En el episodio de hoy charlaremos con la psicóloga Begoña de Campo sobre reprogramación mental, los traumas más habituales y los retos actuales de la sociedad a nivel psicológico.
📚 Capítulos: 00:00:00 Introducción 00:01:58 Cómo funciona la reprogramación mental 00:09:22 Así debes gestionar los traumas 00:19:16 Traumas más comunes 00:22:48 ¿Se puede mejorar sin sufrimiento? 00:25:35 El truco para conseguir tu propósito 00:30:43 Por qué hay tantos problemas de pareja 00:38:59 Por esto los niños están tan adictos a las pantallas 00:48:03 Cómo lidiar con los problemas de dinero 00:50:35 ¿Es necesario ser narcisista per ser exitoso? 00:52:59 Diferencias entre un psicópata y un narcisista 01:02:55 ¿Estás preparado para recibir amor? 01:21:08 Traumas más típicos de mujeres y hombres
Desde que Israel empezó la sangrienta operación de castigo contra Gaza tras los atentados del 7 de octubre de 2023, trece nuevos países han reconocido el Estado palestino. El gobierno de Netanyahu ha recibido esa noticia con una rabia desmedida, calumniando y amenazando a las naciones que han dado ese paso. Como respuesta, los elementos más ultras de su gabinete creen que ha llegado el momento de extender el caos de Gaza a toda Palestina: su ministro de Seguridad Nacional, Itamar Ben Gvir, anunció que planteará formalmente la anexión de Cisjordania en la próxima reunión del gobierno israelí.
En una publicación en X, Ben Gvir, urgió a la «inmediata aplicación de la soberanía sobre Judea y Samaria». Es decir, a llevar el Estado israelí hasta su propio domicilio, ya que él mismo vive como colono en los territorios ocupados. Ha llamado a esta operación «contramedidas» al reconocimiento del Estado palestino de una cada vez más amplia mayoría de la Asamblea General de las Naciones Unidas.
Bezalel Smotrich, otra de las voces más influyentes y más ulraderechistas del gabinete de Netanyahu, apoya la idea de continuar el genocidio gazatí en tierras de Cisjordania para «eliminar de la agenda la estúpida idea de un Estado palestino para siempre». Esa despectiva forma de referirse al Estado palestino es habitual también para el primer ministro: hace solo una semana calificó estos reconocimientos como «un absurdo premio al terrorismo». Cabe recordar que atendiendo a sus órdenes cerca de 65.300 personas han sido asesinadas en Gaza.
Mientras perfilan sus planes anexionistas, la situación en Gaza se deteriora hasta límites inconcebibles. La huida de la capital gazatí está dejando «escenas desesperadas», según los informadores de Al Jazeera que aún están trabajando sobre el terreno (Israel ha asesinado a 12 colaboradores del canal y, en total, a más de 250 periodistas en la Franja). Los hospitales funcionan bajo mínimos y allí hablan de «un baño de sangre». La anestesióloga Saya Aziz, del hospital Al Shifa, afirmó a la cadena que la situación era «catastrófica» y califica lo que está viendo como «el horror absoluto». «No creo que nadie haya vivido algo parecido», declaró.
El hospital Al Shifa es el más importante de la Franja de Gaza y su director, Mohammed Abu Salmiya, afirmó ayer que teme por su vida tras el ataque israelí que el sábado mató a su hermano y a los tres hijos de este. «Yo podría haber estado entre los muertos», dijo a EFE. Israel aseguró que su hermano pertenecía a Hamás y que planeaba un ataque inminente contra las tropas hebreas que se han adentrado en la Ciudad de Gaza. «Esto es una mentira y una calumnia que pretende justificar la matanza de civiles», afirmó el médico.
El Ejército israelí bombardeó la vivienda de la familia de Abu Salmiya, ubicada junto a la playa, una de las zonas más pobladas a raíz de las numerosas olas de desplazamiento forzadas por los ataques de Israel. Las imágenes de la carretera de la costa, colapsada de vehículos y personas a pie, han dado la vuelta al mundo en los últimos días. Según la ONU, más de 250.000 habitantes se han sumado al éxodo palestino, aunque mucha de esta gente no sabe exactamente a dónde ir. «Llevamos dos años viviendo así. Ya no tenemos dinero para seguir moviéndonos. Hemos dejado atrás todas nuestras pertenencias, incluso a nuestros hijos. No sé dónde están ni adónde se han ido. No sabemos adónde vamos, pero no nos vamos de Gaza. No tenemos adónde ir», relató una mujer que ha sido obligada a dejar su refugio en una escuela de la ciudad.
El embajador de Palestina en la ONU, Riyad Mansour, afirmó que el reconocimiento de su país es algo de agradecer, pero que no es suficiente para detener el genocidio. A su juicio, es imprescindible aplicar una severa política de sanciones para frenar a Netanyahu. Y hacerlo, además, inmediatamente. Pero Mansour no es optimista al respecto: «Veremos más crueldad en las próximas semanas, quizás un mes o dos, antes de que el mundo pueda decirles: “Ya basta… No pueden continuar en este camino de locura, les vamos a imponer todas las sanciones posibles, toda la presión posible, para detenerlos”».
El oro no solo está caro: está en máximos nunca vistos. La cotización del metal ha subido un 1,1% en la sesión de este lunes, hasta los 3.728 dólares por…
Ibrahim Abayat, antiguo combatiente palestino, cuenta su historia a @AymeRoman en #noobstante Nacido en Belén en 1973, Abayat creció bajo ocupación, entre checkpoints, redadas y cárceles. Pasó por la tortura, perdió a más de 30 familiares y se unió a la Brigada de los Mártires de Al-Aqsa, brazo armado de Al-Fatah. Hoy lleva más de dos décadas deportado a España, sin posibilidad de regresar a su tierra.
Con él hablamos de lo que significa vivir en el exilio sin renunciar a la memoria, de cómo Israel ha intentado dividir y manipular a la resistencia palestina, del papel de los regímenes árabes y occidentales en el genocidio actual, y de qué esperanza queda para un pueblo condenado a resistir.
0:00 Tráiler 🎬 1:46 Ibrahim Abayat: la historia de un combatiente 🏠 3:25 Crecer en la Palestina ocupada 🚧 6:53 Las prisiones israelíes 🔗 10:45 Aprendió hebreo en prisión 📖 11:58 La resiliencia palestina ✊ 16:07 Al-Fatah, el FLP y Hamás: Diferencias 📋 20:14 Israel divide la resistencia y engaña a Europa 🌍 25:33 La falsa paz: Israel y los Acuerdos de Oslo 🕊️ 28:23 La "legitimación" de Israel ⚠️ 30:41 El liderazgo de Arafat 31:20 El asedio a la Basílica de la Natividad 🕍 41:28 El exilio forzado: de Belén a Zaragoza ✈️ 44:38 La estrategia israelí: el olvido 🪧 47:49 Choque cultural y denuncia de la injusticia desde España 🤝 49:54 Enseñar la historia: la diáspora Palestina 👨👩👧 51:59 La imposibilidad de volver 📑 55:22 Activismo, solidaridad y combate a la desinformación 🔎 58:40 Cómo ver No Obstante SIN anuncios 💡 59:26 ¿España hace suficiente? La hipocresía global 🇪🇸 1:04:33 Israel y la deshumanización 🗡️ 1:11:40 Violencia de colonos y el plan de anexión israelí 🏘️ 1:16:23 El 7 de octubre: cómo Israel lo utilizó 🔥 1:19:36 El sadismo israelí y el despertar de la opinión pública 👁️ 1:22:13 El cambio en la visión europea sobre Palestina 🇪🇺 1:24:40 La manipulación del término "antisemitismo" 🌀 1:29:58 Historia y realidad de la solución de dos Estados ⚖️ 1:36:36 La solución de dos Estados: ¿una necesidad? 📜 1:38:38 Falta de apoyo de los regímenes árabes 🌍 1:41:54 Libertad y justicia: la resistencia inquebrantable del pueblo ✊ 1:47:02 ¿Israel firmó su propia muerte? ❌ 1:48:48 ¿Reeducar a Israel? 🤔 1:52:35 Primera acción como combatiente 🪖 1:54:19 Teresa Aranguren: ¿es posible la convivencia post-genocidio? ❓ 1:58:50 Opciones legales para los deportados de la Basílica 📚 1:59:40 Epílogo 🌹
¿Realmente conoces cómo piensan los chinos? 🤔 En este episodio, hablamos con Adrián Díaz, un español que lleva 19 años viviendo en China, para descubrir los secretos de la mentalidad del dragón: ahorro extremo, ambición sin límites, disciplina y una forma de entender el capitalismo que rompe con todo lo que nos cuentan en Occidente.
En este programa hablamos de la compleja realidad de Colombia: las guerrillas, la desmovilización, los grupos paramilitares, el narcotráfico, la minería ilegal y el papel de Venezuela en este entramado geopolítico. Con la visión de Mauricio Guzmán, exmilitar y analista geopolítico, analizamos cómo estos factores han marcado más de 80 años de conflicto, el impacto de las economías ilícitas, la posición de las Fuerzas Armadas, los procesos de paz y la influencia internacional.
00:00 Introducción 01:50 El origen y significado del nombre monástico Karma Tenpa 00:05 Explorando el concepto de refugio y las escuelas budistas 11:58 Distinciones y métodos de la escuela budista Karma Kagyu 15:29 El viaje personal de Karma Tenpa hacia la vida monástica 23:46 Encontrando propósito y la esencia de la compasión 27:29 Cómo entrenar la mente y el corazón en la compasión 35:13 La reconciliación personal y el sentido de 'Hoy podría morir' 44:31 El voto de celibato: motivación, libertad y sus desafíos 57:21 La importancia del humor y sus comediantes favoritos 01:04:35 ¿Un Monje Con Un Apple Watch? 01:13:26 ¿Qué Lamentan los moribundos? 01:23:13 Reflexiones sobre la vida, la muerte y el papado de Francisco
Psicología: cómo gestionar a las personas que disfrutan discutiendo En la vida cotidiana, todos podemos enfadarnos alguna vez. Sin embargo, hay personas que parecen vivir para discutir, provocar malestar y generar conflicto constante. Este tipo de comportamiento es especialmente visible en momentos de tensión social o política, pero también aparece en el entorno laboral, en la familia o con amigos.
La psicóloga María Jesús Álava Reyes, en su intervención en el programa La Brújula de Onda Cero, analiza por qué estas discusiones interminables resultan tan agotadoras y ofrece claves eficaces para no dejarnos atrapar por el malestar que generan.
Cuando la emoción se impone a la razón: el secuestro emocional Una de las explicaciones más relevantes que aporta María Jesús Álava Reyes es el llamado “secuestro emocional”. Cuando sentimos enfado o ira, la amígdala —una estructura del cerebro encargada de detectar amenazas— puede tomar el control, anulando nuestra capacidad para razonar de manera equilibrada. Este mecanismo tiene una función protectora, pero cuando permanece activado o se transforma en agresión, provoca tensiones personales y colectivas. Comprender este proceso nos ayuda a tomar distancia antes de responder de manera impulsiva y a recuperar el control sobre nuestras emociones.
Por qué algunas personas disfrutan discutiendo No todos los perfiles que discuten lo hacen por el mismo motivo. Según María Jesús Álava Reyes, podemos encontrar: • Personas con un sentido exacerbado de la justicia, que sienten la necesidad de corregir todo lo que consideran injusto. • Quienes gestionan mal sus emociones y descargan su frustración en los demás. • Individuos con un locus de control externo, que culpan a otros de sus problemas y utilizan la confrontación como válvula de escape. • Personas tóxicas que disfrutan generando malestar, sembrando discordia para llamar la atención o reafirmar su poder. • Aquellos que siempre quieren tener la razón, dificultando cualquier posibilidad de diálogo constructivo. Identificar estos patrones nos permite protegernos emocionalmente y decidir cómo queremos relacionarnos con ellos.
El papel del orgullo y el ego en las discusiones En muchas ocasiones, los conflictos se prolongan porque el orgullo o el ego nos impiden ceder, incluso cuando sabemos que el otro tiene razón. Esta rigidez emocional alimenta tensiones que acaban desgastando los vínculos personales o profesionales. Aprender a relajar la necesidad de ganar y a priorizar el entendimiento es un paso fundamental para construir relaciones más saludables.
Claves para gestionar las discusiones y resolver conflictos María Jesús Álava Reyes propone varias estrategias para lidiar con quienes disfrutan discutiendo y, al mismo tiempo, cuidar nuestro propio bienestar emocional: 1. Reconoce lo que sientes. Pon nombre a la emoción antes de reaccionar. 2. Analiza la causa del enfado. Pregúntate qué te ha molestado realmente. 3. Comunica desde el “yo”. Usa mensajes en primera persona (“me siento…”) en lugar de acusaciones. 4. Escucha y respeta la perspectiva del otro. Incluso si no estás de acuerdo, entender su punto de vista facilita el diálogo. 5. Busca soluciones de beneficio mutuo. Abandona la idea de que siempre hay que tener la razón. 6. Practica la asertividad y la empatía. Defiende tus necesidades sin atacar ni ceder en exceso. Estas pautas fomentan conversaciones más productivas y reducen el desgaste que provocan las discusiones sin fin.
Asertividad y empatía: la clave para una convivencia saludable No todas las personas conflictivas actúan de manera deliberada; algunas simplemente carecen de recursos emocionales para expresarse de otra forma. En el extremo opuesto, hay quienes evitan tanto la confrontación que no llegan a expresar sus necesidades, acumulando malestar. El equilibrio se encuentra en aprender a razonar, comunicar con claridad y mantener la calma, priorizando la relación sobre el deseo de imponerse.
Cuida tu bienestar emocional con ayuda profesional Las discusiones constantes pueden desgastar nuestra energía y afectar seriamente nuestra salud emocional. Aprender a poner límites, mantener la serenidad y responder con inteligencia emocional es posible con el apoyo adecuado. En el Centro de Psicología Álava Reyes contamos con un equipo de especialistas que te ayudará a desarrollar habilidades de comunicación, gestionar tus emociones y fortalecer tu equilibrio interior. 📞 Contacta con nosotros y empieza a construir relaciones más sanas y una vida más tranquila.
#personas #disfrutar #discutir #gestionarconflictos #secuestroemocional #discusiones #discusionesfamiliares #problemaslaborales #asertividad #empatia #alavareyes • cómo gestionar conflictos • secuestro emocional • discusiones familiares y laborales • asertividad y empatía • Centro de Psicología Álava Reyes
This multi-part blog series is a backstory that deep-dives into the motivation behind building Kubernetes Operators for running databases. This fourth installment presents the remaining expectations (5–13) that users might have of the cloud provider’s DBaaS.
Image generated by Google Gemini
Written by: Boris Dali, Database Engineer @ Google (LinkedIn)
Disclaimer
First off, the disclaimer: this blog series is neither a Google official documentation, nor it is an authoritative source. For the former, docs on AlloyDB Omni in particular, please see here and for the latter, please feel free to reach out to the AlloyDB product team. Google Cloud official blogs are posted here. Medium hosts Google Cloud Community here. This is neither. The opinions I express here in this blog post series are my own and may not represent or agree with Google’s official position on the subject.
So what is it then? Well, if you think of this blog series as the one engineer’s pseudo random ramblings on a particular topic (“running databases in containers on K8s” that is), you won’t be far off 🙂.
Recap
If you missed the part 1, part 2 and part 3 of this backstory and want to follow along, it may be a more logical place to start there (and yes, if you haven’t read it, apologies in advance, it’s not exactly a short read 🙂)
To recap, I started with the goal of exploring my reasoning behind the decision to invest into containers and K8s as a viable alternative to the more mainstream ways of running databases, but went down the rabbit hole of building the foundation first. That foundational work is based on my analysis of the on-prem database reality (as I know it) and setting up the expectations of a cloud provider’s DBaaS system, so that I would feel sufficiently compelled to leave my cozy on-prem behind and find a new home for hosting my databases.
And, no, I’m still not done with my analysis/cloud expectations 🙂.
But I’m getting there… here are my remaining expectations##5–13:
Expectation #5: Remove a database as an innovation impediment
One common theme I observed in many on-prem customer development shops is the perception that anything to do with a database inevitably slows down the development process (hello NoSQL... as a reviewer pointed out, MongoDB and NoSQL databases in general were a rebellion against the need for creating a schema ahead of time… and yet relational databases persevere and I don’t believe it’s going to change anytime soon). Multiple reasons are usually cited including, but not limited to the schema changes that are notoriously difficult to reverse with the DDL changes, which typically are not idempotent and often not being backward compatible with the old code/data, SQL that is easy to write, but not being composable, difficult to test, especially via standard automated CI testing frameworks (be it unit, functional, integration or e2e tests for the stored code), difficult to use in standard CD pipelines for the schema and data builds, which often leads to “mocking” or “faking” even if DDL/DML is fully scripted and checked-in into to the same code repo as the “normal” application code.
The debate as to whether the business logic belongs to a database at all or should strictly be constrained to the app servers is as old as the relational databases themselves (or at least as old as when the stored code was first introduced, which in Oracle happened some 30 years ago around Oracle 7 circa 1992 when PL/SQL got the magic power to be stored and executed “locally” alongside the database engine). Personally, I tend to think that folks that are fierce defenders of just one of the camps, haven’t seen enough of the use cases to justify the reasoning behind the other approach, because in my experience it really “depends”. But in any case, one thing I’d really like to see from the cloud providers is any help in dispersing this perception. Tools, linters, IFTTT for app code/db code dependencies, automated unit test templates or anything else really to make database development and testing less of an uncomfortable snowflake.
How about an AI coding assistant that offers me two alternative implementations of the business logic inside an app server and in a stored code with complete unit test and functional test coverage, further augmented with the performance benchmark comparison of the two alternatives and a one-click button to migrate from one option to another? Can your cloud do that? That would be a real time saver for coding my new app (and allow me to justify my choice backed by functional and load testing numbers, not a hand wavy shouting match with the proponents of the alternative solution!)
AI Assistant generates two deployment options (image generated by Google Gemini)
Sidebar: Manage databases via the standard K8s toolset
Until I get to the promised land of not worrying about a database “shell” altogether (see my expectation#1), I’d very much prefer to manage databases the same way and ideally by the same DevOps/SRE folks that manage the apps as well (see the whole-stack SRE or a “platform” team idea I mentioned earlier). After all, databases and apps that make use of these databases, go hand in hand together. Changes, especially new features and releases, typically affect both, and are often carried out in production not by the same SWE and DBE folks that developed them in the first place, but rather via the automated CD pipelines controlled by the SREs (separation of duties, etc.). The operational consistency in handling the app and database changes significantly simplifies management/upkeep, promotes a single, unified deployment and change management process, making life of the platform team much easier.
I could be biased here due to the type of customers and their use cases that I’ve been exposed to recently, but what initially, appeared to be just a few edge cases, now looks more like a growing trend where customers standardize on K8s as their new preferred compute platform (see more on this point below in expectation#9). It’s great that your cloud’s DBaaS has a clean, well-defined, versioned REST API and a Terraform provider for declarative management, but if my platform team relies on Helm charts or OLM bundles or OpenShift templates for the app deployment, possibly across different platforms/clouds — which seems to become surprising common — so why are you forcing me to use a different toolset for just dealing with the database changes? Why the context switch?
Sidebar: Native support for managing database changes via GitOps
To take the above point a step further, many of the K8s customers rely on ArgoCD, FlexCD, Google’s own Config Sync or Anthos Config Management (ACM) or a similar toolset. This is a standard repo-based development practice that, if extended to IaC, brings consistency and rigor to the configuration and change management too. A change gets checked-in into a common code repository via the standard peer review and approval process, which then gets deployed (sometimes auto-deployed, aka “deploy on-commit” or “deploy on-merge”) and can be propagated from the Build to Test and all the way to the Production environments either automatically or by the SREs. Sometimes this flow is referred to as GitOps that I’d like to think of as a specific, opinionated, mature implementation of the DevOps principles and it’s especially relevant in the context of K8s. My ask is for the database changes to not be any different and for you, as a cloud provider, to offer me a support for an automated GitOps flow that handles app and database changes alike.
Sidebar: First class support for offline development
In my experience, there are two modes for developers to work with the backend database. Either via a centralized, DBA-controlled, well-maintained, periodically “refreshed” from production with the newest data (but hopefully sanitized, so that the real SSN and credit card numbers get properly obfuscated or removed). Or, the other mode is where each developer runs their own copy of a development database on their laptop.
While it may certainly be useful for developers to experience the perils of concurrency earlier on in the development cycle and so sharing one common database has its appeal, the Agile shops often value developer velocity above all else (deferring concurrency testing to other parties… like their end-users 🙂) and so a built-in ability to easily cut a dedicated database for each developer is often a welcomed feature.
As such, I’d like your database service to offer me a consistent snapshot of a database (based on thin provisioning, a-la Delphix), so that I can give it to my developers on a predefined cadence, say, twice a day, for them to easily spin up a copy of that database on their laptops.
There are two reasons for this request: laptops are ridiculously powerful nowadays and connectivity… isn’t. While the RTO mandate is all over the news these days, it is also not uncommon for many shops to pride themselves in being distributed and allow their staff to work from whatever location that makes them most productive. My shop is one of them where I endorse the “borderless team” idea and refuse to babysit my SWEs on how and where they spend their time (no punch cards!) as long as they deliver results. However, it’s mind-boggling to me that in the era of space travel, nuclear power plants, AI and upcoming quantum computing that crossing from NYC to New Jersey over the Hudson through the Lincoln or Holland tunnels, one still invariably loses the Internet connectivity for a minute or two. This is the reality of the largest US city and so it’s not hard to imagine what happens to perhaps less developed parts of the world.
I’d also like to draw a parallel with the version control systems here where Git, despite being way late in the game compared to much earlier and well established competitors like CVS and Subversion, won over the developer hearts by being distributed and allowing offline/local commits.
Want to win the hearts of my developers? As a cloud provider, offer them a similar-to-Git feature for your database service, which acts as a laptop docking station (for databases) where my developers can just “plug in” their locally made schema or data changes and your service would re-synchronize it with the central database.
Offline development and sync with central database (image generated by Google Gemini)
TL;DR: As a cloud provider, help me accelerate my development process by making me feel less handicapped by my database, by the changes that I need to make to my schema and to the physical database layout. Help me remove a database as the bottleneck in my Agile process (and let me treat it as a commodity, inline with my expectation#2 presented in the previous post… and, no, please don’t refer me to NoSQL).
Help me scale my IT department. Give me the facility to treat my database changes the same way as the app’s. I say what table to change and what the scope of my change is (Dev, Test, Prod) and you do the rest, ensuring safe, gradual propagation of a change (and if needed, a safe, orderly roll back of a rogue change in the opposite direction).
Expectation #6: Database service without limitations on features/options/configs
Fully managed DBaaS systems understandably limit me as a customer on using some of the highly privileged database operations, adding extensions that require flag changes, “unsafe” database flags/parameter settings, etc. What I’d like to see from you, as a cloud provider, is to offer me a shared responsibility mode where I, as a customer, get to temporarily acquire the “root” privileges to do my thing. The level of your support would get temporarily degraded and so a traffic light of the “supported status” would switch to “yellow” or may be even “red” depending on the level of my indiscretion, but it would also show me the path to how get back to the supported state of “green”. That is, I’d like to see you, as a cloud provider, offer me a concept of conditional SLOs where I, as a customer, can temporarily take over the reins.
In particular, I’d like to host an async replica of my database outside of your cloud, either on-prem (for hybrid) or on another cloud provider (for multi-cloud). This is an important use case for me for the initial cloud migration (just switch to the cloud hosted replica to become the primary) as well as having a clear, tested, always-on “exit strategy”, if I need one in the future.
Following the same theme, the other feature I’d like to see is the ability to run some of my data intensive jobs alongside the database, not on the app server shuffling tons of data back and forth and consuming the network bandwidth to get the single-row aggregate numbers that I’m after for my report. That is, I happened to have some legacy shell an Perl scripts that today run via a cron facility on a database server directly (perhaps using local connections too, e.g. via the Oracle Bequeath (aka BEQ) protocol or the Postgres trusted connections from the localhost), that do the infamous row-at-a-time processing on large datasets. Rewriting it for batch processing is expensive and so I’d like to keep the “shell access”, and have the ability to continue running these shell scripts “locally” as I do on-prem today. Please don’t force me to reengineer my on-prem app/database for cloud on day one.
That last point of bringing compute closer to storage — and not the other way around — applies not only to the legacy shell scripts, but can be generalized to other use cases as well (including AI) and as such, I consider it to be a legitimate expectation of a cloud provider’s DBaaS system to offer me this flexibility. Some of these “compute to storage” use-cases can be solved by using the stored code, but some require extensive access to the OS and so an OS script may be a better fit.
Expectation #7: A-la-carte database services
In contrast to the canned, black-box DBaaS system, I’d also like to have the flexibility of outsourcing — and paying for — only a few services that I struggled with in the past, say, backup and patching. I like the idea of keeping control and using my own monitoring tools, for instance, because they are used company-wide and have plug-ins for databases, but they require a highly privileged database account, so I need my databases to remain “white boxed”. I don’t need monitoring and alerting from you, as a cloud provider, but I’d like to buy just the standalone backups and patching services on their own.
Obviously if circumstances change and I would temporarily not need these two services, I’d like to have the flexibility to suspend them too — and stop paying for them — so I’d appreciate the PAYG model, not just the subscription based one.
Can your cloud sell me just these two services a-la-cart… and perhaps I’ll consider others, like your AI-driven data insights service, if I gain confidence in your offering?
Expectation #8: Less archaic licensing model
One can also argue that in contrast to the traditional, brick-and-mortar database providers like Oracle, modern day cloud database offerings should be free of any licensing charges for use of the standard functionality, free of the dreaded license audits, free of the license true-ups, which inevitably bully customers into higher costs, higher maintenance fees or forcing customers to buy additional unwanted products. Don’t follow the model of the close source licensing products. The future belongs to the open source databases and charging for their use (even if additional features are added to it) is not the way to go in my opinion. Charge me for the value-add services. Charge me for support beyond what I can get from the open source community. Charge me for unearthing hidden gems and generating insights from my data, unleash the power of your AI to tell me when I should double down on running an advertising campaign for my shirts and shoes and how to change my supply chain… But don’t charge me for the base database use that I can get up and running on my own.
For instance, Google AlloyDB added a columnar engine, support for asynchronous I/O starting from Postgres 16 (which only lands in OSS Postgres starting with version 18), adaptive vacuum, AlloyDB AI (with the AI query engine, support for NL2SQL queries, the ScaNN indexes, etc.) index advisor and other innovations. These are value-add services that don’t exist in OSS Postgres and so it’s unlikely that an AlloyDB customer would find support for these advanced features in the open community forums.
But most importantly, if your cloud DBaaS indeed offers me a proprietary automation in a way that I don’t need to worry about a database “shell” altogether (see my expectation#1 where a database start/stop, elasticity of all the underlying raw resources that my database relies on, including disk/CPU/memory auto extend to a customer-predefined limits, backups are taken when needed during the quiet periods without me specifying the retention, maintenances are hidden from me, predictable performance is guaranteed with adding ultra fast or whatever caching solution, etc.)… that’s the service that I’d pay a premium for! As a customer, I do see this as a win-win for me and for you, as a cloud provider, and so I’m willing to invest into it.
If you, as a cloud provider, can’t do that, innovate harder until you can.
Expectation #9: Portable compute platform
I‘m left with the painful scars (call it PTSD) from going through the licensing battles with proprietary database vendors. There’s a reason why there are consulting firms out there that are built by the ex-license auditors (aka LMS) and make it their whole business to help companies like mine to survive license true-up reviews. As stated in expectation#2 above, vendor lock-in fear is real for me and I’d like to avoid going through a similar experience with the cloud providers at all costs.
To that end, an important expectation on my wishlist is to be able to deploy my databases on a compute platform that is portable with minimal hassle between the cloud providers and on-prem. Traditionally, my IT department runs databases either on bare metal servers or VMs, but an EC2 instance is not the same as a GCE instance nor an Azure VM. The APIs for provisioning and managing them are very different and tightly integrated with the rest of each cloud provider’s resource hierarchy. They are also very different from my on-prem vSphere-based estate. I’d like to do better if I move away from my co-lo. I’d like to standardize on a compute platform that is ideally OSS, with the thriving open source community that stands behind it, but also the one that comes with the cloud vendor’s support. And yes, I’d prefer to be able to run it in my basement too (what else are basements there for? 🙂).
Surely it won’t be a production-grade deployment in my basement and I’m willing to tolerate slower than the sub milliseconds response time, but the point is that it should still be functional. For that to happen, the base compute platform needs to be portable (even if the flavors of that compute platform may differ across vendors, the core is to remain homogeneous and compatible across clouds/on-prem).
Expectation #10: Support for limited connectivity
The other item on my wishlist is the ability to run partially or fully disconnected (i.e. air-gapped). Some of my shops are in remote locations and while mine is not a regulated industry (where I would imagine it is an even stronger mandate, hello IL6) and doesn’t have sovereignty or similar requirements, I had problems with the connectivity in the past where a technician may not arrive for a few days, but the shops should continue to operate as a normal Point of Sale (PoS) systems for selling my shirts and shoes.
Expectation #11: Support for hybrid and multi-cloud
I touched based on this in my expectation#2 in post 3 (“third missing infra dimension… a database”), but to make this item on my wishlist explicit, I’d like to point out that some of my shops are and will remain on-prem. This is for various reasons and intermittent/poor Internet connectivity in some areas is one of them.
If I’m to move to your cloud, I’d like to keep a replica on-prem (or on another cloud, as an insurance policy) for migrations, failover/DR, exit strategy, data consolidation via hub-and-spoke architecture, etc. Please don’t tell me to resort to a logical replication for that reason, because we tried it in the past and there are quite a few inherently painful limitations that make it a non-starter solution for us.
There’s also another challenge that I’d like to draw your attention to. My systems are interconnected. The PoS systems from the stores need to send the aggregated data back to the central databases for processing, analytical calculations, analysis of the sales, inventory replenishment, possibly supply chain adjustments and forecasting. If I’m to move some of my core systems to your cloud, while some other databases are to remain on-prem, on location… do I end up managing two separate, very different platforms where my IT personnel need to be well versed in both? Surely your DBaaS offers automation, but unless you offer full Data as a Service as I described in my expectation#1, my IT folks still need to deal with space management and monitoring and corruptions, etc., do they not?
What I’d like then is the ability for you to offer me the management of my on-prem databases remotely from your cloud as a central point of control. That is,
allow me to register my remote, on-prem databases
give me an option to offload my on-prem taken database backups to a cloud (better than the off-site tapes!)
allow me to send the logs and metrics from the on-prem and show them to me on your cloud console alongside the databases that I create “natively” in your DBaaS system. This should give me a single pane of glass access via UI/CLI to my whole database fleet, irrespective of where it’s hosted and allow me to run the aggregation in your Google Cloud Monitoring or Amazon CloudWatch against both types of databases
allow me to manage that on-prem database from the cloud console as though it was “cloud native” (while also allowing local changes).
allow me to dial-home to your cloud to check for patches and updates or better yet, alert me when the zero-day vulnerability hits, so that I don’t fall behind in applying the fixes
perhaps most importantly, allow me to manage these on-prem databases in bulk, so that, for instance, I can flip a flag in all Dev or Test databases all at once without worrying that I perhaps missed some and end up with the inconsistent database fleet where some Test databases may have a different configuration from Prod. That’s a feature I don’t easily have on-prem today (depending on the engine, toolset, etc.)
Attachable databases, that’s how I refer to these databases that are not “natively” created by a cloud provider’s DBaaS system and yet displayed on a cloud console alongside them and offer the same management capabilities… except that these on-prem databases can be offline for a while and when they do come online, please synchronize the outstanding logs/metrics to cover the timeline gaps… like nothing happened.
And yes, as the on-prem business owner, I’m risk-averse enough to not put all the eggs in one basket, so if I’m to move to your cloud, I’d like to be able to run on your competitor’s cloud as well. Can your database service do that? (and yes, I’m aware that Google Cloud, for instance, does help customers like me to facilitate multi-cloud computing by waiving some of the egress fees, but can a database run seamlessly on Google Cloud and AWS with minimal changes on my part as a customer to manage it and hook up my apps?)
Expectation #12: Declarative database management
Traditional APIs are imperative where a caller can model the app behavior via direct, targeted API calls, e.g. “create me a database”. In contrast, the SQL language is declarative where a caller defines “what” they want to see and not “how” it is executed. In the former case a caller is responsible for keeping up with the ever-changing provider’s APIs (which are always backward compatible, right? 😉) , “chaining together” the individual lower level calls to what sometimes looks like a “workflow” with all the custom error handling of each API calls (e.g. create an org, create a folder, create a project, create a VPC, create a subnet, create a firewall, create a PSC, use that VPC and that PSC for my DBaaS).
In contrast, the declarative world typically offers higher level abstractions and the work is done by the system, not by the caller. In my experience, these declarative, intent-based systems stand the test of time better, survive longer and as such, offer more stability for my apps and my business. Similar to SQL, I’d like for you, as a cloud provider, to offer me a declarative API for managing my data (see expectation#1) and my databases (see expectation#2).
Expectation #13: Better than the in-house/on-prem DBaaS
As they say, there’s only one constant thing that is sure about modern IT: change. Technology changes so fast that unless a particular tech stack du-jour happens to be my primary area of expertise, I can barely keep pace with the acronyms that seem to pop up like mushrooms every other day (and some disappear almost as fast). Yes, some shops do build an in-house DBaaS, which may very well be better suited, more tailored to their business, cheaper too, but how likely is it that my whole IT –not just my database engineering team– is as big as Google’s? If not, wouldn’t it be reasonable to assume that whether it’s big data, AI/ML, containers/Kubernetes, Go/gRPC/protobufs, or any of the other technologies… the best and the latest is likely to be found on a cloud? Why? Because cutting edge innovation is what brings cloud providers their competitive advantage. Because that’s what they do for living and they are likely significantly larger in size than my IT department. If that’s not where my databases are hosted too, I’m likely missing out. I’m likely not as fast as I should be. It’s not FOMO, it’s economics.
As an on-prem business owner, I get that pitch, the argument. I really do. Cloud extends the realm of possibilities, opening up the tech stacks and tech venues that are not easily achievable technically or which are prohibitive economically. What’s out of reach for me on-prem may be available on a cloud. Not only available, but it may save my business time and money by avoiding the reinvention of the proverbial wheel that may have already been discovered and used by other enterprise customers on a cloud.
For instance, I realize that adding analytical capabilities is only a few clicks away if I move my database to Google Cloud SQL MySQL or PostgreSQL hosted DBaaS and hook up BigQuery to it. If I need to go a step further and add ML on top (e.g. to take advantage of a linear regression, binary logistic regression, K-means clustering, etc.), as it happens, this functionality is part of BigQuery too! The point here is that while it’s certainly possible for me to stand up a similar functionality in house, on a cloud I get it in a few clicks, in a self service manner, as a managed service, production ready and with the best-in-class SRE team that guarantees its availability.
This agility is hard to get on-prem. I get that, but, again… going back to my earlier point, what I need to see is how this advanced functionality applies to my business. If you, as a cloud provider, don’t make it dead simple for me to see… I won’t see it.
The TL;DR: of these 13 savvy on-prem risk-averse customer expectations that I listed in these four blog posts is that I’d like to see from you, a cloud provider, offer me a cost reduction for running my apps. I’d like to see the life of my non-IT folks becoming easier and making them more productive (more self service of the daily operations, new services not available on-prem, less mundane tasks, faster and more reliable apps, less tickets, less red tape). Is that too much to ask? We’ll check that proposition in the next installment 🙂.
Reality Check
Now that I’m finally done with defining all of my 13 expectations, in the next installment I intend to run a reality check to see how cloud provider’s DBaaS systems fare against my imaginary wishlist. Thank you for sticking with me!
Until then! See part 5 <link…>
Credits
The Omni Database Engineering team at Google is the one that makes the magic presented in this blog series happen. I was the first, founding engineer, helped build the team, became a TL and later UberTL, so I believe I have a good perspective of why and how we approached the Operators and evolved them over time. Today, AlloyDB Omni K8s Operator is the production grade database management solution used by major banks, retailers and other customers and the eng team deserves all the credit.
I’d also like to thank Marc Fielding, Gleb Otochkin, Anand Kumar, Virender Singla, Martin Nash and Ash Gbadamassi for reviewing these blog posts, correcting my broken English and my broken thoughts. All the remaining mistakes and inaccuracies are obviously still mine.
En los últimos años escuchamos cada vez más la palabra “desdolarización”, un proceso que puede cambiar el equilibrio financiero global más de lo que parece. Rusia y China, empujados por sanciones y desconfianza hacia el dólar, han empezado a comerciar en sus propias monedas.
En este vídeo analizo cómo hemos llegado hasta aquí: desde los primeros intentos en 2018 hasta el papel actual del yuan en los pagos internacionales, el sistema CIPS como alternativa a SWIFT y el trasfondo político que ha acercado a chinos y rusos como nunca antes.
¿Estamos ante el principio del fin del dominio del dólar o solo ante un espejismo? Te muestro los datos, la historia y mi experiencia en China para que saques tus propias conclusiones.
La Casa Blanca lo presentó como un endurecimiento «para traer solo a los mejores», mientras su propio secretario de Comercio presumía que, si una empresa no paga cada año, que «contrate a un americano«. Es difícil encontrar una manera más clara de describir un impuesto al talento y una invitación al arbitraje para los muy ricos.
Ese efecto también es visible en la demanda: el cupo anual H-1B, de 85.000 plazas, se agota sistemáticamente en una lotería que selecciona entre cientos de miles de registros. El grueso de quienes la obtienen proviene de India y China, y la industria tecnológica, con Amazon a la cabeza en 2024, es la principal usuaria. No hablamos de un privilegio de Silicon Valley: universidades, sanidad, manufactura avanzada o finanzas también dependen de esa vía para cubrir puestos que el mercado doméstico no abastece. Penalizarla es, por tanto, un impuesto transversal a la competitividad.
Tercero, la inseguridad jurídica. No es evidente que el Ejecutivo pueda imponer por decreto un arancel de seis cifras a un visado cuya estructura de tasas fija el legislador. Los propios analistas señalan que el texto nacerá con alta probabilidad de cautelares y litigios, añadiendo incertidumbre donde se necesita previsibilidad. Si el objetivo declarado es el «onshoring» de capacidades críticas, sembrar dudas regulatorias y hacer más caro contratar a especialistas es el camino más corto hacia el offshoring. Ya pasó en 2020: el gobierno restringe, y la respuesta de las empresas es mover sus equipos fuera.
Al final, lo relevante no es si el impuesto es anual o único, ni cómo bauticen a las tarjetas para super-millonarios. Lo relevante es el mensaje y sus efectos: Estados Unidos, que dominó el siglo atrayendo a quienes querían cambiar el mundo, está diciendo que prefiere ingresar dinero rápido con tasas frente a atraer cerebros. Ese «impuesto al talento» no protege a nadie, empobrece a todos. Silicon Valley, y el resto del país, no se construyó cerrando puertas, sino abriéndolas. Cobrar por abrirlas y subastarlas al mejor postor es la manera más rápida de perder lo poco que les va quedando de ventaja.
Cuando un estudiante de Psicología imagina su futuro, generalmente suele pensar en una consulta acogedora donde ofrece terapia y acompaña a sus pacientes. Lo que rara vez imagina es la parte menos “romántica” de la profesión: las facturas, el alquiler, la gestión de la agenda… y, sobre todo, cómo conseguir que las personas que necesitan ayuda sepan que existe.
En la carrera nos preparan para comprender, orientar y cuidar, pero poco se habla de cómo sostener la práctica profesional en el mundo real. Aprendemos teorías psicológicas, técnicas y enfoques terapéuticos, pero no cómo dar a conocer nuestro trabajo. Nadie nos enseña a hacernos publicidad. De hecho, incluso puede sonarnos mal.
El tabú del marketing en la Psicología
A algunos psicólogos, la sola mención de la palabra “marketing” les pone los pelos de punta porque les parece que es mercantilizar la profesión. Creen que hacerse publicidad implica reducir el acto terapéutico a una transacción comercial. Otros sienten que promocionarse es poco ético y piensan que la calidad del trabajo basta por sí sola.
Como resultado, no es extraño escuchar ideas como “un buen psicólogo no necesita publicitarse”, “los pacientes llegan por recomendación” o “si me exhibo demasiado en las redes sociales, perderé credibilidad”.
Esos prejuicios provienen en gran parte de una visión excesivamente tradicional del trabajo del psicólogo en la que se espera que los pacientes toquen a su puerta como antaño. Sin embargo, en un entorno en el que la competencia profesional es mayor y la manera de buscar ayuda ha cambiado, el marketing se convierte en una herramienta esencial.
Las personas ya no consultan el directorio telefónico para buscar un psicólogo, revisan Google, Instagram o TikTok. Por supuesto, siguen confiando en la recomendación de un amigo, pero ahora esa sugerencia compite con un océano de reseñas y opiniones online. Vivimos en una época en la que la reputación profesional también se mide en estrellas, visualizaciones y comentarios en Internet. Por tanto, el prestigio se construye tanto a través del boca a boca tradicional como con el “boca a boca digital”.
¿Qué es el marketing para psicólogos exactamente?
Cuando pensamos en la publicidad, solemos imaginar anuncios llamativos o mensajes de venta agresivos, pero el marketing para psicólogos se enfoca en comunicar con claridad quiénes somos a nivel profesional, cómo trabajamos y qué valor diferencial podemos aportar.
No es vender humo y mucho menos manipular. En el ámbito de la Psicología, el marketing consiste en informar, educar y generar confianza para que la persona que necesita apoyo y orientación pueda encontrarnos. En este sentido, promocionarse es tan solo una manera de ampliar nuestro alcance y poner nuestras habilidades al servicio de quienes buscan orientación.
De hecho, el marketing de atracción se aleja bastante de la publicidad intrusiva para enfocarse en atraer clientes ofreciendo contenido de valor y experiencias relevantes. Un vídeo breve explicando qué es un ataque de pánico, un artículo sobre cómo gestionar el estrés laboral o un post aclarando mitos sobre la depresión son tanto contenidos informativos como estrategias de marketing.
Cuando un terapeuta comunica bien, no solo se da a conocer, sino que contribuye a la divulgación psicológica. Y en una época en la que abunda la desinformación y la autoayuda simplista, las campañas de marketing de un psicólogo pueden convertirse en una forma muy valiosa de educar a las personas y acercar la Psicología con rigor y accesibilidad al gran público.
La ética del marketing en la salud mental
Hablar de marketing para psicólogos sanitarios despierta sensibilidades porque, a diferencia de otros ámbitos profesionales, no se trata solo de captar clientes sino de cuidar la salud mental. Eso implica una gran responsabilidad.
Mientras un despacho de abogados puede promocionarse con frases como “ganamos el 95% de los casos”, en Psicología este enfoque sería inadecuado. No podemos tratar al paciente como un cliente más porque la relación terapéutica tiene un componente humano y ético mucho más delicado.
De hecho, el Código Deontológico del Psicólogo en España advierte que “los profesionales colegiados habrán de ajustar su conducta en materia de comunicaciones comerciales a lo dispuesto en la Ley”.
En el ámbito sanitario, la legislación obliga a:
Realizar una publicidad objetiva, veraz, clara y prudente.
No se puede usar el miedo, la angustia o la vulnerabilidad de las personas como recurso persuasivo.
El mensaje debe transmitir rigor y credibilidad, no competir usando frases agresivas como “los mejores en ansiedad” o “la terapia definitiva”.
Evitar mensajes sensacionalistas, engañosos o poco dignos.
Esto implica que un psicólogo puede anunciar su consulta, tener redes sociales y ofrecer información valiosa, siempre que no incurra en prácticas engañosas o poco éticas. El límite, en última instancia, está en el respeto a la profesión, a uno mismo y al paciente.
De hecho, trasladar estos principios a la práctica no siempre es sencillo. Hay que conocer bien las normas legales, cuidar el lenguaje y mantener una coherencia que mejore la marca profesional. Por eso, no es extraño que en los últimos tiempos también hayan surgido agencias de marketing digital para psicólogos que se aseguran de que podamos comunicar lo que hacemos de forma fiel, responsable y eficaz.
El marketing como puente entre la consulta y el mundo
En definitiva, el marketing no es más que un medio para acercar la Psicología de manera honesta, transparente y respetuosa a quienes la necesitan. No entra en contradicción con la esencia de la profesión, es una herramienta complementaria para poder ejercerla en la actualidad.
La clave consiste en encontrar un lenguaje que aporte valor y permita tender puentes entre la profesión y la sociedad, entre nuestra consulta y quienes buscan ayuda. Y es que en los tiempos que corren no basta con ser buen psicólogo, también hay que saber publicitarlo. A fin de cuentas, contar lo que hacemos forma parte del trabajo.
Por tanto, quizá la pregunta que cada psicólogo debería plantearse no es “¿debo hacer marketing?”, sino “¿qué tipo de marketing quiero hacer?”. El reto consiste en publicitarse con ética y sentido.
💌 Contacta conmigo o solicita más información sobre mis servicios en info@claudianicolasa.com o por Whatsapp al +34 679 65 89 30
00:00-01:12 Las suegras conflictivas rompen relaciones 01:12- 01:57 50 días gratis de Nextory 01:57- 04:53 ¿Por qué estos perfiles buscan conflictos? 04:53-07:45 Cuando el sistema familiar se ve en amenaza 07:45-09:01 El rol de tu pareja en el conflicto con tus suegros 09:01-12:18 Las dinámicas familiares patológicas 12:19-14:07 La técnica del registro para neutralizar la manipulación 14-08-15:50 La técnica del eco para neutralizar la manipulación 15:50-16:59 La técnica de la extinción para neutralizar la manipulación 16:59- 18:15 La técnica de los pequeños premios para neutralizar la manipulación 18:15-21:26 Cómo hacer ver a tu pareja la realidad sobre su familia
¿Te han preguntado “qué te pasa” y has respondido “no me pasa nada”? Por lo general, esta frase esconde tristeza, ansiedad, enfado, frustración o cansancio emocional. A veces, no estamos listos para manifestar nuestros sentimientos o no sabemos cómo hacerlo, y preferimos utilizar estas palabras como un mecanismo de defensa o una manera indirecta de comunicar las emociones.
Expresarnos de esa forma no siempre es negativo, en ocasiones, lo hacemos para autorregularnos y buscar una mejor ocasión para hablar sobre lo que nos afecta. El problema surge cuando se convierte en un patrón constante de evitación emocional. Te explicamos cuáles pueden ser las causas detrás de esta expresión y cómo aprender a reconocer y decir lo que sientes.
¿Qué esconde la frase “no me pasa nada”?
Hay varios motivos por los que una persona puede ocultar sus sentimientos. Primero, miedo a ser juzgado o que los demás resten importancia a su estado emocional y piensen que son débiles. También es una forma de protección para no mostrar vulnerabilidad.
La falta de claridad interna es otra razón. Sucede que las personas no logran identificar con exactitud lo que sienten y prefieren callar. Además, piensan que si hablan podrían generar discusiones, entonces optan por reservar sus comentarios.
Por otra parte, la cultura influye. La sociedad nos enseña que debemos aguantar o ser más fuertes, lo que nos lleva a ocultar emociones como el estrés o la tristeza.
¿Por qué tendemos a minimizar nuestros sentimientos y qué impacto tiene esto?
La creencia de que debemos ser resistentes y no debemos quejarnos le resta importancia al malestar. La falta de educación sobre salud mental hace que muchas personas no sepan describir en palabras sus sentimientos. “¿Y si incomodo a alguien con lo que digo?”.
Pensamos quecompartir emociones es cargar a los demás, pero a veces es necesario desahogarse. La crianza también afecta. Si de niños invalidaron nuestras emociones, en la adultez es más fácil estar en silencio que decir lo que sentimos.
Reprimir de forma constante las emociones puede causar problemas de salud física, como dolores de cabeza, insomnio o tensión muscular. A nivel mental, favorece la acumulación de estrés y aumenta el riesgo de ansiedad, depresión y sensación de aislamiento.
No sientas miedo: reconoce y expresa tus emociones
Ocultar los sentimientos dificulta crear vínculos auténticos. Las relaciones cercanas se fortalecen cuando compartimos cómo estamos, incluso si piensas que puede ser incómodo. Te damos algunas estrategias para que puedas identificar y comunicar tus emociones:
Obsérvate: haz pausas de unos minutos para identificar emociones y relacionarlas con sensaciones físicas. Por ejemplo, un nudo en la garganta puede ser tristeza o ansiedad.
Nombra las emociones: esto te ayuda a reducir la intensidad del malestar; no hay nada de malo en decir “me siento frustrado” o “me siento ansioso”, por ejemplo.
Valida lo que sientes: reconoce la tristeza, el miedo o el enfado. Esto no significa debilidad, sino que es parte de la experiencia humana.
Practica la comunicación asertiva: reemplaza el “no me pasa nada” por frases como “me siento abrumado y necesito un momento”, o “estoy triste, aunque no sé muy bien por qué”.
Busca apoyo: hablar con amigos, familiares o profesionales de la salud mental puede ayudarte a aliviar esa carga.
No olvides que la buena comunicación es necesaria para muchos aspectos de la vida. Cuida tu salud mental y pide apoyo psicológico para adquirir herramientas que te permitan expresar tus emociones de forma saludable.
I was hired from outside the organization two months ago to turn a lagging department around. My boss, the CEO, was hired from outside about eight months ago for the same reason.
This week my peer told me, “I told Boss that he knocked it out of the park hiring you. He said ‘Yep, and she really sings her praises, too.’”
I’m sooo embarrassed. I had no idea that I’d made any comments that came across that way, let alone enough to be a trend. My confidence is badly shaken.
I have been critical to my boss about many things I have found going on in my division, and then I have outlined for him how I am changing them. I have often said things like, “Why would my predecessors have done this that way? It doesn’t make any sense!” I can absolutely see why this came across poorly. I’ve been trying to demonstrate that I am doing what he hired me to do: identifying problems and implementing solutions. Instead, I’ve just come across terribly.
In addition to changing my behavior immediately, should I address this topic with him generally, without mentioning that I heard this feedback from my peer?
Yeah, criticizing your predecessors isn’t great in most circumstances. You can factually report on things you’ve found that need to be changed, but generally you should do it without editorializing about their judgment.
I probably wouldn’t raise it with your boss at this point; just be very deliberate about not doing it any more and that will hopefully take care of it. That said, if you’d be more comfortable addressing it, you could say something like, “I realized I’ve sounded critical of Marcel and Paige, and I didn’t mean to. I’m sure they had reasons for setting things up the way they did, and I don’t have the context they did.”
You could also make a point of looking for opportunities to demonstrate humility and to genuinely praise others, both of which should be helpful in counteracting whatever early impression he might have formed.
2. We don’t want employees wearing shirts with political messages
I’m a manager at a very small and young company. We do not have HR, and we’re trying to figure out an employee code of conduct that is both respectful and legal.
Our company provides services to the public as a whole, though we especially cater to and market to queer/trans, BIPOC, and other marginalized communities. As such, many of the people who choose to work for us are members of those communities (though not all) and are generally quite politically liberal.
Recently one of our customer service employees wore an item of clothing that showed their ideological view on a subject that is both controversial and often associated with liberal views, but the subject was in no way related to the work we do. I personally do not agree with the view, but my feeling is that even if I did agree with it, it was an inappropriate thing to wear in that setting since it 1) wasn’t relevant to our work, and 2) could be upsetting to some of our customers. Also, a member of our staff was wearing it at work could imply that we as the organization hold views that we definitely do not.
As a result, we on the leadership team are talking about producing company-branded shirts and asking our employees to wear those. While that may take care of the immediate clothing issue, we’d like to create a dress code and/or code of conduct that makes it clear that we will continue to be obvious about our support and inclusion of marginalized communities, but we also discourage display or discussion of other political views when they are not relevant to the purpose of our work. Do you have any guidance for how to draw that line?
Switching over to requiring a company shirt every day — essentially a uniform — is an overreaction unless there’s some other reason to do that.
You can simply have a dress code that prohibits political messages on clothing (or messages/writing/images if that seems easier/cleaner than debating what counts as “political” and what doesn’t) — which is a very common and routine policy for employers to have. Explain that it’s to avoid alienating customers who hold different views and to avoid giving the impression that the organization itself endorses the viewpoint. You can note that the organization very well might endorse the viewpoint, but it’s impractical to evaluate every t-shirt in advance to ensure it’s aligned with your messaging.
If people seem irked because they think some messages should obviously be allowed (for example, a pro-equality t-shirt), explain that without a blanket ban you’ll end up spending time debating exactly where the lines are, which will end up distracting from the actual work you’re there to do.
(And I write this as someone who won’t be returning to a massage clinic I’ve gone to for years because I don’t want a massage from someone whose water bottle has a sticker inciting violence against Jews. People do remove their business over this stuff.)
3. Everyone has suddenly started using my full name
My name is a very standard first name for American men, but I go by a very standard nickname of said first name both personally and professionally (think “Matthew” and “Matt”). I’ve been at my current job for a little over two years and have rarely had a problem with people calling me “Matt” before the last couple of months.
At the end of our staff retreat in June, one of our executives referred to me as Matthew in front of our entire staff. I made a joke about him using my “government name” and that being absurd as I’ve always gone by Matt, which he apologized for. Beginning around the same time, he’s done it again, our CEO has done it, directors have done it. I’m getting introduced to external partners as Matthew. I just learned that one of the interns I managed from the summer, when she and I had a discussion about others calling me by the wrong name, referred to me by my full first name in a social media post.
I realize this has a different flair than the standard “manager compulsively nicknaming employees,” and it feels silly, but I feel wildly disrespected. While my full first name is a great name that I enjoy, none of these people are my mother and I feel like I’m about to get scolded. I began at this company with my nickname and that’s how everyone has met me. There are only 25 of us and I’ve been in roles spanning across the organization; everyone knows me, and this is not from a lack of familiarity.
I’m extremely consistent about correcting people when it happens and reinforcing that my name is, in fact, Matt, but it keeps happening and I can’t shake the feeling that I’m not being taken seriously because of this. What would you advise?
That’s extremely odd! Can you just address it directly with each person who does it the next time they do? For example: “You and others recently started calling me Matthew, but I’ve always gone by Matt. Can you return to using Matt?” And then if that same person does it again: “Okay, what is up with this? It’s Matt, and I’m baffled about why everyone has switched en masse. Can you help me remind people it’s Matt?” And from there, if it still keeps happening, just correct it every time and move on: “It’s Matt. The answer to your question about oatmeal research is…”
4. Is this interview request excessive?
I’m in the middle of a lengthy job hunt and am midway through an interview process for a fairly senior role where they have now asked me to create a 30-minute roadmap presentation for the future of their product. To support this, they’ve sent me 8(!)+ hours of video training and several lengthy scholarly articles that I need to read all before even starting the work — with the interview in less than a week. This feels excessive to me but I’m looking for a gut check. I haven’t interviewed in years and that was for entry-level positions. My years of reading AAM are throwing up flags but with how the job market is now it’s also hard to feel like I should just stop this process.
It’s excessive — the eight hours of video “training” (?!) more than the rest of it.
Whether or not that means you should decline to do it is a different question; you’ve got to factor in how much you want the job, your sense of how strong a candidate they think you are, and how many other options you have. But it’s excessive, for sure.
5. Announcing a new job if you just announced a different job
You’ve written before about how to handle having to turn down a job offer that you already accepted. My question is, how do you handle the announcement to peers on LinkedIn and the like when you make a sudden switch like that? This is all still hypothetical, but it could very quickly become something I have to contend with.
I recently accepted an offer for a contract gig after a long search and posted my happy news on LinkedIn, receiving many congratulatory accolades from colleagues and friends. After accepting, I canceled an interview for a second contract gig that had been scheduled for a few days later. Though the job description was a good match for me, the rate was ridiculously low and the recruiter hadn’t gotten back to me when I emailed him about raising it. The evening after I notified him of my withdrawal, the recruiter suddenly came back saying the client is very interested in me and they may be able to make me a better deal than the one I accepted and they want me to keep the original interview slot.
I want to be ethical and professional, but what’s the best move here? Is it wrong to at least hear them out? I want to be an honorable person, but this is a brutal job market and I’ve been laid off twice in two years, so I also need to do what’s best for me and my family as well. Sigh. Even if it doesn’t make me a horrible person, just the thought of rescinding my acceptance and disappointing/angering/inconveniencing so many people makes me feel like a monster.
Finally, back to that LinkedIn announcement. If I did accept the second gig and had to rescind my acceptance of the first one, what should I do about that post? Just leave it to gather dust? Quietly delete it and eventually change my status to reflect my new job? Post an explanation (apology?) of what happened with a new announcement? Delete my LinkedIn profile altogether and go into hiding? Something else?
Go to the interview and assess the job (and their offer, if one materializes). You get to do what’s best for you, including backing out of an offer if a better one materializes. It’s business!
For LinkedIn, you’d just write something like, “Change in plans! I’m happy to announce that I’ll be working as a senior frog historian for the Amphibian Coalition, beginning next week.” That part isn’t a big deal; people know this stuff happens.
Se ha hablado mucho, tanto en este boletín como en otros medios, de lo difícil que resulta cubrir a un político como Donald Trump. La mayoría de gobernantes suelen hacer cosas como evitar cometer actos ilegales o protagonizar escándalos éticos indefendibles. Cuando son cazados, suelen sentir cierta vergüenza sobre ello, porque entienden que pueden ser impopulares. Quieren dar la mejor imagen posible a los votantes, porque entienden que hay actos que son inaceptables. La administración Trump no tiene ninguna de estas preocupaciones.
El profesor Yan Xuetong, una de las voces más influyentes de la academia china en relaciones internacionales, protagonizó un duro intercambio con un oficial israelí durante el Foro de Xiangshan, la principal cita de diplomacia militar organizada anualmente por Pekín.
etiquetas: china, israel, foro de xiangshan, propaganda
Mientras predica sobre los sacrificios necesarios y critica el despilfarro de las élites, el líder de Vox disfruta de un estilo de vida privilegiado y financiado con fondos públicos que contradice radicalmente su discurso. La imagen pública de Santiago Abascal ha sido construida cuidadosamente como la del político auténtico que comprende los problemas de todos los españoles. Sin embargo, un análisis detallado de su patrimonio, sus gastos y su estilo de vida real revela una realidad que contradice el discurso que esta vendiendo a sus votantes.
etiquetas: profeta, vox, santiago abascal, economía
Esta misma semana más excargos han acusado a la cúpula del partido de exigirles desviar dinero público a Disenso, el lobby que preside Santiago Abascal. Ignacio Garriga se ha referido a la polémica: "No entienden la honestidad de nuestras convicciones"
Un funeral convertido en acto de masas en Glendale muestra cómo EE.UU. transforma el duelo en espectáculo político. El homenaje a Charlie Kirk, con estética patriótica, seguridad de Super Bowl y tono religioso, evidencia la campaña permanente, la polarización y el uso de símbolos como armas culturales.
etiquetas: charlie kirk, eeuu, funeral, política, cultura, simbolismo
La UEFA está bajo una intensa presión para celebrar una votación la próxima semana sobre la expulsión de Israel de todos sus eventos, con funcionarios israelíes luchando para evitarlo, dijeron los medios hebreos el fin de semana. Israel Hayom y Channel 12 informaron que Qatar, uno de los mayores donantes de la UEFA, estaba presionando para que se celebrara tal votación, y la moción parece que se aprobaría si se somete a votación, ya que sólo dos o tres de los 20 países convocantes se oponen firmemente a la destitución de Israel.
