Burly.Thurr

In 2008, I was invited to join the School of Visual Arts (SVA) to invent and chair the MFA Interaction Design program. Since, I’ve continued a fairly active career as a consultant outside the school. Most chairs of academic departments at SVA have outside projects and careers; it’s encouraged as it supports the College’s mission to integrate academia with the profession.

Announcing that I’ve accepted a position as creative director for NPR, commencing January 2014, thereby ending my consulting career. I’ll continue to chair the MFA Interaction Design program in NYC, and be in DC on a regular basis, as well as maintain an active remote-working relationship.

Over the years I’ve worked on digital products and services, I’ve been fortunate to learn many things, but one thing above all: work only on what you love. Make time for ideas you care about; fight hard (and diplomatically, of course) for things you believe in; follow the people who matter to you; make time for projects you want to see in the world; take risks for what matters; be happy with your work. Do that one thing, and everything else falls into place.

NPR has been a critical and meaningful part of my life since … well … forever. In my new role, I’ll work in the digital media team, overseeing and guiding both the visual and user experience across all NPR-branded digital platforms and content. From NPR.org to news apps to multimedia reports, I’ll work with teams to ensure that NPR presents an experience on par with the excellence of its content. I’ll support NPR as we consider new standards in design and storytelling. I’ll be building a team, hiring an all-star group to join the already phenomenal team.

I look forward to beginning.

Paramount

Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues is chock full of celebrity cameos, even moreso than the first one. How good are they? We'll rank them for you.  If you want to be completely surprised—and have somehow missed the fact that some of these were happening—we'd recommend not reading further. 

Many of the cameos in the movie occur during its final-act battle scene between various news teams, a callback to a similar cameo-jammed set piece in the first movie. But whereas the actors playing members of competing news teams in the first movie were mainly from the world of comedy, director Adam McKay and his crew got a more diverse bunch of celebrities to participate this time around. 

(Note: we have chosen to exclude the likes of Greg Kinnear and Kristen Wiig, who appear in this movie, but whose parts are too big to be considered truly cameos.) 

15. Vince Vaughn: Vaughn is back as rival anchor Wes Mantooth. We all knew this was coming. Moving on. 

14. Sacha Baron Cohen: Unless he can make up for The Dictator, his presence is really not welcome anywhere, even as an employee of the BBC. 

12-13. Jim Carrey/Will Smith: Carrey and Smith just don't make much of an impact as the representatives of a Canadian news team and ESPN, respectively. They are just there for star power. 

11. Fran Lebowitz: Wait, no, sorry, this was in The Wolf of Wall Street. 

10. Paula Pell: The SNL/30 Rock alumna screenwriter is underrated in almost everything. She's also underrated on this list, but unfortunately, her screaming woman who is very upset when Ron suffers an ice skating mishap doesn't register quite enough to be higher. 

9. Liam Neeson: It's nice to see something wherein Liam Neeson isn't scowling or chasing after someone who's been kidnapped. Still, that's not enough to get his History Channel anchor better placement on this list. 

8. Kirsten Dunst: Having read her emails, we're pretty sure Kiki is a goddess, so this cameo (as an actual goddess) is significant. 

7. John C. Reilly: Reilly—basically one of the Ferrell/McKay crew—wouldn't rank so high if he weren't playing the ghost of Stonewall Jackson, who for some reason participates alongside the History Channel in the battle. But he is. 

6. Amy Poehler and Tina Fey: Your Golden Globes co-hosts play members of an entertainment news team. They didn't do anything special, they are just Amy and Tina, being awesome. 

5. Will Ferrell's kids: They do an unsurprisingly great job heckling their dad as Burgundy during an early scene. It's not an obvious cameo which makes it all the better. "They had begged," Ferrell said over the weekend. 

4. Harrison Ford: With what amounts to a small role moreso than a cameo, Ford is more animated here than he was for the entirety of Ender's Game. We'll therefore give him the benefit of the doubt, despite the fact that he already played the role of a cranky news veteran in Morning Glory. 

3. Kanye West: Kanye actually dedicates himself to this thing—he's representing MTV in the anchor battle—and seems to enjoy it. For sheer and unexpected commitment, Kanye ranks highly. 

2. Drake: Drake apparently really wanted to be in this movie and ended up getting the first line. "His agent, for the last year, was calling saying, 'Hey, Drake's in concert if you want to go,'" McKay said at the junket this past weekend. "I am like 'I've got two kids, I'm not going to go to a Drake show.' Finally, towards the end, the agent's like, 'Is there anything he could do?' I'm like 'I'm sorry we don't have any roles we have a one line part but he wouldn't want to do that.' They were like, 'He'll do it." Drake's many years of acting on Degrassi: The Next Generation really helped him out here. Plus, points for persistence.  

1. Marion Cotillard: Somehow, Marion Cotillard's presence in this film was the most surprising cameo. "I think she did ask," McKay said. "I think her agent actually said she'd do something." An Oscar winner very much not known for comedy hamming it up as the French-speaking anchor for a Canadian news team? Sign us up. Let's build a spinoff around her. 

 

The first trailer for Mitt, the Netflix documentary portraying the 2012 campaign from the perspective of Mitt Romney, was released on Wednesday morning. It does not appear to be uplifting. It opens with the grim-faced Romney family sitting in a hotel room as one of Romney's sons says, "I just can't believe you're going to lose." "Yeah," Romney says. "So what do you think you say in a concession speech?" he asks. (Romney famously didn't write one before election night.) "By the way, does someone have a number for the president?" Someone did.

Granted, it's probably hard to make an upbeat, fun movie about how a man's life-long dreams were dashed over the course of 12 months. But the trailer is unrelentingly bleak. It walks through typical campaign moments — you see Romney preparing for debates, emerging from his campaign plane into a cheering crowd, having been introduced as the "next president" of the United States — but with Romney's signature awkwardness. You actually see the moment he realizes that he's lost. And there's the behind-the-scenes stuff, like Mitt ironing his suit cuff as he's still wearing it for some reason. Ann Romney tells the camera, "I don't think I can do this anymore."

Again, this looks like the best of the recent crop of 2012-inspired entertainment. It comes out on January 24, probably intentionally waiting until after America has recovered from its wave of holiday-inspired depression.

The Food and Drug Administration proposed a new rule today that would require manufacturers behind products like Cetaphil, Dial, and Softsoap to prove that antibacterial soaps are safe for long-term daily use, and that they more effectively prevent illness and the spread of infection than their non-antibacterial counterparts. Because right now, they probably don't.

According to the FDA, there's reason to believe that antibacterial soaps and body washes don't work any better than regular soap — and could actually be harmful to users: 

Although consumers generally view [antibacterial] products as effective tools to help prevent the spread of germs, there is currently no evidence that they are any more effective at preventing illness than washing with plain soap and water. Further, some data suggest that long-term exposure to certain active ingredients used in antibacterial products - for example, triclosan (liquid soaps) and triclocarban (bar soaps) - could pose health risks, such as bacterial resistance or hormonal effects.

Under the new rule, soap makers would have to provide clinical studies and other proof to the FDA showing the preventative-health advantages of antibacterial soap in order to keep marketing the products. The FDA notes in their statement that alcohol-based hand sanitizers remain a good alternative to soap and water. The FDA is inviting "consumers, clinicians, environmental groups, scientists, industry representatives and others" to weigh in on the rule during a comment period, which will last for more than 180 day. The rule should be finalized by 2016. 

According to the Associated Press, the FDA first began evaluating triclosan and other similar ingredients more than 40 years ago, and has been pressured recently to rein in use of the antibacterial. NBC reports: 

Environmental groups and some members of Congress, such as Massachusetts Democrat Edward Markey, have been calling for limits on the use of triclosan. The National Resources Defense Council (NRDC) sued and the FDA agreed last month to do something about triclosan by 2016. “It’s outrageous that FDA has waited 35 years to protect the public from this harmful chemical. This final rule should prohibit triclosan from use in soaps,” Mae Wu, a lawyer for NRDC’s health program, said in November.

Last week, the FDA issued guidelines to reduce use of antibacterials as a growth enhancer for livestock in an effort to combat increasing human resistance to antibiotics. The FDA's proposal also follows its decision to block 23andMe from selling DIY genetics test kits. The company has since pulled the product. 

Organization Summary:
Minnesota Food Association (MFA) is a nonprofit organization operating out of the St. Croix River Valley and the Twin Cities metro area of Minnesota whose mission is to build a more sustainable food system. We seek to impact local food production, grow more sustainable food producers, and enhance their connections to markets and resources. MFA's Big River Farms Program operates an immigrant and minority farmer training program together with a Community Supported Agriculture (CSA) and wholesale distribution service. We provide farmers with the skills and knowledge to operate their own viable organic and sustainable vegetable farms, while providing fresh, organic produce to local consumers by the farmers-in-training.

Primary Duties:
MFA is seeking an Executive Director who will: • lead the organization, ensuring the organization's ability to create a sustainable food system. • make certain the organizational goals are accomplished and programs are managed effectively. • increase awareness, and the financial viability, of MFA and Big River Farms. Primary Responsibilities 1. Lead the organization a. Be accountable to the Board of Directors for all aspects of administration and operation of MFA and Big River Farms b. Lead (and/or participate in conjunction with the board) in creating and developing the vision and strategic direction of the organization c. Participate and support board committees and task forces d. Ensure that organizational systems, goals, and practices further the corporate vision e. Manage financial, physical, and human resources to meet program goals f. Ensure the financial stability and accountability of the organization through budget development and accounting system management g. Lead staff, delegate, and maintain a culture that empowers staff; fosters collaboration among staff, stakeholders, and community; and promotes MFA's values and mission 2. Ensure organizational goals are accomplished a. Prioritize and allocate financial and human resources to meet annual goals and ongoing performance expectations b. Recruit, manage, and develop staff c. Hold self and others accountable for reaching organizational goals 3. Strategize and implement a strong resource development plan, including individual donors, private foundations, and government funding a. Maintain and expand the donor base and relationships with private and government donors b. Write and submit grant proposals and required reports to donors c. Provide oversight to donor development programs and events d. secure additional funding from new sources and lead efforts to diversify sources of revenue 4. Increase awareness of MFA and develop community partners a. Build collaborative relationships with other nonprofits, government, businesses, and the community to build awareness and support of MFA programs b. Represent and promote MFA at community and industry events c. Develop and expand relationships with immigrant associations and communities d. Oversee public relations and marketing programs and support appropriate public policy efforts relevant to MFA's mission e. Participate in Immigrant and Minority Farmers Conference, Dinner on the Farm, and other events

Experience:
- Significant and proven leadership skills developed through several years in senior management positions. - Excellent organizational development, interpersonal, marketing, communication, administration, and personnel management skills essential. - Experience in the nonprofit sector, agricultural background, and knowledge of and experience in organic farming preferred. - Experience working with immigrant populations and community engagement. - Strong interpersonal skills and public speaking experience preferred. - Demonstrated success managing staff, budgets, and programs; prior experience as an Executive Director, or similar role, preferred. - Accounting, marketing, and fundraising experience. - Masters degree preferred.

To Apply:
For full posting and directions to apply, click here.

In 1979, I sucked up a crucifix. Schlawapffk is the sound it makes, FYI, when the special gift of a First Communion necklace disappears into the head of a 1970 Electrolux Deluxe Automatic 1205 vacuum.

It was an unassuming piece of jewelry, the kind that decorates not dictates Catholicism. Its delicate 14-karat gold choker nearly invisible, letting the cross pendant do its thing.

But then it happened. In a moment of what I would like to remember as devout responsibility, but was in fact a young me rocking out to a boombox while vacuuming my pink shag bedroom carpet, I knocked it off the dresser. And in one fell swish of wand and nozzle, all was lost.

It took me years to get up the courage to tell my parents about that necklace. What would they think of me if they knew? Just like it took me years to tell them that our hamster didn’t just die a natural death, but fell to her death one morning when I was trying to give her a hug before school. Et cetera.

What if they found out I wasn’t perfect? What if they knew I’d lost myself in music so deeply that I got carried away? If they knew I’d loved an animal so immensely that I wanted to be close to her. What then?

And henceforth imperfect aversion began. Better if I kept these things, and all, to myself.

Imperfection protection is a training regimen that requires constant attention. Let your guard down (fall in love, get lost, be in awe, get distracted) and your guard is down, susceptible to attack. Even after years of practice, pruning, trimming, training, the armor is vulnerable. The typos slip through. The hem shows. The human is.

More years and many regimens later, I can confidently say I’ve lived the most imperfect year on record. 2013 was a year of loss and tragedy. But it was also a year of honesty. Of saying what is. And of owning up to not being perfect.

Of course, much sooner than 2013, my family learned of the necklace, the hamster. What came of it wasn’t nearly what I had expected, but instead support and a profound connection.

Like the things we intend to be, but never are quite that, the things we do, but never fall quite right, these systems are ever in motion. And the key is not to focus on what is, but to be a participant in the exploration of change. The what that is in motion. To be present through transformation.

Imperfection is a constant. Look and listen for it, as it usually means you’re getting close to perfect.

This thought was first published by The Pastry Box Project

AP

On Tuesday, America had a collective red-faced meltdown after President Obama was spotted on camera shaking hands with Cuban leader Raul Castro. But the baby steps towards turning America into a communist paradise had already begun. 

The Daily Beast's Eli Lake reports the Obama administration has engaged in "midlevel discussions" with Cuba over the last six months. “The Cubans regularly say to people that they are ready for a different relationship,” Dan Restrepo, the former head of Latin America policy on Obama's first term National Security Council, told Lake. Right now that relationship is obviously not going well. 

A lot of the attention inside those discussions focused on the release of Alan Gross, a 64-year-old American subcontractor detained in Cuba since 2009 and accused of being a spy. The Cuban government offered Gross's release in exchange for four Cubans convicted of espionage in the U.S. in 2001. The U.S. has so far refused to take that deal. 

But, still, Lake thinks the midlevel talks and the handshake seen 'round the world could lead to the infamous "something more." Jon Stewart didn't think the handshake meant much, but what does he know? Let's not forget the nuclear deal with Iran started with a chalice and a telephone call. A handshake in public? Gosh, Cuba and the U.S. are practically dating. 

The relationship between Cuba and the U.S. has been fractured for over fifty years. But in April, Beyonce and Jay-Z travelled to the country for their fifth anniversary a government-approved "educational exchange," setting off a storm of controversy in Congress and the Senate, proving maybe some aren't ready for a step forward. But, wait, April was roughly six months ago. Jay-Z is a member of the Illuminati, and friends with Obama, could he secretly be our lead Cuban diplomat, too?

No, not possible. Right? 

The Archdiocese of St. Paul and Minneapolis released the list of priests it says have been involved in sexual abuse over the last 60 years. Madeleine Baran and Laura Yuen of MPR say: “The archdiocese also released the names of four other priests who had been included on an earlier list, but church officials now say those four should not have been included. A Ramsey County judge ordered the archdiocese Monday to release a list of 33 priests that had been sealed since 2009. Seven of the priests named today were not previously known to the public as accused abusers. Five of those seven are still living. Others, such as the Rev. Robert Kapoun, are already well known through lawsuits and media coverage. About one-third of the priests on the list are dead. … Attorneys for victims of clergy sexual abuse have argued for years that the public is at risk as long as the names of abusers remain secret. ... It's unclear how law enforcement agencies will respond to the release of the list, if at all.”

More on that fat budget surplus … Rachel Stassen-Berger of the Strib writes: “Gov. Mark Dayton said that he will not make any final decisions until he sees an updated forecast next year but if the state has extra money, he wants to cut new business to business taxes and give the middle class a tax break. … House Speaker Paul Thissen, asked about Dayton's idea of tax cuts if the surplus holds, says ‘we have to look at the whole totality’ of the choices in front of us. Thissen, DFL-Minneapolis, said the DFL controlled House will consider the tax cut proposals but did not immediately embrace the idea. … Dayton says he would only follow through with his tax cut proposal if the state has a surplus in the forecast that will come out in February. Budget forecasts tend to shift significantly between those two economic predictions.”

At the PiPress, Bill Salisbury writes: “Scrapping the new taxes on business equipment repairs, warehousing services and equipment purchases by telecommunications providers would reduce state revenue by $232 million during the current biennium, according to a Revenue Department estimate. A lobbying campaign is under way to use some of the surplus to provide raises to personal care attendants for people with physical and mental disabilities. A 5 percent raise some caregivers are seeking would cost $80 million a year, according to the Associated Press. Dayton also has said he would like to relieve financial burdens for college students. When there's extra cash in the state till, legislators typically call for spending more on education. In addition, the governor has said he favors making Minnesota law conforming to the federal income tax code to make filing simpler for state taxpayers.”

MPR’s Tim Pugmire says: “Dayton and the Democratic majorities in the Minnesota House and Senate passed a $2 billion tax increase last session, which they said would help stabilize state finances. But those changes have only been in place since July, and the revenue impact from an income tax increase on top earners won’t show up in state accounting until next year. Republicans contend the tax increases will ultimately have a chilling effect on Minnesota’s economy.” Because we already have all our millionaires living in Yankton.

Brian Bakst at the AP had earlier said: “This is the first forecast since Democrats, who control all parts of state government, passed a budget that increased spending and taxes. Democrats are crossing their fingers that tax projections are hitting — or exceeding — their marks. Republicans will be studying the report closely for signs of fiscal weakness that they would undoubtedly attribute to Democratic policies.” But clearly “tax and spend” has proven ruinous, again.

The latest on the big Downtown East project from the Strib’s Eric Roper: “City officials unveiled more details Thursday behind the massive $400 million development project next to the new Vikings stadium, just over a week before the City Council must approve it. The mayor and developer Ryan Cos. said the deal's 1.1 million square feet of office space represents the largest city office development in 22 years. Wells Fargo's plans to own the property is the largest corporate commitment in city history, they said. The plan also features 400 apartments and about 22,000 square feet of retail. … The largest remaining obstacle appears to be Wells Fargo's insistence on having their bright red and yellow logo atop the office building, prohibited under city ordinance. The Vikings oppose this because of a potential detrimental effect on selling stadium naming rights. An amendment to the city's zoning code would be required for the signage, city staff said Thursday.”

Sketches of the new Saints stadium have been released. MPR’s Curtis Gilbert says: “People passing by the new Saints ballpark in Lowertown will be able to see all the way to the bluffs of the Mississippi River. New renderings released Thursday show what architect Julie Snow called a ‘porous’ open-air concession area. A building housing team offices was also shortened to save money. And as before, the playing field and most of the seats will be located below street level.” Not bad … even if it lacks the luxury corporate boxes and personal seat licenses to make it a true “people’s stadium.” MinnPost coverage here.

In the PiPress, Frederick Melo says: “Julie Snow, the project's lead architect, said it effectively turns the warehouse building inside out, and the open-air playing field will sit in what is presently the building's basement. Home plate and first base will be aligned with Broadway Street, and the height of an administrative building has been reduced to sit below the concourse, allowing Saints officials to keep their offices at the same level as the field itself. The design moves an existing dog park north of the ballpark and closer to Interstate 94, and creates a more visible walking connection to the Bruce Vento Trail, she said.”

Quite the sun dog display this morning. MPR’s Michael Olson has a collection of photos …

Customers who purchased kits as of November 22 can receive a refund as the genetic testing startup works its way out of FDA limbo.

This evening, Anne Wojcicki, CEO and founder of Google-backed genetic testing company 23andMe vowed to cooperate with the FDA, which ordered the company stop marketing its $99 DNA testing kit on Nov. 25. Wojcicki expressed regret but also stood behind the company's mission.

Read Full Story

Punch Pizza ownership gave raises this week to bring pay above $10 an hour for all of its 300 employees, the company said Thursday. Half of those employees were making less than $10 an hour, according to Punch, which has eight Twin Cities locations. Non-managers were making between $7.50 and $17 an hour. The wood-fire pizza chain is also giving raises to bring cooks to at least $13 an hour. In total, 90 percent of employees got raises. The company said the move is not a direct reaction to Thursday's…

2012 was a fine year for Cobbler, the turkey. Cobbler, who was raised in Rockingham County, Virginia, was just 19 weeks old when he was named the National Thanksgiving Turkey, earning himself a pardon from the President of the United States on November 21, 2012.

But Cobbler didn't last long. Just months after the passing of his turkey alternate (all pardoned turkeys have an alternate) Gobbler, Cobbler was euthanized on August 22, 2013. Like every single other turkey pardoned by President Barack Obama, Cobbler and Gobbler are no longer among the living. Only one turkey pardoned by the president has lived to see a second Thanksgiving.

Next week, on the day before Thanksgiving, the president will again pardon a National Thanksgiving Turkey and its alternate, this time from Minnesota. And, if history is precedent, those turkeys have two years left at best. Here the Star Tribune has a look at some possible turkeys that are gonna die soon.

So what's the deal? Is Obama casting death spells on these poor birds? Well, no. At least if his predecessor's luck with turkeys is any guide.

John Stossel wrote about George W. Bush's bad luck with Thanksgiving turkeys for ABC, after Bush made the claim that his two pardoned turkeys would "live out their days" in comfort and care. Stossel did the journalistic heavy-lifting and went to the turkey farm where Bush sent his pardoned turkeys. The Virginia farmer told Stossel that "we usually just find 'em and they're dead."

Like Obama's turkeys, the turkeys pardoned by his predecessors tended to last only a few months.

So, what's wrong with our political turkey class?

A 2010 report for the Human Society detailed the burdens Turkey eugenics have wrought on the birds. Simply put, they are not bred for living, but for eating.

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More from National Journal

• The Senate Just Changed Its Filibuster Rules
• Love It or Hate It, Obamacare Redistributes Americans' Wealth
• The Difference Between Republican and Democratic Brains

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"Farming interests have transformed Ben Franklin's tree-perching 'Bird of Courage' into a flightless gargantua bred to grow so fast that today's commercially raised turkeys," the report's section on turkey obesity. The added weight causes degenerative hip failure and other joint deformities.

In fact, they are so fat, that without human intervention, the domesticated turkey would go extinct. That's because "Turkeys have been bred for such heavy body weight that they are physically incapable of mating, necessitating artificial insemination via tube or syringe."

And like overweight humans, these obese turkeys suffer and die from heart disease. "Sudden death associated with acute heart failure and perirenal hemorrhage bleeding around the kidneys) is a significant cause of mortality for rapidly growing turkey toms," the report states.

Flightless gargantua. No. Delicious flightless gargantua.

Costco has apologized to all of God's creatures for selling Bibles labeled "fiction," chalking it up to a mistake made by a distributor, who, unlike Jesus, was not infallible.

The error wasn't caught until last Friday, when a pastor (who also tweeted that he believes there was a second shooter in the Kennedy assassination) posted a photo of one of the offending Bibles:

Costco has Bibles for sale under the genre of FICTION Hmmmm...... pic.twitter.com/mLZVogkSfd

— Caleb Kaltenbach (@calebwilds) November 15, 2013

Hmmmm indeed! The tweet drew predictable reactions from both sides of the argument and word spread (helped along somewhat by Kaltenbach calling Fox News contributor Todd Starnes to tell him about it), culminating in Kaltenbach having to talk to Elisabeth Hasselbeck in a special Fox & Friends "The Fight for Faith" segment:

In the end, Costco blamed an unnamed distributor, saying in a statement:

Costco’s distributor mislabeled a small percentage of the Bibles; however, we take responsibility and should have caught the mistake. We are correcting this with them for future distribution. We greatly apologize for the error.

And Costco representative Dusty Groves told ABC7:

Our CEO, he's a devout Catholic. He obviously loves the Lord. This isn't something that he is purposely trying to do. It was a mistake.

Hallelujah! All is forgiven:

Just so everyone knows: I'm not outraged, angry, or stunned. I thought the label at Costco on the Bible was interesting

— Caleb Kaltenbach (@calebwilds) November 21, 2013

I believe Costco when they said it was an error. Hopefully God uses this topic to spark conversations on faith & His Word. I'm sure He will

— Caleb Kaltenbach (@calebwilds) November 21, 2013

Incidentally, Kaltenbach was at Costco in the first place to buy a jacket for his wife, since he "wasn't communicating with her in her love language very well."

 

The ongoing scandal surrounding Toronto Mayor Rob Ford reached a surreal peak of heretofore inconceivable proportions yesterday, and even Jon Stewart can't entirely handle it. "Do you have children?" Stewart asked last night's Daily Show audience before airing a clip of Ford crudely referencing cunnilingus during a city council meeting. "You might want to go right now and wake them up and bring them downstairs. And gather them around the television set. It's more important than school."

Things heated up earlier in the week when Ford, who recently admitted he smoked crack "in a drunken stupor," was asked whether he had purchased illegal drugs in the past two years. He responded with an uncomfortable eight-second pause—and then answered in the affirmative. Wondering what was going through the mayor's head during the most bewildering gap of silence in politics since Richard Nixon's eighteen-and-a-half minutes, Stewart reimagined the exchange as a heated game show test:

But none of that compares to what transpired when Ford responded to allegations that he had sexually harassed a female staffer by telling her he wanted to perform oral sex on her. "I would never do that," he insisted. "I'm happily married." And he could have stopped right there. But instead: "I've got more than enough to eat at home."

The single sentence, with the impossibly crude mental images it summons, sent the Daily Show host into a fit of hysterics. "I have an all-you-can-eat buffet at home!" he gasped, mocking the disgraced mayor. "In fact the only thing that gets me through the ridiculous amount of nonstop cunnilingus I have to perform is the sweet relief of crack!"

Then he shared some sage comedic advice. "Mayor Ford of Toronto, let that be your last statement!" he implored. "Throw down the mic! Make that the last sentence of your entire career in public service because that is what we call in my business a closer."

Ford, by the way, has announced no plans to resign.

 

Today only

Over the weekend, two planes full of skydivers crashed into one another some 12,000 feet in the air, yet everyone on board somehow lived. That's a pretty cool story on its own, but since we had no images of the incident, we all had to use our imaginations to picture the skydivers leaping from certain doom to miraculous safety.

Not anymore, however, as some incredible, breath-taking helmet-cam footage of the crash has been released. NBC News reportedly paid over $100,000 for the exclusive video taken directly from the divers themselves. What you'll notice is that one of the planes more or less bellyflopped on the other, after a pair of jumpers had already made their way outside onto the wing. Then there's an explosion and a fiery free fall, for the plane and the parachutists. 

"The sun was just getting ready to set, it was our last load of the day," Mike Robinson, one of the passengers, told NBC News. "I'll remember this one more than most," he added. So will we. 

slavicinferno:

What SciFi Movies Would REALLY Be Like…

Source

On the morning of Oct. 2, administration officials and contractors were told that six people successfully enrolled in Obamacare using HealthCare.gov. By the following morning's meeting, that number had gone up to 248.

The memos from meetings about HealthCare.gov were produced in response to subpoenas issued to the contractors by the House Oversight Committee Chairman Darrell Issa, R-Calif. Issa has also subpoenaed the Health and Human Services Department.

How many people have signed up for the new coverage in the month after the botched rollout of the Affordable Care Act website is unclear. HHS officials have said repeatedly that they will make monthly enrollment data public, and expect the first report to come mid-November.

On the morning of Oct. 2, administration officials and contractors were told that six people successfully enrolled in Obamacare using HealthCare.gov. By the following morning's meeting, that number had gone up to 248.

The memos from meetings about HealthCare.gov were produced in response to subpoenas issued to the contractors by the House Oversight Committee Chairman Darrell Issa, R-Calif. Issa has also subpoenaed the Health and Human Services Department.

How many people have signed up for the new coverage in the month after the botched rollout of the Affordable Care Act website is unclear. HHS officials have said repeatedly that they will make monthly enrollment data public, and expect the first report to come mid-November.

William Burroughs (with a pumpkin he carved with a hatchet)

Standing against a back wall, smiling as he scanned the crowd of Democrats at James Madison University, Glenn Huffman seemed open to answering a question. What do you think of Bill Clinton? "He's a bastard," Huffman replied. "That Monica Lewinsky thing just about ruined his presidency."

Dude must be a hater. Except that Huffman had stood in a 30-minute line to attend a joint appearance Tuesday of the former president and Terry McAuliffe, the Democratic candidate for governor of Virginia. Why are you here? "I came to see Bill," he shrugged. "Other than that Lewinsky thing, he was a successful and popular president. I love the man. Love to listen to the man."

As Huffman pulled me closer to chat more about Clinton, I realized that the librarian from Bridgewater, Va., might be a window into 2016, when the ex-president's wife Hillary could make a second run for the presidency. Because if there's one word that describes the feelings Hillary Clinton's friends and advisers have for Bill Clinton it would be ambivalent. He hurt her campaign in 2008, they say, but if she runs again, Bubba won't blow it.

Costume update, Edgar Allen Ho

Women's Halloween costumes have reached peak sexiness—you can now be a sexy pizza, and some people would view that as progress. "Isn't it great? The fact that women get this one night, only one, out of the whole year to be viewed as sexual objects," senior correspondent Kristen Schaal said. "And we get to choose what kind." Schaal ran through some of the dozens of options ladies have for Halloween: sexy pirate, sexy nurse, even sexier nurse, sexy defense attorney or "her nemesis," the sexy prosecutor. "'You're out of order.' 'No, you're out of order.' 'Oh, let's just make out.' 'Yeah,'" Schaal added.

So no, The Daily Show's correspondent on women's issues isn't upset about the hypersexualized nature of Halloween costumes. "Why would I be upset about progress?" she said. Back in the oppressive olden day of the last generation, she said, her mother only had two costume options: sexy secretary and sexy meter maid. "But," she said, "in these modern, liberated times a woman is free to be a sexy whatever the hell she wants." 

Not that men should be left out. Here's Schaal's sexy Hollywood Producer costume for men:

"Tell me this costume isn't dead sexy?" Schaal asked. And for women, she suggested ladies stop being so coy. Why be a sexy _____ when you can just be "the place where sex happens," as she put it.

And, as with all things, if you want to make your sexy vagina costume even sexier, hang a pizza on it. "Does the cheese match the crust?" Schaal asked. "Ooh, she'll never tell." Some things are better left to the imagination?

 

 

Punk’s not dead*

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Steve McQueen's 12 Years a Slave has been the object of praise since it first debuted at the Toronto Film Festival last month. But it's also been branded a difficult, brutal film. So, before it opens on October 18 we issue a plea: please, don't be afraid to go see this movie. 

12 Years a Slave was greeted in Toronto with effusive praise, even though there were reported walkouts, and was quickly deemed an Oscar frontrunner. But as its theatrical release has drawn closer, awards season pundits have started to wonder whether Academy voters will be skittish about the film's difficult subject matter. "The Internet is buzzing with tales of Sunday’s partially-empty screening at the Academy and the hand-wringing of industry folk (anonymous, of course) who fret that voters might be turned off by its intensity," Variety's TV Editor Tim Gray wrote last night. "A piece of friendly advice to those who might be hesitating, from the biggest wuss West of the Mississippi: Snap out of it!" 

The Wrap's Steve Pond reported that attendance was much higher for the Academy's screening of Gravity than it was for the 12 Years showing. "While members reported that the applause was robust for the film, particularly for McQueen and its principal actors, the film’s relentless violence also left some voters visibly disturbed," Pond wrote. Reporting on that same screening, Glenn Whipp of the Los Angeles Times wrote that "several Academy members indicated they had difficulty convincing their cohorts to join them at the screening. Excuses ranged from the banal ('It's not a Sunday night kind of movie') to the procrastinatory. ('I'm just not in the right frame of mind to watch that one yet.')"

Critics have also begun to knock the film for its depiction of the atrocities inflicted upon slaves. David Edelstein at New York argued that "McQueen’s directorial voice—cold, stark, deterministic—keeps it from attaining the kind of grace that marks the voice of a true film artist," while notorious (and often silly) contrarian Armond White equated it to horror cinema.

All this chatter about the difficulty of watching 12 Years a Slave does the film a huge disservice. Yes, 12 Years a Slave is not an easy film to watch. It's filled with indescribable violence and cruelty, but Solomon Northup's true story, on which the movie was based, is also filled with violence and cruelty. 

As our Richard Lawson wrote in his review, McQueen's film makes these horrors in some ways terrifyingly ordinary in a deeply uncomfortable way. There is very little comfort to be found throughout the film. But it's important to remember that this is also a story of hope. It's no spoiler to say that, given the time frame alluded to in the title, there is a happy ending to Solomon's story. And it is Solomon's story, a true story — which seems to be forgotten amid all this fretting about the film's difficult subject matter. Chiwetel Ejiofor gives a remarkably subtle and measured performance, one that deftly conveys a man's harrowing and emotional journey. It's not just about watching people be tortured—though, yes, that's a significant part of the film—it's also about seeing one man choose life, even when it would be easier not to survive. 

You're certainly not going to walk out of 12 Years a Slave with a skip in your step or a smile on your face. You may not even like the movie. But you still owe it to yourself to see it. Some unpleasant things are well worth confronting, so don't let anyone scare you away. 

In the innermost sanctum of Clintonland, it is difficult to imagine that Hillary and Bill, two of the savviest politicians in the country, are not pinching themselves to make sure that it's all real. Perhaps they're dancing a jig together, or knocking back shots and howling at the moon out of sheer, giddy joy at their good luck. (OK, Hillary's not howling, but Bill might be.) Or maybe they are just quietly kvelling over the latest turn of events.

Because the trend lines are unmistakable, and they're looking better all the time: If she wants to run in 2016, Hillary Rodham Clinton could have the easiest walk into the White House of any candidate in either party since, well, one has to go back a very long way. Maybe to Reagan in '84. LBJ in '64, or Eisenhower in '52, or even FDR in 1932, 1936 and 1940. The presidency is looking like it's hers to lose, more than ever.

The reasons are becoming more obvious with each passing crisis of Republicanism, but are even starker now in the wake of the GOP's embarrassing implosion over the shutdown and debt-ceiling fight. This is an opposition party in such a state of extreme dysfunction that talk of a third-party split in 2016 is almost irrelevant. Why would you need a third-party split to win—as Bill did, recall, cheating George H.W. Bush out of a second term in 1992 thanks to the Ross Perot candidacy—when the base and establishment of the GOP are no longer on speaking terms?

Proposed new German words for the human condition

More than twice, and maybe more than three times, I have tried to interest a friend of mine in Chris Thile, the mandolin player who is the founder of the modernist string band Punch...

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Watch Guillermo del Toro’s opening titles and couch gag for this year’s Treehouse of Horror episode of The Simpsons.