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10 Feb 19:20

did everyone know the real reason I was at an office party with a married couple?

by Ask a Manager

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager.

A reader writes:

This letter involves a very sensitive topic and some backstory, so bear with me.

Would you consider it weird if a coworker brought along an unrelated college-aged girl to a work party where you could invite family?

I ask because I was​ that college girl. When I was 19, I was a sexually frustrated lesbian with then-undiagnosed autism. Despite being at an LGBT-friendly university, I had no sex life and didn’t know how to approach women without coming across as some sort of creep. Every LGBT-related extracurricular I was in was centered on networking, political activism, or community, so I never felt comfortable broaching any romantic or sexual topics with fellow queer women, and I was also scared of accidentally hitting on straight women. HER and Lex didn’t exist then, and I was too scared to attach my face to an app like Tinder.

So I would make anonymous posts on YikYak and Whisper asking if there were any other lesbians in the area. I met a couple in their thirties who wanted a third, and I said yes because it was my only opportunity for gay sex even if a guy was there. (To be clear, the encounter itself was entirely consensual and, to quote Anatoly Dyatlov, “not great, not terrible.”)

However, before the actual encounter, the couple had invited me to their office party (they both worked there). The couple said that it was normal since “family and friends” were invited, and they had introduced me as their “cousin” to their coworkers. Of course, I didn’t tell people the real reason I was there, but I was honest about my university, my degree, etc. I was friendly with anyone who talked to me and didn’t think anything of it.

I’m now 28. I have established myself into my budding white-collar career. I recently remembered my previous escapade — upon which, it jarringly dawned onto me that all of the couple’s coworkers likely clocked me as their unicorn with me none the wiser. After attending quite a few office parties of my own where family was invited, it clicked in my mind how weird and noticeable it might be if a coworker brought an unrelated college student under the nebulous label of “cousin.” Who brings their cousin to an office party, anyway?

Thankfully, materially speaking, it doesn’t matter now. I work in a different industry than the couple. I moved to a different state after graduation. I currently live and work 1,800 miles from where we lived. We weren’t in regular contact after the encounter. I don’t remember their names and, heck, they likely don’t remember me at all! This satisfies my rational mind, but emotionally, I cannot shake off the likelihood that all of the couple’s coworkers knew the real reason I was there. With this in mind, I have no idea why the couple would’ve invited me along, because wouldn’t this have also reflected poorly on them from a professional standpoint?

It makes me feel weirdly vulnerable, gross, and exposed almost 10 years after the fact. I simultaneously feel stupid for ever agreeing to it but also frustrated because nobody taught me how to navigate the college social environment without accidentally acting gross or hiding my emotions entirely. Are my fears unfounded?

Yes.

The real question is: what married couple invites their hook-up to an office party ahead of a single casual sexual encounter?

That’s not a thing people do, largely because office parties are not exactly hotbeds of sexual arousal. To the contrary, going to someone else’s office party is normally the opposite of exciting foreplay; they tend to be incredibly dull for anyone who doesn’t work there (and often for those who do).

It is very, very odd that they thought they should bring you! But it’s odd on their side, not on yours. You just rolled with it; good for you. You were also not yet of an age where you knew anything about office parties and what would or wouldn’t be appropriate. But they were!

In any case, I am absolutely sure that their coworkers at the party didn’t suspect you were their unicorn! Bringing a cousin (who might have been staying with them) makes a ton more sense. It is highly, highly unlikely that any of their coworkers went home thinking, “I bet that wasn’t really a cousin and was actually a hook-up!” Because again, office parties ≠ hot romance. It’s just not where the mind would go.

I am sorry you are feeling vulnerable and exposed looking back on this! I hope it helps to hear that almost certainly none of their coworkers thought you were anything other than a bored cousin who had been dragged to someone else’s work function.

10 Feb 19:14

my interview with Weekend Edition about the attack on federal workers

by Ask a Manager

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager.

I was interviewed by NPR’s Weekend Edition yesterday about the Trump administration’s attack on federal workers. You can listen here or below:

10 Feb 19:14

Colombia President Claims Cocaine No Worse Than Whiskey

by The Onion Staff

Colombian President Gustavo Petro said during a government meeting that cocaine is “not worse than whiskey” and that it’s only illegal because it comes from Latin America. What do you think?

“Been telling my parole officer this for years.”

Debbie Omstead, Sandal Cobbler

“All I know is that they’re both less dangerous than half-off Mai Tais at hibachi happy hour.”

Alan Sayles, Clue Compiler

“While we’re ranking things, I’ve always thought Sprite was better than meth.”

Dennis Pardo, Tax Evader

The post Colombia President Claims Cocaine No Worse Than Whiskey appeared first on The Onion.

10 Feb 19:13

In Breaking USAID, the Trump Administration May Have Broken the Law

by by Anna Maria Barry-Jester and Brett Murphy

by Anna Maria Barry-Jester and Brett Murphy

ProPublica is a nonprofit newsroom that investigates abuses of power. Sign up to receive our biggest stories as soon as they’re published.

It was the week President Donald Trump had signed a sweeping executive order shutting off the funding for foreign aid programs. Inside the U.S. Agency for International Development, his political appointees gathered shell-shocked senior staffers for private meetings to discuss the storied agency’s new reality.

Those staffers immediately raised objections. USAID’s programs were funded by Congress, and there were rules to follow before halting the payments, they said. Instead of reassuring them, the agency’s then-chief of staff, Matt Hopson, told staff that the White House did not plan on restarting most of the aid projects, according to two officials familiar with his comments.

Then Hopson added a stark coda: Trump could not have a higher tolerance for legal risk, the officials recalled. They understood the message to mean that the administration was willing to bend or even break laws to get what it wanted, and then take the fight to court. (Hopson, who resigned shortly after, did not respond to numerous phone calls and written messages requesting comment, and he turned away a reporter who came to his door.)

No president in history has unilaterally shuttered an agency formally enshrined in law — let alone deputized his wealthiest donor, Elon Musk, to carry out that task in his name with little oversight or accountability.

While USAID was first created by President John F. Kennedy in a 1961 executive order, Congress passed a law in 1998 to make it an “independent establishment” like others in the cabinet. Multiple administrations, Democratic and Republican alike, built USAID into an institution that has helped save millions of lives around the world, promoted U.S. interests in remote corners of the globe and employed thousands of Americans.

Now Trump and Musk have nearly destroyed it in three weeks. “It’s very hard not to see what’s going on as a constitutional crisis,” said Peter Shane, a law professor and one of the country’s leading scholars on the Constitution. “It’s very scary and tragic.”

Several experts consulted by ProPublica said the new administration may have broken the law almost immediately.

Around Jan. 31, Jason Gray, the acting administrator of USAID, passed along orders to the agency’s IT department to hand the entire digital network to Musk’s engineers, Luke Farritor and Gavin Kliger, among others. (Farritor, Kliger and Gray did not respond to requests for comment.)

Get in Touch

Do you work in the federal government? Have information about humanitarian aid? Reach out via Signal to reporters Brett Murphy at 508-523-5195 and Anna Maria Barry-Jester at 408-504-8131.

From there, the engineers from Musk’s Department of Government Efficiency quickly gained access to USAID’s financial system. On top of that, they became “super administrators” and had access to thousands of employees’ personal information, including their desktop files and emails, two USAID officials told ProPublica. The material also included information gathered during security clearance background checks, ranging from Social Security numbers and credit histories to home addresses.

“They had complete access to everything you could think of,” one official said. “The keys to the kingdom.”

By providing that access, USAID may have violated the Privacy Act of 1974, three experts on the law told ProPublica, regardless if the engineers were government employees at the time. The law requires consent from individuals before the government gives their private information to anyone.

“It is a catastrophic privacy and information security violation for a band of some government and some nongovernment personnel to barge into an agency and take over systems that contain personal information,” said John Davisson, director of litigation at Electronic Privacy Information Center and one of the country’s foremost authorities on the Privacy Act. Breaking the law can carry civil penalties and a minimum $1,000 fine for each violation if the victim can prove they were harmed, or much more if there were damages like loss of income.

With a series of executive orders, Trump established DOGE as a technology unit to improve IT and human resources functions at government agencies. He ordered his cabinet to give “full and prompt access to all unclassified agency records, software systems, and IT systems.” There are exemptions to the Privacy Act if those accessing the personal files have proper authorization, which includes special training and other rules for each set of records, and if they are conducting routine USAID business. But the three experts ProPublica consulted said that doesn’t appear to be the case here.

Davisson and others said that the law, which Congress passed with overwhelming support from both parties in the wake of Watergate, is meant to prevent presidents and others in high office from abusing their access to records for political ends. “The Privacy Act stands at the fountainhead of all this,” he added. “It stops that constitutional crisis from tipping off in the first place.”

For this story, ProPublica spoke with dozens of current and former USAID officials — many of whom requested anonymity because they feared retribution from the administration — and consulted the country’s leading authorities in government structure, federal law and the Constitution. While other media accounts have detailed several key moments in the blitzkrieg on USAID, this article provides new details about what Trump and Musk’s lieutenants did, what they said at the time and the objections that those within the government raised along the way.

In addition to the Privacy Act, experts told ProPublica the administration may have broken other laws while violating the Constitution itself, including the separation of powers and a president’s duty to faithfully execute the laws of the land. Failing to notify Congress before making major changes to the agency may have transgressed the Administrative Procedures Act, and freezing money appropriated by Congress for foreign aid could be in violation of the Impoundment Control Act.

Officials and experts have been closely watching the developments at USAID out of fear that Trump will deploy the same playbook to target other agencies he has publicly criticized, including the Department of Education.

The Republican-controlled Congress and Trump’s Department of Justice are unlikely to initiate investigations into allegations of wrongdoing by administration officials. In fact, the DOJ’s acting U.S. attorney in Washington, who was a lawyer for Jan. 6 defendants, signaled the very opposite in a recent series of letters to Musk, promising to investigate people who illegally impeded DOGE’s efforts or even those who just acted unethically “and chase them to the end of the Earth.” The DOJ did not respond to requests for comment.

That leaves lawsuits. On Thursday, federal worker groups sued the administration, accusing Trump of violating the Constitution by systematically disemboweling the agency without congressional approval. The next day, a Trump-appointed judge issued an injunction temporarily halting a major part of the administration’s efforts to reduce USAID’s more than 10,000-person workforce to a few hundred.

The administration argued during a hearing on Friday that the president has acted within his authority and continues to press its case. Trump and his advisers have long planned to assert in court that presidents have sweeping power to withhold funding from programs they dislike.

The lawsuit is so far the only substantive challenge Trump and Musk have faced since they began dismantling the agency. The judge’s ruling raises questions about what will happen if workers try to use USAID systems or buildings on Monday and are denied access.

“USAID is driving the radical left crazy, and there is nothing they can do about it,” Trump posted that same day, in all capital letters. “Close it down!”

The White House, USAID, the State Department and Musk did not respond to detailed lists of questions for this article. Previously, the administration has said, “Those leading this mission with Elon Musk are doing so in full compliance with federal law, appropriate security clearances, and as employees of the relevant agencies, not as outside advisors or entities.”

Over the past week, they have defended their assault on the agency by repeatedly amplifying the once-fringe sentiment that USAID had become a conduit for wasteful spending, fraud and corruption. The judge on Friday noted the administration provided no evidence to support those claims. But Musk and Trump have successfully fueled intense animosity toward the agency anyway, drumming up support for their effort to destroy it.

“We spent the weekend feeding USAID into the woodchipper,” Musk posted Monday on X. He is the richest man in the world, and his company SpaceX has received at least $15.4 billion in contracts over the past decade from the same government he has pledged to cleanse of wasteful spending.

“USAID is a criminal organization,” Musk said on X. “Time for it to die.”

In the frenzied days after the arrival of Musk’s engineers at USAID, they used their access to the agency’s IT systems to begin identifying bureaus to cull and programs to terminate, USAID officials told ProPublica. They were working under the direction of another political appointee named Peter Marocco, the director of foreign affairs at the State Department.

Around that time, Marocco drafted the order that required American-funded aid projects around the world to close down. Marocco — who held a leadership role at USAID during Trump’s previous administration, where staff formally accused him of undermining the agency’s mission — did not respond to a list of questions from ProPublica.

After the stop-work orders began going out, Trump’s aides and the DOGE team then turned their focus to the agency’s workforce, which is staffed by civil servants, foreign service officers and contractors. Their initial step was to oust about 60 top supervisors, including the agency’s attorneys.

Next, the administration issued stop-work orders to staffing companies in Washington, effectively laying off hundreds of workers at once. Presidents generally have wide latitude to cancel such contracts, though there is typically a deliberative process. A move like that has never been done at this scale before, experts said. The workers who lost their jobs had no civil service protections.

But that still left the bulk of the direct government workforce. The administration managed to figure out a way to sideline civil servants without officially firing them: They placed hundreds of USAID’s career staff on indefinite administrative leave — with pay but without explanation — or simply locked them out of the agency systems. Some who received no notice used their personal email addresses to ask about their status and received a reply from human resources that they “have likely been placed on administrative leave,” without official confirmation, according to emails obtained by ProPublica.

Taxpayers are currently paying for them not to work. That maneuver went at the heart of what was regarded as a sacrosanct tenet in American government: that civil servants remain outside partisan politics and can’t be fired without due process.

In another stunning move, Marocco recalled back home 1,400 of USAID’s overseas foreign service officers, who were supposed to have similar job protections.

“This is a masterpiece of administrative design,” said Donald Kettl, the former dean in the School of Public Policy at the University of Maryland who has written multiple books about government structure. “It’s unprecedented in its scale,” Kettl added. “Each of these things has been done individually, but never all rolled together as one package and focused strategically like a series of intercontinental ballistic missiles.”

Musk’s employees told staff they could not come to USAID’s headquarters. Guards now stand sentry with a clipboard to block almost everyone from getting inside. On Friday, a maintenance crew took the agency’s title off the building’s facade.

What happens now is unclear. Friday’s court injunction temporarily prevents the administration from placing about 2,000 more people on leave, orders the reinstatement of 500 others and stops the recall of foreign service officials from abroad.

In recent days, ProPublica has interviewed dozens of USAID officials and contractors who have found themselves suddenly out of work and cut off from the government they had devoted their lives to serving. “I am a combat veteran of the U.S. Marine Corps and not a deranged Marxist as Elon is shouting,” one employee told ProPublica.

“I have lived through a dictatorship before,” said another. “I know what these look like, and the writing is on the wall for me.”

A third: “I don’t think Americans seem to understand what’s at stake here. This is a heist. It’s a hostile takeover by malicious actors of our entire government.”

At various points, those within the agency who tried standing up against what they considered to be illegal abuses or immoderate management say they were punished for it. “There are no guardrails left,” another USAID official told ProPublica. “And there’s nobody left to stop it.”

The agency’s heads of security were put on leave after they blocked Musk’s engineers from accessing the classified servers last weekend. Then the same happened to the top human resources officer after he refused to put an additional 1,400 staffers on leave Tuesday. Both episodes were first reported by the trade publication Devex.

Likewise, when the USAID labor director reversed the administration’s decision to place almost 60 senior civil servants on leave at the onset, he was put on leave too. “The agency’s front office and DOGE instructed me to violate the due process of our employees by issuing immediate termination notices,” the labor director wrote in an email to staff.

“It is and has always been my office’s commitment to the workforce that we ensure all employees receive their due process,” he added. “I will not be a party to a violation of that commitment.”

A security guard stands at the entrance to the USAID headquarters on Monday. (Kevin Dietsch/Getty Images)

Early last week, Secretary of State Marco Rubio — a staunch supporter of USAID during his time in the Senate — sent Congress a letter saying that the administration “may move” some of the agency’s bureaus under the State Department, the kind of notification that is required 15 days before any major overhaul can take place, according to federal law. He told the lawmakers that the administration intended to work with them on a “review and potential reorganization of USAID’s activities,” and that Marocco would lead the effort.

If it were true, experts say his sentiment would more closely reflect the legal requirements that Congress has laid out since establishing USAID as an independent agency. But experts and government officials said the letter is an inadequate attempt to retrospectively justify what has already occurred.

That difference — between what the administration told lawmakers it was doing to USAID and what it was actually doing — was on display during a previously unreported episode in late January.

Peter Marocco (U.S. Department of Defense)

In late January, Marocco spoke with congressional aides representing both parties and both chambers. During a series of a half dozen phone calls — he declined to see them in person — the aides asked him to explain the rationale behind the stop-work orders the administration had sent around the world and the process for organizations to receive a waiver from program freezes.

Marocco declined to give substantive responses and claimed the waiver process was operating smoothly, one of the aides told ProPublica.

Marocco said shutting down USAID programs would give the administration an opportunity to see which ones would make America safer and stronger, which was Trump’s promise to voters. He added that he would be personally reviewing programs that requested a waiver and decide which ones should go to Rubio for final approval.

Meanwhile, organizations all over the world remain either grounded under stop-work orders or unable to draw on U.S. funds to continue working, as ProPublica previously reported. The agency put many people who could help process those payments on leave. Among the programs affected were efforts to feed malnourished children in Sudan, bring clean water to refugees in Yemen and deliver medicines to people living with HIV.

During the briefings, the congressional aides acknowledged that there are legitimate things to criticize about USAID. In the past, the agency has been accused of poor oversight of its contractors and interminable support for projects that were meant to end years ago. “I believe the purpose of foreign assistance should be ending its need to exist,” the agency’s former administrator Mark Green once said. And it was the president’s prerogative to focus on programs that align with his agenda. “But,” one of the aides told Marocco, “none of that justifies anything you’re doing.”

Days later, during a recent meeting with USAID staff in Guatemala, Rubio claimed they’d had a “problem” with some people back in the U.S. and that some of the agency’s programs undermined the Trump administration’s goals, according to a transcript of his comments. He also suggested that exceptions to Marocco’s foreign service recall could be made for people with extenuating circumstances, such as pregnant staffers in their third trimester or a person on dialysis.

By Thursday, there were plans to decimate entire USAID bureaus without inviting back the majority of staff on administrative leave. A group tracking the fallout estimates nearly 52,000 American jobs, including those working for vendors and contractors, were already eliminated in the last two weeks. “I fail to understand how having thousands of Americans lose their jobs puts America first,” said Nidhi Bouri, who worked for nearly a decade at USAID, the last two as a political appointee of President Joe Biden.

It’s legally murky if Trump simply keeps them on indefinite administrative leave. Under the Administrative Leave Act of 2016, an individual can only be placed on paid leave for 10 days a year. But a regulation issued by the Biden administration specifies that limitation only applies when that person is under investigation. Legal experts say the interpretation has since been that if there is no investigation, an employee can be placed on leave indefinitely, so long as they continue receiving a paycheck.

Not everyone is sure the Biden-era regulation will hold up in court. “That hasn’t been challenged, and it’s relatively new,” said Nick Bednar, a law professor at the University of Minnesota. “There’s enough of us that think that regulation is inconsistent with statute and if argued in court it might be considered invalid.”

The USAID office in Tegucigalpa, Honduras (Orlando Sierra/AFP/Getty Images)

It is illegal for the Trump administration to unilaterally dissolve an agency created by Congress, according to legal scholars, government experts and the congressional research facility.

“For all intents and purposes you are dismantling an agency created by Congress, and that’s a violation of the law,” said Lawrence Gostin, a professor at Georgetown Law. “It can’t stand unchallenged, in my view.”

And while a president has broad discretion to make changes to programs and reduce the workforce, the Impoundment Control Act prevents him from withholding money appropriated by Congress, the experts said.

“If it turns out that the president can eliminate or defund an agency on a whim, then ultimately Congress is stripped of all power over the budget,” said Jessica Riedl, a senior fellow at the Manhattan Institute, a conservative think tank. “That would create a precedent that destroys the separation of powers.”

It will be the courts that decide if and to what extent Trump’s takeover of USAID violated federal law.

Many legal experts in and outside of government believe this was the administration’s plan all along: drag out Trump’s most aggressive and controversial policy decisions in court for so long that by the time any permanent judgment comes down, favorable or not, USAID will be nothing but a memory.

“They don’t seem to care what the statutes say,” said Kevin Owen, an attorney who represents both management and federal workers in employment disputes. “The plan from the employment perspective was to fire them all and make them sue. If the administration loses the court cases, so be it. The damage is done.”

Do you work in the federal government? Have information about humanitarian aid? Reach out via Signal to reporters Brett Murphy at 508-523-5195 and Anna Maria Barry-Jester at 408-504-8131.

10 Feb 19:12

Hiding data in an emoji

by Nathan Yau

Messing with how emojis are encoded, Paul Butler demonstrates how one might hide data via a smiley:

Most unicode characters do not have variations associated with them. Since unicode is an evolving standard and aims to be future-compatible, variation selectors are supposed to be preserved during transformations, even if their meaning is not known by the code handling them. So the codepoint U+0067 (“g”) followed by U+FE01 (VS-2) renders as a lowercase “g”, exactly the same as U+0067 alone. But if you copy and paste it, the variation selector will tag along with it.

Since 256 is exactly enough variations to represent a single byte, this gives us a way to “hide” one byte of data in any other unicode codepoint.

Use this simple tool to give it a whirl 😀󠄼󠅟󠅞󠅗󠄐󠅜󠅙󠅦󠅕󠄐󠅤󠅘󠅕󠄐󠅔󠅑󠅤󠅑󠄐󠅠󠅟󠅙󠅞󠅤󠄞.

Tags: emoji, Paul Butler, secret

10 Feb 16:56

Cooler weather is on the horizon; and should we privatize the National Weather Service?

by Eric Berger

In brief: Today’s post looks ahead to when Houston will start to feel more like winter again (the answer for most of us is Thursday morning). Additionally, with the potential for significant budget cuts on the horizon, we discuss how NOAA and the National Weather Service provide considerable value.

The value of the National Weather Service

There has been a lot of talk about cutting the US government via the “Department of Government Efficiency,” which is ostensibly assessing the performance of each US agency to improve its output. There are a lot of strong feelings about the actions of this body, spearheaded by Elon Musk, and it is beyond the scope of this website to judge its value. Suffice it to say we believe there is bloat in the US government that ought to be addressed, but at the same time US agencies provide valuable services, and most civil servants are trying to do the right thing.

This morning I want to write a few words about the value brought by the federal government’s weather and climate agency, NOAA, in general; and one of its organizations, the National Weather Service, in particular. We strongly believe that NOAA and the National Weather Service provide tremendous value to American taxpayers that cannot easily be replicated by private companies—most definitely including Space City Weather.

NOAA collects an extraordinary amount of data about our planet’s atmosphere and oceans every day. They send hundreds of weather balloons into the skies. They have a vast network of buoys and weather stations. They operate state-of-the-art radars. When there is a hurricane, NOAA and its partners operate a fleet of aircraft and professionals that fly into the maw of the storm to gather vital data that is used to make warnings, and improve forecasts.

It not only collects this data, but NOAA plays an important role in weather modeling, operating one of the world’s premiere computational forecast systems. Moreover, its high-resolution models are vital to predicting thunderstorms and severe weather on a local scale, as well as the evolution of hurricanes. Matt and I use these high-resolution models every day. And NOAA shares all of this data and information, for free, with the world to improve weather prediction.

During hurricane season, much of the world looks to the National Hurricane Center in Miami for actionable information. But within NOAA there is also the Storm Prediction Center, which forecasts tornado outbreaks and other severe weather; the Weather Prediction Center, which forecasts rainfall amounts; and of course the National Weather Service, which has offices around the country, including one in the Houston-Galveston area. Dedicated meteorologists there provide around-the-clock forecasts and issue life-saving warnings. Matt and I know these people, and they work really hard for all of us.

Local decisionmakers and Emergency Management System officials in every city and county in America rely on local forecast officers for everything from closing roads and schools, to calling for evacuations and or opening cooling centers, and so much more.

So can’t we just privatize all of this? Not easily. Most private weather companies do not collect essential data about our atmosphere or oceans, or issue public warnings. Typically, they provide proprietary forecasts that tailor and fine-tune public information for specific applications beyond the core mission of the National Weather Service. No private company could provide high quality forecasts if not for the data that NOAA freely disseminates.

What about just getting forecasts from the app on my phone? Well, a lot of the weather apps on your phone are serviced by back-end data provided by the National Weather Service (including ours), or the models operated by NOAA. And those fancy radars on your phone telling you when to stay put? Those are operated by NOAA.

The bottom line is that it would be a bad idea to take a hammer and start whacking NOAA and the National Weather Service. If there is bloat, or fraud, or waste, by all means root it out. But if we destroy the core mission of these valuable federal weather services, we will all lose.

Monday

Temperatures this morning are somewhat cooler, with a weak front having pushed into Houston and all the way down to the coast. The key word here is weak, and the front’s impact won’t last for long, especially for areas south of I-10. With that said, temperatures today will generally be in the upper 60s, with cloudy skies helping to keep us on the cooler side. Winds will be out of the east this morning, but should gradually turn southeast this afternoon and evening, and this southerly flow will only allow lows to drop into the low- to mid-60s for much of Houston.

Tuesday

Weather on Tuesday will be warmer and more dynamic. Highs will reach near 80 degrees for much of the area, with mostly cloudy skies. There will be a chance for some light showers on Tuesday morning, with an increasing chance of rain and the potential for some thunderstorms on Tuesday afternoon and evening as the upper atmosphere becomes more perturbed. Rain chances slacken a bit Tuesday night, with lows dropping into the upper 60s.

NOAA rain accumulation forecast for now through Wednesday morning. (Weather Bell)

Wednesday

This will be another warm day, with highs in the 70s to 80 degrees. We’re going to see another chance of showers and thunderstorms ahead of a cool front, which should arrive later in the day. It is not entirely clear how long it will take the cooler and drier air to move down through the area, but Wednesday night will be notably cooler for areas inland of Interstate 10, with cooler air probably coming in for coastal areas later.

Thursday

This will be a notably cooler day, with highs likely topping out in the upper 50s, with a mixture of sunshine and clouds. We can’t rule out a few lingering showers. Lows on Thursday night will probably drop into the 40s.

Lows on Friday morning should finally feel winter-like again for all of Houston. (Weather Bell)

Friday, Saturday, and Sunday

At this point, it looks like we’ll start warming up again on Friday and especially Saturday, with highs climbing back into the 70s by Saturday, with rising humidity levels. Another cold front appears likely to pass through the area on Saturday night-ish, which will push us back into winter-like temperatures on Sunday, with highs likely only in the upper 50s or so. The details on this are a bit fuzzy, but basically Saturday should be warm, and Sunday quite a bit cooler with a better chance for clear skies.

Next week

Our roller coaster weather continues, most likely, with a succession of fronts bringing varying weather conditions from spring- to winter-like. Several readers with itchy gardening inclinations have asked about the likelihood of another freeze in the Houston area this year, and that’s a topic I’ll address in tomorrow’s post.

10 Feb 15:50

Remembering Boca Chica Beach—Before Elon Musk Came to Town

by Gaige Davila

One Saturday late last summer, Boca Chica Beach was cloudy and oppressively humid. An incoming thunderstorm stretched from Matamoros to Brownsville several miles away, which I could see over the flat Tamaulipan thornscrub, just past the duneline and SpaceX’s launch towers. 

Thunder intermittently interrupted the sound of crashing waves, but the storm was otherwise not threatening those gathered here. This group, made up of local organizers and Rio Grande Valley residents, was intent on being at Boca Chica Beach—at Texas’ southernmost tip, across the ship channel from touristy South Padre Island—then and into the future. 

(Gaige Davila)

ENTRE, a community archive and film center based in Harlingen, hosted the gathering to help people learn more about Boca Chica Beach. Under a handful of canopies were plastic tables and chairs, coolers, and several people talking about the beach sprawling before us. 

This event, “Playa de Memorias,” was an extension of ENTRE’s archival project called Boca Chica, Corazón Grande. For the past three years, ENTRE has collected photos, home movies, and oral histories of Boca Chica from Valley residents, who’ve visited the free-access beach, little-known to tourists from the rest of the state, for generations to fish, barbecue, and even camp overnight. On this day, people were welcomed to make their own memories and appreciate the Valley’s past, present, and future. 

Children played as the adults—organizers, journalists, and artists—traded stories. Against the dunes, chef and anthropologist Luna Vela, alongside chefs Nadia Casaperalta and Mia Eustaquio, served food including flounder ceviche with heirloom corn tostadas and wave-patterned quesadillas with nopales, both odes to the foodways of the people who lived here long before the place had a European name. 

Along with offering nourishment after hours spent in the sun and gulf, the dishes were made with the idea in mind that everything tastes better on the beach. “I’m just trying to feed that magic, feed that feeling,” Vela told me. 

Some attendees wore shirts highlighting that Boca Chica Beach is the ancestral land of the Carrizo/Comecrudo Tribe. (Gaige Davila)

Among the group were organizers who’ve spent years fighting against the encroachment of Elon Musk’s SpaceX launchpad, which looms over Boca Chica, and the hulking production facility up the road. Local officials have ignored their outcry, including over excessive closures of the only road leading to the beach, so this group is trying to raise awareness in the Valley.

The hope is that the more people who see Boca Chica Beach and feel its connection to the Valley’s collective memory, the more likely it will be saved from further development. The effort is especially pertinent as SpaceX plans to launch its massive Starship rocket up to 25 times a year and add more buildings—and as Musk looks set to receive special treatment from a second Donald Trump administration.

“There is also this desire to show that regardless of how you feel about SpaceX, there is no doubt that Boca Chica is changing because of its development,” Monica Sosa, the project curatorial manager for ENTRE’s Boca Chica, Corazón Grande, said. “If this entity is continuing to ask for an increase in rocket launches, we are not going to have this [beach] anymore as it is right now.” 

As Boca Chica, Corazón Grande is a preservation project for images of Boca Chica, it too is one for the people fighting for it. Years of advocacy have burnt out many organizers met with indifference by local leadership. They and other locals are grieving for what Boca Chica Beach and Brownsville were before SpaceX, Sosa said. 

(Gaige Davila)

Destruction isn’t always something physical, but also something done to memory. Without looking at photos, home movies, and listening to stories, it’s hard to remember what Boca Chica was before SpaceX came to town about a decade ago and expanded, especially since 2018.
“It is a preservation project across the board,” Sosa said. “But it’s also an active project on self-preservation for us as community members.”

People are still coming to Boca Chica Beach, even as SpaceX’s footprint grows seemingly by the day, its reach along Highway 4 ever expanding. SpaceX’s ability to have the beach closed on Labor Day is restricted, and people take advantage. 

The storm eventually made its way to the gathering but only for a few moments. The drizzle dissipated, and the clouds rounded around the launch towers. Everyone carried on, reenergized by a cool wind and the Gulf oysters now being served. 

Growing up in nearby Port Isabel, I visited this beach frequently when I was younger, as did my father’s family long before I was alive. I only vaguely remember what it looked like before the towers and before the noise. When I look out at the gulf, surrounded by those who’ve tried mostly in vain to protect this place, I recall those memories more easily.

The post Remembering Boca Chica Beach—Before Elon Musk Came to Town appeared first on The Texas Observer.

10 Feb 15:49

Houston ToolBank opens second Fort Bend County location

by Natalie Weber, Fort Bend County Bureau
Nonprofits, churches, civic clubs and other charitable organizations can rent tools such as lawnmowers and generators and pick them up at a Fulshear-area park.
10 Feb 15:48

should you get fired for bad behavior at a football game, I’m worried my boss is laying a paper trail to fire me, and more

by Ask a Manager

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager.

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…

1. Should you get fired for (even really bad) behavior at a football game?

I’m a big football fan and a feminist and civil liberties advocate. So I am really struggling with the question of a fan at the Eagles-Green Bay Wild Card game. He is on someone’s cell phone video (which of course was posted on social media) yelling misogynistic insults at a woman from the opposing fan base.

The team banned him from coming to future games, a sanction I support (this was beyond the usual jawboning at high-stakes games). But people online also tracked down where he worked and called for him to be dealt with at work. He lost his job (I read).

I wonder if this is just … too much. On the one hand, I can see a company not wanting to be associated with someone who became so notorious for his behavior. But it was not at work, not between coworkers. Before social media, his workplace might never have known about this.

On an emotional level, part of me thinks — good! This is what you get! But it also seems like a pretty big punishment for bad behavior not related to work or happening anywhere near the workplace. I always hated the term “canceled,” since I think it was used to describe situations where people were rightly called out for bad behavior or racist/misogynistic comments in public. But I also chafe at the idea that someone’s entire life falls apart because of behavior outside of work. What do you think? Did management do the right thing?

Well, this wasn’t a guy just being high-spirited in a moment of competition! He yelled really offensive insults at a woman and repeatedly insulted her looks simply because she was cheering for the opposing team … and he worked for a consulting firm that promotes themselves as being “DEI champions.” If I imagine hiring that consulting firm and then seeing that guy walk in to run my project, I don’t think it’s unreasonable that his company chose to part ways with him.

I do think there’s nuance here. If it hadn’t been recorded and gone viral and his firm only knew about because, for example, a colleague was at the game and told them about it, they’d probably have been less likely to fire him. But it did go viral, which makes the reputational hit to the firm a bigger risk (again, imagine hiring that company and he’s the guy they send, or imagine simply being his female coworker) … and there’s also something more viscerally upsetting about seeing a video of that behavior than just hearing about it secondhand.

I don’t think his company was out of line.

2. Can I tell my employee about a charity raffle I know he’d be interested in?

I’m grand-boss to a fantastic employee who travels extensively, including Disney multiple times a year. He mentioned that one of his bucket-list items is to spend a night in the suite in Cinderella’s castle. (That’s the one that can’t be bought, not for any amount of money). The only way I know to get a stay there is by winning it in a charity raffle for an organization I love; it’s a special resort near Disney just for terminally ill kids and their families, like mine, and we made many happy memories there. They just opened up this year’s raffle ($10 per ticket). I’d feel icky not giving him the chance to do something he’s dreamed of, but is it out of line for me to send him the info, since this is a charity I’ve personally benefited from? If it makes any difference, he’s financially comfortable.

Send him the info! Just saying “I know you’ve mentioned you’d love to do this and as far as I know this is the only way, so I thought you might be interested” isn’t inappropriate pressure. He can enter or not and doesn’t even need to tell you what he decides.

3. I’m worried that my boss and HR are laying a paper trail to fire me

Yesterday, I got a call from the HR manager asking if I could meet with her and my boss near the end of the day. They raised issues about my performance, pointing out a few mistakes I’ve made in the last year, and asked me what they could do to help me. But when I had a suggestion (tell me when a task is given to me if it’s high priority/to be done immediately), it was shot down. (They didn’t really give a reason. They just said that I had to be more proactive and ask for that info myself.) I was caught off-guard by the entire thing and couldn’t muster any thoughts in the moment. A follow-up meeting has been promised but not scheduled. I also sent an email around just to have a record of what I was asked to do specifically, and the response was very general “improve your performance” stuff.

I am terrified. This does not feel like a good-faith effort to improve my performance, it feels like laying the groundwork to fire me. I have never gotten a performance review in the six years I’ve worked here and only the most minimal feedback, so I had no idea I was on thin ice. About eight months ago, I went to HR about how I was being bullied by a more favored / trusted / influential employee, when it finally got to the point where my mental health was badly suffering from it, and I felt taken seriously at the time but I never heard anything else about it, and now I feel like this may be retaliation.

The sensible response would be to leave this toxic environment, but unfortunately it’s extremely hard to get a job in my industry: it took me two years of trying just to get this one. I’m worried that if I leave for something generic to tide me over, I’ll be kissing my career goodbye. Do you have any advice for me? Am I possibly making a mountain out of a molehill?

You should take it seriously. It doesn’t mean they’re necessarily preparing to fire you, but they could be.

Do you know anything about how your company normally handles terminations, like whether they commit to following a process of formal warnings first or whether it can be more out-of-the-blue? That info can inform your thinking. Meanwhile, though, go back to your boss, let her know that you’re taking the conversation seriously and plan to do XYZ to improve, and tell her you’d appreciate any other feedback or guidance she can offer. (And yes, they should tell you when a task is high-priority, but since they’re telling you to ask for that yourself, be vigilant about asking for it.)

Beyond that, it would be smart to job-search — not because you’ll necessarily need it, and you don’t need to take a new job just because it’s offered to you, but if you’re concerned, you should start laying the groundwork to move on in case you end up having to. (I know it being hard to find a job in your field feels like a reason not to go that route, but that’s actually more of a reason to start now so you’re not starting from scratch later.)

4. Employer said I retired, but I quit because I’m frustrated

I founded a nonprofit organization over 30 years ago, and for many years was the sole employee. The organization has always had a board of directors that participated in strategic planning and volunteering for the organization. Over the years, the organization grew, and now I am one of five employees.

Last year I went through a period of ill health; I cut back my hours and suggested a reduction in my pay to the board, which they agreed to. While I was recuperating, the board made some major changes to how we operate, which have raised costs and diminished the organization’s income. As a result, the organization is struggling to meet payroll, and the board informed me that they are cutting my salary again, by quite a lot. I wasn’t happy with this and turned in my resignation.

The board has just sent out a communication to all our members telling everyone that I have retired. I did not retire! I resigned because I am frustrated with the board’s direction and very unhappy with my salary situation. I am planning some new projects in the same line of work and don’t want potential new clients assuming I’ve stepped out of the working world entirely. Should I try to get the board to put out a correction? Am I making too big a deal about this?

I’d be pretty annoyed by that, particularly since I’d assume they framed it as a retirement because that looks better for them. That said, it’s probably not going to have a major impact on your ability to attract clients afterwards, particularly if you’re planning on approaching clients to pitch your work (which will make it very clear you didn’t retire).

Still, though, at a minimum you can ask the board why they misrepresented your departure and, depending on how you feel about their answer, you could in theory ask them to set the record straight in their next membership communication. (A special communication just for this would be overkill, but they could correct the info in whatever they happen to be sending out next.)

5. Can I advocate for myself during layoffs?

I’m not a federal worker, but I work in a field that is adjacent to the feds and my org has experienced a devastating financial impact from the executive orders issued over the past couple of weeks. We’ve been told this week that our division needs to reduce its budget by one-third as soon as possible; this means laying off roughly one-third of our staff, since we have few other programmatic expenses.

Right now my division is organized into teams of specialists, and my specialty is research. However, the extreme nature of our upcoming layoffs likely means that staff who are left will need to wear a few different hats, rather than be specialists. They will also understandably want to prioritize roles that are revenue-producing, and mine is not.

Compounding this is that I’ve only been with this org for about two years and just came back from a three-month maternity leave. But, because I worked in education and academia before this role, I actually have experience (and I would argue, strong skills) in many of the other specialized areas of my division — I’ve had those roles before! Many other colleagues have a 5+ year history here, including through other reorganizations, so I think their varied skill set is better known than mine.

Given that, I’m wondering how directly I could raise this point about my past experiences to my manager in the hopes of making the case for keeping me on in some modified role. They may not need a full-time researcher anymore, but I could easily split my time between that and other roles which do produce more revenue for the org. Is there any chance of this working?

I am applying for new roles, of course, but given that this is a sector-wide crisis, I don’t expect to have any job offers in hand when the layoffs happen in the next few weeks, and I strongly suspect (because the EOs have practically eliminated our org’s cash flow for the moment) that we won’t get any severance either. As a new mom, I’m just trying to find some way to keep an income and health insurance for me and my kid, but I also want to keep a good relationship with my peers and managers (for references, job hunting, etc.) and don’t want to stray too far outside professional norms in how I advocate for myself.

You absolutely should let your manager know what you’d be capable of doing, and up for doing! If it’s easy to meet with her in the next day or two, do it that way, but otherwise email since it’s time-sensitive. Frame it as, “I know we’re looking at a significant reorganization and a lot of roles will need to be combined, so I wanted to highlight my past experience with XYZ. (Be detailed here.) I’d be happy to take on responsibilities in any of those areas in addition to what I’m doing now.”

Obviously your motivation is to find a way to stay on, but you’re also presenting her with a potential solution to a business problem and providing relevant info so it’s not overstepping at all.

10 Feb 15:43

Lock Clicks Behind Marco Rubio During Tour Of Salvadoran Prison Cell

by The Onion Staff

TECOLUCA, EL SALVADOR—Expressing concern after he stepped inside the cold, concrete room and suddenly heard the click of a lock behind him, a panicked Secretary of State Marco Rubio was reportedly trapped Monday in a cell while on a tour of one of the world’s largest prisons in El Salvador. “Uh, guys, I think there’s been some kind of misunderstanding—I’m here on a diplomatic visit, not because I’m a criminal,” said the 53-year-old former Florida senator and current Trump official, who then laughed, called over a prison guard, and nervously attempted to explain that he was looking for a prison to lock people up in, not to be locked up in himself. “All right, all right, we’ve had our fun, but as the American secretary of state, I demand you release me immediately. I’ll have you know that President Trump is waiting for me back in the U.S., and he’ll come looking for me soon if you don’t let me out. Wait, guards, where are you going? Hello! Hello?” At press time, sources confirmed Rubio had shouted for help and desperately pulled at the steel bars before turning around to see his cellmate grinning and slowly sharpening a toothbrush shiv.

The post Lock Clicks Behind Marco Rubio During Tour Of Salvadoran Prison Cell appeared first on The Onion.

10 Feb 15:42

Genius Outsmarts Bank By Using Credit Card To Pay Off Other Credit Card

by The Onion Staff

ZANESVILLE, OH—Smugly muttering “watch and learn” as he opened his Chase app and pressed the “pay balance” button, local genius Todd Garett reportedly outsmarted his bank Monday by using a credit card to pay off another credit card.  “Well, well, well—looks like I did make my payments this month,” said Garett, who rubbed his hands together, threw back his head, and cackled as he deftly moved over $16,000 in expenses between several high-interest Visa, Mastercard, and American Express credit cards. “Ha ha! They think they’re so smart, but these banks are mere putty in my hands. These idiots tried to threaten me with collections. Who’s the big dog now?” At press time, sources reported that Garett had successfully cleared his debt in a feat of financial brilliance by canceling his credit card with a negative balance.

The post Genius Outsmarts Bank By Using Credit Card To Pay Off Other Credit Card appeared first on The Onion.

10 Feb 15:42

Kangaroo Embryo Produced Through IVF For First Time

by The Onion Staff

Researchers in Australia said that they have for the first time successfully produced kangaroo embryos through in-vitro fertilization, a breakthrough that may help save endangered species from extinction. What do you think?

“Who’s crazy for stockpiling kangaroo semen now?”

Richard Dartis, Unemployed

“Australia is lightyears ahead of us in virtually all areas of kangaroo science.”

Eric Pinkston, Paddleboard Instructor

“Is it ethical to bring more kangaroos into the world right now?”

Violetta Twilley, Turtle Racer

The post Kangaroo Embryo Produced Through IVF For First Time appeared first on The Onion.

10 Feb 15:42

Bird Flu: Myth Vs. Fact

by The Onion Staff

An outbreak of avian flu is currently affecting birds both on farms and in the wild. The Onion debunks common myths surrounding the virus.

MYTH: Bird flu only affects birds.

FACT: Bird flu can affect anyone with a beak.

MYTH: Bird flu has killed over 100 million chickens.

FACT: The chickens were struck down by God for their wanton and lustful lifestyle.

MYTH: Contracting bird flu is always fatal for humans.

FACT: If that’s what it’s going to take to make you stop letting pigeons eat directly from your mouth, sure. 

MYTH: Factory farms cause bird flu to spread rapidly.

FACT: Chickens are encouraged to stay home from work if they’re sick.

MYTH: Infected birds are quarantined, humanely euthanized, and their carcasses safely disposed of.

FACT: The KFC Famous Bowl is now only $2.99 for a limited time!

MYTH: U.S. officials have linked the current bird flu outbreak to China.

FACT: U.S. officials have yet to decide which country to scapegoat. 

The post Bird Flu: Myth Vs. Fact appeared first on The Onion.

10 Feb 15:41

A Note from the Contractor Working on Robert Plant’s Ambitious Home Remodeling Project

by John Moe

Dear Mr. Plant,

I wanted to talk with you in person, but you haven’t been around much lately. Hair salon or at J. R. R. Tolkien book club, I’m told. There are things we need to figure out, but you only seem to want to communicate through songs. I have received your tape, which I think addresses our project from your perspective. It’s not all that helpful.

First of all, yes, I understand that your wife (or “lady,” as you say) was excited about purchasing a glittery golden stairway. Well, it arrived, and I hate to tell you this, but it’s not gold. Someone just put gold glitter on a stairway made of plywood and old loading pallets, and that’s what got delivered.

But that’s not the big problem here. The big problem is that the stairway is infinity feet tall. It goes all the way to heaven. I didn’t even know they made those. I cannot get it into the house. It already breaks every kind of building code and zoning rule. It’s the tallest thing ever made. Impossibly tall and, really, an affront to God. Right now, it’s in the side yard, creaking.

Our practical challenges for this project go beyond the stairway, however, and your input has been confusing. You say there’s a feeling you get when you look to the west, then something about your spirit crying for leaving. And I need you to be clearer than that. I’m a contractor. Does this mean you want a large window facing west? And the crying spirit thing. Is that for the bathroom? Help me out, Mr. Plant.

Judging by your tape, I gather that you have some concerns about my crew’s conduct on the job site, and I can explain that. The rings of smoke through the trees you reference are just my guys smoking Marlboros. The “voices of those who stand looking” are the guys trying to figure out what we need to build. We need blueprints; you give us eternal staircases and cassette tapes.

Look, there are a lot of paths we can go by with this remodel, Mr. Plant. We can even completely change the road we’re on. But I can’t have my guys just standing around. You gotta meet me halfway. I have other jobs I need to do. Clapton keeps calling me.

Okay. I suppose we have to talk about the hedgerow. I am alarmed about the bustle going on in there. All the guys are. You tell us not to be alarmed because of this “May Queen.” Thing is, what you call the May Queen is, in fact, a live badger, Mr. Plant. You released badgers into the hedgerow when Mr. Page was here last time, remember? When you guys dressed up as hobbits? They’re biting everyone, and there are infections. We need to do something about the hedgerow. The bustle is a real threat.

The forests aren’t echoing with laughter, by the way. That’s the cackling cry of possibly rabid badgers. It makes for a difficult work site.

I know there was more you had to say in the cassette, especially where you get really fast and shouty, but I couldn’t handle it anymore, emotionally speaking. We can address those concerns later. The major problem right now is the stairway. It’s too big. It’s a stairway to heaven. My guys keep climbing it to visit their dead relatives and say hello, so that’s slowing everything down. We have to get rid of this stairway to heaven.

Sincerely,
Your Contractor

10 Feb 15:40

Awkward Zombie - Growth Opportunity

by tech@thehiveworks.com

New comic!

Today's News:

When I saw the huge empty dorm roof map with three tiny garden beds in the corner, my assumption was that I'd be able to expand that, but after a while I realized I was wrong. High schoolers are only responsible enough to grow three tomatoes per month.

10 Feb 04:02

Super Bowl Coin Toss Fractures World Into Infinite Multiverses Where Eagles Win, Lose, Earth Explodes

by The Onion Staff

NEW ORLEANS—Revealing that the cosmic branching event had startling consequences for the fabric of reality, experts confirmed Sunday that the Super Bowl coin toss had fractured the world into an infinite number of multiverses in which the Eagles win, the Eagles lose, the Earth explodes, and countless other possibilities. “Put simply, the moment this silver and gold coin hit the turf, it rapidly splintered our universe into branching timelines where one or the other team wins, the Eagles play the Chiefs to an endless tie, Travis Kelce is injured in the third quarter, the ball is a perfect cube, and every player on the field is swallowed by a sinkhole, among others,”  said theoretical physicist Daniel Liu, adding that due to causal divergence, his researchers have detected a universe in which, right now, a kickoff by Jake Elliott has gone so high that it exited the atmosphere and rocketed into outer space. “Some of these quantum bifurcations are so slight as to be virtually undetectable: Kendrick Lamar having a cough during his halftime performance, for example. Or Andy Reid, and Andy Reid alone, having a birdlike cloaca, rather than separate genitals and anus. Others—like the head coaches agreeing to drop football entirely and instead play the Basque racket sport jai alai—have far greater ramifications that we are just beginning to understand.” Liu went on to confirm that despite the infinite fissures in reality, his team could not detect a single multiverse in which Jawaan Taylor played a respectable game.

The post Super Bowl Coin Toss Fractures World Into Infinite Multiverses Where Eagles Win, Lose, Earth Explodes appeared first on The Onion.

10 Feb 04:02

Trump Asks Which One The Ball

by The Onion Staff

The post Trump Asks Which One The Ball appeared first on The Onion.

10 Feb 04:01

Secret Service Agent Starstruck After Seeing Taylor Swift’s Bodyguards

by The Onion Staff

NEW ORLEANS—Expressing awe as they watched the personal security superstars’ approach, Secret Service agent Neil DeLisle, 34, was reportedly starstruck at the Super Bowl on Sunday after he saw Taylor Swift’s bodyguards. “Holy cow—those guys are legit,” said DeLisle, who jumped up and down and excitedly clasped the wrist of a fellow Secret Service agent as the pop star’s massive bodyguards strode by the presidential security detail in the suite-level hallway. “What they do is incredible. Seriously. I wish I were qualified to do something so important. They’re my idols. I never thought I would see them in person. Drew! Can you hear me? Hey, hey! Drew! I love you! You’re my hero!” At press time, sources confirmed DeLisle and the other Secret Service agents had returned from getting their jackets autographed and realized they had completely lost sight of the president.

The post Secret Service Agent Starstruck After Seeing Taylor Swift’s Bodyguards appeared first on The Onion.

10 Feb 04:01

Fox Bleeps Out Entire Kendrick Lamar Performance

by The Onion Staff

NEW ORLEANS—In an effort to comply with FCC regulations and provide “family-friendly entertainment” for viewers, Fox reportedly opted Sunday to bleep out Kendrick Lamar’s entire Super Bowl halftime show. “Our decision to mute all of Mr. Lamar’s lyrics was prompted by their incendiary subject matter, which we determined was unbefitting of our broadcast,” said Fox spokesperson Jeremy Locklear, explaining that the network did not feel a single second of the Pulitzer Prize–winning artist’s music was appropriate to air. “We owe it to our audience to protect them from any content they might find distasteful, which is why we also aired pixelated video of the performance from beginning to end, ensuring no one would see anything that was happening on the stage. While it may have caused some confusion among viewers who attempted to turn up the volume or alter their TV settings, we ultimately stand by our decision.” According to reports, Fox censors successfully muted Lamar’s microphone, but they were unable to avoid broadcasting the sound of 75,000 shouting fans in the Superdome calling Drake a “certified pedophile.”

The post Fox Bleeps Out Entire Kendrick Lamar Performance appeared first on The Onion.

10 Feb 04:01

Super Bowl Party Guest Brings Something Called ‘Ham Plinkies’

by The Onion Staff
10 Feb 04:00

Trump Regales Jackson Mahomes With Tales Of His Old Groping Days

by The Onion Staff

NEW ORLEANS—Claiming that he was unstoppable back in the 1980s, President Donald Trump reportedly grew sentimental Sunday during the Super Bowl while regaling social media influencer Jackson Mahomes with tales of his old groping days. “These young kids act like they can grope, but us old dogs really knew how to fondle,” said Trump, describing the physical and mental attributes—such as powerful fingers and a never-give-up attitude—that made him a natural at feeling women up against their will. “Under those streetlights outside a Manhattan club on a fall night, I was king. My arm was a cannon—ask any woman in therapy, they’ll tell you. I could have been the best of all time, but I injured my wrist on a D cup. Then arthritis set in, and a truly golden age came to an end. Ah, those were the days. I used to be so elusive. No cop could catch me. But you know what I remember most? Not the pleas to get off them, the cries for help, or the bitter sting of mace. No, it’s the feeling of a breast I never asked to touch.” Trump added that while the social media star didn’t hold a candle to him, he’d seen the felony charges against the young Mahomes and believed he had a lot of potential.

The post Trump Regales Jackson Mahomes With Tales Of His Old Groping Days appeared first on The Onion.

10 Feb 01:27

(do not) follow the white rabbit

(do not) follow the white rabbit

run

[img]:sonnsc

run (9front)

Cirno with an AK-47 holding Glenda in her other arm. At the ruins of Bell Temple.

https://analognowhere.com/_/sonnsc

10 Feb 01:24

Part 1.49

Part 1.49
09 Feb 21:19

Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Strong

by Zach Weinersmith


Click here to go see the bonus panel!

Hovertext:
Blistering Cheeks of Christ is copyright Zach Weinersmith, all rights reserved.


Today's News:
09 Feb 16:16

NFL Confirms Players Will Still Wear ‘Fight Bigotry’ Jockstraps

by The Onion Staff

NEW ORLEANS—Insisting their opposition to all forms of prejudice had not changed despite recent events, the NFL confirmed Sunday that players would still wear their “Fight Bigotry” jockstraps at the Super Bowl. “Trust us, when you tune into tonight’s game, the groins of players will continue to proudly represent the ongoing battle against systemic racism,” said NFL spokesperson Anthony Cameron, assuring the public that the unifying message would remain visible in bold text on the pouch cradling and protecting the genitals of those on the field. “Make no mistake, encircling our players’ testicles is an enduring commitment to ending hatred of every sort. That’s especially true for the back straps supporting their ass cheeks, where our slogan ‘Choose Love’ is on full display.” Cameron added that the league would allow players who objected to the straps on political grounds to instead wear official NFL athletic supporters covered in pink hearts and bearing the words “Hot Stuff.”

The post NFL Confirms Players Will Still Wear ‘Fight Bigotry’ Jockstraps appeared first on The Onion.

08 Feb 18:02

Texas reports new measles outbreak in West Texas

by By Pavan Acharya
The outbreak in Gaines County, with a population of about 22,000, has grown since two cases were reported in January. All those who contracted measles were unvaccinated, health officials said.
08 Feb 18:01

Houston’s BIPOC Arts Network & Fund Grants $500,000 to Local Artists

by Jessica Fuentes

The BIPOC Arts Network & Fund (BANF) has awarded 25 Houston-area artists with $20,000 grants and an 18-month professional development opportunity.

When it was first established in 2021, BANF contributed more than $2 million into BIPOC-founded and led organizations. In 2024/2025, with support from the Ford Foundation’s America’s Cultural Treasures initiative, the organization is investing $5 million into arts organizations in communities of color. Additionally, BANF provides grants directly to artists. 

The 2025 awards are a part of the organization’s Artist Award initiative, which was launched in 2023 and ultimately provides $20,000 grants to 50 artists. The first 25 artists were announced in June 2023, and included Ayanna Jolivet Mccloud, Eepi Chaad, Harrison Guy, and others.

A group photo of the BANF 2025 Artist Award grantees.

BANF 2025 Artist Award Grantees

This year’s recipients are: Anthony J. Suber, Byron Canady, Claudia Cepeda, Deborah D.E.E.P. Mouton, Ibraim Nascimento, Jamie Rivers, Jorge Garza, Julia Barbosa Landois, Luana Meireles Da Silva, Marissa Castillo, Mikaela Selley, Mo Nikole, Phillip Pyle, II, Rachel H. Dickson, Reyes Ramirez, Ruby Rivera, ShaWanna Renee Rivon, Sierra Sankofa, Sneha Bhavsar, Sofia Silueta, Sonny Mehta, Stalina Emmanuelle Villarreal, Theresa R. Escobedo, Will North, and YUNGCHRIS.

In a press release, Sixto Wagan, Executive Director of BANF, said, “These awards are more than a recognition — they are an investment in the future of Houston’s cultural landscape. The 2025 Artist Awards celebrate the exceptional talent and dedication of BIPOC artists who prioritize community thriving over individual accolades.”

He continued, “Through their artistic excellence, community leadership, and commitment to learning and sharing, they embody the spirit of a thriving and connected arts ecosystem. This initiative is about fostering creativity that builds from a shared heritage and catalyzes a shared abundant future.”

Read biographies for each of the 2025 awardees via the BANF website.

The post Houston’s BIPOC Arts Network & Fund Grants $500,000 to Local Artists appeared first on Glasstire.

08 Feb 18:01

A Monument Project in Tumultuous Times

by Jessica Fuentes

On Saturday, February 1, the first day of Black History Month, a new public art piece was dedicated in Fort Worth. As its title suggests, East Rosedale Monument Project, by Christopher Blay, is more than a sculpture; it evokes the Mellon Foundation’s The Monuments Projects, a multi-year initiative aiming to tell a “more complete and inclusive” story of the U.S. The program was launched in 2020, when more public awareness was brought to issues around monuments across the country, many of which offer incomplete, and sometimes unreliable, information, and as a whole do not reflect the diverse experiences and histories of our country.

Eight years in the making, Blay’s piece is layered. The transformed vintage transit bus speaks to the significance and history of buses in the Civil Rights movement nationally, while also incorporating local narratives and voices. The work is positioned on a brick path between the sidewalk and East Rosedale Street in Southeast Fort Worth. It is down the street from a bus stop and across the street from Evans Avenue Plaza, a historical landmark filled with plaques honoring important leaders in the city’s Southside, a historically Black neighborhood. 

A photograph of a public art work by Christopher Blay.

Christopher Blay, “East Rosedale Monument Project,” 2024

From the sidewalk, the metal bus features stripes of red, yellow, and orange, and silhouettes are painted onto the metal mesh that has replaced the windows. The shadowed figures feature profiles of young people involved in KEEN (Kids Environmental Education Network) Group, a program that enriches the neighborhood with environmental education, healthy activities, and arts programming. One aspect of KEEN’s programming is photography, and as an artist who got his start in photography, Blay had worked with the organization before and was eager to involve their students in this project.

There are many touchpoints with this project that resonate deeply with Blay. Growing up in Houston, the artist moved to Fort Worth in 1989 as a young adult seeking to strike out on his own. As a student at Tarrant County Junior College (now Tarrant County College), Blay assisted his professor, Peter Feresten, with a documentation project for the Lenora Rolla Heritage Center in the organization’s early days. 

Feresten, whose photographs are part of the Amon Carter Museum of American Art’s collection, had been embedded in the Southside neighborhood since the mid-1970s, photographing church services, Juneteenth celebrations, music performances, portraits, and more. Later, Blay would get to know the community better through a photojournalism series he embarked on when he served as Assistant Photo Editor of the Star Telegram. 

When Fort Worth Public Art announced the call for proposals for a public art piece on East Rosedale, Blay was excited to apply. Through his knowledge and experience of the area, he felt connected to the community and had a desire to create a lasting work of art that could speak to the neighborhood’s legacy. Blay, who recently was appointed as the Director of Public Programs at the National Juneteenth Museum in Fort Worth, told me that he was notified that he was a finalist for the public art piece on Juneteenth, 2014.

Public art can be a long process; it necessarily involves collaboration at every level. When done well, the end result is more than a physical work of art, it brings a community together in celebration. Aside from working with the KEEN students, Blay told me, “Bob Ray Sanders [a local journalist and Civil Rights leader], Brenda Sanders-Wise [the Executive Director of the Tarrant County Black Historical & Genealogical Society which is housed in the Lenora Rolla Center], Estella Williams [president of the NAACP’s Fort Worth/Tarrant County branch], Sarah Walker [Board President of the TCBHGS], and Johnny Lewis and Linda Cameron of the KEEN Group were advisors, storytellers, fact-checkers, and friends of this project from its inception.” 

The dedication ceremony for Blay’s East Rosedale Monument Project was perhaps one of the best-attended public art events in Fort Worth. Local artists, arts professionals, and community leaders and members showed up to revel in the piece and its significance.

A photograph of the interior of a public art piece by Christopher Blay.

Christopher Blay, “East Rosedale Monument Project,” 2024

Visitors to the structure can walk through cutouts of the bus or around it to view the other side. From the street, it is clear that the bus is just a shell and that the seats have been removed. Viewers can walk inside to see panels with photographs and text that speak about the Montgomery Bus Boycott, the history of Freedom Riders, and how buses played a role in the desegregation of schools. One section of text specifically addresses how inadequate busing played a part in revealing the inherent problems of the “separate but equal” clause, and includes a historic photograph of Black students who were the first to integrate Mansfield High School in 1956. Other panels speak to Civil Rights demonstrations in Fort Worth in 1965 and highlight local leaders like Opal Lee, who is known as “The Grandmother of Juneteenth” for her efforts to make the date a national holiday.

Words move across a digital sign hung inside of the structure. Like the silhouettes of local youth, this text highlights young people’s role in advocating for the future they deserve and memorializing the past that holds rich histories of resistance and beauty. Blay invited April Pelton, the 2023 Tarrant County Youth Poet Laureate, to compose a poem for the installation. Her writing is a love letter to the community. It reads:

My Southside, Our Community

A place abounding in love,
From the people around us to the skies above.
Where the smell of soul fills your nose,
And goodness are the seeds we sow.

This one street is connected,
Many others beautifully intersected.
For the community here is proud and bold
With inspiring stories deserving to be told.

In a tumultuous time when division is rampant and recent executive orders question the very idea of a democratic government of the people, by the people, and for the people, Blay’s newest public artwork reminds viewers of the history of resistance and resilience. It stands as a monument to the necessity of community organizing, persistence, placekeeping, and bearing witness to history.

Author’s Note: Since October 2024 I have served on the Fort Worth Art Commission, which provides guidance for Fort Worth Public Art. However, Christopher Blay’s piece was approved nearly a decade ago and completed in June 2024.

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08 Feb 18:00

Tampax encourages women to channel their rage into bigger, better periods

by Ian MacIntyre

LOS ANGELES – With Donald Trump’s second presidential term underway, feminine hygiene brand Tampax has unveiled a bold new marketing strategy encouraging women to harness the sense of anger, disbelief and grief into having the greatest periods the world has ever seen. “Listen, we’re all hurting,” a voiceover in a new TV spot tells viewers. […]

The post Tampax encourages women to channel their rage into bigger, better periods appeared first on The Beaverton.

08 Feb 16:21

National Institutes of Health radically cuts support to universities

by John Timmer

Grants paid by the federal government have two components. One covers the direct costs of performing the research, paying for salaries, equipment, and consumables like chemicals or enzymes. But the government also pays what are called indirect costs. These go to the universities and research institutes, covering the costs of providing and maintaining the lab space, heat and electricity, administrative and HR functions, and more.

These indirect costs are negotiated with each research institution and average close to 30 percent of the amount awarded for the research. Some institutions see indirect rates as high as half the value of the grant.

On Friday, the National Institutes of Health (NIH) announced that negotiated rates were ending. Every existing grant, and all those funded in the future, will see the indirect cost rate set to just 15 percent. With no warning and no time to adjust to the change in policy, this will prove catastrophic for the budget of nearly every biomedical research institution.

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