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26 Jun 16:52

I Became a Fidget Spinner to Try to Understand Fidget Spinning

by Oobah Butler
IKEA Monkey

This is 1) Very stupid and 2) Oddly very sweet

Fidget spinners are like yo-yos and Beyblades before them, a simple little toy or gadget that, for reasons unknown, have become intensely fascinating to five- to ten-year-olds. The small toy— initially marketed as a stress-reliever and an aid for those with ADHD or anxiety—has been co-opted by small children with pocket money to blow.

Crazes come and go, and it's often inexplicable why and how they peak before they bubble away. In 2017, fidget spinners are a certifiable capital-c Craze. And I do not understand them at all.

All photos by Jake Lewis

And so I went to Rye Lane in south London—home to hundreds of repurposed cellphone stalls that are now selling fidgets by the bucketload—to try to decode the mystery of the spinner.

If anyone understands crazes, it's moms, so I sought some out at the nearest playground. This young mother (left) describes how the devices became all the rage at her five-year-old son's school. When he uses his spinner, she says, he becomes "entranced".

"It's hard to know why he's become so obsessed," she explains. "He can't even really spin them properly, yet he's still so intense."

How can people be entranced by something that doesn't even function for them? She shakes her head, baffled. How can we better understand fidget spinners? "We never will," she says, apocalyptically. "But fortunately they'll be gone soon."

Tom and Hannah

Well, don't say that too loud, mom, because it's not just the hearts of the playground that have been captured; it's hip young millennial couples. Like Tom and Hannah, who have been fidgeting for "nearly three weeks."

"I was at Primavera [a music festival in Spain] last week, and all of my friends bought beautiful metallic spinners. Me too. So this is an international spinner," Hannah says, while spinning at me.

"During Aphex Twin at Field Day [a London music festival]," Tom adds, "somebody in front of me had a light-up one, and I was watching that more than his very, very expensive light show."

But how long can a small hunk of plastic keep real, actual, grown-up people entertained? "Well, I'm definitely not bored yet," Tom says. "I always think I am… Then I spin it again."

So with the boundaries seeming limitless for these metallic meddlers, have they found their way into the bedroom yet? "They have not," Hannah confirms. "I did see a commercial with one with a butt plug attached, but no, I don't own that." Tom is looking sheepish. Reveal your truth, Tom.

"I did try to spin it on my dick the other day," he says. "It was when Hannah was away." And did it thrive in these conditions? "It did not. But I think that says more about me than the spinner."

Clearly there is a primal energy about the spinner that we just cannot explain: It draws us toward it, even dick-first; it hypnotizes, it entrances. But how does one understand the thing? "It's simple," says Tom, stopping the spinner. "Just spin."

Spin. Was it that simple? Could this naïve reporter's world be turned upside-down with one simple rotation?

I decide to make the same pilgrimage the Rye Lane shopkeeper tells me "up to 300 kids" make to his shop each day.

Holding my newly bought spinner—such a small, precious thing—it begs the question: What is the big deal?

Heeding the words of both mothers and Tom alike, it is becoming abundantly clear.

To understand fidget spinners.

One must.

Become one.

Only then can any reporter truly measure the extent to which they are shaping our world and high streets.

It's been argued that spinners can "relieve stress"—they can ameliorate some of the challenges we encounter in day-to-day life.

It's been said that simply messing around with one can really bring light to one's life.

And this is true, but as everybody knows: The only way to really get these palm-size spinners is to do, oneself, what they were put on this earth to do: spin.

While the children yell "fidget spinner," hanging off it, almost pulling the actual thing apart, their parents stand back and film the spectacle on their phones. It's a dizzying high for a craze that you expect will dip very abruptly, the Pokemon Go of the plastic toy industry.

All good things come to an end for all crazes, and it seems to be a foregone conclusion that—sooner rather than later—the world will have moved onto something entirely different.

But I've learned something, being a fidget spinner.

From watching gym beefcakes try to stifle their chuckling to groups of students taking photos, I've experienced such intense jubilation from everyone I've passed. Children didn't see the moonfaced person underneath the gigantic spinner: They saw something beyond human, yelling "fidget spinner" at me continuously, like I was a concept. A million miles from the wares they're selling in Bloomingdale's, fidget spinners are available on literally every street corner, from London to New York, for just $4.

I guess what I'm saying is: Fidget spinners are the people's fad. And they have the joy-inspiring, banal, and affordable appeal to unite us—at least for the next three weeks, until some new craze comes along.

Follow Oobah Butler on Twitter.

24 Jun 14:37

Why Sean Spicer is actually a genius

IKEA Monkey

This just showed up looking like something written by a demon on acid.

Why Sean Spicer is actually a geniusWhen it comes to White House Press Secretary Sean Spicer, most people would not immediately label him as a "smart guy." He has drawn criticism for making false and often controversial statements, and his general combativeness with the press. But he is human, is he not? Are you perfect? He deserves a champion. And that champion is me.  I'm going to outline exactly how Sean Spicer is actually a genius, and how everything he's doing is actually going really well. 1. He handles the questions like a boss. Image: Getty ImagesWhen it comes to handling boring and purposeless questions from the press, Sean Spicer is actually really smarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrttttttttttttttttttttt†t†t†††††††††††††††† / /:ERROR:/ / and handles each question with tACT and pROfFESIONALISM+ 2. He speaks articulatelelelelelelelelleleleyyyyyyyyyÿy¥¥¥  HE is very SMARTTT and speaks with good articulation and = = =. = = = = = = = =WRONGWRONGWRONGWRONGWRONGWRONGWRONGWRONGWRONGWRONGWRO NGWRONGWRONGWRONWRONGWRONGWRONGWRONGWRONGWRONGWRONGWRO NGWRONG  / /:ERROR:/ / :THE PLANE OF REALITY YOU DESCRIBE DOES NOT EXIST IN THIS UNIVERSE:/ /:DO NOT TRY THIS AGAIN:/ / 3. The way he is CooL uNDer PressuRE WASHINGTON, DC - MAY 21: White House Press Secretary Sean Spicer displays his cool nature and level-headedness.Image: / /:ERROR:/ /[WARNING: DO NOT CONTINUE —— THE CONSEQUENCES WILL BE DREADFUL]  4. 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                                                                                                                                              Image: mashable composite; shutterstock/Mark Wilson/Getty Images / /:ERROR: // [[WARNING: YOU ARE ENTERING A DIMENSION WHERE YOU DO NOT BELONG. SCROLL BACK UP TO RE-ENTER YOUR OWN DIMENSION.]]  / /:ERROR:/ / [ [WARNING: YOU WILL NOT LIKE WHAT YOU FIND IF YOU CONTINUE] ]                                                                            .                                                                    .                                                            .                                                              .                                                                  .                                                                               .                                                                  .                                                           .                                                     .                                                          . //:OUTPUT: WHY SSEAN SPICERR IS. A GENIUS    THE HONORABLE SEAN SPICER, HIS DIVINE HOLINESS, AND YOUR FATHER, ADDRESSES A CROWDImage: MARK WILSON/Getty Images7. The WAy He Is Your FAther  SeAn Spicer Is Your FAther And AlwAys Has Been. You Love Your FAther. Give Him A Kiss?  SEAN SPICER IS YOUR FATHER HERE. LEAVE.Image: aaron p. bernstein/Getty Images6.. In This ReAlity SeAn Spicer Is Your FAther, BrAve, SmArt, And A Hero   GET OUT FROM THIS PLACEImage: olivier douliery/Getty ImagesWelcome.  In This ReAlity, The WeAk thrive greAtly. The World Is Destroyed By WAr And There Is No WATer.  You Are Next To Die  . .. .. . Scroll back up. You Are Next To Die YOU HAVE SEEN TOO MUCHImage: alex wong/Getty ImagesSCroll back up. SCROLL BACK UP. Thanks for reading Mashable Humor: original comedy every day. Or most days. We're people, just like you, and we're trying our best. WATCH: Researchers are using sound to levitate objects, and it's changing the medical industry  


24 Jun 04:03

Trump, North Korea, and Otto Warmbier

by candorville@gmail.com

As America mourns and considers a response, President Trump denounces North Korea for its horrible mistreatment of American tourist Otto Warmbier.

The post Trump, North Korea, and Otto Warmbier appeared first on Darrin Bell.

23 Jun 18:45

Great Job, Internet!: Kid’s go-kart goes apeshit, spinning him through time and space

by Randall Colburn
IKEA Monkey

genuine lols

Before this week, the internet’s greatest go-kart-related phenomenon involved Tony Danza, who once took a hilarious and horrific-looking tumble in the days when he still hosted his own daytime talk show. Well, step down, Tony, because you’ve just been usurped by this human fidget spinner.

So captivated was the internet by the above footage that a few intrepid souls have made their own remixes. Some are simple, like the one layering in Hans Zimmer’s “Interstellar docking theme.”

Others are kind of eerie, like this one that finds a school of Asian carp summoning Go-Kart Kid from the heavens.

None, however, will be able to top the below video, which sets Go-Kart Kid on a kaleidoscopic journey through time, space, and meme culture. The boy is first sucked into a black hole, then spun off onto the heads of a cat, a basketball player’s nimble finger, and ...

23 Jun 18:07

McDonald’s Has Released Minion Tater-Tots Because Ba-Ba-Banana

by Chris Durso
IKEA Monkey

Corey

We may not understand what they’re saying, but Minions sure do make for some adorable food items. To help promote Despicable Me 3, McDonald’s has created Minion Potatoes. Shaped to look like the adorable yellow dudes, the tater tots are perfect for dipping, or to assist larger evil food items. The Minion Potatoes appear to only […]
23 Jun 17:39

Three-bedroom loft in the heart of Wicker Park asks $525K

by AJ LaTrace
IKEA Monkey

I like the sliding door. Would be nice to get one in our master bedroom for the bathroom so we could get a bigger bed (currenty, the bathroom door swings out so we can only fit a queen, which between me being 5'8", Corey being over 6' tall, and two dogs that love to sprawl out, is getting a wee bit cramped)

This lofty unit features plenty of space and lots of upgrades

If you’ve got your heart set on a loft in Wicker Park, this may be the one you’ve been holding out for. The unit, located on Milwaukee Avenue, boasts high ceilings, tall windows, and exposed brick walls, but you’re also getting a place that has been fitted out with quality finishes. Highlights include the updated kitchen, a newer fireplace, and outdoor balcony space, but the excellent location in the center of the bustling Wicker Park neighborhood is certainly one of the top features here.

Listed as a three-bedroom, two-bathroom unit, this same space has exchanged hands a couple of times in the last decade. It last sold for $425,000 in April 2015 but returns this week seeking $525,000. The monthly assessment of $501 is steeper than similar units, but the listing suggests that a space in a heated parking garage is included in that price.

23 Jun 13:58

‘You’re Uncomfortable For A Few Hours And Then You Get To Be...

IKEA Monkey

This is so true



‘You’re Uncomfortable For A Few Hours And Then You Get To Be Somewhere Else,’ Says CEO

DENVER—Noting that some discomfort should be expected while traveling to a faraway place in just a few goddamn hours, officials from ultra-low-cost carrier Frontier Airlines reportedly told customers Thursday to just fucking deal with it. “I get that you’re cramped and miserable, but if you just shut the hell up and sit there for a few goddamn hours, you’ll soon be at your destination,” said CEO Barry L. Biffle, urging passengers to suck it up and quit whining so the flight could get on its merry fucking way. “Who gives a shit if you have no leg room and the seats are stiff? Soon you’ll be 800 miles from where you are now, and it’ll be like the last two hours of your life never even fucking happened. You’re the ones who wanted to save $150, so you’re welcome, assholes.” Biffle added that he didn’t want to hear any bitching and moaning about wanting in-flight food options, because everyone can just stuff their stupid faces when they land.

23 Jun 13:29

Newswire: Here’s the Wu-Tang Clan’s new song from the Silicon Valley soundtrack

by William Hughes
IKEA Monkey

New Wu

Pitchfork reports that the Wu-Tang Clan has just released a new song, produced by RZA, and featuring lines from Method Man, Raekwon, and Inspectah Deck. Luckily, you don’t have to be a millionaire sociopath to listen to “Don’t Stop”; it’ll be available on the upcoming soundtrack album for HBO’s Silicon Valley, and is streaming right now on SoundCloud:

The soundtrack also features music from Nas, Hudson Mohawke, DJ Shadow, and Danny Brown. It’ll be out tomorrow on Mass Appeal Records, all the better to underscore your comedic coding needs.

23 Jun 03:14

Newswire: Rational person Johnny Depp made a joke about being the next John Wilkes Booth

by Sam Barsanti
IKEA Monkey

ok cool lock him up or put him on an ice floe and shove him into the ocean. goodbye

Johnny Depp doesn’t exactly have a reputation for making good decisions (not to mention the allegations that he abused ex-wife Amber Heard), but even he has to realize that his latest wacky stunt is going to become a big headache once the Fox News crowd hears about it. According to The Hollywood Reporter, Depp took some time out of an appearance at the Glastonbury Festival in England tonight to talk about Donald Trump, and after noting that he thinks Trump “needs help,” he asked the cheering crowd, “When was the last time an actor assassinated a president?” You can see a video of this below.

Depp’s faux-puzzled reaction to the crowd’s response indicates that he thought it was a pretty clever reference to Lincoln assassin John Wilkes Booth, who was an actor, but the fact that he would make a joke like this suggests that he’s ...

23 Jun 01:41

Getting $64K to Nanny in a Haunted House Sounds... Pretty Sweet

by Drew Schwartz
IKEA Monkey

I'd do it

A family living in a rural Scottish village is looking for a full-time nanny, and they're offering a hell of a package—sweeping views of the countryside; a private bed, bath, and kitchen; 28 vacation days; and a £50,000 ($64,000) salary. The job sounds like a dream, but finding someone to fill the position has apparently become a total nightmare.

That's because the house is reportedly haunted, NBC affiliate 9News reports. According to a recent online listing for the position, the family living in the Scottish Borders home says they were told the place was supposedly frequented by ghosts before moving in, but didn't really believe it until a handful of nannies quit due to some spooky paranormal activity.

"Five nannies have left the role in the last year, each citing supernatural incidents as the reason, including strange noises, broken glass, and furniture moving," the mother wrote in the listing. "This has obviously been a period of great upheaval for our children."

For whatever reason, the mother also claimed that evil spirits only seem to show up when she and her husband are out of town. They've never seen black ooze dripping from the walls or spotted a poltergeist in the bathroom mirror or anything, but from the sound of the ad, they seem to be taking the whole haunted house thing pretty seriously.

"We're happy to pay above the asking rate, and feel it's important to be as up front as possible to find the right person," the listing reads.

For what it pays, the job's pretty cushy. All the prospective nanny has to do is make breakfast, wake the kids (five and seven), take them to school, pick them up, help out with their homework, and put them to bed. And then, ostensibly, investigate any garbled screams coming from the attic or whatever.

It's a bummer that the Scots have to deal with a bunch of ghouls dicking around in their house, but at least they don't have a creepy watcher sending them threatening letters. And even if the family can't manage to find a nanny, their kids will probably turn out fine growing up in the company of ghosts anyway.

Follow Drew Schwartz on Twitter.

22 Jun 23:11

Newswire: John Oliver sees a coal company’s cease-and-desist letter and raises them these nuts

by Dennis Perkins
IKEA Monkey

L O L

Upon finding out that your Trump-friendly coal company is being featured on an upcoming episode of Last Week Tonight With John Oliver, one might think that a strongly worded legal threat to sue said show and its cheeky British host into smithereens “all the way to the Supreme Court” is a good idea. And it is, if you want Oliver and his team of political comedy professionals to double down on reporting the unsavory, hypocritical, and downright shady stuff you get up to. That’s the mistake that one Bob Murray, CEO of Murray Energy Corp and, according to Oliver, “geriatric Dr. Evil,” made when informed that Oliver was going to look at how Donald Trump’s vote-grubbing on the issue of restoring coal jobs was as disingenuous as much of the coal industry’s rhetoric to its workers.

Kicking off the Murray Energy portion of his coal report by ...

22 Jun 22:03

Popular Filipino-meets-barbecue spot Smalls closes 'too small' shop, looks for bigger space

by Joseph Hernandez

Back in May, Joaquin Soler, chef-owner of Albany Park’s acclaimed Smalls, wrote on the restaurant’s Facebook page that the restaurant was temporarily closed for equipment repairs. Instead of the usual menu specials Soler regularly shared on Instagram and Facebook, the only posts in the ensuing...

22 Jun 20:18

How Bourdain ate at the end of the world

IKEA Monkey

They don't really mention Bourdain in the article (which is fine) but this is really fascinating

22 Jun 19:33

Great Job, Internet!: We can retire the phrase “dunking on,” now that Lebron James dunked on actual children

by Clayton Purdom
IKEA Monkey

WHY'S JAMES CRYIN

On the internet, we like to talk about people dunking on other people. It’s a clean narrative of supremacy originating in one of the most electrifying moves in sports, when a player rises and manually, thunderously puts numbers on the board, preferably as an opposing player looks on from the floor. It implies not just dominance but a sense of revelry in it, of purposely showboating in someone else’s moment of defeat. Dunking on people is great. Watching people get dunked on is even better.

What if one of the world’s greatest practitioners of real-life jams showed up to literally dunk on a bunch of children? That is what Lebron James spent the weekend doing, as evidenced by this video footage of him at his son’s birthday party.

22 Jun 18:52

Face/Off Is 20 Years Old

by Megan Garber
IKEA Monkey

"You might also think, given all that—and given all the doubleness built into the premise of this film—that Face/Off would have things to say about religion, and/or Cartesian dualism, and/or the nature of the self, and/or the nature of the soul. But—and here is the true greatness of the movie—it really, really does not."

If you're bored, go to the IMDB page for this movie (which was made for $80,000,000 20 years ago) and read the "goofs" part of the trivia. Get comfy bc that list is LONG.

We ask a lot of action movies these days. Explosions, first of all—those are non-negotiable. Balletically choreographed fight scenes, definitely. Winking jokes, a general sense of whimsy, unapologetic violence—almost always. But that’s not enough, anymore. Today’s audiences, being a sophisticated and jaded sort, expect ambitious approaches to action as a genre and, really, as an ideology: We want action that is also art. Narratives with literary nuance. Heroes who double—maybe! ambiguously!—as anti-heroes. Villains who are evil but also so very complicated in their villainy. Plots that, like cinematic parfaits, are intentionally layered, and that have in the layering something to say, by turns, about recurrent bloodshed and life under terrorism and the trolley problem and the purpose-driven life and The Way We Live Now.


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It’s wonderful, definitely, all this literary aspiration. It helps to make heroes cinematically interesting and narratively compelling. But all this meaning-layering can also be, for the viewer, exhausting. There’s so much to think about, when you see a movie today. So much to analyze. Even—and, now, especially—when the production you’re watching involves a guy who saves the world while clad in a colorful pair of exo-underwear.

I mention all that because of Face/Off, the John Woo movie that turns 20 years old this week and that remains, despite the many action films that have followed it, a reasonable contender in the crowded contest for the Best Action Movie of All Time. Face/Off is not, in the literary way, artful. It is great for precisely none of the reasons that a 21st-century action flick might be called “great.” Its characters are cartoonishly flat; its story is patently absurd; its writing, and indeed the general attitude it adopts toward the English language as an institution, pays preemptive homage to the Bravo school of “unscripted” dramas. “The clock is ticking and so is the bomb,” one character informs another, to set the stage for the events that will unfold in the film, and the line is exceedingly stupid and entirely straightforward and, in that, absolutely perfect.

The plot of Face/Off goes like this: Sean Archer (John Travolta), do-gooder and FBI agent, has spent much of his career following the nefarious workings of the terrorist-for-hire Castor Troy (Nicolas Cage). Just after Castor and his brother (Pollux, natch) plant a bomb somewhere in Los Angeles, set to detonate at a time between “now” and “very soon,” the FBI raids them and their gang—with the resulting firefight putting Castor in a coma. With Pollux in prison, there’s only one way for Archer to determine the location of the bomb—the clock is ticking—before it does its worst: Archer must, yes, pretend to be Castor. Enter the experimental surgery in which Castor’s face, yes, comes off.

But then—twist! Or, well, another one! Castor, defying the expectations of the medical establishment, wakes up from his coma! And then he forces the doctor who did the original face transplant to graft Archer’s face—floating, by then, in some unnamed liquid, to be reclaimed by its owner at a later date—onto his own! And so it happens that, Sean Archer must navigate the world wearing the face of his sworn enemy. And that Castor Troy must do the same. Troy, a sociopath with a finely tuned sense of irony, is decidedly more enthusiastic about the situation.

Think the men will end up fighting each other, in a balletically choreographed manner? Think Troy will crack jokes about how handsome the FBI agent has become, post-surgery? Think he’ll make wincingly inappropriate remarks to Archer’s teenage daughter? Think things will culminate in an oceanside church, with doves flying and organs blaring and guns blasting in a symphony of contained violence? Yes. And yes. And yes.

You might also think, given all that—and given all the doubleness built into the premise of this film—that Face/Off would have things to say about religion, and/or Cartesian dualism, and/or the nature of the self, and/or the nature of the soul. But—and here is the true greatness of the movie—it really, really does not. This is not a philosophical film. It doesn’t brood or wonder. Instead, it features 139 minutes of John Woo doing what John Woo is so singularly good at, which is to make movies of set pieces, and to stage each action sequence, in particular, as a deftly choreographed performance unto itself. The rest—the characters, the dialogue, the story itself—is scaffolding. There’s a scene that finds Archer and Troy aiming their guns at each other, each on the opposite end of a double-sided mirror … and the image that results is on the nose, sort of literally, but also the whole point.

So Face/Off is an achievement of pure entertainment, and pure aesthetics. It is striking and fun and occasionally funny, and that is quite enough for it. The movie might hint at what would come, from other action films, as they began to take themselves more ambitiously—even its titular pun is suggestive of symbolism—and yet it never fully engages in any of that self-seriousness. It doesn’t need to. It understands that, sometimes, the most delightful thing that can happen on a movie screen is John Travolta playing Nic Cage playing a fictional character—and then making a Travolta-lobbed crack about “this nose, this hair, this ridiculous chin.” Face/Off understands that, sometimes, the best thing an action movie can do is to set a climactic, explosion-fueled firefight to an especially emotive rendition of “Somewhere Over the Rainbow.” Why set that particular scene to that particular song? The better question, this movie insists, is: Why not do that? Face/Off could be smarter than it is, sure, but why bother? It’s having too much fun.

22 Jun 18:41

Workers clear room for controversial Logan Square micro apartments

by Jay Koziarz
IKEA Monkey

MORE of these?? Jesus. That train stop is going to be choked.

Following a fierce landlord-tenant dispute, the TOD at 2342-48 N. California Avenue is back on track

In the works for over three years, a six-story transit-oriented development (TOD) in Chicago’s rapidly-changing Logan Square neighborhood is finally moving forward. Located at 2342-48 N. California Avenue and steps from the Blue Line, the project from Savoy Development will deliver 138 “micro apartments,” 44 parking spaces, four ground-floor retail spaces, and a public pocket park. Studio and one-bedroom units in the upcoming building will range between 439 and 537 square feet in size and rent for roughly $1,200 to $1,400 per month.

The project became a lightning rod for growing concerns over gentrification and affordability in Logan Square last winter when landlord Francisco Macias moved to evict several families from the site’s existing apartment building. Citing months of nonpayment, Mr. Macias refused to extend the move-out deadline to March.

Alderman Proco Joe Moreno (1st) then got involved and reportedly threatened to strip the property of its zoning if a solution could not be found. A compromise was ultimately reached that pushed the eviction date back from January 15th to the end of the month and provided relocation assistance to occupants, reported DNAinfo.

With the tenant-landlord dispute resolved, the developer took possession of the triangle-shaped property this spring and is preparing the site for construction. Demolition permits were recently issued for both the shuttered car wash at 2336 N. California and the aforementioned six-unit rental building at 2342 N. California. Once those structures are removed, the long-delayed TOD can finally begin construction in earnest.

 Google Street View
22 Jun 16:24

AVC Sessions: Tank And The Bangas kick off our new series, AVC Sessions

by Baraka Kaseko
IKEA Monkey

They're great. If you have 20 minutes, listen/watch their NPR Tiny Desk show.

Here at The A.V. Club, we love it when artists come perform for us in our studio, so we’re going to make it a regular thing with the launch of our new series, AVC Sessions. The premise is dead simple: For each Session, we’ll bring in an artist, band, musician, singer, rapper, etc. to perform three of their own tracks. For the inaugural Session, NPR Tiny Desk Contest winners Tank And The Bangas brought their style and New Orleans charm to the A.V. Club studio. In the first video from this Session, the group performs “Boxes And Squares,” a track from its 2013 album, Think Tank.

Tank And The Bangas are on tour now. Dates are listed here.

22 Jun 13:23

Newswire: Jesus Christ, George Clooney just sold his tequila company for $1 billion

by William Hughes
IKEA Monkey

Business is business. Good on him.

George Clooney has now moved from the world of “very rich actor’ into the realm of “Dr. Dre-esque performer/mogul,” with CNBC reporting that Clooney just sold his tequila company, Casamigos, to multinational alcohol company Diageo for $1 billion. (Technically, it’s only $700 million now, and $300 million later based on performance, but that’s still enough money to keep a guy in pot-bellied pigs for a long, long time.)

Clooney co-founded the company back in 2013, operating on the theory that “high-end tequila” is something you’d just sort of assume George Clooney was into. The actor gave a statement about the sale, writing, “If you asked us four years ago if we had a billion dollar company, I don’t think we would have said yes. This reflects Diageo’s belief in our company and our belief in Diageo. But we’re not going anywhere. We’ll ...

22 Jun 13:21

Newswire: R.I.P. Henry Deutschendorf, baby Oscar from Ghostbusters 2

by William Hughes
IKEA Monkey

How sad :(

Henry Deutschendorf, the onetime actor who played baby Oscar in Ghostbusters 2 along with his twin brother William, has died at the age of 29. His death was reported by his brother.

Although they both appeared in the high-profile sequel (and a documentary about it filmed earlier this year), neither of the Deutschendorf twins ever acted again. Instead, they became martial arts teachers and trainers, operating a martial arts center in California. William wrote a remembrance for his brother today, revealing that he’d suffered for several years with schizoaffective disorder—a mental disorder that combines the symptoms of mood disorders with those of schizophrenia—and that he’d ultimately lost his battle with the disease.

Hank was diagnosed in August of 2008. If you knew Hank before his diagnosis, you knew a young man who was upbeat, healthy, witty, kind, outgoing, and was always ready to stand up for ...

22 Jun 05:31

Any Toy, No Matter How Fun Or Popular, Can Be Dangerous

by Laura Northrup

Just because a toy is popular, that doesn’t mean it can’t cause kids serious harm. That’s the warning that the safety advocates of World Against Toys Causing Harm (WATCH) have for parents as summer officially arrives.

Fidget spinners, which gained popularity this year, top the group’s list of “Summer Safety Traps” that parents and other caregivers should watch out for this summer.

What’s wrong with fidget spinners? They might seem pretty harmless, but once there are enough of any toy out on the market, someone is going to be harmed. There are two documented cases of kids choking on spinners that fell apart, one of whom had to have a plastic piece removed from her esophagus.

“Do not be lulled into a false sense of security that a toy is safe simply because it is popular,” the group’s president warned.

Last year’s hot toy, hoverboards with rechargeable batteries, could literally overheat and cause house fires, and WATCH included the toys in its warning for this summer as well.

A huge number of hoverboards were recalled, as were plenty of other toys and baby items — yet they’re still in homes.

As fun and frugal as buying toys and kids’ items on Craigslist or your local “mama swap” Facebook group might be, remember to check items for outstanding recalls before you buy or sell them.

Other domestic dangers that the group warned about are toys with small parts that may break off, backyard trampolines and bouncy houses, kiddie pools that have enough water for a child to drown in, toy swords with hard edges, and high-powered toy guns that fire water or pellets.

Have a fun, carefree summer, everyone!

22 Jun 03:55

Chicagoans Found A Rare, 35mm Print Of 'Suspiria' & It's Coming To The Big Screen

by Stephen Gossett
Chicagoans Found A Rare, 35mm Print Of 'Suspiria' & It's Coming To The Big Screen Film fans, rejoice! Just in time for the remake. [ more › ]
21 Jun 16:48

Fridges: To decorate or not to decorate

by Asad Syrkett
IKEA Monkey

Oh man, our fridge is usually LOADED with stuff. Magnets, photos, invitations, etc. We removed it all for staging.

In the quest for design-forward spaces, have we spirited away all signs of real life from our homes?

You’ve seen them (and Curbed has photographed them): gorgeous, minimalist modern houses, their refrigerators free of the kinds of mementos and memorabilia we’ve all accumulated.

From birth announcements and wedding invitations to postcards and travel tchotchkes, lots of folks display them, mounted on the fridge with magnets of all kinds, but you’d be (very) hard-pressed to find them in the kinds of Stylish Spaces™ that make our pages and those of the glossy shelter magazines.

Why is that? What do design-minded homeowners have against ye old refrigerator decoration (and its cousin, family photos)? At the risk of sounding like a Better Homes and Gardens Carrie Bradshaw, we couldn’t help but wonder: Have we Kondo’d away any signs of real life from our homes?

To get some answers we asked Curbed readers.

Of nearly 150 respondents, 36 percent said they have minimal pics, event invitations, and other knickknacks around, while 29 percent reported having nothing on their refrigerators. (24 percent said their refrigerators are “drowning” in photographs and more and all we can say is if it sparks joy, so be it.)

We also took an informal poll of Curbed editors, many of whom sent photos of their own refrigerator decorations. Those for whom a sleekly decorated fridge is the goal had magnet recommendations to keep things looking sharp. Others took a more laissez-faire approach when it came to magnets—and general decor, too. And two other editors had absolutely no things whatsoever on their respective fridges, which seems draconian, but—different strokes.

This editor, for one, hopes that folks are just stashing away their cherished family photos when the photographers come over—and not forgoing them altogether. But if they are, do the photos end up elsewhere? We want to hear from you! What do you do with the myriad odds and ends mailed to you or acquired on vacations?

21 Jun 15:42

Hundreds of residences planned for former industrial stretch of North Branch

by AJ LaTrace
IKEA Monkey

Interesting

The longtime industrial corridor is beginning its major transition with new mixed-use development

The Chicago River’s North Branch has for decades been a major corridor for industrial users, but a transformative initiative approved last month by the Chicago Plan Commission has cleared the path for new uses, such as residential and retail development. Just weeks after the vote, a developer has come forth with a plan for 300 new residences, the Chicago Tribune reports.

According to real estate reporter Ryan Ori, local developer Belgravia Realty Group is eyeing a “triangular” 4.5-acre property along Elston Avenue. Ori also adds that the site is located just west of a Mariano’s grocery store and is bordered by train tracks and Webster Avenue. The site is located just across the river from the under-construction C.H. Robinson headquarters on Webster Avenue which will bring 1,000 jobs to the area.

 Google Maps
The 4.5-acre property is highlighted in the center of this image.

According to the report, Belgravia is looking to bring roughly 340 total residences and 60,000 square feet of retail space to the triangular property. The unit count breaks down to 90 for-sale condominiums and 250 rental apartments spread out over several low-rise buildings. However, the sale of the property is contingent on obtaining a zoning change for the project.

The proposal is significant not only for its scale, but also in being the first major residential and retail project proposed for the area after the passage of the North Branch Industrial Corridor Framework Plan last month. The scope of the initiative covers a total of 760 acres of prime waterfront real estate along the Chicago River’s North Branch. And while several major office and commercial projects have been proposed and constructed over the last few years, this new deal is a sign of what is to come to the former industrial corridor.

19 Jun 16:31

Cook County property tax rates: Look up your town, estimate your bill

by Ryan Marx and Jonathon Berlin
IKEA Monkey

goddammit

Cook County Clerk David Orr's latest annual report on city and suburban property tax rates points toward higher bills for many in the county. The average Chicago property tax bill is going up about 10 percent while the average homeowner in suburban Cook County can expect to pay anywhere from 3.9...
17 Jun 17:34

Newswire: Hung jury leads to mistrial in Bill Cosby sexual assault case

by William Hughes

The Bill Cosby sexual assault trial ended in a mistrial today, leaving Cosby’s alleged victims in tears, the district attorney defiant, the comedian himself “still and solemn,” and the rest of us realizing that we’re probably going to be forced to think and talk about this case for the rest of our (or, more likely, Cosby’s) natural lives. Judge Steven O’Neill declared the mistrial this morning after the jury—which has been in deliberation for six days—declared itself unable to come to a unanimous decision on the three indecent assault charges that have been levied against the comedian.

The jury’s deliberations went on for longer than the actual testimony in the trial itself, which they made frequent requests to have read back to them. That includes witness testimony from Cosby’s (current, out of the many women who have come forward over the years ...

17 Jun 16:46

Two great units between Logan Square and Avondale for under $200K

by AJ LaTrace
IKEA Monkey

Hey, the one on Francisco is being sold by Bob Safranski, the agent who sold us our condo 5 years ago.

It doesn’t have to cost an arm and a leg to get a place of your own

What can $200,000 get you in Chicago? Well, it’ll definitely get you a decent place if you dig around a bit. While it’s not as common to find listings in this range as much as it was in the years directly following the real estate crash of the last decade, it seems that if you’re patient and hold out for the right place, it will eventually surface. Here’s a look at a couple of places around the northwest side that are currently available for under $200,000.

3319 W. George Street #3

For $179,900, this 650-square-foot one-bedroom on the border of Avondale and Logan Square is really tough to beat. Finishes aren’t top tier or “luxury” by any means, but the place is nice and clean and the staging shows how quaint and nice this one can be. It’s not the largest one-bedroom for sale in the area, but it does have a lovely brick fireplace (decorative, not wood or gas burning), in-unit laundry, and a back porch. The monthly assessment is only $206, making this one in reach for many.

2842 N. Francisco Avenue #1A

You’ll get a little more room with this listing on Francisco. Also located on the border of Logan Square and Avondale, this two-bedroom unit is seeking $175,000. The unit is in a classic Chicago courtyard building and sports large bay windows, refinished hardwood floors, and radiator heat. This one is a co-op, so while the asking price is lower than the George Street one-bedroom, you’re going to be paying a much steeper monthly assessment of $543.

17 Jun 16:42

Two-bedroom condo in converted 19th century Lakeview church lists for $519K

by Jay Koziarz
IKEA Monkey

Is the kid's name "URBAN" or are they just acknowledging where they live

Skylights and a large ‘oculus’ window flood this unique Chicago property with tons of natural light

Combining a desirable Lakeview location with unique architectural details, this two-bedroom, two-bathroom duplex penthouse inside the former Pillar of Fire Church has a lot offer. In addition to its 15-foot skylit ceilings, the unit features original 1880 truss-work and an eye-catching oversized ‘oculus’ window. The home’s kitchen includes track lighting, stone countertops, stainless appliances, and a breakfast bar. A lofted bonus room could serve as a TV room, home office, or an extra sleeping area.

Though not quite as stunning as the $1.5 million condo in the converted church around the corner at 3101 N. Seminary, the newly-listed residence is a relative value at $519,000. With a private rooftop terrace, heated one-car garage spot, and an additional storage room also included, the deal looks that much sweeter.

16 Jun 19:04

Newswire: Alex Jones secretly recorded Megyn Kelly, threatens to release audio

by Sam Barsanti
IKEA Monkey

What a shit show

Megyn Kelly’s decision to interview Infowars host and conspiracy theory-loving asshole Alex Jones on her new NBC News show is continuing to look like a huge mistake—mostly due to the fact that Jones has spent years maintaining that the Sandy Hook shooting was a hoax. Earlier this week, as family members of Sandy Hook victims were denouncing Kelly and advertisers began pulling out of her show, Jones himself declared that NBC should cancel the airing of the interview because Kelly was “misrepresenting” his views on Sandy Hook. At the time, Jones was making it look like he was taking a moral stand and defending his right not to have his words misconstrued in an interview, but as he does with everything, Jones has now (metaphorically) ripped off his shirt and taken a dive straight into the deep end.

Tonight, Infowars released a clip of audio that’s apparently ...

16 Jun 16:57

Trump questions Hillary Clinton's link with Russia in series of tweets

by foxnewsonline@foxnews.com (Fox News Online)
IKEA Monkey

Russia didn't collude with Hillary to help her LOSE

16 Jun 14:07

Great Job, Internet!: Take a trip through the past 100 years of party food, from Cheetos to clams casino

by Gwen Ihnat
IKEA Monkey

kids are so cute

Those Bon Appetit video kids have had to slog through a lot of unsavory dishes, most recently with “100 Years Of Fine Dining,” where they had to dive into non-kid friendly menu items like pheasant under glass. So they probably thought this latest lineup was the best ever, celebrating “100 Years Of Party Snacks.”

As usual, interesting factoids are sprinkled throughout, like the fact that Cheetos (a big hit with the kids) go all the way back to 1948, or that Utz potato chips were so popular in the ’60s that the company had to hire extra workers. The kids just get happier as the decades continue, moving from clams casino and fondue to foods they can actually identify, like Cool Ranch Doritos and Bagel Bites. Hopefully these fond memories of party food can last them through the next time they have to endure “100 Years Of Health Foods” or ...