Erin H

It's a mistake that could happen to anyone — anyone who can't read or is not paying attention while shopping in the produce aisle. A man purchased what he believed to be cubed cheese only to find he bought diced butternut squash. His frustration upon finding squash instead of cheese is a universal sentiment that can be felt by cheese-lovers around the world.

The shopper took his fight to the supermarket to get his return. Witnessing the quest is bystander James Dator, who chronicled the event on Twitter, only for it to go viral.

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(Image credit: TLC)

Big news, Trading Spaces fans: TLC just confirmed that longtime host Paige Davis will return for the 2018 reboot of the popular home makeover show.

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After the first one smashed box office records into smithereens, Warner Bros. has confirmed that Wonder Woman 2 will indeed be a reality, releasing the news today at San Diego’s Comic-Con.

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Divination pieces cast from teeth.  A couple folks’ aesthetic, I think. 

@euripidesredux @goodbyeomelas

Hey, good afternoon, hello, it’s summer, and that means you’re this close to shoving off and wandering straight towards the wine shop or your fridge to get a glass—fuck it, the bottle—of rosé and settle in. You love it! You can’t get enough of it! If it gushed out of the fucking faucets in the bathroom instead of…

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Danny Trejo is in my hometown as the grand marshal for the yearly biker rally and I’m loving it.

(Also, I found out the bands for the rally this year are Jackyl, Molly Hatchet and Great White. YES.)

In Tuesday night’s Dirt Bag, you learned that Kim Kardashian was in something resembling hot water (perfectly drawn bath water?) after people noticed what looked like two lines of cocaine in the background of one of her Snapchats. Because she doesn’t “play with rumors” like that, Kardashian immediately explained away…

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Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson has said in the past that he would consider running for president in 2020, either for attention or because we live in a world where anything is possible in the absolutely worst sense of that phrase. Now one super fan is pushing him another step forward.

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(Image credit: HGTV)

From Apartment Therapy → 7 Clever Ways to Organize Tupperware and Food Storage Containers

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When Kesha releases her new album Rainbow on August 11th, she'll do so with help from one of country's most influential artists: Dolly Parton. The singer makes a guest appearance on Kesha's record, singing on "Old Flames (Can't Hold a Candle to You)."

Pebe Sebert – Kesha's mother – wrote the song, which was a Number One for Parton and appeared on 1980's Dolly, Dolly, Dolly

This article originally appeared on www.rollingstone.com: Dolly Parton to Sing on Kesha's New Album 'Rainbow'

Shania Twain has announced the track list for her comeback album Now. The Nineties country game-changer took to Instagram to post a short video revealing the 16 songs that make up her new LP, set to be released September 29th. "Feels so great to share with you the full tracklisting for my new album

This article originally appeared on www.rollingstone.com: Shania Twain Reveals New Album Track List

Mayor Rahm Emanuel has made Chicago Public Schools the first big-city system to require a job, a college acceptance letter, gap-year program enrollment or enlistment in the military as a condition of graduating from high school. Aside from the obvious issues with the school system potentially withholding a diploma…

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Crystal Gayle had her first hit single, "I've Cried (The Blue Right Out of My Eyes)," in 1970, but it would be six years before she topped the country chart with "I'll Get Over You" – and seven years till she released what would become her signature, "Don't It Make My Brown Eyes Blue." Forty years ago this week, on June 24th, 1977, "Brown Eyes" was the first single released from

This article originally appeared on www.rollingstone.com: Flashback: Crystal Gayle's 'Brown Eyes Blue' Goes Global

BREAKING NEWS THAT IS BREAKING! Prince Jared Kushner of the Trump-Kushners was allowed to open his mouth and emit sounds on Monday morning! It was … well, let us put it this way. Are you familiar with his sexxxy abs, the hotness of which we chronicled (WITH SHAME) back in December? The peeps what come from his face hole do not match those abs.

Have a listen:

He speaks! Have you ever heard Jared Kushner’s voice before? Here you go. pic.twitter.com/QKElf1bynn

— Bradd Jaffy (@BraddJaffy) June 19, 2017

OK, so he is talking about “data centers” and the “cloud,” or maybe he is talking about brokering peace in the Middle East (on his agenda this week!) or going to jail (possibly on his agenda soon!), but that is not the point. Is his voice everything you thought it would be? Does it feature dulcet tones that woo you like a common Ivanka? Do you feel like maybe he is saying con man words, to con you? The beauty of Jared’s voice is indeed in the eye of the beholder.

Just kidding, it is kind of a let down. He has a strong New York accent, which makes sense, due to being from a New York family. But we expected him to be more whispery. And higher pitched. We’re not saying we expected him to sound like a cuck (you do NOT call Jared a cuck). We just thought his voice would be a little sweeter and harder to understand.

We always figured a common conversation between Jared Kushner and a random human would go like this:

JARED: mumblewhispermumblewhisper.

HUMAN: What?

JARED: mumblemumbleMUMBLEwhisperwhisper

HUMAN: Excuse me?????

JARED: [gives the human butterfly kisses with his fluttering eyelashes]

HUMAN: Stop that!

JARED: I’m going to evict your entire family.

Wonkette is aware of Jared Kushner speaking FOUR other times in his life. He was a very important character in this video about how he bought some buildings from the Jehovah’s Witnesses. He’s a little bit looser here, but he’s still all Business Time, so it is very ZZZZZ:

Another link available on YouTube shows Jared talking for eight or nine minutes about real estate development in Brooklyn, and he is EXCITED! Or rather he’s as excited as one can get when talking about building office space:

A third time Jared opened his mouth and created vowel and consonant sounds was very recently. The CBS “This Morning” show was taping at the White House, and in the course of interviewing Ivanka, Gayle King and the other hosts spotted Jared hiding behind a curtain. Everybody was like “COME OUT COME OUT WHEREVER YOU ARE!” and Jared was like “pitter patter pitter patter” and the hosts were like “SPEAK, DIMPLE BUTT!” and he was like “squeak!” It was much more in line with what we expect out of him:

Finally, Jared is occasionally allowed to speak in videos on Ivanka’s Instagram. Here is one where he sounds TOTALLY NORMAL, because he is feeding his baby. He says things like “Here you go” and “Try this, it’s very yummy!” and “You like that?” He sounds like a regular person, with feelings and everything!

The whole family feeding Theodore his first ever spoonfuls of food–apple sauce! I cannot believe how big he is getting! #Milestone #solids

A post shared by Ivanka Trump (@ivankatrump) on Sep 18, 2016 at 4:40pm PDT

In conclusion, Jared Kushner possesses a voice, and he will say words whenever the fuck he wants, because you are not his real dad, OK? His real dad is a criminal, and that has literally nothing to do with the point of this post. We just like mentioning it all the time but especially in this, your OPEN THREAD.

Wonkette is fully funded by readers like you, because we ain’t got no ads. If you love us, click below to fund us!

(Image credit: The Colossal Shop)

In the event that you have a whole lot of time on your hands, consider stimulating your neurons with this massive 5,000-piece CYMK puzzle. Created by German designer and illustrator Clemens Habitcht, this complex puzzle is the larger, decidedly more challenging relative of the 1,000-piece game he released in 2014.

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