my mind one of the best coaching jobs of his 17-year Texas career. Likewise, I was very impressed with the job Barnes did guiding last year's group to a 3rd place finish in the Big 12 and No. 7 seed in the NCAA Tournament. Both teams were hosed by the NCAA Tournament committee, and especially the 2010-11 team, which should have been a No. 2 or No. 3 seed but wound up a No. 4 playing out west against an outstanding and also underrated No. 5 seed, Arizona. Throw in an official who can't count to five, and you have an all-time NCAA Tournament hose job.

    Notwithstanding the relatively disappointing conclusions to the 2011 and 2014 seasons, I think it's fair to say that both highlighted Barnes' strengths as a coach and were reflective of the reasons a program should value having him as a head coach. Whether or not it's time for Barnes and Texas to part ways, to say that he's washed up as a coach would go too far. If he's done at Texas and still wants to coach, he'd be a strong hire for a long list of programs -- even at his age (62 years old).

    So will he be available?  Though the minds of many fans are firmly made up, from where I'm sitting the decision for Steve Patterson isn't as clear cut as many make it out to be.

    V. The End of an Era?

    Like it or not, there are good reasons to favor retaining Barnes another season. If Patterson is 50-50 on whether or not to make a change, the deciding factor could well be the desires of the returning roster of players -- including the incoming class of freshmen. Even if Myles Turner turns pro, as seems likely, Texas will have a strong roster with Top 10 potential. If a roster with at least the potential to make a Final Four run is the cost of making a change, can you really let Barnes go? It's not like he's never taken a team there before...

    Some of you won't see this as a difficult decision at all, but I suspect Patterson will find this to be a very tough call. Indeed, looking at the long-term horizon, the most prudent course of action may well be to give Barnes one more shot with his current crop of players -- particularly if (a) the current roster would be compromised by a change and (b) there is no clear-cut replacement candidate who we know would accept our offer. Both factors are critically important to Patterson's decision, even if he's otherwise a lean towards making a change.

    Even if the returning roster would suffer no negative impact from a coaching change, the necessity of identifying -- and signing -- an outstanding replacement is a necessary component of any decision to make a change. If you can't get the right guy to step in for the 2015-16 season, there is absolutely no harm in waiting to make a run at the right replacement for 2016-17, while giving a coach with three Elite Eights and a Final Four on his resume one more shot with the talented roster he's assembled.

    Those are the reasons we could very plausibly see Rick Barnes on the sidelines come November, and I'll be honest, I wouldn't be nearly as upset as most will be. That being said, should Patterson opt to make a change, I've reached the point where I'd support the move.

    There are two reasons I'd support a decision to make a change. The first and less important of the two, is that Barnes has lost the fan base. Now, to be fair, at least in my view a non-trivial amount of the ill will towards Barnes is... misguided, shall we say. Listening to some Texas fans complain about Barnes, it's difficult not to conclude that they don't watch much college basketball, because a lot of the complaints are of deficiencies that are not a product of Texas' head coach but of college basketball players, generally.  Developed back-to-the-basket skills are an aspiration for 24-year-old NBA players; the players who possess those skills while in college are few and far between. Replacing Rick Barnes will not change this.

    Barnes also suffers from an astonishing number of what I would characterize as illegitimate criticisms. For example, I routinely hear fans grumble about Barnes' inability to draw up in-bounds plays. This strikes me as akin to dismissing John Daly as a quality golfer because he's short off the tee. Really? With all the legitimate weaknesses readily available for a critic to latch on to, that is what's bothering you? Are we watching the same person?

    All that being said, even if fans didn't have good reasons for giving up on Barnes, what would matter is the fact that they'd given up. And in actuality, Texas fans do have good reasons for feeling like their relationship with Texas basketball under Barnes has emotionally flatlined, and it seems clear that a decisive majority favor making a change --that a decisive majority do not believe Rick Barnes capable of leading Texas back to the Final Four. That alone could be enough to make Rick Barnes' seat too hot, irrespective of anything else.

    There are reasons for retaining Barnes and reasons for making a change, but at the end of the day, there was one decisive reason that this season cost Barnes my vote of confidence. In addressing Barnes on this blog, I have said numerous times that while many of the criticisms that animate others in the fan base don't do as much to move me in favor of replacing him, the one big concern I had that could undermine my support was a failure to optimize a roster primed for an elite season.

    There's no question that Barnes can excel with an underwhelming roster. Most of his most impressive coaching has been precisely this: coaching up a group with low expectations to a surprisingly good season. For that reason alone, if he's let go at Texas, Barnes will be a great hire for someone in need of that skill.

    However, in no small part thanks to the elevated expectations established by Barnes himself, that's not what Texas fans are shopping for right now. Right now, Texas fans -- myself included -- want a head coach whose recruiting and development not only results in a high floor, but also has a championship ceiling. Is that too ambitious a goal for a football-first school with little basketball history and pitiful fan support? It's perhaps a more difficult challenge than many fans realize, but it's not an unworthy aspiration. There's a real danger of it being counterproductive, but prudently pursued, it's both a reasonable and prudent place to set the bar. Sometimes you're stuck in Good, without a path forward to Great.

    Pivoting to the second, more decisive reason favoring a change, I've written a lot about talent cycles in college basketball and the need for (a) fans to evaluate coaches within the context of these cycles and (b) coaches to make the most of their peaks in the cycles. During the Golden Years, Barnes did a satisfactory job in this regard, making the Final Four in TJ Ford's sophomore season and the Elite Eight in the second seasons of Aldridge/Gibson in '06 and Augustin in '08. Given the disproportionate number of early NBA defections he was forced to navigate, the Golden Years were largely a success.

    The data points since then, however, have been very troubling. The collapse of the 2009-10 team after earning the program's first-ever No. 1 national ranking was devastating, and a huge red flag that Barnes struggled with optimizing a roster with Final Four potential. TJ Ford seemed to counteract Barnes' most problematic tendencies, but there was real concern that without an on-court leader to mitigate those tendencies, Barnes was prone to suffocate his own team.

    I personally wanted to see how Barnes managed another team hitting a peak in the talent cycle, an opportunity we wouldn't get again until this past season. There's no question the Horns partly suffered this season due to some rotten luck, but there's no question that this season represented a failure by Barnes to maximize this group's potential. Even with Taylor's injury, even competing in such a loaded Big 12, an 8-10 conference record, four losses on our home floor, and a sweaty Selection Sunday followed by a one-and-done exit is an unequivocal failure for this group of players.

    At the end of the day, that failure reinforces the one big concern I and many others had and have about Barnes: his ability to guide a talented team to its top-end potential. Barnes could earn passing marks in every other respect and it would all be undermined by failure in this one critical regard. I don't care that he had a throw-away year in 2012-13 that ended with no NCAA Tournament bid -- that happens to everyone, including the best of the best. I don't care that sometimes an unexpected run of early departures to the pros means some rebuilding seasons without Final Four upside. What I do care about is that when the stars do align, Barnes is ready and able to capitalize on the opportunity.

    And that's where Barnes has lost this fan base. Even among those who appreciate all his strengths and are understanding of the ups-and-downs inherent to the sport, the support for Barnes is not unconditional. Indeed, if there is only one condition, that is it: be able to make the most of your best opportunities.

    This season, Rick Barnes and Texas had the best opportunity in six years to have a season that positioned us to contend for a run at the Final Four. Instead we battled with other teams to avoid playing among the First Four. The team too often looked tight -- like a team that was thinking too much instead of playing. We saw players handicapped by a tinge of hesitation, which is all it takes to have a devastating impact on performance. We saw a team that struggled with shot selection and was utterly crippled by turnovers.  We saw a group of players who struggled to get in sync with each other, and struggled to close out tight games. We saw a coach struggle to combat these problems, and it's not the first time.

    That, in the end, is what cost Barnes the support of the fan base, and may well cost him his job as the head coach at Texas.

    It's been a damn good run, but if there's no way to make a run at the top, it's time we parted ways.

    And with that, I hand this over to the gallery. Thanks for reading all these years, and I look forward to hearing your thoughts in the comments below. Are you ready to replace Barnes? Would you consider giving him one more year? And assuming you're ready to make the move now, who's your guy to bring in?

    Notes

    1 Penders was half right: one of the teams in the 49ers' December 1989 victory over Texas in Austin proved to be a darkhorse contender for the Final Four, but it wasn't Long Beach State, who wound up finishing 4th in the Big West and didn't make the Tourney. It was Texas, who snuck into the NCAA Tournament as a #10 seed after winning six straight down the stretch of the regular season before making an improbable run to the Midwest Regional Final, where they narrowly lost an all-time classic NCAA Tournament battle with Arkansas, the eventual national champs.

    2 I've always viewed Tucker as a basketball freak -- an exceptionally talented mutant-savant with Go-Go Gadget arms, butter-soft suction cups for hands, uncanny anticipation on defense, and off-the-charts natural basketball intelligence -- who because of his Tweener size (just 6'6" tall) was criminally underrated -- a view I'm glad to say has been validated by the success he's had since the Phoenix Suns decided to give him an extended second look a couple years ago. As of March 20th, Tucker has played in 65 of the Suns' 69 games on the season, including 50 games in the starting line up. He's averaging 8.9 points, 6.4 boards, and 1.3 steals per game on the season, which includes an astounding three games with 5 steals just since January 31st. And for my case in point, see this article about Tucker's critical role in the Suns' victory over James Harden and the Rockets this past Saturday night.

    3 For better or worse, I'm okay with this. Make of that what you will.

    4 Truth be told, I would advocate for Texas replacing my own father if I thought it was the best thing for the program to do. Barnes will land on his feet just fine if he's let go, and I'm not one of those who favors "legacy stays" for coaches whose past successes are not presently sustained.

    5 Those who think the decision is clear cut and have no use for a critical and nuanced analysis of the decision can stop here. We may disagree about whether Texas should have done this sooner, but that's water under the bridge. On the question of what Steve Patterson should do right now? We agree: it's time to retire the Rick Barnes era.

    6 See here for a more complete explanation of Performance Against Seed Expectations (PASE), including a chart of the number of expected wins for each seed.

    Poll
    Should Texas retain Rick Barnes?
    • Yes
    • No

      1492 votes | Results

    20 Mar 15:59

    Inner Vision for the weekend of March 13, 2015

    by Gregory Han
    Ryan Mustard

    This is great stuff.

    There aren't many major league baseball players who travel and live in a 1978 VW camper van. In fact, there's only one, and "Van Man" lives according to his father's lesson: "Play outdoors. Love the earth. Live simply. Use only what you need."

    The list of major league baseball players who travel and live in a 1978 VW camper van: one. “Van Man” lives according to his father’s lesson: “Play outdoors. Love the earth. Live simply. Use only what you need.”

    There’s a plenitude of sites (including our own) recommending and rating just about everything made by mankind. But as important as “what to buy” is knowing what’s possible using the products you’ve purchased. Inner Vision is a weekly digest connecting the dots between great everyday objects and the culture and techniques behind living well with them.

    Patrick Allen of Lifehacker outlines a system to help reduce or eliminate "clutter, impulse buys, and buyer's remorse".

    Patrick Allen of Lifehacker outlines a system to help reduce or eliminate “clutter, impulse buys, and buyer’s remorse”.

    The “Should I Buy This?” Test: Sure, the ideal is to live with less in a home unencumbered by clutter. Yet without identifying and changing purchasing habits, decluttering can be hopeless—the equivalent of scooping water out from a sinking boat using a Dixie cup. Stop the leak first by preventing yourself from “buying crap you don’t need” in the first place.

    The Importance of Lunch Breaks: Only one in five workers now steps away from their desk for lunch, which means a lot of us are accumulating crumbs inside our keyboard, sitting on our behinds for unhealthy stretches of time, and all the while snuffing the spark of creativity, according to Kimberly Elsbach, a professor specializing in workplace psychology at the University of California, Davis Graduate School of Management.

    The Science of Sleep: Everyone has their own technique and advice for getting through the day after foregoing sleep. Some turn to caffeine, some take small disco naps throughout the day, while others tinker with their Circadian rhythm using light therapy. According to sleep researchers, these are all effective techniques, but they work even better in combination.

    When properly stored, olive oil can be stored and used for months or even years. But it all depends on the packaging to stave off oxidation and the unwelcome rancid taste that comes along with it.

    When properly stored, olive oil can be kept for months or even years. But it all depends on the packaging to stave off oxidation and the unwelcome rancid taste that comes along with it.

    Don’t Spoil Your Virginity: Years ago I attended an olive oil tasting class at the University of California, Davis where I learned to recognize and appreciate the nuances of extra virgin olive oil (sipped, not dipped). Some tasted of fresh-cut grass, others so spicy I swore there was capsaicin infused in the oil, while some were even characterized by a flavor/scent profile with the nose-crinkling descriptor of “barnyard.” What I didn’t realize was packaging itself can have a profound effect on the quality and taste of extra virgin olive oil before and after you open up a bottle or can of olio extravergine di oliva.

    Not the Best: I doubt the average Wirecutter/Sweethome reader is apt to purchase a mobile device anyone would deem a “shitphone.” Nonetheless, I’d also wager most will still find amusement and interest in The Awl’s John Herman diving headfirst into the world of living with off-brand electronics, where cutting-edge features are dulled down to somewhere between barely or fairly usable, and the veneer of branding disintegrates away one stuttered swipe at a time.

    Stop Feeling Knotty: A few weeks ago I experienced a most humbling condition. I pulled a back muscle after violently coughing while seated. The severity of the cough combined with the angle of my posture resulted in teary-eyed swearing and the desire to knead my back muscle into submission. This illustrated guide helped me self-administer some relief (remember: roll along, not over the knot).

    In the habit of hanging your suit from the back of chair? Tsk, tsk...you're ruining the shape of the shoulders.

    In the habit of hanging your suit from the back of chair? Tsk, tsk, you’re ruining the shape of the shoulders.

    The Five Fundamentals of Suit Care: The sartorialists over at Mr. Porter obviously think we’re made of money, advising purchasing a suit for every day of the week. Subtract that one pricey bit of advice and the rest of their tips for cleaning and storing a suit are spot-on, requiring only a modest investment in a good iron, a lint brush, wooden hangers, and a garment bag to keep your best duds tip-top.

    Vodka & Charcoal: Food and travel photographer Dylan Ho seeks adventure by fork, chopsticks, skewer, and occasionally his bare hands. Ho admits the gustatory delights of foreign cuisines can bring with them the danger of sad trombone stomach (which can sound disturbingly like a tuba or a nightmarish bebop session, depending on the offending meal and constitution of the sufferer). The experienced eater shares three of his go-to food poisoning remedies to soothe and relieve a case of eater’s remorse while adventuring abroad.

    Alright, Out of Sight!: Sugru, that magical malleable and flexible glue substance, is to tech DIY repairs as duct tape was to MacGyver. But this is the first time we’ve seen Sugru being used to declutter the home, utilizing its adhesive qualities to slyly hang an array of accessories across the back of a flat panel display. If you’re going spend all that money on a television, you might as well get as much use out of it. (Via Lifehacker.)

    A single log cut four ways stuffed with kindling, and you've got a fire which will last for hours with hardly any tending.

    A single log cut four ways stuffed with kindling, and you’ve got a fire which will last for hours with hardly any tending.

    Flame On: The joys of  a campfire are multitude: the camaraderie of warmth, the illuminating golden light, the hypnotic dance between flames and shadows, and most importantly, s’mores. The only problem is campfires take constant tending, requiring additional logs be added throughout the night, with poking and prodding required to keep the flames ablaze. The Swedish Torch simplifies everything, a more-efficient single-log campfire that can double as a stovetop without the eye-watering smoke.

    Got an interesting story, link, resource, or how-to you think we should check out for consideration for our next issue of Inner Vision? Drop us a line with the subject “Inner Vision” and we’ll take a look!

    20 Mar 13:47

    Can movement tell a story? Sure, if you’re as gifted as Akira...

    Ryan Mustard

    There is a link to patreon in there if you feel like supporting this guys work.



    Can movement tell a story? Sure, if you’re as gifted as Akira Kurosawa. More than any other filmmaker, he had an innate understanding of movement and how to capture it onscreen. Join me today in studying the master, possibly the greatest composer of motion in film history.


    For educational purposes only. You can donate to support the channel at
    Patreon: http://www.patreon.com/everyframeapainting 


    And follow me here:
    Twitter: https://twitter.com/tonyszhou
    Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/everyframeapainting

    18 Mar 19:01

    Texas workout made comedian Kevin Hart throw up

    by Wescott Eberts
    Ryan Mustard

    Jimmy Kimmel speaks in such a slow boring manner.

    Not everyone can hang with a Longhorns workout.

    17 Mar 15:46

    Patrick Bateman business card iPhone case

    by Susannah Breslin

    If you've seen "American Psycho," you'll likely remember the scene where Patrick Bateman and his peers pull out their business cards like Old West gunfighters pulled out their firearms. Now you can have Bateman's card -- "That's bone. And the lettering is something called Silian Rail." -- in the form of an iPhone case.

    patrick-bateman-phone-case.jpg

    As for Silian Rail, according to IMDb:

    This is not a real font, the name was invented by Bret Easton Ellis for the novel. In the film, the actual font seen on the business card is Garamond Classico SC.

    You can watch the full scene here. (via The Cut)

    Tags: design   iPhone   phone cases
    13 Mar 20:46

    The Madness of Skyrim Mods, Captured In Three Minutes

    by Patricia Hernandez
    Ryan Mustard

    Pretty good, plus a tommy wiseau reference

    Watch as one man tries to see how far he can push Skyrim before everything crumbles into complete chaos.

    Read more...








    13 Mar 19:28

    The Many Faces of Rick Barnes

    by jc25
    Ryan Mustard

    Haha. Barnes always had kind of an undead vampire like visage in my opinion.

    He's half Rick, half Barnes, and not unentirely fascinating.

    Over at the SB Nation Mothership, Bill Hanstock took a very insightful and very comprehensive look at the phenomenon that is "Tom Crean Face". It's hard to pick a favorite, but the UNCOMFORTABLE gif speaks to me. Over and over again.

    Tom Crean Uncomfortable

    Now that the Texas Longhorns' Big 12 run is officially over and Rick Barnes faces the strong possibility of no longer coaching in a Burnt Orange tie, it's a nice time to take a retrospective through the many faces of Rick Barnes.

    ANGRY:

    ANGRIER:

    ANGRIEST:

    RESIGNED:

    RESIGNEDER:

    PRESS CONFERENCE ORNERY:

    PRESS CONFERENCE ORNERIER:

    PRESS CONFERENCE MILDLY AMUSED AND/OR HIGH ON LIFE:

    YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG:

    YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG:

    SERIOUSLY YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG:

    WHEN YOU DO IT WRONG YOU BUY YOURSELF A ONE-WAY TICKET TO BENCHLAND:

    YOU KNOW NOTHING, JON HOLMES:

    WHAT IS THIS I DON'T EVEN:

    THE KILLER IS BEHIND YOU:

    HERE IS THE CHURCH HERE IS THE STEEPLE F*CK THE PEOPLE:

    I GUESS YOU CAN DERE-LICK MY BALLS, CAP-E-TAN:

    THIS IS MY HAPPY FACE:

    I SHOULD HAVE NEVER SPENT THAT AFTERNOON WITH THE TEXTILES & APPAREL MAJORS:

    WELP:

    TO THE WINDOW TO THE WALL:

    BUY OUT LIFE:

    I DID IT BARNES WAY:

    13 Mar 19:24

    Photoshop experts using Photoshop 1.0

    by Jason Kottke
    Ryan Mustard

    This is great.

    Photoshop 1.0 came out in 1990 and didn't have layers, live preview, multiple levels of undo, or many other features. See some current Photoshop experts wax nostalgic and wrestle with the lack of features in this entertaining video.

    We've come a long way, baby.

    Tags: Photoshop   video
    13 Mar 13:19

    Titanfall 2 officially coming to PS4

    Ryan Mustard

    With cross platform multiplayer?

    13 Mar 01:37

    Cities: Skylines, As Told By Steam Reviews

    by Patricia Hernandez
    Ryan Mustard

    Pretty interested in this, but will likely never play a PC game anytime soon

    So, turns out Cities: Skylines is a pretty rad game . People like it so much, that the city-building sim is currently the top-selling game on Steam.

    Read more...








    12 Mar 19:23

    [Sponsor] Tuft & Needle

    by Daring Fireball Department of Commerce
    Ryan Mustard

    This was one of the brands recommended in an article that talked about how the mattress industry is a total rip off.

    One mattress, made perfect.

    Tuft & Needle provides a new way to shop for a mattress that is honest and hassle-free. The Tuft & Needle Mattress is #1 rated on Amazon with over 600 reviews. By cutting out the middlemen, gimmicks and sales tactics, Tuft & Needle offers an American-made mattress at a revolutionary price point. Starting at $350 with a 10-year warranty and ships free directly to your door.

    Get your risk-free 30 night trial today at tuftandneedle.com.

    11 Mar 20:12

    Far Cry 4's Yeti DLC Is Fun, Has Yetis

    by Kirk Hamilton

    Early in Valley of the Yetis, protagonist Ajay Ghale sees one of the mythical beasts for the first time. "What the fuck is that?" he asks. It's a yeti, Ajay. It's a yeti.

    Read more...








    11 Mar 17:56

    Proper Uses for the Emoticon 8==> in Business Email by Kevin Keller

    It’s your first week of work and you owe an update to a client. Here’s a common etiquette question: How should you use 8==>?

    The first and most obvious application is as a regular bullet point. Draw attention to your key points:

    8==> The shipment of parts will arrive Thursday, not tomorrow.

    8==> can also indicate “therefore.” Take note: Businesspeople do not parse dense paragraphs!

    The fifth floor printer is out of toner.
    8==> All printing requests should go to Peggy in finance.

    One real strength of 8==> is its ability to indicate size or quality. You can adjust the length of the shaft:

    Relative market sizes for potential Q3 expansion sites (total pop.):

    8==>Tucson, Arizona

    8===>San Diego, California

    8====>Houston, Texas

    Or the volume of dissemination:

    Focus group feedback, interior lining for sleeping bags:

    8==>~ Polyester

    8==>~~ Cotton

    8==>~~~ Silk

    Get creative. If something is urgent but hasn’t received the attention of your supervisor, inflate the ball sack:

    8==> Report to funders is due COB tomorrow.

    If a message is disappointing, illustrate it:

    8==>.. The BOD has announced a furlough of all part-time staff.

    Clarify workplace behavior:

    8==>O: Derek agrees with management about an accelerated Q1 launch.

    And indicate progress on project deliverables:

    8==>       {} Team has hit roadblocks but will meet next week’s deadline.

    8==>   {} Richard confirms prototype will be ready by EOD Thursday.

    8==>{} Janice has submitted final drafts of the stakeholder report.

    Finally, use it as a salutation:

    8==>’s,

    Please find attached the minutes from today’s meeting.

    There you go, young professionals. Be fearless.

    04 Mar 22:17

    Valve's Steam Machines Will Officially Launch In November

    by Jason Schreier

    "Steam Machines will start at the same price point as game consoles, with higher performance," Valve said in a press release today. Well, OK then.

    Read more...








    04 Mar 22:17

    Tropico 5 Hits PS4 April 24th

    Ryan Mustard

    Anybody ever played the tropico games? I've been kind of been into sim city, civilization type games again.

    03 Mar 16:09

    As the Token Female Member of This Action-Adventure Team, My Job is to Kick by Juliana Gray

    Ryan Mustard

    Pretty good. Also I learned the word stevedore.

    I wear black leather pants. I wear spike-heeled boots. When I kick, I pivot like a Goth ballerina and drive a heel into a villain’s face.

    But I’m also smart, probably some kind of scientist. Psychology. Genetics. My lab coat sweeps like a silk chemise across my thighs.

    Mostly I kick. I can throw a knife with pinpoint accuracy. I am a wizard at ziplines. I probably know how to drive a car, but my male team members always take the wheel, while I follow on a motorcycle, leaning low over the bars, my eyes focused, my ass taut and hovering just above the seat. I do not wear a helmet, and my hair streams behind me.

    I can pound shots of whiskey like a stevedore. I never eat.

    Really, my hair is impractically long for all of my action work, but somehow it never blows in my face. Strands of it never get stuck in my mouth. I’m just not an awkward, messy-haired, wobbly-in-heels, I’d-rather-put-on-my-yoga-pants-and-watch-Netflix kind of woman.

    I do not have a sense of humor, except for an extensive repertoire of one-liners about penis size.

    My male team members may have been skeptical of me at first, but I’ve earned their respect. I achieved this by fighting one of them. This fight ended with me pinning the man to the floor, straddling him, panting through my half-parted lips. And now? Total respect.

    Scissor kick. Scorpion kick. Whip kick. Butterfly twist kick. Spinning hook kick. Crescent kick. My axe kick is like a beheading sword. My tornado kick is the wrath of an angry god.

    There is some sexual tension between me and the handsome team leader, but we both know better than to cross that line. It would never work out between us; he’s too driven and haunted by the ghosts of his past. I’m an orphan who had to get tough fast to make my way in the world. Sometimes I catch him admiring the way my leather pants and top — is that a jacket? a bustier? — hug my curves, but we keep it professional.

    Maybe I’m a physicist. That would make sense, because my roundhouse kicks can only be the result of intensive, government-funded study. Seriously, I’m like a goddamn human gyroscope. A gyroscope that kicks you in the face.

    I can hot-wire a car. I’m a hacker. I can take a punch. When a trickle of blood runs fetchingly from the corner of my mouth, it matches my lipstick.

    There may come a time in our mission when I’m required to go undercover, infiltrate a formal charity ball or an evening at the opera. I will don a strapless taffeta gown — deep scarlet — encrusted with sparkling beads. A diamond and emerald pendant will drip into my cleavage. My team members will be stunned by my transformation; they’ve developed such a deep professional respect for me that they sometimes forget I am also a woman. Our team leader’s mouth will drop open ever so slightly as I descend a staircase. He will recover his composure with a compliment or joke, and we will be professionals again. When the time comes for me to kick, I will tear a slit in my form-fitted gown and let fly in designer heels.

    I almost never cry, but when I do — when I witness an act of cruelty towards a child, and my icy veneer briefly cracks — I weep only a single tear. I angrily dash it away, hoping my teammates haven’t noticed.

    But mostly I kick.

    01 Mar 17:34

    The Best Stupid Jokes About That Stupid Dress

    by Patricia Hernandez
    Ryan Mustard

    Ok, this is one of the freakiest things that has happened to me in recent memory. Link directly to the relevant article. http://gawker.com/what-color-is-this-goddamn-dress-1688330170

    Today the internet lost its collective mind, and so everyone finds themselves arguing about what color a dress is. Really.

    Read more...








    01 Mar 02:10

    Swatch Introduces Touch Zero One Smartwatch

    by John Gruber
    Ryan Mustard

    Finally! A beach volleyball focused watch and app!

    David Bredan, writing for A Blog to Watch:

    Today, as news both expected and unexpected, Swatch has introduced what will be its first widely available smartwatch: the Swatch Touch Zero One. What we all expected to see sooner or later — preferably sooner — was a smart / notification / fitness watch to be offered by one of the Swiss watch industry giants. The unexpected part, is that there’s a direct link to, there’s no other way to put it, beach volleyball.

    That’s quite a focused niche.