The 90-year-old actor is still impossibly charming. [ more › ]
IKEA Monkey
Shared posts
Video: Dick Van Dyke Led A Sing-Along At Walt Disney's Childhood Home
IKEA MonkeyHe's 90?!
The 90-year-old actor is still impossibly charming. [ more › ]
The Trailer for Kate Mara's Sci-Fi Movie Morgan Looks Tight
IKEA MonkeyOK, I'm into it

Scientists try and fail to contain a highly evolved test-tube creation in the trailer for the sci-flick Morgan.
50 of Horror Cinema’s Most Fashionable Moments
IKEA MonkeyGoals
We have a new movie to add to the fashion-forward horror cinema canon. Nicolas Winding Refn’s The Neon Demon is now in theaters. Set in the fashion world, Refn’s film finds an aspiring model trying to make her way in beauty-obsessed Los Angeles where the women around her will do whatever it takes to get ahead. The film amassed a following well before its release, thanks to Refn’s stunning visuals and teasers of lead star Elle Fanning’s avant-garde costumes. She’s in good company in horror cinema, which may be one of the most underrated genres when it comes to best-dressed characters. With horror filmmakers constantly pushing limits, the genre has produced some fascinating fashions and iconic sartorial moments.
Newswire: Nick Kroll and John Mulaney are putting too much tuna on Broadway
IKEA MonkeyAmazing
Broadway’s Lyceum Theatre will soon reek of tuna. That’s because John Mulaney and Nick Kroll’s prankster alter egos George St. Geegland and Gil Faizon will set up shop there starting this fall for Oh, Hello on Broadway. This is a huge move for these Upper West Side denizens who have already had an acclaimed off-Broadway run in New York and a tour.
George and Gil made the announcement in a Facebook Live video last night, insisting repeatedly, “this is not a joke.” Kroll’s already told the New York Times that, for Broadway, George and Gil’s “main request is showgirls.” He added, “And we haven’t quite figured out how to tell them that the union has made it clear that they will not provide any showgirls for a George and Gil production.” But, showgirls or none, there will of course be tuna. “There are whole ...
Obama's approval rating up to 52%
IKEA MonkeyWow its almost like people are realizing we've had it pretty good the past 8 years
Beyoncé and Kendrick Lamar Open the 2016 BET Awards With 'Freedom'
IKEA MonkeyAmazing performance
McConnell won't say if Trump is qualified
IKEA MonkeyCrazy, the American People voted twice for Obama, so does that mean McConnell thinks Obama is qualified? If so why's he been giving him such a godamn hard time?
Texas Woman Killed By Police After Fatally Shooting Her Two Daughters
IKEA Monkey"In March, Sheats posted the following message to her Facebook account, along with a video from 911Strong:
It would be horribly tragic if my ability to protect myself or my family were to be taken away, but that’s exactly what Democrats are determined to do by banning semi-automatic handguns."

Texas police fatally shot a 42-year-old mother after she refused to put down the gun she used to murder two of her own daughters in a Houston suburb.
5 Awesome and Adorable Products You Can Get at CatCon
IKEA MonkeyMy allergies would be out of control
This weekend, CatCon—the convention for people who love cats—returns to Los Angeles. Visitors will brush paws with Lil Bub, Pudge, and Nala cat, hear from cat behaviorists and other feline-related speakers, adopt kitties, and, of course, buy some really awesome cat stuff. Here are a few things you might want to pick up if you’re at CatCon this weekend (and where you can buy everything if you won’t be there).
Man Charged With Attempted Sexual Assault At Pizza Hut
IKEA MonkeyI'm at the pizza hut! I'm at the taco bell! I'm at the combination pizza hut and police station
The attacker would not cooperate until police let him finish his beer. [ more › ]
All The Cool Adults Are Taking Classes
IKEA MonkeyThe best thing I've done all year is start taking my painting class. I love it.

Classes are the solution to most problems, existential and logistical. “But anything I need to learn, I can learn on the internet,” the less enlightened might argue. Yeah, yeah, it’s true, sort of—the internet is indeed a treasure trove of YouTube knowledge, MOOCs are the future, and soon we will all live in pods. The same mindset that leads people to the internet to learn a skill is the one that keeps us indoors, hibernating, and overly self-indulgent. Do not let technological convenience fully dictate your life, though! Take a class.
Man guilty of sending nude photos of woman to Naperville employer
IKEA MonkeyDudes are the worst
A man who sent naked photographs of a woman to her Naperville employer after she declined to date him has been sentenced to community service work and court supervision.
James J. Casey, 32, with addresses listed in the 700 block of Academy Street in Valparaiso, Ind., and the 2600 block of North...
Crete man gets 4 months in jail in 'revenge porn' case
IKEA MonkeyDudes are the worst part 2
A Crete man who identified a woman in a secretly recorded, sexually explicit video he uploaded to a pornographic website has been sentenced to 120 days in jail, authorities said.
Matthew R. Schwertfeger, who was sentenced Tuesday in Will County Circuit Court, was also ordered to serve 30 months...
Britain's Old People Have Just Screwed Their Grandkids
IKEA Monkey*slow clap*
Nick Ansell / PA Wire/Press Association Images
Hey, grandma—what's up?
Oh yeah, thanks, I really would like a cup of tea that takes you 20 minutes of tinkering about in the kitchen to make because you insist on using a teapot every time—even though teapot tea tastes exactly the same if not worse than mug tea because you are using teabags not loose leaf; how are you a thousand years old and you don't even know this yet—but yes, thank you, grandma, I will have a small porcelain plate with three pink wafer biscuits on it, thank you.
Hey, so, grandma, just a quick one: what the fuck.
What the fuck, grandma.
Lean your wrinkly little face close to me and tell me what the fuck.
Yo, grandma, check it. Check this graph. Put on your reading glasses. Put on your additional reading glasses. Put on your third, industrial-strength pair of reading glasses. See this breakdown of Brexit voting by age:
Graph via WSJ
See you in there? You are that pink, blobby, soon-to-die bit by the bottom. Do you know how long it is going to take us to negotiate leaving the EU? The conservative estimate is two years—the exact same timeframe your doctor gave you the last time you had a check up. Tell me, grandma: why did you vote for a change you will never get a chance to see? Are you messing with me, grandma? Is this payback for a crime I do not remember committing? Is this because I shit on you that time? Grandma, I was eight months old. I shit a lot back then. I don't know why you think that, because you wiped my ass a few times when I was younger, I have to respect your bad opinions now.
A quick note about your doctor: your doctor is one of about ten percent of doctors who come from the EU. This is for a variety of reasons—we won't get into why you can't have a Nice British Doctor with Nice British Hands because of the whole Conservative government forcing the hand of the junior doctors upon which the service relies—but a lot of it is to do with the fact that to have an effective NHS, i.e. a health service with a diverse array of specialists and experts in different fields, you have to recruit from other countries. But now that's all gone fuck-a-doodle because the Brexit means it's going to be harder for the NHS to recruit doctors from Europe and harder for our doctors to go and work there, too. Let's not get onto the impending care crisis and how the six percent EU employment rate in an already stretched-to-breaking-point sector is going to be even more perilous once Brexit comes through. Yes, I know you don't trust Oana when she comes over twice a week because you "think she's going to steal your decorative plates," but she knows her way around a catheter tube.
Grandma, did you see that nice man Nigel who you like on the TV this morning? You like Nigel, don't you? He wears a tie. You know that bus he did that said the £350 million we supposedly pay to the EU a week will now be funneled directly into the NHS? Did you see him literally come out and say that was a lie, this morning? Hold on, I'll pull the video up on my phone. I know you don't understand phones. I know you don't understand "this Facebook." I know you don't understand things. Just watch the video where he admits literally hours after winning that the central tenet of his campaign was a lie.
You know how you say you can't get a doctor's appointment these days "because of immigrants?" You know how that is a lie, yeah? You know it's actually because public services are pushed to breaking point by a fundamental lack of funding and support, all backed by a government you just handed more power to? Also, you know how you wake up at 5 AM every day just so you can be the first person to call the doctor and ask for appointments? How you go to the doctor, like, ten, 15 times a week? You go to the doctor an obscene amount. And it doesn't even matter how often you go to the doctor, grandma. Unless he turns your body into a robot and your mind into a computer and powers you via solar, you are not going to be around to see these changes come into play.
Do you remember how you went to college for free? That was good, wasn't it? Do you remember when you bought your house in shillings, or whatever the fuck money was called back then? That was good, wasn't it? You got a pretty good pension, all in, didn't you, and retired on the dot at age 60, didn't you? That was good. No, you're right, though—it's millennials who are entitled.
I'm sorry, grandma, I'm just exceptionally mad and sad about the future. It's just: it's weird how you can barely make it to the grocery store across the road from here without six frantic phone calls to mom and a fucking £4 taxi and then another, additional, post-grocery store phone call to mom telling her how bad the grocery store was, but that you sure as shit found the chutzpah to shuffle down to the polling station yesterday to make sure you voted out of the EU, based on a vague prang of fear about losing our identity as a country.
Hey, grandma: weird that you are allowed to vote on a future you will never, ever see, but 16-year-olds aren't legally allowed to vote on the hell you are making them live through, and 18-to-24s are not actively targeted in voting campaigns, isn't it? It's almost like the only excuse you've had to leave the house in the last year-and-a-half is to go and carefully—with a pen you bought from home, because you're mad now—decide to fuck up the future for me and everyone I know.
Didn't know you hated disabled people, people of color, and women, grandma, but seeing as they are getting the sharp end of this Brexit fallout—and there is fallout, remember; the only things that are definitely happening as a result of Brexit are all bad and backed up by experts, and all the possible future good things are Nigel Farage and his ilk saying "maybe it'll be good now we don't have a European safety net? idk" and "immigration, which won't immediately go down in any discernible way, is still bad"—and that is thanks to you, grandma. This is all thanks to you.
I am leaving, now, grandma, but I just wanted to say this is war now. We are at war. Oh, you'd like to sit down on the bus? Well, I'd like to not live through another recession, so I guess it's tough shit for both of us. What—you wanted to go to the garden center with us on Sunday? Well, I quite wanted to go to Croatia this summer, but that's immediately costing me about 25 percent more thanks to your shonky voting. Oh, you'd like me to come visit you now and again? Dunno, grandma, a lot of my friends are now quite worried about their status in this country and whether they have to get visas now and I think I'd rather hang out with them. Nah, but at least you've got your national pride back, right? Sit here, grandma, with your doilies and your scones and your Keep Calm and Carry On tea towel, and your well dressing, and your framed photograph of the Queen, and your little Union Flag. You did it. You voted for this. Thanks a fucking bunch, grandma.
Follow Joel Golby on Twitter.
To see all our articles about the EU Referendum, check out Europe: The Final Countdown.
Lindsay Lohan's Tweets About Brexit Are Giving Me Life Right Now [Updated]
IKEA MonkeyThese are amazing

The multitudinous layers of the enigma that is Lindsay Lohan have continued to unfurl for us on the eve of the Brexit referendum—which is to say that who knew Cady Heron was hella into UK politics?
A Reporter Who Spent Four Months Undercover as a Private Prison Guard Is Here to Answer Your Questions
IKEA MonkeyClick through and read the Mother Jones piece. Its very, very long. Took me an hour to read here. But wow, it is an incredible piece of journalism.

Today, Mother Jones published a 35,000-word account of one investigative reporter’s stint as a corrections officer at a for-profit prison in Louisiana. For the next hour or so, Shane Bauer will be in the comments, answering your questions about his reporting.
A Reporter Who Spent Four Months Undercover as a Private Prison Guard Is Here to Answer Your Questions
IKEA MonkeyThis is some Nellie Blye shit

Today, Mother Jones published a 35,000-word account of one investigative reporter’s stint as a corrections officer at a for-profit prison in Louisiana. For the next hour or so, Shane Bauer will be in the comments, answering your questions about his reporting.
Martha Stewart, Luckiest Woman on Earth, Had No Idea Who Jonathan Cheban Is
IKEA Monkey1) I had no idea who he was either and 2) Martha, you are amazing.

Martha Stewart is one of my favorite human beings on this here planet Earth and it’s like she goes out of her way to confirm that my adoration is perfectly placed.
Social Security to run dry by 2034
IKEA MonkeyGreat! Since thats well before I retire can I stop contributing?
Making Art Can Relieve Stress at Any Skill Level
IKEA MonkeyI am living proof
You don't have be talented to reap the benefits.
Rauner Will Run For Reelection, Even Though He Is Reviled
IKEA MonkeyHe's going to lose
Good luck with your reelection bid, bud? [ more › ]
Paul Ryan Floats Idea of Suing the Man He Endorses for President
IKEA MonkeyWhat is even happening

Has Paul Ryan been brushing up on The Art of the Deal? Cause it seems like the House Speaker is copping a bit of Donald Trump’s signature litigious style.
The Immigration Battle at the Heart of Brexit
IKEA MonkeyThat is literally the same poster as the Nazi propaganda poster.
A former British minister’s apparent about-face on the U.K.’s continued membership in the European Union illustrates the central role immigration is playing both sides of the “Brexit” debate.
Sayeeda Warsi said Monday she was now backing the “remain” campaign after, in her words, the “leave” campaign had abandoned its moderate message to become “small-minded, xenophobic and inward-looking.” Her remarks to The Guardian:
The vision that the Brexit campaign is presenting is not the vision that me and other Brexiters started off with a year ago. The ‘hello world’ approach to Brexit, which is open-minded, visionary, inclusive, has been lost. The moderate message has been lost. And instead we have reverted to a campaign that says: ‘The Turks are coming, the Syrians are coming, the refugees are coming, the Muslims are coming, the terrorists are coming’.
Indeed, Warsi’s remarks are an apparent reference to a poster released last week by Nigel Farage, the head of the U.K. Independence Party (UKIP), which favors the U.K. leaving the EU. Here’s that ad:

The image on Farage’s poster was one of Syrian and other refugees and migrants walking through the heart of the European countryside to reach Germany, Sweden, and other western European nations, as Europe grapples with its most severe refugee crisis since World War II. Britain, like much of the rest of Europe, has been wary of letting in large numbers of these migrants and refugees. The U.K. retains substantial autonomy over how many immigrants it accepts from outside the EU. By contrast, though, under EU rules the U.K. cannot limit migration from within Europe, and has to extend to those migrants much of the same rights and privileges it gives its own citizens. It’s unclear if Brexit would actually reduce immigration to the U.K. About half of the migrants to Britain come from non-EU countries, and previous efforts to curb immigration have had limited success. Still, Farage’s poster struck a chord—or nerve—depending on your viewpoint.
It’s important to point out here that Farage’s ad was a UKIP poster—and not one issued by the official Vote Leave campaign, which is headed by Boris Johnson, the former London mayor who, like Warsi, is from the ruling Conservative Party. Indeed, many of those who support Brexit distanced themselves from the poster, while those who support Britain’s continued membership in the EU labeled it racist and, in an example of Godwin’s law as well as how far each side is willing to go to tarnish the other, highlighted some of the similarities it shared with World War II-era Nazi propaganda.
.@StripyMoggie Can't help but make a Nazi comparison to this rhetoric. pic.twitter.com/W209C6HjLT
— Brendan Harkin (@brendanjharkin) June 16, 2016
But even those who support Britain’s continued membership in the EU, and indeed believe that it makes the U.K. stronger, have been skeptical about immigration. In February Prime Minister David Cameron, who is supporting the “remain” campaign, had secured a host of concessions from the EU on issues including benefits paid to EU migrants. And Jeremy Corbyn, the head of the Labour Party, who is also supporting the U.K.’s continued EU membership, said over the weekend: “I don’t think you can have [an upper limit to immigration] … while you have free movement of labor.” The comments were seized upon by his rivals in the debate. But those rivals have also been quick to distance themselves from Farage’s poster. Johnson criticized it, and said Britain’s exit would help “neutralize anti-immigrant feeling.” He added he was “passionately pro-immigration and pro-immigrants,” and went as far as to call for an amnesty for immigrants illegally in the U.K. for 12 or more years because it was “the humane thing to do.”
Farage has stood his ground, insisting the only reason he’s being criticized is because of the assassination last week of Jo Cox, the pro-remain Labour Party member of Parliament. And while Michael Gove, the justice secretary and leave campaigner, said Farage’s poster made him “shudder,” he has also previously warned of the consequences of Turkey’s accession to the EU, saying it would pose a security risk to Britain as part of his argument for why Britain should leave the bloc. (The prospect of Turkey joining the EU in the near- or medium-term is dim.)
Warsi, the former minister, told The Guardian she had hoped the debate over Brexit would become more measured following Cox’s assassination, but “when I turned on the television on Sunday morning and saw Nigel Farage defending the indefensible and Michael Gove continue to peddle lies about Turkey’s accession to the EU, that for me was a step too far.”
The referendum is on Thursday—and polls show a statistical dead heat.
Honey Releases Amazon Price Protection to Find You a Better Deal
IKEA MonkeyNeat

We’ve told you all about the couponing tool Honey, which automatically hunts for and applies coupon codes for your online purchases. The browser extension recently released a new feature that can help you find better prices on Amazon.
Go Full MacGyver With This 5-Step Process For Getting Gum Off Your Jeans
IKEA Monkey"Gum" was not the first word I saw when my eyes scanned the headline
So you’ve gone and sat in a wad of gum. Sucks, huh? Don’t despair. You might still be able to salvage your favorite pair of blue jeans with the help of some unexpected gum-removing tools that might already be sitting around your house.
A lot of people reach for ice cubes when trying to de-gum their denim, but the textile experts down the hall at Consumer Reports say that heat and a bit of chemistry are your best bet.
The Tools
Before you get to removing the Hubba Bubba from your derriere, you’ll need a few tools so you can go full MacGyver on the sticky stuff:

• Hair Dryer
• Plastic Knife
• Polyethylene Plastic Bag (like Ziploc)
• Bengay
Step 1:
Heating with the hair dryer will soften up the wad of gum and allow you to swoop in and remove much of the mess in…
Step 2:
This should clear off much of the affected area, leaving only the most tenacious clingers. That’s where Bengay comes in.
Step 3:
One of the active ingredients in Bengay is methyl salicylate (check to make sure first, as not all versions of the cream include this ingredient), which should dissolve the gum base, making it easier to pick off when you move to…
Step 4:
Not only does the methyl salicylate in the Bengay dissolve the gum base, it makes the gum want to stick to the plastic in polyethylene plastic, like you’d find in a Ziploc sandwich bag. So slip your hand into one of those baggies and grab up what remains.
Now that your jeans are gum-free, it’s important to remember the final step, which will render all the other steps unnecessary…
Step 5:
To see all the step in action, just watch the short video below:
Photos: Summer solstice full 'strawberry' moon
IKEA MonkeyIt was glorious
The June full moon has traditionally been nicknamed the honey moon or the strawberry moon because of its large, reddish-amber appearance in the sky. On June 20-12, 2016, the month's full moon fell on the first day of summer -- the summer solstice -- for the first time since 1948, according to the...
Setting a Walmart Fireworks Display on Fire Is a Spectacularly Stupid Thing to Do
IKEA MonkeyNo way man, that's 'Merica

Not treating fireworks—aka unlicensed explosives—with the respect they deserve is one of the most dangerous thing you can do. So after a couple of pranksters in Phoenix, Arizona, thought it would be funny to start a chain reaction on a shelf full of fireworks in a Walmart, humanity has reached a new low.
Incredible breakdancing crew from Korea
IKEA MonkeyHoly shit
Morning of Owl is a dance crew from Korea and they are from The Matrix, I think?
How did you do that? You moved like they do. I've never seen anyone move that fast.
Amazing athleticism and coordination. (via @aaroncoleman0)
Tags: dance video




